Ally Blue's Blog, page 16

"Like most women, I currently live in a society where violence, harassment and scary shit can break..."

“Like most women, I currently live in a society where violence, harassment and scary shit can break out at any moment, just because I told some random asshole “no” without bothering to be nice about it. Doing that is so dangerous that most women don’t dare; after a few scary incidents, they learn to make up excuses, to smile, to be sweet and welcoming, to act as if every single random asshole on the street is a precious new friend that they would just LOVE to stand outside of the Chipotle and chat with FOR HOURS, if only cruel fate had not intervened. That’s what it’s actually like, being a woman: Playing nice with every random asshole, because this random asshole might be the one who hurts you. And then, if he hurts you anyway, they’ll tell you that you led him on.”

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Tiger Beatdown (via pnasty)

This is so relevant to everything.

(via mindyshabibti)

THIS THIS THIS. 

This is what rape culture looks like.

(via silverqueen)

I really shouldn’t have to be grateful that the last guy I turned down just accepted it. That should be the NORM, not the exception.

(via age-of-alejandro)

So sad, and so horribly, horribly true. 

sydscorner:Favourite humans everReblog forever until the end...

sydscorner:

Favourite humans ever

Reblog forever until the end of time!

"So fuck you, MRAs. Fuck you for showing up every time women speak, especially about rape and abuse,..."

“So fuck you, MRAs. Fuck you for showing up every time women speak, especially about rape and abuse, and trying to make it all about you. Fuck you for derailing threads about the victims of Marc Lépine, a man who screamed about his hatred for feminists as he murdered fourteen women and injured many others, because you also hate feminists and want a fucking cookie for not killing anyone. Fuck you for making rape and death threats against young women who dared to protest a speaking engagement by a man who thinks little girls would enjoy being raped by their fathers if it weren’t for society telling them it’s dirty. Fuck you for whining about how unfair it is that women might wonder if you’re a rapist when you approach them out of nowhere, while completely ignoring how unfair it is that women feel the need to be on guard all the time in public. Or that if we relax and behave normally — drinking, dancing, dressing however we want — you will be the first motherfuckers in line to blame us for getting ourselves raped.”

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A+++ rant from Kate Harding on the MRA movement and how it’s not actually about the real issues men face, but about putting feminists in their place.

(originally appeared on Jezebel)

I might have to reblog this everyday.

(via feminishblog)

WHAT SHE SAID. All of it. 

laurennmcc:“If you can’t afford to tip you can’t afford to eat...

laurennmcc:

“If you can’t afford to tip you can’t afford to eat out.”

My husband works INCREDIBLY hard for his low wage, no health care and tips. He has kept us together while I have been in grad school by working at a job where he has to be nice to people that treat him like dirt. That this woman thinks that he wouldn’t be worth $6 of her “godly money” makes me insane with rage. 

mercurialme:

lukeybabee:

guardiancomment:

Chelsea Welch, the US waitress who was fired after she posted a picture of a tip receipt on Reddit, wrote for us:

I was a waitress at Applebee’s restaurant in Saint Louis. I was fired Wednesday for posting a picture on Reddit.com of a note a customer left on a bill. I posted it on the web as a light-hearted joke.

This didn’t even happen at my table. The note was left for another server, who allowed me to take a picture of it at the end of the night.

Someone had scribbled on the receipt, “I give God 10%. Why do you get 18?”

I assumed the customer’s signature was illegible, but I quickly started receiving messages containing Facebook profile links and websites, asking me to confirm the identity of the customer. I refused to confirm any of them, and all were incorrect.

I worked with the Reddit moderators to remove any personal information. I wanted to protect the identity of both my fellow server and the customer. I had no intention of starting a witch-hunt or hurting anyone.

Now I’ve been fired.

The person who wrote the note came across an article about it, called the Applebee’s location, and demanded everyone be fired — me, the server who allowed me to take the picture, the manager on duty at the time, the manager not on duty at the time, everyone. It seems I was fired not because Applebee’s was represented poorly, not because I did anything illegal or against company policy, but because I embarrassed this person.

