Heather Davis's Blog, page 44

I'm not a dancer

A few weeks back, Daughter 2 and I stopped in at the fountain drink mecca, otherwise known as QT. While we were there, a kindly, old gentleman stopped me and said, "Your daughter is a sweet little beauty." He, however, was pointing at a toddler who did not belong to me.

"That's not my child," I said, "But she is awfully precious," I added because what parent doesn't want to hear that her child is precious?

"Well," the gentleman continued, "I'll bet she got her beauty from you."

I chuckled becaus...

Conversation of The Week

Daughter 2: Momma, I think I want to find a job where I can dance.
Me: Really?
Daughter 2: Yeah. Not a forever job.
Me: What's a forever job?
Daughter 2: A job you have forever. I just want my dance job to be for a little bit. Like maybe when I'm in high school or college.
Me: What kind of dancing job will you get in high school or college?
Daughter 2: I don't know. Maybe a dancing job where the people just give me lots of money.
Note: She never said "pole" and I think with this child, I'm gonna hav...

She's gonna be alright

"Moooooommmmmaaa!"

It was a real, I'm-hurt-and-not-faking-it sob.  "I had a wreck!" Her bike helmet was slightly askew. Her arm was dripping blood, and she was limping. Together, we stood over the sink cleaning the blood away trying to get to the source of the gushing.  The Dad joined us with the hydrogen peroxide, and Daughter 1 eventually showed up with a hand towel and dozens of excuses as to why the bike wreck was not her fault.

We eventually (and collectively) got Daughter 2 clea...

Great Friends

The past few weeks have really shown me who my friends are. My friends have sent me emails, texts, messages. They've posted on my Facebook wall and tweeted and retweeted me and my tweets and offered their congratulations on my national TV appearance.

My good friends made videos for me national TV appearance. They entertained my kids. They offered rides to the airport and even offered to go to Hellmart for me. They offered quotes on my behalf and got their hair done by a real beautician an...

The Thong Story...

This was originally a part of the NWA - Listen To Your Mother Show. I relayed the story on National TV this week and many of you wanted to hear the full story. Here it is.  Enjoy & pass it on!

It was a typical Thursday morning:  Crazy, naturally, but not unusual.  Luckily, my daughters decided to take matters into their own hands.  They did their own hair and picked out their own clothes and lied about brushing their teeth without a moment's worth of grumbling.  My...

I bit the Big Apple

A nationally syndicated talk show contacted me about three weeks ago. They apparently had been following this blog and my Twitter and my Facebook. They liked what they read. They thought I was funny, and they wanted to feature me on their show about women who overshare their lives on the internet.  Weird, huh? Was I really an oversharer? I mean sure, I talk about bladder control and my cup size and my lack of razor-meeting-legs, but oversharing? OK. Fine. I see their point.

Within three d...

Conversation of the Week

In a minivan full of tween girls on a Friday night:

High-pitched squealing:  OMGOMGOMGOMG! TURN IT UP!
Me: {turns up the radio}
Menagerie of Tween Voices: Baby you light up my world like no body else...
One lone male voice: The way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed.But when you smile at the ground it ain't hard to tell.
Me: What the wha---???
The Dad: What?
Me: You're singing along to One Direction.
The Dad: I like this song.
Me:  {Extending my hand toward the driver's seat} Hand o...

Extreme Couponing

Daughter 2 really, really wanted to go with me to my coupon boot camp this weekend. The "camp" was only a ninety minutes long at our local library, but since the Money Saving Queen is major coupon royalty, I knew the place would be packed. I also knew that it might be the only hour and a half out of the day that I wouldn't be hearing Daughter 2 talking incessantly about whatever crossed her mind. If nothing else, Momma wanted a moment to just zone out.

As I got ready to leave, Daughter 2 broug...

Friday Film: Fantasy Football Bingo

Minivan Momma is NOT providing you with a pedicure. You will pay for your own pedicure. Or better yet - let your hubby, with all of his Fantasy Football earnings, pay for your pedicure.
Now, let's play!

Conversation of the week

I recently had the opportunity to have my hair and make up done by a show business stylist. She began my flatironing my stray flyaways:

Me: For the longest time, I didn't know how to flatiron my own hair. Stylist: Oh? Me: Yeah, I learned watching Jersey Shore. Stylist: Ok. Me: I didn't realize I could pull the flatiron down my hair. Stylist: It's really not hard.  It's one of the easiest things anyone can do. Me: Well, it's easy for you because you have two h...