JohnA Passaro's Blog, page 26
September 22, 2019
Respect the Sport and the Sport Will Respect You
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Knowledge will give you power,
But character respect.
Bruce Lee
The Merriam-Webster dictionary defines respect as, “A feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.”
If you as a wrestler do the work necessary to become successful, whether success is reached, or not, people involved in this sport will notice.
If you as a wrestler develop the qualities that are necessary to go to battle against adversity and your integrity in times of turmoil remains true, people involved in this sport will honor you.
If you are one of the lucky ones that achieve great things in this sport, the people in this sport will applaud you.
Understand, achieving great things is measured by the distance from where you started to where you finished.
It is not measured by standing at the highest point on a podium for a few seconds.
Some of the greatest achievements in the sport of wrestling occur by those whose measured distance is unknown by others.
In those situations, you will earn the highest form of respect.
Your own.
#wrestling
book link in bio
Wrestling Rules for Life
September 21, 2019
Be At Your Best When You Feel Your Worst
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The flower that blooms in adversity
Is the rarest and most beautiful of all.
Walt Disney
I don’t condone sucking weight, but I do believe that everyone should experience it at least once.
It will help one understand what it means to have to be at your best when you feel your worst.
We have all been there.
Not eating or drinking for a long period, being dangerously near dehydration with all your energy zapped from you and then having to take the mat against an opponent who not only wants to defeat you but also wants to humiliate you in the process.
No food, no water, no recovery time, no energy.
Regardless, peak performance is still expected.
Against an elite opponent.
With your season at stake.
And everything you have worked for in complete jeopardy.
Experiencing cutting weight in wrestling prepares you to be at your best when you feel your worst in life.
There is no other endeavor on earth that will mimic how it feels to be a parent of a sick child.
As an adult, there will be a night where you will have to stay up with your sick child, and then you will be required to go to work the next day and perform at your best with your job on the line.
And then repeat the process the next day.
And the next.
And the next.
With no recovery time, and no energy.
And peak performance in every aspect of your life will still be expected.
It has been said that a wrestling match starts once you become tired.
Everyone can wrestle with good technique and good discipline when the conditions are right.
Everyone is full of hope when they are winning.
But only the few can prosper when the conditions are grueling.
When you are behind in the score.
When things look bleak.
When life and circumstance seem unfair, unjust.
The key to doing so is to be able to perform at your best when you feel your worst.
To keep your belief.
Your discipline.
Your hope.
In life, when things are going wrong, and you feel your worst is when your family will rely on you the most.
You must come through.
When you are in this situation, when you feel your worst and must perform your best, just get through the weight cut.
Make the weight.
And then perform your best.
You’ve done this many time before.
“Be At Your Best When You Feel Your Worst,”
Is a chapter from the newly released,
“Wrestling Rules for Life”
September 20, 2019
Pick the Right Partner
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For he today,
That sheds his blood with me,
Shall always be my brother.
Shakespeare
Henry V
There is nothing more important in wrestling and life than to pick the right partner.
The right partner is someone who has the same beliefs, the same value system, and the same lifestyle as you.
It is someone who brings out the best in you.
It is someone willing to bleed alongside you.
****
The greatest partnerships in wrestling and marriage are two people who make each other better in their journey to make themselves better.
Not two people who are solely trying to make themselves better.
Not one person becoming better at the detriment of the other.
But rather, two people who both become better because of their alliance to the same goal.
Partnerships break down, and marriages fail when one partner feels the other is not reciprocating in making the other better, they have shifted their focus, concentrating only on making themselves better.
They become a taker and not a giver.
A taker takes, and that only lasts for a certain period.
A giver receives, and that goes on forever.
One of the greatest lessons in wrestling and marriage is learning that the partnership is about making both partners better. They make you better, and you make them better.
It is not a partnership if only one-party benefits.
The partnership needs to benefit both partners.
****
The only time in life when you get to choose your family is in marriage.
Everyone knows the wedding vows,
For better, for worse
For richer, for poorer
In sickness and in health.
How do you know you have the right partner in life?
When you have been dealt,
For worse, for poorer and in sickness and you still consider yourself lucky because you realize it is not what you go through in life; it is who you go through life with.
Shakespeare wrote in Henry V,
“For he today, that sheds his blood with me, shall always be my brother.”
This is a chapter excerpt from “Wrestling Rules for Life”
September 19, 2019
99% Effort Is Not Enough
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The important thing is
That those 20 boys know in 20 years,
They didn’t leave anything on the table.
They played their hearts out.
That’s the important thing.
Herb Brooks
Coach of 1980 US Hockey Team
Imagine that you are shopping for life insurance to protect your family, who are the most important thing in the world to you.
There is a one-million-dollar policy that costs $1,000 a year and covers your family every day of the year.
There is another one-million-dollar policy which only costs $500 a year but doesn’t cover your family on Fridays; if you were to die on a Friday, the policy wouldn’t payout to your family.
Which one would you choose?
Sounds silly right?
