Amber Belldene's Blog, page 7

Pantsing and Praying: My monkey-punk writing process.

This is the story of my by-the-seat-of-my-pants journey as a priest and a writer.  I’ve been meaning to write it for a while, but it took a fabulous post called Where I Write on Wonkomance and a lovely chat afterwards about not comparing ourselves to others on Twitter to finally urge me to do it.

When I graduated from seminary and went to work in my first parish, I was excited about wearing a clerical collar (which has ceased to hold appeal) and about a vision of myself I truly hoped would come to pass—the new, contemplative me who practiced centering prayer in silence in the side chapel every morning before work.

I tried, just like I have my entire adult life, to beat my monkey brain into quiet submission, or to pet it gently, promise God loves it, and then tell it to calm the fuck down in a hissing whisper.

In spiritual direction, I confessed my longing for silence and stillness.  My director nodded sagely and gave me good advice.  But slowly, over many months together we began to notice something about my spiritual life.  All my energy and my sense of intimacy with God came through talking with friends, studying and thinking, or writing sermons.

Years worth of self-flagellation (is that redundant?) began to heal.  I wasn’t called to be a contemplative.  I had an extraordinarily extroverted spirituality.  I did not have to learn to be quiet to be close to God; I only had to be myself.  I don’t think anyone had explicitly told me otherwise—it wasn’t an institutional expectation or a formative mentor that had told me to squeeze my square self into the round hole.  I think it came from a grass-is-greener type fantasy that being someone else would be easier.  And when I let go of it and began to work with the realities of my personality, I felt very free.

With a little hindsight, I can see I’ve lived this journey with my writing process too.

Around this time last year I was gearing up to write my third novel in a NaNoWriMo boot camp. I received the adamant advice that I must have an outline before the month began.  Newbie me didn’t rebel.  In my previous writing—academic, fiction of all lengths, and in my sermons–I often began with the bones of an outline, just a few plot points to help me anchor the forward movement of my story.

But the person facilitating the boot camp said a few plot points weren’t enough.  My outline needed to spell out goal, motivation, and conflict for every scene.  She wasn’t trying to hammer me into the wrong hole, but simply help me be prepared for the marathon of writing in a way that she herself found helpful.   And I trusted that this must be the right way to write.  So I agonized to draft the outline.  Two days into the frenzy of writing sprints that is NaNoWriMo, none of my vast and intricate document applied anymore.  My characters weren’t who I’d imagined them to be at all.

Twice more, I tried to outline a novel.  I read Debra Dixon’s book Goal, Motivation and Conflict and tried writing out a scene by scene synopsis.  Again, I found I had to throw it all out.  I don’t really know if all this trashed planning was wasted, but I now know it’s not necessary for me.

Over and over again, I’ve found I can’t plan out my fiction writing, or my characters. The only planning that works is to write backstory that won’t go into the actual novel.  I can only think about the story in terms of story—not lists or spreadsheets.  I think it’s the extroverted part of me—I really need to encounter a fully fleshed out character before I can figure out what he or she will do with the shitty situation and the perfectly imperfect mate I’ve designed.

Here is my process as I have finally accepted it. I offer it because I so needed to hear from other writers how their processes worked and didn’t, defied common wisdom, and caused them the same kind of agonies and ecstasies mine causes me.  I also hope others will share the stages of their writing process.

