T.C. Avey's Blog

Update: My Crazy Life & God's Amazing Blessings

When I published my last post I had a vague idea of what God had in store for me and my family...But God's plans were bigger, better and way more challenging than my finite brain could imagine. 
Last year my husband and I began the process to foster. This came after months of prayer. Honestly we were scared to obey. But God was relentless.  After months of looking for loop holes to avoid obeying (because some times God asks us to do things we feel ill equip to do. Fostering was waaay outside my comfort zone), we finally complied. 
Shortly after the new year God brought us a precious baby. My world shifted, my heart grew and I couldn't feel more blessed.
I also still feel ill equip for this challenge. Daily my trust in God is tested and my faith shakes. 
Where this road will go I do not know...only God does. I know what my momma's heart wants.
But nothing about this is about me. Nor is anything in my control. 
So I am trusting God. Resting in Him.Clinging to His promises.And asking for prayers for us all.May God's will be done. 
So that's what is going on in my world. What's new in yours?

A Hopefilled CHRISTmas- reflecting on last year and saying goodbye

When I began this year with the series Building a Framework of Hope I had no idea it would turn into a YEAR long sequence of posts.
Little did I know what God had in store for me. What He wanted to teach me.
You see, these posts were just as much for me as they were for you.
2017 will not go down as the “Best year of my life” or even come close to it.
If I had to put a label on it, I would say 2017 has been the “MOST challenging year of my life”. 
I have been tested, refined, beaten down, shaken, and turned upside down. 
As this year comes to a close I must confess, my world has shifted and I have been redefined. I am still struggling to know who I am and what my role is in this new “norm” called my life. 
But one thing I can say with certainty: I have HOPE.
My foundation suffered a brutal beating this past year, but my Hope stayed secure. 
His Word, His promises, kept me safe in Him. 
Abiding in Him.
Resting in Him.
Learning that I am not alone.
He is always with me.
I don’t know how your year has gone, but I pray you know Who to cling to when storms come your way.
I pray this series blessed you in some way.
While it barely scratches the surfaces of learning to Hope in Him, I pray it’s at least a jumping off point for you. That as you enter 2018, you can build upon your foundation in Christ and mature in Him.
I’m not certain I will blog in 2018. I am still seeking God about that.
May HIS will, and not my own, be done.
Merry CHRISTmas dear Believer.
I pray you have a joyous time celebrating the birth of our Savior and a blessed 2018. 
Perhaps we will meet again in the blogging sphere.
“but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31 NIV

A Hopefilled CHRISTmas- relecting on last year and saying goodbye

When I began this year with the series Building a Framework of Hope I had no idea it would turn into a YEAR long sequence of posts.
Little did I know what God had in store for me. What He wanted to teach me.
You see, these posts were just as much for me as they were for you.
2017 will not go down as the “Best year of my life” or even come close to it.
If I had to put a label on it, I would say 2017 has been the “MOST challenging year of my life”. 
I have been tested, refined, beaten down, shaken, and turned upside down. 
As this year comes to a close I must confess, my world has shifted and I have been redefined. I am still struggling to know who I am and what my role is in this new “norm” called my life. 
But one thing I can say with certainty: I have HOPE.
My foundation suffered a brutal beating this past year, but my Hope stayed secure. 
His Word, His promises, kept me safe in Him. 
Abiding in Him.
Resting in Him.
Learning that I am not alone.
He is always with me.
I don’t know how your year has gone, but I pray you know Who to cling to when storms come your way.
I pray this series blessed you in some way.
While it barely scratches the surfaces of learning to Hope in Him, I pray it’s at least a jumping off point for you. That as you enter 2018, you can build upon your foundation in Christ and mature in Him.
I’m not certain I will blog in 2018. I am still seeking God about that.
May HIS will, and not my own, be done.
Merry CHRISTmas dear Believer.
I pray you have a joyous time celebrating the birth of our Savior and a blessed 2018. 
Perhaps we will meet again in the blogging sphere.
“but those who hope in the Lord
    will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
    they will run and not grow weary,
    they will walk and not be faint.” Isaiah 40:31 NIV

