Robert Lyman Baittie's Blog, page 5

There's no place like home.

Spiritual awakening is like seeing behind the curtain of the Great and Powerful Oz. You come to realize that your fears were nothing more than created illusions, and that the power to return home to love always existed within your own spirit. Our lives are the same journey as Dorothy’s—walking a golden path laden with joys, fears and challenges, meeting individuals along the way who want to help us on our journey, all the while burdened with having forgotten how to get back home ourselves. But if we remembered, there would be no journey. There would be no growth for our soul. So take comfort, walk the path, happily accept to walk with those who want to help you on your way, and persevere. Because ultimately in the end you’ll reawaken back home surrounded by all those who love you.

Chapter 82. Membership has its privileges.

February 6, 2015

Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born. ~Anais Nin

______

I have a very good friend who I have never met. He lives right next door to me on the other side of the globe. I say next door, because, although half a world separates us, we share our stories with each other like we’re talking over the fence. As such, we’ve come to know each other very well, and I’ve come to care for this friend very much.

While we’ve never had the fortune of meeting face to face, and I certainly can’t tell you what color his eyes are, I know exactly how he sees his world. Because I’ve looked through those same eyes myself. He sees his world as one of endless possibilities—for himself and for his family. He sees the possibilities that can come to a devoted husband and a loving father who works hard, plans and dreams of a better future. Because that’s the success he wants to be—be for those he loves—be for himself.

But now he sees the possibility of having everything he’s worked for, and dreamt of, and planned for stolen from him by a thief he never anticipated coming into his life. Parkinson’s disease. And that presents the possibility of seeing himself as a failure. It presents the possibility that his family might see him as a failure.

But you know what?, That’s not possible. Failure doesn’t exist until someone quits or gives up entirely. As long as you continue to try you’re not a failure, because the continuing challenge can ultimately lead to success. Success is not measured by what you attain, success is measured by what you accomplish. Parkinson’s is a challenge. A challenge to be overcome. A roadblock to maneuver around. Parkinson’s can most definitely eliminate some possibilities (I will never be able to type 60 words a minute again), but it can equally create new opportunities.

Our futures were never set in stone anyway. There never were any guarantees. So the “possibilities” of our successes playing out as we may have hoped they would, really stood as great of a chance as the “possibilities” of us being a failure. In other words, we shouldn’t get so hung up on every change in direction life throws at us and concentrate more on perseverance and overcoming the challenges.

The way I choose to look at it is, life on Earth is one big health club membership for our souls. Each one of life’s challenges work the muscles of your spirit to grow stronger and stronger. Embrace the opportunity to keep working out—after all, “No pain, no gain.” Problem is some of the people spend too much time standing in front of the mirror admiring their own physique instead of going over to the next guy who might need a hand.

I just want you to know, as your friend, I’ll spot you anytime.

The suffering of others is our own suffering, and the happiness of others is our own happiness.

More to come.

Tremors in the Universe is available in e-book, paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2015 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie

Chapter 81. Trust.

January 23, 2015

… it is not, so much, that we are human beings having a spiritual experience; rather, we are spiritual beings having a human experience…  ~ Dr. Wayne Dyer

_____

I returned home last Sunday from a 5-day retreat I had attended to experience and learn Shamanic healing. I use the term “returned” loosely, because I’m not 100% sure I’m really back. My physical body is here, but my mind (or some part of me) is definitely somewhere else.

For those that might be unfamiliar, Shamanic healing is spiritually-based, and is a belief that by utilizing the powers of “Spirit” (i.e., God or Divine Spirit, angels, spirit guides, ancestral souls, animal spirits, plant spirits, etc.) which we ALL have at our disposal, that we can enhance, facilitate, contribute to and aid in our own healing by releasing the bad energy we hold within our bodies and replacing it with good.

It’s you asking and allowing spirits to help you get rid of the baggage you’re carrying with you as you walk your path in life. It’s about choosing to lighten your burden. Learning how to walk with grace. Living a life in harmony with all living creatures and all spirits.

