Denise Grover Swank's Blog, page 4
January 24, 2016
A Business Plan for Indie Authors–Part Two
****This post was originally published on The Writer’s Guide to ePublishing on October 6, 2012****
This is the second part of a three part series on MY business plan as a self-published author.
Just remember, what works for me or is important to me may not work for you. My hope is if you are a self-published author, this will make you think more about the business part of your career.
The first part covers the table of contents, the business description and the business ownership and location.
****
3. Products
Products are my books, obviously. But they have also come to include audiobooks, a few items I have for sale through Zazzle, and a few products related to my books (t-shirts, an apron, and bracelets) which are not mentioned below.
Products Offered by Bramagioia Enterprises
Novels are offered in several eBook formats and print books. Approximately 95% of all books sold are digital. It is unclear if novellas will be offered in print format.
Currently available from Bramagioia Enterprises:
Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes (A Rose Garner Mystery) – released July 12, 2011
Chosen (The Chosen #1) released September 18, 2011
Hunted (The Chosen #2) released November 22, 2011
Here (On the Otherside #1) released November 8, 2011
Planned for 2012:
Sacrifice (The Chosen #3)—planned release March 23, 2012
Twenty-Nine and a Half Reasons (A Rose Gardner Mystery #2)—planned release June 2012
There (On the Otherside #2) –October 2012
Possible for 2012:
Untitled Novella prequel to The Chosen Series—November or December 2012 release
Planned for 2013:
Untitled (The Chosen #4)—February 2013
Untitled (On the Otherside #3) June 2013 (subject to change)
Untitled (A Rose Gardener Mystery) Fall 2013 (subject to change)
Possible 2013
Novella of unknown subject
Development of one or more new series
This has changed drastically. For several reasons and in several ways.
First, I changed my production schedule.
You read that correctly. My books are on a production schedule. At this moment I have a 3×4 foot white board with the WEEKLY production schedule for four books. But more on this in Part Three. What’s important to note here is: Your business plan is not carved in stone. It’s called a plan and plans change. You should have a good reason to change a plan, but just because you have it in print (in a Word document or on a white board) obviously doesn’t mean you have to hold to it if other indicators point you in a different direction.
What changed? I switched the release of my YA book THERE (On the Otherside #2) with the release of the fourth The Chosen book, now titled REDEMPTION. The Chosen series is much more popular than my YA series and I tend to leave my books with a bit of a cliff hanger ending. So it made sense to put out REDEMPTION before THERE to make my readers happy.
Also, because my YA sells fewer books compared to my other series, I cut the series to two books instead of writing three. The story can be comfortably wrapped up in two books and it makes more sense to spend three to four months writing a book that will sell 25,000-30,000 or more copies in a year instead of a book that will sell 10,000-12,000 in a year.
It was THIS moment, when I came to this realization I knew I really made the switch to thinking like a business owner. Don’t get me wrong. If I really, really want to write something, yet I don’t think it will sell very well, I’ll still do it. But I have to look at my books as a product. Do I want to make money? I do. Then I need to write things that I think will sell well and plan accordingly.
4. Pricing Strategy
Taken directly from my plan:
Digital:
In July of 2011, Denise Grover Swank was an unknown debut author without publishing house backing. Pricing strategy was based partially on the models created by successful self-published authors Amanda Hocking and John Locke. They priced their books at $0.99 to foster high sales.
The strategy for Bramagioia Enterprises was to provide the debut novels of two series in two different genres at $0.99 to establish the author and generate positive reviews. Then, after proving to readers that Denise Grover Swank provides entertaining, well-written stories, the prices of future books would raised to $2.99. The possibility of offering future books in a series at $3.99 is still under consideration.
Turbulence in the rapidly changing eBook world should also be taken into consideration. Pricing may be subject to change based on sales, current pricing trends and need to create upward movement in Amazon rankings. Books may be discounted or offered for free if it fits with marketing strategy and promotion.
Digital prices of current products:
Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes: $0.99
Chosen: $0.99
Hunted: $2.99
Here: $2.99
Proposed pricing for 2012:
Chosen: Raise to $2.99 after a two day free promo
Sacrifice: $2.99
Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes: Raise price to $2.99 with release of new cover
Twenty-Nine and a Half Reasons: $2.99
There: $2.99
Untitled novella: Undetermined. Either $0.99 or $1.99, depending on length.
Proposed pricing for 2013
Untitled (The Chosen #4): undetermined $2.99 or $3.99
Untitled (On the Other side #3) undetermined $2.99 or $3.99
Untitled (Rose Gardner Mystery) undetermined $2.99 or $3.99
Novella of Unknown subject: undetermined $0.99 or $1.99 depending on length
Print:
All print books will be created through Createspace unless it is determined another source is better. Pricing on print books is largely based on the number of pages in the book. Pricing is also dependant on making print books available for a wider distribution than just Amazon. Since a wider distribution is used, books must be priced so that the other outlets will be offered wholesale pricing. A book between 360-380 pages is $14.99. A book between 340-360 pages is $13.99.
These pages also changed. After studying the market, I raised several of my books to $3.99 this past spring but raised and kept CHOSEN and TWENTY-EIGHT to $2.99.
5. Financial Plan
From all the business plans I studied, this was where the business made a plan for the future. Expected income. Expected expenses.
This section freaked me out. I had no clue what to plan. None. Then I realized to make an accurate plan, I had to look at the pattern of my previous sales. I was at the disadvantage of only having a couple of months (or less) of sales to base projections, so taking that into account, I decided to error on the side of conservatism.
This is my longest section, consisting of seven pages. The first page and a half look at the previous year’s sales totals per book, per month, then the yearly total.
Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes: (July 12)
July: 209
August: 441
September: 947
October: 1787
November: 942
December: 1195
Total: 5521
I did this for each book. Then came up with totals for sales in digital and print format, as well as borrows from the KDP Select program.
Percentage format sales in 2011:
Digital: 96%
Print: 0.7%
Borrows: 3%
Observations of 2011 sales:
Through research, Bramagioia Enterprises learned that self-published books usually start with slow sales, then typically double each month. After a climb, the book plateaus for a time then falls. The fall may be gradual or it may tumble. Still, it usually manages to maintain some level of sales. Book reviews and book review blog tours boosted sales. Special promos tend to spike sales, but then the sales fall to pre-promo levels.
Readers of one genre rarely crossed genres unless devoted fans, thus each book in a new genre climbed at the same rate as its predecessors. The second book in a series at the top of a genre climbs into the top ranks immediately.
Print books sales more than doubled the month of December, presumably for Christmas gifts.
KDP Select created radical changes in the way Amazon promotes SP books. By agreeing to the program, the book is sold exclusively through Amazon. Books enrolled in the program are eligible to be borrowed and receive a portion of a pool of money per month dependant on percentage of borrows. Borrows counted as sales in rankings, thus creating a strong disadvantage for those not enrolled. Bramagioia Enterprises enrolled Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes, Chosen and Hunted into KDP Select for a 90 day commitment. Here was not enrolled. Borrows accounted for 3% of “Sales” but one book was enrolled for three weeks and two books were enrolled for two and a half weeks.
I also broke down each book and what I’d done for promotion and recorded its highest and lowest sales days including the dates. It was then I could make my predictions for 2012.
I wrote down my anticipated sales per month, multiplied that number by what I earn from royalties, added in expected expenses (promotion, a new cover for TWENTY-EIGHT) then came up with the expected earnings from all four ALREADY published books.
I then came up with anticipated expenses for upcoming book releases, expected sales (figured conservatively), and my expected profit for the year.
Here is TWENTY-NINE AND A HALF REASONS, which came out in June, as anticipated by the business plan.