Wildest Dreams: It usually happens in the middle of church, or in the shower, that I come up with a premise that excites me.   Afterwards, I try to explain and get puzzled looks.
Distracted Driving: I think about it this new idea at all the wrong times and in all the wrong places.  I almost drive into parked cars.
Sadistic stylings: I imagine some characters with extremely dark pasts and weird hang-ups.  Ideally these will clash in some delightful way and I cackle aloud in line at the grocery store.
Character Cocktail Party: I MUST write in each of their points of view to get to know them.  (Only once I know their voice can I understand their goals, motivations, and conflicts.)  I come to love them as one does a quirky, flawed old friend.
Butt on couch, words on page: After I write approximately two chapters in each character’s voice, I know in my gut how the whole romantic story arc will unfold, but even then, I cannot write an actual outline or really even explain it to a writing buddy.  At this point, if I sketch a few plot points, they might hold.  But I don’t even need to.  The words will flow as long as I can find time to write.  *Knocks on wood*
I type “The End” and I DO NOT WAIT: I know everyone says you should sit on a draft for a week and come back with fresh eyes.  Alone, my eyes will never be fresh.  I need people with whom to talk it through.  So after a very quick revision for internal consistency (like when I change a character’s name half-way through), I send it off for developmental betas.
I ask for help: I used to feel really ashamed by how much help I needed from my beta readers because I couldn’t spot the problems myself.  Just like I thought I should be able to tame my monkey brain.  But the truth is I am an extrovert and my hyper little monkey is the source of great ideas and the energy to write, a lot, while I am also a mom of toddler twins and a full-time priest.  It’s like I have a monkey-driven engine in my brain, and all that vine swinging generates power that I can convert into words on the page. (BTW: I promise I will never actually write a monkey-punk story)
I trust myself: This when I get loads of contradictory advice back, because I let people read something rough, and they don’t quite know what’s wrong.  I don’t take their advice, but I use it as a diagnostic tool.  Criticism removes the scales from my eyes and I do the hard work of revising again.  I often do another round of betas before submitting.

When I finally accepted that I am at heart a pantser who writes character driven stories from the gut, I began to trust my process so much more.  There are moments, like today, when I have all the notes back from the first round of betas, and I’m daunted to begin the surgery that has to happen now.  But I know I will, once I post this.

But first…

I would really love to hear about other people’s writing process.  And also if it has changed over time.  Please share!

Okay, now…*Presses Publish*

Tweet

Exciting News: I’m coming over to the light side!

This is just a quick post to announce I’ve signed a contract with Entangled Publishing for my contemporary novella One Sinful Night in Sao Paulo.  It will be part of Entangled’s new Flaunt imprint, and I’m thrilled they’ve given this fun little story a home.

I started out writing dark paranormal romance because I love it, and because it’s a way to explore the deep mysteries of life that fascinate me as a writer and a priest.  But I just couldn’t resist writing something sexy and fun about the world I occupy in my day job as an Episcopal Priest.

Here’s a taste of the blurb:

CASSIE WILSON has traveled to São Paulo for her brother’s wedding; yet she’s the one with cold feet. She’s all set to begin seminary, but she’s sick and tired of being treated like a good girl, especially by the best man. What she really needs is one sexy night with him to ease her jitters and give her a taste of normal life. But if she gets what she needs, what will come next?

I promise to never stop writing dark paranormals, but you can expect some more light, sexy contemporaries full of the foibles, aches, and ecstasies of work and life as a priest.

A dear friend of mine lives in São Paulo, and I fell in love with the place when we visited him years ago.  You’ll get a great feel for that unexpectedly beautiful city in this novella.

Curious to read more about churchy heroes and heroines? There are a lot of other great books out there!

The mystery novels of Julia Spencer Flemming are becoming favorites of mine.
A fabulous memoir co-written by my friend Laurie Brock called Where God Hides Holiness.
And I really enjoyed Julie Anne Long’s historical A Notorious Countess Confesses.

Tweet

Team Maras enters the Men of Omnific Smackdown

So I’ve been woefully absent from my blog for a while.  I’ve just passed the anniversary of two years back at work since my kids were born, and my day job is especially fun right now, which also means it’s demanding lots of creative energy!  Fiction-wise, I haven’t let up on the words per day, but the blog has had to give a little, or a lot

Still, I love blogging and it’s good to be back. I’ve got a whole list of things I want to tell you about, and I just finished a story I’d been planning to write for ages, so I intend to be around more often.