In light of the situation, I would like to make a statement on behalf of wait staff everywhere: We make $3.50 an hour. Most of my paychecks are less than pocket change because I have to pay taxes on the tips I make.

After sharing my tips with hosts, bussers, and bartenders, I make less than $9 an hour on average, before taxes. I am expected to skip bathroom breaks if we are busy. I go hungry all day if I have several busy tables to work. I am expected to work until 1:30am and then come in again at 10:30am to open the restaurant.

I have worked 12-hour double shifts without a chance to even sit down. I am expected to portray a canned personality that has been found to be least offensive to the greatest amount of people. And I am expected to do all of this, every day, and receive change, or even nothing, in return. After all that, I can be fired for “embarrassing” someone, who directly insults his or her server on religious grounds.

In this economy, $3.50 an hour doesn’t cut it. I can’t pay half my bills. Like many, I would love to see a reasonable, non-tip-dependent wage system for service workers like they have in other countries. But the system being flawed is not an excuse for not paying for services rendered.

I need tips to pay my bills. All waiters do. We spend an hour or more of our time befriending you, making you laugh, getting to know you, and making your dining experience the best it can be. We work hard. We care. We deserve to be paid for that.

I am trying to stand up for all of us who work for just a few dollars an hour at places like Applebee’s. Whether a chain steakhouse or a black-tie establishment, tipping is not optional. It is how we get paid.

I posted a picture to make people laugh, but now I want to make a serious point: Things like this happen to servers all the time. People seem to think that the easiest way to save money on a night out is to skip the tip.

I can’t understand why I was fired over this. I was well liked and respected at Applebee’s. My sales were high, my managers had no problems with me, and I was even hoping to move up to management soon. When I posted this, I didn’t represent Applebee’s in a bad light. In fact, I didn’t represent them at all.

I did my best to protect the identity of all parties involved. I didn’t break any specific guidelines in the company handbook – I checked. But because this person got embarrassed that their selfishness was made public, Applebee’s has made it clear that they would rather lose a dedicated employee than an angry customer. That’s a policy I can’t understand.

I am equally baffled about how a religious tithe is in any way related to paying for services at a restaurant. I can understand why someone could be upset with an automatic gratuity. However, it’s a plainly stated Applebee’s policy that a tip is added automatically for parties over eight like the one this customer was part of. I cannot control that kind of tip; it’s done by the computer that the orders are put into. I’ve been stiffed on tips before, but this is the first time I’ve seen the “Big Man” used as reasoning.

Obviously the person who wrote this note wanted it seen by someone. It’s strange that now that the audience is wider than just the server, the person is ashamed.

I have no agenda here. I seek no revenge against the note writer. I have no interest in exposing their identity, and, at this point, I’m not even sure I want my job back. I was just trying to make a joke, but I came home unemployed.

I’ve been waiting tables to save up some money so I could finally go to college, so I could get an education that would qualify me for a job that doesn’t force me to sell my personality for pocket change.

I totally understand how this person feel I was a server at ihop

This is fucked up and is the norm. You can’t demand that people play into the system as it’s set up, play the game, move up in life legally and with out the help of government ( and in many cases family) only to stiff them.
If you can’t afford to tip you can’t afford to eat out.

And this would be why I always tip well, unless someone is actively being a dick to me for no reason. Because wait staff are paid like crap in America, and they work their asses off. This so-called “godly” person needs a good smack in the face. Also, I think I’m not going to Applebee’s again. FSM knows there are better places to eat.

"Teachers are often unaware of the gender distribution of talk in their classrooms. They usually..."

“Teachers are often unaware of the gender distribution of talk in their classrooms. They usually consider that they give equal amounts of attention to girls and boys, and it is only when they make a tape recording that they realize that boys are dominating the interactions.

Dale Spender, an Australian feminist who has been a strong advocate of female rights in this area, noted that teachers who tried to restore the balance by deliberately ‘favouring’ the girls were astounded to find that despite their efforts they continued to devote more time to the boys in their classrooms. Another study reported that a male science teacher who managed to create an atmosphere in which girls and boys contributed more equally to discussion felt that he was devoting 90 per cent of his attention to the girls. And so did his male pupils. They complained vociferously that the girls were getting too much talking time.

