Deborah Gilboa's Blog, page 48
October 19, 2014
WGN TV, Chicago
On WGN-TV News, Dr. G will join Julie Unruh to talk about Ebola, Terrorism, Suffering: When the news makes you want to hold your kid tighter… should you? And how to teach kids to admire celebrities without worshiping them. Please tune in!
October 17, 2014
Foundation for Advancing Alcohol Responsiblity Twitter Party #JustDrive
It’s Teen Driver Safety Week! Celebrate by getting ideas to protect your teens and your whole family. Dr. G will join Mom it Forward’s GirlsNightOut Twitter Party this week as a panelist to talk about helping teens stay safe as drivers and as passengers. Support the great work of Responsibility.org and IKnowEverything: RSVP here - you could also win a $50 Visa gift card!
WPIX-11 Morning News, New York
Dr. G will join Sukanya Krishnan and Kori Chambers on New York’s WPIX-11 Morning News to discuss kids and germs. How can we teach our kids what they need to know to be safe and healthy, without creating germaphobes? Tune in and learn the 3 items to toss in your kid’s backpack (or pocket) before school on Monday!
Do You Want Teens Who Text and Drive? #JustDrive
It’s Teen Driver Safety Week.
Do you love a teen who is driving, or will be soon? I was asked by Responsibility.org to create this video about how we can help teens drive more safely. I’m thrilled at the opportunity because, more than illness, or drugs or any other poor decision kids can make (and DEFINITELY more than Ebola) – teens die in cars.
It’s time for teens to stop dying in cars.
Please get involved in the #JustDrive initiative and check out IKnowEverything with your teen. Parents and mentors make the biggest difference, and this is a life or death issue.
October 16, 2014
How Can a Dad Teach His Step-Daughter Respect?
I’m having a tough time accepting my step daughter. My wife and I will be married for a year this October. The transition to teaching manners and respect has been slightly dismal. We want to embed gratitude, understanding consequences and how to be an overall good person. What can I do to accept her and win her heart at times I do not want to be around her? She’s 9, and we met 4 years ago.
Anonymous, in LA
What powerful questions. You can accept her, and I have some specific ideas about how to help you do that. You can’t win her heart, that is up to her… but chances are good she really does want you to, and you can give yourself a fighting chance. Your third question – how can you teach her gratitude and respect – will be much easier to accomplish after you truly accept her.
All you need is love.
The Beatles made that sound simple, didn’t they? If only it were easy to find love in our hearts. It’s the answer, though. This girl needs to know that you love and accept her for who she is, not just who you are trying to form her to be. She can’t accept your instructions and criticisms if she doesn’t believe down deep that you will take her however she is, and that your efforts to guide her come from wanting her to succeed. So how can you really learn to love this imperfect – even difficult – child?
Find attributes you admire. What does her mother love about her? What is she passionate about, or good at or who does she make happy? Look for pieces of her that are great just the way they are (no matter how rarely you see them) and let her know. Don’t tell her “if only you were always like that” or “why can’t you be that way in this area over here.” Just give her praise, no strings attached.
Talk about your step-daughter in positive and uplifting ways, even when she isn’t there. How we speak about someone directly affects how we view them the next time we are together. So picture her in the room with you always, ready to hear and believe all of your positive emotions.
Love her for her mom’s sake. As you love your wife and accept her, accept this extension of her. Imagine the stress you will relieve, the honor you will bring to your wife by falling in love with her daughter. Whether or not you see your step-daughter as a reflection of your wife, it’s likely that they both see their relationship that way.
It seems that you have brought a new standard to her life. You are expecting respectful behavior, and changing the rules around her. These are good things that will serve your family well in the future, but you can see how she may resent your intrusion. Especially if her mom did not hold her to these standards before you introduced them.
If you can first love this girl, and help her believe it, you will be far more successful in guiding her behavior. She may be scared that you will leave her, or turn her mom against her, or leave her mom (and it will be all her fault) and so she can’t or won’t show respect. She may fear failing, or be angry at these new expectations.
Whatever her feelings, my only other suggestion is this: Ask her. In as nonjudgmental and non-threatening a way as possible, ask what bothers her about these rules, and listen to the answer. Don’t argue, don’t bargain, don’t plead or threaten, just listen. You may learn something helpful.
October 12, 2014
What to Tell Kids When Sports Heroes Fall
Watching sports can make for great family time and memories. Raising sports fans often leads to years of bonding and shared connections. So what do we do when a player the whole family admires gets called out for behaving badly?
Talk about it.
Our kids are ready to hear what we really think. I got a chance to talk to Parker Wallace on CBS’ Atlanta Plugged In about when and how we can discuss these conflicts with our children and teens.
What do you think?
October 6, 2014
WTOP 103.5FM, Washington, DC
Randi Martin of WTOP interviews Dr. G about Ray Rice, and how to help our kids when their heroes fall. What should we do when their idols display poor judgment, bad behavior or general jerkiness? Listen in!
Ebola & Kids
Ebola is scary.
I completely get that. The idea of “catching” something that can be fatal is one that sends most people down the rabbit hole, and the possibility of our kids catching something is terrifying.
Get the facts.
Find out how it’s spread, what you need to know, and what your kids need to know.
September 28, 2014
Violence or Bullying: How to Help Kids Feel Safe at School
“Education and fear do not belong in the same sentence.”
When experts are asked to appear on television to discuss the latest atrocity in a school, they often focus on the horror students, teachers and parents face. Understandably, the conversation usually centers on “how could this happen” or “what led to this event?” These discussions are valuable, but what parents and kids need to know in the immediate aftermath is…
What now?
I was honored to join Stefani Schaeffer to offer some answers to this question and:
When should parents talk to kids about these events?
How can we explain what we don’t even understand ourselves?
What skills do our kids need to go back to school with less fear?
How can this experience teach resilience and better prepare them for life?
What do you say to your kids when school is tough or even scary?
September 23, 2014
Spark and Hustle, Atlanta, GA
Dr. G is has been invited to join the stage with Tory Johnson, Coach Jenn Lee and other smart, savvy business people at the Spark and Hustle Fall Celebration! She will give her BEST tools for growing your business, as well as how parents can make a big impact on their kids in just a short time. Will you join in?