Twenty-Nine and a Half Reasons is expected to have moderate sales but nothing like The Chosen series. It will sell well its first three to four months and taper off to a steady level.
June (100) July (300) August (600): 1000 books at $2: $2000
September to December: (800 per month) 3200 at $2: $6400
Total books: 4200
Total: $8400
Expenses:
Developmental edit: $1300
Copy Edit: $700
Cover: $400
Createspace: $50
eBook format: $35
Book tours (2): $500
Total: $2985
Expected profit of Twenty-Nine and a Half Reasons: $5415
First of all, the monetary sales totals were based off of an anticipated $2.99 price, which was actually $3.99 at release. Also, my sales were much higher than I had planned. TWENTY-NINE AND A HALF REASONS was released on June 27, 2012 and sold 297 copies in June. It sold 3470 copies in July and 1774 in August. I had projected 1000 in that time period, when I actually sold 5541. I’ve already sold more than I expected to sell the entire rest of 2012. Which, in my opinion, isn’t a bad thing. I’d rather shoot low and hope for more.
On the other hand, I’ve had expenses I didn’t plan for. In the past, I used readers for proof readers. I’ve since switched to professionals. I also did a giveaway in conjunction with the release. I didn’t budget for that.
After I listed every book, I then had a list of additional expenses:
Other Business expenses:
RT Booklovers Convention: $2000
RWA annual convention: $3000
Business cards, supplies, etc: $300
Misc: $500
Website upgrades and new sites for three series: $800
Total: $6600
(I didn’t go to RWA but I’ve already spent more than budgeted for websites and other promotional materials. I’m also going to NINC in October.)
After I added up the expected profit for each book, I added them all together, subtracted Other Business Expenses and came up with my expected profit for 2012. Which was more than I realized I could make.
But to make money, and keep releasing products, I needed a schedule.
Tomorrow I’ll discuss the rest of my business plan, including a production schedule, a marketing plan, long term goals and a summary.
A Business Plan for Indie Authors–Part One
****This post was originally published on The Writer’s Guide to ePublishing on October 5, 2012****
This is the first part of a three part series on MY business plan as a self-published author. So many people have heard about my twenty-three page business plan and 1) wondered how I found enough material to fill twenty-three pages 2) heard I wrote a twenty-three page business plan and were too intimidated to try it or 3) both.
Just remember, what works for me or is important to me may not work for you. My hope is if you are a self-published author, this will make you think more about the business part of your career.
****
When I self-published my first book in July of 2011, my goal was to sell 1000 books by December 31. Six months. At the time, it seemed like a pie-in-the-sky dream. I’d done my research and everything I found said self-publishing was a long tail venture. You start off slow and steadily build your sales—and your readers. Estimates for a first month’s expected sales were around 20-50 books. If I was lucky. And then hopefully, double sales the second month.
What I didn’t count on were the benefits of the social media platform I’d been building for a couple of years. I sold 209 books my first month and 441 books my second. In September, I sold 947 books, obviously hitting my dare-to-dream goal of 1000 books within two months of my release instead of six. (I’m not ashamed to admit that I sobbed like a baby.)
By the end of December, I’d published three more books. (Three of the four were my query backlist) When I looked at the number of books I’d sold–26,000 for the year–I realized I could really make money self-publishing books.
Only I needed a plan.
I realized that there were two parts to this venture. There was the creative, author side that used my imagination and wrote fantastical tales. But even though I hadn’t acknowledged it before, I was a small business owner, and my company sold a product. Books. If I wanted to be successful, I needed to think like a business. My brother had opened a wholesale florist warehouse in Louisville, Kentucky a few years earlier, and part of setting up his venture included writing a business plan. I decided I needed a business plan too.
I’m not gonna lie. I was intimidated. When I started searching the internet for examples, there wasn’t much available for authors. (There are many more now.) So I studied the few writer’s sites I found but decided to go with a more strict business plan like you can find on the Small Business Association (sba.gov). I just picked what sections I found most important. I’m going to share my original business plan and also how it’s changed since I first wrote it.
My business plan is twenty-three pages but don’t let that page count intimidate you. I’m going to take you through it section by section. The first page is a title page that says 2012 Business Plan for Bramagioia Enterprises. The second is my TOC page:
Table of Contents
1. Description of Bramagioia Enterprises
2. Ownership of Bramagioia Enterprises and Location of Business
3. Products
4. Pricing Strategy
5. Financial Plan
6. Production Schedule and Writing Plans
7. Targeted Audience
8. Marketing and Promoting Plan
9. Web Plan
10. Long Term Goals
11. Summary
You can see that I came up with a business name– Bramagioia Enterprises. (Bramagioia is Italian for “yearning for joy” which has a special significance to me.) I use this business name as the publisher when I upload my books on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, etc. I also consulted an accountant to determine whether my business should be a sole proprietorship or an LLC. Taking into account the tax laws in the state I reside, Missouri, he determined at this time it would be to my advantage to remain a sole proprietorship. My business has a license in the city I reside in and I’m registered with the state.
1) Description of Business
I followed the strict business plan guides and verbiage for these first few pages and honestly, I found it very enlightening. It made me think of my venture as an actual business instead of me playing let’s pretend. Here’s my description:
Description of Bramagioia Enterprises
The purpose of Bramagioia Enterprises is to spearhead the publishing and merchandising the written creations of Denise Grover Swank. Most creations are novels although some will include novellas, short stories, and flash fiction. Genres at this time include urban fantasy, humorous southern mystery, and young adult paranormal/science fiction. All creations will be available to the public for sale via eBooks and print for novels.
As of January 1st, 2012, Bramagioia Enterprises will provide Denise Grover Swank with minimum income of $1000 per month, which will be raised as needed, when finances are available. All remaining funds will be left in a bank account until further action is deemed necessary. Denise Grover Swank may only take funds that are not allocated for future expenses for the year.
When I created this plan, I set my expectations quite low, but aimed high. Thus I made my monthly personal income from my business pretty low. I’ve since given myself a raise. But not much of one. I think the key point for paragraph two is that I see all funds coming in from my books and related products as part of my business. I can’t just spend money allocated to the business for personal expenses.
You’ll also see that while I am the owner of Bramagioia Enterprises, I refer to the business and myself as in third person, just like an author bio.
2. Ownership of Bramagioia Enterprises and Location of Business
Again, continuing the business model, I forced myself to look at my business (Bramagioia Enterprises) and my expectations for it through a business lens.
Ownership of Bramagioia Enterprises and Location of Business
Bramagioia Enterprises is a sole proprietorship operated and managed by Denise Grover Swank. Bramagioia Enterprises currently has no employees. Consultants such as accountants and attorneys may be hired to offer professional expertise and services. Other professionals will be used to aid the preparation of the creative works of Denise Grover Swank to be made available for sale through various outlets. Such professionals may include but are not limited to: Cover designers, developmental editors, copy editors, proof readers, and book formatters.
Bramagioia Enterprises may need to contract professionals or agents to handle foreign rights or movie right sales or any other rights outside of the realm of expertise for Bramagioia Enterprises. This option will be pursued if the need arises.
Bramagioia Enterprises will be run and operated in a designated office on the residential premises of Denise Grover Swank. Bramagioia Enterprises will provide Denise Grover Swank with a desk and desktop computer, a printer, and a laptop for mobility. Additional software and equipment will be provided if finances are sufficient and a need has been demonstrated.
This has changed. I now have a part-time personal assistant. I also have an agent to help with foreign rights and film rights. I’ve also consulted a literary attorney for contract review.
Another important note is the third paragraph. My business provides my business equipment. I actually have this budgeted into expenses.
