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"Shattered Lives" Chapter 14: The Wizard's Legacy book 1

Chapter 14Revealed TruthsTheron stood upon the northern tower and wind blew across his face. It whipped his hair and he drew his cloak closer to himself. Mist still laced the morning, and the cool white haze blanketed the horizon. The distant murmur of the city drifted up to their ears between dog barks and horse brays. A number of servants stood around Theron as they waited for Olivia. They talked in low voices as Elshender and his two knights stood close at hand.Among them stood two beasts of might and beauty: griffins. Their heads were that of an eagle, framed with cat-like, pointed ears, and great wings were tucked close to their sides. Their front legs were birds’ feet, dark talons curled and scraping along the stone roof, and the hind legs were those of a lion. The torsos and tails were also of a lion, though their tails were tipped in feathers. The beasts stood alert, the wind wafting their feathers with each gust, and their heads moved in a jumpy, bird-like fashion as they whispered between each other. Two servants stood on either side of the griffins, and fastened saddles between their wings.Theron looked out across the land toward Wraith’s Hollow far beyond his seeing capabilities. The dark tree line sent his mind back to the day they were attacked. How did he stray so far from her side? If only he could go back and protect her from whatever evil had befallen her. He closed his eyes and sighed heavily, as he did before battle to calm his nerves. He looked up into the sky and saw pasty clouds drift past on a sea of blue. A hawk soared among them. He thought of The Wizard and wondered if he would help them. Let me find the truth today, he thought. Let this be my Olivia! “You all right?” Elshender asked as he nudged his arm. Theron nodded. He looked to the large warrior and the knights beside him. Their weapons, one a sword and the other with a mace, were well hidden behind thick robes. Elshender studied his friend, and saw his rigid steps as he paced and his eyes leaping from one thing to another. He clapped Theron on the back, and nodded encouragingly.Theron glanced away and cleared his throat, trying to quiet his beating heart.“Ah! There is my darling, scrumptious love!”Theron turned and saw Olivia walking toward him, Cedany, Krea, and Sobriina close behind. The she-elf glanced at Prince Theron and looked away before anyone noticed. She turned her purple eyes out across the land, gaze falling on an owl that flew toward the castle in wide arcs. Her shoulders bunched and her eyes darted away.“Smile,” Elshender mumbled to Theron.The prince grinned as he wondered if this Olivia was in fact not a someone, but a something. He walked toward her, his arms outstretched. “My dear.”Olivia, her lips pulled taut in a wide smile, took hold of his cloak and yanked him close. Theron bit back a grimace as her lips pressed over his. His hair stood on end, and he resisted the urge to pull her back.Olivia released him and smiled again, though her brown eyes did not look at him. “What is your delightful surprise?” she whispered. She curled a strand of his hair through her soft fingers.“Um . . . well—” He cleared his throat and eased his hair from her hand. “You said you wanted to learn how to ride. Ride a griffin, and now . . . you can.” He motioned to the beasts behind him. “They are prepared and waiting.”Olivia’s eyes flickered to the griffins and her smile melted. “Poisoned air—”Theron gave her a sideways glance, the curse quite unladylike.“Um . . . how sweet, but . . .” Olivia laid a hand on her brow. “I’m not feeling very well, as of late.” She looked at him, her brow creased. “I don’t rightly think it would be wise to take part in this thrilling and dangerous sport in the state that I’m in.”Theron raised his chin, dread’s cold touch freezing his blood. “You seemed fine to me during breakfast.”“Oh, it has suddenly come over me. You must understand, beloved.” Olivia grinned and stepped closer, her lips puckered.Theron drew back and forced her to stand at arm’s length.“Darling?” Olivia stared at him, alarmed. “Whatever’s wrong with you?”Theron looked into her eyes and swallowed hard. “Remember when we first met?” he whispered.“Oh yes,” she said with a sigh. “How could I forget?”“It was so beautiful.” Theron willed himself to smile. “At Crown Haven’s gates, the sky bright and blue, with everyone around to welcome me. And then I kissed your hand. When we first met.”“Of course,” Olivia said. Theron’s heart leapt into his throat. “I remember it well; it was not very long ago. What a delightful day! Well, once I overcame my foolish nervousness.” She smiled bashfully.Theron gazed down at her, unable to move. His heart struck against him as though it tried to escape. “That’s where we first met?” His voice cracked and he swallowed hard. “Right?”“Yes, my lord,” Olivia said, her head tilted to one side. “Why are you mentioning our first meeting?”The prince swallowed hard. Goosebumps rose along his arms. He closed his eyes and gathered his nerves. This woman could still be Olivia. She may still be here somewhere. He took a swift, controlled breath. “I . . . I’m concerned for you.”Olivia’s brow furrowed as she studied his face. “Oh, this is just a sudden yet passing chill I feel. I am going to be fine.”“Are you?” Theron’s gaze sharpened. “You’re acting . . . different.”Olivia blinked and turned away. “Whatever do you mean, my lord?”Theron stared down at her as a thin string of hope gripped his heart. He turned her toward him and cupped her face in his hands, looking her in the eyes. “Olivia.” She stared up at him, wide-eyed. “Olivia, I love you.” His heart pleaded for her to come back.Olivia laid a hand over his and smiled. “Oh, my lord . . .” She sighed and wrapped her arms around him. “I will always return your love, tenfold.” Theron embraced her and felt her heartbeat against his chest. He closed his eyes and laid a hand between her shoulders. He questioned his doubts as he felt her beside him. A fool! That’s what I am. A fool for questioning her! This is Olivia, my bride and—            Theron’s eyes flew open. His hand, on the back of her neck, stiffened as he felt her smooth skin and . . .His heart skipped a beat. His fingertips brushed small, taut strings crisscrossed down her spine, like the cinching ties of a dress. Olivia swiftly inhaled and drew back with a sudden jerk. She touched the back of her neck and placed her veil over the stitch work. She smiled weakly, but looked away. “A horseback riding accident, my lord,” she whispered. “It embarrassed me, thus I long to conceal it. Also why I don’t want to ride such frightful beasts as griffins.” Theron rigidly stared with bulging eyes and mouth half open, realization draining him of color. After a silence, which was far too quiet, Theron shut his mouth as his eyes narrowed to darkened slits. He looked to her nose, at the corners of her mouth, and her ears. He noticed that, beside her left ear, stitches were crossed along its high corner.Olivia tensely stared at Theron. She glanced at the griffins, the servants, and the men-at-arms. She eyed their weapons and looked away. “What are your thoughts, my lord? Share. If we are to be one—”“I told Olivia to call me Theron.” He looked her in the eyes. Brown eyes, they were brown. He lifted his chin, clearly remembering Olivia’s vivid emerald eyes! “Theron. Not my lord.”Olivia stared up at him, then giggled. “What are you talking about, my love? Why say I told Olivia? I am Olivia!”A muscle in Theron’s jaw twitched, vehement loathing emanating from his gaze. Olivia’s smile disappeared. Sobriina glanced between the two, her mouth half open.Theron reached forward and grabbed Olivia’s face with one hand. She screamed as his fingers dug into her eye. He pulled and skin tore free. A shriek fled Olivia’s lips, shrill and wild-like. She fell back, her hands pressed over her face and collapsed to her knees, wailing. Krea rushed to her lady’s side, screaming, as Cedany followed. Sobriina did not move as she watched, her hands held behind her.Theron, his eyes cold and muscles tense, looked down at his hand. A misshaped shred of ivory skin flapped in the breeze. It had two holes in it, one for an eye and one for a nostril. Theron looked back at Olivia and listened to her whimpering howls.“Flesh Thief . . .” he whispered darkly. His chest heaved as color rushed into his face. “Flesh Thief!” He raised the skin in his hand so all could see.The servants yelled and flinched back. The men-at-arms drew their weapons without another thought. Krea stared at the strip of flesh, her cries suddenly caught in her throat. Sobriina covered her mouth and stared at the woman on the ground.Olivia shuddered and looked to Theron with her good eye. “W—what?”Krea backed away and seized Cedany. She would not let go.A tear fell from Olivia’s eye. “Why speak such horrid things—”“Take it off,” Theron seethed.“My lord—”“Take it off, by the Silver Eye!” His face trembled and his eyes burned. He drew his sword and held it in a firm grasp.Olivia gulped and sobbed, looking to anyone for help. No one moved. Olivia turned back to Theron with trembling gasps. He stood over her unmoved, eyes cold and murderously dark as he adjusted his hold on the sword.Olivia sighed and her eyes lost their horror. She glanced away and shrugged with a sniff. “Shame,” she muttered as she stood. She faced Theron and his heart missed a beat. Half her face was Olivia, but the other half was a mess of shredded skin. No blood dripped from her, but a darker shade of skin peeked through the gore. She grinned and her eyes narrowed. “Took you rightly long enough to figure it out!” She smirked.The Flesh Thief took a fistful of her blonde hair and pulled. Her face stretched until it tore in two. It fell away and hung limply down her back, the golden locks dragging upon the ground.Krea screamed and one of the servants fainted. Theron flinched and stared, forgetting to breathe as he stared at who lay underneath the disguise of flesh.Nan’s grin broadened as their eyes locked. “You know, boy?” She scratched her forearm. “Yous be a good kisser.” Her nails dug into her arm until the overlaying skin began to tear. Krea turned away with a guttural cough, bile rising from her stomach. Nan laughed and ripped the skin from her arms. It fell to the ground in dead heaps. “Oh, and I’m a Wilder! Shade Kin, if you must know. Just like everyone thought. Surprise! Ha! Ha!”Renewed hatred washed over Theron like a boiling wave. He had slain Wilders before, one more would make little difference. “Where is Olivia?”“You’re not the best kisser, I say,” Nan continued. “A Charnelic would better the best, or even a werewolf! If there’s enough meat in his belly, that is. But you’ll do.”Theron stepped forward, his breath coming in rapid bursts. “Where is she? Is that her skin?” His voice cracked despite himself.Nan absentmindedly glanced at her hand and picked the skin still attached to her fingers. She flicked it to the ground in little flakes, humming.Theron’s eyes darkened. “What have you done with her!”Nan shook her head and sighed. “This was the bestest thieving.” She grinned. “Even better than when I were in that wolf’s hide and went to that village. Learned throats rip out nicely with a good set of fangs in.”“I will not ask you again!” Theron yelled.A chuckle lifted from the Wilder’s throat and rattled its way to her lips. “You’re cursed, king of dung!” she sang high and loud.Theron blinked.Nan looked at him. “Cursed. From them stones Unki the Firm sits on—”“Is she still alive—”“Cursed! By the ground! The sun! The moon! The holy stones!”“What have you done to her!”Nan’s eyes narrowed and a smile rounded her lips. She pointed a finger at the prince, half covered with the tattered, stolen skin. “May your eyes be gray. May them be dark like a Wraith, for a Wraith you’ll become!”Theron straightened his back as his grip of his sword tightened.“Be always bad! Always cursed! And may all your lovelies be ripped from your heart!” The Flesh Thief’s smile grew. “I, Fyss, Flesh Thief of Unki’s Fist, curse you in and out!”Theron lifted his chin, yet his blood chilled. He could not breathe.“Nan,” Krea gasped, a puddle of vomit strewn beside her. “What, what happened to you? Why are you so . . . This is not like you! Did Lord Demus curse you too?”Fyss gave the pale girl a cold look and shook her head. “Nothing’s changed in me. The disguise is gone, off at last! I ain’t that mother-like lady, Nan. I don’t care about you! I be Fyss! I’ve attacked a village because they sold my daughter! My little Nadira, little shadow princess . . . I’m a killer, a true Shade Kin! I be a Wilder! Hail Unki the Firm! May he stick your jaw!”The Flesh Thief grinned as Krea flinched away, coughing again. She shook her head and glanced back at Theron, her head tilted to one side as the dead scalp and long hair shifted in the wind. The shredded skin’s face stared blankly at those around it, hollow and unblinking. “Foolish man—”“Answer me!” He hissed. “Where is Olivia?”Fyss lifted her chin. “Where you left her.” She absentmindedly motioned to the horizon, to the far off black line of Wraith’s Hollow. Theron’s stomach flopped on itself.Cedany gasped suddenly, her face white. “Valsara,” she breathed. “You killed Valsara. That’s her skin. You killed and skinned Olivia’s double. That’s why we couldn’t find her. Oh, Wizard save us!”“But why go after her, huh?” Fyss asked. She shrugged and crossed her arms over her chest. “She’ll be used by that man who’s got her. He’s a smart one, he is. Will come up with new things to do with her pretty little self.” Theron’s skin crawled as his hand tightened on his sword. “Once she’s spent, he’ll get rid of her. She’s probably half eaten by wolves by now—”“By the One in Red, I will saw you in two if I must!”The Flesh Thief stared at Theron, stunned. She threw her head back and laughed long and hard. “You? You, saw me in two! Like a log for the fire?” She chuckled and shook her head. “Not your day to kill, oh cursed prince. Not yours!”Theron stepped forward, his sword lowered to the level of her heart. “You will tell me—”“He sees all!” Fyss cried. “Knows all! Knows you see my face! Knows I’m done here! That Spellbinder! That horrid, wonderful, beautiful—”The Wilder cried suddenly and fell to her knees. She gasped and collapsed to the ground. With a shake of her head, she chuckled. “See? I speak and his powerful hand strikes.”Theron stared at the Flesh Thief, his eyes wide and brimmed in darkness. “No. . . . Wait!” He dropped his sword and raced to her side. “Speak! Before it’s too—”“Fool!” the Flesh Thief choked. “Was too late the day—” Her back arched as pain riddled her face. She groaned and blood seeped from her nose. “—the day . . . Olivia was taken from you . . .”Theron’s heart beat wildly as he watched the life being pulled from Fyss’s eyes. He seized her shoulders and jerked her this way and that. “Talk! Where is Olivia!”The woman grinned, her eyes narrow and filled with amusement. The next moment, a gray emptiness dulled them, and her body fell limp in his arms. Theron blinked as he stared down at her, heart racing with dread.“No, no, no, no . . .” he moaned. He shook her shoulders. “Come on. Come on! Talk!”No one moved as they watched their prince’s frantic efforts. He did not care; all he knew was Olivia was gone. Dead in all likelihood! Killed, left in some shadow or behind a rock, her clothes torn by hungry hands. He swallowed hard, but the lump would not leave his throat.A hand lay on his shoulder. “My lord?” Sobriina whispered. He did not respond as he stayed focused on the dead woman. “Theron?”“Get away!” he hissed.She withdrew her hand, but did not move from his side. “She is dead.” Theron closed his eyes, his jaw clenching. “No further insight can be drawn from her.”He stared down at the Wilder and realized her blood stained his clothes and pieces of stolen skin had flaked onto him. He looked into her rolled-back eyes, hoping life could still be found in them. He glanced away and stood with shaken hands. Still, no one moved as they stared at their prince. The breeze whipped between the gathering and chilled them all.“Get rid of it,” Theron ordered Elshender before turning and thundering away. He rushed downstairs, his steps strong and loud as he stomped down the hallway. His thoughts twisted and collided until they were a tangled mess. His eyes darted to everything that moved, and his fists were clenched. A servant almost collided with him as he rushed around a corner. She threw herself against the wall to avoid his piercing gaze.Theron had told himself there was no such thing as Spellbinders, no such person as Lord Demus. But now there was? And he, the future king, had left her. Left his betrothed, his Olivia, to be used. To be killed! What kind of king was that? Who leaves their woman defenseless in the horrors of Wraith’s Hollow! Not a king worthy of Tulaun. Not worthy of any land.Theron burst into his chamber, the servants inside jumping as the door banged against the wall. “Everyone out.” They stared at him in stunned silence, staring at his bloodstained tunic and clumps of flaky skin. Theron met their gaze and his stare darkened. “Out!”They dropped everything and hurried out the door.He paced the room and his heart pounded in his throat. He wiped his mouth again and again, remembering the fervent kisses he had given a Wilder. A fool, that’s what he was! He clenched his eyes shut and gritted his teeth.How long had Olivia been gone? What if she was taken before they were even in Wraith’s Hollow? Crown Haven could have been the last time he had seen her. Or worse! What if he never met her at all? Lady Olivia could be a mere name from a sick-minded fiend! A fake! Could she be nothing but a well-disguised sham? Theron shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair. It can’t be! He loved Olivia! She loved him! She could not have always been that Wilder! But if she was . . .Olivia’s smile, her laugh, her lips, her words, her life . . . all a lie? She betrayed him. She was a lie from the start—Theron shook his head. He groaned and took hold of the bedpost. The Flesh Thief’s blood made his fingers sticky against the wooden frame. He felt the hard wooden engravings against his fingertips; it was something solid, something real.Olivia didn’t betray me, Theron told himself. She is real. The Wilder is to blame! He took in a deep breath and forced himself to think rationally. As he rigidly stood, like a warrior on the verge of war, his heart bowed under the weight of pain. The glassy surface held together with all its might, but it could not withstand the burden. A crack lined its side and shards fell and stabbed him. Theron flinched, but did not hear the fracture of his heart.He turned toward the window, looking in the direction of Wraith’s Hollow. He knew she was still in the demented woods, still alive. He could save her. Yes! He could bring her home! Marry her! There was hope! And he would rid the world of this so-called Lord Demus. The Spellbinder was a fool to have taken his bride!Theron lifted his chin and straightened his back. His eyes narrowed as he stared toward the horizon. He could almost feel his sword in hand, and the required force to lodge it through Demus’ stomach. A shadow darkened his brow. Yes, he would go back to find Olivia and bring her safely home. He only prayed she had the strength to survive long enough for him to find her.



