Lyli Dunbar's Blog, page 64

Lessons Learned in 3-D — Listen up

  Have you ever been in the room with someone, and a conversation is taking place — except you are not fully present?   Do you tend to “zone out” in conversations with family?  Is it hard for you to stay focused?  I must admit that this week this happened to me.   I had to ask my husband to repeat what He had said because I was distracted by my laptop.  I was not fully engaged. The ironic thing is that all week God has been talking to me about the importance of being a good listener.  (Obviously, I need to hear this more than once!).  I’ve learned a few things this week about “perking up” my ears, that I wanted to share.

Lessons Learned about Listening:

1.  A good friend pointed me to a helpful article by Anna Mannarino over for Relevant titled “How to Help Your Friend Fight Depression.”   Anna’s comments on “learning to listen”  grabbed my attention:

I need you to tell me true things, but first I need to know that I have been heard. I need grace when I say, “I’m the most miserable person alive!” Understand that right now, I probably do believe that.

Don’t immediately shoot me down with, “That’s not true!” Instead, let me know that you’ve heard me with something like, “Wow. You must feel pretty bad right now. You feel pretty alone, like no one else can really understand what you’re going through.”

2.  Then, I came across Cheryl’s post “Eleven Times to Be Quiet” at Homespun Devotions.  She challenged:  

But, though we enjoy speaking our minds, and in spite of all of our efforts to communicate, there are times when it is truly in our best interest and the best interest of others around us… to just be quiet. To settle down and let someone else speak. To manifest that meek, gentle, quiet spirit, “which is in the sight of God of great price.” To be the type of listener we want others to be.

3.  Next, I read another Relevant article by Michael Hidalgo titled “When Did Christians Get so Mean?”  Michael beautifully explains a key benefit of learning to listen:

If our deepest desire is to know the truth, then we will be open to listening—not just speaking—because there is a good chance someone else may share a thought, insight or wisdom we have yet to learn. And when our desire for the truth surpasses our desire to be right, then we will be open and always seek first to listen and learn.

4.  So, this lead me to do a little research on “The Art of Listening,” and I struck gold when I found this amazing post by Robin Dance over at The Art of Simple.  You need to just head on over there and read the whole piece, but here is the part that hit me the hardest:

Be sensitive to what’s being said.  Sometimes those you’re with don’t need you to say a word.  That’s when active listening makes a huge difference–you’ll know they need you to give them the time and space to spill their insides.  Your only response might be to shake your head in empathy, to hold their hand, to hug them tight.

5.  Finally, I am learning that listening is not only important in my relationships here on earth, but it is vital in my relationship with my God.  Angela Perritt reminded me in her book You are Loved, and in this VLOG in this blog post.  Here is a quote from the book that I underlined and have revisited several times this week:

There is something about being still, quieting our spirits, our minds, and our bodies that helps us focus on God.  I have heard it said that God is a gentleman.  He will not break down a door but rather will quietly knock at the door of your heart, waiting for you to let Him inside.  The problem is our lives are so busy and loud that many of us do not hear Him knocking.

Q4U:  Are you a good listener?  How do you develop good listening skills?

I am sharing “Listen Up” and joining like-minded sisters this weekend at Saturday Linky Love, Whatever is Lovely, Five on Friday, Friday Finds, and The Friday Five.  

The post Lessons Learned in 3-D — Listen up appeared first on 3-D Lessons for Life.

A Love Offering (Thought-Provoking Thursday)

Photo Credit: Nithya Ramanujam, via Free Images

A few weeks ago, I asked my online Bible study buddies to share how we could practically wash the feet of those in our circle of influence.  We’d just read that story in the Gospels, and I thought I’d get the typical Sunday School answers.  But one of the girls said something that caught me off guard.  She’s actually not very active on the page, so when I saw her name pop up in my Facebook notifications, I immediately clicked over to read her input.

Listening.

Her one word response jumped off the page and dropped into my heart.  I’d never thought of serving others by just listening.  The physical act of being present and attentive is a simple gift that honors others.  Why hadn’t I thought about that before?

