It's Been Fun But It's Time For This to End

After weeks of consideration, I finally decided that it is time to say goodbye to my blog.  I haven't posted much in the last few months and have been wondering for a while whether or not to keep my blog.  

My mediation practice is really picking up only after a year of being in business.  For the first time in my life, I can say that I love my job.  Every case is different and brings many challenges - and I love that.  I'm also getting many opportunities to meet people within the law field and I'm reconnecting with my law school.  A couple of weeks ago, I volunteered to judge a law school competition and it was so much fun!  My heart skips a beat when I get a new court-appointed case in the mail.  I thought that I could keep up with my blog but when it comes down to my blog or work, I have to pick the one that is going to pay the bills.

But there is a bigger reason why I am choosing to close my blog.  Madelyne asked about her father this past weekend.  I was waiting for it but my heart still broke in pieces when it came.  It's not right that I have to explain to my 5-year-old that she has a father but why he isn't in her life.  And after telling her all the lies like he still loves her or maybe he'll come back, she looked at me with and asked, "Did I do something wrong?"

No, my sweet little girl.  You didn't do anything wrong.  You had the misfortune to have a man incapable of love as your father.  That was my wrong and I will spend the rest of my life trying to make it right.

I don't know how many of you saw Kelly Clarkson's emotional performance on Idol of her new song, "Piece by Piece."  It's about how her father abandoned her when she was little, how she found a man to show her love and a promise to her daughter that she will never leave her.  It was this performance that made up my mind to shut down my blog.

He walked away from her.  I've begged.  I've cried.  I've pleaded.  All to no avail.  He walked away and has told me that he doesn't care if he ever sees her.  If he doesn't care, then he shouldn't have the privilege of knowing anything about her.

When we last spoke over a year ago, he mentioned something that I wrote in one of my blogs.  At the time I was happy that he read my blog because my blog is where I found my voice to tell him how I really felt.  

But I don't need to do that anymore.  In fact, I haven't felt that need in a long time.  

It's time that I let go of this blog and become more private.  

I've enjoyed getting to know everyone who has ever contacted me through my blog.  It's been fun reading all of the comments.  But this is the right decision.  On March 5, 2016, I will be closing my blog for good.  Thank you everyone who has ever visited my blog.  I'm glad I made you smile or laugh.  :)  

​And for those of you read my blog and are also my friends, I'll see you on Facebook.  

Love,
Meg xoxo

PS - My brother has been waiting for this for two years now - I'm sorry for anything that I ever wrote on my blog that hurt your feelings.  That was never my intention.