Betty Adams's Blog, page 142

I'll Never Be Too Old to Read a Children's Book

"Libraries are like young ladies. They are supposed to be quiet but the best ones rarely are."
With apologies to Girl Genius

You know the book. That one. It rests with phlegmatic calm in the section of the library that is never really quiet. The section where the librarians have given up shushing all but the most bloodcurlding of screams. A hundred others sit on either side of it; taking up rank after rank of tall, deep shelves. They are every depth and thickness. Their covers are gleaming with newness and only one careless grab away from being thrown out. They are full of pictures showing every color of the rainbow and fascinating monochromatic cityscapes. The main character is a creature of some sort: furry, metallic, or feathered. They are all tempting but only one drew you here. That one.
You step slightly forward and your hand rises to touch the spine. The librarian's do-it-yourself lamination is holding but the air bubbles have formed on the corners and the top and bottom edges are fraying, revealing the slowly creeping stains. You carefully shift your fingers, hoping against hope that you remembered to wash your hands properly. You slid the book out from between its neighbors and it come free with a rush of memory. You flip the book to gaze down at the cover and your mouth begins to move silently as the words flow out of some deep treasure chest of memory. 
That is when you hear it; the unmistakeable sound of someone looking at you. You start guiltily and clutch the memory laden tome to your chest like a shield. She is standing behind you. Not right behind you. No, she would never invade your personal space. She belongs here in this semi-sacred place. The sticky little fingerprints that mark her pants are the badges that document her clearance. 
Not like you. You are all at once far too old and far too young to be in this place. You begin to panic. The book is heavy in your hands and you glance down at it in the desperate hope for inspiration. She asks if she can help you in a bright voice that shines right down into your cowering heart. An idea forms and you grin a little.
"Yeah, yeah you can. Do you, um, do you think that my, ah, my nephew would like this book?"
You hold the book up between you but you see her soften. You see her smile deepen with sincerity. She assures you that it is a wonderful book that boys and girls both love and don't you want a few more? You gulp down the last of your discomfort and nod frantically. This might be THE book, but there are others, and this one just gave you a free pass to get them.

#IWillNeverBeTooOldTo read children's books. 

Any Last Words?

When writing a character who is going to die the last words of said character are critical for many reasons. The last words can tie up a critical plot point. They can set the tone of the entire story. They can be a cheap punchline, an inspirational bromide, or a last curse.  It is a difficult point for an author if the reader knows the death is coming because it can set expectations high. 
Currently #MyLast4Words is trending around the internet and has produced some amusing gems along with some earnest cultural messages. 
"Hey Ya'll Watch This!"  is making the rounds of course.
As is  "I told you so!" 

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Pain and Suffering or Why I Wish I Took Typing Class

Imagine if you will, a senior screaming in agony as the computer crashes for the final time. The cloud has failed, the floppy disk cracked, the jump drive was corrupted. The paper is due tomorrow and the poor student is trapped in the land of hunt and peck. Typing is an arduous task that requires hours of time. Hours that should be spent in studying for other tests. Regret for wasted grade school time is a bitter pill and the student pledges to actually learn how to touch type as the paper finally lands on the professor's desk the next morning, still warm from the printer. Life is hard, it is harder if you can't type! 

Preparation is the Difference

Snowmageddon 2016 Washington, DC Crater Lake National Park, Tuesday When an author writes a civilization debilitating event into a  story it is critical to have an understanding of particular culture and sub-culture (real or imaginary) that it is affecting. In a rather spectacular example the winter of 2016 has left the capital of the United States crippled  under a few feet of snow. Meanwhile record breaking snowfall in Crater Lake National Park has the snow plow operators a bit tired. 
This is close to an actual difference in magnitude. So why is a massive and well funded city panicking while a little park is shrugging its collective shoulders and calmly raising their snowplow fuel budgets?  It is all about preparation.
In Crater Lake the snowplows are carefully tended all year and ready to go at a moment's notice. The snow will fall and the drits will last till June. The buildings are designed to take a snow load of ten to twenty feet and the plows can chew through five feet of road snow as if it were nothing.  
The snow is less frequent and far less intense in D.C. and so the crews are less able to respond to it. 
When writing a short story this can easily play into the immediate response of the characters. When world building for a larger story remembering to add little details like the damage the snow removal equipment leaves being visible even in the summer is very important. So go make some snow angels and remember that if the internet is knocked out then that is the best time for some undistracted writing! 

