R. Haven's Blog, page 2

Stretch Goals; September 17 2025

Since high school, I’ve thought of myself as a fairly political person. Being in a university politics course has proven to me that I was right on the mark about that, but also underscored how much more there is to know about politics in general.

On the flipside, my course on social justice is frightening in how much of it I’d been taking for granted as common sense. Thinking back, if I’d been introduced to these concepts right out of high school, I probably would have been shocked by a lot of it. But nowadays, it all seems horribly obvious… Which makes it all the more disgusting that alt-right conservatives don’t seem to get it.

It’s good but it’s exhausting.

I’ve also been whittling away at my latest manuscript, which I’m disappointed to say will probably wind up being a novella rather than a full-length novel. I’m a firm believer that a well-written book is exactly as long as it needs to be, so if that means it’s on the shorter side, so be it…

But it’s also hard to sell novellas. It shouldn’t be ‘all about the money’, but when you live in poverty, everything’s about the money, truly.

If you want to help out and haven’t already bought my book, you can check out the purchasing options for The Other Face of Sympathy here! Alternatively, there’s always my ko-fi page, where every bit helps me with essentials. I’m focused on essentials only, as of late. I miss having a goal I’m saving up towards, but that’s not doable right now.

I love y’all. I hope this world starts treating us all better.

The Other Face of Sympathy; September 10 2025

September has been a ride, and it hasn’t slowed down yet! My BOOK is out! My schooling’s started! I’m working hard to get a first draft of my latest work-in-progress written! I have an appointment for later this month to resume counselling!

It’s a lot. It’s a lot of a lot. I so hope y’all have looked into The Other Face of Sympathy because there’s not much more I think I can do to promote it!

The three courses I have for this semester are politics, sociology, and a look at marginalization through the lens of social work. Of all of them, the last one resonates with my book the most. It was funny, sitting there and listening to the very jazzed professor explain what the course is about and going ‘this is what The Other Face of Sympathy is. This is what it’s all about.’

It's just wild to me, and very telling. I really think this is where I belong.

Anyway, back on book-topic – I wanted to ask those of y’all who have read it to consider reviewing it (honestly!) on Goodreads, TheStorygraph, and Amazon! If you bought the book at Barnes & Noble or Indigo, reviewing it there also helps a ton!

Hoping your month is a bit calmer than mine!

Read and Review; September 3 2025

September is off to a truly wild start, with everyone around me facing crises that I can’t be of much help with. I want to hope the rest of the month will be calmer, like things are just getting out of the way early, but since I’m starting school tomorrow and have 2/3rd of a book to write…

Yeah, I’m not expecting miracles!

What I am expecting with great excitement is for more of The Other Face of Sympathy to become available next week, as September 9th rolls around – my official publication date! Some people got their preordered copies already.

I’m a tad terrified. Like, on a logical level, I knew that publishing my book meant people were going to read it… But now my friends are reading it and that’s a weird type of anxiety-inducing. I just hope they don’t hate it!

If you wind up reading it (or are going to) I’d encourage you to leave reviews on the book’s Goodreads, Storygraph, and Amazon pages. Reviews are the best way to connect the book to more readers!

I hope everyone else is having a calmer start to September!

Two Weeks to Go; August 27 2025

Two weeks from now, The Other Face of Sympathy will officially be out in the world. It’s blowing my mind a bit!

I’ll also be officially back in university, which is also blowing my mind but in a slightly more terrified way. I went to the campus in advance just so I’d have an idea of where my classes were, and it’s all… pretty dizzying. I feel out of place, old, and disoriented. I’m still not totally sure where all my classes are, because certain buildings were locked.

I’ll just get there early and hope for the best. That’s usually how I deal with stressful scenarios.

If you want to help reduce my stress, you can preorder my book (if you haven’t already) – preorder numbers are a huge indicator in the publishing industry whether or not they can consider an author ‘a success’, so it means a lot when you do so!

Reminder as well that if you’re in Canada (specifically Ontario) you can potentially come see me at Can*Con this October! A bookish convention celebrating Canadian literature with panels, signings, and other fun stuff!

Wish me luck, y’all!

I Wish Ill; August 20 2025

Falling out of love with something hurts. Rowling has soured such a large chunk of my childhood with her hate speech, her financial support for anti-trans legislation, that I can barely look at anything ‘Harry Potter’-coded without wincing.

So you can probably imagine that I’m not thrilled when I say, my child’s been introduced to Harry Potter.

She proudly tells me that she’s a Ravenclaw or a Hufflepuff. She’s asked me repeatedly what House I’m in. She gets excited when she sees HP merchandise and only accepts that I won’t buy them when I remember we can like a Thing, but still not support the Creator. Her aunt’s been reading her the books. She’s disappointed that I donated my old copies, because she understands that we won’t be buying new ones.

I guess I’ll have to look for second-hand copies, but I’m uncomfortable even looking for them. I don’t know how to describe how honestly and brutally upsetting I find this.