To be Thankful- Building a FrameWork of Hope: Part 14

It’s my prayer that this 10 month long series has both challenged and inspired you to find your identity, and your hope, in Christ alone.
He alone is a sure foundation to build upon.
Remember, in a world of uncertainty, He NEVER changes (Heb 13:8)
As we approach Thanksgiving, I pray you take time to reflect upon all the blessings in your life and Thank God for each of them (Phil 4:8).
I pray you also make time to evaluate the trials and setbacks in your life and seek to learn from them. Ask God to show you where He was during these dark times and what He wants you to know. Ask Him to teach you, heal you and refine you. 
Being refined isn’t fun.
But it is a blessing. 
Hard times are opportunities to yield to God’s design in your life, to trust Him more, to know the power and depth of His love.
Nothing can separate you from His love. 
“For I know that nothing can keep us from the love of God. Death cannot! Life cannot! Angels cannot! Leaders cannot! Any other power cannot! Hard things now or in the future cannot! The world above or the world below cannot! Any other living thing cannot keep us away from the love of God which is ours through Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:38-39 NLV
I pray that as you set your sights on this upcoming year (2018) that you will embrace any hardships that come your way. That you don’t waste your time or energy trying to fight against God’s plan for you and that you don’t wish your life away by comparing yourself to others or longing for a different set of circumstances to make you happy or give you peace.
True happiness, peace, and joy are not found in a set of circumstances but in the arms of a Savior (John 16:33).
Please don’t view trials as punishment from God. He is not against you. He is for you.
“There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” John 15:13 NLT
He’s already laid down His life for you…will you lay down yours for Him?
Will you trust Him with your pain…or continue to rely upon your own understanding? 
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Prov 3:5-6NIV
Life is full of choices.
How you live your life, is your choice.
How you respond to trials, is your choice.
And what you do with His invitation to Come and Build upon His foundation, is your choice.
What will you choose?
“ The Spirit and the bride say, “Come!” And let the one who hears say, “Come!” Let the one who is thirsty come; and let the one who wishes take the free gift of the water of life.” Rev 22:17 NIV
Happy Thanksgiving.
May God bless you abundantly with the knowledge of how wide, long, high and deep His love is for you (Eph 3:17-19).

There's Still Hope- Building a Framework of Hope: Part 13

Three of the four people I mentioned in my previous post survived the Holocaust. The fourth died just days before liberation.
None of these people could control their environments. They were at the complete mercy of unmerciful people. 
And yet, they didn’t give up. 
They didn’t wallow in self-pity. 
While they didn’t like where they were or how they were treated, they didn’t let resentment fester until it killed any semblance of hope remaining inside.
When we reject the “bad” in life, we are not only rejecting God’s higher purpose for us, but we are also throwing away valuable lessons—lessons that can change our lives, mold our character, and give us a greater purpose for living than we ever dreamed possible. 
Trials can catapult us into a closer relationship with God, mature us so that we can be used in greater measure, and anchor down the beliefs we hold most dear.
Suffering great loss, such as those who experienced the Holocaust, challenges not only who we are, but what we believe to be true.
When all is taken from you…who are you?
When no one is there to comfort you…where will you turn?
When you can’t avoid the valley…how will you navigate through it?
When your world is pitch black…can you see the light? 
When evil is all around—when you are abused, neglected, or offended…how will you respond?
When trials threatened to defeat you…will you push forward?
While no one knows how they will respond to calamity, how we live our lives NOW is a good indicator of how we will traverse even bigger tragedies.
When we try to control every aspect of our lives we are not being dependent upon our Creator.
I’m guilty of being a “control freak”. I like to make plans and to have more than one “back up plan”. 
But God has shown me that this keeps me immature in my faith, impatient in how I handle setbacks, and full of turmoil. 
In essence I create additional chaos in my life because I am trusting in myself more than I am in Him.I think my plan is better than His and so I cling to an illusion that I have more control over my life and circumstances than I do.
I am rejecting His will for my life. 
“ give thanks in ALLcircumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus .” 1 Thess 5:18 NIV (emphasis mine)
We cannot always control our environments or the circumstances we find ourselves in. But we can trust that God is in control.
You didn’t suddenly slip out of His sight. 
He knows where you are and how you feel.
He knows the conditions you are living in.
He feels your pain.
He is not “toying” with you.
You are loved…even when nothing in this world feels very loving (John 3:16-17).
And for that, we can give thanks NO MATTER the circumstances. In ALL things we can have hope.Our God never fails (1 John 4:4, John 16:33) . 
When life gets tough, you don’t have to “get tougher”, simply trust in God (Deut 31:6).
Don’t let resentment, despair, doubts or fears steal your hope and joy (John 10:10).
HE is our hope and joy (Rom 15:13).
HE is the prize set before us (Heb 12:2).
This world, this trial you are currently in, is not all there is (Heb 13:14). 
There’s still hope.
Enjoy this song by Danny Gokey, “Hope in front of me”.

