Tanya R. Simon's Blog, page 3
September 21, 2014
Who���s Selfish?
Artist Unknown
I think if one more person says anything to me about suicide being a selfish crime, I am going to start shrieking like a banshee and never, ever stop. Not understanding something as personal as suicide or judging someone who hurts enough to commit suicide, then opening up your maw about it, is the selfish crime.
Sure, there are those out there who do not give a thought to anyone other than themselves and do not love anyone other than themselves, who commit suicide and so in those rare instances it is done selfishly. However, for most people who even contemplate suicide, let alone actually attempt it, they are thinking of everyone, including themselves when the decision is made.
For all those who I just lost, let me explain it to you this way. When you are suicidal, you are at such a low point emotionally and spiritually that you feel as though your existence is causing those around you pain. The suicidal person thinks that they are harming those they love by making them watch day in and day out how much pain their loved one is in and not be able to help. So, the decision is made not only to stop the suicidal person from hurting, but to stop them from hurting those they love. In a way, it is the least selfish thing that the suffering person can think of doing.
I am not na��ve enough to belief that no one has ever said, ���I will kill myself just to hurt so and such!��� For most people this is nowhere close to what is going through their head. It is more akin to, ���I won���t be hurting so and such once I am gone.��� Which is why many suicidal people will not kill themselves at home or they will attempt to clean up the mess, or they choose a method that will leave minimal mess.
Mainly suicide is attempted or completed while the person is beyond anything resembling rational thought. The pain they are in robs them of the ability to think in a way that is outside of the moment they are in. They feel as though there are no other options. The counselling did not work, the meds did not help, the praying went unanswered, escaping into sleep stopped being an option because their racing minds no longer allow it and someone who they love is usually griping at them about how they are acting. All of this builds into a crescendo of unceasing agony and the only way they see of stopping it, is to escape into death. Believe it or not, where they will spend, eternity isn���t going through their minds or if it is, Hell seems better than where they are and they feel like the Devil is an old friend by this point.
I would not be at all surprised if successful suicides that are on their third or fourth attempt, don���t find themselves on the other side, amazed that they finally got it right and their dead. This might be why you so often hear ghost stories where the ghost tragically committed suicide. The ghost is in disbelief that the pain really is over, so they are waiting around for the punch line that seems to come with every major event in their lives. They might be waiting around for someone to jump out and say, ���Just goshing! You are alive and a vegetable!���
So, before you say aloud where anyone who may have once been or are currently suicidal can hear you. Stop, shut your mouth, and think. Yes, someone may already be gone by suicide but your careless words might just be the last straw to someone who is still here, still helpable, still fighting. You may be the trigger that starts them racing down that last track in the race to escape their pain. Because if you are already feeling like your are a bad person because you just cannot pull it together and you have had a day that was miserable and someone who you admired very much just died by suicide and you can barely handle the look of pity or panic in your loved ones eyes and��� Someone telling you that what you see as your only way out makes you a selfish person on top of everything else, might be enough for you to toss your hands up in the air and yourself off a cliff.
Tanya R. Simon
2014, All Rights Reserved.
Who’s Selfish?
Artist Unknown
I think if one more person says anything to me about suicide being a selfish crime, I am going to start shrieking like a banshee and never, ever stop. Not understanding something as personal as suicide or judging someone who hurts enough to commit suicide, then opening up your maw about it, is the selfish crime.
Sure, there are those out there who do not give a thought to anyone other than themselves and do not love anyone other than themselves, who commit suicide and so in those rare instances it is done selfishly. However, for most people who even contemplate suicide, let alone actually attempt it, they are thinking of everyone, including themselves when the decision is made.
For all those who I just lost, let me explain it to you this way. When you are suicidal, you are at such a low point emotionally and spiritually that you feel as though your existence is causing those around you pain. The suicidal person thinks that they are harming those they love by making them watch day in and day out how much pain their loved one is in and not be able to help. So, the decision is made not only to stop the suicidal person from hurting, but to stop them from hurting those they love. In a way, it is the least selfish thing that the suffering person can think of doing.
I am not naïve enough to belief that no one has ever said, “I will kill myself just to hurt so and such!” For most people this is nowhere close to what is going through their head. It is more akin to, “I won’t be hurting so and such once I am gone.” Which is why many suicidal people will not kill themselves at home or they will attempt to clean up the mess, or they choose a method that will leave minimal mess.
Mainly suicide is attempted or completed while the person is beyond anything resembling rational thought. The pain they are in robs them of the ability to think in a way that is outside of the moment they are in. They feel as though there are no other options. The counselling did not work, the meds did not help, the praying went unanswered, escaping into sleep stopped being an option because their racing minds no longer allow it and someone who they love is usually griping at them about how they are acting. All of this builds into a crescendo of unceasing agony and the only way they see of stopping it, is to escape into death. Believe it or not, where they will spend, eternity isn’t going through their minds or if it is, Hell seems better than where they are and they feel like the Devil is an old friend by this point.
I would not be at all surprised if successful suicides that are on their third or fourth attempt, don’t find themselves on the other side, amazed that they finally got it right and their dead. This might be why you so often hear ghost stories where the ghost tragically committed suicide. The ghost is in disbelief that the pain really is over, so they are waiting around for the punch line that seems to come with every major event in their lives. They might be waiting around for someone to jump out and say, “Just goshing! You are alive and a vegetable!”
