T.C. Avey's Blog, page 5

Blues to Bliss Book Review

I’m happy to announce my blogging friend, Ngina Otiende, has released her new book— Blues to Bliss:  Creating Your Happily-ever-after in the Early Years.
I wish I’d had this book before I got married (or shortly after I was married)…it would have hugely impacted my life, and marriage, in a GODLY way!
Our world, and society, view marriage from a vastly different standpoint than God does.
No matter if you grew up with a Christian example of marriage in your home or not, this book is for you because worldly standards for marriage influence us all too some degree.
The first few years of my marriage were rocky for two main reasons:
1.       I didn’t have a Biblical understanding of marriage. In fact, I liked to skip over passages of Scripture that dealt with marriage because I didn’t like to think about being “submissive” to my husband. My view of marriage and love was skewed by the world. I felt wives were undervalued in the Bible. This came because I didn’t understand God’s love for me.  Therefore I didn’t understand the love a husband and wife have and how our roles are to relate.  MY relationship with God was off and this made my relationship with my husband unstable.
2.      I wanted my husband to fill a place in my life that only God is meant to fill. I unknowingly placed on my husband a burden he was never meant to carry. He is not my savior and he cannot fill the role of God in my life. Again, MY relationship with God was off and this affected my marriage.
All of this confusion and heartache could have been avoided if I’d read Ngina’s book.
She does an excellent job of helping women realize these truths. Her book aids them in seeing their life with God, and with their husbands, from GOD’s POINT OF VIEW.
Whether you’re looking to be married soon, are a newlywed, or have been married 50+ years, this book has something to offer the Christian woman. 
As a bonus , if you purchase Blues to Bliss between February 2nd - February 6th 2015, you will receive two free gifts (in digital format) as thank you from Ngina Otiende:


1. A brand new 7-day Devotional for Wives 
2. A Love Check List - Scriptures on areas of struggle for earlywed wives.

To get the Devotional and Check List, simply email Ngina your receipt on blog@intentionaltoday.comand she will send you information on how to access the gifts. 
This is book would also make a great gift.
You can pick up your copy on Amazon by clicking here!


 "The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.”" Gen 2:18 NIV

"Ngina Otiende is the Author of the newly released book, "Blues to Bliss: Creating Your Happily-Ever-After In The Early Years". In the book she talks about her early marriage challenges and how God transformed their relationship through intentional effort and grace and how wives can change the dynamics of their marriage. Ngina blogs at IntentionalToday.com where she equips the early-wed wife with tools and resources to create intentional happily-ever-afters. Connect with Ngina on Facebook, and Pinterest "
Disclaimer: As part of the launch team I was given this  book and asked to give an honest review, which I have.

Are You Like Judas?

