Kay Iscah's Blog, page 18

Why You Should Make Rich Friends....

I've been lucky to run in diverse social circles. I know people who are constantly struggling to stay off the streets, and I've hung out with people who, if they're not in the 1%, are certainly in the top 10. I've "dated" a millionaire, a college professor, and a guy who just lost his entry level job.  (I paid that night.)  All cool guys in different ways. This doesn't strike me as odd, but sometimes I forget how weird I am.

There is something very natural about seeking out friends and acquaintances that are "like us". We often perceive "like us" in terms of race, gender, social status, age, income, etc. This isn't all bad. It helps someone know what we're going through when they're going through it too, and frankly people who share similiar attributes are more likely to be working along beside us, frequenting the same hangouts, or shopping in the same stores.

However too much "like us" stagnation in your social circle often turns into "us vs. them" perception, and that's not so healthy. I am not suggesting you should try to make friends with someone because they're rich. But that you be open to making friends and acquaintances regardless of their income.

Understand "rich" is a subjective term.  By comparison to many people in third world countries, I live a rich lifestyle, and I've never made more than $1500 during a month.

Regardless of the numbers, it can be awkward hanging out with people who make more than you (whether $10,000 or $100,000 more).  They think less about eating out and other entertainment costs.  They may complain about incomes that you envy.  They plan trips you can't afford to take and tell you how fun they were.  And if you focus on these things, it can be pretty miserable.

On the other hand, if you keep your focus on the things you have in common and respect, even celebrate your differences, these can be really rewarding relationships.  You may share religious values, a love of Star Wars, a sports team, a political party, etc.

You can't be best friends with everybody, but if you find yourself intimidated by an expensive watch, be aware that you may be applying a stereotype to someone without giving yourself a chance to learn who they are as a person.

"Rich" friends may be better connected, may be able to afford better gifts, may be more willing to cover you when they just want company.  Don't hold this against them.  They need real friends just like the rest of us.

The Sales Trap

I think I ought to clarify some things from my last post.  I bought those shirts last week because I though they were pretty, comfortable, and fit me well, and I've been on a quest to slowly upgrade my wardrobe.  Not because they were $3.  The low price meant I was able to buy the shirts, but not that I should.  A good deal isn't truly a good deal unless it's something you actually need.

This is a hard concept sometimes for us bargain hunters.  We get that addictive rush of adrenaline when we find something at a great price.  Often we hurry to snatch it up before stopping to ask ourselves, "Do I really need this?" 

The deals I pass up make for less interesting posts, but they are far more plentiful.  Oh, look, long, sparkly natural bees was candles.  Originally $15 and marked down to $2.  Fair price.  But I have a box full of candles.  Pajamas hanging on the $1 rack?  Good deal, but plenty of nightwear in the closet.  $10 for a set of dishes that originally costs $80?  Great deal, but I don't have my own a kitchen.

On the flip side, it's perfectly fine to spend $120 on a good quality coat, if you have the money, need a coat, and really like this particular coat.  I have two coats in my closet currently that were close to $100 when my parents bough them for me back in high school.  They've both kept me warm for 10-15 years and are likely to survive a few years more, so I think that was a reasonable investment.

Stores run sales and offer clearance racks, because it draws people in and encourages them to shop there.  Nothing wrong with that.  It's job of the store to sell things.  It's your responsibility as a consumer to shop with a purpose.  Be aware of what you have and what you need, so you can know when a "good deal" is a good buy for you.  Otherwise you're just wasting money in smaller increments.

Buying Out of Season

Scored two $3 shirts from Walmart tonight.   There were some short sleeves in the mix, but mostly long sleeves and sweaters.  Another aisle hosted 50% off shirts (mostly Valentine's themed stuff, but for some items this merely meant they were pink or had a heart somewhere on them), hoodies, and kid's coats with a single $1 rack of heart peppered wearables.  February, the coldest month in these parts, always strikes me as an odd time to clearance winter clothes.  But the shopping season tends to run about a month or two a head of the actual seasons.  So if you're feeling the nip, this may be a good time to shop for warmer threads.

It was a good night for bargain hunting all around.  Scored a hardback novel from my favorite author off the clearance rack at Books-A-Million.  It was marked $2, but my sister has a membership card, so I paid $1.97 with tax.

My Dollar Tree (an everything's-a-dollar type store) shopping had been a little dry lately, but tonight I scored two Progresso's Lentil Soup cans (I get two meals out of each of these, so definitely $1 Meal Plan friendly) and a box of Quaker Oats Mix-Up Creations (8 servings, 13 cents per serving, very $1 Meal Plan friendly).  Two wooden Thomas Puzzles for my nephew (potty training bribes), and a bag of 8 Snyders mini-pretzels (nice grab and go item for lunch boxes, also 13 cents each).

Of course there have been tons of Valentine's candy mark downs to tempt this week.  I've been pretty good at resisting.  I was tempted by the marked down roses I saw both potted and cut.  I was too busy to do the research this week, but the thought occured that planting a rose bush may be a fresh alternative to cut flowers for V-day.  The symbolism seemed better.  Just not sure if February is a good planting time.


