HastyWords's Blog, page 47

SCARRED SMILES

Teeth

Nash

Grind

Chip

Fall away

Toothless

Grins

Painted

Strategically

Carefully

Painfully

On surfaces

Designed

Inked

Tattooed

Over

Emotionally

Scarred

And

Broken

Tissue

 

Tagged: Depression, emotions, Feelings, Pain, relationships, Sad, sadness, Scars, Worthless

DAYDREAM

The slight shade tickled my toes

As it danced around the sunlight

Whizzing dragon flies chased

Daffodils and sunflowers

That played tug of war with the breeze

Don’t they know? Don’t they care?

That their time is terribly short

The leaves will turn and briskly fall

The dragonflies will begin to freeze

And the flowers will drift off to sleep

Just as winter begins to creep

Don’t they know? Don’t they care?

That their time will  quickly end

Before they can simply ponder

Any of the why or why-nots

Oh to be the shade upon my toes

Or the playful dragons fluttering

Oh to be the carefree breeze

Teasing the flowers to sway

To live for the moment

Without a desire for purpose

To live in the world

And not have want or need

To live and just be content

Would be a beautiful gift

Tagged: Beauty, Daydream, Inspiration, Joy, life, Motivation, Musings, Nature, Poet, POETRY

BLACK AND BLUE

Tagged: Dark, Death, Depression, Desperation, Emotion, Feelings, life, Mental Health, Mental Illness, Poet, POETRY

MY DREAMCATCHER

Darkness sucks in a deep breath.

I can hear it gasping for air. My air.

As if it needs my life… to save it.

I can see it pacing on the walls,

Dripping from the ceiling above,

And swallowing the floor below

As the candle beside my bed dances.

I close my eyes to a different darkness

Filled with images I’ve collected.

Memories gathered to defend me.

Now that I lay me down to sleep

I pray for all the people that I keep.

I am thankful for all the love I’m given,

And that one love I never have to question.

Locked away inside the safest part of me

Far away from the monster of depression

Lurking and trying so very hard to seep

Into the fire that love created down deep.

And I suck in a deep breath…

Because I know your love

Specifically…

Is like a dreamcatcher protecting me

Tagged: Darkness, Depression, DREAMCATCHER, Friendship, Mental Health, Monsters, POEM, Poet, POETRY, relationships

VITRIOL TORNADOES

It was the turbulence

Paired with a high velocity

Waves of spinning motion

Spiraling in conjunction

With the flow of negativity

Abundantly loud and chaotic

Their emotions collided

Collecting speed

Grabbing debris

Folding violent hate

Into tornadoes of vitriol

Vorticity revolving

Around weapons

Made up of spittle

And condemnation

The eye of a hurricane

A vortex of judges

Swirling on high

Looking down waiting

To strike the match

That catches

The whole world

On fire

Tagged: Emotional, emotions, Fear, Hate, HURRICANE, POEM, Poet, POETRY, relationships, Tornado, Weather

NO TRESPASSING

Unsteady walls

False drawers

Cracked floors

Maintenance

Red light

Pay attention

I need…

It has to be here

Somewhere

Shuffled papers

Yellow highlights

Footnotes

Small print

Check the box

Yes or No

Check the box

Blank stare

Too many

Empty boxes

It has to be here

Somewhere

The answer

The truth

Hidden

Hiding

Fe Fi Fo Fum

I smell the blood

Of sacrifice

And heartache

Of Inner conflict

And self-defeat

Inside the victory

Of choice

Forced upon

Chipped away

My freedom

A slave to reality

A searching

For choice

Inside gravity

No trespassing

Constrained

A knotted rope

Unraveled

Revealing

The one choice left

My reaction

Tagged: Choice, freedom, Honesty, Lies, POEM, Poet, POETRY, right, Searching, Vote

IT’S COMPLICATED

 

I understand some people being so angry they are having a hard time wanting to move forward. I read a lot of fear and sadness and hateful posts and I get it. It’s emotional. We have a lot at stake. I don’t judge you for it and I’ll never say “just get over it” because I hate it when people say that shit to me.

I haven’t said who I voted for. Why? Because it is deeply personal and I analyze and agonize and really take my vote seriously. I don’t get the president I hope for more often than not. It doesn’t matter though. I voted and I took it seriously. It’s important to me to be invested in the place I work and play in.

When my husband said he wanted a divorce I really only had two options in my opinion. I could be angry at him considering all the time I had invested in the relationship. I could make it hard on him and try to sabotage his success for having so easily thrown our future dreams away. But why? To what end? Would being angry and fighting for him make my life better? Would that make him love me again and change his mind? Would it make it easy on my daughter?

So many things you have to ask yourself when deciding to fight or negotiate. I always chose both. I fight when I know it it will be beneficial for the majority. I fought for me and my daughter on the things that mattered but I did it without anger and I did it with grace.

I couldn’t change the outcome of divorce but I could change what happened after. He and I communicate, we negotiate, and dare I say we respect each other so much more now than we did.

I like THIS POST because it shows a sense of balance. The road ahead might be really rough but it isn’t the first rough road we have traveled together. And we are traveling it together whether we like it or not. We can travel it like prison inmates who hate each other or we can travel it like individuals who try hard to have each others back. To respect each other. To realize we aren’t always right. We can listen more and talk less. We can think about things before we speak. Something I’m trying to learn.

The truth is we should save the fight for the issues. This election was fought for already. It was fought by men and women who fought to have a voice generations ago. It doesn’t always work the way we want but it IS our system.

I’m not saying you don’t have a right to be angry. What I am saying is there are productive ways to be angry and there are destructive ways. You get to choose. You are free to choose. And THAT is a beautiful thing.

 
Tagged: Beauty, Choices, COMPLEX, Complicated, Decisions, freedom, life, love, NaBloPoMo

FIGHT FOR LOVE

Dear daughter:

You my love

Are a woman

And that means

You will be told things

Some will be true

And many more will not

The only thing

You must do

Is to find yourself

Who are you?

What you stand for?

And know you are strong

That you have options

And when you don’t

You get creative and

You fight

Fight for your voice

Fight for your rights

Fight for justice

Fight for peace

Fight for freedom

But above all

And especially

Use the fire inside

To fight for love

Tagged: #BeReal, Beauty, FEMALE, FEMINISM, FEMINIST, Kindness, love, MISOGYNY, POEM, POETRY, relationships

FUMIGATED

Some seriously talented guys wrote and performed this. It inspired me to write poetry. I hope you enjoy them both. And maybe share the video for me so they are inspired to create more fun stuff for us.  Let’s just take a break from the election stuff and laugh for a bit.

WHEN YOU ARE DEAD

When you are dead

You don’t care

That blemish

Just a blemish

Your weight

Just a number

The gossip

Just stories

The haters

Just puppets

When you are dead

The dreams

Are just movies

The hopes

Just a waste of time

The work

Just distraction

When you are dead

If you could wish

And you wouldn’t

But if you could

You would wish

That you had lived

Without all the worries

Responsible for killing you

Tagged: ANXIETY, Death, Family, life, NaBloPoMo, POEM, Poet, POETRY, relationships, worry