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 “We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.”
~ 2 Corinthians 4:7Our hearts are fragile.
Fragile like glass.
Hearts of glass.

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"Shattered Lives" Chapter 13: The Wizard's Legacy book 1

Chapter 13Whispered PlansOlivia was acting odd. It was the little things that were different—nothing important, however . . .            During the following morning, the castle’s royalty slowly awoke, whereas the servants, guards, stewards, and Seers had been up before the sun. Theron sat at the dining table and listened to the buzz of activity around him. It was the first day in a long while he did not have to wear his sword, but he strapped it on anyway. Without it, he felt naked and ill prepared. His food lay untouched as he watched Olivia drinking from a horned cup. His mind spun with unsettling thoughts.A half-eaten piece of venison lay on her plate, for she had said mere bread and milk in the morning would never fill her. Her hair was up in braids and wound in a blue veil. He wondered why she kept putting it up even though he had told her, on the balcony in Crown Haven, that he enjoyed it down. Customs, he reasoned; she had to follow them. But, he remembered that she enjoyed her hair down as well.            “Are you all right, beloved prince?” Theron turned and found Sobriina’s purple gaze studying him. He nodded and turned away, wondering if he was the only one who noticed the new quirks of his bride. It was as though she had forgotten herself and was somebody new. It was strange, so very strange.            Why had she changed? Did the attack in the forest make her . . . He had no word for it as he glanced at his dear lady. Perhaps she was troubled by the blood and death she saw. She had never seen it before; she would not know how to take in such an experience. He must help her somehow. How could he distract her from the memories of Wraith’s Hollow? The death of Nan. He sat for a long moment as he watched her. She was so beautiful. An idea lit his eyes and a smile spread across his lips. Elshender noticed his sudden change in mood from across the table, but said nothing. “Olivia,” Theron whispered and grabbed her hand. “I want to do something special for you.” She flinched at his touch, then smiled and took his hand. “Oh, a surprise?” She clapped her hands giddily.            Theron’s jaw tightened. Her mouth curved up in a grin, but her brown eyes were anything but smiling. He cleared his throat and glanced away. “Yes, that’s what it is . . . a surprise. An hour after your meal, meet me on the northern tower and go to its flat roof. I’ll be waiting.”            “I’ll be there,” she whispered, her scarlet lips pursed. Theron forced himself to keep his smile and stood. He turned to leave, but stopped. His eyes narrowed. He looked back to Olivia and stared at her, his head cocked at an angle. She laughed with Countess Primis about something and took a huge bite of meat. He stepped forward, his eyes locked on hers.Olivia looked up at him and her smile wavered. “My lord?”Theron said nothing as he peered into her eyes. Brown. They were brown.“My lord?” she repeated. Olivia looked to the others at the table and giggled. “Has my beauty enchanted you, rendering you speechless, my prince?” Countess Primis and a few of the other women laughed.            “Your eyes . . .” Theron pointed. “They’re brown.”            Olivia nodded. “Indeed, as they have always been.”Theron blinked and shook his head. “No. They were—”“Were what?” Olivia lifted her chin. “A different color? And how, my lord, could that be?”Theron, his mouth open, shook his head.Olivia smiled and glanced back at her food. “I will meet you on the rooftop in an hour or so, my lord.” She blew him a kiss.Theron stared at her. “Why’re you calling me my lord?” he whispered.“What?”“Nothing.” Theron bowed and walked out of the room. Once outside, he stopped and ran his fingers through his sandy blond hair. Two guards stood at the doorway behind him and a few servants passed in silence, but all kept their eyes downcast and left the prince to himself. He shook his head and looked up to the high-arched ceiling. With each heartbeat against his chest, he felt the glass organ would leap out of his throat. He swallowed hard.            “My lord?” a voice whispered from behind. He turned and Sobriina stepped through the door and walked to the prince’s side. “My lord, her eyes are discolored, are they not?” Theron shrugged and glanced at the floor. He shook his head again and breathed out heavily. Sobriina studied her friend.He saw her brows knit together. “What is it?” he whispered. A servant walked by, his eyes downward, but Theron knew he still heard them. The she-elf waited until he was gone.            “Please tell me,” she said, her voice hushed, “that I am not the only one troubled by Olivia’s new ways.”The prince blinked in surprise and smirked. “I thought I was the only one.” Sobriina shook her head and glanced at the dining hall door.“Come with me,” he whispered. Theron grabbed her arm and led her down a hallway. They walked through a large room into a small chamber.Weapons lined the walls, and a rug of wolf’s fur carpeted the stone floor. A bowl filled with oil sat in the midst of a wooden table; a flame danced above its oiled container. No one was in the room, save the two friends. Theron shut the door behind them and the fire’s orange glow lit their faces. “Tell me what you’ve noticed,” he said, facing her.Sobriina warily stepped further from the door, her eyes shadowed with concern. “My accusations may be flawed, my prince,” the Lunaris whispered. “But . . . I dare say Lady Olivia has changed.”            He nodded his head. “I’m grateful you see it too.”            “Indeed.” Sobriina wrung her hands. “The Lady Olivia I know is not like the lady we just sat with. Small things. Simple things, that is all I have noticed, yet they stand out and look me straight in the face!” The she-elf shook her head; she looked pale. “Olivia is not like this, this woman. Not so sharply changing in her temper, such as how she snapped at you when you mentioned her brown eyes! Also, the Olivia I love did not always embrace you at every possible occasion. She was very reserved about her feelings toward you.”Theron glanced away; he did not want that aspect of Olivia’s new character to change.            “Her vocabulary is different,” Sobriina continued, “and not like her. And how she acted when Nan was horribly slain! She barely spoke of the woman who was like a mother to her. Not even a tear stained her dress! No, she is acting as if she is not disturbed for the fallen creature!”            “I agree.” Theron nodded. “I would think Nan’s death would put her in a mournful state.”“My lord, I fear for Olivia!” Sobriina cried suddenly as she took hold of his arm. “I do not know what has become of her, or if a spell has taken hold of her, or . . . or—Ah! I don’t know!”A muscle in his jaw tightened.“We’ve gotta figure this thing out,” said a new voice.Sobriina and Theron whirled around and saw Elshender standing in the doorway. They hadn’t even heard him enter. The warrior looked at Theron, his jaw clenched and shoulders back. “I’ve got a few ideas.”Sobriina opened her mouth to object, but Theron nodded before she could speak. She shut her mouth and frowned.Elshender closed the door and they sat at the table. He glanced at Sobriina; his eyes ran her up and down with a scowl. He turned to Theron and stuck a thick thumb in Sobriina’s direction. “You’re asking this woman for advice?” She glared at him testily.Theron looked his friend in the eyes. “She’s not a woman. She’s a she-elf. There’s a difference and I value her words. Respect her.” Elshender looked down and shifted his weight. He grumbled something under his breath, but fell otherwise silent.Sobriina eyed Elshender and lifted her chin. A small grin pulled at her lips and she turned to Theron. “May we speak frankly in this counsel?”The prince nodded.Feet thudded past the closed door, and everyone stiffened. They listened until the footsteps carried on, and their shoulders relaxed. No one spoke for several moments until Sobriina motioned to Elshender.He gave her a firm look, but glanced away before Theron noticed. “There’s lots of things that could be the answer,” Elshender said. “For one, maybe she is just being more . . . queenly like. Coming to Henricien could’ve reminded her she’s to be queen. She might be afraid, and not know how to cope with her new identity or something. I don’t know, women act strange for no reason sometimes.”“Yes, but that does not explain her callous response to Nan’s death,” Theron said. “I know Olivia. She should be heartbroken.”“Beyond even that, I trust.” Sobriina nodded.“Nan could’ve been a mere slave,” Elshender suggested. “That’s what she was anyways. Or even she could have stopped Olivia from being her real self. Now that the slave’s dead, Olivia’s being herself.”Theron’s eyes narrowed. “You know that is not true.”Elshender looked at his friend and saw his stiffened shoulders and balled fists. The soldier sat back in his chair and held up his hands. “To be honest,” Elshender said, “I was not with the lady that much. I don’t know her as you two do. But, really, none of us has known her for long.”Theron glanced away from Elshender before he said something rash; he knew Olivia, and he loved her.Elshender eyed his prince for a moment. “What? You don’t like this new side of her?”“This is not her!” Theron’s eyes locked with Elshender’s once more. “This is . . . is trickery! It is a cruel game of sorts.” He shook his head. “It’s not her . . .”“She completely loved Nan,” Sobriina said as she shook her head. “Without a doubt.”Elshender looked away from Theron, and the prince uncurled his fist. “Or . . .” Elshender’s eyes narrowed. “She was raised in a really peaceful place, right? No fighting. No death. Not like anything in Wraith’s Hollow. That was new for her. The attack could have, you know . . . shaken her up too much.”            “Yes,” Theron muttered, “I’ve considered that.”            “No, I mean . . . She was shaken up a lot. Might have done something to . . .” Elshender motioned to his head. “You know . . . There might be several reasons for her new strangeness; this could be one.” He snapped his mouth shut at Theron’s cold stare.            “But it isn’t,” Theron whispered.“You don’t know that.”“She’s not crazy!”“She’s a woman. They’re crazy to begin with. Don’t rule stuff out so quickly.”Theron gritted his teeth, but looked away. His heart pounded; Elshender’s words were too disturbing. He looked straight before him and breathed out a slow, loud sigh. “What else? Yes, your suggestions are worth hearing, but what else?”            Elshender and Sobriina glanced at one another, but neither responded. Elshender cleared his throat and scratched his nose. Sobriina stared at nothing in particular with narrowed, thoughtful eyes. “What about a spell?”Elshender glanced at her.Theron’s brows drew low; he did not want to consider it. “Do you really think it’s possible?”            Sobriina nodded. “A spell could have been set on her shoulders.”Theron sat back in his chair and crossed his arms over his chest. This was absurd! Wizard forbid such an awful thing!Elshender shook his head. “Just stories—”“Consider it.” Sobriina leaned forward, her eyes intent on Theron. “Lord Demus’s blood is laced with power from Wraiths themselves! Perhaps this is why her eye color changed! Demus’s eyes changed to gray when touched by dark magic; maybe our lady’s eyes did as well.”            “Sure, if he was real,” Elshender muttered.            “That Spellbinder’s an old wives’ tale,” Theron said and shook his head. It was not real, none of it.            Sobriina’s eyes darkened. “What if it is true! Something is shady and sinister within Wraith’s Hollow. Even the meager horses sensed it! Whatever it was could have made her someone else. Or, taken a piece of her glassy heart away! Even placed a darkness into her core self.”Theron lifted his chin and eyed his friend.            “You are suggesting . . .” Elshender’s eyes narrowed. “Lord Demus changed the woman? I thought you were smarter than that!”            “Possibly,” Sobriina said, then gasped. “Possibly before you even set your eyes on her, my prince! How are we to know if Olivia is truly who she claims to be, even from the beginning? There might have never been a girl named Olivia—”            “Enough of this!” Theron slammed his fist on the table and rattled the oil bowl. The two silently sat back in their chairs. “I asked for your advice, not a child’s tale!”            Sobriina raised her head and looked the prince in the eyes. “Lord Demus did this.”Theron held her gaze, but did not reply.            “How are you sure?” Elshender questioned with a smirk.            Sobriina took in a deep breath. “What other explanation lies before us?”            “She ate something wrong, and that’s what’s making her different,” Theron said, his eyes darkened.            “Her new skin, or way of being, began the moment Wraith’s Hollow lay behind us. Something happened between the trees of gray; I am convinced.”“Obviously!” Theron scoffed.Sobriina’s eyes narrowed. “A side of you wonders if my words are true. It frightens you. That is the only reason you disagree; there is no other.”Theron’s jaw clenched as his eyes darkened still. “I disagree because it’s ludicrous!” He turned away, seething with clammy hands. Sobriina and Elshender watched him, and Theron felt the weight of their stares. He cleared his throat and sat back in his chair. Maybe Sobriina’s right.“Then test her.” Sobriina relaxed in her seat. “Test her and see.”Theron closed his eyes and ran his fingers through his hair. He stared at the oil flame and watched as it flickered without a sound. He sat in silence and the other two waited. Theron lifted his chin and breathed out a slow hiss, nodding. “A test, then.”Sobriina grinned.Elshender leaned forward. “What? What is it?”“And how can we lend a hand?” Sobriina added.


