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John Martin

Goodreads Author


Born
in Launceston, Australia
Website

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Influences
Colin Bateman, Carl Hiassen, Tom Sharpe, Joseph Heller, John Mortimer, ...more

Member Since
November 2011

URL


I'm an Australian who writes funny novels with a dash of mystery and sometimes with a dollop of whodunnit. Heck, 2020 even brought out some black comedy from me.

For an insight into my quirky imagination, get the first novel in my Windy Mountain series, Lie of the Tiger, FREE from your favourite eBook retailer.

If the old men are going to save the ailing Tasmanian Tiger Museum, they have no choice but to break The Mayor’s silly law banning common dogs.
...more

John Martin is currently not accepting new questions.

Popular Answered Questions

John Martin I don't believe in it. I think this is because I spent all my working life as a journalist on newspapers -- and meeting deadlines was a matter of nece…moreI don't believe in it. I think this is because I spent all my working life as a journalist on newspapers -- and meeting deadlines was a matter of necessity if you want to get paid. When you are writing fiction, sure there are days ideas don't flow. But there's always stuff to do. Work on a profile of a character. Do some research that's related to what you're doing. Proof-read/rework stuff you've already written. Write a scene from a chapter way ahead, and work out where it fits in later.(less)
John Martin I guess it's the same thing as completing a painting or building a nice piece of furniture. Satisfaction. A sense of achievement, knowing you've put l…moreI guess it's the same thing as completing a painting or building a nice piece of furniture. Satisfaction. A sense of achievement, knowing you've put long hours and all the knowledge and imagination you can muster into those 70,000, 80,000 or 90,000 words. I can't paint for nuts, I can't nail two pieces of wood together - but I can do this. If people enjoy it, that's a bonus.(less)
Average rating: 3.51 · 220 ratings · 85 reviews · 22 distinct worksSimilar authors
Who Knew Tasmanian Tigers E...

3.03 avg rating — 60 ratings4 editions
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Lie of the Tiger

3.75 avg rating — 55 ratings5 editions
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True Wit: Stories by Humor ...

by
3.17 avg rating — 18 ratings — published 2019
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Major BS: A Top Secret Mission

3.50 avg rating — 16 ratings — published 2009 — 3 editions
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The Wrong Magician

3.44 avg rating — 9 ratings2 editions
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Blokes on a Plane

3.70 avg rating — 10 ratings3 editions
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Major B.S.

3.36 avg rating — 11 ratings5 editions
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Accidental Illegal Immigrants

3.80 avg rating — 5 ratings2 editions
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Romeo and Julie

3.60 avg rating — 5 ratings
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Whitey and the Six Dwarfs

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Thirty years of laughs in one compilation

My compilation of the first three funny mystery novels in the Windy Mountain Tasmanian Tiger series Different Stripes by John Martin is out.
Different Stripes is available at Amazon, Apple, Barnes and Noble, and Kobo.

It contains three novels.
Who Knew Tasmanian Tigers Eat Apples! by John Martin Lie of the Tiger by John Martin Blokes on a Plane by John Martin

The books cover nearly thirty years of laughs and mystery.

Buy here Read more of this blog post »
4 likes ·   •  2 comments  •  flag
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Published on May 26, 2018 18:15
Who Knew Tasmanian Tigers E... Lie of the Tiger Blokes on a Plane Whitey and the Six Dwarfs
(4 books)
by
3.42 avg rating — 130 ratings