Bated or Baited?

When, according to Webster, one waits in a nervous or excited state because one does not know what will happen next, one is waiting with bated breath. 
Any cursory search of literature will find this term written as both bated and baited. The question becomes which is correct. (Now what Webster says is clearly known but where would be the blog post worthy rant in just following that old worthy blindly?) While baited breath might mean a peculiar method of hunting, bated breath is something of a curiosity. What does bated even mean? 
Fortunately there is an answer known thanks to the old Bard himself. In "The Merchant of Venice" Shakespeare  uses the turn of phrase in a particularly vicious sarcastic monologue and form context it becomes clear that bated is a shortened version of abated, which meant and still means 'to bring down, lower or depress' so basically to hold one's breath. 
The issue was clouded a handful of centuries later when one lesser poet, Geoffery Taylor, wrote "Cruel, Clever Cat" and described the pernicious beastie waiting with cheese baited breath. 
Now this author is prone to take the words of the Bard more seriously than an early twentieth century children's poet...except that it is quite common for barn cats to eat the seeds left out for songbirds....
As yet another old, dead author said, "Curiouser, and curiouser." 

Literary Error - Phrase Not Found

"While this word is spelled correctly it has not been used as a verb since the sixteenth century."
The author quelled under the correction...
One of the pitfalls of being a voracious reader is that an author's vocabulary can be a bit out of step with the rest of the population's. A turn of phrase that sounds perfectly normal to the writer might be an anachronistic monstrosity to the average reader that will send the scrambling for the nearest dictionary. This will often be futile unless the dictionary in question includes archaic meanings. Or as a comedian once put it.
"You cannot have archaic and edit too!" 

Writing Animals on Squirrel Appreciation Day

Who hasn't read books about, staring, or simply including animals? In a decades old tome on animal actors the author described the statistics of television commercials. The bottom line was that no matter how big a celebrity the company got the audience always remembered the product name better if there was a cute dog on the screen. Animals sell.
The question for an author then becomes how do you write an animal. Campbell, in his "Living Forest" series, simply wrote what he observed as a naturalist and freely and repeated admitted that any anthropomorphization was entirely his imagination. In fact one of the defining features of his writing was the mystery that animals presented. Other animal books simply turn animals into furry, feathered, and scaled people who speak and interact in a forest based sitcom. Jack London brought what many consider a more "realistic" approach, writing the animals as masses of instinct and primal need which even thousands of years of breeding and a lifetime of training couldn't overcome once Buck heard "The Call of the Wild". 
So what is your method for getting into the head of an animal you are writing? Something to think about on #SquirrelAppreciationDay

A Book to Remember for National Cheese Lovers' Day

Most people have a favorite childhood book. The range from simple counting books to the old classics if their parents had a literary streak.  Children's books tend to be colorful, simple, and whimsical. One that meets all three criteria is Russell and Elliott's "Mouse and the Moon Made of Cheese". As one might expect it is in rhyming verse and tells the story of how a young mouse strives to taste the cheese that makes up the moon. It is a fun read even if the reader is long past the target demographic. ​#NationalCheeseLoversDay

How I Stay Sane in My Workspace

Today's hashtag is #HowIStaySaneInMyWorkspace
Luckily for authors this really isn't an issue. The workspace of an author is usually how they stay sane in the first place. Or at least how they manage to keep their particular brand of insanity down to socially acceptable levels. 

Spring Sass

If an author needs to write a small sassy character there is almost no better place to look than the diminutive and indomitable hummingbird. January brings the first hints of spring to the Pacific Northwest small living gems began to return to the temperate rainforests. They are the only bird that is known to truly hover and are capable of building intricate nests. They are the smallest bird known to science and one of the most likely to attack humans. While a hummingbird dive bomb assault is more entertaining than dangerous their furious chattering can actually be a bit intimidating. So step outside and face the uplifted beak of the tiny terror of the flower bed, if you dare.