Why would someone care enough to take out life insurance but leave themselves vulnerable on Fridays?
It may not be as important as life insurance for your family, but only giving 99% effort towards your goal is the same thing.
Why would you care enough to do 99% only to leave yourself vulnerable by the 1% left undone?
Once it was all said and done, and my wrestling career was over, and I had time to reflect, I realized a major lesson in my wrestling journey was learning to give my all.
100% of it.
Not holding back.
Learning to be all in.
All the time.
No matter what.
Having no vulnerabilities in effort.
I was best able to give 100% by concentrating on what was important and learning to control what I could control.
To not be distracted by the constant noise of life.
Always being on an ongoing journey towards my vision.
When I did that, I was able to live with any outcome, because I knew I did everything I could, there wasn’t one more thing I possibly could have done.
And, then and only then, could I live with any, and all, results.
With no regret.
One of the greatest lessons I have learned from the sport of wrestling is that the outcome isn’t the goal.
Your output is.
You can’t control the outcome.
You can control your output.
The goal is to give 100% of what you have.
And then you can live with any outcome.
100% effort kills regret.
If you give 99%, your peace of mind will be vulnerable for life.
For every 1% that you hold back, is an additional
1% chink in your armor.
For every 1% that you hold back is 1% that goes in your opponent’s opportunity column.
So, don’t hold back.
Don’t pace yourself.
Don’t save some for later.
Why in the world would you be willing to do 99% and then not be willing to do 1% more?
Most people leave the remaining 1% undone because the last 1% is tolling.
The truth is it requires much more effort than it numerically suggests.
There are very few people willing to do significantly more work than 1% to only get 1% in return.
It seems like an unfair trade.
I’m telling you to gladly pay significantly more for the final 1%.
Because what people fail to realize is that last 1% returns to you so much more.
It takes you to a new level.
If you have been fastidious enough to give to 99% effort, one, give yourself credit and then two, go back to work to give the other 1%.
All you can give is all that you have.
Give it all.
And you will always be at peace with yourself.
“99 Effort Is Not Enough”
Is a chapter from the newly released,
“Wrestling Rules for Life”
September 18, 2019
Big League Dreams
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I must confess, I haven’t watched a MLB game in years.
But today I laid out the $15.99 for the MLB tv package for the Seattle Mariners for the remainder of the season.
Why?
I got to watch Just Dunn pitch in his 2nd MLB start for the Seattle Mariners tonight and for 2 more starts before the end of the season.
All I kept saying to myself on every pitch he threw tonight was,
“Good for him.”
“Good for him.”
I love it when BIG dreams come true.
Live In The Zone
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Good and great
Are seldom in the same man.
Winston S. Churchill
Cracker Barrel has a hand-held game where the object of the game is to roll a small ball into a tiny hole by tilting the board it is on in different directions.
It looks easy.
Until you attempt it.
And when you do, no matter how precise your tilt of the board may be, the ball will get close to the hole and carom away.
It takes many, many attempts to get the tilt just right so the ball falls into the hole.
After many attempts and lots of frustration, your tilt will be just right, your poise and balance will be exactly appropriate, and the ball will magnetically roll into the hole.
That is the best description of The Zone.
The Zone is the time and place in life where everything comes together perfectly.
It is where good transitions into great.
****
The zone is a self-made state of massive production.
It is where focus, work, and time combine for phenomenal results.
It is the place where everything goes your way; every break, every call, every roll of the ball, it all goes your way.
The Zone is an extremely rare state, one which is most difficult to get into.
You get “In The Zone” by having extreme focus, discipline, and perseverance.
You get “In The Zone” when you keep pushing good to become great.
Once you arrive “In the Zone” you must preserve your time there like a rodeo rider attempting to stay on a bucking horse for as long as he can.
Every second counts.
Every experience counts.
Time and experience are prerequisites for entry into The Zone.
On each attempt and subsequent failure, you are writing your algorithm for success.
Each attempt becomes better than your last as failure supplies new information for you to incorporate in your next attempt.
With each attempt and subsequent failure, good is getting one step closer to becoming great.
How many attempts will be needed to have good become great?
That is unknown.
But there is an amount.
The challenge is to walk with the unknown until the known is revealed.
Learn to be comfortable in the unknown.
As its mastery is vital to your success.
Thrive in it.
As it will lead you to The Zone.
Where good gets turned into great.
“Live In The Zone”
Is a chapter from the newly released,
“Wrestling Rules for Life”
September 17, 2019
Don’t Take the Bait
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Not all that glitters
Is gold.
It is happening more and more in this era.
Wrestlers who take the bait.
One wrestler dangling his leg out in front of him, unprotected to entice his opponent to take it.
As soon as the wrestler takes the bait, he finds himself spladled on his back.
Match over.
****
Imagine a conversation between two fish.
One fish says to another, “Hey, do you see that juicy worm over there?”
The other fish says, “Stay away from that worm;
I heard there is a hook in it.”
“I know there is, everyone knows there is, but I think I can eat around the hook,” the first fish says.