So how did this Parkinson’s patient fare?

I can sum it up in just three words.

I was healed.

I know. Strong words. But I can honestly say my Parkinson’s is no longer a part of me. It can’t hurt me anymore.

It’s been replaced by trust. The trust that comes from knowing that everything in life has a purpose. Everything. Every event, every joy, every sadness, every hurt, every suffering, every life, every death. It all has meaning and it all has a Divine purpose.

How do I know that for myself?

I was shown.

My healing came in the form of awareness. Having my eyes, my mind and my heart opened to the truth. The truth that there most definitely is a plan, and there most definitely is a reason for all that happens. I was shown that the promise that has been made to us since the beginning of time is still true today. We all are loved. We all ARE love. We just continually struggle to remember.

I was shared this gift because of my willingness to go deep within my soul, to the darkest places where doubts and fears and emotions stand guard over the curtains that keep out the light of our true Spirit. The light that illuminates the truth that “All is as it should be.”

There are spirits all around us who are with us, watching, supporting and are able to help us on our journey, if only we would ask. But they are powerless to do anything, because God gave us free will. They can’t intervene without you asking.

When I attended this retreat, I asked. And the spirits heard me.

I faced three separate fears that I’ve carried through this lifetime and a few of them possibly more, and with each I was shown the same answer—that all that happens and all that would or could happen comes from the same source of love. That all of my life’s challenges are for the purpose of my spirits growth, and that when I allow the darkness to overtake me, it is from my inability to remember. I was shown how my spirit chose to sacrifice its light so that another spirit could ultimately grow. What we often see and deem as suffering is done by choice and out of love.

The only way we can possibly experience our own light is to be thrust into the darkness. Darkness that I discovered comes from the shadows of angels wings.

More to come.

Tremors in the Universe is available in e-book, paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2015 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie

Chapter 80. No do-overs.

December 29, 2014

He turned his life around. He used to be depressed and miserable. Now he’s miserable and depressed. —Robert Frost

_____

Remember when you were a kid and there were “do-overs”? You know, that verbal declaration that you blurted out in the hopes of getting a second chance in a game without it having to cost you anything. Maybe you were playing jump rope, and three skips in you suddenly tripped, so you proclaimed do-over with that hopeful tone in your voice. Only to hear your friend quickly retort “no do-overs”. You were crushed.

Well that’s kind of what we do every year at this time as adults—as the New Year approaches we proclaim do-overs by coming up with a list of resolutions that we feel will somehow overcome all the short-comings we had last year. Those times we tripped. Maybe we ate too much cake or spent a little too much money.

Well you know what? There are no do-overs. You don’t want a do-over and you don’t need a do-over. The past is the past. What’s done is done. Not only has the paint dried, but the water that is under the bridge is filled with the tears you cried over the spilled milk—and that’s great! You don’t need to feel crushed because it means the only resolution you need to make in 2015, is to forget about your past and get on with living your life—in the Now.

Imagine this New Year you could erase all memory of your past from your brain entirely, leaving nothing more than a blank canvas. Who would you be? Without a history of yourself, no story to define you, who would you be?

If you think about it, you’ll discover that you’re really nothing more than the “you” that is existing right now, in the present, at this very moment. It’s probably a little difficult to comprehend because most of us rarely think of ourselves only within the reality of the present. But what other reality is there?

Strangely enough, the vast majority of us create a concept of our reality based on our past—our history. I say a concept, because that reality does not exist. It only exists in our minds. We allow ourselves to define a reality of ourselves through our past experiences. Experiences that quite often are filled with negativity. But why? Why hold onto a reality that no longer exists? When we do so, we burden ourselves with feelings of failure and guilt and we stay shackled to our past rather than freeing ourselves to enjoy the only true reality of now.

If you’re going to resolve to make a change in yourself in 2015, let it be that you will change how you see yourself. Resolve to not define yourself with the burden of your past. Clear your mind and see yourself in this very moment, today—perfect, and capable of being anything you want to be.