When Hard Times Come - Building a Framework of Hope: Part 12

Let’s continue learning from the past (reference the books listed in Part 10):
1.        You’d never believe how quickly you will exchange your morals for survival. That’s why it’s so important to Know WHO you are and WHAT you believe. If you compromise your beliefs and morals NOW, think of how much easier it will be to compromise when faced with severe circumstances. Lengyel’s book tells of women bartering their bodies (the last thing they have) for food or clothes.
2.       You don’t have to be overly “religious” in order to be a witness for God. The things you do, or don’t do, attest to WHO you belong to. Integrity shows brightest in the darkness. Not stealing in order to survive, telling the truth no matter the cost, not using vulture language, not curing those who persecute you, giving to others out the abundance of your poverty (trusting God to meet your needs), not resorting to violence and sex in order to survive are all ways people in those books showed the love of God in the worst environmental conditions imaginable.
Some went even farther by leading Bible Studies while in the concentration camps and/or praying for those around them. There are numerous ways we can let our lights shine, both in difficult times and not so difficult times. Regardless, it begins with having personal Character/integrity. Hard times challenge us, but they also build our character and give us opportunity to show the world the Character of God (love in action).
In Luke 6:27-30, JESUS instructs us to, “… Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. If someone slaps you on one cheek, turn to them the other also. If someone takes your coat, do not withhold your shirt from them. Give to everyone who asks you, and if anyone takes what belongs to you, do not demand it back.”
Romans 12:14 tells us to, “ Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse ”.
1 Peter 3:9  articulates this point further, “Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult. On the contrary, repay evil with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing. ”
Matt 5:16 says, “ In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven. ” 
You cannot always chose how you are treated, but you can chose how you will respond. The Bible is clear on how Christians are to behave—the character we are to display—even in the most trying of times. 
Reflection Questions:
1.        Do you have trouble trusting God in “good times”? If so, how do you think you will respond when life gets harder? 2.       We all are guilty of compromising at times. What are ways you can build your character NOW? (not taking an extra-long break at work even if everyone else does, clocking in/out on time, not taking post-it notes home from work, tithing, going to church even if you’re super tired/busy, getting up 10 mins early to read your Bible, making a prayer journal and actually using it, praying with kids before bed, etc)3.       Do you have a “bottom line”, you know, a standard of where you’d “never go” no matter what? Have you ever thought about the things you’d be willing to compromise in order to make ends meet or survive? 
It’s important to know who you are and what you stand for.

