Heather Holleman's Blog, page 124

2 Free Downloads for You: The Verb List and the Community Building Questions

Today I’ve decided to give you my two most requested documents of all time. First, enjoy my personally curated list of the best questions to ask to allow a group to get to know one another. My favorite question is this: What question do you like people to ask you about yourself?

Second, enjoy this list of vivid, analytical verbs to immediately improve your essay writing. Feel free to share!

Community Building Questions Download



Vivid Analytical Verbs Download

A Little Reinventing

The Italian Mama tells me that it’s a time for reinventing yourself (again) when a child leaves for college. She told me this when I had both girls suddenly in elementary school, when I had girls in middle school, when they left for high school, and now when I have one in college. You just keep inventing yourself, she says. Again. And you’ll do it again with each new stage of life.

Again!

It’s a hopeful feeling. It’s a strange kind of expansive hope. You begin to see possibilities for your children and for yourself. I’ve had to reinvent myself during COVID-19, and I know what this feels like and what could happen. It’s like that day I thought I might try gardening, just a little bit, and see how it feels to put on that identity. I kept giving myself permission to try this or that new thing, and before I knew it, I was knee-deep in weeds, then mulch, then ripe tomatoes. And then today, I’m elbow deep in Roma tomatoes, Serrano peppers, onion, limes, and cilantro as I make fresh salsa. So the new me? I’m a gardener, a harvester.

I’m also an organizer. I spent some time organizing all the yarn and crochet supplies from the daughter who left. She gave me the go ahead to “freshen up the bedroom” with some new bedding and freshly painted dressers and bookshelves. Perhaps I’m now one of those people who paints furniture. This I do with my youngest daughter who enjoys this kind of thing.

So, in this time of reinventing, you take the empty space and you ask what the new possibilities are.

If You’ve Been Comforted

How thankful I am today for all the parents who have traveled on ahead of me who knew exactly what to say and exactly how to comfort Ashley and me as we left our daughter at college!

Just when I would become overwhelmed with sadness, I’d receive a text from a mom who reminded me how it would feel like leaving a part of my heart somewhere else and how normal it was to feel certain ways. Or I’d receive a message from other parents reminding me what the car ride home would feel like and how to feel better. Then, a call would come from still another older parent to tell me how it was normal to feel so sad to see her empty bed or her missing seat at the dinner table. This morning, I received another message from a mom allowing me to ask any question I wanted about what it was like to live this new life without your daughter at home. They all remind me that it does feel better one day. You don’t keep crying every day of your life. Life is beautiful and rich and purposeful and good–even though right now is a strange transition to a strange new season of life.

I thought of 2 Corinthians 1:3-5 when I felt such comfort from others. Paul writes, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.  For just as we share abundantly in the sufferings of Christ, so also our comfort abounds through Christ.”

This experience reminds me of the vital role older people play in the lives of the younger. I think of the time in my life when God has most comforted me and how, and then I think of how to pass on the wisdom to others.

So thank you to all who have been comforted who now comfort me.

When the Fear of the Thing is Worse Than the Thing

I think it’s true of most things: our fear of something is often worse than the thing we’re fearing. I’ve heard it said that sometimes when your worst fear comes upon you, you find that you move through it. You survive it. God’s grace abounds. At least in the case of dropping a daughter off to college, the fear of it had me crying all week long. But when the day came, it was easier than I thought. I moved through the day with joy and assurance. I survived it. God’s grace carried me. And it will carry her.

Prayers for a College Student: Flourishing, Favor, Shalom, and Excellence

Tomorrow I drop my oldest daughter off at the University of Pittsburgh where she’ll be a student in the Honors College to study microbiology! This morning, I spent time journaling and thinking through how I could best pray for her and her new suite-mates. If you also have a college freshman, enjoy these prayers!

First, I pray for flourishing. I pray that my daughter truly thrives. I love the verb flourish in scripture. You can see such beautiful promises through that verb that I pray all morning for Sarah. Consider Psalm 52:8 and David’s confidence about his life. He writes, “But I am like an olive tree flourishing in the house of God; I trust in God’s unfailing love for ever and ever.” Think about Psalm 92 and the promise that the righteous will flourish. Finally, I pray the blessing from Psalm 115: “May the Lord cause you to flourish, both you and your children.” Lord, will you cause our college students to truly flourish in every way–spiritually, academically, socially, emotionally, and even financially.