As the New Year approaches I am resolving to be.

And in doing so I am resolving to do the things that will help me be the person I want to be:

Smile at strangers.
See more clearly.
Listen with an open heart and a closed mouth.
Hold my hugs for one second longer.
Enjoy moments for what they are. Moments.
Forgive and Forget.
Sleep longer.
Look at my phone less.
Meditate.
Look forward.
Be gracious.
Wander with purpose.
Welcome life.
Collect more love. Store less hate.
Live what I believe.
Look less for, and more at.
Embrace what I don’t know.
Do what I’m afraid to do.
Change my mind.
Change my world.

My wish for everyone is that in 2015 you will make a resolution to just be.

More to come.

Tremors in the Universe is available in e-book, paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2014 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie

Chapter 79. A course in healing.

December 22, 2014

Not all those who wander are lost. ― J.R.R. Tolkien

On the 12th of July, 2012, I felt as though I had come to that critical crossroad in my life—you know, the proverbial intersection where when faced with a life-altering situation I was supposed to make the all-important decision that ultimately would determine the course of my life from that point forward—but ironically, as I stood there looking around, with the map of my life in hand, I found myself at an intersection where there was no other road to choose from but the one I was on. 

Behind me was the endless distance I had covered over the previous 52 years—the very route I had chosen for myself. I could see it all so clearly on the map I had drawn, only now it looked incredibly long and faded. And as I thought of how far I had come, it began to fill me with a sense of sadness. How could I have missed the exit along the way that would have taken me around all of this? How did I not see the signs? I couldn’t believe that I’d come all this way with such a clear vision of where I was going in life, only to unexpectedly come to a roadblock in the middle of nowhere—a roadblock in the form of Parkinson’s disease.

But as I turned away from my past and looked forward, the map of my life suddenly became a blank piece of parchment. Afterall, maps are essentially nothing more than documents laid out by one who has travelled a path before us, and I certainly had never been down this road. But there was clearly a road in front of me. The road however was one paved by the footsteps of others—Parkinson’s patients who had already fashioned a map complete with treacherous mountains to climb as well as valleys so low they walk you through Hell. I knew in my heart that wasn’t the route I wanted to take.

But what is a person supposed to do when they don’t want to follow the map of another? How was I to know where to go if I was to venture off in another direction of my choosing? My map was blank.

It’s impossible to demonstrate courage without the presence of fear. Only when we are willing to venture into that which we are unfamiliar with, can we discover the true meaning of life and all the beauty that it holds. It is at the crossroads of our lives where often our own fears consume us and try to hold us back. Our greatest journeys are those that take us through all that we fear and allow us to become vulnerable.

For me, the answer was to turn to the compass of my heart for guidance. Certainly if I could continue to show trust and faith in the invisible force that had always pointed me in the right direction, I could find a much easier route around this, a way to continue forward, and maybe even discover a path to my healing.

I knew in my heart I had no control over receiving a Parkinson’s diagnosis, and I certainly wasn’t feeling a need to hold myself accountable; Parkinson’s was not my punishment—but it was most definitely my obligation.

Choosing to create a map of my own was my obligation to the Universe I live in, that we all live in, an obligation to my children and something that I felt I owed to myself. An obligation, because by choosing to venture off the easy path (the path created by others) requires facing fears and dictating the path of your own life on your own terms and in the process you can create a light inside others to do the same for themselves.

Going through life without a map is not something to be afraid of, on the contrary, it’s incredibly refreshing, as you’re no longer obligated to follow the path created by the footsteps of another. If the life you dream of living requires venturing off on your own, don’t be afraid to get off at the next exit. Put your trust in the compass of your heart, make your own map as you go, and let your spirit guide you forward through life on your terms.

Follow your own path.

More to come.