This week, the big news is that team Maras is facing off in the Men of Omnific Smackdown.  Andre, Kos, and Bel are pitted against the other heroes in books published by Omnific, within their respective categories!  If you haven’t met them yet, come by and get acquainted.  And of course, we would all appreciate your votes!

If you already know my guys, then you can imagine just how demeaning they find the following advertisement:

In the “Alpha and Protective” category:  Meet Andre Maras from Blood Vine!

My name is Andre Maras, and though I was born a few years before Jesus Christ in the city of Rome, I consider Croatia my home.  It is there I was made a vampire, and where I became a vintner, and raised my family.  Croatia remains in my blood in ways I wish it were not, though I now dwell in California, on my estate in wine country.

You can find out all about me at Shayna’s Spicy Reads–she coaxed the answers to some rather personal questions out of me.

 

In the “Swoony and Sensitive” Category: Meet Kos Maras from Blood Entangled! 

My name is Kosjenic Maras, Kos for short.  I’m one hundred and seventy four.  I was raised in Croatia, on the beautiful island of Šolta, but I’ve lived in California with my adopted father since the days of the Gold Rush.  We came with rootstock from our vineyards on Solta, and we’ve been making wine here in Sonoma County ever since. I’m the logistics man at my father’s winery–the Kaštel Estate– which means I make sure my father has everything he needs for growing grapes, harvesting, crushing, bottling and distributing his wine.

If you want to know how I seduce a woman, drop by Victoria’s Gossip Blog to find out.

And in the “Brooding and Broken” category: Meet Bel Maras from the upcoming Blood Reunited (releasing in January)

My name is Lobel Maras, but everyone calls me Bel.  I was born in Croatia in the 1840s, though now I live in London, where my band of vampire mercenaries is based.  Most days I commute to Oxford, where I have a laboratory.  But ever since my pain in the ass father landed himself in trouble with Hunters, I’ve been crashing at his place in California.  And I have to admit, wine country has way better weather than London.

If you want to know the most interesting place I’ve ever made love, drop by Mary Elizabeth’s Crazy Book Obsession.

Tweet

About vamps, Episcopal priestdom, and how they mix

I’ve been head down, fingers on the keys trying to wrap up my summer writing project.  The words are flying, the blog is neglected  There are only so many hours in the day, right?

But I have BIG NEWS!

I had the huge honor to be interviewed on the USA Today HEA Blog this week and they sent me really great questions if you want to take a peek.  This is their tag: “About vamps, Episcopal priestdom, and how they mix.”

Also, I won the first round of Scorching Reviews’ Sex Scene Championship, and I will be competing against the formidable Lucy Felthouse on August 20th.  Mark your calendars! (I could use your votes!).

BLOG TOUR:

This is also probably a good time to point you to some of my the posts about Blood Entangled that have been flying around on the Internet:

Here is an interview with Para Your Normal–they asked great questions and I loved the “tweetables” they pulled out!

Here is one about bad guys where I confess that “Some of my best friends are sadists.”

And here is one about writing from lots of points of view (with a tip for readers and a giveaway!)

 

Tweet

Blood Entangled release week review round-up

One of the most nerve-wracking things about release week is waiting for those first reviews, but I’ve been delighted by the responses Blood Entangled has received in these last few days. Here are the highlights:

Blood Entangled is a delightful book. It has edge, sex, and the perfect amount of class. The action just spills onto the pages drawing you in like the vampire to the vein. –4.5 Stars from the Scandalous Book Blog

Amber rocked the vampire world once again with this story!…It was SO great to get back into the Kastel Estate Winery and see where things are headed! Predictable is NOT a word I would use to describe this book, that’s for sure.  I wasn’t sure how I would like Lena when I started this book, but by the end of the first chapter I loved her. I will be looking forward to more and more from Andre, Zoey, Kos, Lena, Bel and the whole awesome cast of characters! – 4.5 Stars from the Read-Love-Blog