___________________________________

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 “We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.”
~ 2 Corinthians 4:7Our hearts are fragile.
Fragile like glass.
Hearts of glass.

If you have any comments, critiques, or concerns, please comment below!!!

Help! I'm Depressed and Don't Know What to Do!!! Part I

Depression used to be a taboo, but now it seems quite prevalent.It is something everyone seems to struggle with in today's modern era. I mustbe honest with you, depression is something I have rarely faced throughout mylife. However, things have changed. For the first time, I have been feelingthat looming monster of depression creep up behind me like an encouragingstocker. It is a very ruthless master, for once in has you stuck in its snareit is almost impossible to overcome.Emphasis on almost.
I have recently faced this well renowned enemy called depression. I felt like Iwas being dragged down into a dark, bottomless pit. It’s very cold down there,very lonely. Nothing I did seemed to matter and everything was a monotonous ratrace from one scheduled event to another. Everyone was smiling on their Facebookpages while I'm stuck in my pit wondering if my ambitions are worth pursuing,if this life has any meaning, and if I am even worth fighting for. 
I would like to share with you how I overcome depression. I am not a physiologist.I am not trained in this field. I am not diagnosed with clinical depression. I’ma fantasy write who has lived life, been beaten down, and learned how to riseup again. I am by no means trying to force my views on you, I'm simply givingyou an option of how to make a ladder to climb out of your own pit.

1. Admit I am depressed.

I am the queen of denial. It is very difficult for me to admitdefeat. When I finally suck it up and lay down my pride, I acknowledge I’mdepressed. I can never change unless I know something is wrong. I don't thinkI'm a prideful person, but when it comes to admitting my faults I see howprideful I truly am. I'll be honest, admitting this isn't fun or easy. Butnothing in life worth fighting for comes easily.

2. I Don’t Ignore the Problem

I usually do this really "logical thing" and instead of dealing withthe problem I saturate my days with things that make me feel good. It soundsquite fun, but the pain never leaves. That's not how you would treat a brokenarm, ignoring the pain until you are so familiar with it, it is now numb andnot a nuisance. However, that’s what I do with my emotional pain. It just hurtstoo much to face it. Way too much. But ignoring a broken arm won’t fix it. In fact, itwill make more problems that would hinder me in the future. So, after I findout, once again, that feeling good does not erase pain it simply buries medeeper in the pit of depression, I decide to do something about it.

3. Discovering Depression Roots

Next, I need to discover what brought about my depression. What happenedto make me think these dark and dreary thoughts? How was I hurt? Who and/orwhat hurt me? For me, most of my despair and depression comes from intenseemotional pain I experience.
I'm a devout Christian. (Again, I am NOT trying to impose my values on you. Iam simply stating what has helped me.) As a Christian, I have been taught to “givemy anxieties to God because he cares for me.” (1 Peter 5:7) That’s very goodand healthy, but sometimes I’m buried by such a big mountain of pain I’m notstrong enough to left it up and give it to God. I simply get press down by moreand more pain.

Understand, it’s not that God has failed me, it is because I don'ttrust him to take care of the pain for me.

But why would I give my pain to God? What’s He going to do for mewhen it feels like He’s not saving me? Well, He draws near to thebrokenhearted, binds up their wounds, heals them, and saves them. (Psalms34:18, 147:3) Isn’t that what we’re all looking for? A comforter? (. . . God of all comfort, who comforts us in our affliction - 2 Corinthians1:3-5) A healer? (I [God] will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant pace and security - Jeremiah 33:6) And someone to rescue us? (Do not be afraid - I [God] will save you. I have called you by name-you are Mine - Isaiah 43:1)
4. Let Myself Feel

After I discovered what the cause of my pain is, I can moreefficiently deal with my depression. This is when I try and suck it up and askGod for help. I'd like to say I humbly get on my knees as angels start singingand a light from heaven shines down on me. What really happens is because I'm soscared, mad, and confused I scream horrid cuss words, hoping no one’saround to hear me, and that I'm not ticking God off too much. I will admit, Ido not swear in real life, but I sometimes pray like a sailor so to speak. Godis the Savior of my soul, the reason I live, therefore he should see myugly, unpleasant side in vivid picture. There's a fine balance betweenrespecting God by being humble at his feet and being uncensored, messy, andlost. He likes to hear form us, even the gorse, ugly things. Because of this, we can confidently approach God. "If we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that He ears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of Him." (1 John 5:14-15)  He wouldn't havebeen tortured and killed on your behalf just to let you suffer and trudgethrough the grime of life without Him there protecting you and fighting foryou.After turning to God and admitting I can’t do life alone, I seekhelp from someone who is not emotionally imbalanced and who is wiser thanmyself. Or, just a friend who I can vent to and we can sort through myoff-the-handle emotions together. This is the time to feel all the feels, tocry all the tears, to scream whatever needs to come out. Let go. Be real. Bebroken. It’s messy, so be with someone you trust in a safe environment. Trustme, it’ll be okay.
This is half the steps I take when facing depression. Now is the time for you to sit back, consider what you've just learned, and act on it if you're so inclined. I strongly encourage you to. I'll post Part II next Wednesday. Until then, be brave and dare to admit you are depressed, don't ignore the problem, discover what caused the depression, and find an adviser/trusted friend to cry/scream with. Don't forget to ask God for help, He's the only one who really can heal anyways.
Hang in there. Its not over yet. 

:)

Help! I'm Depressed and Don't Know What to Do!!! Part I

Depression used to be a taboo, but now it seems quite prevalent. It is something everyone seems to struggle with in today's modern era. I must be honest with you, depression is something I have rarely faced throughout my life. However, things have changed. For the first time, I have been feeling that looming monster of depression creep up behind me like an encouraging stocker. It is a very ruthless master, for once in has you stuck in its snare it is almost impossible to overcome. Emphasis on almost.
I have recently faced this well renowned enemy called depression. I felt like I was being dragged down into a dark, bottomless pit. It’s very cold down there, very lonely. Nothing I did seemed to matter and everything was a monotonous rat race from one scheduled event to another. Everyone was smiling on their Facebook pages while I'm stuck in my pit wondering if my ambitions are worth pursuing, if this life has any meaning, and if I am even worth fighting for. 
I would like to share with you how I overcome depression. I am not a physiologist. I am not trained in this field. I am not diagnosed with clinical depression. I’m a fantasy write who has lived life, been beaten down, and learned how to rise up again. I am by no means trying to force my views on you, I'm simply giving you an option of how to make a ladder to climb out of your own pit.
1. Admit I am depressed.I am the queen of denial. It is very difficult for me to admit defeat. When I finally suck it up and lay down my pride, I acknowledge I’m depressed. I can never change unless I know something is wrong. I don't think I'm a prideful person, but when it comes to admitting my faults I see how prideful I truly am. I'll be honest, admitting this isn't fun or easy. But nothing in life worth fighting for comes easily.

2. I Don’t Ignore the ProblemI usually do this really "logical thing" and instead of dealing with the problem I saturate my days with things that make me feel good. It sounds quite fun, but the pain never leaves. That's not how you would treat a broken arm, ignoring the pain until you are so familiar with it, it is now numb and not a nuisance. However, that’s what I do with my emotional pain. It just hurts too much to face it. Way too much. But ignoring a broken arm won’t fix it. In fact, it will make more problems that would hinder me in the future. So, after I find out, once again, that feeling good does not erase pain it simply buries me deeper in the pit of depression, I decide to do something about it.
3. Discovering Depression RootsNext, I need to discover what brought about my depression. What happened to make me think these dark and dreary thoughts? How was I hurt? Who and/or what hurt me? For me, most of my despair and depression comes from intense emotional pain I experience.
I'm a devout Christian. (Again, I am NOT trying to impose my values on you. I am simply stating what has helped me.) As a Christian, I have been taught to “give my anxieties to God because he cares for me.” (1 Peter 5:7) That’s very good and healthy, but sometimes I’m buried by such a big mountain of pain I’m not strong enough to left it up and give it to God. I simply get press down by more and more pain. Understand, it’s not that God has failed me, it is because I don't trust him to take care of the pain for me. But why would I give my pain to God? What’s He going to do for me when it feels like He’s not saving me? Well, He draws near to the brokenhearted, binds up their wounds, heals them, and saves them. (Psalms34:18, 147:3) Isn’t that what we’re all looking for? A comforter? (. . . God of all comfort, who comforts us in our affliction - 2 Corinthians1:3-5) A healer? (I [God] will heal my people and will let them enjoy abundant pace and security - Jeremiah 33:6) And someone to rescue us? (Do not be afraid - I [God] will save you. I have called you by name-you are Mine - Isaiah 43:1)
4. Let Myself FeelAfter I discovered what the cause of my pain is, I can more efficiently deal with my depression. This is when I try and suck it up and ask God for help. I'd like to say I humbly get on my knees as angels start singing and a light from heaven shines down on me. What really happens is because I'm so scared, mad, and confused I scream horrid cuss words, hoping no one’s around to hear me, and that I'm not ticking God off too much. I will admit, I do not swear in real life, but I sometimes pray like a sailor so to speak. God is the Savior of my soul, the reason I live, therefore he should see my ugly, unpleasant side in vivid picture. There's a fine balance between respecting God by being humble at his feet and being uncensored, messy, and lost. He likes to hear form us, even the gorse, ugly things. Because of this, we can confidently approach God. "If we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that He ears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of Him." (1 John 5:14-15)  He wouldn't have been tortured and killed on your behalf just to let you suffer and trudge through the grime of life without Him there protecting you and fighting for you.After turning to God and admitting I can’t do life alone, I seek help from someone who is not emotionally imbalanced and who is wiser than myself. Or, just a friend who I can vent to and we can sort through my off-the-handle emotions together. This is the time to feel all the feels, to cry all the tears, to scream whatever needs to come out. Let go. Be real. Be broken. It’s messy, so be with someone you trust in a safe environment. Trust me, it’ll be okay.
This is half the steps I take when facing depression. Now is the time for you to sit back, consider what you've just learned, and act on it if you're so inclined. I strongly encourage you to. I'll post Part II next Wednesday. Until then, be brave and dare to admit you are depressed, don't ignore the problem, discover what caused the depression, and find an adviser/trusted friend to cry/scream with. Don't forget to ask God for help, He's the only one who really can heal anyways.
Hang in there. Its not over yet. 

:)

Help! I'm Depressed and Don't Know What to Do!!! Part II

The other day, I wrote about my first few steps in facing depression. First, I admit I'm depressed, I don't ignore the problem, I discover what my depression is rooted in, and let myself feel. How did it go for you in taking these steps? Was it hard? Yeah, it's always hard for me too. But it's worth it. (Because you're worth it.)