I’ve been thinking a great deal about Judas.
You know, the disciple who betrayed Jesus for 30 pieces of silver.
I’m not sure why he’s been on my mind, but his story has captivated me.
Perhaps it’s because I think many Christians today (me) resemble him…not that they actively seek ways to betray him, but many Christians spend years devoted to Him yet completely misunderstand  their Savior. They spend time at church and do “Christian” things, but they’ve never really met Him. They know facts about Him, but they’ve never actually experienced the freedom found in the cross.  His love and grace haven’t truly touched their hearts.   They’re missing out on the abundant life and they don’t even know it! 
Here are a few examples:
Even after saying the “sinner’s prayer” they still feel unloved. They still try and “earn” their Salvation…even if they don’t say it or realize it.  They’re bogged down in sin and feel helpless to change. They read the Bible but it doesn’t sink in. They’re lost in despair, believing the lies of this world. They feel unworthy, their prayers lack power, and their walk with Christ is shallow.
Without realizing it, these Christians (me) are like Judas.
Judas walked with God (Trinity) and still completely missed having a relationship with Him! So it’s not impossible to think that there are tons of Christians today making his same mistakes. 
But WHY did Judas betray Jesus? (Why do we betray Him?)
Judas experienced the same things the other disciples did. 
He saw Jesus feed the multitudes, heal the sick, rebuke demons, and confront the religious leaders. He heard Jesus pray, watched him calm the storm, and witnessed Him grant forgiveness and acceptance to those the rest of society had wrote off as “no good”. 
Despite all this, WHO Christ was never penetrated his heart.
How did I come to this conclusion????
Because after he realized he’d messed up, he tried to correct the problem like most humans do. He went to those he’d taken the money from and tried to give it back. He wanted to make things right. He felt bad for what he’d done. The need to repent nagged at him.
But instead of going to God and asking for forgiveness, he went to man.
When man couldn’t ease his pain, take away his guilt, or make things right, he again turned to worldly solutions—not God’s grace.
He hung himself. 
Tragic.
He’d witnessed Jesus forgive everyone, of every sin they came at Him with, yet he didn’t think Jesus could forgive him. 
I wonder, do we think God can’t truly forgive us? Is that why we behave as we do?
I read a post by blogger Chris Martin about Jesus healing Malchus’ ear when it was chopped off in the Garden of Gethsemane (Luke 22:47-53). (check out his post by clicking his name, it’s awesome)
Again, Judas was there. 
He witnessed Jesus heal the ear of a man who came to arrest him.
He witnessed unmerited grace.
While Chris’ post focuses on the impact that must have had on the Roman Solider, I pondered why it didn’t have more of an effect on Judas.
I wonder if Jesus wasn’t only showing Malchus His love, but also trying to demonstrate one last time to Judas that He will forgive anything—even attacks on His life. 
Judas missed the lesson. He observed grace in action …but he didn’t apply it to his own life. 
How about you? 
Is God trying to tell you something, trying to teach you something? 
Are you missing out on God’s best because you’re unable, or unwilling, to see the offering of love being presented to you by God?
Please, dear reader, don’t be Judas. 
Don’t be an acquaintance of God’s…KNOW Him.
I encourage you: be like Peter. He denied Jesus 3 times yet his sorrow lead him back to Jesus—not further away (John 21:7-19).  He came back to Christ because he KNEW Christ, he’d seen Christ’s love and he couldn’t stay away—even if it meant having to admit he was wrong.
Peter had a relationship with God. 
I pray you do too.
That way, when trials come or when you mess up (because we all do), you can go to God for the solution and not try and fix things yourself.
Only in Him is true pardon found. 
“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:9 NIV
You either believe that verse or you don’t. No middle ground.

CONGRATS! Kari Scare is the commenter from last weeks post who won an ebook copy of "While I'm Waiting" by Laura Hodges Poole!

While I'm Waiting: Book Review and GIVE AWAY!

I’m blessed this New Year to be on a few awesome book launch teams!
Today I’m happy to bring you a wonderful devotional, While I’m Waiting: Going from despair to hope while praising God and choosing contentment during trials , by Laura Hodges Poole. 
 
While I’m Waiting is awesome for the busy Christian who longs to dig deeper in their walk with God but has limited time for long winded chapters. 
Laura does an excellent job of getting straight to the heart of the matter. You won’t find yourself bored or pressed for time because While I’m Waiting is divided into short, easy to read chapters with reflection questions that will enable you to analyze your thoughts, emotions, and beliefs as they relate to the Word of God and the circumstances you’re currently encountering.
She uses stories from her past to bring enlightenment on how God’s Word can be applied to everyday life. Often Christians struggle between reading God’s Word and applying it to their own circumstances. Laura helps the reader connect the dots between theology and application especially during times of trial.
This book is meant to be used in conjunction with a journal. Journaling can bring fresh insight into stale problems and uncover layers of strongholds that prevent us from being content in our walk with God. 
Life can be hard. But God’s Word can bring not only deliverance, but also praise and hope during our times of waiting. 
If you feel as if you’ve hit a brick wall in your walk with God, or even if you’re on the mountaintop, this book is a great addition to be added to your reading list for 2015. It’s short, practical, and packs a punch…especially for the busy Christian. 
While I’m Waiting is available at Amazonin ebook format for $0.99. Laura hopes to have it in print in the near future. 
BONUS: Laura is giving away ONE free ebook copy to a random commenter. Winner will be announced next week. Just leave a comment below to enter (and tweeting about it is greatly appreciated as well).  Click to Tweet: "While I’m Waiting" by @Laura_Poole is awesome for the busy Christian who longs to walk with God but has limited time. Available on Amazon
Disclaimer: This book was provided to me for an honest review which I have gladly given.