Tomorrow will focus on what my products are, my pricing strategy, and how I came up with my financial plan.
November 29, 2015
Rose Gardner Mystery Series End Coming May 2016
A couple of weeks ago I hosted a two hour Facebook Q&A event about the Rose Gardner Mystery series. Toward the end of my two hours, I made a announcement that shocked many of my readers.
Thirty-Six and a Half Motives will be the last Rose Gardner Mystery.
This decision wasn’t made lightly, and honestly, I feel a little sick typing that. I love Rose but the outcry from many readers is that they want an end. I’ve stated before that Thirty-Six would resolve many of the outstanding questions as well as wrap up the J.R. arc. But after many, many months of discussion with my editor (honestly, since January, 2015) I’ve decided that it might be best to end the series.
HOWEVER…
…that won’t be the end of Rose. When my editor and I began to discuss an ending to the series, we also discussed what would become of Rose. I’m lucky that Angela loves Rose as much as I do and neither of us are ready to say goodbye to her just yet. Hopefully, a lot of readers feel the same way.
So in late 2016, I’ll release the first book of a new series with Rose and Neely Kate working on getting their private investigator license. Most of the characters from the Rose Gardner Mystery will follow them to the new still unnamed series. So in many ways, it will still be the Rose Gardner Mystery series with a new series title. I plan for the first book to start in the summer immediately following the end of Thirty-Six and a Half Motives.
Most of the readers in the Q&A were excited the new series but some said they wouldn’t continue. Honestly, that’s okay. Sometimes readers need to move on. I understand that and this way those readers can make a clean break. But I hope the rest of you will follow Rose and Neely Kate and love the new series just as much, if not more than the current one.
But before Thirty-Six, I will release the first book of a new mystery series: Center Stage: A Magnolia Steele Mystery, which releases March 15, 2016. I’ve started writing Center Stage and Magnolia has quickly become one of my favorite characters. I plan to release the first chapter in the next month, so be looking for that. In the meantime, it’s available for an exclusive preorder on iBooks.
Thirty-Six and a Half Motives will release on May 17, 2016 and is also available on iBooks for an exclusive preorder. Amazon preorders should be available around the middle of February. (If I had my choice it would be available for preorder on Amazon now, but their rules hold me to 90 days out.) There will be no bonus chapters nor a novella.
For those of you who have become loyal readers to Rose–thank you. You have no idea how much joy I get from not only from writing this series, but hearing that you love it too. I promise to do my best to give the series the best wrap up possible. And I promise to give Rose and Neely Kate a fantastic new beginning.
August 24, 2015
Winner of the #DGSRoseGiveaway Contest!!!
I’m SO EXCITED to announce the winner of the #DGSRosegiveaway!!! Thank you to EVERYONE who entered!!! It means so much to me that you want to meet me.
But there can only be one winner so……
The winner is Ruthie Logan Parrish!!! Congrats Ruthie!!! I can’t wait to meet you!!!
August 3, 2015
Win a trip to Kansas City to meet Denise!
To celebrate the release of Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes in bookstores on August 11, I’m about to announce the biggest contest I’ve ever offered!!!
AND I AM SO EXCITED!!!
Check out the details in my video:
Here’s what you can win:
Airfare for the winner and a guest to Kansas City, Missouri (continental US only)
A private car to and from the airport
Two nights stay in the Kansas City Marriott Country Club Plaza Hotel (Friday and Saturday)
$500 gift card to the Country Club Plaza
Dinner with Denise Grover Swank
The contest runs from August 11-August 23. ONE winner will be announced on August 24.
How do you enter?
Take a selfie of you holding a print copy of Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes. IT MUST BE THE NEW COVER. Any photos of the old cover will not qualify. Post your photos with the hashtag #DGSRoseGiveaway to Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. You can post it to one or all three. Each posting will equal one entry.
The fine print:
The photo must be a selfie with the new cover (Posted above.)
Airline tickets are for the continental US only and will be purchased by Denise Grover Swank or someone working on her behalf.
One winner is chosen and picks her or his guest.
Winner receives accommodations for one hotel room for two nights. Any incidentals incurred during the winner’s stay (ex: Room service, movie rental, etc.) will be paid for by the winner.
Private car will be arranged by Denise Grover Swank or someone working on her behalf.
$500 gift card may not be redeemed for cash.
Dinner will be at a restaurant of Denise’s choosing. She will pay for the meal for the winner and her guest.
Only entries to Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram will count
Entries must use the hashtag #DGSRoseGiveaway to qualify.
Employees, former employees, close friends, and family members of Denise Grover Swank are not qualified to win.
Purchase not necessary to enter.
July 31, 2015
Preorder The Gambler
Available September 1, 2015
Preorder:
iBooks
Amazon US
Amazon UK
Nook
Kobo
Google Play (Coming soon)
Goodreads
Libby St. Clair believes in fate—so much so, she’s willing to pin everything on a curse a fortune teller placed on her and her two best friends when they were kids. The curse, that each of them will marry before thirty, have a disaster of a wedding, and end up with a man other than her original fiancé, has come to fruition for both of her friends, who are now deliriously happy. But Libby’s attempt to quick-start the curse by proposing to her wrong-for-her boyfriend ends in a wild dash from the altar. She’s rescued by her friend Noah, the only person who understands her impulsive decisions–because he’s the same way.
Having spent most of his adulthood fleeing responsibility and commitment, Noah McMillan is finally ready to grow up. Of course, figuring out how is still a work in progress. When he realizes he’s in love with Libby, he flies to Kansas City to put a stop to her wedding. But Libby’s already pulled a runaway bride. Eager to cheer her up and prove that he can be the man she deserves, he takes her on a madcap car trip that will bring them all the way to the City of Sin.
In Vegas, those who risk it all either win big or lose everything, so what will happen if Libby and Noah take a gamble on love?
The Wedding Pact Series:
#1 The Substitute (Megan)
#2 The Player (Blair)
#3 The Gambler (Libby)
June 24, 2015
PENNED Con Information
Penned Con is in St. Louis from July 23-25. I’ll be a keynote speaker this year and I’m also hosting a VIP party! The first fifty people to sign up will get free admittance to my party on Friday night. You’ll get a free drink ticket and access to my VIP room with appetizers and a cash bar. I’ve opened the invites to members of my Readers Community on Facebook. Soon I’ll send out a newsletter with a link to sign up. If you haven’t signed up for my newsletter, this is just one of many reasons to sign up.
You can sign up for my newsletter HERE.
I’ll be signing books at Penned Con! You can either bring your own or purchase books from me. I’l bring multiple copies but if you want to be guaranteed the book)s) you want, be sure to preorder them from the link below.
For more information about Penned Con, you can check it out HERE.
May 31, 2015
Thirty-Four and a Half Predicaments Bonus Scenes
Many, many readers have asked me to write a novella between Thirty-Four and a Half Predicaments and Thirty-Five and a Half Conspiracies, and I’ve said no. There will be no novella.
But…
That doesn’t mean there can’t be bonus scenes.
Over the summer, and maybe into the fall until the release of Thirty-Five in November, I’m going to release what I’m calling “bonus chapters.” These chapters fall between Thirty-Four and the beginning of Thirty-Five. They will all be strictly other character POVs. There might be one chapter. There might be two. I’m writing them as they fit into my crazy summer schedule.
I’ve written the first two chapters and I’m releasing them on Tuesday, June 2. Here’s a hint: The first chapter is from Mason’s POV.
How can you read them?
Like the previous novellas, I’ll post links and passwords to the chapters. I’ll be sending out several newsletters between now and November 3, so you’ll have to read the emails and see if the links and passwords are inside. Hint: These chapters are bonus, so they will not be leading my newsletters. The newsletters will be sent out for other reasons so the link and password will be a the bottom of the email.