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How Much Is That Scorpion in the Window (Humor)
1 chapters   —   updated May 13, 2015 06:32PM
Description: When I was a boy, pet shops provided simple pets for simple needs in simple times. But times have changed. "I was in the pet shop the other day and was truly startled with what they had to sell," I write in this collection of stories both small and tall. The book is out of print. I still have a couple on my bookshelf.
Apples (Humor)
1 chapters   —   updated May 13, 2015 06:32PM
Description: A satire based in Windy Mountain in Tasmania in the early 1990s when the question was oft asked about the Tasmanian Tiger: is it extinct or not? Former town drunk Bert Whish-Willson swears he saw one in a bus shelter and loses his job because the locals feel it brings shame upon them. A Texas millonaire begs to differ and finances the local footy star to search for it in the surrounding bush. Also this was self published in 1994. I still have a few copies left decaying in my garage if anyone wants to buy a collector's item.
Major BS: A Top Secret Mission (Humor)
1 chapters   —   updated May 13, 2015 06:31PM
Description: Paperback print-on-demand version about a bumbling British former army officer, Major Jeremy Billycock-Smythe, who marries into cash-poor but artistocratic family in Australia and launches an enterprise to save his wife's historic homestead Rowbottom from bankruptcy. Along the way, he finds and loses some illegal refugees, and seriously annoys his childhood friend, officials in charge of government secrets, and a bunch of high-powered executives. On one level, it's all satirical. But if people don't get the satire, hopefullly it's just funny on another level. There are no American characters but there is an important US link. It has been a Print on Demand book for a year or so now but I've just launched it as an ebook on Amazon and I'm thrilled that it's now within the reach of a global readership http://www.amazon.com/Major-Top-Secret-Mission-ebook/dp/B005MEZUFY/ (US$3.99). http://www.amazon.co.uk/Major-Top-Secret-Mission-ebook/dp/B005MEZUFY (£2.83). The print and ink version is still available for $AUS27.92 and you can order it via my web site, www.dunno.com.au or straight from the publisher, http://www.equilibriumbooks.com/majorbs.htm Reviews: http://www.dunno.com.au/bsreviews.html Q&A: http://www.dunno.com.au/jkminterview.htm You can read the first chapter free at http://www.freado.com/player/bookplayer.php?contentid=4763&authorid=3759&preview=1 and you can also download a free sample from Amazon.
Major BS: A Top Secret Mission (Humor)
1 chapters   —   updated Jan 22, 2012 01:47AM
Description: Ebook version about a bumbling British former army officer, Major Jeremy Billycock-Smythe, who marries into cash-poor but artistocratic family in Australia and launches an enterprise to save his wife's historic homestead Rowbottom from bankruptcy. Along the way, he finds and loses some illegal refugees, and seriously annoys his childhood friend, officials in charge of government secrets, and a bunch of high-powered executives. On one level, it's all satirical. But if people don't get the satire, hopefullly it's just funny on another level. There are no American characters but there is an important US link. It has been a Print on Demand book for a year or so now but I've just launched it as an ebook on Amazon and I'm thrilled that it's now within the reach of a global readership http://www.amazon.com/Major-Top-Secret-M... (US$3.99). http://www.amazon.co.uk/Major-Top-Secret... (£2.83). The print and ink version is still available for $AUS27.92 and you can order it via my web site, www.dunno.com.au or straight from the publisher, http://www.equilibriumbooks.com/majorbs.... Reviews: http://www.dunno.com.au/bsreviews.html Q&A: http://www.dunno.com.au/jkminterview.htm... You can read the first chapter free at http://www.freado.com/player/bookplayer.... and you can also download a free sample from Amazon.
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HITS ALL THE TROPES

I picked up this book because I liked both TV series Vera and Shetland, so was was curious where the magic started. In one way, I wasn’t disappointed. The author excels in the genre. Good writing, interesting characters, a strong d
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HITS ALL THE TROPES

I picked up this book because I liked both TV series Vera and Shetland, so was was curious where the magic started. In one way, I wasn’t disappointed. The author excels in the genre. Good writing, interesting characters, a strong d
...more
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I am so embarrassed! Please don't tell anyone I was doing the wrong accents in my head when I started reading this novel.
It was an honest mistake.
I choose this book because it has some crossover with stuff I try to write, and I like to see how others
...more
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I've long thought Donald Trump must have strayed from the pages on a funny Carl Hiassen novel. No-one else could invent a character as outrageous as him, right?
I am pleased to say even if I were wrong, I was right.
Trump fits seamlessly into his part
...more
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Tickling the funnybone

This is a novel full of small absurdities and observations of the ridiculous, which have an accumulative effect on the funnybone. Written in a crisp, no-nonsense style beloved by Scandinavian writers, this, as the author has sai
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“The early worm gets eaten by the early bird.”
John Martin

Topics Mentioning This Author

topics posts views last activity  
Making Connections: 4537. - MAJOR BS AND THE ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS by John Martin 1 8 Sep 03, 2016 08:02AM  
Aussie Readers: Reviewers sought for funny mystery 2 10 Sep 19, 2016 03:48AM  
2021 Reading Chal...: Agnieszka's 250+ books 15 222 Jul 26, 2019 01:23AM  
2021 Reading Chal...: Agnieszka's archives 2016-2019 26 185 Jan 01, 2020 05:59AM  
All Challenges Al...: Laur’s Challenges (2021) 20 9 Feb 17, 2021 07:06PM  
The Lost Challenges: When I Grow Up Challenge 150 292 Apr 26, 2021 12:10PM  
Aussie Readers: Free/low priced Kindle, ebooks & audio 3859 1351 May 05, 2021 09:30PM  
Aussie Readers: Annual Challenge A-Z Titles 2021 196 207 May 08, 2021 06:28AM  
Gigi's Company: Title Game 6309 1378 18 hours, 21 min ago  
“The early worm gets eaten by the early bird.”
John Martin