Maybe it’s because sometimes I am uncomfortable with the silence.  I like to chat.  I have strong opinions.  I think I’ve never really learned to just love and listen and let my response turn to prayer, rather than a litany of words.

Over the last week, the Lord has brought the word “listen” to my attention again.

Listen to me, I hear Him saying to my spirit.  Sit in the quiet and just be still and silent.  Lay down your list and linger with Me.

I’ve never thought of listening as a way to serve my Savior, but maybe this love offering is what will please Him most.

I want you to show love,

    not offer sacrifices.

I want you to know me

    more than I want burnt offerings.

Hosea 6:6, MSG

Something to think about…

I am sharing “A Love Offering” and joining like-minded sisters at Three-Word Wednesday, The Weekend Brew, Spiritual Sundays, Recommendation Saturday, Faith-Filled Friday, Essential Fridays, A Group Look, and Thriving Thursday.

Looking for more thought-provoking posts? Check out the ones written by my blogging friends in today’s link up.

Have you written something thought-provoking, challenging, encouraging, or inspiring lately? Link it up here! For best results, write the title of your post in the name box.

As a courtesy, please link back to 3-D Lessons for Life in your post. Grab and share the Thought-Provoking Thursday button to spread the word. Use #ThoughtProvokingThursday to share your post and connect on Twitter.

Check back later to see what other GREAT posts have been linked up! Visit the post immediately before yours and leave an encouraging comment.

An InLinkz Link-up

The post A Love Offering (Thought-Provoking Thursday) appeared first on 3-D Lessons for Life.

Quiet

…He will quiet you with His love…
Zephaniah 3:17, ESV

I am sharing “Quiet” and joining like-minded sisters at Still Saturday and Give Me Grace.
Photo Credit: Hans Braxmeier, via Pixabay

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The Filling Station

Photo Credit:  PDP, via Pixabay

I never notice the fuel gauge.

Once a week, a little yellow light comes on my dashboard, and I am totally shocked and taken by surprise every time.  My supply is dwindling, and I pull up to the pump running on fumes.

My tank is empty.

Sadly, I often fail to re-fuel my spirit as well.   I am on the road of life pushing forward in spasmodic spurts when I should just pull over and fill ‘er up.

If I stop at God’s service station, I am fueled for the journey.   He checks under my hood and adds the very best oil to my engine and tops off my tank with His joy.

A cranky disposition is like the little light on my dashboard.   My soul is alerting me that it’s time to reconnect to the power source.

After a little pit stop, I’ll be zooming on down the road again singing a happy tune.

…the joy of the Lord is your strength

Q4U:  Does your tank run on empty?  How do you remember to re-fuel your faith?

 

I am sharing “The Filling Station” and joining like-minded sisters at (in)courage, Words of Life Wednesdays, Tell His Story, A Little R and R, Testimony Tuesday, Rich-Faith Rising, Sharing His Beauty, Playdates with God, and Unforced Rhythms.

The post The Filling Station appeared first on 3-D Lessons for Life.

A Strong Embrace

 

Photo Credit:  Curtis Copeland Photography

My husband is an awesome hugger.  Every day, when I get home from work, we share this ritual where we stand in the kitchen.  I am on one side by the sink, and he is leaning up against the island.  We look each other square in the eye, and then the Hug Fest begins.  I tell you, that is the best part of my day — it wipes away just about any stress I am bringing home from work.  A good hug is a healing balm.

The thing about a good hug is that you have to lean in and let go.  You know what I mean?  You have to be willing to rest within the circle of another’s total embrace.

This morning, I was driving to work under rainy skies, and God reminded me of a phrase I love in Spanish.   My Cubans often use it to sign off at the end of an e-mail or to say goodbye before the end of phone call.

Un abrazo fuerte. 

In English, this sweet phrase literally means “a strong embrace.”  It’s like a big hug from my husband.