Now a few things:
1) I have no idea how many chapters I will write. Again, I’m fitting these into my schedule. You’ll need to watch the newsletter so see if I’ve posted new chapters.
2) Yes, they are short. PLEASE do not message or email me that you’re upset and angry that they are too short. (Although I do recognize and appreciate good-natured posts saying you want more.) If you don’t like reading a few chapters at a time, then read the bonus material closer to the release of Thirty-Five.
3) No, I don’t know when I will post the last one. See #1.
4) I do not plan to put these chapters for sale. I usually put the novellas up for sale, but since I have no idea how many chapters there will be, I’ve decided to keep the content free. When Thirty-Five comes out, I will most likely put them at the end of Thirty-Four.
5) There is no title for these chapters other than “Thirty-Four And a Half Predicaments Bonus Chapters.”
6) Yes, I plan to include a chapter from Skeeter. 
7) No, I do not plan to include a chapter from Joe.
8) Yes, I am mean. My children will attest to this. 
9) I think most or all of the chapters take place the evening at the end of Thirty-Four. Consider them the reactions of supporting characters. This is truly bonus material.
10) If you have not read Thirty-Four and a Half Predicaments, THIS WILL HAVE MAJOR SPOILERS.
11) You will not have to read the bonus content to understand what’s going on in Thirty-Five and a Half Conspiracies. If anything important is mentioned, it will be repeated in Thirty-Five.
12) I’m writing this bonus material as a gift to y’all. Please, please, please do not email, message, or Tweet me to complain about the bonus material. I received so much negative feedback about the limited length of time Ripple of Secrets was available on my website that I considered not doing this at all.
All that being said, I really do like giving y’all extra reading material. And I really loved writing the first two chapters. I don’t always know what characters will do until I write them. Believe it or not, I worry about my characters too. I like seeing what they are doing.
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May 14, 2015
The Player Cover Reveal and Chapters Excerpt
iBooks
Amazon
Amazon UK
Amazon DE
Amazon AU
Amazon CA
B&N
Google Play
Print book
Blurb:
Book two in the USA Today bestselling The Wedding Pact series.
Divorce attorney Blair Hansen is convinced that marriage should be based on practicality, not passion. But as her own wedding approaches, she finds herself remembering her law school boyfriend, the only man she’s ever loved, and regretting what might have been. Then a twist of fate lands Garrett back in her life, and the man who loomed large in her past is suddenly casting a shadow over her wedding, making her question everything. To complicate matters further, the job she loves is in peril, and she can feel the ‘perfect’ life she’s fashioned for herself start to crumble under her feet. Could everything she’s believed about life and love be wrong?
Garrett Lowry is a divorce attorney who’s ready to settle down. The problem is that he can’t find a woman who suits him nearly as well as the one he loved and lost. He broke her heart by playing the field after their break up—something he’s always regretted. But after months of pining for Blair, Garrett stumbles across her in a freak coincidence—and then destiny keeps throwing them together, the coincidences becoming ever more unlikely. He’s convinced it’s a sign they should give their love a second chance, but Blair is engaged to another man—a man who is absolutely wrong for her.
Can Garrett convince Blair that a player once isn’t a player forever, and that happy endings aren’t just for dreamers?
*****
Excerpt:
Chapter One
Blair Hansen had always heard that near death experiences made people reevaluate their lives. She’d spent nearly thirty years sure about what she wanted in life, but all it had taken for her to start questioning everything was some severe turbulence on a 747.
She picked up her whiskey and took a healthy sip. No girly drinks for her. Blair had forced herself to drink whiskey until she liked it. Being tough—and letting other people know it—was how she’d gotten where she was in life. Which was currently in a hotel bar in Phoenix, Arizona, waiting to hear if they had a room for her to spend the night.
Of course, she wasn’t supposed to be away from home at all, let alone in Phoenix. She was getting married in five days, so her bosses had agreed to let her have a short four-day work week in their office in Kansas City, but then the senior partner had called her on Sunday afternoon with instructions to board a plane to Los Angeles. And that’s exactly what she had done. Despite the fact she had a million and one things to do for her wedding. Robert Sisco didn’t want to hear excuses. Sisco, Sisco, and Reece only wanted to hear yes and see lots of dollar signs on checks, and her understanding of that fact was one of the reasons she was so close to making junior partner. They didn’t want her wedding to interfere with her work. Even if they were the primary reason she was getting married in the first place. Partners were typically married, which probably had something to do with the illusion of stability and maturity. It was all a bunch of hooey, but Blair Hansen really wanted to be a partner.
She took another gulp of her drink, the ice clinking against her glass because of her shaking hand.
The thing was, she’d realized something. Her future life had flashed before her eyes in those awful minutes on board the plane, and she hadn’t liked the look of it.
Now she wasn’t so sure she wanted to get married after all.
On paper, Dr. Neil Fredrick was perfect for her. Educated, personable, stable. Conservative politically and fiscally. Neil was a firm believer in playing it safe. And stability was exactly what Blair wanted after bearing witness to her parents’ chaotic marriage—her father’s affairs, her parents’ subsequent divorce, and finally her father’s death, which had practically bankrupted the family.
But lately, she found herself wanting something…more.
She blamed it on her best friend Megan. Megan had gotten married two months ago, though not to her original groom. Their story was the kind of gushy, too-cute-to-be-true, fairy-tale romance that wasn’t supposed to happen in real life. But for Megan, the impossible had happened. The weekend of her wedding, she’d boarded a plane home to tell her parents that she and her cheating asshole fiancé had broken up. After imbibing several drinks and a large dose of Dramamine on the plane, she passed out and was carried off-board by her gorgeous seatmate, who filled in as her substitute fiancé. By the end of the week, Josh had become her real husband and the two were still nauseatingly happy.
Gag.
Still, Blair couldn’t dismiss that their wild and crazy love had put a crack in her belief that she had the perfect arrangement—a crack that was starting to spider web. She and Neil had separate apartments, and although Neil had begun spending more time at her place, he remained surprisingly stubborn about keeping his after they were married.
A memory from a couple of months ago intruded on her, tapping directly on that crack in the glass.
“My apartment is closer to the hospital, Blair,” Neil had said matter-of-factly, sipping his morning coffee. “It will be easier for the nights I’m on call.”
It was hard to argue with his logic—and his stoic logic had always been one of his more attractive traits—but it still seemed…wrong. If they were unifying their lives in other ways, why keep separate places? And she knew how it would seem to everyone else.
“But the money—”
“The mortgage on my condo is more than covered by my salary, and the neighborhood is up-and-coming,” he had said, his eyes still glued on his newspaper. “If I hold onto it for another five years, there’s a chance it will double in value. It makes financial sense to keep it.”
At the time, she’d wanted to point out that he could rent it, and anyway, her condo was only twenty minutes from the hospital. He’d already vehemently nixed the idea of sharing his place. According to Neil, the loft was a bachelor pad, and they needed to have a home worthy of entertaining their friends and family. Not that they were known for their dinner parties.
But pointing out those facts would only have instigated an argument. And one of the best parts of their relationship was that they rarely argued. Her job was taxing and full of dissent; when she came home, she coveted peace. And if she were truly honest with herself, a small part of her approved of the living arrangements. Now that he was staying at her apartment on a more consistent basis, she’d begun to find his presence surprisingly suffocating and his previously cute quirks—like the precise way he chewed his food or how he had to have the remote control positioned a very exact way on the coffee table—irritating as hell. But that was normal. As a divorce attorney, she knew better than to expect marriage would be a roller coaster of excitement.
