Amanda Ching's Blog, page 3
January 1, 2015
2014 Year in Books, Chinghaus
It’s been a long time since I have blogged, BUT I WANT TO CHANGE THAT, and since this is the perfect time to embrace one’s OCD by tweaking behavioral shifts to the start of a new year, I am kicking back with a drink called the Bloody Carrie:
From Tequila Mockingbird: Cocktails with a Literary Twist, by Tim Federle.
Aw yeah.
This is my year-end review in books! I read 150 books this year, not counting rereads. I did include some books I did for editing jobs, mostly because I have to read edits tw...
April 25, 2014
New Short: One Night Only [NSFW]
A while back, Riptide had a call for stories about johns, and I started this thing. I never made it into the sub call because I am slow, but this was too nice not to share. Graphic depictions of sex.
For some mysterious reason, all the tricks got excited when the second Wednesday of the month rolled around. The three main streets where they could surreptitiously (or obnoxiously) hang things out to dry (and be picked up, for a nominal fee) vibrated with a special energy. Boys who usually had no...
April 22, 2014
Start of new short story.
In the interests of trying to make myself write, I dusted off a few exercises. A few nanos ago I decided I was gonna do one short story a day for November, and every one was going to begin with a fortune cookie fortune and word. I dutifully started them all, but never followed through. So here we go.
You cannot run away from yourself; you’re always right behind you.
(LEARN CHINESE – Chicken. ji ròu)
Gaspard and Carl found the bay in the emergency room easily enough. There were only five of them...
November 28, 2013
Happy Guilty-Relief Day
I was trying to think of things I am thankful for, and then I was trying to figure out how to list them. Then I had a sip of coffee. Then I thought about how thankfulness is innate sometimes, and I feel worse for stating my thanks. Then I had a sip of coffee. Then I wondered who I was thanking. Then I decided I was more grateful. Then I realized that I’m appreciative. Then I had a sip of coffee.
Then I realized I am lucky. I am lucky to have been born here at this time, and in this country, es...
November 21, 2013
…in which I am obvs an adult and kid is right.
Viv: I want to be a mailman!
Me: Really?
Viv: Yeah! A MAILMAN!
Me: Well, I am sure that’s a fun job.
Viv: I will deliver all the mail!
Me: Well, I hate to break it to you honey, but by the time you’re old enough to be a mailman, that job might not be available anymore. Not like it is now.
Viv: Whaaaaaa?
Me: Well, see since the start of email, people just don’t send as much mail, and the post office has been having money problems, and so they have to downsize and make themselves smaller so that they...
November 11, 2013
Short Story: Registry
Title: Registry
“It’s not like there’s a Chinese gay kama sutra,” Wei Min says, leafing through the pages in the book. “Seriously, how is that even possible? We invented noodles.”
I can’t even look. It doesn’t matter because I have three ties slung over my shoulders and I have no idea which one I’m supposed to wear. They all look the same although Wei Min assures me that they are not.
“I’m editing the drawings, and then we can wrap it,” Wei Min says. I can see him in the mirror, Sharpie in hand,...
November 9, 2013
Got the phat brew on the reel.
Firstly, let us all take a moment to appreciate the fine lyrical genius of Salt N Pepa’s 1993 masterpiece, “Whatta Man”, the Bechdel-strangling powerhouse ballad performed with nineties flash-paper early Destiny’s Child predecessor, En Vogue:
What a man, what a man, what a man what a mighty good man
What a man, what a man, what a man what a mighty good man…
That said, I recently tried Caribou Coffee’s offering, called Mahogany.
I want to take a minute or two, and give much respect due
To the coff...
November 8, 2013
Sleepus interruptus.
Scene: fair Verona Amanda’s room, 3:36 am
Me: (snore)
Vi: (entering) mumble mumble mumble
Me: snggegeeegerrgrrg–what?
Her: mumble mumble mumble bees.
Me: (sits bolt upright) THERE ARE NO BEES. (flops over. back to sleep.) Snggegeeegerrgrr….
Her: Okay…(shuffles back to bed)
Me: (snore)
November 7, 2013
Why You Should Never Hesitate to Write Fandoms You Don’t Know
Amand-r wrote: I CLAIM ALL THE SCARECROW AND MRS. KING FANFIC OUT THERE.
Foxy wrote: I want to read Amand-r Scarecrow and Mrs King fic right now.
Amand-r wrote:
Mrs King pushed her crown back onto her head. “Hurry Scarecrow, King Friday will be back any minute.”
Scarecrow shoved three straw fingers into–
Look I can’t do that.
“I knew the last time we solved that predictable mystery together that we were destined for this,” Scarecrow purred. “And now that I have a brain, I can think with both my hea...
November 6, 2013
April, 2011, That Monty Python Spam-Eggs-Spam Skit
It’s not as fun to reenact as you might think.
Me: Okay, before you watch this, you must go upstairs and put underpants on under your nightgown.
Her: (doing splits and the like all over the carpet) I don’t like underpants.
Me: I don’t recall asking you.
Her: But I don’t need them.
Me: Yeah, you do. Go and get some on.
Her: I don’t like underpants.
Me: This does not bode well for your future. Anyway, you have two choices—go upstairs and put underpants on, or go upstairs and get dressed. Which…now tha...