A NOTE TO MY LOYAL READERS:

There may be an extended period before my next post as in approximately two weeks I will be following the compass of my heart to begin a new journey of discovery. I will be attending the first of four, 5-day spiritual retreats (one in each season of the year) with a refined focus on physical and spiritual healing; both a healing of myself as well as learning to share that service with others. I am very excited for this next part of my life journey and I will be anxious to share it with you when I return. Thank you all for your continued love and support. ~Robert

Tremors in the Universe is available in e-book, paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2014 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie

Chapter 78. If Only We Could All Remember.

December 6, 2014

I’m not trying to change the entire world—just mine.

____

Remember.

Remember is a strange word to me. I say strange, because it’s one of those words that at first glance seems so obviously simple by definition—to recall. Yet, when I stop and break down the components of the word, to me, it takes on a much deeper, spiritual meaning—to bring back together—a meaning that I’m sure the vast majority of people would never think about.

But if they did, it just might change their world.

Imagine for a moment, a world where you cared for and loved EVERY person just like they were your brother or sister—a part of your family, a piece of your flesh. What if they were as close to being a part of you, as you are to yourself? Each person, another piece of a puzzle that fits you perfectly and takes you a little closer toward completing a much bigger picture of yourself.

What if all it took, was for each of us to remember.

What started me down this path of thinking was my viewpoint regarding spirituality—that when it comes to being spiritual, there really isn’t much for us to learn—what it requires is for each of us to remember what we already know—what has always existed in our heart and in our soul. It’s an idea I hold based on my belief that spiritual knowledge is an inherent part of our energy, it always has been a part of us, and it always will be forever. It’s simply our task to bring it back into our consciousness.

With that thought in mind, I began thinking about all the great thinkers throughout the history of time; individuals like Aristotle, Leonardo da Vinci, Albert Einstein, Isaac Newton, Galileo, the list goes on and on. Individuals whose “genius” was in their unique, influential “first thoughts” that had a most incredible impact on our world. And I found myself not able to comprehend how it could be possible for any human being to have such a radically profound first thought. I mean, the vast majority of us learn from passed down knowledge, information that is presented to us through teachers, our parents and elders, those more knowledgeable, or through our own experiences. But to simply have a knowledge and then be able to prove it after it had never existed, is simply mind-boggling to me.

Unless the knowledge always existed—in all of us—and the genius was simply their individual, special ability, or gift, to remember what they already knew.

When presenting their knowledge, they always began with a theory.

Here’s mine.

____

Imagine a beginning, a creation, that was void of everything but a Divine energy, an essence, a being—God. And within that essence and energy was complete knowledge. The answers to everything. The power to know all and the power to create all—contained in the light of the spirit. It was whole and it was perfect.

Now imagine that energy exploding to create the Universe we know and all that which we do not know—everything that existed in the beginning, in the Divine, is now part of the “DNA” of the Universe—including each of us. As such, we ALL are a piece of that one energy. We all are from the same source. The same beginning. The same perfection. Within each one of us there exists all the knowledge, power, energy and spirit that is God.

To be a member, is to be part of a group.

I believe we all were members of a very singular group that once was whole, but now is fragmented only through our own individuality. And while the energy, power, and light of the spirit most definitely still exists in all of us and in all living things as it did in the beginning, it no longer is perfect (although it has the potential to be). The problem is that a great number of people see themselves only as individuals, separate from the whole and from the membership that was our beginning. Their view of life is one of strictly “I am” rather than “we are.” The fact that we are physically individuals and have the ability to say “I am” does not make us separate from each other. Quite to the contrary—we still are all part of one energy and all have the light of that spirit within us. For some it shines brighter than for others. For those, “I am” means I am a part of you.

Many continually search for signs of God externally because of a belief that the Divine is as separate from us as we are from each other, when in reality, the truth is, we are not separate at all—we are all part of the same beginning. We all are one.

When we allow ourselves to see each other only as individuals, we lose sight of the Divine that is in all of us—and we deny ourselves the energy that knows no race or religion.

