Stephen R. Graves's Blog, page 5

The 5 Marks of an Influential Message

If they don’t receive the message, then you haven’t really communicated. My old teacher and mentor Howard Hendricks, always used to say this kind of thing. Good communication is a message both sent and received. 

Messages are everywhere. And they come at us in all kinds of forms. The average American receives between 4,000 and 10,000 ads a day hitting them square between the eyes. It is estimated that between 600,000 and 1,000,000 new books hit the street every year. And just think for a second of the number of podcasts, speeches, classes and YouTube videos pushed every day. Messages are indeed everywhere.

That’s a ton of messaging we’re part of, and I haven’t even mentioned any verbal messages—meetings, conversations, classes, speeches, etc.

Let’s talk about the sender.

Truly important and groundbreaking messages can easily get lost in the tidal wave of messaging. Tom Fishburne calls this “idea camouflage.” Check out his cartoon and blog on the topic here.

There are a lot of remarkable ideas out there that get lost because they look run-of-the-mill. It’s a combination of two needs—the message must be worth telling and it must be told well.

A few years ago, I co-wrote a book called Clout: Tapping Spiritual Wisdom to Become a Person of Influence. In the book, I suggested a five-fold test to make sure the messages you send are meaningful. We’re not looking for flashy and attention grabbing. We’re looking for meaningful.

Here’s the test:

Is the message true? Mark Twain wrote, “All men are liars, partial or hiders of facts, half tellers of truths, shirks, moral sneaks. When a merely honest man appears he is a comet—his fame is eternal—needs no genius, no talent—mere honesty.” Honest messengers stand out.Is the message helpful? In my 30 years of executive coaching, one of the great things I’ve learned is that people don’t want one-liners or general principles. They want help—specific and timely help. I call this “useful strategy.”Is the message inviting? Watch the difference between the economics teacher here and the English teacher in this clip. It’s not hard to figure out which one has the inviting message.Is the message relevant? Most businesses, especially advertising companies, go through a transformation every few years brought about by asking themselves some tough questions: Are we in step with people culturally, socially, and in other ways? Do we need to adapt and adjust our message to changing needs in our audience? These questions must now be answered at warp speed as our culture is constantly shifting. Trending topics on Twitter last hours or days and then they are gone. A message that’s relevant today may be worthless in six months.Is the message clear? St. Augustine told rookie priests that one of the problems of speaking is that the mouth moves at a slower speed than the brain. You have a flash of insight but then you try to explain it and it comes out with far less beauty and clarity than it appears in your mind. Ever had that happen to you? We’ve got to take time to organize our messages in ways that lead recipients at the pace and in the direction we intend. Otherwise, we just lead them in circles.

That’s the five-fold test. Keep in mind, though, that when I say “message,” I’m not simply thinking of someone delivering a TED talk or a commencement speech. 

You deliver messages every day. Yes, in the speeches you give but also in the service you offer to customers, the life you model to your children, the brand marketing you offer to the outside world, the story you tell to potential investors across the table, the way you treat your spouse.

Take a few minutes and jot down the messages you’re sending this week. Then ask yourself these five questions about each message. I’m pretty sure some action points will naturally follow. Anywhere you have a message failing the test, you should consider how to change your message (or your delivery of it).

Influence (or “clout” as I refer to it) is something to be earned and wielded—not just something to be noticed in other people. By shaping our messages, we can have more (and better) clout.

P.S. As a thank-you for subscribing to my blog newsletter, I’d like to give you advanced notice of two small-group classes I’m about to launch. Whether you’re interested in building your own world-class coaching practice or want to make sure you’re focusing on the right things as a senior leader, these live, online workshops are for you. Fill out this brief form to let me know you want to get notified first before info is released to the broader public.

Wanted: A Great Board Chair

Wanted: Intelligent, relational, thick-skinned, kind, and visionary individual to lead organization through trying time while navigating strong personalities and difficult, often conflicting goals.

Who’s in?

That’s essentially the job description for a board chair.

This Harvard Business Review blog describes the best board chairs as judges. It’s an interesting analogy. Find people who are intelligent and with great character and appeal to their desire to do something the right way, whether or not it’s the most profitable way.

That’s what you need in the chairman of the board.