Here are the last few steps I take. Hope this is helpful for you.

5. Focusing on Change

Once I receive advice from a wise counselor and/or sorted through my emotions with my trusted friend, I have reached one of the most challenging stages of facing depression: I must now change. Instead of overloading my life with things that make me feel good, I must focus my time and thoughts on the truth. I believe the truth of God's word, therefore I lean on what God has said about my future and my identity.

I am loved with an unchanging love that lasts forever. (Psalm 136:26)I have a God who's obsessed with my well being. He's happily with me, gladly rejoicing, and calming me with His love. He will encourage me with singing. (Zephaniah 3:17) I have a hope filled future full of prosperity. (Jeremiah 29:11)If I hold onto my trust in God, I am blameless, holy, and free from accusations. (Colossians 1:21-23) 
There must be a distinct separation between how I feel and what is real. Pain is real. It cannot be ignored or thrown out of the way. However, pain should not overcome my life. The only time I fully feel the despairing pain is when I am with my wise adviser and/or trusted friend. Once everything is vented and expressed, it is time for me to flight and hold onto the truth and the facts instead of how I feel.

Did you catch that word? I wrote fight for a reason. Fighting is work. Fighting takes time. But you're worth fighting for. (Just nod your head even if you don't believe it. My God died a criminal's execution, went to hell, and battled death for you! You're completely worth fighting for!!! Because your worth is not in who you are, what you did/do, how you feel, and so on. You're wroth is based on what Jesus did for you and your decision to follow Him. (Romans 3)

6. Confront, if NeededNow, because I am holding fast to the truth and facts, hopefully with my feet a little bit under myself, it is time to confront. If my depression is rooted in a hurt inflicted by another person, I need to face that person. Not to kill them. Not to make they suffer (although sometimes that would be fun >:) ) I confront to respect the other person and respect myself. What if they have no clue they wounded me so deeply? It's obvious to me, but it may not be to them. I'm always afraid to do this part. Every time. I practice what I'm going to say so that it doesn't come across as attacking or vengeful. (This is because I suck at verbal communication. If you are the type to plan ahead and strategies what their response will be and make an answer based on your made up response, don't plan out your conversation. Playing the 'What If' game will hype you up, stress you out, make it worse, so by the time you confront the person, you're ready to bight their head off before they say a word.)I try to say "I feel" instead of "you did____". I prefix the conversation by stating I don't want to fight, I want to make peace, and I apologize if I say anything disrespectful/unloving I may say. Sometimes a mediator is needed. That's okay. A good mediator would be your wise adviser and/or trusted friend. Don't gang up on them now. Be civil. Be mature. Be uninfluenced by your emotions. (I usually cry a lot though. And maybe yell. And cuss a bit. So . . . I'm still working on the mature part of confronting.)I have to do this process more then once because more pain resurfaces the more I reveal it. I may have several conversations with the same person to make peace or have to return to my wise adviser/trusted friend and vent and cry again. And that's okay. I just cannot let myself give up.   
7. Intentionally be Unselfish  While I'm fighting to hold onto the truth, I usually discover I've been very selfish. My depression is always accompanied with selfishness. Therefore, I try to go out of my way to be selfless. I attend to my pets and plants (it's amazing how needy they can be!) I give my husband a message, ask how I can serve him after he worked all day, and try to encourage him. I also tell him what I've been struggling with and ask him to encourage me and reassure me I'm loved. I volunteer to help out at different functions. I also surround myself with uplifting, undepressed people.
8. Repeat steps 4-8 Until FreedI don't isolated myself.
I don't let myself think my efforts are hopeless.
I don't continually complain, both to others and within my thoughts.
I refuse to let the bad that happened ruin the good that is happening now. I acknowledge how I feel, yet understand feelings are not truth. 
I fight. 
I continue to the end. THE VERY END. Like, months down the rode. Years even. It takes what it takes and you'll get there.
And, with God's strength, I succeed. 
Beating depression takes time. It took a long time to be sucked into the grimy pit, it will take a long time to climb out. Don't get frustrated if you're not "getting over it" faster then you think you should. Everyone has their own pace of progression. As long as you are progressing bit by bit out of depression, you’re doing it right.
So, that's what works for me to rise above depression. It takes a lot of people. It takes a lot of work. It takes a lot of trust in God. 
I hope this works for you. You are worth fighting for. You do not have to be conquered by how you feel. You can rise up. You can be free. You are worthy of love and honor. You are not defined by what you do, but by who you follow. Follow God. He won't get grossed out by your pit of depression. He's an expert in going into dark, horrid places, because the Light always shines the best in the dark. I'll leave you with this encouragement that lifted me out of my own pits countless times:
I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in Him.
Psalm 40:1-3



I believe in you because I believe in my God and He's eager to fight for you. He always is. (Exodus 14:14)

Help! I'm Depressed and Don't Know What to Do!!! Part II

The other day, I wrote about my first few steps in facing depression. First, I admit I'm depressed, I don't ignore the problem, I discover what my depression is rooted in, and let myself feel. How did it go for you in taking these steps? Was it hard? Yeah, it's always hard for me too. But it's worth it. (Because you're worth it.)

Here are the last few steps I take. Hope this is helpful for you.

5. Focusing on ChangeOnce I receive advice from a wise counselor and/or sorted through my emotions with my trusted friend, I have reached one of the most challenging stages of facing depression: I must now change. Instead of overloading my life with things that make me feel good, I must focus my time and thoughts on the truth. I believe the truth of God's word, therefore I lean on what God has said about my future and my identity.I am loved with an unchanging love that lasts forever. (Psalm 136:26)I have a God who's obsessed with my well being. He's happily with me, gladly rejoicing, and calming me with His love. He will encourage me with singing. (Zephaniah 3:17) I have a hope filled future full of prosperity. (Jeremiah 29:11)If I hold onto my trust in God, I am blameless, holy, and free from accusations. (Colossians 1:21-23) 
There must be a distinct separation between how I feel and what is real. Pain is real. It cannot be ignored or thrown out of the way. However, pain should not overcome my life. The only time I fully feel the despairing pain is when I am with my wise adviser and/or trusted friend. Once everything is vented and expressed, it is time for me to flight and hold onto the truth and the facts instead of how I feel.Did you catch that word? I wrote fight for a reason. Fighting is work. Fighting takes time. But you're worth fighting for. (Just nod your head even if you don't believe it. My God died a criminal's execution, went to hell, and battled death for you! You're completely worth fighting for!!! Because your worth is not in who you are, what you did/do, how you feel, and so on. You're wroth is based on what Jesus did for you and your decision to follow Him. (Romans 3)
6. Confront, if NeededNow, because I am holding fast to the truth and facts, hopefully with my feet a little bit under myself, it is time to confront. If my depression is rooted in a hurt inflicted by another person, I need to face that person. Not to kill them. Not to make they suffer (although sometimes that would be fun >:) ) I confront to respect the other person and respect myself. What if they have no clue they wounded me so deeply? It's obvious to me, but it may not be to them. I'm always afraid to do this part. Every time. I practice what I'm going to say so that it doesn't come across as attacking or vengeful. (This is because I suck at verbal communication. If you are the type to plan ahead and strategies what their response will be and make an answer based on your made up response, don't plan out your conversation. Playing the 'What If' game will hype you up, stress you out, make it worse, so by the time you confront the person, you're ready to bight their head off before they say a word.)I try to say "I feel" instead of "you did____". I prefix the conversation by stating I don't want to fight, I want to make peace, and I apologize if I say anything disrespectful/unloving I may say. Sometimes a mediator is needed. That's okay. A good mediator would be your wise adviser and/or trusted friend. Don't gang up on them now. Be civil. Be mature. Be uninfluenced by your emotions. (I usually cry a lot though. And maybe yell. And cuss a bit. So . . . I'm still working on the mature part of confronting.)I have to do this process more then once because more pain resurfaces the more I reveal it. I may have several conversations with the same person to make peace or have to return to my wise adviser/trusted friend and vent and cry again. And that's okay. I just cannot let myself give up.   
7. Intentionally be Unselfish  While I'm fighting to hold onto the truth, I usually discover I've been very selfish. My depression is always accompanied with selfishness. Therefore, I try to go out of my way to be selfless. I attend to my pets and plants (it's amazing how needy they can be!) I give my husband a message, ask how I can serve him after he worked all day, and try to encourage him. I also tell him what I've been struggling with and ask him to encourage me and reassure me I'm loved. I volunteer to help out at different functions. I also surround myself with uplifting, undepressed people.
8. Repeat steps 4-8 Until FreedI don't isolated myself.
I don't let myself think my efforts are hopeless.
I don't continually complain, both to others and within my thoughts.
I refuse to let the bad that happened ruin the good that is happening now. I acknowledge how I feel, yet understand feelings are not truth. 
I fight. 
I continue to the end. THE VERY END. Like, months down the rode. Years even. It takes what it takes and you'll get there.
And, with God's strength, I succeed. 
Beating depression takes time. It took a long time to be sucked into the grimy pit, it will take a long time to climb out. Don't get frustrated if you're not "getting over it" faster then you think you should. Everyone has their own pace of progression. As long as you are progressing bit by bit out of depression, you’re doing it right.
So, that's what works for me to rise above depression. It takes a lot of people. It takes a lot of work. It takes a lot of trust in God. 
I hope this works for you. You are worth fighting for. You do not have to be conquered by how you feel. You can rise up. You can be free. You are worthy of love and honor. You are not defined by what you do, but by who you follow. Follow God. He won't get grossed out by your pit of depression. He's an expert in going into dark, horrid places, because the Light always shines the best in the dark. I'll leave you with this encouragement that lifted me out of my own pits countless times:
I waited patiently for the Lord; He turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; He set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in Him.
Psalm 40:1-3



I believe in you because I believe in my God and He's eager to fight for you. He always is. (Exodus 14:14)