Fake it till you Make it: How to regain Focus

I have a confession:
My focus is off.
I sit down to read my Bible, pray, or even worship my Creator and my mind drifts. 
This doesn’t normally happen to me.
Usually I can push past any distractions and spend time with God.
But lately I’m struggling to give God one minute of my undivided attention.   
I’ve spent time trying to analyze “why” I’m having the inability to center my heart and mind on God, but I find I can’t even concentrate on that for longer than thirty seconds. (Perhaps it’s because I’m pregnant and really tired)
So instead of forcing myself to “figure out why” I’m having this dilemma, and rather than give up until my mind decides to cooperate, I’ve decided to adopt the old adage: “Fake it till you make it ”.
This is where having established discipline comes in.
Discipline keeps me returning to God, even though it feels like an exercise in futility. 
Discipline prompts me to “go through the motions”.
While this may sound contrary to a good relationship, I think it’s quite the opposite. 
I’m still committed to God.
I still long to spend time with Him.
I still WANT to hear His voice and feel His presents.
I don’t’ know “why” I’m having difficulty being in His presents since my heart longs to be near Him, but I’m not going to waste my energy (and limited mental capacity) trying to figure out the logic behind all this. 
And I’m not going to “give up”. 
I’m not going to feel like a failure or believe the lie that it’s a waste of my time to read my Bible when I can’t remember anything five minutes later.
I’m NOT going to “Take time off” from serving God and obeying Him. I’m NOT going to “take a day off” from being in a relationship with my Savior (click to tweet). 
While I may not FEEL like I’m accomplishing anything, I trust that I am not wasting my time…or God’s.
My focus may be skewed right now, but my heart is still committed to God.
So until my focus returns, I’ll continue to “fake it till I make it”.
I’m so thankful for the discipline I’ve cultivated over the years. 
I have a strong feeling that without that discipline I would be tempted to “take time off” and turn my focus to things that make me feel like I’ve used my time more “wisely”.
But thank God He doesn’t view wisdom or productivity as we do. He knows our hearts, our motives, our humanness, our thoughts…nothing is hidden from Him. 
I can’t lie to Him.
He knows my focus is off, but He also knows I long for my focus to be centered on Him. 
To Him, I’m not “faking” it; I’m simply continuing to discipline my body/mind to seek Him even when I don’t feel like it. 
Psalm 139 NIV
“You have searched me, Lord, and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you, Lord, know it completely. You hem me in behind and before, and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me,” even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand—when I awake, I am still with you. If only you, God, would slay the wicked! Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty! They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord, and abhor those who are in rebellion against you? I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies. Search me, God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”

Learning to Listen to God

I’m reading Secrets of the Secrete Place by Bob Sorge and one thing that stands out is his revelation about LISTENING to God. 
Everything in our lives hangs on our ability to LISTEN to God.
How can we answer the invitation to Grace if we don’t listen to the initial call of Salvation? 
How can we know God’s purpose for our lives if we don’t listen to His voice?
How do we know what HE wants for us if we don’t listen to His directives? 
Over and over in the Scriptures we read of God instructing His people to LISTEN.
I’ll be honest, listening isn’t my strongest discipline.
I’m better at praise/worship, prayer, Bible reading…even fasting.
Not so good at pausing to listen to what God has to say. 
Yes, He speaks to me in His Holy Word….but I’m starting to think (Holy Spirit promptings here) that there’s more to listening than what I’m currently doing. 
While this could intimidate me (I’m a doer and not very good at being inactive and silent), instead I feel peace.
I know there will be a HUGE learning curve, that God will be patient with me.
Listening, like all Godly disciplines, takes time and practice.
I won’t be “good” at it at first, but that doesn’t mean it’s impossible for me.
In fact, as I’ve been seeking God on how to “Listen better” He brought me to Luke 17:5-10 NIV, 
“The apostles said to the Lord, “Increase our faith!”