P.S. I appreciate your indulgence while I dust off my rusty comic drawing skills.

P.S.S. For those of you new to the blog, howdy.  I'm Kay Iscah, author of Living Single on Minimum Wage.  This blog is supplemental to the book and caters to low-income singles without kids.  We'll be at the Gallatin Public Library (Gallatin, TN) tomorrow from 12:30-2:30 talking about our book.  Hope to be in your town soon.

Writer's Block: Singles Awareness Day

Looks like I'll be spending Valentine's Day with two cute, young men this year...I'm babysitting.

Working with the nice people over at www.thriftyandgreen.com to get this journal linked to their site as a feed.  I decided it was time to upgrade to a paid account.  A few things will change.  T&G has guidelines, so my posts should be regular and more structured in the future.  Also there will be ads of some kind...hopefully not too intrusive.  If I understand properly, those of you with paid accounts still won't see any ads when following the blog through LJ.  But everybody else will.

Oh, and there will be images.  Photos when relevant, but it'll usually be a black and white comic like above.  Black and white loads faster...size may vary, but I won't let them get crazy.  Anybody still on dial up?

I know I speculated about doing single parent posts, but after talking it over with the co-author, we're just not ready for that.  Going to get back to the $1 Meal Plan stuff.  We decided that was going to be more relevant to the most people.

We will be working on a You Tube channel, with short videos on budgeting/finance/thrift.  Plan is to have at least one video up before the end of the month, but I'd rather delay and post something decent than rush and make a mess.

We're appearing at Gallatin Public Library this Saturday at 12:30pm in Gallatin, TN.  Not far from Vol State Community College.  Hope to see you there!

P.S. This wasn't originally intended as a writer's block reply, but given the question of the day, I couldn't resist.

Don't Be Greece

Greek Protests Continue As Lawmakers Pass Severe Austerity Measures        

At the end of the article: "The delays have our imprint. We should not blame foreigners for them," she said. "We have finally found out that you have to pay back what you have borrowed."

Debt rarely solves a financial problems, only delays them. The article implies that Greece's main problem is they're not producing at a rate to keep up with their spending.

Greece is an old country with a long and fantastic history. So when I say "Don't be Greece", I mean we all need to be active about our finances, so they don't spin out of control or explode on us. Little changes for the better here and now can save you from having to make more drastic, less pleasant changes in the future.

Unfortunately ignoring a problem won't make it go away.

Upcoming Singles Awareness Day

(So I can't commit to posting breaks....)

Great Article: Why I'm Not Married    

Valentines rears it's ugly head again in two days.  If you're in a good relationship now, I wish you a happy V-day.  Enjoy it.

If not...eh, depending on where you are this month, it can range from "no big deal" to "why are people jabbing my heart with a pointy stick?".  I find myself mostly indifferent this year, but I've been to why-me place too.

For the searching, I'm still a fan of www.okcupid.com as far as free dating sites go.  Sure you have to dodge the crazies, but I've met some awesome people through that site.  The questions, journals, and match numbers really set it a cut above any other free site I've found.  Be safe.  Use common sense.  Public, well lit place and come in your own vehicle for first date...give only first names and limited contact info.

If you're in a celebrating mood, Valentine's can be used to celebrate other forms of love.  Find something nice to do for your friends or family.  Heck, buy yourself flowers.  It's okay to love yourself.  Or just enjoy the post-valentine's chocolate sales.

If you just want to be distracted, look up "Horrible Histories" on youtube.  Nothing Valentine's about it, thus the distraction.

Transparency

In my pursuit to streamline my webpresence, I'm considering moving this blog to www.thirftyandgreen.com  I like the philosophy of the site, and they can help me set things up so I can earn a little ad revenue (part of me hates that, but I need it).  I love LJ, warts and all, it's been home for quite a while.  I'm trying to figure out the exact future of this blog.  I certainly want to stay involved with poor_skills , moneysmart , baby_poor , and advice4teens communities.  I may be able to tie the two together seemlessly.  My co-author and I are working on a second niche financial book, this one for single parents...and I'm considering expanding blog topics to include them...but erm...kids make things more complicated.  May be a good time to go back to that food focus for a while.

After recent posts on creating an effective web presence for job hunting reasons, I stumbled across an AOL video regarding "become your own brand".  I almost shared the link on the blog, since it mainly dealt with this web presence concept but part of me rebelled strongly.  Even good ideas can be taken too far, and I think this personal "branding" may be one of them.  Certainly it's wise to be consistent and aware that once you release something to the web it may come back at any time to haunt you.  But when did people become brands?  Certaintly it's good to stand for something, but must it be only one thing?  Can't we be well rounded men and women in the Renaissance style?  Can't we evolve?



I am a writer. Whether I'll be a writer of any note is up to my readers to decide, but it's the best term I have to describe myself. I'm also a good singer, a fair artist, a teacher, a critic, an editor, an intellectual, budding theologian, and a half-decent dancer with an orange belt in karate. I cannot juggle, repair cars, or play an instrument with any skill; still I think my knowledge and interests are varied and deep enough to claim the title of Renaissance Woman.

