Beckie Butcher's Blog: beckiesworld.com, page 8

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Published on August 24, 2023 16:39

JUST A LITTLE INFO…..

Salutations, everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful week.

Yesterday, I had my monthly lunch with my friend from church, and we were discussing CFS. I told her it was not just a day by day thing, but a moment by moment thing. Yes, it is a moment by moment thing. I explained how it is like a car running out of gas; that car cannot keep going, it stops immediately. I told her, when we go sour, we go sour fast, and plans have to be adjusted immediately. This means when we are out with our friends or at somebodys’ house, there is no, “just a few minutes, I need to help our hosts clean up,’ or, “well, I want to talk to so and so.” Many of us who suffer from this complex, misunderstood disease understand my description perfectly.

Based upon the above, I can tell you one thing; this is when you find out who your friends are and who they are not. People will tell you, “okay, I understand. We will leave when you have to go, that’s fine.” However, at least in my experience, many times, this has not been the case. People have said this to me, however, when it really happened, their, “ok, I understand….” has turned into, “well, you can wait a minute, I want to say something to so and so.” When I try to tell them how weak I am getting and how I feel like I’m going to pass out, I have gotten, “Oh, come on, it will just take a minute,” or,”stop faking it,” or, “I think you’re just exaggerating. Stop being such a baby!” What this all has told me is people understand what they want to understand for as long as they want to understand it. They understand so long as it is convenient for them to do so. They understand until they want to do something. Their, “understanding” doesn’t last; it’s not real.

You know, we have enough grief in our lives, we don’t need it from others. Sure, having plans sabotaged is a pain and an inconvenience; well, guess what? It is for us, too! We know it all too well. Do people really think it’s a walk in the park for us? Really? Come on! I have a medical background, and on my best day I couldn’t make this stuff up. Why would I? Think about that, it’s almost comical to think others would accuse us of such a thing. You know, our, “friends?” The people who say they, “love”us? Funny, it doesn’t sound like love to me. Not too long ago, my,”best” friend did that to me. She is no longer my, “best” friend. I have so many other friends who show me great kindness and understanding when they are with me. However, I no longer let people pick me up to go somewhere. That way, I can leave when I need to leave. If I’m not up to driving, then I don’t go. I have reached the point where not going at all is better than going and having to put up with, “friends” who only make it worse. It’s a part of CFS I have learned to accept.

So, to sum up, when we say we have to go NOW, we have to go NOW. Don’t just understand for as long as you want to understand and only when it’s convenient for YOU. That is not true friendship; it is phony. Do not accuse us of exaggerating or being a baby. We have enough of people doing that to us, we don’t need insult added to injury. We face enough harsh criticism and judgement from others, and some of them are our medical professionals. Shame on them. Remember, a car which is running out of gas cannot go another five or ten minutes and neither can we. It’s the same principal. If you’re going to be a good friend, be a real one, not a fair weather one.

Well, that is all for this week. Please, consider what I have said.

Until next time,
Beckie

#cfs #cfsisreal #cfsawareness #cfswarrior #beckiebutcher
#beckiesbattle #beckieoffershope #chronicfatiguesyndrome #wordprompts

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Published on August 17, 2023 15:13

Just a Few Thoughts….

Hello, my friends near and far!
I hope you have all had a wonderful week.
Well, here we are, almost in the middle of August. It seems like not too long ago, the days were getting longer and the robins were seeking out a place to nest. Opening day for baseball was eagerly anticipated and outdoor concerts were being enjoyed by many. And, at least for me, the CFS was better. Now, however, I can feel the air changing. Fall is on its way, and I am feeling anxious because I know all too well what it brings; severe pain, exhaustion and flare ups. Then, in just a few short months, winter comes, bringing bitter cold, causing my muscles to tense up, bringing even more intense pain.

Now, I can either panic and waste my time on energy on what’s coming or I can make the most of the weather we have right now. Yes, I will do that. I will take things one day at a time and enjoy these last few weeks of summer God has planned for us. A friend of mine once told me to live for today, because today really is a present. As for the months ahead, well, I’ll just psych myself up like I have since 2007. Every year, I dread the cold weather, and every year, I survive it, and I will again. The cold, hard days will pass, and baseball will return sooner than I think; so will robins and summer concerts.