He replied, “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will obey you.

“Suppose one of you has a servant plowing or looking after the sheep. Will he say to the servant when he comes in from the field, ‘Come along now and sit down to eat’?  Won’t he rather say, ‘Prepare my supper, get yourself ready and wait on me while I eat and drink; after that you may eat and drink’?  Will he thank the servant because he did what he was told to do? So you also, when you have done everything you were told to do, should say, ‘We are unworthy servants; we have only done our duty.’”

Here we see the apostles asking Jesus how they can increase their faith.
LISTEN to His answer: 
OBEY.
Just do what you know to do. Don’t worry about the things you don’t know. 
Do the small things…then you’ll get bigger things.
Obey in the things you know and more responsibility (faith) will be added to you. And don’t assume you deserve more faith, can “earn” it, or that there’s a magic formula to obtain it. 
Just be a servant. 
Obey. 
Now I’m not certain how obeying will necessarily increase my faith.
But if Jesus said it will, then I can take it to the bank.
How does this correspond to me learning how to listen?
Simple, I must do what I know to do.
Start there.
Don’t worry about” HEARING THE VOICE OF GOD” or gaining amazing revelations the first time I set aside ten minutes to listen. Don’t worry that I only have ten minutes. Don’t worry if thousands of thoughts bombard me and distract me. Don’t worry if this discipline doesn’t come “naturally” to me.
Start small. 
My faith, and my listening skills, will grow—just like the mustard seed grows.
My point:
Listen to whatever it is God is telling you to do. He wants to increase your faith and build up your relationship with Him.
Don’t sweat the small stuff.
Don’t worry about the details.
Just obey the parts you do know. 
The rest we can leave in God’s hands to reveal to us as we grow.
Have a blessed day and please, take a moment to listen to God.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” John 3:16 NIV (emphasis mine)
As we rush toward Christmas and a New Year, I pray the marvel of a loving God sending His only son to die for ALL your mistakes, sins and every indulgence of your flesh grips your heart and changes your life.
I pray your soul resonates with this passage:
“For the Lord your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great God, mighty and awesome, who shows no partiality and accepts no bribes. ” Deu 10:17 NIV
I pray you truly know Him as your Lord, God, and Savior. 
Don’t just know OF Him, but know HIM. 
I know of several Hollywood celebrities, but I don’t personally KNOW them. I can’t call them. I don’t email them and I certainly don’t celebrate birthdays with them. I’m not invited to important events in their lives and they don’t care to come to mine.  We don’t know each other, no matter how many facts I know about them. I don’t know them. 
This same analogy applies to God.
Please, don’t let another Christmas go by without KNOWING who Christ is. Without allowing Him fully into your life. 
He’s mighty. He’s awesome. 
He shows no partiality—so it doesn’t matter how awesome you are. Likewise, it doesn’t matter how “bad” you are. We’re all equal in His eyes. That makes me want to sing JOY TO THE WORLD!
Also, we can’t bribe Him—good news for poor people (me). 
He’s done the work for us. 
He sent His son, Jesus.
Jesus died for EVERY sin then rose from the grave, conquering sin and death. 
All you have to do is believe.
“ That if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. ” Romans 10:9 NKJV
That’s all there is to it.
Please dear reader, take these verses to heart and let them transform your life. 
A New Year is coming…but no one is promised tomorrow.
So while you can, embrace the gift of God this Christmas. 
“For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders.  And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.” Isaiah 9:6 NIV (emphasis mine)
Merry Christmas and Blessings from God this New Year.
I’ll be back January 2015.