This book is about Kos and Lena’s story which I enjoyed so much. They were sweet and cute together, their was just something different about their connection. -A Trail of Books Left Behind

Once again, I liked not just the great cast of characters, but the gripping plot that completely held my attention. I think my jaw even dropped a few times with a “Did that just happen?” going through my mind…I‘m very excited for the next book! - 5 Stars  From Book Sojourner

I haven’t read many vampire paranormal romances lately but this one is definitely one of my new favorites. The writing was fabulous and I am hoping that Amber is planning to continue this series. Lots of surprises in both books. If you enjoy paranormal romance this will be up your alley. They are easy to read, fun plots that are quite heated. — 4 Stars from My Seryniti

It would seem that, no matter how I identify sexually – queer, bisexual, straight (um, well, the latter’s not actually possible) – sexual tension, and its resolution, steam me up. So, I admit it. I am a voyeur into the budding romances of Lena and Kos, AND of Pedro and Lucas. And, you’re asking me to choose?! Nah. I like it all. —  5 Stars Amazon Reviewer “Massimo Bill“

Okay, full disclosure–that last one is my best friend and invaluable Pedro/Lucas consultant.  He gave me the confidence to bring those characters to life, and it makes me smile that he has developed a little affection for romance novels thanks to me

Lastly, I want to acknowledge book bloggers–they are some of my favorite people!  Thanks for taking the time to read and get the word out about all books.  I know you all love to read, but to write reviews is a very special labor of care and love, as you are discussing something near and dear to the author’s heart!    I honestly do appreciate all reviews, positive or not.


Thanks also to Literati Author Services for organizing this wonderful review tour!




Tweet

Blood Entangled release day! Get Blood Vine Free

Hooray! It’s finally here!

Blood Entangled is live!

I’m totally in love with this review from Jillian over at the Read-Love blog:

“Amber rocked the vampire world once again with this story!…It was SO great to get back into the Kastel Estate Winery and see where things are headed! Predictable is NOT a word I would use to describe this book, that’s for sure.  I wasn’t sure how I would like Lena when I started this book, but by the end of the first chapter I loved her.  She is a passionate gal with a wit about her that was unexpected and totally enjoyable…” (more)

Purchase Links: Amazon | Barnes & Noble 

Read my super fun release day post from the Kastel Estate on Parajunkee’s view!  

And remember, if you buy a copy of Blood Entangled today, you can get a free copy of Blood Vine for Kindle.  Already read it?  Share your free copy with someone who might like it!  Here are the details!

There’s also a giveaway on Literati Book Lovers today!

And here is the August tour schedule from Parajunkee Blog Tours:

8/01 Contagious Reads http://contagiousreads.com

8/02 What the Cat Read http://whatthecatread.wordpress.com

8/05 ParaYourNormal https://parayournormal.wordpress.com

8/06 Leena.Me http://www.leeanna.me

8/07 The Avid Reader http://the-avidreader.blogspot.com

8/08 Fae Books http://www.FaeBooks.co.uk

8/09 Readers Confession http://readersconfession.com

8/12 Book Cracker Caronline http://www.Bookcrackercaroline.blogspot.com

8/13 SMIBookClub http://www.SMIBookClub.com

8/14 Books Make Me Happy http://BooksMakeMeHappyReviews.com

8/15 Fiktshun After Dark http://fiktshun.com/afterdark/

8/16 Crossroads Reviews http://www.crossroadreviews.com/

8/20 Penny For Them… http://pennyforthem1.blogspot.co.uk/search/label/Tour

8/21 Reader Girls http://www.readergirlsblog.com

8/22 Parajunkee’s View http://parajunkee.com

8/23 Book Suburbia http://www.booksuburbia.com

8/27 Fall Into Books http://falln2books.blogspot.com

8/28 A Life Bound by Books http://alifeboundbybooks.blogspot.com

Tweet

Blood Entangled Release News and 2 Vampires 4 the Price of 1

Blood Entangled releases TOMORROW and I am absolutely thrilled by the comments I’ve been getting from my early street team readers on Team Kastel, and from a few reviewers I’ve chatted with.

