Hart Johnson's Blog, page 19

J is for Justice

Jonquils

Jowly Janna jinxed Joe to jerry-rig Jersey. Janna envisioned jewels and jonquils in June if elected justice. Sadly, Joe was a juggler. He juggled jars of jello and though they looked jewelish, they were only jiggly. Janna's jinx gave Joe jitters and he dropped the jello; it jumped jovially onto everyone from junkies to judges. Jill loved Joe and judged Janna's jinx unjust. Jackals and jaguars were more judicious. Jill jammed Janna's jukebox with juxtaposed Journey and jazz jacked the volume. Janna uncontrollably danced a jig, earning jeers from jaundiced jokesters. Janna failed to be elected justice. Which was justice.

I is for Inept

Looks a bit shifty, eh?

Ike the iridescent iguana imagined himself an intellectual, but Ike was rather an idiot. Ike invented icky ice cream flavors: iceberg, imitation krab, inchworm and io moth. Ike ignored irksome ivy and now he is itchy. Ike isolated an irritating ibis named Iris. Iris imitates intelligence with idiom and shares illicit images of inspectors. Ike and Iris went to Idaho as illegal immigrants and industrious independents identified them as inept. Ineptitude in Idaho qualifies one for politics. Inquiries into intrigue implode. Insanity increases incumbency! Irresponsibility is irrelevant! Ike and Iris inspire! Elections include these idiots and Idahoans implore, “ELECT!”



[A drabble is a story in exactly 100 words.]

[As an Idahoan, originally, I get a pass at mocking it.]

[It's true they have rather indiscriminate election patterns]

[But illegal immigrants... especially of the non-white male sort, and alternate species qualify here... have very poor chances, no matter what the Napoleon Dynamite/Pedro propaganda might hint at].

H is for Hush

The hush halted Henry. He’d heard hammering for hours. Hannah had hummed to hide the hideous harangue.





The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch

“How come his high holiness hid the holy hand grenade here?” Hannah asked.



“Howard the horrid hates him and threatened to hit his house with it.”



“Hasn’t Hamish halted Howard’s efforts?”



“Hamish’s health hasn’t held. He has hepatitis.”



“How horrible! Hamish is honest and honorable. I hope he heals.”



Heavy heels hit hard wood. Hannah and Henry hid. It was Howard. Henry heaved a horseshoe at his head. Howard toppled hard. Hannah held him while Henry howled.



His holiness came running, happy. “Hallelujah!”



[A drabble is a story in exactly 100 words]

G is for Gymnastic Giraffe

Gordon the goat grumbled grouchily. Grass gave him gout unless it grew newly green and gray skies made him gloomy. Gilbert the geko was much gayer, groovy and given to goofiness. Green and gray though he was, he golfed with a great gang of grasshoppers and gambled with gargantuan gorillas. And then Gia the giraffe arrived gyrating with geriatric gymnasts. Gordon gawked. Gilbert giggled. He gave guided tours of their grand garage. They grazed on green grapes and gulped grapefruit juice, though Gia suggested they add gin. Gaiety grew. Gordon finally guffawed, giving a go to the gasping good times.



[A drabble is a story in exactly 100 words]



[G adds an extra challenge. Not only are there fewer words than many letters, the letter has two (or more) sounds. I tried to keep them segregated to maximize the alliterative effect but it still loses something]

F is for Flatulence (yes, I went there)

Fabulous flamencos

Felix fancied Frannie. Frannie's face featured freckles, fringed with fair feathery hair. Felix was Frannie's friend, far from feeling amorous, it felt familial. And Frannie felt Felix was fickle and fairly false. In a feat to impress Frannie, Felix fenced a phantom. Finally she laughed, but then he farted. Fortunately for Felix (he thought), Fiona came in and Felix framed Fiona for the flatulence. Fiona flushed. Frannie was not fooled. In fact Frannie was furious. “False friend!” Frannie took Fiona's hand and led her to a festival with frolicking, feasting and Flamenco dancing. Felix frowned, forsaken, then was forgiven.



[A drabble is a story in exactly 100 words]





In other news, Everybody wants to be an F word.



Philosophy, phoenix, even phonics. Pretty much any word with a PH (silly Greeks). But it does not stop there. There is cough, laugh and rough.

E is for Elephants

Elephants being elegant

Eli's editing career ended early. Ego exhausted him. Empty-headed authors earned enough accolades for their ersatz elegance. He'd had enough. But no epiphanies came to envelop him in a new direction. Empty eating only energized his angst. Evening echoed with exasperation. And then Emma entered. Emma's exuded empathy and empathy enhances everyone's aura. Emma encouraged Eli to examine every option. Engineering was out as Eli's education excluded arithmatic. Electrician training ensued, but then electrocuted him, ending those aspirations. Environmental work was promising but economic considerations exed the option. He wanted excitement! Enchantment! Emma encouraged his imagination.

Ergo, entertaining with elephants.



[A drabble is a story told in exactly 100 words]



For a joyous elephant dance, watch this...