"Shattered Lives" Chapter 12: The Wizard's Legacy book 1

Chapter 12Desperate Rescue“Theron!”Every muscle in the prince’s body stiffened. He stood on the edge of Savior’s Way, his back almost pressed against a tree. A burly man barred his way, mace in hand. He was covered in Han Ci armor, dark wood carved to fit the shape of his body. Sweat dripped from Theron’s brow as he held up his shield, his ears ringing from Olivia’s scream. He had to get to her, had to save her! What had forced him from her side? He could not remember.With a cry, he gritted his teeth and threw himself against his own shield. The fiend before him fell back against the blow with a startled shout. Theron ducked, the mace hurling overhead and scarcely missing him. He steadied his stance, tightened the grip on his sword, and lunged forward.The blade pierced between the wooden joints of armor. The man threw his head back and screamed, grasping at Theron’s embedded blade. Theron forced him to the ground and ripped his sword free without a second glance. He left the man where he lay, his widened eyes darting over the chaos. He turned to where Olivia’s cries had come from.He saw Elshender beside the wagon, upright and blades raised high. A wolf of sorts circled him, jaws open in a twisted smile. The two ladies-in-waiting were in tears and clung to one another under the wagon’s shadow. A lump formed in Theron’s throat. No Olivia.Fire leapt to his eyes and he charged through the chaos, sword up and shield down. The shouts and danger around him passed like a blur. He burst through the line of trees, senses alert and every nerve on edge. He blinked in the sudden shadows and tried to focus.“Olivia!” He saw and heard no one. His nostrils flared. Wizard, have mercy! He stepped forward and gritted his teeth. Something moved from behind a stout tree. Theron hurled around the trunk and a shout met his ears. The hard lines of his face softened and he lowered his sword. Olivia shivered as she recoiled on the ground, her hands raised.“It’s me! It’s me!” Theron gasped. He pulled her to her feet and looked her up and down. She could stand and, though fear clouded her eyes, she was not wounded or even bleeding. He placed her behind him, one hand holding his sword and his shielded arm holding her.An arrow whizzed by and struck the tree. The two dropped to the ground; Theron’s body sheltered hers. He looked between the underbrush and limbs and could scarcely see the battle. He watched his men hack at their enemies, the strangers crying out and falling back. Why had they come? They did not fight to steal their provisions. They did not seek out one person as headhunters would. Only mad men killed for sport. . . .then again, this was Wraith’s Hollow.A whistle shot above the din, sharp and sudden. The sound of muffled footfall met his ears, and then there was silence. His eyes narrowed and he stood, looking to Savior’s Way and saw only his men. The wild men were gone, as though they never were.Many bodies and abandoned weapons lay on the ground between blood-smeared grass. The wounded cried in pain, their hands grasping the lesions and gashes, covered in their own blood with their comrades kneeling to help. The injured wild men left behind were swiftly dealt with. The wood was quiet once again. The only sounds were the gasping breaths of the men-at-arms and the thud of hearts. Theron’s bunched muscles relaxed, and he lowered his dripping blade.“Theron . . .” Olivia whispered as tears poured down her ashen face. He drew her closer. “I thought . . . I—”“Shhh . . . don’t talk now.” Theron hushed her.Olivia’s bottom lip trembled. “Have they left? Are you certain?”“Yes.” Theron looked to the road. “We’re safe for the moment; the enemy has disappeared into the wood.”Olivia closed her eyes and her body collapsed. Theron grunted as he caught her. He picked her up and carried her out of the trees, avoiding the grabbing branches as best he could. As they emerged, a squire half drew his bow, but stopped once he recognized them. The prince gave him a wary look, and the boy ducked away.Theron stepped over a body and past hacked remains to an open spot amid the ruins of battle. He lowered himself and Olivia onto Savior’s Way, her head leaning against his chest. Cedany crawled out from under the wagon and pulled Krea out behind her. She fetched her lady water and knelt at her side as Krea went to Elshender and began to bandage his clawed shoulder between sniffles. She kept looking up to the sky, the men, and the treetops, but never down to the death and blood at her feet.Theron leaned down and kissed Olivia’s head. He closed his eyes and breathed in her scent. Thank You, he said to The Wizard. He heaved a deep sigh. Thank You. He stood and glanced at Cedany. “Watch her.”“I knew you would come.”Theron looked down and found Olivia watching him. Theron swallowed and turned away, unable to speak. He managed a nod and motioned to Elshender before he said something foolish. “We must continue on,” he said and cleared his throat. “We are almost out of Wraith’s Hollow.”“Thank the Powers,” Olivia whispered and closed her eyes.Theron’s brows creased as he glanced at her, but he said nothing. Countess Primis rushed to Olivia and looked down at her, heaving a sigh and laying a hand over her chest. Her perfect hair was now in wild strands, and her green kirtle was stained by mud and someone’s blood.“I’m quite all right,” Olivia whispered.“Well, I can see that,” Primis said. She turned to Earl Quinn as he cleaned his sword, his brow lined by a grazed blow. “She is fine!” she called and turned to Theron. “I am glad she is well, my prince. Aren’t you?”Theron glanced at her, yet did not respond.“What a horrid thing if the poor child died! You would have to find another wife and terminate our contract, now wouldn’t you?”The prince lifted his chin and faced her. “I have no intentions of cheating you out of our agreement,” he said. “She is safe because I went after her—”“Why were you not by her side in the first place, my prince?” Countess Primis’s eyes pierced through his shield. “One would think you dislike our arrangement.”“I approve of our agreement and contract,” he said through gritted teeth. “You have no reason to question my loyalty.”Countess Primis bowed low and stepped back. “Very well, my prince.” She turned and joined Earl Quinn without another word or look to Olivia.Theron’s fists clenched as he shook his head. He turned to Elshender, his eyes darkened by fury. “Where is Olivia’s bodyguard? Where were you? I ordered you to watch them!” With a hushed gasp, Krea drew back and wiped her tears.Elshender looked at his prince, and then away. “The bodyguard’s dead, and a werewolf stopped me.”Theron lifted his chin as his eyes narrowed.Sobriina approached, her blood-tipped swords still drawn, and a few cuts slashed across her shoulders and side. “Is my lady safely held?” the she-elf asked, oblivious to the men’s tension.Elshender stooped to a knee and lowered his head. “Forgive me, my lord.”Theron’s icy gaze did not waver.Sobriina stopped and bit her tongue.“Do not punish him, my lord,” Olivia whispered. “He . . . he is a honorable man.”Theron gritted his teeth, then sighed and looked away. “Arise.” He ran his fingers through his hair and stepped back. Elshender stood and bowed to the couple, looking to Theron as his eyes asked for pardon. Theron nodded ever so slightly, and his right-hand man turned to attend to the knights and squires.“Where is my Nan?” Olivia whispered.Cedany and Sobriina exchanged looks, their shoulders drooping. “My lady.” Sobriina laid a hand on her shoulder. “She is at peace and well in the Land of Eternal Day. I am deeply sorry.”Theron looked at Olivia and pursed his mouth shut. He stepped back, for he knew that if he tried to soothe her grief, it would only make things worse.Olivia’s brow creased as she looked Sobriina in the eyes, and turned her gloomy gaze upward. She nodded. “Very well . . .”Theron’s head cocked to one side and he looked away. Did she hear Sobriina right? Nan was dead; he had thought Olivia viewed her as a mother. With a shrug, he cleared his throat. It’s her own way of mourning, he concluded and turned his attention to his men.–                 –                 –Savior’s Way continued on and on as though without end. Theron stared ahead, his hand on his sword and eyes out the window of the wagon. No one moved as tree after tree passed by. The moans of wounded men rose up now and then, followed by hushes from their comrades. Sweat glistened from the horses’ necks as their wide black eyes stared every which way.A muffled sound drifted from the distance, and all looked ahead in silence. It was a rhythmic noise that piped up loud then soft. It was joined by others as they rounded a bend. Theron stared on, and his eyes narrowed. What was that sound? He had heard it before, long ago, it seemed.“Birds . . .” Sobriina whispered. He glanced to the Lunaris and found a smile beaming across her face. “The songs of birds.”Theron’s hold of his sword relaxed. The trees of Wraith’s Hollow lessened, and finally gave way to light. Bit by bit, rays of sunshine fought through the underbrush and cast golden pools on Savior’s Way. A wave of excitement filled the weary travelers as the world beyond came into view.The Hilled Country opened up before them. The rolling land’s birds soared through the air in wide arcs. Shadows yielded to miles and miles of open green land that met the blue sky with a gentle touch. Creamy clouds wafted overhead, although those to the west billowed gray and promised rain. Crickets chirped from the waves of grass, and quail called to one another as they sprang from their ground nests.Theron heard Olivia sigh beside him. He looked to her as her body relaxed, and she sank back against the wagon’s cushion. She half closed her eyes, and a smile pulled at her rosy lips. Theron leaned back as well, but did not let go of his sword.The servants smiled and whispered their relief to one another. The knights nudged their squires and said they had done well in the dark wood. The few wounded, who lay on makeshift cots dragged behind the horses, relaxed and closed their eyes now that they could truly rest. Countess Primis smiled to herself, and Earl Quinn sat in silence, his eyes directed ahead. Even the horses lifted their heads and turned their ears forward.“We shall arrive at Henricien in due time,” Duke Aldret said as he and the others of nobility sat in the carriage. No one responded, and Olivia rested against Theron. Sobriina mended a gash in her forearm, and tried not to flinch as she wiped the blood away.Olivia turned in her seat and looked out the window back to Wraith’s Hollow. Her brow was wrinkled and her eyes downcast. She swallowed hard.“Are you all right?” Theron asked.“Oh!” Olivia flinched, then smiled. “Quite . . . I’m fine.”Theron’s eyes narrowed, though he smiled and rubbed her hand.“We are all overjoyed for your well-being, my lady.” Sobriina grinned and nodded. “We must not let our eyes look back. And as for Nan . . .” Olivia looked down and sighed. “That motherly elder is well and alive in The Land of Eternal Day. Nay, let us fix our eyes on you and your love. The union is close at hand.”“Yes,” Olivia said and ducked her head. She smiled. Theron studied her complexion. He wondered if it was a real smile.–                 –                 –Henricien was the most populated city in Tulaun. The city was atop the southernmost edge of Blue Ridge, the mountainside that jutted from the northeastern borders toward the Hilled Country. The city itself sat on Riget Peak, and the cliff was crowned with leafy trees, moss, and flowers. The high wall of the mountain guarded the eastern city walls and kept attackers at bay.The Cut, a great mountain river, flowed from the peaks, cut through rock and land, and curved down through the heart of the city. A great cliff, Sky Crag, guarded the western wall of Henricien, and The Cut flowed off its jagged end. It fell from Sky Crag and plummeted down like the thunder of horses. The waterfall, named Great Wonder, was the most powerful waterfall in that half of the world.The city walls loomed high above every traveler, the time-worn stone face firm against the centuries. Solid battlements loomed on every turn, and archers leaned over the side, eyes peeled and arrows on their strings. Over the edge of the wall, the towered heights of the royal castle could be seen.The sheer road which led to Henricien was watched by men-at-arms on horseback. Centaurs guarded alongside them; their half-horse, half-man bodies rippled with each stride. The road, Harnd’s Way, named after the great king who built it, was customarily filled with travelers. Today, however, people stood to either side of the road with flowers and colored cloths in their hands. The road was lined with flags upon high poles, the red fabrics billowing in the breeze. All waited for the betrothed couple’s arrival.Lady Olivia looked out the window with a smile that shimmered. After days of traveling across the Hilled Country, Tulaun’s endless rolling grasslands, she was ecstatic to at last see Blue Ridge and Henricien towering gates. Olivia faced Harnd’s Way and eyed each commoner who had come in hopes of seeing her. A cheer lifted from the mass and they waved their cloths and flowers. Olivia laughed. “This is quite spectacular!”