Next, I pray for belonging, true friendship, and favor with others. I pray for the fellowship the Holy Spirit allows us to have with others. I pray in line with 1 John 1:7: “But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.” I also pray that my daughter finds favor with others. Throughout scripture, we can see the Lord’s kindness as He allows people to find favor in the eyes of others (Genesis 39; Exodus 11; Nehemiah 1; Esther 2; Psalm 84; Psalm 90; Proverbs 3; Daniel 1). I conclude by praying from Psalm 5:2: “Surely, O Lord, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield.” Lord, will you allow our college students to find true belonging with You and then with others, true friendship, and favor with others.

Next, I pray for shalom–the sense of well-being, completeness, wholeness, and peace–to fill my daughter’s heart. I want her to feel that “all is as it should be” wherever she goes and that her environment feels right. I pray against homesickness. I pray the blessing over her that the Lord would “turn his face towards [her] and give her peace (shalom)” from Numbers 6:26. Lord, give our college students Your peace that passes understanding.

Lastly, I pray that she would become excellent in the work of her hands. I love Proverbs 22:29: “Do you see a man skilled in his work? He will serve before kings; he will not serve before obscure men.” I pray she would study “with all [her] heart as if working for the Lord” (Colossians 3). I pray from Ecclesiastes that Sarah would be happy in her work as a gift from God. I love how Solomon states that this person will “seldom reflect on the days of his life, because God keeps him occupied with gladness of heart” (Ecclesiastes 5:20). I pray from Psalm 90 this incredible prayer: “May the favor of the Lord our God rest upon us; establish the work of our hands— yes, establish the work of our hands.” Lord, enable our college students to become excellent in their work.

I’ll remember these words for Sarah as I pack up the car: Flourishing, Favor, Shalom, and Excellence.

5 New Growth Goals for Writers

I recently agreed to host a seminar on The Art of Writing to help Christian writers improve their craft. I found myself so excited I could hardly contain the joy! I do love helping writers grow!

Since it’s the beginning of a new academic year, it’s a great time to consider how you also might grow as a writer and improve your craft.

But where should you begin? Enjoy these possible growth directions:

Experiment with finding your authentic written voice by exploring the psychology of punctuation (how grammar impacts the reader’s experience of your words), varying your sentence lengths (try the 3-5 word sentence!), using precise, vivid verbs (of course!), and thinking more about how you want your readers to relate to you (professionally, as a peer, as an expert, as a fellow explorer, etc.). This year, I’m working on revising Seated with Christ for a preteen audience. I’ll need to transform my written voice from academic to relatable! Resource: How to Write with Flair: 5 Ways to Immediately Improve Your Writing.

Design your ideal writing life as a way to worship. What if this year you gave yourself permission to write as a calling from the Lord and as a way you worship Him best? What if you moved your mindset from thinking of writing as a luxury or guilty pleasure to a profession? When I coach various writers, they often confess they don’t feel like it’s right to indulge in writing because it feels like it’s not as important as other tasks. They also feel like it’s wrong to prioritize writing since it’s a hobby and not legitimate work. What if you did make writing your legitimate work?

Spend a week discovering what to write (Why This? Why Now? Why Me?). Ask yourself what message you want to deliver to the world and why. Ask yourself why now is the best time in your life to write this message. Then, remind yourself why you are uniquely positioned to tell this message because of your experience and expertise. Resource: Writing to Change the World: An Inspiring Guide to Transforming the World with Words by Mary Pipher.

Study how to tell a great story by managing tension and pace. What if you practiced withholding key information, setting up unanswered questions or unresolved problems to engage a reader better? What if you practiced dialogue, action scenes (fast paced) and then interludes / reflection paragraphs (medium / slow paced) to carry the reader along? I’m the worst at this! This is why my six novels never sold. Yes, I’ve written six novels that lack tension. I’m working on this!

