Gary Goldstein's Blog - Posts Tagged "role-model"

We are now two weeks into 2014, and it is a good time to gauge where you are, as far as new year’s resolutions are concerned.

Millions of people vow to start each year by working out, eating healthy, quitting smoking, etc., but the majority give up on those commitments.

Why is this so?

Well, I am certainly no expert, but can only speak for myself.

First of all, I don’t even make any new year’s resolutions, because, quite frankly, I live the way I want to all throughout the year, and, therefore, don’t need to start doing anything from scratch from day one.

That is not to say that I have my “house in order” completely, but do by best to live the right way on a daily basis.

Perhaps it is because I spent nearly six years behind bars from 1998 to 2004, and do not want to chance returning to the negative lifestyle that I was involved in for so long back then, and now always maintain my focus on my top priorities in life.

Exercising, healthy eating, waking up with a smile on my face, and being grateful for where I am now in my life, are just a few of the constants that continue to keep me grounded and content these days.

Writing this blog, maintaining my sobriety, and delivering motivational & inspirational speeches to help others in their recovery, or anyone not living up to their full potential, are things I began doing once I came home from prison, and have truly become almost as important to me as breathing, since they are my personal ingredients for a happy, productive life.

Now, back to you, my readers.

For those of you who have made new year’s resolutions, and are now having a tough time keeping them, here’s some advice from me.

You might want to start off slow, rather than bite off more than you could chew.

For exercise, try walking a block every day for a week, and then each time after that, increase your distance by small increments until you arrive at a satisfying mark. If you feel that your stamina has built up to a good level, then by all means begin jogging.

As far as eating healthy, start your day off with a nutritious breakfast that will keep you full and energized until lunchtime.

Consuming a lunch that is high in protein will insure that you won’t get hungry and have to grab that unhealthy candy bar at around 2:00 in the afternoon.

For dinner, have a sensible meal that will carry you over to breakfast the following morning, including vegetables and a piece of fruit as a snack.

I find that drinking water all throughout the day not only keeps me away from binging on chocolate and chips, but also does wonders for the skin.

If you are a smoker – and I hope you are not – then quitting this nasty habit could very well be the toughest task of your entire life.

However, like anything and everything else, you have the power and the choice to accomplish this!

You weren’t born to lag behind anyone else in the world.

You are a winner and role model to others.

So, start to shine like the star you are!

My name is Gary Goldstein, author of "Jew in Jail," as well as blogger, and motivational & inspirational speaker.

More importantly, however, is the fact that I am an addict in long-term recovery, approaching six years and four months clean.

It took a lot of pain and suffering - both that I experienced myself and caused others - to finally get me to change my ways.

But once I finally decided to seek recovery from alcohol, drugs and gambling on October 31, 2007, my life has continued to get immeasurably better.

I know I have a disease, and that there is no cure, so I must remain vigilant every single day of my life and make sure to never get overconfident or complacent, because that is an easy way to relapse.

I am also extremely aware that this disease doesn't discriminate, and whether you are a college graduate, like I am, or a homeless person sleeping in the subway, addiction will destroy your life the same way regardless.

So, how does one rationalize it when a person who seemingly has it all - most recently, actor Philip Seymour Hoffman - succumbs to this disease by way of an overdose?

Well, I am certainly not a doctor, but just a guy from Brooklyn, New York, who has seen a lot in his 52 plus years on this planet, and, for me, at least, it all comes down to self-esteem and self-confidence.

Even though I was an A student, who went on to earn a college degree in journalism and then worked for many prestigious companies in the media industry, it wasn't until 1998 - the year I got arrested for robbery, due to my past addictions to alcohol, drugs and gambling, and was ultimately sentenced to seven years in prison - that I finally decided to spend time being introspective and come to terms with why I was drinking, using drugs and gambling.

I simply wasn't happy who I was, or, as many people call it, "comfortable in my own skin."

Knowing I wasn't going anywhere until 2004 at the earliest, barring a successful criminal appeal, (which was not meant to be, and I served just under six years), I decided to put my thoughts down on paper, and wrote Jew in Jail.

http://www.jewinjail.com/

The therapeutic value was something I had no idea would end up being so priceless to this day, as it was the impetus for all of the good things that have happened since my release from prison.

I am now the president of the alumni committee at the Coney Island Hospital Chemical Dependency Program, and am also on several committees with the New York State Office Of Alcoholism And Substance Abuse Services.

I have returned to Rikers Island to speak to the detainees there and help spread the message of recovery, and since I didn't have a number on my shirt this time around, I was treated much better by the staff!

By being connected to OASAS, doors have opened, including getting invited to travel the country to attend National Recovery Day, as well as speaking to prisoners at other correctional facilities too.

http://youtu.be/dE4DFCbXRF4

The bottom line, in my recovery and from what I have learned by speaking and attending Alcoholics Anonymous, Narcotics Anonymous and Gamblers Anonymous meetings, is that the only way to remain clean is by sharing the message of recovery and hope with others.

Keeping things bottled up inside for so long, thinking that my problems were unique to me, was a huge mistake.

I have so much gratitude for where I am in my life now, and owe it all to not only the great people I have met along the way, but to my own determination and desire to finally change and stop beating myself up about my past.

As for addicts like Philip Seymour Hoffman, Cory Monteith, Whitney Houston, and all of the others who have perished too soon, it just goes to show that being a wealthy celebrity is no guarantee for happiness.

We are all humans, with feelings, emotions, desires and needs.

Being labeled a recovering addict doesn't bother me one bit.

Life is way too short to care what others think of me.

If you are a recovering addict, I hope you realize the great decision you made to seek treatment.

If you are still "out there" dealing with the insanity that comes with using, please consider going to a meeting or, at the very least, picking up a phone to call someone and ask for help.

You are worth it, and a role model waiting to blossom.

Now that the warmer weather has finally arrived and we all survived such a harsh winter, the tendency is for us as human beings to think we need to hurry up and cram good times into as many days as possible, before the temperatures dip back down again.

I, for one, love the summer, but forever need to remember that it was always my favorite time of the year to drink and do drugs.

There is just something about being able to leave my house and walk outside without a shirt on and just wear shorts to go to the beach, play ball, or simply hang out with friends.

I felt liberated – after a long winter – to be able to enjoy myself knowing that the days were longer and I could lay in the sun to get a tan.

However, my addiction would always turn what I thought was going to be fun into something worse.

Fights, arrests, gambling problems, and other negative consequences were the result of thinking I “deserved” to have fun during these warm months of the year without any regard of the outcome.

Nowadays, fun takes on a whole new meaning, since I am clean nearly six and a half years.

Responsibility, dependability, reliability, and trustworthiness are just some of the positive characteristics that I take pride in, and combined with my desire to help other recovering addicts, or anyone not living up to their full potential, is what motivates me each and every single day, rain or shine!

I don’t begrudge anyone who drinks socially, and just hope it doesn’t interfere with their normal, everyday life.

Nor do I have a problem with any person who works hard for a living, pays his or her taxes, and is a positive role model in the community.

In a perfect world, men and women who are successful would have sense enough to help those who are less fortunate than they are.

For when they do, we all feel better about ourselves!

Enjoy this great weather everyone, and if you ever feel the need to talk about something that is on your mind, know that I am just a click away!