Just enjoy today. We are exactly where God wants us, so make the most of it.

Take care, and I will, “see” you next week!
Hugs,
Beckie

#cfs #cfsisreal #cfsawareness #cfswarrior #beckiebutcher
#beckiesbattle #beckieoffershope #chronicfatiguesyndrome #wordprompts

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Published on August 10, 2023 17:54

Reflecting on CFS

Hello again, everybody! Boy, is it just me or did this past week go by awfully fast? It seems like I just wrote my last post. Speaking of time flying by, it doesn’t seem right in two months it will be October 2nd. That means unstable weather and the worst time of the year for CFS, at least for me.

Speaking of which, I was at my monthly Chiropractors’ appointment today and he asked me on behalf of someone else with CFS what the trick to living with it is. I was at a bit of a loss since I have been living with it for so long, so I told him I just got used to it. I adjusted to it day by day. All I can do is take it one day at a time and do the best I can. I do what I can do when I can do it, and when I need to rest, I rest and that’s all there is to it, I told him.

Looking at your life realistically, that’s all you can do. You don’t have control over your body anymore, but rather your body has control over you; hard to admit, yes, but it is the reality of CFS. You have to adjust to what your body will let you do and just roll with the punches, and there are punches. You have to find a way to adapt to it and fit into this new way of life. You don’t have a choice. Oh, sure, you can use the little bit of energy you have to be angry, but will it get you anywhere? No, it will just exhaust you, and for what? Why? It doesn’t get you anywhere. I have been there many times, and it’s never gotten me anywhere but physically and mentally miserable. On the other hand, like I have said many times, we are human beings, not saints, and anger is part of the human condition. It sounds contradictory, I know, and it is. However, life is full of contradictions. It’s easy to get caught up in that. It’s the evil one working, and he works so insidiously many of us don’t know what is happening. I don’t, anyway.

Somehow, though, we have to live our lives. So, we live it.

I don’t know if I have ever written about this before, but there is something known as the story of the spoons. It goes something like this; you are given twelve spoons of energy per day. If you get up, take a shower, make your breakfast, eat your breakfast, do your breakfast dishes, and put them away, you have already used six spoons. That is half of them. See where this is going? Somehow, you have to adjust your life to this. Somehow, you have to create a, “new normal,” based on this. Yes, this is a tall order.

To wrap up, CFS will not fit into our lives, so we have to find a way to fit in to CFS. You will do a lot better all the way around if you accept this as part of your life. You have to survive somehow, and you will. You are more creative than you realize, and you will find yourself doing what you have to do.

Well, that’s it for this week. God Bless you all, stay safe, and I will, “see” you next week!

Beckie

#cfs #cfsisreal #cfsawareness #cfswarrior #beckiebutcher
#beckiesbattle #beckieoffershope

#chronicfatiguesyndrome #wordprompts

Oh, one more thing. I sound like Columbo, don’t I, lol. I am going to be a Featured Author in Wordsmith Magazine! Here is a preview of it. Hope you like it.

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Published on August 02, 2023 22:01

Thoughts for July 27th, 2023

Hello, all! I hope you are all well. Whew! It’s a roasting 95 degrees as I sit here writing to you. I feel like a wet rag.

Anyway, enough of that.
I was watching something earlier today about a middle aged woman who had been diagnosed with cancer. She mentioned to the man in her life how she wanted her body back. It’s a feeling I know well. Many times in the past sixteen years I have said the same thing; I have been in tears over it. I have said it out loud many times to my Maker, and I have begged Him many times to heal me and make me the woman I once was.

