When Do You Know Your Memoir is Finished?

Posted by Kathleen Pooler/@kathypooler

“So I don’t think there’s some universal sign you can rely on to know it’s done. You just have to decide This is truly as good as I am able or willing to make this book, and then hope a publisher agrees that’s good enough.” ~ Elisa Gabbert

Photo Credit: Pixabay Free Image

 

 

When Do You Know Your Memoir is Finished?

There’s a difference between knowing when to scrap a story and when to keep writing the story you’ve been writing until it’s finished.

 

There were plenty of times in the twenty years I spent writing my current memoir, Just the Way He Walked : A Mother’s Story of Hope and Healing, when I had to walk away from it, either because I felt stuck with the story line or because I needed a break from the emotional intensity of reliving past challenges.

 

And there were many times when I questioned if I could publish this story about my son’s addiction. It required exhaustive negotiations about what to omit or change. And should I even consider publishing a story so personal and harrowing? Will it jeopardize my relationship with my son and daughter?

 

I kept going back to the main question:

What is my purpose in sharing this story?

This question was my guiding light through all the twists and turns of the writing process.

With my intent clear in my own mind…share hope with other parents of addicted children…I could reframe the story to guide my son through the process.

In time…and it takes time to let the story unfold…my sober son became more comfortable confronting past behaviors. We began having an open dialogue about the various scenes and he has helped me clarify the timelines.

 

So how do I know that the memoir is as finished as I can make it?

 

I don’t have those late night “scene pops” where I can’t sleep because I remember an important scene to include. I stopped writing frantic notes on napkins and any scrap of paper I could find before I forgot the thought.

 

I omitted scenes that didn’t move the story along.

 

Each re-read yields fewer typos or punctuation corrections.

 

I feel satisfied that both my children have had the time and opportunity to be a part of the process. No surprises.

 

I’m as finished as I’m going to be and am well aware that more edits will be in store when I send it off to a small publisher. It still needs a copy edit, final proofread, book cover and final formatting.

It has already been through the paces with eight beta readers and three rounds of professional developmental editing.

A memoir is finished when you decide it is finished.

I decided …it’s time to ship it and I will take it from there:

 

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How about you? When do you know your memoir or writing project is finished?

I’d love to hear from you . Please join in the conversation below~

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This Week:

Monday, 8/27/18:

August 2018 Newsletter: Monthly Updates, Memoir Musings and Max Moments:

“The Lessons of Grief”

Next Week:

Monday, 9/3/18:

“Our Stories Matter” featuring David Naiman’s middle grade novel  Jake, Lucid Dreamer.