Communicating with our Kids: Interview with Caleb Suko, Part 2

This is part 2 of the interview with Caleb from Sukofamily.org, author of What If… How to Kill Worry and Anxiety Before They Kill You about communicating tough realities with our children. If you missed last week, I urge you to go back and read his responses- they’re powerful!
Now let’s jump into the interview:
1.       Do you think Americans are hurting their children by not talking to them about what is happening to others around the globe, why or why not? How can they talk with their kids about these events and yet shelter them? How can we provide stability and knowledge?
If you want your child to be thankful, compassionate and unselfish then “yes!” I mean let’s face it ,99% of the kids in America are blessed materially. I understand that there are other problems like abuse and I don’t want to down play that.  However, I think it’s vital to give our children a sense of the global community, to know that if you have parents who live with you and you have a roof over your head and shoes on your feet then you’re doing better than millions of other kids out there!
I think parents need to do more than talk, they need to show. If possible take your kids to places where people are not as well off. Have them help in outreaches for orphans or the homeless. Take them on a short mission trip. Expose them to the needy and talk with them about ways they can help.
2.       It seems to me that there are many Christians lulled into a false sense of security. In 2 Tim 3we are told that, “everyone who wants to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted,” While not every Christian will be beheaded or imprisoned, those who long to live a godly life in Christ will face some sort of persecution. Do you think that by sheltering our kids from other Christian’s persecutions we are not preparing them for the potential realities they could face?
I think it’s a different perspective that we as parents need to have. Yes, we want to protect our children from unnecessary harm but ultimately that’s not our goal as parents. Ultimately, I want my children to be willing to risk all for the sake of righteousness.  I want them be ready to sacrifice their comfort and safety for the sake of another’s, I want them to understand that living for Christ could be dangerous but in the end it’s worth it!
3.       That’s inspiring, Caleb. It takes Spiritual Maturity in the parents to come to such a place as you and your wife are in order to raise kids with such a selfless mindset. Your maturity is being enhanced as daily you have to trust God to not only provide for you and your family, but also to keep you all safe from various forms of danger and death. Explain how the tragic events going on around your children are shaping who they are. Likewise, tell us how parents can be a positive influence during such difficult times.
I try not to underestimate the power my life and my wife’s life has on our children. They watch how we react to these events, they can sense when we are nervous, anxious or angry. I think our responses as parents have a huge impact. It’s hard to say exactly how these events are shaping them; it may be something that we will not clearly see in their lives until years later.
My advice to parents is to pay close attention to how you personally respond to tragedy and difficult situations, and then allow your children to look into your life. Talk it over with them; don’t be afraid to tell them that you don’t know what’s going to happen next but make sure they understand and that they see in you a strong faith that is unwavering regardless of the circumstances.
4.       What advice do you have for adults who don’t like to face these realities? How can they prepare themselves and also communicate with their kids?
I don’t think anyone really likes to face the realities of war, death and disease! The only way I know how to prepare yourself is by daily stretching your faith and strengthening your relationship with Jesus! Also don’t avoid difficult tasks you feel God is calling you to do. There will always be trials in your life, face them with God at your side because each one is preparing you for something else God has in store.
Communicating with your kids has to be ongoing. Don’t wait for tragedy to hit. Start now and make it part of the daily routine. Discuss the events of our lives and of the world around them and help them to see it in light of God’s Word.
5.       As we wrap up this interview I’m reminded of Esther 4:14, “For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father's family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?" If you could go back to this summer, when you were still “safe” in America, would you make a different decision regarding returning to the Ukraine? Would you have stayed here in order to shelter your kids from what they are experiencing? Explain. 
Absolutely not! In fact, I can’t really say I feel any safer at this point in American than I do in Ukraine. What people don’t realize is that “safe” is often much more a feeling then it is a reality. Most people take great physical risk every day just by driving to work! I’d just rather take that risk here in Ukraine, while preaching the Gospel and ministering to God’s people!
Thank you, Caleb, for taking the time to answer these tough and in-depth questions. I know your answers spoke volumes to me as a parent. I pray God continues to use you and your family and protect you all in the days to come.

Thanks for shining His light and being about His Kingdom.

God bless.