In fact, if she’d learned anything from her work, it was this: the couples who ended up divorcing after just a year or two were usually the ones who’d been head-over-heels, drawing-hearts-on-everything in love when they approached the altar. Megan’s delirious happiness aside, there was no such thing as true love.
If there were, she would still be with Garrett Lowry.
She clanked her now empty glass on the bar to get the bartender’s attention. “Another, please.”
He shot her a grin as he poured her drink. “Must have been some kind of Monday.”
She grabbed the glass out of his hands. “You have no idea.”
The deposition had run nearly two hours longer than planned, and she’d barely made it to LAX in time to catch her plane. Her feeling of relief had been short lived; the severe turbulence had convinced her and most of the other passengers they were about to meet their maker. By the time they landed in Phoenix, many of the connecting flights had been cancelled or delayed, and Blair discovered she was stuck overnight in Arizona. The airline had sent her to this hotel, but there had been a problem at the check-in desk.
Half her whiskey was gone before she realized it. There were so many things she needed to do in Kansas City, and she wouldn’t get back until at least mid-morning, which meant she’d have to rush to get to her morning deposition. To make matters worse, the damn airline hadn’t even confirmed her on the six a.m. flight. They’d only made a vague promise to text her around four in the morning to confirm if she had a ticket.
So now she was well on her way to getting drunk in the bar of an Embassy Suites, playing another round of This is Your Life, Blair Anne Myers Hansen, and she wasn’t too happy with what she saw.
Practical, pragmatic, sensible Blair wanted a heart stopping, butterflies-in-her-stomach kind of love.
All that turbulence must have rattled her brains.
But she couldn’t deny the fact that she’d been thinking of Garrett a lot over the last two months—much more than the asshole deserved. Truth be told, he was the only man she’d ever loved. And look how that had turned out. Five years later, she could finally admit to the role she’d played in their break-up, but that didn’t make it suck any less.
The rift had formed the night Blair received word of her estranged father’s death. Rather than share the news with Garrett when he came over, she lashed out at him, picking a fight over some nitpicky complaint. Anger had always been her go-to reaction, and Garrett had weathered many a storm, but that night he’d responded with a fire equal to her own. The fight spiraled out of control, and before she realized what was happening, Garrett was packing the toiletries and clothes he kept at her apartment into a duffel bag. And then he was gone.
She spent the next day drowning in an emotional fog of dismay, grief, and loss, even skipping classes—something she never did. After hours of stewing in her turbulent emotions, she realized she felt an intense ache for Garrett. For the first time ever, she truly needed someone. She decided to swallow her pride and go to him, ready to beg for his forgiveness and ask him to go with her to her father’s funeral. Never in a million years would she have guessed the surprise she found in his apartment.
Jody Stewart, a fellow second-year law student who’d made no secret of her lust for Garret, opened his door wearing cheap superstore lingerie. Neon green, to make matters worse.
Blair turned around and didn’t look back, not even when Garrett ran after her. Or when he pounded on her apartment door for an hour begging and pleading with her to let him explain. Not even when he tried to approach her in class every day for two solid weeks.
When he began to single-handedly plow his way through nearly every available woman in law school the next year, not to mention a couple of not-so-available ones, she knew she’d made the right decision.
Garrett Lowry was a player.
He may have taken a momentary side-stop with her, but he’d wasted no time before jumping back into the game. She was better off without him.
Still, the memories chafed.
Between Garrett’s betrayal and her father’s bad behavior, it had been easy for Blair to decide what type of law to practice. In fact, she should thank them both. Maybe she’d take daisies to her father’s grave when she came back from her honeymoon. He’d always hated daisies.
She was motioning to the bartender to bring her another drink, wishing the hotel staff would finally give her a damn room key, when she noticed him—a man was standing in the entrance of the bar, his gaze fixed on her. She did a double take, certain the Embassy Suites was now including hallucinogens in their drinks, because standing in the doorway was the player himself—Garrett Lowry.
She stopped the bartender as he grabbed her glass. “I’m going to need you to make that a double.”
Chapter Two
Garrett Lowry wondered if he should just divorce his family and be done with them. Unfortunately, while he’d seen quite a few unusual divorce cases in his four years of practicing law, he’d never seen anyone divorce his mother and aunt.
All this fuss over a damned one-third-carat diamond ring.
There was no dispute that his great-grandma Marie had bequeathed her engagement ring to her granddaughter. The trouble was that she hadn’t specified which granddaughter. Garrett’s Aunt Debra claimed that possession was nine-tenths of the law, and since she had possession of the ring, it was, ipso facto, hers…or rather her son’s. She had given it to her son for his fiancé six months ago. Garrett’s mother felt otherwise, and so the colossal argument had begun. Though he had no real desire to contest his aunt’s stance on the issue, Garrett could think of half a dozen legal cases that disputed her claim. But even if he’d felt any familial connection to the round rock on the gold band, surrounded by multiple smaller diamonds, he had no present use for it. He hadn’t had a steady girlfriend since law school, when—in a moment of profound idiocy—he’d broken up with the one woman he’d ever loved.
Ever since, he had hopping from one fling to the next like a water droplets on a hot skillet. It had been fun at first, but over the last year—with the big three-o on the horizon—Garrett had changed. He was ready to settle down with someone, but none of his relationships seemed to last longer than a couple of months.
The problem was simple, the solution less so: No one could live up to his ex-girlfriend, Blair Myers. They’d shared a connection the likes of which he’d never found with anyone else, and he was becoming increasingly convinced that he wouldn’t find it with anyone else.
Garrett had to admit that it rubbed like hell that his cousin was getting married. The guy had to be the most boring person on the planet, not to mention the most annoying. Garrett assured himself that his bride-to-be was surely some milquetoast woman who was eager to settle with Dr. Neil Fredrick in their suburban house with two-point-five kids. He’d come home from the hospital talking about which bacteria had given someone the squirts and his wife would serve up pot roast and boiled potatoes.
But that didn’t make him any more eager to take part in the War of the Ring, which had reached a boiling point now that the wedding was only a week away. Too bad Nana Ruby, the family matriarch, had taken it upon herself to assign him the role of peacemaker. Without bothering to consult him first, she’d arranged for him to be a last-minute groomsman in the wedding. He hadn’t even planned on going—he’d tossed the ivory invitation into the trash the moment it arrived, knowing he’d only received one was at Nana Ruby’s behest—and he had plenty of work to do in San Diego. But Nana didn’t want excuses; she wanted to know that he would show up in Kansas City with a smile on his face and keep the peace.
And no one said no to Nana.
“I’m leaving the success or failure of this wedding in your hands, Garrett Michael Lowry,” the older woman had barked into the phone.
Garrett had snickered in response. “That seems like a huge responsibility, Nana. Are you sure you want to leave that to me? In case you’ve forgotten, I’m more of an instigator then a peacemaker.”
“Ain’t your high falutin’ job all about making people come to some kind of agreement? You should be doin’ the same for your family.” Nana Ruby made no secret that she didn’t take much stock in higher education. Born and raised in the Ozarks, she’d gotten an ninth grade education and a doctorate in the university of hard knocks, a school she claimed was more beneficial than all those hoity-toity colleges. Garrett had always appreciated Nana’s unique charm, so he let her insults roll of his back. Neil, on the other hand, not so much.
“I don’t always help them come to an agreement, Nana. Sometimes the judge has to lay down the law.” He had paused for a moment before chuckling again. “Kind of like you, when it comes to Mom and Aunt Debra.”
“Don’t you try sweet talkin’ me, you devil child,” she’d grumbled.
“Sweet talk you? I’d be a fool to try. You’d rather have a cup of vinegar than a pot full of sugar.”