 Yesterday I did my first official reading and signing at Joanie’s Gourmet Market near Tallahassee.  Imagine my *squee* outside a restaurant when my aunt showed me I made the paper!  I was epically excited, even though I simultaneously realized I sat in chewing gum on the airplane from the Romance Writers of America Conference.  (Who puts chewing gum on an airplane chair? That has to be terrible karma!)

We had a great turn-out, and Joanie introduced me as “very naughty,” which I loved! I was delighted to hear from fans.  We had some great discussions about how romance gets us through hard times, why that Happily Ever After matters, and the healthful benefits of reading sexy books. Here it looks like I just ran my big mouth all the time, but I promise I actually listened too

As I said, Blood Entangled releases tomorrow and I am so excited about the promotion we are doing for the first two days the book is out!  A free Kindle copy of Blood Vine with purchase of Blood Entangled!  Here are the details:

Tweet

That one person. That village. A report from #RWA13

Samantha and I wearing mustaches at an RWA party hosted by Smart Bitches, Trashy Books.

I’m posting a little road report from my first Romance Writers of America National Conference.  I’m having a great time, and I’ve gotten to meet my friend Samantha face to face for the first time, after a long and rewarding online friendship.

Meeting Samantha, who is an invaluable critique partner to me, got me thinking about the friends I’ve collected since I began writing, and the old friendships that have deepened.  I really love Samantha’s writing, and her limitless ideas.  She is my fixer (like Kos is Andre’s). I usually give Samantha my manuscripts when I am almost done because she is such a sensitive and careful reader—she catches all my loopholes and character glitches.

Samantha is just one of the people I have come to rely on as a writer.  I have the person I trust to read all my raw copy when I just need an initial reaction.  I have the person I call when I need professional, writer-ly advice. I have the person I call in my insecure moments when I get stuck in a project or awed by another writer’s talent, I have the person I send pictures of my boobs tattoo to so she can tell me priests shouldn’t posts pictures of their boobs on the Internet.  ”Why the picture?” you ask.  Well, there’s a perfectly good reason: My tattoo will be one of many author tats featured on the A Little Bit of R & R  book blog tomorrow.

I’m learning that, like raising a child, writing a book (or raising a writer) takes a village.  Sometimes I freak out about how much help I need.  Even though my priest-self knows asking for help and being part of a community are healthy virtues, the insecure writer in me fears that if I need help, it’s a sign I’m not skillful enough.

Being here at RWA, which is a huge conference full of smart and supportive people, is a great antidote to that self-sufficiency myth.  Every workshop I attend and conversation I am having here reminds me I am not supposed to be able to do this alone.  I am looking forward to joining other writers’ villages this week, and inviting more into mine—because as writers and as human beings, we are stronger when we support each other.

Tweet

Betas Never Claim to be the Next Big Thing: Blood Entangled Countdown

Hello, Amber’s readers, Kos Maras here.  That’s me in the picture, although I usually do wear my shirt buttoned and my tie tied.  Amber deleted all those shots from the camera.

I’m hijacking this blog for the next few weeks to get ready for the release of Blood Entangled, the second book in the Blood Vine series, which is sort of about me, but really it’s about the lovely Lena Isaakson, my lovable fool of a father and my whole ridiculous family.  Oh yes, and the bad guys called Hunters.

Amber and I have argued about this at length, but I proudly claim my status as a beta in the Maras household.  As eldest son, I’m my father’s right hand man, the fixer, and the one that calls him on his bull…oney. (Let me confess the company of Lena will inspire any male, human or vampire, to clean up his language!)