Lies we Believe - Building a Framework of Hope: Part 11

Last post I provided links to inspiring books about those who endured the Holocaust.
Today I want to share with you 3 of the lessons I learned:
1.        Belief that something bad “could never happen” to you is naïve. Bad things happen. People hurt others. Evil exists. FACT: A vast number of people who found themselves in concentration camps were not Jews. There were also political prisoners (those who spoke against Hitler or simply ticked him off), Gypsy’s, homosexuals, handicapped people, clergy, those who tried hiding Jewish friends, and some who had no idea why there were there (true story, some didn’t have a clue why they were imprisoned—maybe it was simply being at the wrong place at the wrong time…like at your window witnessing your neighbor being deported).
2.       Being silent is no guarantee that something horrible will NOT happen to you.  Actually, evil increases in the silence. Where there is a void (such as silence from the church) something will fill it (hint: look at America’s current moral decline). When God’s people remain absent, and impotent, to the evils in society, the wickedness will increase.
Bonhoeffer is attributed as saying: “ Silence in the face of evil is itself evil: God will not hold us guiltless. Not to speak is to speak. Not to act is to act .” 
Here’s what the Bible has to say about God’s people remaining silent in the face of evil: “ Therefore, to him who knows to do good and does not do it, to him it is sin. ” James 4:17 NKJV
This famous quote by Niemöllermakes it clear we must NOT be silent: 
“ First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Socialist. Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Trade Unionist. Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out—
Because I was not a Jew. Then they came for me—and there was no one left to speak for me.
3.     Tell the truth…no matter the risk or cost. The Bible instruct us to be honest (Lev 19:11) and trying to outsmart evil will not work. Evil changes the rules to meet its needs. Fear can cause us to want to lie, but we must TRUST God more than we fear evil. 
Examples:  
Prior to going to a concentration camp Corrie Ten Boom and her family hid Jews in their home. One day Nazi’s came and asked her sister if they were hiding Jews. Instead of lying, she told them they were hidden under the table. The Nazi’s thought she was crazy, they could see there was no one under the table. What they didn’t realize was that under the very floor the table rested on there were Jews hidden. God protected everyone involved. TRUTH PREVAILED. 
Wiesel made a rash decision due to fear. At one point he was in a camp hospital with an infection in his foot. The camp was being evacuated due to the Russian Army advancing and those too weak to walk to a new location were being left behind. Weiser was scared, so he lied and said he could walk. He should have stayed. Everyone who remained behind were freed. 
Lengyel liedabout her son’s age thinking it would protect him. It only sent him to the crematory sooner. 
Summary: 

Realize bad things happen to “good people”. No one is immune. You can’t lie your way out of hardships. Silence, and avoidance, only increase the likelihood of bad things happening either to you or others. Plus, being silent when you KNOW you should speak, is sin. 


Everyone dies at some point. Make your life, and your death, count. While you can’t trust man, you can TRUST GOD. 

Enjoy this music video by Switchfoot- Live it Well

How Others Built - Building a Framework of Hope: Part 10

I love History.
Therefore, in the next few posts we will explore how others endured great hardships in order to help us Build our own Framework of Hope so we too can come through the fire with something worth passing on to those who come behind us.
The things I’m going to share have come from the following books:
1.        Bonhoeffer: Pastor, Martyr, Prophet, Spy by Eric Metaxas2.       The Hiding Place by Corrie Ten Boom3.       Five Chimneys: A Woman survivor’s True Story of Auschwitz by Olga Lengyel4.       Night by Elie Wiesel
The people in these books did not one day decide they were going to be heroes—in fact, they didn’t even view themselves as heroes.
They didn’t go into the midst of Nazi Germany thinking they were going to change the world. And they didn’t sign up to be Role Models for countless individuals in the years following their bravery.
NO, they simply did what they had always done.
They lived a life of character DESPITE the circumstances they found themselves in.
You see, the decisions you make today, how you face trials now, and the things you build your life around, ALL play a factor in WHO you will become and HOW you will respond to catastrophes.
How you live your life RIGHT NOW helps determine if you will be able to “rise to the occasion” when, and if, your world collapses. 
At one point or another, all these people were faced the ultimate question (besides Salvation):
What’s my purpose in life?
Everything was taken from them.
They lost their jobs, homes, possessions…even their family. 
They had no status. No freedoms. Limited choices.
What motivated them to endure?
Why didn’t they give up, run away, or stick their heads in the sand? 
Some were driven by the need to survive for their loved ones—they maintained the hope that they would see them again. Or they felt compelled to resist the evil around them and wanted to tell the world the truth.
Others found their purpose in God—being an encouragement to others, shining His light, exemplifying His love. 
All felt the pressure to give up. 
None of them WANTED to go through the holocaust.
But they realized bemoaning the circumstances wouldn’t help. 
They had a choice.
And they chose to live above their situation.
They fixed their FOCUS on something greater than themselves, their possessions, and their environment. 
I look forward to sharing with you some of the things these brave individuals have taught me. I pray you will join me as we look back in time in order to build up our own HOPE that can endure anything.

Your Turn:

Do you have any heroes that inspire you?
Who's your role model and what has he/she taught you?  