Communicating with our Kids: Interview with Caleb Suko, Part 1

I’m pausing my series on Hindrances to Becoming Like Christ to bring you a two part interview with Caleb from Sukofamily.org, author of What If… How to Kill Worry and Anxiety Before They Kill You. 
Caleb and his wife are missionaries, and parents, in the Ukraine. Their lives are much different than the average American Christian—for starters, they have to think about evacuation plans if the war comes closer to their home. They also have to raise their kids in a violent and unstable society that is undergoing massive change.
If you’re a parent or someone in a youth leadership position—and even if you’re not—I highly encourage you to read this two part interview.
This message is important as things around the globe are becoming more unstable.
Many argue we are living in the “last days”. 
Likewise, others denounce that, saying there have always been times like these. 
There has always been murder, war, hatred, adultery, pornography, drugs, slavery, etc.
However, I contend that there has never been a time exactly like this: A time when children have instant access to knowledge through social media and technology.
Adults exert so much effort sheltering kids from certain realities (such as the beheadings of Christians in the Middle East and the war in Ukraine) but we almost passively allow our children to be bombarded with messages of sex, drugs, and violence in the form of “entertainment”.
It’s ironic and it’s making our children unprepared for the harsh realities of this world and what is coming.
I cannot say with certainty that America will have another 9/11 event, that there will be a draft  like in Vietnam, that we will experience another Great Depression, or that we are headed to WWIII. 
But I can tell you there are places in our world that are experiencing events similar to these. 
There are children who face uncertainties that many American’s think “could never happen here.”
But we are wrong.
It can happen anywhere. At anytime.
Now, on to the interview:
1.        A few months ago America commemorated the 13th Anniversary of the 9/11 terrorists attacks. As I thought back on that day and I looked at events currently transpiring around the globe, my heart was sad. I was also shocked to realize a generation of kids is being raised with little awareness of that tragic day. We shelter them from seeing the videos of planes flying into the twin towers and people jumping from the buildings. To top it off, we seem to have a “hushed” mentality of how we speak about it, leaving our kids in the dark about what that day meant. And I’m frustrated by how hard it is to filter our kids from so called “entertainment”. I have to admit, I’m struggling to find a balance between sheltering my kid and knowing how much information to give. Can you give some insight on your thoughts on this?
My wife and I simply try not to go out of our way to hide things like death from our kids. We also don’t go out of our way to expose them to it. I have always felt that American culture has a very skewed view of death. On the one hand children see killing in movies, games and on tv daily and on the other hand they have probably never seen someone die and if they did go to a funeral, it’s not likely that it was open casket.
In many parts of the world, when a family member dies, the body is in the home and it’s the family that deals with it. This may not be pleasant but it is healthy for our understanding of death and it does help people through the grieving process.
2.        Caleb, you were on furlough in America when the fighting began heating up in the Ukraine. Yet you and your family decided to return there despite the dangers. How did you speak to your children about your decision?
Honestly, it wasn’t even something that really came up. Our main concern was, “what do we do if we can’t go back?” We have family in Odessa, so we’d been talking with them on Skype regularly and no one in our family felt any reservations about going back.
Once we got back we did talk with the kids about what would happen if the war started moving in our direction. I wanted them to know that we did have a plan so that they wouldn’t be surprised if it came to that.
3.       When I wrote my book, “The Precipice” I used modern events as the foundation for my fictional stories. Yet as I read your blog, I feel as if my book is coming to life before my very eyes! You posted recently about another church being seized by armed men, about an elderly church member being killed during a supposed “cease fire”, staggering accounts such as:  70% of the Church fleeing, people going hungry and a pregnant mother dying protecting the life of her other child, as well as about a good friend of yours being drafted into the military. Life is changing fast in the Ukraine. There’s no way to shelter your 5 kids from this information. How do you and your wife communicate with them?
One thing we don’t do is we don’t sit and watch the news about Ukraine all day. There was a period a couple of months ago when things were escalating very fast and I started spending too much time on the news sites. I began to feel that it was wearing me out and I made a decision that I just couldn’t do that anymore.
I check the news now once or twice a day online and that’s it. If things are heating up we talk with the kids about it around the dinner table. Sometimes they come home with questions because their friends have told them something, so we try to deal with that as it comes.
We also spend time as a family praying for Ukraine and I think that’s one of the most important things we do. I want our kids to realize that ultimately God is still on the throne.
4.       That’s powerful, Caleb. Praying with your kids about the Ukraine, letting them hear you petition God and trust Him through prayers with things that are unsettling. I can see how that is very important. Can you tell us about the fears your kids have with the unstable world around them and how you and your wife address it.
Believe it or not they’re pretty much regular kids and they don’t seem to be too bothered by the war at this point. Last month we crossed the border from Ukraine into Moldova on the way to a conference, the kids had fun counting the army tanks we saw.
5.       That’s mind blowing to me as an American! How normal things like tanks can become to daily life, yet through various historical books I know that is a very normal occurrence. You mention in one blog post that during times of war, priorities change. Tell us about how your family’s life has changed because of the events transpiring around you. Both the good and bad.
The one word that comes to my mind is “focus.” Whenever tragic events like this occur in the world around you it forces you to focus on those things that are most meaningful and on those things that you know will last even if your home and life as you know it are destroyed.
The other major difference is in planning. No one here is planning long term. Of course, that can be good and bad. The good part is that it simplifies life for you; the bad part is that certain things just won’t happen without long term planning.
Join us next week as we continue this interview.