As long as there continues to be a belief of separateness, and that a connection does not exist between all beings, we can never achieve a complete re-membering of what it was to once be whole or the realization of God.The answer to finding God will come through the re-membering by each one of us that God is in each one of us—and that God IS each one of us.

If only we could all re-member.

More to come.

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Tremors in the Universe by Robert Lyman Baittie

Giveaway ends December 23, 2014.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

Enter to win

Tremors in the Universe is available in e-book, paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2014 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie

Chapter 77. Many happy returns.

November 25, 2014

The greatest gift you can give somebody is your own personal development. I used to say, “If you will take care of me, I will take care of you.” Now I say, “I will take care of me for you, if you will take care of you for me.” ~ Jim Rohn

____

At this time of the year when everyone is fretting over how many shopping days are left, I’ve decided that I want to do something completely radical. I want to return all the gifts that have ever been given to me.

I know, that seems like a rather daunting task, but it’s an idea that has become incredibly important to me. While at first that might sound very unappreciative on my part, especially with Thanksgiving now upon us, it’s actually meant to be quite to the contrary. I find it to be the perfect way for me to express my gratitude—give it all back. Especially the things that fit me the best, the ones that were just the right color, and all the gifts that were gifts from the heart.

As anyone knows who has tried to return something, you’re going to need your receipts, to show where it came from. And for a lifetime of gifts, that is definitely a lot of receipts. But I have them all. I’ve kept them stored and categorized in the attic of my mind, locked in my heart, and the key to retrieving them is in my gratitude.

Every gift is a big list, but, as with any list you have to start somewhere, so I’ve prioritized my first three.

The first to return is the love of my parents. The two people who built a strong nest for my brother and I to mature in until we were both ready to stretch our wings, take that leap of faith and fly on our own. They constructed the nest with love, compassion and security, and it weathered the test of time and they watched with pride as we took flight. But unlike nests in nature, which are abandoned by all as soon as the young venture out on their own, my parents stayed and tended the nest, and there they found shelter under each others wing. But with age their ability to soar has vastly diminished, and I want to provide them with the security and comfort they afforded me when I could not fly.

The second is to return the gift I received from my spiritual guide and healing coach, Staci Oien. Staci allowed me to see my souls true purpose and to embrace it with love. Her vision for her work from the very beginning has been to help people discover for themselves how to love their own lives so fully that they can share that love with others and make the world a better place. Empower your own life and then empower others. Through my work with Staci, I’ve come to embrace every aspect of my life’s journey, including my Parkinson’s, and I’ve found a way to return her gift with an inner voice that has allowed me to share what individuals can accomplish by looking within themselves.

The third is the gift of love at first sight—that immediate and overwhelming attraction to, and love for another that many deem more of a cliche expression than a reality—but I know for a fact exists because I received the gift four times in my life; the first when I met a young girl in a pizza restaurant over 30 years ago, and then three more times with the birth of each of my children.

I want to give that gift to my oldest daughter and her boyfriend.

You see, I know there’s going to be a proposal tonight (he very respectfully, asked me for my blessing).

And as I sit here thinking of my daughter as a future bride, I can’t help but reflect on how I was blessed to watch her grow and become the beautiful woman she is today. She captured my heart from the very first moment I saw her—it was love at first sight from the day she was born—and that love has never wavered.

I want them both to always have that vision of each other—a love at first sight—that is blessed with compassion and kindness for each other. And may the love they both feel for each other today, be a gift they can give back to each other for the rest of their lives.

Happy Thanksgiving.

More to come.

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Tremors in the Universe by Robert Lyman Baittie

Giveaway ends December 23, 2014.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

Enter to win

Tremors in the Universe is available in e-book, paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2014 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie

Chapter 76. Wake up.

November 22, 2014

Each night, when I go to sleep, I die. And the next morning, when I wake up, I am reborn. ~Mahatma Gandhi

____

It starts somewhere deep inside me. Where exactly I’m unsure. The process of awakening—coming out of a nights slumber. I can’t quite put my finger on how it happens or what triggers it, but it’s as if there is a night watchmen inside the theater of my mind, whose job, besides maintaining the movie projector of my dreams, is also responsible for turning on the light in my brain once the late night feature has ended. The thing is, ever since Parkinson’s took over ownership of the cinema, he’s been working a much shorter shift.