As much as I have hated myself for being so angry, I realized it was a part of my grief, the grieving process of my life as I knew it. I was in mourning. In order to move on with my life, I had to mourn what once was before I could accept what was and will probably always would be. And, contrary to what some mean and cruel naysayers might say, it not only is healthy, but it is necessary. We cannot move on with our lives until we mourn any loss or aspect of our lives. It doesn’t have to be a death; it could be any loss in your life. Of course, some may say we are feeling, “sorry for ourselves,” or we just want, “sympathy,” and would be so cold and cruel as to tell us we need to , “suck it up,” and, “quit whining.” Amazingly enough, many of those who say such mean and nasty things are in the medical profession.

One thing I believe and I have mentioned to those who are so mean is it is not their illness. It is mine, and I will deal with it any way I choose to do so. It is none of their business, and it certainly is not for them to judge and/or criticize. Others need to respect each others’ needs and wishes and be supportive, not tear us down or belittle us for how we are handling it. Besides, you reap what you sow, so you’d better sow well. We’ll all suffer from something in some way as we grow older, and from what I have seen in my almost sixty years, the very ones who are cruel and judgemental to others are the once who suffer the most. They are also the ones who are just appalled at how others have treated them. They are the first ones to complain how mean and unsympathetic others are to their needs. Well, people, think back a few years. How were you to others? Did you show kindness and compassion to those who needed it the most, or were you just as cold, cruel, and judgemental as they are being to you now when you need it the most?

You know, it doesn’t matter what it is in your life. People need to be met where they are and for what they are going through themselves and not belittled or compared to others with other issues; that is not the point. Nor do they need to be told, “you’re not the only one, believe me.” Most people have the capacity to figure that out for themselves. It is arrogant, condescending, and insulting. Meet people where they are and show concern and understanding for their situations and what they are going through at the time. Think about these phrases; say them to yourselves and really listen to how they sound and whether or not you would like them said to you. Think about how they would make you feel. As somebody who has heard these kinds of comments many times over the years, they are quite disdainful. Remember, some day something is going to happen to you, and you are going to need compassion, too.

Well, that’s all for this week.
Have a beautiful week, and stay well!
Beckie

#cfs #cfsisreal #cfsawareness #cfswarrior #beckiebutcher
#beckiesbattle #beckieoffershope #chronicfatiguesyndrome #wordprompts

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Published on July 27, 2023 14:32

Dogs or cats?Cats! Definitely, cats! Just love mine.

Dogs or cats?

Cats! Definitely, cats! Just love mine.

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Published on July 20, 2023 15:28

Saying Hello!

Good day, everybody! I hope you have all had a safe and happy week.
I am continuing to enjoy the Chicago summer weather with good friends and fresh air.
Well, I continue to enjoy the honor and blessings of people reaching out to me concerning my book and my story. Earlier this week, I heard from a magazine who wants to feature me in their November issue. I spent the better part of the last two days filling out a fifteen question questionnaire; it was quite the experience, I must say! Talk about deep, intense questions! It took me through the tough times of my sixteen year journey all over again, which was not easy on me. But, you know, that’s ok. It made sure I never forgot and it humbled me. It reminded me I must never forget if I am to help others. I feel it was discipline from The Lord. My audience are not the only ones who need to learn from my experiences; I have something to learn as well. What that is, only He knows. And, I will figure it out one day when He thinks I am ready to know. It’s all up to Him.

So, here is some more good coming out of the bad. The world will discover more about CFS because a magazine asked me deep, intense, reflective questions which made me relive my darkest moments and wants to feature my book as well as myself. Awesome! I’m really happy about this, because it as been awhile since anybody has reached out to me wanting to share my story. Yes, this is hard; it takes everything I have and more to make it through the day some days, but it’s times like this which make it all worth it. And, when the day comes when I am no longer here, I know the legacy I will leave on this earth.

Well, that is it for now. Stay safe and have a happy, healthy week!
Love & Hugs,
Beckie.

#cfs #cfsisreal #cfsawareness #cfswarrior #beckiebutcher
#beckiesbattle #beckieoffershope #chronicfatiguesyndrome #wordprompts

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Published on July 20, 2023 14:23

Perspective

What do you think gets better with age?

Temperament and perspective. You learn what is important and what isn’t.

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Published on July 14, 2023 14:41

Sorry To Be Tardy….

