March 24, 2014
“There are moments that you’ll remember for the rest of your life and then there are moments that you think you’ll remember for the rest of your life, and it’s not often they turn out to be the same moments.” Maggie Stiefvater, The Scorpio Races
It was the final semester of my senior year of college, I was sitting in class–Modern Algebra–trying to wrap my mind around some new material, when my phone rang. I ignored the first couple of calls because I thought my sister had forgotten I was in class. But then the text came, from another sister, asking me to call her, and I was worried. What could have happened? I wondered.
Within minutes of that call, I was in my car headed home. Joe, my companion of eight years, was down and could not get up. He seemed perfectly healthy, only he was unable to get his feet underneath himself. I knew on that drive that today was the day I would say goodbye, but I tried to banish the feeling because it hurt too much to consider.
If you have ever experienced a bond with a horse or other animal, you might understand the pang I still feel in my heart every time I get to the barn and he’s not there to greet me.
Joe changed my life. He came to me in my darkest moments and taught me what it was to be happy. Though I had ridden horses my entire life, he taught me to do it well. On his back and by his side I learned how to be confident in myself. He was a patient and kind teacher, letting me make mistakes along the way. And when I needed to cry, he would stand patiently while my tears soaked withers and shoulder.
There are several moments from March 24, 2014 that are fresh in my mind. Having my phone buzz in class, holding Joe’s head in my lap through his final moments, the heart wrenching pain of knowing that this was the last time I would see him in this life. These are moments that I don’t think will ever leave me. And I don’t want them to.
While Joe’s last moments were painful because I didn’t want to say goodbye, I had eight wonderful years full of happy moments that can keep him alive in my heart forever. And that is what I try to do every day.
My main writing project right now involves many horses, and I try to use Joe’s fiery personality combined with his gentle love to bring the horses to life. I want readers to feel the bond between horse and man the way I felt that bond with Joe.
Have you ever had an animal that changed your life? I would love to hear your stories, so please share them with me.