I think the Lord was whispering “lean in” to my spirit.  He wanted to remind me that He is a hugger, too.   He holds me safely in His strong embrace.

I’m absolutely convinced that nothing—

nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic,

today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—

absolutely nothing can get between us and God’s love

because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us.

Romans 8:39, MSG

Something to think about…

I am sharing “A Strong Embrace” and joining like-minded sisters at Three-Word Wednesday, The Weekend Brew, Spiritual Sundays, Recommendation Saturday, Faith-Filled Friday, Essential Fridays, A Group Look, and Thriving Thursday.

Looking for more thought-provoking posts? Check out the ones written by my blogging friends in today’s link up.

Have you written something thought-provoking, challenging, encouraging, or inspiring lately? Link it up here! For best results, write the title of your post in the name box.

As a courtesy, please link back to 3-D Lessons for Life in your post. Grab and share the Thought-Provoking Thursday button to spread the word. Use #ThoughtProvokingThursday to share your post and connect on Twitter.

Check back later to see what other GREAT posts have been linked up! Visit the post immediately before yours and leave an encouraging comment.

An InLinkz Link-up

The post A Strong Embrace appeared first on 3-D Lessons for Life.

The Other Side

Photo Credit:  Walter Bracht, via Free Images

In September, we explored Alaska.  When we arrived at Whittier, we learned that in order to get to the capital city, we would need to go through a pretty long tunnel.  I immediately wondered if anyone on our tour was claustrophobic.  A dark enclosed space with no end in sight can be a bit frightening — unless you focus on getting to the other side and move past your fears.

I guess it’s really all about my attitude.  When I am at Disney World, I jump on to a moving cart and ride up and down and around through dark tunnels and over mountainous peaks.  I know that this will be a short journey, filled with fun surprises.  I never doubt that I will reach my destination.  I let go of my fears, and I find pleasure in the darkness and the winding turns.

I wish I could capture that same spirit on the ride of life.  If only I could remember that my destination is sure.  Although I may be in a deep, dark tunnel right now, my sweet reward is just ahead on the other side.

…See, I have set before you an open door,

and no one can shut it… 

Behold, I am coming quickly!

Hold fast what you have,

that no one may take your crown.

Revelation 3: 8 & 11, NKJV

Q4U:  Do you forget about the “other side” when you are holding fast in the darkness?  How do you set aside your fears and keep an eye on your sweet reward?

 

Let’s Hold Fast in 2014.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I am sharing “The Other Side” and joining like-minded sisters at Words of Life Wednesdays, Tell His Story, A Little R and R, Testimony Tuesday, Rich-Faith Rising, Sharing His Beauty, The Soli Deo Sisterhood, Playdates with God, and Unforced Rhythms.

The post The Other Side appeared first on 3-D Lessons for Life.

A Beautiful Difference

Some days, this world tells you that you are nothing.  A nobody.

Nothing will ever change — you will never achieve that dream and transform your life.

Some days, the voices of nothing want to erase your hopes and eradicate your dreams.

If you listen to those empty voices, you end up depressed, defeated, and desperate.

Some days, nothing is your story.

But if you listen quietly in the silence, you will hear the call of Love.

Love says you are a somebody.  Love speaks tenderly and says you are chosen, cherished, capable.

Everything is possible when you listen to the One who came down in Love.  He creates a beautiful difference that transforms your nothing into something significantly spectacular.

But you are the ones chosen by God,

chosen for the high calling of priestly work,

chosen to be a holy people,

God’s instruments to do His work and speak out for Him,

to tell others of the night-and-day difference He made for you—

from nothing to something,

from rejected to accepted.

I Peter 2:9-10, MSG

I am sharing “A Beautiful Difference”and joining like-minded sisters for Five-Minute Friday, Still Saturday, Give me Grace, and Three-Word Wednesday.

Photo Credit: PDM, via Pixabay

 

The post A Beautiful Difference appeared first on 3-D Lessons for Life.