“You’re damn straight. Now get your ass to Kansas City, and you better have things under control by the time I drive up there on Wednesday.”
Garrett had hoped his mother would give him an out. He was her golden child, particularly after his sister’s recent out-of-wedlock pregnancy. Never mind that Kelsey was thirty-one years old and an executive sales manager for a national cellular phone service, making a six-figure income. In his mother’s eyes—or more importantly his Aunt Debra’s—Kelsey had tarnished the Lowry side of the family. Frankly, Garrett thought Kelsey had dodged a bullet by not marrying her on-again, off-again boyfriend, who seemed incapable of holding a steady job. But all either sister cared about was whether Kelsey’s loser ex had put a ring on it.
While Garrett found it irritating that his mother would let his backwoods aunt’s attitude sway her, he was opportunistic enough to take advantage of his mother’s current desire to keep him happy.
Of course, she’d denied him, insisting his inclusion in the wedding would be good for family unity.
“How will it be good for family unity? It’s only going to stir up more shit.”
“Language, Garrett,” she’d chastised. “You know your aunt can’t abide cursing.”
“See? All the more reason for me to stay away and not upset the carefully constructed apple cart.”
“If your nana wants you to be there, who are we to question it? She knows what she’s doing,” was all his mother would say.
His mother was up to something, all right, and it sure as hell wouldn’t help him play peace keeper.
The only bright spot was that Neil was probably even more irritated about Garrett’s inclusion in the wedding party than he was.
Perhaps their mothers’ habitual animosity added fuel to the fire, but the cousins had never gotten along. While Garrett had always loved the two weeks a year he spent on his widowed grandmother’s acreage, spending it with Neil had added a partial dark cloud. Nana had taught both boys about the farm—from livestock to gardening—and while Garrett had soaked up the knowledge, reveling in it, Neil had whined so much, Nana had finally agreed to let him stay in the house with a book while she made the farm rounds with Garrett. But the annual visits had stopped in high school—which might have also coincided with Garrett playing a practical joke on his cousin involving horse dung—and while Garrett didn’t miss his mealy mouth cousin, he did miss his one-on-one time with Nana. So, while he technically could have told Nana Ruby no, he respected her so much, he would have done anything she asked of him. Not the he’d ever admit it. So he’d gone to work on Monday, told the senior partners he had a family emergency, and bought a late afternoon ticket to Kansas City.
Too bad Garrett spilled the slightly amusing, slightly sad tale of what the emergency actually was, because as soon as he did, his boss decided to use it to his advantage.
Earlier that afternoon, Garrett had been packing his messenger bag when his boss walked into his office looking like he’d won the lottery.
“Since your emergency isn’t so emergent, you can do some work while you’re there.”
Garrett patted his bag. “That’s what I’m planning to do, Matt.”
Matt shook his head, his grin so wide it was wonder his face didn’t split open. “Nope. Congratulations. You get to take the depositions on the Norfolk case.”
Garrett’s mouth dropped open. Could this trip get any worse? He shook his head in dismay. “No. Anything but that.”
His boss only laughed and dropped a huge file on Garrett’s desk. “Look at this way. Now you don’t have to take vacation time.”
“I’ll take the week off without pay to get out of this.”
“Too late. It’s already been decided by the big guy upstairs.” He pointed his finger toward the ceiling. “He figures you’ll do a better job than Lopez has done. The client’s lost confidence in him, and you have a reputation of being a barracuda, so…”
Garrett groaned and picked up the file, flipping through the pages. “Dammit. I hear the attorney representing the wife is a real bitch.”
Matt laughed. “You don’t know the half of it.” He looked over his shoulder at the door, then turned back to Garrett and lowered his voice. “Rumor has it she made Lopez cry.”
Garrett started to laugh before realizing he was the one who had to fill Lopez’s shoes.
“Lopez’s assistant will email you more details about the case, but the file should be enough to get you up to speed. Your first deposition is tomorrow at ten and should get the week rolling.”
“First deposition?”
He boss laughed. “There are multiple people to depose in this case. The wife. The husband. The girlfriends. Plural.”
“I’m flying home on Sunday, Matt. And I supposedly have wedding activities on Thursday and Friday.”
Matt headed for the door and called over his shoulder. “Don’t come back until they’re all done.”
The wedding itself had begun to look like a cakewalk.
But now he was grounded in Phoenix for the night, and while he didn’t regret missing an early start to the wedding festivities, he didn’t want to delay the depositions. He had no desire to stay in Kansas City a minute longer than necessary, and he was pretty sure Nana wouldn’t see work as an excuse to get out of forced family fun.
But all thoughts went out the window when he ventured down to the bar at the hotel he’d booked. Because he recognized the woman sitting at the bar.
It was her, the woman who’d ruined all other women for him.
Blair Myers.
He blinked, certain his mind had given up and induced some type of psychosis, but the look of recognition in her own eyes proved she was real.
She was more beautiful than he remembered her. She still wore her blonde hair long, and it hung loose, though slightly mussed—totally unlike the put together woman with whom he’d spent nearly a year. She wore a black skirt and a light gray silk blouse that clung to her breasts. Her four-inch black heels rested on the metal footrest attached to the bar. Her clear blue eyes were focused on him.
It took him a full three seconds to come to his senses and another couple to figure out what to do. Did he ignore her? Did he say hello? He knew what he wanted to do, but what did she want?
In the end, his feet made the decision for him. He found himself moving toward her and he stopped only a few feet away, his pulse pounding in his head. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d been this nervous, and from the way she was clutching the tumbler the bartender had just handed her, so was she.
What did he say? A half a dozen things popped into his head. I miss you. You look good. Are you happy? There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t regret what I did. But the only thing that came out of his mouth was “Hi.”
She continued to stare at him, her gaze slightly unfocused.
“Can I sit?” he motioned to the stool next to her.
His question snapped her out of her daze. She gave him a half shrug, then turned to face the bar. “I can’t stop you.”
He took the fact that she hadn’t kneed him in the balls as a good sign. He slid onto the leather stool as she leaned her elbows on the counter, swaying slightly. No one else would ever notice, but he’d spent the better part of a year studying her instead of his law books. The Blair he knew didn’t get drunk. “What are you doing in Phoenix?”
“Passing through.” She took a sip of her drink.
He was going to need fortitude. He flagged down the bartender. “I’ll take a draft beer. You got Coors?”
The bartender nodded and went to get his drink. Blair chuckled, but it was a brittle sound. “You still drink that crap?”
“Crap?” He leaned his forearms on the bar. “It’s made from pure mountain spring water.”
She laughed, a genuine laugh, and something in his chest seized with a longing that caught him by surprise. He’d missed her, but the ache was even stronger now that she was beside him.
She turned to him, her gaze searching his face. “Are you married?”
He couldn’t believe he was sitting with her now. Maybe this was the universe giving him a gift he didn’t deserve, or maybe it was some uniquely horrible form of torture. Either way, he’d take it, but he had to tread lightly. He wanted to tell her what an idiot he’d been, but he needed to take this slow or he would scare her off. Every moment he had with her was a gift and he wasn’t about to screw that up. He forced a chuckle. “Hell, no.” He instantly knew it was a mistake.
“Still foot loose and fancy free, huh?” She waved her glass to accentuate her words.
The bartender handed him his beer and he grinned. “Since when did you start saying things like foot loose and fancy free?”
“Since I drank three whiskeys, two of them doubles.” She lifted her glass in salute and took a sip. “And you didn’t answer my question.”
He smirked, even if his heart wasn’t in it. “You bet I am. You?” He glanced down at her left hand and his heart sank.
She held up her hand, the better to blind him, flashing a gold ring with multiple diamonds.
