John Blumenthal

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John Blumenthal

Goodreads Author


Born
in Middletown, NY, The United States
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Influences
Eclectic--Joseph Heller, Kurt Vonnegut, Jane Austen, Nora Ephron,, Dav ...more

Member Since
January 2012

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Back in the day, I was an editorial staffer at Esquire, and later an editor, writer and columnist at Playboy magazine. Then came four years of screenwriting (2 movies made: "Short Time"-- Fox and "Blue Streak"--Sony) ), followed by my present line of work--novelist. I have plied that trade for about 15 years.

My sixth novel, THE STRANGE COURTSHIP OF ABIGAIL BIRD (Regal House) was published in October 2019. (It recently won the 2019 Next Generation Book Award for Fiction.)

I have written eight other books for publishers such as St. Martin's Press, Simon & Schuster and Ballantine Books. These include the novels, "The Case of the Hardboiled Dicks," "The Tinseltown Murders," the award-winning "What’s Wrong with Dorfman?" and "Millard Fillmore,
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John Blumenthal Hi Karen. I can’t do audible. My mind wanders too much.
John Blumenthal Sounds interesting, Mike but I just don’t have the time. For one thing I am a really slow reader and right now I’m reading to do blurbs and I haven’t …moreSounds interesting, Mike but I just don’t have the time. For one thing I am a really slow reader and right now I’m reading to do blurbs and I haven’t made a lot of progress so it’s getting backed up. But thanks for asking and for your kind words about my career. Best of luck! (less)
Average rating: 3.87 · 387 ratings · 89 reviews · 10 distinct worksSimilar authors
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What's Wrong With Dorfman?

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Amazon Customer Review Template

Here’s a template that should make it less tiresome for readers to write Amazon customer book reviews:

I found this (novel) (story) (insufferable twaddle) to be (engrossing) (charming) (moronic).The plot was (engaging) (fast-paced) (like watching paint dry) and the characters were (lovable) (lifelike) (mostly shallow simpletons). The prose style employed by this (writer) (literary genius) (total i Read more of this blog post »
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Published on December 18, 2019 12:46

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Three and a Half Virgins (Literature & Fiction)
1 chapters   —   updated May 13, 2015 06:37PM
Description: A man apologizes to four women whose hearts he broke twenty years before.
I Escaped from Au...
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Will in the World...
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Everybody Was So ...
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Look at the Birdie by Kurt Vonnegut Jr.
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Meh. Not too hard to figure out why these were unpublished
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Land of the Blind by Jess Walter
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The Fifties by David Halberstam
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The Plot by Jean Hanff Korelitz
The Plot
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It didn’t thicken. I figured it out one-third of the way through.
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The Mother Tongue by Bill Bryson
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Fascinating yes, but way more than I need to know. Too many long unpronounceable Welsh words, exceeded only by long unpronounceable German words. That said, Bryson’s knack for discovering minutiae is nothing short of amazing
John Blumenthal rated a book really liked it
The Mother Tongue by Bill Bryson
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Fascinating yes, but way more than I need to know. Too many long unpronounceable Welsh words, exceeded only by long unpronounceable German words. That said, Bryson’s knack for discovering minutiae is nothing short of amazing
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Blue Angel by Francine Prose
Blue Angel
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Amusing, well-drawn characters, but the plot seemed a bit ordinary. I gave it 4 stars because it grabbed my attention immediately, which seldom happens.
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More of John's books…
“One aspect of Samantha's personality that drove me nuts was her tendency to reveal herself via literary allusions. She called it a quirk, but it was more of a compulsion. Her mother was Lady Macbeth; her father, Big Daddy. An uncle she liked was Mr. Micawber, a favorite governess, Jane Eyre; a doting professor, Mr. Chips.
This curious habit of hers quickly made the voyage from eccentric to bizarre when she began to invoke the names of literary characters to describe moments in our relationship. When she thought I was treating her rudely, she called me Wolf Larsen; if I was standoffish, I was Mr. Darcy; when I dressed too shabbily, I was Tom Joad.
Once, in bed, she yelled out the name Victor as she approached orgasm. I assumed she was referring to Victor Hugo because she'd been reading 'Les Miserables.'. It didn't really bother me that much though it was a little odd being with a woman who thought she was having sex with a dead French author.”
John Blumenthal, Three and a Half Virgins

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“Boy meets girl. So what?”
Bertolt Brecht

“The best index to a person's character is how he treats people who can't do him any good, and how he treats people who can't fight back.”
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“I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book.”
Groucho Marx

“I took a speed-reading course and read War and Peace in twenty minutes. It involves Russia.”
Woody Allen

“Be yourself; everyone else is already taken.”
Oscar Wilde

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Comments (showing 1-14)    post a comment »
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message 14: by John

John Blumenthal megs_bookrack wrote: "Nice to meet you, John!
I actually read your book, What's Wrong With Dorfman? by checking it out of the Nantucket Atheneum!
I hope you make it back to the rock sometime..."


Nice to meet you too, Megs! That’s so cool—the Atheneum.. Didn’t even know the book was there. I hope the building still exists. Such a stately old Library! Haven’t been back to the Island for a while but would love to visit. Got a lot tougher to get there since I moved to LA. Thanks for connecting


message 13: by John

John Blumenthal megs_bookrack wrote: "Nice to meet you, John!
I actually read your book, What's Wrong With Dorfman? by checking it out of the Nantucket Atheneum!
I hope you make it back to the rock sometime..."


Nice to meet you too, Megs! That’s so cool—the Atheneum.. Didn’t even know the book was there. I hope the building still exists. Such a stately old Library! Haven’t been back to the Island for a while but would love to visit. Got a lot tougher to get there since I moved to LA. Thanks for connecting.


megs_bookrack Nice to meet you, John!
I actually read your book, What's Wrong With Dorfman? by checking it out of the Nantucket Atheneum!
I hope you make it back to the rock sometime...


message 11: by John

John Blumenthal Thanks for confirming!!

John


message 10: by Sophia

Sophia Appreciate the friend request, John.

Entertaining bio. ;)

See you around GR!


message 9: by John

John Blumenthal Carolyn wrote: "Hi John - thanks for your friend request!"

Thanks for confirming!
John


message 8: by John

John Blumenthal Hilarious! Thanks!
John


Carolyn Hi John - thanks for your friend request!


message 6: by John

John Blumenthal Funny


message 4: by John

John Blumenthal Thanks Majenta!


message 3: by John

John Blumenthal Majenta wrote: "Hello! Thanks for contacting me. Congratulations on your publishing success.

Have a good day.

Best wishes from Majenta"


Majenta wrote: "Hello! Thanks for contacting me.

Congratulations on your publishing success.

Have a good day.

Best wishes from Majenta"


Thanks Magenta!


Majenta Greetings! Thanks for contacting me. Congratulations on all your success. May it continue

Best wishes from Majenta


Majenta Hello! Thanks for contacting me. Congratulations on your publishing success.

Have a good day.

Best wishes from Majenta


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