Lori Degman's Blog, page 7

Poetry Month - Day 13: Nihilist

Ok, when you're given the word, Nihilist (thanks a lot, Linda), it's really hard to be funny - so, I got a little deep on this one! I'm a non-religious person and always thought of myself as non-spiritual, until I started researching nihilists to write this poem. Now I think, compared to a nihilist, I'm Mother Theresa!!

NihilistHenry was a nihilistwho longed to make a change.And so he hired a stylist,which seemed a little strange.
He got a re-do, “Oprah style”,from shoes up to his hair.But still, behind his brand new smile,poor Henry didn’t care.
The stylist took a different tackand worked on Henry’s mind.He filled his head with lots of facts.Still, Henry was unkind.
Then, just before he called it quitshe thought of something smart:to pull up Henry from the pits,he’d have to reach his heart!
The stylist taught him how to “see”;to redefine his scope.And that’s how Henry came to bea man with new-found hope

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Poetry Month - Day 12: Kumquat

Shellie Braeuner, the winner of the first Cheerios Spoonfuls of Stories New Author Contest, with her book The Great Dog Wash , suggested the word Kumquat.  Unfortunately, I didn't get around to writing it until just now because I went out after work to hear a co-worker's band and I just got home.  So, I wrote a quick song parody, to the tune of I'm a Little Teapot.  I hope you like it, Shellie!



KumquatI’m a little kumquatshort and squatsweet on the outsidemy inside’s notPick me in spring whenit’s not hoteat me quick or I may rot!

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Poetry Month - Day 11: Verjuice

Today's lovely word, Verjuice, was suggested by the even lovelier, Matt Forrest! This was Matt's word in Round 1 of March Madness - tough word! Read his awesome poem here. He used the "sour juice from unripe grapes" meaning and I used the "sour in temper, expression" meaning.  
I let this poem lead me where it wanted to go and it ended up a little sappy and I couldn't think of a funny, twist ending. If anyone wants to attempt a new ending, please share it in the comments! (The Grumpy Bear is for my son, Sean)! :-)


VerjuiceThey call her Crabby AppletonShe’s grumpy and verjuiced.She loves the clouds and spurns the sun,She needs a little boost!
I gave her lots of toys and thingsTo brighten up her mood.I even brought a bird that sings,but that just made her brood.
Some chocolate cake will do the trick,It works most every time.She scoffed and said, “It makes me sick!”As if it were a crime!
Then, finally I’d had enough“Just stay in here and pout!”She crossed her arms in quite a huffand shouted, “Good - get out!!”
But, as I slowly closed the doorI heard a little cry.“My friends don’t like me anymore.I really don’t know why!”
I went back in and told the truth“I know what’s wrong with you.You’re grumpy, mean and so uncouth,But here’s what you can do!”
I taught her how to love the sunand how to smile, not frown.And soon she learned to have some funinstead of feeling down.
So, now she’s Happy Appleton.She’s cheery day and night.When people see her, they don’t run.‘cause she’s a welcome sight!

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Poetry Month - Day 10: Mediocre

Todays word, Mediocre, was suggested by my co-worker, Marybeth (who is anything by mediocre)! I had a hard time rhyming it so, sadly, the poem is a bit like the word (so don't get your hopes up).



MediocreMediocre’s not so bad.  It’s better than horrific.Not as bad as horrible, although it’s not terrific
But if you’re mediocre at the things you shouldn’t do,Then that would mean you’re really great!  Now, don’t you think that’s true?
Like being a big liar or a cheater or a smoker.I’m proud to say, that those are things at which I’m mediocre!


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Poetry Month - Day 9: Scintillating

Today's word, Scintillating, came from my writer-friend, Beth Stilborn - thanks Beth!  It's funny - this poem went in a direction I didn't anticipate - I LOVE when that happens.  I hope I don't get in trouble for it! * 




ScintillatingWay back in the day, when I was still dating,I met a great guy who was scintillating.He also was cute.  He was funny and smart,but had a bad habit, he always would _____.
He’d _____ after breakfast.  He’d _____ after lunch.
And right after dinner, he’d _____ a  whole bunch.
But out at the movies, the stores or at parties,
He'd use self control and release little _____ ies.
He could make babies cry. He could make flowers wilt.He’d float up in air if he wore a thick kilt.  Our friends?  They all shunned us.  It sure wasn't fun.And even the skunks would all turn tail and run.
I bet that you’re wondering, where is this fellow?Did they get married?  And, did this guy “mellow”?Oh, yes, we’ve been married for 29 years.I just wear a clothes pin until the _____ clears!

*Any resemblance to my husband is purely coincidental!
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