They don’t always grab the most attention, but they keep things moving and increase the organization’s effectiveness and adherence to the vision. There’s a no-nonsense attitude and a mindset of “I’m not on your side and I’m not on the other guy’s side. I’m on the company’s side.”

The size of the job for a board chair varies wildly depending on the size of the organization and what the enterprise is facing. But in nearly every case, the job can be broken down into two sectors: at the meeting and outside the meeting.

At the meeting

There are two big errors board chairs can make at a board meeting: 1). Say too little; 2). Say too much.

I’ll deal with each in turn.

In most cases, the board chair comes to the meeting with the agenda, and the best board chairs get that agenda accomplished. Rabbit conversations are quickly chased back onto the main path. Pet projects are pushed back into the cage. 

Say too little and someone will dominate the meeting. And that’s cardinal rule #1 for a board chair: Don’t let anyone dominate the meetings—even if it’s the confident CEO trying to convince everyone she’s right.

Of course, to do this, you have to be comfortable in your (thick) skin. You’re might hurt some feelings at the meetings, but you have to move through the items of conversation and reach conclusions. Board members need to walk away unified on vision and direction, and executives need to walk away with clear marching orders.  It’s on the board chair to make sure there’s alignment on key strategy and that progress is made.

At the same time, you have to be very careful not to dominate the meeting yourself.  Allow your idea people to express fresh ideas. Encourage the operations people to speak about the day to day. Engage in some relational time. 

The quickest way to make an enemy of the executive is to control the conversation so much that the executive starts fearing you’re planning to hijack or handcuff the company. And remember, being the chairman doesn’t mean you have the most to say or offer.

Outside of the meeting

Above all else, develop great working relationships with the executives and other board members.

This article lists a handful of practical tips for board chairs, including the following:

Don’t surprise the executiveUnderstand the executive’s perspective and preferencesDepend on the executive’s strengths and use themRecognize the executive’s weaknesses and secure resources to assist him/herBe aware of your executive’s hot buttons and pet peeves

In other words, the best board chairs are both a support to the executive and a trusted outside voice. 

Take a few minutes to consider whether you play those roles for the directional leader of the organization. If you criticized the executive’s course of action, would it be taken as a personal affront or as a valuable insight? Is the executive better at his job because of your relationship with him?

As for the other board members, Fast Company has some good tips here including the idea that board chairs should meet with each board member individually during the year.

In addition to working well with others, board chairs need to take the lead on preparing for meetings—getting needed information from executives and pushing issues to board members to consider before the meeting. What things are worth pushing a special email or conference call? The board chair is the one who makes that call. Take the lead in determining the key three or four metrics to discuss at every board meeting.

My friend, Kurt Keilhacker, is the board chair of Praxis. He is the best Board Chair I know or have ever served with. I‘ve heard him say often, “More than anything else, you have to keep an organization viable. The prime directive is to get to the next waypoint in time before the tank is empty. If you can’t do that, every other strategy or tactic is just academic.”

Finding Your Scottie Pippen

During the 1990s there was no sports phenomenon more compelling, or more dominant, than the Michael Jordan-led Chicago Bulls. In a period of eight years—two of which Jordan spent playing baseball poorly—the Bulls won six NBA titles, defeating the likes of Magic Johnson, Charles Barkley, and Karl Malone along the way. If you were to dissect the success of these Bulls teams, your analysis would probably take all of two minutes, and it would begin and end with two words: Michael Jordan. The end. In most minds, you could have surrounded Jordan with four guys from your local rec league and he would have made it work. Sure, he had some talented role players around him at times, but it was all Jordan, right? While there is no denying that Jordan was the clear leader and the most important piece on these teams, there is also no denying that Scottie Pippen was his clear #2. The only player on hand with Jordan for all six titles, Pippen played an invaluable role in Jordan’s success, and is considered by most to be the “NBA’s greatest secondary player” ever. Why, then, is it so easy to overlook the importance of Pippen? Why is it almost natural to gloss over his Hall of Fame career, and go right to Jordan’s accomplishments? In part, it’s because we rarely appreciate, or even acknowledge, the value and rarity of a great #2. In spite of this blind spot, a strong #2 can be as important to your organization as Pippen was to the Bulls of the 1990s. 