“They’re all here for you,” Theron said with a grin.As they entered the city, bells rang from the highest towers and proclaimed that the prince and their future queen had come home. The day-to-day activities had stopped, and the people lined the streets, longing to catch a glimpse of their prince’s bride. Children and dogs danced before the caravan as they laughed and shouted to one another. The young women threw flower petals down upon the street, and many began to play the flute or fiddle. As the wagon continued, Theron heard shouts of praise from the onlookers.“Long live the queen!”“Long life for the two!”“Blessings! Blessings of love and loyalty!”“The Wizard be near!”Olivia smiled at the many people assembled to see her. “They are wonderful!” she cried with a look to Theron. He grinned and glanced out his own window. By the time they reached Beating Heart, the royal castle at the center of Henricien, the entire city was in the streets with shouts, dancing, laughter, music, and rejoicing. The iron gates to Beating Heart opened, and the caravan entered its courtyard. The common people stood outside, though their cheers did not lessen.The carriages stopped and everyone stepped out with stiff legs. The horses looked around, though their heads were lowered in relief, knowing they were home at last. The wounded laughed, some cried, and the castle’s servants rushed to their aid.Earl Quinn offered a hand to Countess Primis, but she brushed it away and stepped out on her own. He shot her a cold look and walked on without her. Theron helped Sobriina out of the carriage, then Olivia. He watched as she looked around, mouth open in awe.“Welcome,” he said, “to your new home.” Most of the Outer Courtyard’s mud had been dragged away, and the stone buildings had been washed. Horse stalls lined the wall and fresh, red banners had been hung down the highest towers.A host of the most valiant knights, their weapons and armor polished, stood on either side of the entrance. A crowd of royal men, women, and a few creatures waited for the couple’s arrival. There were lords and ladies, advisors, generals, and Seers, each dressed in fine robes of grays and blues, with reds or greens wound into belts of silver and leather. Veils drifted behind the women as each eyed Lady Olivia and whispered among themselves.In the midst of the throng were two figures, each robed in purple and gold. Crowns encircled their snowy white heads. The couple was none other than King Matthias and Queen Ellis. Hard lines curved along these two faces, though their heads were raised and eyes were directed to the queen-to-be. A grin blossomed on Queen Ellis’s face and King Matthias’s eyes smiled, though his mouth did not. The gathering greeted them with faces aglow as servant boys blew trumpets.“Welcome home!”“Prince! Our prince has come!”“How was the journey?”“Wraith’s Hollow; oh, that dreadful place! What was it like?”“Welcome a thousand times!”“Life was not the same without you, Prince Theron!”It was a tremendous welcome, indeed.Theron glanced at his father and the old man looked his way, their eyes meeting for a brief moment. Theron turned away and cleared his throat as he held his arm to Olivia. What if he did not approve of Olivia? What if she was not queenly enough? He shook his head; it did not matter. Olivia mattered. And how was she? Afraid, no doubt. Terrified to meet her nation’s king and queen . . .His eyes widened. Olivia looked at the royal two, smiled, and lifted her chin high. Theron blinked as he watched her. Countess Primis grinned and whispered to Earl Quinn. He nodded and eyed Olivia. Theron and Olivia walked through the throng toward his parents, Olivia’s back straight and eyes alive. The cheers stilled as they reached them.“My son,” Queen Ellis said and she walked toward him.Theron dropped to one knee, took her hand, and kissed it. “Hello, Mother. It’s nice to be home.” Ellis smiled and smoothed her boy’s hair. King Matthias listened, but did not move toward his son.“Oh . . . how I have missed you!” The queen helped him to his feet and kissed his cheek. Theron glanced at his father; the king sniffed and lifted his chin. Theron’s eyes darted away and he cleared his throat once more. Queen Ellis stepped back and turned to Olivia. “And who is this rare find, my son?” Olivia beamed as the two came together and took hands.“This, Mother, is Lady Olivia.”“Charming child—”“I see why you favor her, boy,” King Matthias said. Theron looked to him; a muscle in his jaw flexed. “She is pleasant on the eyes. . . .” The king stroked his white beard with a playful grin. Olivia glanced at him, and her smile wavered.“My lord!” Queen Ellis whispered.Theron grunted and stepped forward. “Father, she is a lady.” His hands, though held behind him, balled into fists. “She will be treated as such.”King Matthias turned and faced his son. Their eyes locked. “Oh, look at that!” King Matthias jabbed a finger into Theron’s chest. “What a valiant man of honor! Protecting his possessions! And what is your response to this . . . this loyalty, my girl?”Olivia glanced at Theron, her eyes smiling still, and looked back at the king. “That I shall repay the favor in full, my king.”The women stayed quiet as the men held each other’s gaze. A hushed murmur rippled through the gathered crowd; it was not the first time the king and prince had challenged each other. Theron grimaced and looked away. Matthias held his head high and pulled his eyes from his son. He turned to Olivia and took her hands with his ringed fingers. “Ah, you shall be a fine daughter. I know my grandsons will be strong and bold, coming from you. No thanks to this son of mine . . .”Theron’s nostrils flared as Matthias kissed Olivia’s hand. The old man stepped back and turned to Beating Heart’s entrance. “Come.” He walked toward the castle and the crowd followed. Theron gave him a cold sideways glance as he passed.Queen Ellis took her son’s arm and drew close to him. “Do not let him hinder this happy time,” she whispered and stroked his arm. “He’s just an old and tired man.”Theron gritted his teeth; his father had always acted like this. Had he always been old and tired? Is that what it was to be king? He shook his head and tried to turn his mind to different matters.Olivia grabbed his other arm, and Theron escorted his mother and fiancée up the stone steps to Beating Heart. The assembly made their way with murmurs and pattering feet. The queen stroked Theron’s arm and turned to Duke Aldret, who walked behind them. “How was the trek, old friend?”“What a dreary question.” King Matthias glanced back at his wife, though she ignored him. “You are aware they were attacked.”“Eventful, my queen,” Duke Aldret answered plainly.“And your men?” Queen Ellis looked to Theron. “Casualties?”Theron nodded. “Three dead, seven wounded—”“Numbers too low to speak of.” King Matthias stroked his beard.Theron shot him a cold look. But they are my men,he thought, though he held his tongue.“And you, my dear?” Queen Ellis touched Olivia’s hand. “How are you after such a trying time?”Olivia turned away, eyes swelling with grief, as she gulped before replying. “A maid.” Her voice was hushed. “She was dear to me . . .”Matthias’s eyes narrowed as he looked back at Olivia. “What is she muttering about?” Theron glared at him.“I lost a maid.” Olivia shook her head as she blinked back tears. “Her body was never discovered.”Ellis’s brow creased with dark lines and she patted the young girl’s hand. “I’m sorry, love.”“What creed was this woman?” King Matthias said. “I shall have her replaced. What was her appearance?”Olivia looked at him. “Ah . . . She was from Barcen Way. Short. Dark skin, dark eyes. A wild lock of gray hair. Strong and—”“The likes of a Wilder!” King Matthias stopped and stared at Earl Quinn, his eyes narrowed. “You permitted a Wilder into your home! Such a description is that of Shade Kin!”“Nay, my king. Never!” Earl Quinn held the old man’s gaze, then flashed his upon Olivia. She stepped closer to Theron. “Wilders only enter my gates to be killed! I know the ways of a Wilder; Nan behaved far from their barbaric habits, my king.”Sobriina looked between the two men and stepped forward with a bow. “I do not believe Lady Olivia should speak of such horrid events.” King Matthias’s dark gaze softened and he stepped back. “Our dear lady has suffered a traumatic experience and I suggest that she not be questioned on such matters, with all due respect, my lord and king.”Olivia nodded and looked down. “Indeed.” Her voice was low and frail as she glanced between Sobriina and King Matthias. “I would approve of that.”King Matthias lifted his chin. “Very well, my daughter.” He nodded his snowy head. “None shall speak of it, and you shan’t have to share.”“Thank you greatly.”They entered the Great Hall, the towering stone walls adorned with detailed tapestries and hides of wild animals, ancient weapons gleaming in the firelight and men-at-arms posted periodically. Servants rushed to and fro, and the hall gave way to room after room, each furnished with finery and items handcrafted by delicate fingers. Fire licked from the torches and several fireplaces throughout the castle. For the moment, the constant chill had subsided.“Well,” Queen Ellis said as they continued walking, “to lighten the spirits, supper will be ready shortly.” She smiled and looked at Theron and Olivia. “And there is to be entertainment such as your youthful eyes have never seen!”Olivia smiled and giggled.“I would like that,” Theron said.“As would I!” Olivia nodded with a childish grin.Queen Ellis’s smile grew.“After the betrothal details are settled,” Earl Quinn muttered. “Yes? We still must discuss the contract. It shan’t take long, for it is a simple trade. This girl and one of my armies for royal titles and more land.”Kind Matthias nodded irritably and turned to the she-elf. “Mistress Sobriina, you are still responsible for this fair maiden’s needs.”“Your wish is my command.” She bowed. Olivia beamed, though her eyes did not. She looked away without a word.“Very well, daughter,” King Matthias said and took Olivia’s delicate hands into his veiny, speckled grasp. Theron lifted his chin and wanted to move his father away from his bride. “We shall see one another at supper.”“At supper.” Olivia grinned.“At supper,” Theron murmured. They parted, and Theron escorted Olivia to her room. Sobriina, Krea, Cedany, and the other servants who carried Olivia’s belongings walked close behind.Theron closed his eyes and took in a sharp breath. He told himself to forget his father and forced a smile. “They like you,” he whispered.“I am pleased, my prince,” Olivia said as they passed through a vast hall and climbed stairs. A stone lion sat with its eyes closed at the head of the stairwell.“Will you wish to bathe, my lady?” Sobriina asked.“Yes, um . . . with a vial of fine oil.”Theron’s eyes narrowed and he glanced at her. “Whatever for?”“It helps my skin.” Olivia looked up at him and smirked. She seemed to be amused by her words, but he did not know why. “It must be smooth and kept rightly. You understand.”“Yes . . .” They walked on in silence until they entered Olivia’s chamber. She gasped and laid a hand on her chest as her eyes darted from the fine bed to the golden candlesticks, to the small stained-glass window.Theron watched her with enjoyment. “Like it?” he asked.“Very much so! Thank you, forever and a day!” Olivia stepped closer to him and grabbed his shirt collar. Theron’s eyes widened as she drew him close and kissed him. Krea and Cedany smiled and looked away, though they stole a few peeks. Mistress Sobriina stood and stared, her eyes hard and her lips a thin line.Olivia finally withdrew and breathed out in a rush. Theron’s heart pounded through his whole being. They looked one another in the eyes and Olivia ran her fingers through his hair. “See you at supper,” she whispered and drew back. Words eluded Theron as he stepped away, his eyes fixed on her. He shut the door behind him, a smile alive in his eyes.Olivia sighed when the door shut. She turned and noticed Sobriina’s watchful gaze, her smile morphing to a darkened stare. “My bath.”Sobriina lifted her chin and eyed the lady. Olivia smirked and turned toward the full-length mirror of polished metal hanging on the wall. A muscle in Sobriina’s jaw clenched. “It will be prepared.” She walked toward the door. “And . . . your oil.”Olivia did not respond as she stood in different poses before the mirror. Krea and Cedany watched their lady, their heads tilted at an angle. Olivia saw their stares and shot a cold look at them. “Get out.” The two women stepped back. “Go!” Olivia waved a hand at them. “Shoo! Shoo!” The two servants left the room in a heartbeat.Olivia heaved a breath as she listened to the silence in the room. She scratched her forearm and turned back to the mirror with a grin and a lift of her chin. She ran her hand along her throat, chest, and side. She cupped her breasts and turned this way and that to see them better. She chuckled and nodded her head. “They’re good-sized, all right,” she muttered. “Give something for that lad to think of.”She scratched her forearm again and stepped closer to the mirror. With squinted, focused eyes, she inspected her nose and gingerly folded down her ear. A shadow crossed her brow and she growled. Pale stitch marks crisscrossed behind her ear along her skull. “Cursed skinner! Clumsy bonehead!” She shook her head and stepped back, her eyes fixed on her ear.Olivia muttered under her breath and looked away. She shook her head and glanced down at her forearm to scratch it. She hesitated and turned away with a heavy sigh. She walked to the bed and threw herself across it. With a deep moan, she grinned and closed her eyes, nestling into the blankets and breathed in the freshly made cloth. This was for her, all for her!She could get used to this.