Hindrances to Becoming like Christ, Part 6: Ungrateful Hearts

“Give thanks to the Lord , for he is good;
    his love endures forever.” Psalm 107:1 NIV
This is one of many passages that instruct us to THANK God because HE IS GOOD!
As I reflect upon this Thanksgiving season I’m wondering how THANKFUL we are.
I wonder:
Have we forgotten God’s goodness?
Do we overlook His loving provisions?
Are we undervaluing His blessings?
Do we think WE’VE accomplished things without Him?
Have we forgotten that all we have is FROM Him? (I’m not saying we don’t work hard, but everything—even our abilities, strength, jobs, and talents come from Him. Outside of Him we can do nothing)
Are we truly THANKFUL?
It’s hard for me to see grateful hearts as people rush from Halloween straight into Christmas—almost completely bypassing Thanksgiving. Maybe I wouldn’t feel this way if people were rushing to celebrate the birth of Christ, instead of obtaining material goods.
It’s like Thanksgiving is an unwanted and underappreciated holiday.
I can’t help but think that our culture is like this because we’ve forgotten to be GRATEFUL.
As a society we focus so much on what we DON’T have, and what we WANT to have, that we forget to set aside time to be THANKFUL for what we DO have. 
As Christians we shouldn’t need a holiday to remind us to be thankful, but since we do have this holiday, why are we not showing the world what it means to be truly thankful?
As I type this, its 14 days till Thanksgiving, 15 days till BLACK FRIDAY, and already people are lining up outside stores for the “special buys” offered to entice people to spend money they don’t have on stuff they don’t need (this is not a dis on those who do black Friday shopping, so please don’t take it that way).
For 15 days people are going to stand in line for material goods?
I can’t wrap my mind around it.
First, I wonder how they get off work for that long…or if they work. I mean, who can devote that much time to standing in line?
Next, I wonder if they’d stand in line to go to church? 
(To be honest, I’m not sure I’d stand in line that long for either.) 
I also wonder what is so good of a deal that they through the ordeal of standing in line for days on end. Do they really need an item that badly or is it just for “fun”? 
That people do stand in line that long for material goods makes me think we, as a society, are far too focused on material goods.  
So I’m asking you:
Are you already thinking more about Christmas than Thanksgiving?
If so, are you thinking of the birth of our Savior or about buying gifts and/or receiving gifts?
How can you not only be more thankful but show that gratitude to others? 
I can’t help but think that in order for our culture to change, for our kids to learn Gratitude, that the Body of Christ must first learn to GIVE THANKS TO THE LORD, FOR HE IS GOOD.
Christians are to be in the world, but not of the world (John 15:19 & 17:14, James 4:4, 1 John 2:15 & 4:5, 1 Cor 5:9-10, 2 Cor 4:18 & 5:6, Eph 2:19, 1 Peter 2:11, Rom 12:2, Psalm 119:19, etc).
That means, we shouldn’t be acting like the rest of the world.
I challenge you to ask yourself where your focus is.
If it’s not aligned with God, I pray you take time to find a grateful heart.
The Bible says a tree is known by its fruit (Luke 6:44-45, Matt 12:44, Proverbs 4:23)
What’s your fruit this holiday season?
Hint: your focus will point you to where your heart is and what type of fruit you're producing. 
Happy Thanksgiving. BTW: I’m grateful to you for reading my blog. See you in Dec.