And because I'm me and a bit twisted...

D is for Digression and Dragon of the Stars

Darling baby dingos

Darling dimpled Dorene denounced Dan for his dour disposition. She said, “Daily digressions develop delusional dexterity. Dreamy dalliance defends us from depression. Digress daily dear one! Derive joy from deviance and depose life's dullness.”



Dan doubted her dialog, dreading death or even detention. “I don't dare deviate from duty.”



Dorene derided, “Dreaming of dappled dragons doesn't deserve detention, nor does dancing in daffodils. Dieting. Now THAT'S death! Duty without diversion drains dear life from you.”



A dandy dingo entered, dragging daisies. A dozen dainty door mice darted about. Dorene poured a daquiri. “You see. Divine digression.”



[A Drabble is a story in exactly 100 words]







Dragon of the Stars: A Review in brief



Alex Cavanaugh's latest book, Dragon of the Stars, comes out Tuesday and I was fortunate enough to receive an advanced copy to prepare to ask Alex a few questions (Q day: April 20), but I thought before that, I could give a brief review... Dragon starting with D and all, it is today.



Blurb: The ship of legends...



The future is set for Lt. Commander Aden Pendar, son of a Hyrathian Duke. Poised to secure his own command and marriage to the queen’s daughter, he’ll stop at nothing to achieve his goals.



But when the Alliance denies Hyrath’s claim on the planet of Kavil and declares war on their world, Aden finds his plans in disarray. Entrenched in battle and told he won’t make captain, Aden’s world begins to collapse. How will he salvage his career and future during Hyrath’s darkest hour?



One chance remains–the Dragon. Lost many years prior, the legendary ship’s unique weapon is Hyrath’s only hope. Can Aden find the Dragon, save his people, and prove he’s capable of commanding his own ship?



Review: I enjoyed this space jaunt. The characters were well thought out with complete arcs and Pendar had some very tough choices to make. I particularly loved Tamlin—his weapons leftenent (though I may have that title wrong)--she is his hard working and talented wingman with a gift for sincerity that makes her both a bit awkward and very endearing. I liked the moral dilemma at the core of this story and the character growth shown by Pendar, who is initially so focused on his career that he fails to quite comprehend that there are people around him with worries and lives. It isn't normally my genre, but there was plenty of character stuff to keep me happy.

C is for Cacophony

The chorus of crows across from my house

[For those of you who have read A and B... sorry for the lack of alliteration here--this was written in a more "to write well" spirit and I think it catches a mood.  I have shared this elsewhere, but it is a drabble and appropriate for the day]



I hear the faint hum and then see the leaf-bare trees against the strawberry sky. The hum becomes a buzz and I recognize it, though it would be indistinct to an untrained ear. As I turn the corner, houses momentarily block the trees from view but the sound grows more clear. Individual cries. Caw. Caw. A stray pair of birds veer as far as the street I am walking on and I am confirmed, but by now I have passed the houses and can see the branches well enough to recognize the congregation. A cacophony of noise welcomes me home.



[A drabble is a story in exactly 100 words]



[Cacophony also happens to be my very favorite word]



[Heavy alliteration will return tomorrow]

B is for Balance

Pardon the swearing. The sentiment fit.

Boistrous bullies bragged belligerently about beating up on Little Ben Brown, but Ben bravely bellowed. Bugs and bees buzzed. Birds brandished beaks. Beasts bounded, and suddenly Ben had backup. A bear bounced a ball, baring big teeth. A boar brayed, “Baratheon!” A baboon belted boulders. And an itty bitty bunny rabbit nibbled at a bloody pile of bones. The Bully boys backed away bowing because beastly brethren balance brutality.



[A Drabble is a story told in exactly 100 words]



Beast of Caer Bannog Video if you care to watch.

A is for Antics

Airborn armadillo

Advancing amusement is awesome, but sometimes it requires a plan. For mischief, shenanigans, artful avoidance of order... When we are strategizing for silliness, what we need is antics. Add an armadillo to the art show. Aim a squishy arrow into the angry audience. Allow auditory interpretation after hours at the orchestra. Anthropomorphize an arbor. Suggest an aardvark as administrator. Audition ants for a teeny tiny play. Answer anyone's phone conversations. Accept an advance with an amorous animal noise. But never never ever argue with an attorney or an anarchist. There are antics and there is insanity.





And for the Insecure portion of this post...



(As part of Insecure Writer's Support Group)



Also Appearing



I wrote a book by this title a little over a year ago. It is about a teenage girl who feels like a bit player in her own life. Adult me is feeling like this right now and I can't seem to shake it. I have a few good friends getting HUGE opportunities--giant book deals. And I just can't even see the path. I thought I knew the steps, but the path seems to have flooded.  I will get back to it, but at the moment I feel very much like I am slipping and sliding with no ability to see the next place to put my foot...



If you'd like to join A to Z fun, or visit the others participating, the full list is here.

And if you'd like the list of Insecure Writers or to join us in the future, go here.