He swallowed his disappointment and for a moment he actually considered getting up and walking away. He wasn’t sure he could sit here and pretend to be happy for her, that his mind hadn’t spun into overdrive with excitement and possibilities the moment he saw her, but he wasn’t sure he could live with himself if he acted that way. After all, he was the one who’d left and hurt her all those years ago. He owed her more than that. “Really, Blair? You don’t seem like the marrying kind.”
“People surprise you.” She grinned, but there was a bitter note in her voice.
He wanted to apologize, every fiber of his being demanded that he apologize, but he couldn’t. Despite what she thought, he knew her. The second he apologized she’d kick his ass—probably physically as well as verbally—and walk away forever. Blair couldn’t stomach any sign of weakness, especially in herself. If he let this conversation get even borderline sappy, it was done.
“So tell me about the poor fool you ended up with.” He forced a grin.
She lifted her eyebrows. “Why? So you can make fun of him?”
“Depends. You know me. I make fun of anyone who believes in the Hallmark version of love.”
She laughed. “We both did.”
Yet she’d loved him once. And even though neither of them were sappy, what Garrett and Blair shared had been intense yet fun.
“Remember Anti-Valentines’ Day?” she asked, laughing as she watched him.
His breath caught in his throat. Her face was less than two feet away, and he had a powerful urge to lean over and kiss her, but that would ruin everything. He pulled himself together.
“How could I forget Anti-Valentine’s Day?” They’d gone out of their way to do the exact opposite of a typical Valentine’s Day celebration, opting for Chuck E. Cheese and arcade games and crappy pizza rather than roses and wine. Then Garrett led her to the roof of his third floor apartment building, where he’d set up a telescope, and showed her the star he’d bought for her and named Blazing Supernova. When she argued that the speck of dust he’d bought her wasn’t a supernova, he told her she burned brighter than any star in the sky, though of course he teased her too, so it wouldn’t come across as sentimental. And he gave her a plastic ring he’d won at Chuck E. Cheese, telling her that someday he’d give her a real ring, but it would be on October 14, because it was the farthest a person could get from Valentine’s Day.
Two months later he had ruined everything.
“Remember when we made fun of those idiots who were fighting over the last batch of roses at the grocery store?” she laughed, then finished her drink and motioned to the bartender.
Blair was a social drinker. She only got shit-faced when she was upset. Now he was worried about her. “So does your guy buy you flowers?”
“Hell, no,” she scoffed, wobbling on her stool. “He’s too practical for that.”
“So what does he do?”
Her eyebrows lowered and she spent several seconds deep in thought. To his alarm, tears filled her eyes. “He programed my remote.”
He shook his head in mock appreciation. “An admirable gift.”
Her attention drifted over his shoulder and he turned to see a hotel employee walking toward them.
“I’m sorry, ma’am.” The skittish woman looked like she was about to bolt. “There aren’t any rooms available here at the hotel or any other hotel in a twenty mile radius. We checked.” She cringed. “Twice.”
Blair blinked and her eyes struggled to focus on the woman. “There are no rooms anywhere?” The sentence ended in a shout.
The employee jumped. “No, ma’am. I’m sorry.”
“Ma’am?” Blair jumped off her stool and nearly fell over as she pointed her finger at the poor woman. “I’m not a ma’am! I could sue you for that!”
Garrett slid off his stool and wrapped his arm around her waist, pulling her back to his stomach. “Whoa, down there, tiger.”
She looked over her shoulder up at him, horror in her eyes. “She called me ma’am. How could she do that?”
Garrett gave her a sympathetic look. “Clearly the poor woman needs glasses, but I hardly think it’s worth suing over.”
Blair twisted in his arms until her chest was pressed against his and she looked up at him. “There’s no room for me in the inn, Garrett.”
The seriousness on her face made him chuckle. “I’ll find you a stable somewhere, Blazer. Not to worry.” His old nickname for her slipped out before he could reel it back in, but thankfully she didn’t seem to notice.
“I hate horses,” she grumbled, resting her cheek on his chest.
“I know. I’ll make sure there aren’t any horses.”
The poor employee watched them in confusion, then lifted her gaze to Garrett. He winked. “She was joking about suing.”
“No I wasn’t,” Blair mumbled.
The employee’s eyes widened and Garrett mouthed run.
The woman took off and Garrett helped Blair back onto her stool. The bartender returned with Blair’s drink, but Garrett pushed it away before she could see it. “Can you bring a couple of waters and a couple of cheeseburgers, one with extra pickles?”
Blair laid her head down on the bar. “I like pickles.”
“I know.” He was glad she was too drunk to hear the sorrow in his voice.
Her head jerked up and her eyes widened. “I have to find somewhere to stay tonight.”
“Blair, I’ve already figured it out. Let’s eat and then we’ll talk about it.”
She laid her head down on her arm. “Okay.”
He watched her for several seconds, wondering what had made her so upset. He’d only seen her this drunk once before—the night she’d learned that her mother was moving from Kansas City to Des Moines. He had been her anchor then.
Now she was a mess and she had literally nowhere to go. He wasn’t about to leave her here. He could spend the rest of his life beating himself over something that was already done or he could try to make things right. And other than Blair, Garrett wasn’t a man to live in the past and dwell on mistakes. Now was the time to act.
He asked the bartender to have the food sent to his room, and then he helped Blair off her stool. “Come on, Blazer. They found you a room.”
She lifted her head slightly. “They did?”
“Yeah, your attorney skills must be up to notch. All that talk about suing convinced them to find you one.” He reached for her. “Let me help you find it.”
She sat up and fumbled as she batted his hands away. “I don’t need any help. Especially not from you.”
He lifted his hands in surrender. “Of course you don’t. But they asked me to escort you. So there’s no further lawsuit-worthy issues.”
Her nose scrunched. She was clearly confused, but drunk enough to believe him. She slid off the stool and reached for her overnight bag, nearly tripping when she tugged it off the ground.
He grabbed the bag and slung her purse over his shoulder too.
She shook her head and nearly fell over. “I don’t think that bag goes with your outfit.”
He grabbed her elbow to steady her. The bag was made of off-white, uber-shiny patent leather with a shiny gold clasp. It had probably cost a fortune. When he compared it to his jeans and pale blue button-up shirt, covered in red stains from the Bloody Mary the passenger next to him had spilled during the turbulence, he flashed her a cocky grin. “Really? I thought jeans went with everything.”
She looked up into his face, her eyes searching his. “Why do you still have to be funny? And cute?” She slapped his chest, then left her hand there.
“Why aren’t you fat and bald?”
“Because, Blair Myers, as you and I both know, there’s really no such thing as justice in this world.” He kept his tone light and teasing, although perhaps this chance meeting proved there was justice in the world. He deserved every bit of pain it brought him. That seemed like justice to him.
She lifted her chin. “I’m not sleeping with you.”
“I never asked.”
She jerked out of his hold and put her hands on her hips. “I’m not good enough for the high and mighty Garrett Lowry?”
“You know me, Blazer. Never to go to the same pasture twice.” She’d accused him of that once, right before they left law school. It had stung deeper than he’d let on.
“I’m the best lay you ever had, Lowry.”
“It’s been too long and too many pastures ago to say, Blazer, but I’m sure you make the top five.” He knew she was beyond drunk when she had no reply. “Come on, the hotel staff asked me to show you to your room.”
He reached for her arm again, grateful when she didn’t shrug him off. He led her to the elevator, slightly worried the hotel staff would think he was taking advantage of her inebriation. But Blair’s drunken threats seemed to have staved off any such worries. Once they got on the elevator, his thankfulness turned to anger. Anyone could have take advantage of her. But he knew that wasn’t true. Blair Myers was nobody’s fool, drunk or not. The fact that she trusted him now told him that she still cared about him. At least on some level.