“Too risky, I’ve heard stories of other fish trying to eat that worm, and they always get hooked,” the other fish says.
“I’m going to try it anyway, my friend asked me to go with him later, and it sounds like fun.
He says it is the best-tasting worm he has ever eaten.
What harm could it do to nibble on the part of the worm furthest from the hook?
I’m not stupid enough to bite at the worm nearest the hook,” the first fish says.
The next day the fish came back with a glowing account of his night.
“You see, I told you, I’m okay. You don’t know what you are missing, that was the most delicious worm I ever had.
I had the time of my life last night.
You should come with me. I’m going back again tonight.”
The first fish wisely stands his ground and declines his friends offer.
The two fish drift apart.
Day after day, the other fish goes back to eat more of the worm.
Day after day, the deliciousness of the worm decreases.
Day after day the amount left of the worm decreases.
One day the two fish bump into each other out of the blue.
The one fish barely recognizes the other.
And once again the other fish invites his friend to go with him.
Once again, he declines.
The fish goes back on his own, and when he gets there, there is only a very small piece of worm left.
And it is sitting right on the point of the hook.
Desperate for the taste of the once delicious worm, the fish does the one thing he swore he would never be stupid enough to do,
He ignores the risk and goes after the piece of the worm closest to the hook,
He bites down hard.
And gets hooked.
“Don’t Take the Bait”
Is a chapter from the newly released,
“Wrestling Rules for Life”
Always Have the And 1 Attitude
If I were to wish for anything,
I should not wish for wealth or power,
But for an eye that sees the possible.
Soren Kierkegaard
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One can learn a tremendous amount from failure.
And even more from success.
When a wrestler with a 50-1 record is introduced, what does your mind focus on?
Is your mind intimidated by the 50 opponents he beat or does the 1 opponent who beat him give you hope and a plan?
Be attracted to what aids you to be victorious.
Train your mind to think,
“Who was the And 1 and what did he do differently than the other 50 wrestlers who failed in attempting to beat him?”
There was something that the “And 1” did that the others could not.
There was a certain way the “And 1” handled situations that the others did not.
There was some reason the “And 1” ended up on top when the others did not.
Train your eye to find the small details that made the “And 1” different than everyone else.
****
In everything you do in life, there will be 50 reasons why you shouldn’t do it, and one reason why you should.
Always focus on the one reason why you should.
“Always Have the And 1 Attitude”
Is a chapter from the newly released,
“Wrestling Rules for Life”
September 16, 2019
Done Bleeding
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All “Wrestling Rules for Life” pre-orders have been signed, numbered and mailed.
I just want to thank you for your patience and support.
Hemingway said,
“There is nothing to writing.
All you do is sit down and bleed.”
I lost some blood on this one.
The Odds Should be Respected But Never Believed
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Impossible odds
Set the stage
For amazing miracles.
Jentezen Franklin
Never let the odds be a deterrent to the achievement of your dream.
As the odds are just other people’s success rate at what you are looking to accomplish yourself.
They are not your odds.
Understand many others have attempted and failed at what you are trying to accomplish, so you need to respect the difficulty that lies ahead.
Realize, in other people’s failure, they lacked something in their effort, their makeup, their endurance.
That is why they failed.
You need to study and learn from other people’s failures; take and use what worked for them and improve upon what did not.
Find what they were missing.
Perhaps it is something you possess?
Add your uniqueness to the mix, as your uniqueness may be the exact missing ingredient the others did not have and just may have been the reason they did not accomplish the task.
Abraham Lincoln wisely said,
“Always bear in mind that your own resolution to succeed is more important than any other.”
Always remember that the odds to accomplish anything in life are like seeds for a tournament or rankings during the season, they are just somebody else’s opinion of what they think should happen.
Other people’s opinions don’t matter unless you let them.
If you let other people’s opinion throw shade on your vision, your confidence, or your action taking; then their opinion will become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
For them.
Don’t let other people’s opinion carry any weight in your vision.
Your own opinion is the only one that matters.
I have never met a wrestler who was ranked 2nd who didn’t believe he could win a championship.
I have never met an unranked wrestler who didn’t believe he belonged on the rankings board.
This is what drives them to succeed.
The only opinion that truly matters is your own.
****
I have done some research.
I live in Suffolk County, Long Island.
Section XI to be exact.
A hotbed for wrestling.
Section XI has won the New York State Division 1 Wrestling Tournament ten of the past eleven years.
It is wrestling heaven.
Wrestling is taken seriously, here.
It is followed ferociously.
Section XI knows wrestling.
Even with all the passion, all the coverage, all the history, research has shown that the preseason rankings accurately forecast that years
Sectional XI Champions approximately 40% of the time.
That means they are inaccurate 60% of the time.
Always remember the only rankings that truly matter are the results at the end of the season.
Everything else is noise designed to distract you.
“The Odds Should be Respected But Never Believed ”
Is a chapter from the newly released,
“Wrestling Rules for Life”