Hello, my friends! I hope you have all had a wonderful week.
It’s been rather hot this week in Chicago, and the weather has been topsy turvy with tornadoes Wednesday evening. I spent about forty-five minutes in the basement with the cat yowling to get out of his carrier. But, luckily, there was just a little rain in my area. It could have been much worse, as there was extensive damage in my town of Elgin and surrounding areas.
But, here I am, safe and sound.
Having discussed the weather, of course, I have been having a hard time, which is in part while I am a day late. It has been one of those rare weeks when I looked upward in tears and said to my Maker, “Why? Why do I have to live like this? There is so much pain right now. What have I done?”

In my heart of hearts, I know I have done nothing. I also know God does not create bad things and hard times. My brothers and sisters in faith have told me I know how to turn it into something good through my writing. That’s why this is, they tell me. My purpose in this earthly life is to reach out through written words and inform and comfort people to let them know they do not suffer alone. I am read in many countries in many parts of the world, so, no matter how far away I am from you, you are not alone. I suffer right alone with you. I have many questions also. Unfortunately, some will never be answered on this side of Heaven. It’s frustrating, I know. I’ve been there many times; Perhaps some of you have also. After all, we’re only human, and we have human emotions. That’s ok. God understands our pain and feels bad for us. Then again, the human being in me says,”Then why don’t you heal us? Why do you allow so many people to suffer”? I guess it’s up to me to change my thinking about that. It really doesn’t do any good to go there. It just gets me angry. I’m a very critical thinker, and that’s my biggest roadblock with this disease as well as many other issues in life.

My father once told me, “Stop looking for things that aren’t there!” He actually would get rather angry. I can’t say I blame him. I probably drove him crazier than I drove myself. Although he could be harsh about such things, I think it was his way of showing love and concern for me. After all, he knew what it was doing to me, and he wanted me to stop. My mother put it another way. She told me to, “Stop thinking so much . You’re going to think yourself into trouble.” She was right, too. I do it to this day. I’m almost sixty years old and I never learn.

I had a conversation with a Minister earlier today. She called to check on me and she reminded me God is my constant companion. He never stops walking with us as we live our lives and work through our struggles, and CFS is definitely a struggle for those of us who live with it. Just getting through the day is a full time job.

Well, that’s all for this week. I know I said I was going to take some time off; I’m such a liar! I can never stay away from anything for very long.
Take care and have a wonderful week, everybody!
Beckie

#cfs #cfsisreal #cfsawareness #cfswarrior #beckiebutcher
#beckiesbattle #beckieoffershope #chronicfatiguesyndrome #wordprompts

#cfs #cfsisreal #cfsawareness #cfswarrior #beckiebutcher
#beckiesbattle #beckieoffershope #chronicfatiguesyndrome #wordprompts

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Published on July 14, 2023 12:20

Weekly Summer Check In….

Good day, all! I hope you are well and those of you in America who observed Independence Day had a safe one.

In spite of my suffering, I once again discovered how loved I am. Right out of the blue one evening, I heard somebody on my front porch. I peeked out of my front window and spied one of my dearest friends dropping off the cutest little wicker chair and a small table with a beautiful geranium on it. I was so grateful! I loved it! She mentioned since I loved my morning coffee so much, she thought I could enjoy my coffee on my porch sitting in the chair and looking at the beautiful flowers. Wow, just wow. What did I do to be so blessed with such a wonderful friend.

You see, it is the the little things in our lives we must remember, even on the worst of days. We must not let ourselves become so overwhelmed with the pain we forget all of this. This is God working in our lives, so please don’t let the evil one get a stronghold in your minds and in your bodies. Try your best to keep going, because there is goodness and kindness out there for you. I understand how hard it is to become overwhelmed with the bad, as it has happened to me many times in sixteen years. Somehow though, when God knows we need it, good things do happen. He sends us His blessings through other people in our lives. I know there are those who are not so nice and make our lives worse, but remember, that is not of God. That is the work of the evil one. Remember, God does not author anything bad.

Well, that’s all that’s on my little brain this week. Take care, and I will check in again next week.

Love and hugs to you all!
Beckie.