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 “We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.”
~ 2 Corinthians 4:7Our hearts are fragile.
Fragile like glass.
Hearts of glass.

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"Shattered Lives" Chapter 11: The Wizard's Legacy book 1

Chapter 11A Traveler’s Dread            Paced steps flattened the forest’s grass as a dark figure glanced to the encamped travelers, staying behind the trees so no one would see. The figure looked up and around, eyes wide against the darkness. Where is the cursed bird? . . .Wings fluttered.Talons scratched bark.Frost hissed and overtook a limb.The figure turned as the snowy owl fluffed her feathers and settled onto a high tree branch. “I—” The figure swallowed. “Pain has a way of uniting. Potentially, at least.” The white bird said nothing as it stared down with her hollow, icy eyes. “Pain is what should be used. That is what I think.”“Wait,” the snowy owl whispered. “Lady Olivia shall be dealt with. In Wraith’s Hollow. Wraith’s Hollow. . .”“No, no, listen. Tell the master there is another way. We can—”“Dealt with in Wraith’s Hollow.”“We can use the pain of losing that dame to—”“Wait. Wait. Wait.”“Poisoned air! Listen!” The figure peeked at the encampment with a hush, hair standing on end. “Stones on bones . . . Did he not give you something else to say? Any new message?”“Wait,” the owl repeated. “Lady Olivia—”“Silence!” the figure hissed. “I have an idea! We must use the master’s backup plan! Must use that horrid Wilder woman! Lady Olivia’s demise will give us nothing! Now, listen. I have it all planned to the slightest detail. Once she is removed from the equation, the throne can more easily be taken. Trust me.”The snowy owl shut her beak and leaned forward. Her blue toes fidgeted with the tree’s branch as its frost crept deeper in, freezing more and killing the life. She closed her icy eyes as she took in every word of the scheme.–                 –                 –            It was noon, though the sun’s rays were pale as they passed through the tree branches, and the travelers stopped for a quick meal of bread and ale. A few sat on the ground or in their wagons, but most stood with their uneaten food held in clammy hands.The knights muttered among themselves and passed a canteen of water between them. A few squires attended to the horses, and servants talked in low voices, but all conversation was short-lived. Silence clung to all as they watched the still trees around them. None of the knights would let go of their weapons.            Olivia turned to Theron as they sat on the ground beside Sobriina and Aldret. She held out a piece of bread to him. “Want the rest?”            “You should eat it,” Theron said. “It’ll keep your strength up.”            “I’ve eaten enough. Here. Can you take it?”Theron’s eyes narrowed as he looked her up and down, but he took the bread.Olivia heaved a sigh and hung her head. “I know. . . It’s just bread and should not pose a problem.” She sighed as she brushed crumbs off her silky green frock. Theron’s brow softened as he gently rubbed her back. Olivia closed her eyes and leaned against him with the reassurance of his protection. Sobriina watched the two, but looked away when they touched.“We’re almost out of this vile place,” Theron whispered as he kissed the top of her head. “Almost there—”Sobriina took in a wheezed breath, her eyes wide and staring. All looked to her. Olivia froze. “Mistress?” she whispered.Theron grabbed his sword and stood, ready for action. “What do you see?” he hissed. Sobriina did not answer, her purple eyes bulging and her mouth open.Olivia’s throat dried as she stared. What was happening?Sobriina’s eyes rolled back, her hand over her mouth, and sneezed with a violent jerk. She groaned and wiped her nose. “I saw nothing,” the she-elf mumbled, her skin reddening her tanned gray-blue cheeks. “I apologize—”“A sneeze?” Theron snapped. “All that was, was a sneeze!” Servants who were nearby watched the group and held their tongues. Some looked to the trees and swallowed hard, but most fought against an amused smile.Olivia looked between Theron and Sobriina and a smile lifted her lips. She threw back her head and laughed. “A sneeze! It was only a sneeze!” Sobriina grinned, but her blush spread down her neck. Duke Aldret shook his head and called for more ale. Theron glared down at Olivia, his grip on his sword still firm. “Oh, come now!” the young lady gasped. “Laugh! It is much needed here!” Theron released his sword and ran his fingers through his hair. With a heaved sigh, Theron sat beside Olivia once again. “Wasn’t it funny?” she asked.“Yes. Yes, very funny. Quiet now.” He shook his head.“But why? We all need to loosen our shoulders, and allow a smile to come.”A groan gurgled beside them and they turned toward a guard who stood a pace away. His hands gripped his abdomen, his eyes wide. He lifted his head and looked at the four, his face dazedly confused. Blood dribbled from his opened lips and down his beard. An arrow jutted from his stomach.Olivia recoiled with a screech.Theron was on his feet in a flash. He wrenched his sword free and pulled Olivia behind him. “Ambush!” he cried. “Ambush! Everyone, to your posts!”Everything was dropped as weapons were drawn. An arrow whizzed through the air and struck a knight between the joints in his armor. His shriek chilled Olivia to the bone, and she pressed her hands over her ears.“Elshender!” Theron cried.The large man looked at his prince, his eyes wild and alive.“Protect the women if something happens to me!” Theron seized his shield from the wagon, though there was no time for his helmet. Another knight fell, coughing up blood, an arrow struck through his throat. A servant screamed, loud and shrill.The entire forest came alive.Men crashed from under each bush, morphed from shadows, and leapt from trees. They were dressed in earth tones and mud streaked their fierce faces. They screamed like wild cats and held their weapons firmly in front of them. Stocky men, in Flavencen armor made by dwarven hands, wielded maces tipped with jutting points. Swords were drawn and raised; most were short and a few were hooked like a fisherman’s line. Small axes were fisted in calloused hands as the men charged with wolf howls and a thirst for blood.            Not all were human. Sulpheros hurled themselves through the underbrush, their bodies lined with white scars and black-paint smeared with mud. Their sicky yellow, sun-bleached hair and sun-burnt rust skin made them look more animal and less elvish. A Black Dwarf raced alongside, his jet black beard, hair, and skin letting him be one with the shadows.Olivia froze with terror as the blood drained from her face. She paled like a ghost freshly raised from a warm corpse. A hand seized her arm. Panic overtook her and she jerked away with a cry. The hand tightened around her.“My lady! Stop!” She looked up and saw Theron, his gaze firm like stone. Krea and Cedany stood behind him, silent screams disfiguring their faces. “Come!” He turned to Sobriina to protect her as well, but stopped.The Lunaris had drawn her two anelaces, the short, double-edged swords gripped in her strong hands. She stood, her legs bent and body poised for action, and her purple eyes darted from one attacker to the other. “Do not dillydally and concern yourself with me, my prince!” Sobriina cried above the din. “My blades have tasted blood before!”Theron stared at her for a moment, never seeing a dignified woman face a horde of attackers.Sobriina’s eyes narrowed. “Go!”Theron lifted his chin and turned to the three ladies who cowered behind him. “Keep up,” he said to the ladies-in-waiting. He yanked Olivia to his side and wrapped an iron-firm arm around her middle. He ran to a horse as it stood with head raised and ears jerking this way and that. Its rider lay fallen in a pool of blood. Olivia clung to Theron, trying not to fall as he dragged her on. “He’ll get us! He’ll get us!” Krea’s scream clapped Olivia’s ears.To Olivia’s horror, a man leapt between them and their escape, his face painted like a barbarian and sword drawn back, ready for the plunge. Theron reacted with practiced speed and clarity. He released Olivia, shoving her behind him, and readied his blade for blood. “Elshender!” he cried over his shoulder before lunging at the attacker. The chaos spun about Olivia, disorienting and paralyzing. The three women clung together in a tight bundle, whimpering and pale. A hulky form raced toward them, one sword drawn. Olivia watched numbly as Elshender raced forward, lobbing the head of a Sulphuro as he came. She turned away from the surprised-looking head as it tumbled at her feet. Elshender seized Olivia and heaved her onto the horse, trying to keep it from running out from under her. “Get down,” he told Olivia, her eyes intent on Theron and his foe; they were battling further away with every parry and lunge. She sat hunched, her chest heaving and eyes bulging. An arrow whizzed by. “Down!” Elshender seized her head and forced her body against the horse. Olivia screamed and wrapped her arms around the horse’s neck, her eyes closed and teeth clenched in a stifled whimper.Krea shrieked something, but her words were lost in the chaos around them. Theron yelled and grabbed for Olivia, though she did not understand. What was going on? What was happening?The horse whinnied, high and loud.Olivia felt the animal topple. Her eyes flew open as the ground met her. She shrieked and struck the forest floor; her head bounced against the ground. The horse’s great weight came down on her leg. Olivia arched her back, her face distorted with pain and her hands clawing at the ground. Her stomach leapt into her throat as she gasped for air. The ground is so cold, she thought. So very hard. She wanted to think of nothing else.Above the cries of battle, a low rumble snarled close to Olivia. It was like the thunder of rage in the eyes of a vengeful man. She looked up, all hope of life shattered. She was left in the cold seclusion of terror.The head of a massive wolf stared down at her, its black lips pulled back and fangs dripping with blood and saliva. Its body rippled with firm muscle under its dark gray fur. Its eyes, though yellow, were filled with a human’s intelligence.Olivia recoiled, but could not look away from the werewolf. Its human build and wolf form straddled the fallen horse, and it eyed her hungrily as its claws sank into the horse’s sides. Blood bubbled around its black claws, and the horse shrieked and kicked.Fear strengthened Olivia and she ripped her leg from under the horse’s body. She crawled back as the werewolf reached forward, its clawed fingers curled. Olivia yelled and trembled on the ground, her hands pressed against her ears.The beast’s ear swiveled back and it recoiled with terrifying speed. Elshender’s swords hurled past its head, but missed, and sank deeply into the horse’s middle. Olivia gritted her teeth and tried to block out the horse’s final cry.“Under the wagon!” Elshender shouted to the trembling women. He wrenched his blade free and drew his second sword. He faced the wolf-man with fiery eyes.Olivia whimpered as a soft hand grabbed her. “My lady! Hurry!” Cedany cried as she helped Olivia to her feet. “Under the—”An arrow thudded into a tree beside them. The ladies screamed and clung to each other. Cedany pushed Olivia under the wagon and forced Krea, face streaming with tears, to follow. Olivia gripped Cedany’s arm, her eyes wide and her chest heaving. “Nan—” she gasped. “Where’s Nan?”“I don’t know, my—”“Nan!”“Quiet!” Cedany hissed. “Don’t you move!”Olivia moaned and fell silent. She thought of The Wizard. Where was He? He could strike the beastly foes with blindness, or order their limbs to detach and fall to the ground in lifeless heaps. We did nothing wrong! Olivia flinched as someone—she did not know if friend or foe—was thrown to the ground. A dagger jutted from his chest. Why must you allow this? But Theron will protect me. Where is he?Her bright green eyes darted throughout the fray, frantically searching for Theron. He had unknowingly forced his attacker into the heart of the fight, his zealous strikes fatally accurate as he sliced down one foe after another. Olivia stared in awe, a cold chilling her at the sight of his blood-splattered face and teeth bared like an animal’s snarl. She was grateful he was on her side—  A calloused hand snatched her ankles. All thoughts shattered. Olivia’s face turned deathly pale. With a sudden jerk, she was pulled backward. Cedany grabbed her arms as she screamed, but could not hold on. Krea did not move; her sobs rendered her useless. Olivia kicked and cried as she was dragged into the open, the road’s dirt and the spilled blood streaking her clothes.            “Theron!” Olivia shrieked as she dug her fingers into the hard ground. She heard Cedany shout something, but did not understand. Olivia screamed as a man grabbed her middle and jolted her upright. “Let go . . . of—me!” She kicked and struggled against her captor, but the man’s grip was unbreakable. “Elshender!”The large warrior looked her way, his face speckled in blood and sweat. He stepped toward her, but a clawed hand came down on his shoulder. He yelled and fell to the ground, his shoulder sliced open. The werewolf snarled with a grin, its fur bristling and yellow eyes piercing.            Olivia’s breath wheezed in and out as she thrashed in the stranger’s arms. He ignored her cries and hauled her toward the trees, away from the fight. Away from salvation. The man chuckled and his hold tightened. The tree shadows fell across them and the limbs crept in to hide the raging fight. Olivia’s wide eyes skimmed across the skirmish. She could no longer see Theron.“Theron!” She gasped to scream again, but the trees were all she could see. The din of battle faded and she was alone.Olivia cried and pulled against the man’s hold. It was no use; his hands were like iron. He laughed and threw her to the ground. Olivia blindly fell and rolled across the forest floor, hitting sticks and rocks as she went. When she came to a stop, she lay still and breathed heavily, her pale lips trembling and her throat raw. She glanced up at her attacker as blood seeped from her elbow and side.            He towered above her, his back straight and broad shoulders relaxed amid the hysteria. Their struggle had been effortless for him, for his chest heaved with steady, smooth breaths. His gray eyes delicately ran over her shaking form and flashed with amusement. The fire in his eyes dulled to the blaze of his red hair. He lifted his chin, fisting and unfisting his hands. His lips were pulled into a half-smirk, like a child giddy to play a game.            Stomping feet approached as a knight broke through the underbrush, sword raised and vindictive cry exploding from his gaping mouth. Olivia’s quivered breath calmed, for her assailant was not armed nor did he wear armor. She smiled darkly, plugging her ears against the man’s inevitably fatal cry. The darkly claded stranger turned irritably and made a fist. The hilt of a sword materialized in his firm grasp and an unendingly sharp blade sprouted to a harsh point. Fire engulfed the sword, hissing and licking along the blade like from an inferno. Olivia’s heart leapt into her throat. The attacking knight’s eyes widened as his battle cry faltered, realizing this was no ordinary man. His charge did not slacken as he rushed onward, facing the gray eyed stranger and his mystic sword. The knight’s sword slashed. The man stooped low and lunged. The knight’s cry halted, morphing to a gargled wheeze. The flaming sword jutted out his back and caught his cloak on fire. The gray eyed man stood, wrenching his blade free, and dismissively turned from the dying knight.              He stepped toward Olivia with relaxed confidence, the sword’s fire cashing half his face in shadows. A cry caught in her throat. “Theron. . .” she whimpered. The man stooped and released his flickering sword. The weapon fell and, before hitting the ground, faded to nothingness. His hands reaching for her, fingers curled like claws. Olivia screamed and crawled back along the ground. He was on her in a moment. Olivia thrashed as he held her down. Tears welled in her eyes and blurred her vision. “No! No, please!” she panted. “You can’t! Please!”            “Ah . . . What’s wrong?” the man cooed as he stroked her cheek. Olivia flinched away from his caressing fingers. “Everything’s prepared for you to be with me. Was given a good idea the other night. So good I decided to follow it.”            “Theron!”            “Shhh. . .” the man cooed and touched her lips. “No more of this. You’re mine. All mine, Lady Olivia.”Olivia stiffened, and her eyes turned up to the man. Her hair stood on end as every nerve felt stripped and raw against his touch. His gray eyes burned into her, and her heart skipped a beat. The man’s grin broadened. Olivia’s mouth opened in silent pleas, and tears streamed down her cheeks.


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 “We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.”
~ 2 Corinthians 4:7Hearts like fragile clay jars.Fragile like glass.

Hearts of glass.


If you have any comments, critiques, or concerns, please comment below!!!