“The first draft of anything is shit.”
Ernest Hemingway

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
Albert Einstein

“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx

“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
Mark Twain

57055 The Humour Club — 1465 members — last activity 1 hour, 49 min ago
A group for readers and writers of humorous fiction.
33825 How to Promote YOUR book on Amazon — 8033 members — last activity May 07, 2021 10:19AM
Are YOU an author? If so I am sure you are aware of how hard it can be to market your book successfully. There is so much you can do on Amazon.com to ...more
721 Aussie Readers — 6051 members — last activity 23 minutes ago
A group for all Australian Goodreads members (and those interested in Australia), no matter what they read!
26989 Goodreads Authors/Readers — 39507 members — last activity 35 minutes ago
This group is dedicated to connecting readers with Goodreads authors. It is divided by genres, and includes folders for writing resources, book websit ...more
58575 Advanced Copies for Review & Book Giveaways — 9616 members — last activity 21 minutes ago
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190112 Judging Book Covers - ALL. DAY. LONG. — 1251 members — last activity May 05, 2020 04:12AM
Yeah, we judge books by their covers - So What!
1449 Quirky humour — 410 members — last activity Dec 17, 2019 02:25AM
A group dedicated to Quirky Humour. Talk about wry, witty, quirky books. Or basically, books with an unusual or unconventional sense of humour. Don´t ...more
25350 THE JAMES MASON COMMUNITY BOOK CLUB — 6802 members — last activity 3 hours, 43 min ago
ALL GENRE COMMUNITY OF BOOK LOVERS-Perfect for those interested in good books of any genre, film and lively discussion!- from current fiction, thrille ...more
19126 The Mystery, Crime, and Thriller Group — 22577 members — last activity 46 minutes ago
May 2021 Group Reads - A Very Long Engagement by Sebastian Japrisot and Black Out by John Lawton _ _ _ _ _ “It was a dark and stormy night. Lightning ...more
109839 Short & Sweet Treats — 1312 members — last activity Apr 19, 2021 10:04AM
Welcome to Short & Sweet Treats! We are here to read books together, engage in discussions, and have fun. We play lots of games and read lots of go ...more
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Comments (showing 1-37)    post a comment »
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message 37: by John

John Martin Just a heads-up. My ebook version of my funny mystery novel Who Knew Tasmanian Tigers Eat Apples! by John Martin is now free from Amazon, B&N, Apple and Kobo.

books2read.com/u/4DAkyr


message 36: by Scott

Scott Roberts Merry Christmas


message 35: by John

John Martin To celebrate the release of the new cover for Escape from Mad Bill's Island by John Martin , I'm offering free review copies.
You can download a free copy of my book in Kindle or ePub format:
Kindle - https://books.pronoun.com/serve/1131c...
ePub - https://books.pronoun.com/serve/1131c...
Of course, a review on Amazon or Goodreads isn't obligatory. But it helps other readers decide if a book is worth reading, and it helps shape what I might write next.


message 34: by Carolyn

Carolyn Hi John, thanks for the friend request!


message 33: by Stacy

Stacy Merry Christmas John!!!!!!!!!


TyCobbsTeeth TyCobbsTeeth Hi John,
Sorry to be slow responding.
Thanks for connecting with me on GR.
Hope you have a great week.
Cheers!
Rob


message 31: by Orient

Orient

Nice to meet you in GR universe :)


message 30: by Majenta

Majenta Hi, John, just wanted to let you know that I've left reviews of MAJOR BS here and at Amazon. Thanks for the opportunity! Keep writing! I hope you're having a good week. Blessings!

Best wishes from Majenta


message 29: by John

John Martin FREE FOR FIVE DAYS
My funny (with pathos) novel, Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants.
Reviews appreciated.

https://www.amazon.com/Major-BS-illeg...
Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants by John Martin


message 28: by John

John Martin Anyone want to review my latest novel? I can send you a .mobi file or a PDF.

https://www.amazon.com.au/Major-BS-il...Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants by John Martin


message 26: by John

John Martin Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants by John Martin Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants


If anyone's interested in reviewing this ebook, which comes out in the next few days, give me a hoy at jkmdunno@gmail.com
I can send you a pdf or, alternatively, I plan to make the book free for five days at Amazon from September 2. All I want is an honest review at Amazon and/or Goodreads.


message 25: by John

John Martin New Zealand editor Anne-Marie Emerson McDonald has been casting her eagle eyes over my novel, which is on schedule for release as an ebook next week.
You can preorder it here.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01G4JJCPO#...Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants by John Martin


message 24: by Majenta

Majenta Hi, John! Thanks for contacting me, Friend Request Accepted, thanks for Requesting! Good to hear from another author! Congratulations on your books! Happy reading, writing, and everything else. Have a great writing day. I like the Hemingway quote about the first draft of anything being... Well, that could sometimes mean the ! the person went through and is now writing about! But, no, I think I understand what he meant. And I hope you don't have to deal with a lot of ! in your life. Blessings!

