Julia Rachel Barrett's Blog, page 26

The Tarantula on the Ceiling.

So you know how it is, right? You come home after being away for 2 hours and 40 minutes because your son left his cell phone at your house by mistake– so you drive to meet him at the halfway point, which takes an hour, and the two of you spend some time at a produce stand and you drive home through obnoxious traffic and you unload the car, carrying your purse, your water bottle, and four heavy bags of fresh produce and the dog greets you at the door but your husband is there, in his home offi...

When the heroine makes a mistake…

It’s always that essential sumthin’-sumthin’. I study movies in order to figure out what works and what doesn’t. Helps a lot with my writing.

I’d like to dissect two movies, similar themes– Sleeping With the Enemy starring Julia Roberts and Enough starring Jennifer Lopez. (I’m gonna go out on a limb here and claim that aside from her brilliant channeling of Selena in Selena, Slim Hiller in Enough might just be Jennifer Lopez’s best role. Besides, the child actor in the film, Tessa Allen who pl...

I believe…

There is only one Mr. Spock.

Accept no substitutes.

Soft ginger cookies are perfect with ginger peach tea and wild flower honey.

Ginger cookie experiment #1.

In milk chocolate.

Lowell George and Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart are the two greatest composers of the last 500 years.

In children and dogs and a goldfish named Stuffy.

Stuffy.

In birdie kisses.

In taking an occasional risk. Hell, being born is the biggest risk of all.

In football, baseball and women’s fastpitch softball.

I believe in riding a horse ve...

Bitchin’.

Bitchin’ is a powerful word. It has two diametrically opposed definitions.

According to the Urban Dictionary–

Bitchin’: good, fuckin’ great, awesome, bad-ass fine.

Bitchin’: whinging, whining, complaining.

I think self-publishing is bitchin’. It’s wicked cool to have control over my creations from start to finish.

I feel like bitchin’ about the fact that I have zero control over four of my books. Gotta hold out for another couple years.

And when I’m in such a bitchin’ mood, nothing lifts me higher...

When no means no. And no, this has nothing to do with Robin Thicke and the Blurred Lines video although I think it should.

That graffiti painted on the wall in the Blurred Lines video is blinding me in retrospect and now I forgot what I was going to post. Damn.

It seems to me that if you have to spray paint Robin Thicke has a big dick on the wall in a creepy music video the entire world will watch, with the possible exception of Saudi Arabia, (because you know countries are people too as in Russia keeps calling me), it probably isn’t all that big. The dick, I mean, not the country. Not that I have any personal kno...

The Yellow Jacket Covalent.

So this yellow jacket flies into a bar…

A new breed of yellow jacket.

Oh I wish it was a joke!

This beady eye!

But yeah, this yellow jacket flies up to me and hovers right in front of me and he tilts his head and gives me the beady eyeand he just hovers there, kind of studying me and he says… “Don’t I know you? I swear we’ve met before.”

And I’m like…. don’t make eye contact, don’t make eye contact, back away slowly, just back away…

And he flies a little closer and he’s like… “No, you look so famil...

‘Russia’ Calling…

You know, I have strange bedfellows in my liberal/moderate/conservative head. And I’m afraid because of that I’m making enemies or, worse, frenemies.

You see, I follow both Glen Greenwald (major agendized liberal with whom I often disagree) and Ann Coulter, major bitchy spiteful conservative with whom I often disagree.

So when my cell phone rings and the message says… Russia… I get just a tad nervous. Because? If I answer am I gonna hear– “Snowden calling for Julia Barrett?” Or “Hold for Presid...

The Tao of Football.

The Tao is a Chinese concept or philosophy known as the way. Laozi (or Lao Tsu) says in the foundational text of Taoism, the Tao Te Ching, the Tao is the underlying natural order of the universe which, as opposed to material manifestations, cannot be named.

Thus, football. Therein lies its essence– an underlying natural order of sport which cannot be named.

It’s that time of year again, ladies and germs… Football Season in the great old US of A! College ball has already started. The pros play f...

The Five Greatest Moments in My Life.

1. The birth of my son.

2. When the love of my life appeared at my door, out of the blue, after we had not spoken to each other in six years.

3. The birth of my older daughter.

4. The birth of my youngest daughter.

5. Big Game against our cross-town rival. We were up 1-0, 2 outs. Bottom of the 7th. (Seven innings in fastpitch softball) My youngest daughter was starting at catcher as a freshman, having battled close-minded small town sports politics her entire softball career. The game was on the...

Blog much?

I tried to stop, to kick the habit, but as you can see here I am.

Anyway, what I want to say today is this– A few dear friends and family members are going through some pretty tough times.

I won’t mention names, but please know my thoughts and prayers are with you every day.

Coming soon – thoughts about fall. Maybe we’ll talk football, books, blogging, education, food, dogs and cats living together… This is a really weird time in history, folks. I hope there’s a future for my children, and if I...