Hindrances to Becoming Like Christ, Part 5: Downplaying God’s Word

Kingdom Building.
Simply put: we are either working toward building God’s Kingdom or our own. 
Jesus says, " Anyone who isn't with me opposes me, and anyone who isn't working with me is actually working against me ” Matt 12:30 NLT (emphasis mine throughout)
You might be thinking, “I go to church, I volunteer, I tithe, I’m not building my own Kingdom more than God’s.”
But God is showing me ways we (me) ARE building our kingdoms more than His.
In Luke 14:33Jesus says, “ So therefore, any one of you who does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple.”   In this verse Jesus is telling HIS FOLLOWERS to renounce, give away, forsake, and say “goodbye” to the things that possess them otherwisethey CANNOT be His disciples. (No minced words there, pretty straight forward)
There are things we all hold onto (technology, check book, drivers license/pass ports, etc). Possessions we all hold dear (cars, homes, boats, cell phones, etc.). Titles we are all proud of (mom, daughter, graduate, etc) People we love more than life itself (children, parents, siblings, etc).
All these are good things. Gifts from God. 
God wants us to enjoy life, to love others, to work hard, to take care of our possessions.
He does NOT want those possessions, gifts, or people to OWN us.
EVERYTHING and EVERYONE belong to Him.
They are in our lives by His will, His grace, and are on “loan” to us. He gave them and He can take them away ("Naked I came from my mother's womb, and naked I will depart. The LORD gave and the LORD has taken away; may the name of the LORD be praised.” Job 1:21 NIV)
We cannot hold onto them so tightly that we elevate them higher than God, refusing to let them go, refusing to trust God with them, refusing to praise God more than the things/people in our lives.
"If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters--yes, even their own life--such a person cannot be my disciple .” Luke 14:26 NIV  Strong’s Concordance defines “hate” in this verse as “loving less” or having a preference for one over another.
Again, these are strong words by Christ.
He is saying nothing, and no one, can come before our devotion to Him. 
His Kingdom, His will, MUST come over our own.
That isn’t the only place Jesus tells His disciples this harsh reality. 
Matt 6:24Jesus says to those who want to follow Him, "No one can serve two masters. Either you will hate the one and love the other, or you will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.”
You cannot be holding onto your Kingdom and think you can squeeze into God’s. 
Very plainly, Jesus says you CANNOT serve 2 masters, you CANNOT be His disciple if you don’t love Him more than everything/everyone else, you CANNOT be His follower if you don’t renounce the things that hold onto you.
Matt 7:14, Jesus tells CHRISTIANS, “But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.” 
A few verses later Jesus says, "Not everyone who says to me, 'Lord, Lord,' will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.” Matt 7:21 NIV
How much plainer can He say it? 
The way to heaven is narrow. There are tons of wonderful things in this life, things HE gives you—that satan distorts—that will get in your way of your devotion to Him.
 “Then Jesus said to His disciples,“If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me.” Matt 16:24 NKJV  Over and over Jesus is telling His church to DENY themselves. Deny their flesh. Deny the pull possessions have. Deny the lie that says you can “have it all”. 
You cannot live with one foot in the doorway to heaven and one foot in the world. In Rev 3:16 Jesus says He will vomit those people (luke warm Christians) from His mouth. 
It’s time we take God at His Word.
Stop downplaying, distorting, or outright ignoring His Word.

Enjoy life. Enjoy His blessings. But DO NOT let them own you. You were bought at a very high price. You're life is NOT your own. (1 Cor 7:23)
I encourage you to ask yourself, “Do I downplay the meaning of these verses? Do I believe everything He says? Do I justify certain aspects of my life so that I don’t feel the sting of His Words?” 
Lastly: Congrats Betty! You won a copy of “A Christmas Chance” by Laura Hodges Poole.Betty, I don't have your email address, could you please email, tnc(dot)avey(at)gmail(dot)com, me so I can get your info to Laura? Thanks.