The first thing I’m consciously aware of is that the adhesive holding my eyelids together, burns ever so slightly as I first start to pull them apart. What is that? When did the Sandman lose the account and get replaced by the 3M adhesive and Heinz vinegar guys?

5:18 a.m.

That’s what the clock says. But I know that’s not the real time. The real time? 4:18 a.m. You see, when the time change came this year—when you’re supposed to turn your clocks back one hour—Spring forward, Fall back—I neglected to do that. So my clock is still on the old time. It drives my wife crazy, but I love it because it forces me to do math immediately upon awakening. There’s no snooze bar once you’ve solved an equation.

So here I sit at 4:37 a.m. on a Saturday morning. Yes, a SATURDAY morning! Who’s up that early on Saturday? My kid’s are still a day away from waking up. Birds aren’t even up.

But you know what? I love it. It’s quiet. It is SO quiet.

Though my eyes are no longer closed, I’m still in the darkness—yet I can see. It’s a darkness that surprisingly doesn’t leave me blind. I can easily find my way. The darkness actually enhances the ability for me to be alone with myself and my thoughts. The rest of my outside world is still asleep and as such it makes it easier for me to be more aware of myself. There aren’t all the distractions of life. I’m conscious now but meditative at the same time. It’s the best of both worlds. There’s a wonderful joy I feel inside as the slow transition happens from darkness to light. If you REALLY pay attention there is a subtlety that is truly magical. It’s my opportunity to meet the new day and all its promise.

A spiritual awakening happens much the same way. It is allowing yourself to come out of the slumber of your life, but it starts with a willingness to sit in the darkness. By making the conscious choice to look within yourself and discover your true being—finding an acceptance of who and what you are—you will slowly be awakened by a growing light within you. Much like the rising sun on a new day. As we become more aware of ourselves, the light inside us continues to grow brighter and we begin to see our lives more clearly—our vision dramatically improves. With each journey into and through the darkness, comes a feeling of bliss as you become more enlightened. For myself, this elicited a feeling of, This is fun! But what I quickly came to understand was, that this was an energy gathering opportunity to dive deeper into the well of darkness. With each success you want to go further. With each challenge you conquer, you grow even braver.

What it means is, the darkness is not something to be dispelled. Returning to it over and over like sleep in the night offers us opportunity for even greater growth. With each moment we enter the darkness to discover ourselves we shine more and more light on personal understanding and acceptance until eventually the darkness melts away.

The irony is that in spiritually awakening yourself, you must learn to simultaneously embrace the light along with the dark. The two go hand in hand and are actually happening all the time together, although one usually tends to get more focus than the other. In the beginning the tendency is to focus on facing the darkness while still maintaining some hold on old beliefs and fears, but eventually one finds they can make the choice to embrace standing in their own light because they no longer have such a strong attachment to their old unhealthy attitudes that caused them so much unhappiness.

According to the National Parkinson Foundation, sleep problems are a fact of life for nearly 80 percent of all Parkinson’s patients—a small comfort to me when I am sitting at my computer at 4:30 in the morning. But what does offer me comfort is that my having Parkinson’s, in a roundabout way, forced me to learn how to see in the darkness. It has given me the chance to wake up and discover how to enjoy each and every day to its fullest. Parkinson’s was the catalyst that made me look inside myself—sit in the darkness—and discover a light. A light that keeps growing brighter and brighter inside me. I have to be grateful.

Don’t wait for a catalyst in your life. Take the opportunity now.

Wake up.

More to come.

Goodreads Book Giveaway


Tremors in the Universe
by Robert Lyman Baittie

Giveaway ends December 23, 2014.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

Enter to win

Tremors in the Universe is available in e-book, paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2014 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie

Chapter 75. TGIM.