Cleanup on Aisle 3 (Thought-Provoking Thursday)

Photo Credit: akaak19, via Free Images

Last night the power went out at 6 PM.   We live in Florida, and it felt close to 100 degrees in the house, so we immediately vacated the premises.  Our air conditioned vehicle transformed into a  safe haven on wheels.

We had time to kill — the automated voice on the line when I called the power company indicated that we might be in the dark for close to 4 hours.  With no destination in mind, we did what any hot-blooded American couple would do — we went shopping.  After I grabbed my cart in the Target parking lot, I aimlessly wandered up and down aisles just because I was hot and bothered.

I didn’t have a destination — I browsed through the books and CD’s, picked at the greeting cards, and rummaged through the framed art.  Nothing tickled my fancy.

At one point, a helpful employee noticed that I appeared lost and frustrated in the sock aisle, and she offered to walk me to the right section of the store to find the exact item I required.

“No, that’s ok,” I said.  “Just tell me where to go, and I will find it.”

Stubborn girl.  I wander around, tired and lost.  I fill up my cart with all sorts of junk on the journey.

I imagine that God is looking down at me — I’m making a mess of things by not listening, by not slowing down, by not following.

Clean up on aisle 3,  He says.  Time to step in and put things back in order.

I’m thankful that He doesn’t let me wander for long.

 This is what the Lord says:

“Stand at the crossroads and look;

    ask for the ancient paths,

ask where the good way is, and walk in it,

    and you will find rest for your souls.

    But you said, ‘We will not walk in it.’

Jeremiah 6:16, NIV

 

Something to think about…

I am sharing “Cleanup on Aisle 3″ and joining like-minded sisters at The Weekend Brew, Spiritual Sundays, Recommendation Saturday, Faith-Filled Friday, Essential Fridays, A Group Look, and Thriving Thursday.

 

Looking for more thought-provoking posts? Check out the ones written by my blogging friends in today’s link up.

Have you written something thought-provoking, challenging, encouraging, or inspiring lately? Link it up here! For best results, write the title of your post in the name box.

As a courtesy, please link back to 3-D Lessons for Life in your post. Grab and share the Thought-Provoking Thursday button to spread the word. Use #ThoughtProvokingThursday to share your post and connect on Twitter.

Check back later to see what other GREAT posts have been linked up! Visit the post immediately before yours and leave an encouraging comment.

An InLinkz Link-up

The post Cleanup on Aisle 3 (Thought-Provoking Thursday) appeared first on 3-D Lessons for Life.

Fragrant Offering

…walk in the way of love,

just as Christ loved us

and gave Himself up for us

as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

Ephesians 5:2

 

I am sharing “Fragrant Offering” and joining like-minded sisters at Still Saturday and Give Me Grace.
Photo Credit: Gaby Stein, via Pixabay

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A Piece of Cake

The daylight called me out of slumber.  I crawled out of bed, wiped the sleep off my eyes, and squinted at the alarm clock.

I was running late.   Again.

The urgency crawled up into my stomach and lurched me into motion.  I spent the morning spinning — rushing to work on the turnpike, typing frantically on my computer, working magic with minimal resources to resolve major problems.

By 10 AM, I was already exhausted.

Lord, I could use a vacation, I thought.     

Just then, a knock at the door interrupted my thoughts.  There in the doorway stood my angelic co-worker.  She fluttered with wings of encouragement over to my desk and placed a box between me and my demanding to-do list.

As I savored a spoonful of chocolate cheesecake, she offered me an adorable napkin that read

How did she know that “cake” was my love language?  Her sweet gesture helped lift my spirits.   I am so thankful for her thoughtfulness.

Do not neglect to do good

and to share what you have,

for such sacrifices are pleasing to God.

Hebrews 13:16, ESV

I am sharing “A Piece of Cake” and joining like-minded sisters at (in)courage, Words of Life Wednesdays, Tell His Story, A Little R and R, Testimony Tuesday, Rich-Faith Rising, Sharing His Beauty, Playdates with God, and Unforced Rhythms.

The post A Piece of Cake appeared first on 3-D Lessons for Life.