"Shattered Lives" Chapter 10: The Wizard's Legacy book 1

Chapter 10Tiptoeing Love            Night fell and the wood finally awoke. Ravens and owls fluttered in the high limbs and called to one another. Their cackled cries alarmed the horses and caused them to stomp and neigh. The wind stirred and moaned between the trunks, so the branches contorted further. As the sun set, the orange sky cast a pale red through the trees and onto the travelers. The shadows jolted this way and that as the wind and ruby light gave them life.            The caravan creaked to a stop at Sir Elshender’s command as Olivia looked back down Savior’s Way. The forest’s lone road curved around a bend amid the trees and faded into nothing. She looked around and wanted to know how far they had traveled into the wood. As she turned from one tree to another, she realized they looked identical to the trees they had passed hours ago. Olivia’s brows knotted together and she bit back a whimper. She did not know where she was, or how far they had left to go. She was lost and would die if she were separated from the group. She would be—            Sobriina laid a hand on her shoulder. “Be at peace, my lady,” she whispered. “You shan’t overanalyze this bewitched place. Peace is what combats chaos; therefore, peace is what we need.”            Olivia shook her head as she continued to stare at the trees. “But I have no peace. Where does one find it?”            “The Wizard, my lady.”            That answers nothing, Olivia thought, but bit her tongue.The members of the caravan were unhappy about stopping and setting up camp, for each longed to reach Henricien as soon as possible. Though, it was night and they needed their rest. Everyone was sore, and rubbed aching limbs as they talked in hushed whispers. Servants and the knights’ squires unloaded tents and bedding as Olivia’s ladies-in-waiting prepared the meal. Because there was no traffic on the road that evening, the camp was set up on Savior’s Way. They crammed in a line along the road and wove in and around one another. No one dared step under the trees, for none knew what lay in hiding.Elshender circled his men around the site and told them to keep their eyes peeled and weapons ready. Blankets, thick cloaks, and robes covered each person as the small beams of light from the red sun melted away. The travelers’ breath puffed white from their lips as they stood together. A few fires were lit, but each was small and short-lived, for fear that those in the forest would notice, and no one could predict what a curious beast would do.Lady Olivia, Theron, Aldret, Sobriina, and Elshender sat together around a fire. A thick, coarse blanket covered Olivia as she sat on a grass-woven mat. She stared into the fire without a word. No one spoke, and the few servants’ conversations seemed loud in the silence. Nan, Krea, and Cedany rushed to and fro as they gave the men their meal of bread, cold meat, and ale.Krea bowed as she approached the seated five, and handed Olivia bread and cheese with warmed ale. The two women smiled as they met each other’s gaze, but their eyes were wide with wary fear. The others were served as each sat in stillness.Olivia turned her cheese over and over in her hands. She picked a piece of dirt from its pale side and forced herself to take a bite. She looked to Cedany, Krea, and Nan as they fed the men. She wanted to sit by them, to have Krea brush her hair as Nan told her stories of The One in Red.She watched Nan cut slices of cheese to give to the men, surprised by how quickly she had come to rely on Nan. The elderly woman had begun her service that early spring, but already a firm bond had been made. Olivia was pleased with the snowy-crowned woman, and grateful to come across a motherly servant. It was what she had always wanted: a mother.She watched as Nan slowed her work, her eyes downcast and knife frozen in her hand. Nan discreetly looked to those close by, not noticing Olivia. When satisfied, Nan let the knife fall from her hands. As she stooped to grab it, she picked up a small object as well. Olivia’s eyes narrowed curiously. It was a stone, gray and round. Olivia stopped eating and stared as Nan ran her fingers over the stone’s surface. She kissed it. Olivia’s eyes widened. After a moment, Nan slipped the stone into a pouch and continued slicing the cheese.Olivia blinked without a word. Never in her life had she seen anyone caress a stone, let alone kiss it. That was just not done. But she had heard some people did, those that lived in the deepest woods.“This is more of a peaceful wood than I thought,” Theron said, breaking the silence. No one answered.Olivia pulled her eyes away from Nan and turned to Theron, astonished that he would say such a thing. “I shan’t sleep tonight,” she whispered and poked at her bread. “Shan’t. I’m glad you feel the peace, but there is none here for me.”Theron glanced down at her as he stood, his fox fur cloak draped around his shoulders and his hand on the hilt of his sword. “Nothing will reach you. The Wizard’s here.” Olivia looked up at him. “He will protect us.”She turned away, but the fear did not leave her eyes.“And I will protect you.” Theron looked away as he spoke. He cleared his throat and shifted his weight.            Olivia half-grinned. “I know.”            The group ate the meager meal, and silently wished they could build a bonfire and feel its warmth and find comfort in its light. Something shifted among the trees. Olivia’s eyes bulged as every muscle froze. The others looked as well, each tense and alert. Theron’s grip of his sword tightened. Duke Aldret put down his ale. Sobriina’s purple eyes darted to and fro, and her mouth opened. “A Wraith,” she whispered.            “Wizard forbid!” Olivia hissed. A Wraith. Here! The shadow moved again. She leaned closer to Theron. A crow shot from the underbrush with a cry, a guard flinching as it flew past and a horse rearing up and stomping the ground. Those around the fire sighed as though sharing one breath, and turned back to their food. Theron grinned to himself and rubbed the back of his neck as he let go of his sword. Aldret glanced down at his ale and drank the rest of it in one huge gulp.            “A Wraith.” Olivia shook her head and shot Sobriina an icy look. The she-elf stiffened at the young lady’s glance. “What a cursed thing to say!”            “I meant nothing,” Sobriina said as she turned away. “And it wasn’t one; therefore, The Wizard should be thanked.”            Olivia shook her head, her eyes sharp. “But it could have been, stones on bones!”            “We would have recognized its ominous presence long before we saw it, my lady,” Duke Aldret said as he set down his cup and pulled his furred robe closer to himself. “The flames would churn as though in a tempest, and condensation would collect about our exhales.”            “Misty breath and wild fires.” Theron stared between the darkened trees. “Interesting combination.”Olivia turned from Aldret to her prince. “We would see it only if it wanted to be seen. I hear they are always invisible, those wretched monsters!” Her heart pounded in her ears like a drum. She shook her head and looked down at her barely touched food. She did not feel hungry, and had never liked warmed ale anyway. Krea should have known that!With a sigh, she pushed the food away and stood. “We should have brought a Seer.” Theron glanced at her. “They know how to deal with all that is not of the Red.”“Ah,” Sobriina said. “They know the art of spirits and future-telling, yet, by the Silver Eye, I say a sword to them is like a hoe in a fisherman’s hands. No, my lady, it is well we have knights at our side. A Seer can do many things, yet . . . protection against bloody dangers is not one of them.”“I bid you goodnight, then.” Olivia bowed to the prince and Duke Aldret. “I cannot sit in tension, so I’ll try to find peace in sleep.”“I’ll escort you,” Theron said as he stepped forward. Olivia took his outstretched arm and they nodded their farewells.            Theron walked Olivia to her tent, which she shared at the center of the camp with her ladies-in-waiting. Her bodyguard was stationed at the tent’s entrance, and he bowed low as the couple approached. The young lady glanced up to the intertwined branches, darkening the sparkle of the stars. A twig snapped. Olivia jumped and stepped closer to Theron.He looked down at her, seeing Olivia’s wide eyes darting here and there. He looked away and gritted his teeth. “You know, Lord Demus is a myth.”Olivia looked down.“There’s no such thing as a Spellbinder—”“That still doesn’t settle me much,” she whispered.They came to stop at her tent and Theron looked at the shadows cast over the ground. “I . . .” Olivia looked at him and Theron cleared his throat. “I just want you to be safe.”Olivia sighed and grabbed his hand. “Thank you.” Theron looked at her and a small grin lit her eyes. “For protecting me.”Theron glanced away, though she saw that he smiled. Olivia watched him as he breathed in and out, and the white frost of his breath curled around his lips. She leaned forward and kissed his cheek with a sudden peck, and stepped back.Theron’s eyes widened as he turned toward her.“Goodnight,” Olivia whispered, and she moved toward the tent.Theron grabbed her arm and drew her close against him. Olivia gasped, and he kissed her on the lips. She closed her eyes and kissed back. The bodyguard fought against a smile, and looked down as the betrothed couple took hold of one another.Olivia’s heart pounded and her skin warmed. She stepped back with a deep breath and laid a hand over her mouth. She looked to and fro to those around her, but they busied themselves with chores and none other than the bodyguard saw the kiss. Theron, his eyes alive and a grin filling his complexion, cupped her face with one hand. Olivia looked up at him; his eyes were so brown, like that Suvarian delicacy she’d tasted years ago. Chocolate, was it called?A distant wolf howled to the moon with a low, sad moan and everyone turned this way and that with rigid shoulders and darting eyes. Everyone save the pair. They did not hear the wolf, and did not fear the darkness for a brief moment.“Goodnight,” Theron whispered. A smile lifted Olivia’s rosy lips, and redness flushed her complexion. She glanced away, but did not pull from him as her grin broadened.Theron brushed her cheek and stepped away. Olivia almost held onto him, but stopped herself with a muffled laugh. “What?” he asked. She shook her head and let him go. She stared at him for the longest heartbeat, then turned on her heels and walked the few paces to her tent. She glanced back; he still watched her. She grinned.She passed Krea and Cedany before she entered the tent; the two women tried to busy their hands as they silently watched both of them. “Don’t say anything!” Olivia hissed as she passed through the tent’s entrance. The two ladies-in-waiting bowed low and tried not to giggle, their eyes shining bright with excitement.Once inside, Olivia’s smile grew until it filled her whole body. She laid a hand on her chest and laughed. She sighed and touched her moist lips with a shake of her head. Olivia rubbed her temples and her heart’s glassy surface cleared to a shine. Love tiptoed in.


___________________________________

Read the full book on Amazon. 
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Follow H.R. Rekow on your favorite sitesto know when the next chapter is available!Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, YouTube, Google+,Pinterest, LinkedIn, Goodreads,
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 “We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.”
~ 2 Corinthians 4:7Hearts like fragile clay jars.Fragile like glass.

Hearts of glass.


If you have any comments, critiques, or concerns, please comment below!!!

"Shattered Lives" Chapter 9:The Wizard's Legacy book 1

Chapter 9Legends of OldOlivia and Theron laughed as Sobriina ended her elvish fable of a foolish Sulphuro slave; even Duke Aldret smiled. Olivia shook her head as she glanced between the smiling faces around her. She took in a breath to tell a story of her own, but stopped. A lump formed in her throat and choked her. With a gag, she grabbed her throat and tried to breathe, coughing until air filled her once more. Her chest heaved as she sucked in more air, her eyes darting to and fro.Olivia looked down and noticed goose bumps dotted her arms. Her hair stood on end. A dark shadow enveloped the wagon. She blinked and realized everyone else had stopped laughing. She glanced at them, her head tilted to one side. The men sat, their shoulders rigid and hands on their weapons. Mistress Sobriina took a breath and closed her eyes. She let it out in one slow whoosh to calm her nerves. They all felt an eerie chill that not only caused them to shiver, but penetrated their souls and deep within.“What’s going—?” Olivia’s whisper faded into nothing as she looked out the window, her eyes wide. Her glass heart trembled. The final remains of the rolling green hills passed out of view and a thick woodland consumed her. The whisper of the wind and buzz of insects were cut short until cold silence remained. They had entered Wraith’s Hollow.Thick shadows of gnarled trees fell across the travelers. They tangled among one another until they were a new, living being. The trees’ limbs arched over the only road through the wood, Savior’s Way, and their branches wound together until the sky paled. The soft stomp of horses’ hooves and the creak of wagons’ wheels mingled with the chilled air. All was still, as though the forest was holding its breath.Olivia tried to swallow, but could not. She thought to clear her throat, but would not dare. She feared someone would hear, and turn their yellow glowing eyes upon her from the gloom. She clenched her hands together as she turned out the window. She had never seen such a thick forest! There was scarcely enough room for the trees to breathe, let alone feel the sun’s warmth. That was why everything felt dead, she considered. No warm light was allowed in, as though it were banned from the forest.Wizard, keep us safe, please! Olivia’s eyes leapt from shadow to shadow; something was watching her, she knew it. Let nothing come to harm us!“Who is Lord Demus supposed to be, exactly?” Sobriina whispered. Olivia flinched at her words; they were a scream in the unnatural stillness. Olivia’s brow furrowed as she opened her mouth to object to the question, but shut it and looked away. “I am poorly versed with Tulish mythology.”“Lord Demus. . .” Aldret’s whisper drained into silence as his pale eyes darted from tree to tree. “How is it you are uninformed of his character, being an experienced traveler through this tree line?”“I sought truth, my lord,” Sobriina retorted. “My father was near death; I had no time for children’s stories.”“He’s a Spellbinder in the old stories,” Theron said, his voice raw and quiet. “He practices dark arts known by dragons and Wraiths. I hear the power of Wraiths are so strong, it kills mortals who wield it from the inside out. Turns their eyes gray like death, too. It think its called Wraith Eyes.”“Dragons are also fables,” Sobriina pointed out. Theron shrugged indifferently. “And Wraiths’ power is what exactly? I heard whispered it was called The Pravus-”             Those in the wagon demanded silence with desperate hisses and waving hands. Olivia stared wide-eyed at the Lunaris, not knowing if the unspoken title of Wraiths’ might would summon the immortal phantoms from the gloom. Sobriina lay a hand over her mouth as she looked for one mortified face to another. “Mistress Sobriina les Desoreel,” Duke Aldret said with grave sincerity. “Never speak the name of Wraiths’ power. Spoken words carry authority, and such dark arts are best left abandoned in darkness for The Wizard to administer justice upon.” Sobriina nodded slowly and sealed her lips, giving apologetic glances between Theron and Olivia.“I will tell you now all that is recorded concerning Lord Demus’s nature,” Duke Aldret continued, “though much is based on ignorant superstitions. As the folklores state, he claimed Wraith’s Hollow as his own—”“—After the War of the Royals and the rebellion in Suvaria,” Theron interrupted.“And,” Duke Aldret continued, “subsequently, the forest has developed a troubled charisma.” Olivia shivered as she moved closer to Theron. She wondered if the blind elvish ghosts still wandered Deep Wilds in search of their gouged out eyes. She had never seen a ghost before.“Charisma?” Theron frowned as he stared at Duke Aldret. “Not the word I would use—”“My personal verdict; I should clarify,” the half-giant said and lifted his chin. “A beast’s mind is compelled to ominous environments. Such is our home, and, as you recollect, my prince, I am half beast.”Olivia eyed Duke Aldret, her knuckles white as they gripped her hands. He turned to look in her direction, and she glanced away before their eyes met.Duke Aldret continued, unconcerned with the wide-eyed looks of his companions, “After Lord Demus came, so did hags, Shadow Minstrels, Flesh Thieves, Charnelics, and a swarm of other abhorrent beings. The forest was proclaimed lethal and haunted a hundred and forty-seven years ago. Every resident immediately evacuated.”The three listeners sat with their eyes wide, their breath whispering in and out faster than before.“Therefore,” Duke Aldret continued, unhindered by his companions’ uneasiness, “Lord Demus rules Wraith’s Hollow and, as the accounts state, all the shady beasts conform to his authority. He raids whoever enters his forest and, it is said, none are left alive, except a select few. They are taken to his domain and are never seen again. Such is the old wives’ tale and vagabond nonsense.”Olivia quivered and looked outside, her eyes narrowed suspiciously when she found nothing but tree upon tree deep in silence. “To be true,” Duke Aldret said and glanced out his window, his voice hushed, “many have attempted to seek out and subdue the Spellbinder, but all their efforts end in vain. Either they are driven mad by starvation or the forest’s delusional effect, or they never discover a sign that the Spellbinder lives. It is very outlandish indeed—”“Why are we discussing this?” Olivia hissed. Duke Aldret glanced at the lady as she gritted her teeth and tried to stay calm.Theron took in a breath and laughed, his grin splitting through his wide-eyed stare. “Nice legend.” He rested against his seat and cleared his throat. Olivia shot him a hot look, but held her tongue. “I always have enjoyed stories like these. He must be really old then, Lord Demus? And to think, we’re trembling over a one-hundred-and-fifty-year-old, bent-over man.” The prince smiled and shook his head, yet he did not let go of his sword.Aldret stroked his chin. “In all probability, Lord Demus is not one man, but several who inherited the title from the one before them. No human could live such a long time.”“And I’ve heard he’s eight feet tall and his eyes blaze like fire.” Theron grinned. “He also drinks poison for every meal and sleeps on a bed of nails.” He shook his head again. “What about the tower? To the northwest, close to Trail Kin’s territories?”“That is believed to be truth, my prince,” Sobriina said.Theron humphed. “And is it your belief?”The she-elf’s brows rose. “I . . . it does not matter if it is true or false. ’Tis only a tower.”“Crazy children’s tales.”Olivia squirmed in her seat and took in a shaky breath. “Can we stop talking about him? Please.” She looked between the half-blood and prince, then turned away. “It troubles me.”Theron’s eyes shadowed irritably. “All right, but they’re only stories—”“I second the motion,” Sobriina said with a lift of her chin. “Such tales do not warm the soul when traveling through their origin’s shadow. The only danger is off Savior’s Way; let us not invite them onto the road with our words. I regret asking about the Spellbinder.”“Very well, my ladies.” Duke Aldret nodded and silently turned to face the window.Something touched Olivia’s arm, and she jumped with a shrilled squeak. Theron’s eyes widened as he withdrew his hand from her arm and stared at her. Red seeped into Olivia’s cheeks and she turned away.“Hey,” Theron said and grabbed her hand. “They are simply stories—”“There is always a grain of truth in every story.” Olivia’s eyes widened as she noticed the rough edge of her tone. She glanced at the prince and shrunk back. “I . . . I’m sorry. I didn’t—”“You’re frightened,” Theron whispered as she swallowed hard. He smiled, though his brow furrowed. “You are safe here. My men are the best.”Olivia looked away. She squeezed his hand and would not let go.



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 “We now have this light shining in our hearts, but we ourselves are like fragile clay jars containing this great treasure. This makes it clear that our great power is from God, not from ourselves.”
~ 2 Corinthians 4:7Hearts like fragile clay jars.Fragile like glass.
Hearts of glass.


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