Best wishes from Majenta


message 23: by John

John Martin READ THE FIRST CHAPTER FREE. What's he going to do with 12 Illegal Immigrants he's accidentally rescued. http://ow.ly/xamG302DJtj
Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants by John Martin


message 22: by John

John Martin Humour with pathos. PRE-ORDER MY NEW E-NOVEL from Amazon. http://ow.ly/WlNS302x3MXMajor BS and the Illegal Immigrants Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants by John Martin


message 21: by John

John Martin Forty-six years ago today I sat in my grade six classroom watching Neil Armstrong step on the moon via a black and white television. It was about the same quality of transmission as the ultra-sound of my son when he was but a foetus almost 22 years ago.

Fast forward to 2016 and a moon landing figures in my collection of funny flash fiction, Romeo and Julie.

It's one of 16 stories, and the good news is the ebook is currently free to download from Amazon, http://ow.ly/EqkH302sbUK

Find out who got the cocoa pops from the Variety Pack they took with them on the lunar landing module. Find out, too, who is most annoyed with his snap shots photo-processing lab.

Read also samples from my three upcoming novels. I call them funny novels with pathos.

Romeo and Julie Romeo and Julie by John Martin


message 20: by John

John Martin Romeo and Julie Romeo and Julie by John Martin
FREE July 18 to 22: Gorgonzola entree is served ahead of three funny new novels. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01EF0BVQW/... … … via @amazon #ComedyBookWeek


message 19: by John

John Martin Get your free download tomorrow (July 15) and Saturday (July 16) of my ebook of flash fiction from Amazon http://ow.ly/psYP302bp4m I'm participating in #ComedyBookWeek and I've updated the book and added sample chapters from my new upcoming novels, Romeo and Julie Romeo and Julie by John Martin


message 18: by John

John Martin My participation in ‪#‎ComedyBookWeek‬ is paltry, but I was caught unawares this year. Who knew there was such a thing? I threw one book of flash fiction, Romeo and Julie, into the ring.
Find out more at https://comedybookweek.com


message 16: by John

John Martin Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants Major BS and the Illegal Immigrants by John Martin

My novel is due out on August 23 but you can pre-order now --

http://ow.ly/TTgy300ymYW (Australia, $4.85),
http://ow.ly/HmC7300ytAC (US, $3.50) and
http://ow.ly/NeIG300ytEQ (UK, £2.41)


message 15: by John

John Martin http://ow.ly/oWVR300t0jq Major BS rises again


message 14: by John

John Martin Fifty-one stories from a father. Diverse topics include the day he came to call himself a man in a fountain of pee, to the day he drove the getaway trolley at the teddy bears' picnic.
http://ow.ly/4nm6l1
Jack and the Jellybean Stalk by John Martin Jack and the Jellybean Stalk


message 13: by John

John Martin I have new blog entries up at my Amazon author page. http://www.amazon.com/John-Martin/e/B...


message 12: by John

John Martin Offer ends today. My short story collection is still free at Amazon Australia, http://ow.ly/4mV5E8

Romeo and Julie by John Martin Romeo and Julie


message 11: by John

John Martin I feel like the guy in the silly hat out the front of the sideshow. "Hurry, hurry. Step right up for the greatest show on earth."

Only it's not that momentus. But my book is still free on Amazon Australia http://ow.ly/4mV2Mn for a limited time. So hurry, hurry. Step right up.

Romeo and Julie by John Martin Romeo and Julie


message 10: by John

John Martin For those people living in the Northern Hemisphere and still slaving away towards the weekend, I feel the need to gloat. My Friday after work is here already. Now, what to read?


message 9: by James

James Thanks for the friend request!


Robert Thanks for the friend request, John.


message 7: by John (last edited Jan 09, 2012 05:01AM)

John Martin It's easy to like Mike Rokyo's stuff, jan.
He had the right mix for me of humour, anger and sensitivities.
When i entered journalism as a copyboy in 1976, one of my first jobs was to tear up the paper from the telex machine as it arrived and arrange it in piles - news, sport,features etc for the various editors.
Royko's columns reached us in Tasmania via worldwide syndication and was used inb our newspaper each week. But I read it first, so much so that I probably neglected the other piles a bit. Thus began my aspiration to write like Royko. I never reached it buyt, boy, I still read that collection from time to time and dream.


message 6: by Jan C

Jan C Thanks for the friend request, John.

As a Chicagoan, I've got to say that anyone who has Royko on their shelf, can't be all bad.


Sammy Goode Thank you for the friendvite--looking forward to chatting online with you!


message 4: by Becca

Becca Hi John :)


Rogier Thank you for the friend add


message 2: by Simon

Simon Thanks for looking me up, John.


Tamara Rose Blodgett Thanks for your friendship John and welcome to GR~! ;)


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