Big deal you may say, and you'd have every right to. I'm hardly the only person to have more than one interest or talent. However we are in the age of branding. Yes, you too, normal citizen that you thought you were, have now become a brand. If you have a YouTube Channel or Facebook page, you are practically a public figure, easily googled before a job interview or first date. This isn't all bad. The internet allows everyman to speak a little louder, and there's a certain accountability instilled by publicity.

Current publishing logic says that you should build your name into a brand. Nothing wrong with that. We all would like to represent certain values and standards. However if you would like to write a romance, a mystery, and a comedy, publishers would also like to you to have three names, even if they're just "wink wink" names. Authorica Famousia writing as Mysteriousa Roberts. Heaven forbid, Suze Orman write a romance novel as Suze Orman. Her name has been branded for financial advice. That would be like comedian Jim Carrey acting in a dramatic role or the guy who played Herman Munster writing and illustrating children's books. Except, well, the last two have done that, and fairly successfully. Using one platform's fame to step gracefully onto another.

Certainly there's some logic in brand names, P&G has Crest and Duracell rather than P&G toothpaste and P&G batteries. But P&G is a large company with many people to keep track of these brands. Certainly there's a limit to the number of brand names a single person can juggle. So I've limited myself to three: Kay Iscah for non-fiction, Iscah for fiction, and -K (negative K) for my music. I refuse to juggle more. I refuse to stick to a single genre, topic, or style in any of them. My consistency is partly in my variety. I admire people who do one thing and do it well, but for me it's the surest road to madness. If this is my death in the publishing industry, so be it. Better a private heaven, than a public hell.

To my readers I ask for your forgiveness and indulgence. I will attempt to title and group related works in a recognizable way. I will not think any less of you if you love my books and hate my music or read my comics but pass up my theological commentary. I can not promise to do everything well, but I will do as well as I can. It's up to you to decide if it's good enough.
Cut, because honestly it has nothing to do with personal finance.  I was just in a sharing mood.  I may take a break from posting, while I figure out exactly how this "move" will work.  Opinions and ideas welcome.

Hm...that doesn't look right...

An article worth the reading: 5 Signs You're Getting Robbed at the Hospital

Trying to understand doctors bills can be a major headache sometimes, but it's important to make sure you're not paying more than your fair share.  I need to check up with my insurance about an eye doctor bill that still seems oddly high, but this is connected to the issues I was having about last years coverage.

Oh, and if you have vanishing/shrinking deductible make sure your insurance isn't using it as an excuse to quietly raise your rates each year.  Last year, it saved me money to have them draw up a fresh policy for me at the original deductible rate.  May have to do it again this year.

Haste Makes Waste

I spent several hours attempting to clean up the wreckage of a social faux pas on Facebook this week.  No need for details, but the main complaint was that I had jumped to (and shared) conclusions before taking time to get all the facts.  It wasn't work or book related, but it did illustrate to me how quickly these things spin out of control.

In the rush to get tax documents done early, I tried to add up my taxable interest myself (which is perfectly ok), but I didn't read carefully and ended up about $20 off.  This isn't unfixable and won't make a huge difference on the return, but it does mean I'll have to spend some time filling out a 1040X and may have to sacrafice a stamp, since I don't think the Free File extends to X forms.

Yesterday, I realized I need to get some promotional materials out to the Gallatin library that day for our author talk on the February 18th.  I spent three hours designing, printing, and cutting out over 100 bookmarks, delivered most of them to the Gallatin Library (which is BEAUTIFUL).  To make the trip more efficient we headed over to Vol State, at which point we realized all the book marks had JAN instead of FEB on them.  The awesome people at the library helped us out, but it still meant buying whiteout and red pens from the campus bookstore and an extra hour spent fixing each one by hand.

I think of the 5000 things on my to do list, and these make me sigh.  No we can't be prefectly efficient machines.  But with a little more patience and care, I would have saved a lot of time and energy.

Time is a very important factor in personal finance.  We've heard "Time is Money", and there's a degree of truth to that.  We get paid, not just for our knowledge and skill but, for our time.  Interest is accrued over time.  Deadlines, windows, office hours....

Sometimes all these demands leave us with the not unreasonable idea that we should squeeze all we can out of every minute.  Multi-task, focus, hurry from here to there, snag some overtime, get it done, done, done.  But even good ideas can be taken overboard.  When we start going too fast and squeezing too much in, this hyper activity backfires.  We need to pad our tasks with time, the same way we encourage you to pad your budget.  If it should take an hour, give yourself an hour and a half.

Life, particularly a harmonious life, is a balancing act.  The times where I feel I have the best handle on managing my time is when moving through all the "to do"s of the day feels like a dance rather than a race.

No Zombies, but That's Good News

Had a blast at Mt. Juliet and Madison libraries this weekend.  Madison asked us back for their personal finance week in April.  And it got us another 5 star review on Amazon.  Apparently we have one of those love it or hate books.

Looks like we'll be in Gallatin and Hendersonville in February.  More details when I have them.

Egads, February starts in 30 minutes...

Kindle files have yet to be updated... All I can say in my defense is that there's a 3 year old in potty training who likes attention.