November 9, 2014

Thank God It’s Monday!

When’s the last time you heard someone say that? It’s probably been quite a while and the reason is really quite simple: attitudes and expectations, and they both go hand in hand. If we don’t already have our own expectations of the work week ahead, with it’s pile of emails to return, or that project you put off on Friday and said “I’ll take care of that on Monday”, then we’re influenced by the attitudes of those around us—we hear so often how much others hate Monday, we figure we should hate it too. The bottom line is we’ve always heard Mondays are bad, so we expect them to be bad. And then you know what? They end up bad. But how are Mondays really any different than any other day of the week? They’re all made up of 24-hours. Each day is yours to make of it what you will. And it all depends on how you look at it. Take a positive perspective and it just might end up positive.

As a kid I used to love Mondays. Mondays meant the day I could get back to being with all my friends at school. My chance to socialize with those that didn’t live close by. My chance to have fun. As an adult I try and look at it the same way. There are a lot of fantastic people I see on Mondays that I don’t get to see on the weekends. And let’s be honest, weekends are highly overrated. I mean, how many people have you heard of that party their asses off on a Saturday night, and after waking up with the worst hangover on Sunday are greeted with breakfast in bed by singing parakeets and Victoria Secret model? And how about the extra congested traffic on Monday mornings? Did you ever stop to think why so many more people are on the road that day? It’s because they’re all excited to get to work. Shouldn’t you be? It’s definitely one way to look at it. And finally, if you allow yourself to start the week with negative thoughts, you’re choosing to alter your energy for the entire week. Why would you want to set yourself up for a lousy week when you don’t even know what’s ahead? Make the best of the day. Every day. One day at a time.

That’s been my approach for dealing with Parkinson’s—make the best of each day, every day, one day at a time. 

Along with a diagnosis of Parkinson’s disease, a chronic disease, or any other illness that challenges the mind, body and spirit, comes a host of expectations. Expectations that are quite often driven by the negative experiences and attitudes of others. It can be very easy for someone to quickly succumb to what a challenge is expected to be rather than simply accepting things as they are and letting their own individual attitude fashion the experience into what they want it to be.

From the very beginning I could have chose to see Parkinson’s as someone else’s experience—the experiences that are written about in medical journals and research papers. I probably don’t have to tell you, but those papers and journals don’t paint a very positive picture. So why would I want to start MY experience with PD based off of someone else’s negative thoughts? I didn’t want to alter my positive energy that I had, when I truly didn’t know what lay ahead. Does my experience with PD have to be someone else’s Monday morning? Absolutely not.

I chose to see my experience with Parkinson’s quite differently. I chose to see it as a challenge to overcome. Not a challenge with the disease itself, because Parkinson’s just is what it is—I’ve already accepted that—the challenge for me was all about my attitude and expectations. My challenge was not allowing myself to see any of the experience in a negative light. And it’s worked. Every day with Parkinson’s for me is no different than the rest. They’re all made up of 24-hours. Each day is my day to make of it what I will.

And tomorrow is going to be a fantastic day!

TGIP.

More to come.

Tremors in the Universe is now available in paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2014 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie

Chapter 74. Shaken, not deterred.

October 22, 2014

We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.

~Joseph Campbell

____

All my life I believed I could accomplish anything I set my mind to.

At thirteen years of age I decided that we needed dimmer switches installed throughout our house. I’d seen a James Bond movie where he dimmed the lights remotely while entertaining a beautiful, female spy, and well, I was a thirteen-year-old boy, and I just never knew when I might have the opportunity to entertain. So I got on my Schwinn Stingray bike, which was the closest thing I had to James Bonds’ Mercedes-Benz at the time, and I rode down to the neighborhood hardware store and picked up a set of five dimmer switches. Then, while my parents were out of the house (because that’s the only way they would have allowed me to install dimmer switches) I proceeded to turn off the main power, remove all the standard throw switches and wire in five new dimmers.