When they reached his room, he pulled out his key and opened the door, leading her inside.
“There’s already a suitcase in here,” she said as she wobbled across the room. She kicked off her heels mid-stride.
“It’s mine,” he said, watching her. “They brought it up here when they asked me to show you to your room.” It was utter nonsense, but she was drunk enough to buy it. If he let on that the room had originally been his, there was no way she would stay in it, drunk or not.
“Oh.” She sat down on the edge of the bed. “I’m still not sleeping with you.” She waved her left hand, the diamonds in her ring catching the light. “I’m not a cheater.”
He leaned his ass against the dresser. “I never cheated on you, Blair.”
She tilted her head to look at him. “No, I’ll give you that. I guess you’d left me before you slept with her.” He knew who she was talking about, of course. He hadn’t slept with her, but this wasn’t the time for an explanation. Blair glanced at his suitcase, then back at him. “You don’t live in Phoenix?”
“Nope. Looks like we both got stranded here.”
“So where are you going to sleep?”
He shrugged. He hadn’t gotten that far in this crazy scheme. “After I know you’re settled, I can go back to the airport.”
She fumbled with the buttons on her blouse, leaving it gaping open so that that he could she the swell of her breasts in her black bra and the creamy flesh of her abdomen.
God help him, but he was getting turned on by a drunk woman.
But this wasn’t just any drunk woman. This was Blair. Blair. How many nights had he thought of her naked body, the feel of her beneath him as he filled her… But it didn’t matter what his body—or his mind—remembered. He wasn’t about to try anything with her. He respected her more than that.
She settled back onto the bed, her legs curled to the side, and stared up at the ceiling. “You can’t go to the airport.” She licked her bottom lip and then sighed. “You can stay here.”
“It’s your room, Blazer. Besides, you already said you weren’t going to have sex with me.”
She awkwardly reached over and patted the other side of the mattress. “It’s a big bed and I’m a used pasture. You can sleep over there.”
He wanted to stay with her, but based on the way he couldn’t take his eyes off the curve of her hips in her skirt or her exposed cleavage, he wasn’t sure it was a good idea. “That is a very generous offer, but maybe I should head out now that you’re settled.” He could always grab some food at the airport. God knew, she could probably use both burgers after all the whiskey she’d downed.
She sat up and tears filled her eyes. “You’re leaving me again.”
Something in her voice ripped his heart to shreds. He’d sooner set himself on fire than make her feel that way again.
“No, Blair,” he said softly. “I’m not leaving you.” He moved to the bed and sat down next to her, wrapping his arm around her back and pulling her close. “Are you hungry?”
“Yeah.” But her eyes sunk closed.
They sat there for five minutes, Blair dozing against him as he cradled her to his chest. He closed his eyes and drank her in—the sight of her, the smell of her, the familiarity of her. The scab on his heart ripped open, leaving him bruised and raw. She only wore an engagement ring. That meant she probably wasn’t married yet. Maybe in the morning when she was sober, they could talk and he could tell her everything—that he was an utter idiot, but he was miserable without her, and he’d do anything to win her back. Literally anything.
Maybe there was hope for them.
Room service knocked on the door, and he gently settled her back onto the bed before he signed for the food. He considered waking her to eat, but she looked so peaceful he couldn’t disturb her. He ate his burger while he checked his email and studied for his deposition in the morning, all the while sneaking glances at her. Watching her was surreal. He’d never expected to see her again, let alone have her on his bed. Of course, he’d prefer to have her doing other things in his bed, but the peace and happiness he felt in her mere presence was a telling sign of how he felt.
Soon her draw was too strong. He changed into a T-shirt and a pair of athletic shorts and carefully lay down on the bed next to her, both of them on top of the comforter. She stirred and he studied her face, taking in every detail and committing it to memory in case she refused to listen to him, which, he realized, was the most likely scenario. Blair was firmly against second chances. The way she’d turned her back on her father was proof enough of that.
She sighed and rolled over again, pressing her back to his stomach. He held his breath, waiting for her to wake up and accuse him of trying to take advantage of her. But she soon stilled, pulling his arm tighter against her stomach. He breathed in her scent, drowning in memories. She still used the same vanilla-scented shampoo.
“I miss you, Garrett,” she mumbled and he froze. If she hadn’t said his name, he would have thought she was talking about her fiancé/husband. But she had said his name.
So he wasn’t the only one who still had feelings.
He could make this work. He’d figure out a way. Screw Neil’s damn wedding. Screw the Norfolk depositions. He’d stay here with her as long as it took to convince her to give him a second chance.
But when he woke the next morning, the room still dark, and he was devastated to find her side of the bed empty.
Blair was gone.
*****
Read the rest on June 2!
May 1, 2015
Rose Gardner Mystery Series– How Many More Books?
After every Rose Gardner book release, I always get asked “how many more books?” Some want to know because they never want the series to end. Others ask because they want to know how many books they are committed to. I also get a lot of statements, comments about things in general I thought might be helpful to address.
1) When will the Rose Gardner Mystery series end?
All the bigger threads in the series will be wrapped up by the end of Thirty-Six and a Half ??, which should release in early 2016. I could end the series there if I choose to. Will I? Probably not. I love Rose, but a lot of it depends on if readers are still interested in the series. I have some ideas about what will happen in subsequent books, so the series could and most likely will continue.
Readers who want to end the series will get enough of a resolution at the end of Thirty-Six to stop reading.
So for readers who want a conclusion, there you go. And for those of you who don’t, don’t worry.
2) But two books ago you said there were only to more books before you ended the series.
I have never given an end date for this series. In the past, I have said things like “at least two more books, then we’ll see.” Part of it was me trying to figure out the best way to tie up the loose threads and give the readers a very full, rich reading experience. As I started writing Thirty-Four and a Half Predicaments, I figured out how to resolve it all by the end of Thirty-Six.
3) Why are your books getting shorter?
While the novellas are shorter–between 31,000 words and Ripple of Secrets ending at 39,000, the novels are getting longer.
My first Rose book, Twenty-Eight and a Half Wishes is around 94,000 words. Thirty-Three and a Half Shenanigans wrapped up around 105,000 word and Thirty-Four and a Half Predicaments ended with 101,00.
I try to write the novellas as enhanced reading for the series and not absolutely necessary. But many readers love reading the supporting characters stories through their eyes. The past three novellas (excluding Rose and Helena Save Christmas) have been offered free to newsletter subscribers on my website before I released them for sale.
4) Will there be a novella between Thirty-Four and a Half Predicaments and Thirty-Five and a Half Conspiracies?
I am not currently planning a novella. I expect Thirty-Five to begin a day or so after the end of Thirty-Four.
5) Your book is incomplete. It’s half a book.
The series is the Rose Gardner Mystery series. With the exception of the novellas, every Rose novel has a mystery that is solved by the end of the book. The personal issues of the characters are not resolved in each book. They carry over from book to book. Thirty-Four and a Half Predicaments has a mystery. What happened to Rose’s mother, Dora Middleton, was completely resolved in this book. Yes, there is a cliffhanger, but it is a setup for the next book.
6) I’m unhappy with your book. I’m done reading the series.
Here’s the sad truth that has been very hard for me to accept: I will never make everyone happy. It’s absolutely impossible. My job is to write the story of my heart, and hope I make the majority of my readers happy. The Rose Gardner Mysteries are now seven books into the series. Your trust in me is no small thing. Believe me, it weighs heavy on my mind when I write my books. But if I have lost your trust, by all means, I encourage you to stop reading.