Amber’s friend Celia Breslin invited her to do this Next Big Thing blog hop.  Celia’s debut book Haven just released, and it’s about a very trendy nightclub down in San Francisco.  I’ve never been, but I hear from my brother Pedro it’s “hella hot,” an expression I had the misfortune to learn from him.

1. Amber’s Next Big Thing is the release of Blood Entangled on July 23rd. 

Amber intrudes with shameless self-promotion to say you can enter to win a copy or add it to your to-be-read shelf on Goodreads.

2: Amber tells me that the idea of the book came from Blood Vine. As she was writing my father’s story, she couldn’t help but notice my inconvenient infatuation with Lena.  And of course the Pedro and Lucas saga continues (I’m not being snide, they call it that themselves.)  Also, Amber is tapping me on the shoulder, telling me to add this:

At first the sexual bliss of vampire bites seemed mostly benign to me, but as I became more immersed in the world of vampires, I discovered the dark and disturbing way that bliss could be abused.

And like every voyeuristic author she had to stick her nose right into that sordid story.

3: The genre of Blood Entangled is Vampire Paranormal Romance.  But lest you think it’s for young adults, let me tell you Pedro and Lucas must have shot some amateur videos to provide Amber with details.  To be honest, I’m not sure how she found out my personal business. Amber…?  Hey, where did she go?  Krist, she’s sneaky!  Hhmm. Onto the next question.  Let’s see…

4: Which actors would you choose to play your characters in a movie rendition?

Well, that’s absurd. I can’t cast myself in a movie.  Or Lena, or Andre. However, I will say that Lucas bears a striking resemblance to a clean-shaven, yellow-eyed Timothy Olyphant, the fellow who plays Raylan Givens on Justified.  I don’t watch much television; I prefer to read.  But that series is an adaptation from one of my favorite writers, Elmore Leonard, so I could not resist it.

5: What is the one-sentence synopsis of your book? Oh, and look, Amber has come back just in time to provide me with this:

When Kos rejects Lena, will the dark seduction of a rakish new vampire finally bring her the pleasure she desires or deliver her into the hands of Hunters who want to destroy everything the Maras family has worked for?  

Krist, that makes me sound like an asshole. But I suppose it’s about right.

Well, without further ado and in the order of the alphabet, here are some of Amber’s fellow writers who are blogging about their Next Big Things:

Fellow Omnific author and all-around lovely: Justine Dell

Look: a man who writes awesome romance! Ed Hoornaert

Sweetie, Omnific author and paranormalist: Patricia Leever

Southern belle and sexy fantasy writer: Paula Millhouse

Ass-kicking angel-assassinista: Tricia Skinner

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tweet

Research, Imagination, and Pinterest (with Blood Vine boards!)

Will I get booed off the internet if I confess I am not a big fan of man candy? By that I mean the beefcake pictures a lot of my friends and the folks I follow share on Facebook and Twitter. I’m not complaining. Share away!

It’s just that when I look at a picture of a beautiful man, it doesn’t do much for me compared to reading the story of fascinating man. When it’s an actor whose work I know, and I associate him with a role, I love to see the pictures. (Hello Alexander Skarsgard!)

Maybe that’s why I’ve always been a reader–stories move me more than images. I like paintings, but I’d rather have a book. There is something so thrilling about having the power as the reader to concoct the images in our head! And while I love nice visual descriptions and take pains to write them, I’m not the most visual of readers. I don’t picture the whole scene, or even a character’s whole face, as much as I cling to the memorable details.

I do search out images when I’m writing, both online and in books. Images help inspire me, stimulate my imagination, and draw out a richer vocabulary. Months ago I started using Pinterest for my research, but I kept my boards private. I didn’t want to give too much away. Now I’ve made two of those boards public so readers might get a sense of the Blood Vine world. I hope you enjoy seeing inside!

What about you? Are you a visual reader or not? Do you like man candy pictures?

Do you use Pinterest? What for?

Tweet