That evening as our family dined on meat loaf and green beans in the ambience of sunset incandescence, I had my chocolate milk with Bosco syrup “shaken, not stirred.”

That same can-do attitude I had in my youth, combined with a dash of fearlessness, followed me well into adulthood and instilled in me the confidence to start my own business at the age of 27—a graphic design and advertising agency that I still own and operate to this day some 27 years later. For me, it’s incredibly exhilarating to take some calculated risk and try to make a go of something—something that the next person might not think I am capable of. And if there isn’t anyone to doubt me, and instill that drive in me, then I’ll probably do it anyway just to prove to myself I can. If I manage to succeed, it’s a wonderful sense of accomplishment, and if I don’t, I chalk it up to a valuable learning experience.

But inevitably as soon as I figure it out, solve the problem or come up with a way to make it work, then I tend to start dreaming of the next undertaking, because for me, the excitement is in figuring out how to make something work. That’s just the creative in me.

And so it was with my design business.

For a number of years after turning it into a profitable and thriving business, I couldn’t help but dream of opening my next hot-dog stand. That’s what I’ve always called my personal venture ideas—hot dog stands—my little piece of independence to make a go of, or fail at trying. And my next hot dog stand was going to be a pizza restaurant.

I had it all planned out. I was going to retire to a sunny locale and return to a time when I was a much younger man: a time when I worked for a pizza restaurant in college named Papa Dels, a time when I brought a pizza up to the servers window to a newly hired waitress, and with all the bravado I could muster said, “Do you believe in love at first sight?” only to have her say, “Leave me alone. Today’s my first day and I just want to do a good job.” I eventually married her, so I guess even then, as I pretty much always have, saw my future as clear as day. 

I saw it all. But I never saw Parkinson’s.

With a diagnosis of Parkinson’s, I had to quickly adjust the vision I had of my life. The ability to successfully do that turned out to be a key factor in developing my positive attitude toward this newly acquired disease. I simply had surmised that I couldn’t be angry at something that was so totally out of my control.

Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned. ~The Buddha

While I never felt angry about being diagnosed with PD, I most definitely had intense feelings of frustration. How can I possibly plan for my future? How can I continue to envision a dream of owning and running a pizza restaurant or any hot dog stand for that matter, when I no longer have any guarantee about my future physical capabilities? What’s the use of having ANY plans when Parkinson’s isn’t going to let me in on what it’s plans are for me.

But you know what? Parkinson’s or not, there never were any guarantees in my life. Who was I kidding? Nothing had been taken away from me at all. Because nothing was ever a given.

Had I allowed myself to stay on my original train of thought where Parkinson’s was a frustration I would have solidified a belief that the disease was going to be an inconvenience—that I was now somehow marred and had imperfections which would sever my ability to accomplish anything I set my mind to. Instead, I began to sit with the idea that while Parkinson’s does not have to define me, it is a part of who I am, and I can make the choice to do something positive with the experience.

Our lives are fluid, and there are no rules as to how we have to react to each new experience we encounter. There are no rules as to what we can or cannot accomplish in life. With my diagnosis I could choose to live another’s reality of Parkinson’s disease, or I could choose to make and live my own reality. Sometimes letting go of a dream allows us to see better things waiting for us on the horizon.

I chose to shift my attention back to what I knew I really wanted to do—making my next hot dog stand a reality—only now I had a new challenge in mind—succeeding in life with Parkinson’s.

I’ve just about got that one figured out. Anyone for pizza?

More to come.

Tremors in the Universe is now available in paperback and hardcover through Balboa Press @ http://bookstore.balboapress.com/Products/SKU-000956591/Tremors-in-the-Universe.aspx

or at http://www.tremorsintheuniverse.com

A portion of the authors proceeds are being donated to the National Parkinson Foundation and the Michael J. Fox Foundation for Parkinson’s Research

Tremors in the Universe Copyright © 2014 by Robert Baittie

Follow me on Twitter @RobertBaittie