Finding Joy in the Pain - Building a Frameword of Hope: Part 9

In Part 7, we explored HOW our response to tough times (and even our victories) illustrates our level of trust in God. 
Throughout Scripture, God tells us that trials are to our benefit…and yet so often we try to avoid them, or rush through them, with little thought of how they can benefit us.
 If in the midst of a trial our only questions are “why” or “how long will it last” we will miss the lessons.
Instead, we must train ourselves to find the value in the storm, the lessons to be learned. 
We should be asking, “ God, what do you want me to learn?”
If our focus in solely on the pain we are in, and how to get out of it, we will miss God. We will miss the JOY He brings and the HOPE we have been promised.
Have you ever the phrase, FOCUS DETERMINES REALITY?
If you are focused only on the circumstance, or the pain you are experiencing, your reality is limited to that. You will miss God. You will miss the blessings. You will miss the lesson.
If your focus is on YOU and YOUR abilities, you will miss God in action. 
Shifting our focus from self, and our circumstances, is not easy. 
But when our focus is on “SELF”, we are unable to see God. We are unable to TRUST God. And our HOPE is limited to what SELF can do. Instead of all that God can do.
When our focus is off God, we start to doubt Him.
Is God really good?
Does God really love me?
Is there a God? If so, why is He allowing this?
When my dad died I began to doubt God. Not because of his death, but because of the suffering he endured before dying. I began asking if God is truly loving. These doubts led to great anger with God. 
In the end, they also brought a closer relationship.
You see, God is big enough to handle our doubts, fears, anger and questions.
The KEY is to bring them TO God. 
God is a great teacher. 
Bring Him your questions.
Bring Him your doubts.
Bring Him your frustrations.
GO TOWARD GOD.
Don’t let trials drive a wedge in your relationship with Him.
You see, when I brought my concerns TO God, He changed my focus. 
I started out focused on me and my feelings. But in coming TO God with this, He changed my focus. 
That shift in focus, changed my entire perception of the trial.
Before I knew it, my doubts were gone.
My anger had melted. 
My relationship with Him was stronger…as was my faith.

I grew in that trial.You can grow too if you stop relying on self to get you through. If you stop focusing exclusively on the circumstances. If you turn TOWARD God.
A slight shift in focus can go a long way in helping you through the storm.
Suddenly enduring doesn’t seem so bad. Hope springs new. And peace that transcends understanding takes root.
I pray you’re starting to realize the challenges you face in life are not meant to defeat you, God allows them FOR your good (and so you can help others).
Refection Questions: 1.       In the middle of a trial, what are you focused on? Is that drawing you closer to God or pushing you farther from Him?2.       How can shifting your Focus change your Reality?3.       Next time you’re in a trial ask yourself: What does God have to say about this storm? What is He trying to teach me?

Do I Believe the Bible? - Building a Framework of Hope Part: 8

I was hit by a 2x4 the other day.
(not literally…but it still felt that way)
I was listening to a sermon by Francis Chan and I felt God ask me, “Do you believe my Word is true?”
My automatic reply was, “Of course!”
But I paused.
If I truly believed His Word is the final authority on EVERYTHING, why did I doubt Him?
What Chan said really drove this point home.
 Paraphrasing Chan, he said that if anything he believes doesn’t line up with the Bible, that he automatically assumes he is wrong—not the Bible. 
Ouch.
I’m guilty of looking for Scripture to align with what I already believe to be truth. And if I find something I don’t like, I sort of ignore it. (Did I just admit to ignoring parts of the Bible?) 
Yes, yes I did.
The Bible tells me to forgive 70x7. I want to hold onto my hurt and justify it by saying I’ve already forgiven that many times. I want to write that person off. I don’t want to be hurt again.
The Bible says to love our enemies. But what does that really mean? Can’t I avoid them? Maybe pray for them? Do I have to LOVE them (1 Cor 13 type love: patient, kind, long suffering, etc.)?
You see, if I truly believed God’s Word is truth—that His Word is Final—then my life style, thought patterns, and decisions would change.  As long as I view His Word as negotiable, I won’t grow in my walk. 
Yes, we will all mess up. That’s what 1 John 1:9 is all about, but overall I need to decide if I really believe the Bible to be absolute truth…even when I don’t understand some of the things it says… even when I don’t like some of the things it instructs me to do…even if it contradicts things I thought to be factual.
You’re turn:
Is the Bible True? 
If it is, how does this dictate your life?
We’ve been talking about Building a Framework of Hope: Are you building using God’s TRUE blueprint (BIBLE)…or your own version of religion?
Are you open to hearing God’s Word even if it’s something you don’t want to hear?