Consider the art of the micromessage and how to write with social media in mind. What if this year you practiced writing less, writing memorably, and writing with social media in mind? What sentences would someone tweet or share? Think about strategically using repetition, chiasmus, rhyme, or powerful questions to form small, sharable messages otherwise know as the MicroMessage. Resource: Microstyle: The Art of Writing Little by Christopher Johnson, PhD.

5 growth goals for writers: develop your authentic written voice, design your writing life, discover your message, manage pace and tension, and write with social media in mind.
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Enjoy your writing journey this new academic year!

Taking In What’s Provided

Today I realized how much exists right around me for true nourishment. It’s just not conventional nourishment. It’s not what I’m used to or what I think I even need. But I’m learning to receive from the Lord’s hand whatever He choses to offer me. This applies to everything from books to conversations, from the Bible to various activities allowed in a COVID-19 world. Sure, everything looks different in our lives, and nobody knows what the fall semester will look like, but we sit here and receive what comes each new day.

The garden has become so symbolic of this daily provision. Instead of a large meal of processed foods, I’ve learned to gather a handful of ground cherries. I’ve learned to steam a bowl of green beans. We’ve all learned to spread the pesto on pita and bake it with the oven-dried tomatoes. We eat the ripe cucumbers with hummus.

It’s a different way of living, but it’s what’s always been true of living with flair. It’s a way of saying, “This is what’s here. This is what’s offered.” And we receive it. We make meaning from it. And we delight in it.

The Remedy Nearby

This morning I remembered the astonishing and beautiful claim that when you encounter some poisonous plant in nature, the antidote is often nearby. It’s such a wonderful phenomenon: poison ivy will often grow near its remedy, jewel weed; stinging nettle will grow near the horsetail plant that relieves the stinging and itching; and there’s even a poisonous tree, the black-sap poisonwood in Central America, that grows alongside the gumbo-limbo tree that cures the rash from the poisonwood.

This lesson in nature reminds me to stop, look around, and understand in new ways how the environment God put me in provides the resources and mechanisms I need for growth and healing. It’s all right here. There’s often a solution nearby that God designed at the moment of my need. I love how the very environment we feel has somehow poisoned us also provides the remedy right there alongside what’s troubling us.

I remember this with joy when I research how to best rid my Brussels sprouts of the infestation of tiny caterpillars–also known as army worms or cabbage loopers– who love to munch my glorious plants. I wanted to use a natural and homemade remedy. Was there something nearby? Guess what? My very abundance of nearby Serrano peppers, when blended with water and garlic, will supposedly repel all pests when sprayed on the Brussels sprouts leaves in the evening. I cannot wait to try the concoction.

As pick a few peppers, I remember the principle of the remedy nearby.

Concerning Tomatoes

With so many tomatoes, I’ve developed the daily tomato sandwich ritual. It’s a great way to use your tomatoes, dill, and lettuce. Our favorite sandwich involves a hearty toasted, grainy bread, sliced tomatoes, red onion, fresh dill, and crisp lettuce. You can use a vegan mayo (it’s good!) or regular. Make sure you add lots of salt and pepper to your sandwich. Delicious!

I also love making oven-dried tomatoes with all my Roma tomatoes. Once you’ve collected enough from your garden (or, if you’re like me, your neighbors offer gifts of surplus tomatoes), simply slice, remove the seeds, and add salt. Place on a baking sheet at 250 degrees for several hours. Check each hour to see how dried they are. Then, you can store them in the fridge, freeze them, or eat them right away with a little olive oil and fresh basil. All winter, I’ll use use the stored dried tomatoes in sauces, in sandwiches (see above!), and on our pizzas.

Cleaning the Bird Bath

If you’ve never seen a plump robin rollicking in your bird bath, you’ve missed out on a fun garden moment. They relish the cool water; they splash about; they turn circles.

This bird bath has brought joy to the garden. When the sun rises, the solar-powered fountain starts and pours water down into the bowl. It’s a delightful tinkling sound.

I just returned from cleaning the bird bath and filling it with fresh, cool water. The birds come immediately to bathe and refresh themselves. I need to straighten the one bowl when I’m finished writing this.

Living with flair has always meant finding the delightful things in our environment. And it means finding ways to bless both people and nature’s creatures around us.