Harry Potter cannot be separated from J.K. Rowling. Which means some of the best memories from my childhood feel dirty, now. It feels like fondly remembering playing with your friends only to realize that, in hindsight, you were being snidely bullied by people who hated you.

I’m sad.

And tired.

And I do wish ill on J.K. Rowling, for all that she’s done. For all the lives she’s actively trying to ruin. For every trans person who died too soon and all the ones who will.

And all the people like me, who didn’t figure out until way too late that we were the butt of her cruelest joke all along.

Down For the Count; August 13 2025

So I don’t know whether or not a book launch party will be happening, because I can’t seem to get through to the potential venue! It’s a shame if I can’t, but hopefully that won’t diminish the hype for those who’ve preordered it already!

I’ve been having a couple of really rough pain days. I could barely move Monday night, after taking my kid to the pool during the day. It was my first time going out shirtless in a public place.

It was a nerve-wracking thing, to be honest. But it went well!

The resulting pain aside, I mean.

I think a good chunk of my exhaustion is due to my bones being on fire, but I’m also all wound up (sensibility be damned) about my book release. I really want to do everything in my power to make it a success, but that power is basically nonexistent.

What would y’all do to help market a book you wrote? Tell me about it in a comment!

High Spirits; August 6 2025

If you happen to be visiting Niagara, Ontario, I’ve got to recommend the ghost tour at Fort George. I went with my friends over the weekend and had a fantastic time – what an experience!

Also, if you missed it, I posted on Friday about an anthology I have the honour to be included in! Choices: An Anthology of Reproductive Horror comes out on September 30th this year, so be sure to check that out as well. You can also read the blurb on the page of my works.

I’m getting pretty hype (and nervous) for September, all around. My book comes out, my university classes start. I should be allowed certain accommodations that allow me to attend virtually, so I’d be okay in that regard, but it’s still going to be an adjustment. I’m hoping to organize a book launch event in Toronto as well – keep an eye out for any news about that!

It's gonna be busy. But, it should also be very good.

Choices Anthology; Aug 1 2025

What’s this? A blog post on a Friday?

I’m doing an extra one this week to announce that a story of mine, ‘A Dead Woman’s Journal’, is being released in an anthology this September!

Choices: An Anthology of Reproductive Horror releases on September 30th and ebook preorders are open right now! Print preorders will become available closer to the release date!

As the horrors close in around us, we turn to story to process our fears, our desires, and our futures. In Choices: An Anthology of Reproductive Fiction, nineteen writers whose reproductive rights are under threat explore the stories of those who, like them, have had their choices stolen from them:

The horror of being forced to carry a child you don’t want.

The catharsis of taking revenge on a man who stole your right to choose.

The tragedy of being threatened by the world for having a baby you do want because you’re “the wrong gender”.

The pride of knowing you fought for a better future, even if that future claimed your life.

These stories serve as a reminder of the power of choice and the importance of fighting for every human’s right to choose their own future.

I’m really excited for y’all to read this one, so please check it out and preorder if you’re interested!

Stick With It; July 30 2025

It’s been a long time since I’ve felt smart.

I can be confident in what I’m talking about and still not feel smart, per se. I think we get used to our own intelligence to the point of assuming everyone knows the things we know, but more. We start undervaluing our minds.

I also think people can be resistant to learning because it makes us feel stupid. In exposing ourselves to a world of knowledge we don’t know, we’re essentially dipping our toes into a wave pool. It’s discouraging.

All this to say, teaching yourself is hard, but so worthwhile.

I’m doing my best to keep up with my Korean lessons, even though I’ve realized that the alphabet alone is just Not Sticking in my brain. I have to keep going over it. Hopefully it’ll click eventually!

Annyeonghaseyo; July 23 2025

I had the perfect title for one of the projects I’ve written in mind this morning, went back to sleep, and forgot it. Sigh.

I’m planning on working as much as possible for the remainder of the week – there’s a portion of my current novel I want to get done before next Monday, but it’s one of the trickier pieces I’ve committed to.

There’s no real reason I want it done before Monday, I should note. It’s an arbitrary deadline I’ve set for myself. But, if I don’t set these deadlines, nothing will ever get done. So even if I don’t meet the deadline, at least I’ll have progress!

Speaking of progress, I’ve picked up my self-guided study of Korean again. I feel like I’m retaining more this time around – mostly because I go over the same lesson again and again rather than rocket through it. My kid is interested in learning too, so I got her a Hangul alphabet workbook. She’s actually jazzed to do homework! What a novel age she’s at.

There are so many things I want to be doing. An exercise routine, learning Korean, writing articles for cash while also having time to write my books. Then, come September, I’m adding schooling to that.

It’s going to be too much for me. I know this. Something’s gonna have to give, and I dread it being any one of those things. Right now, I’m not exercising, which is Not Ideal.

If only being disabled didn’t take up most of my time.