In other public contexts, too, such as seminars and debates, when women and men are deliberately given an equal amount of the highly valued talking time, there is often a perception that they are getting more than their fair share. Dale Spender explains this as follows:

The talkativeness of women has been gauged in comparison not with men but with silence. Women have not been judged on the grounds of whether they talk more than men, but of whether they talk more than silent women.

In other words, if women talk at all, this may be perceived as ‘too much’ by men who expect them to provide a silent, decorative background in many social contexts. This may sound outrageous, but think about how you react when precocious children dominate the talk at an adult party. As women begin to make inroads into formerly ‘male’ domains such as business and professional contexts, we should not be surprised to find that their contributions are not always perceived positively or even accurately.”

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[x] (via neighborly)

Sadly, I am utterly unsurprised.

I could not bring myself to “like” this, because...

I could not bring myself to “like” this, because it’s sad & horrible. But I CAN share. Pass it on.

All states except Oregon now limit abortion access

All states except Oregon now limit abortion access:

Suddenly Portland looks cooler than ever…

From a text chat w/my girl-child a couple of years ago...

ME: (talking about a pic someone emailed me of a lucious doughnut) Doughnuts are evil.

GIRL-CHILD: They’re not evil, they’re a reflection of your own evil nature.

ME: O_O

GIRL-CHILD: I go to college! :D

edwardspoonhands:melissaanelli:edwardspoonhands:ehmeegee:...

edwardspoonhands:

melissaanelli:

edwardspoonhands:

ehmeegee:

Let me preface this by saying people are entitled to their opinions.  I came into the YouTube universe knowing that 1. I was very very new at it and there would be a learning curve, and 2. People are rude on the Internet, and I have to steel myself against their negativity and basically realize that haters gonna hate.  Fine. Done. 

What I do have a problem with are comments like these: not because they are focused on or directly for me, but because they are about women everywhere.  I make it my objective to be a role model for young people (especially women) to feel as though science can be an accessible field that they have the ability to be successful in — something based entirely off of their talent and intellect, and not focused at all on their gender or looks.  These comments insinuate that the viewers are only listening because I’m a woman on a science channel, not because the content is interesting, and whatever is coming out of my mouth is second only in importance to the objectified body that’s saying it.  I don’t care that people don’t like my clothes — I care that young women will see these comments and feel as though they can’t be ‘good at science’ or smart or revered or respected unless they look attractive, or play up their sex appeal.  As if we have to appeal to the male demographic by being sexy, or risk being unheard.  

I’m not going to go away or be deterred, and I’m not going to change my clothes or dress sexier to get more viewership.  I am, however, without a doubt going to spend every fiber of my being celebrating young women and men in encouraging them to follow what drives them, motivate them to research what they are passionate about, and support them in making the world a better place… one un-sexy cardigan at a time. 

I have very little to add…Emily is awesome, some other people are not, and sexism is really weird and annoying. You can her debut as a host of SciShow News here.

I really, REALLY want the phrase, “Making the world a better place one unsexy cardigan at a time” on a shirt. if it could fit. Or hey, a cardigan. Or a sticker. Or on my goddamned forehead.

LoL @ Melissa. Emily is like a t-shirt idea factory. 

In related news, the ENTIRE comments section of that video is now replies to one of the original jerk-face commenters. But mixed in there, a herpetologist working in Madagascar who has discovered EIGHT SPECIES of reptile commented…and all of the arguing buried his comment. So here it is, thumb it up!

And let’s stop the argument, because the guy obviously doesn’t understand where self-esteem comes from or what clothes are for or why his relationship with females is broken…but we’re not going to fix him in YouTube comments…because that’s now how people get fixed. Let’s let the comments be about the content and stop feeding the troll.

Stupid sexist trolls. Ugh.

So we’re watching Idiocracy right now. This is going to...

So we’re watching Idiocracy right now. This is going to happen, isn’t it? **is skeert**