So, before you say aloud where anyone who may have once been or are currently suicidal can hear you. Stop, shut your mouth, and think. Yes, someone may already be gone by suicide but your careless words might just be the last straw to someone who is still here, still helpable, still fighting. You may be the trigger that starts them racing down that last track in the race to escape their pain. Because if you are already feeling like your are a bad person because you just cannot pull it together and you have had a day that was miserable and someone who you admired very much just died by suicide and you can barely handle the look of pity or panic in your loved ones eyes and… Someone telling you that what you see as your only way out makes you a selfish person on top of everything else, might be enough for you to toss your hands up in the air and yourself off a cliff.
Tanya R. Simon
2014, All Rights Reserved.
September 13, 2014
Free Copy of The Choice!
September 6, 2014
This Present Garden of Pain
Coming Soon to these and other retailers! Look for it!
August 17, 2014
Lost In The Labyrinth
With Affection,
Tanya R. Simon
May 25, 2014
The Angel Hunts
Artwork by Michelle Monique of DeviantArt
The angel didn’t spend a lot of time trying to figure out why she was the way she was, she just went with the flow and embraced the differences between her and the herd. She usually could not work herself up to more than contempt for the average. At least the less than average had something unique working for them. And she loved to play with those who thought they were better than average. She lived for the rare occasion when she encountered one who could meet her on her level.
She looked around the throng of people gyrating to the thumping beat of what was currently called music. Her dead eyes took in the wolves on the make and the cougars on the prowl, dismissing them with a sniff of disdain. She finished off her one and only Sex On The Beach, the name always made what passed for a smile come briefly to her pouty lips. She slid an ice cube in her mouth as she began the hunt. Her gaze passing over the deer and sheep willingly caged in this place, every once and a while one of them would sense the malice and shiver briefly before shaking it off and going back to their meaningless lives.
There at a corner table, studying the crowd as though he too were hunting for worthy prey. His eyes met the angel’s for a moment and locked, he smiled, and cocked a dark eyebrow in invitation, kicking a chair out with his foot.
The angel stood and let the silk of her dress slither down her lush body and hug her curves. She smiled, the smile more a baring of her little sharp teeth, than an expression of pleasure, and sashayed her way through the writhing throng. She stood for a moment in front of his table, so he could look his fill at the perfection of her body. She pulled out a chair on the other side of the table from the one he had kicked out and sat down.
He threw his head back and laughed, the light catching momentarily in his dark, shoulder length hair. When he looked at her, his dark eyes were amused. He scooted closer to her and leaned over to whisper something wicked in her ear, to run his large, smooth hand down her curls, to brush his hand down her bare arm.
The angel ran her hand down his muscled thigh; she leaned in closer to him and whispered something equally naughty in his ear. She pulled back and watched his pupils dilate and heard his breathing catch and begin to race. The angel ran a finger around the neckline of her dress, stopping right at her cleavage. She flicked her tongue over her lips and leaned in to nibble lightly on his jaw.
He stood and held out his hand, the angel took it and let him pull her up and into him. Her prey kissed her hungrily, pushing his tongue into her mouth and cupping her bottom with his hands. She kissed him back and let her mind wander to all the wonderful things she would soon be doing to her prey. He took her hand and led her through the throng and out into the night. The angel looked up at the starry sky and wondered if the prey had any idea he would never see the sunrise.
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May 18, 2014
The Many Pitfalls and Pleasures of Social Media
I will be writing about different social media outlets and my experiences with them as an author. Which I have discovered is very different than using them as a regular person or as me vs. my brand. I have a poll that I would like you to take, which will enable me to put into my posts what other authors have found on their journeys to become known writers with books that sell.
I hope you will participate by taking the poll and at the end of June, I will post my results and hopefully we will help each other to navigate this very overpopulated and confusing cyberniche.
Thanks!
May 9, 2014
Unconditional
Never say you love unconditionally unless
You love every facet, every crevice
Unless you love both light and dark
If you do not embrace them when they are different
You love them with conditions
Studiously ignoring parts of the whole
Means loving only that which you can stick neatly into
Some predetermined box or cage
Pretending that words have never been said
Invalidates, wounds and demeans
Like peppering them with shrapnel
Refusing to celebrate their victories
Because they do not agree with what you want of them
Feels more like judging and denying
Than loving them despite their flaws
Unconditional love, loves someone including their flaws
Loves someone when they revel in the dark
When they are afraid of the light
Loving someone with all that you are
BECAUSE of all that they are.
Few people are capable of loving this completely
But I refuse to be loved in any other way
I will no longer support the lie
That you love me unconditionally
I will no longer hide parts of the whole
Because they make you uncomfortable
I will no longer be burned by the light
So that you can brag about how I came out of the dark
And if I spend my life alone
It will not be scared of loneliness
I will live it knowing that I traded no part of myself
For love that was not real
I will shed the occasional tear for all you missed out on
And in time I will not think of you at all
- Tanya R Simon, 2014
May 6, 2014
The Choice
You can now purchase the choice through Amazon Books:
The Kindle Store:
Barnes and Noble Online:
http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-choice-tanya-r-simon/1118953225?ean=9781495357442
Books A Million:
http://www.booksamillion.com/p/Choice/Tanya-R-Simon/9781495357442?id=5994044615272
Goodreads:
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21857978-the-choice?from_search=true
Alibris:
http://www.alibris.com/The-Choice-Tanya-R-Simon/book/26627828?matches=2
And many other online sources! Pick your copy up today!