#2s in the Marketplace

My first head-on collision with this often overlooked role came early in my executive coaching career when I began work with a gentleman named Carl. At the time, Carl (not his real name) had recently been named the COO of a massive non-profit organization, and he was in the process of navigating the precarious terrain created by a very involved and ever-present founder. In Carl’s situation, just like in Pippen’s, there was no mistaking who the #1 guy was. It was the founder. Carl, though, had an incredibly important role to play as well. He was the right hand for the founder. He was the guy who made things happen. He was the guy who kept the company in balance and on point. He was the guy who took the founder’s vision and interpreted it for the rest of the organization, and he did so magnificently. Unfortunately, not all relationships between the #1 and #2 individuals in an organization are as successful. More often that not, ego, poor communication, and lack of trust doom a potentially successful #2 before he or she even begins. While each situation and organization is certainly unique, I’ve found a few things to be universally true when it comes to #2 assignments.

Trust is preeminent  – The # 1, whether they are the founder, CEO, or president, must have implicit trust in the #2. Not stupid and blind trust, and not begrudging trust, but a trust that keeps the second-guessing of motives and ambitions at bay. If the #1 is constantly looking over his or her shoulder, the roles become counterproductive.Define success – Before the first meeting is held or the first memo is sent, the #1 and the incoming #2 should identify and document what success will look like (both soft and hard elements). Not all #2s have the same roles and responsibilities. In fact, a wonderful Harvard Business Review article identified seven basic roles that a #2 can play. These roles may range from assisting in execution to mentoring key leaders to preparing to take over the reins of the organization. Whatever the role is, the better each party understands it and determines metrics for success, the greater the opportunity for success.Understand organizational context – To truly add value, a #2 must know the vital signs of the organization and understand the motivations behind his or her hiring. Is the company in a growth mode? Are they looking for innovation or execution? Has growth flattened out? Are they looking to streamline or drop dead weight? What challenges are currently demanding attention and what dangers are around the corner?Regularly evaluate and adjust – From day one, the #1 and #2 must set up calendar dates for future evaluations. In Year 1, consider doing a formal review every quarter so that instant pivots and adjustments can be made. In Year 2, space it out a bit, but maintain constant markers to gauge success. For these evaluations to be effective, both parties need to come prepared and ready to talk honestly about what is working well and what is not.Structure for success – This may sound silly. After all, nobody structures for failure, right? While no one intentionally sets up a #2 to fail, it is incumbent upon the #1 to do everything he or she can to create a situation both internally and externally that allows for success.Be realistic – Nearly every #1 I’ve encountered struggles at some point or another to accept the gap between their passion and the passion of EVERYONE else in the company. No matter the title, compensation, or benefits a #1 bestows upon a #2, the latter will rarely have the emotional connection or feel the level of ownership that the owner or founder does.

When to Bring in a Strong #2

When a visionary founder can’t seem to ever get past the exhausting hub and spoke model of leadership … it could be time for a strong #2. When an organization keeps hitting the growth ceiling and bouncing off … it might be time for a strong #2. When your vision has attracted great talent and a devout tribe, but it’s time to deliver on the big vision … it might be time for a strong #2. When a new generation has taken over the key drivers of the company … it might be time for a strong #2. A great #2, whether you call him COO, vice president, chief of staff, executive assistant, staff director, or first mate, may very well be the difference in realizing your vision and spinning your wheels.

Four Questions Before You Invest

What’s worth saying yes to? Every foundation and every venture capital firm have to answer this question on a perpetual basis. So do many people this time of the year facing requests for year-end giving show up in the mailbox or the inbox.

I’ve been asking and answering this question for years. But in the last 3-4 years, I have become clearer than ever where I want to say yes, particularly when it comes to investing.

Over the years, I’ve co-owned several different companies. They all started with me saying yes to some proposition from someone. Figuring out which company to take a chance on isn’t always easy. But having a filter or grid has made the task easier for me. It keeps the yes decision away from impulsive, emotional tugs, or friend pressure.

Unless you are Oprah or Ellen and have a bank of marketing dollars fueling your yes (“You get a car! You get a car! You get a car! Everybody gets a car!”), we need some filter guiding our investment decisions.

I’ve settled on a fourfold filter to guide my personal investment opportunities. I would not dare presume these will fit you, but wanted to share them after a number of you have asked. Here they are:

Is it profitable?Is it scalable?Is it redemptive?Is it healthy?

Now let me be clear. I either need a yes to each question or a clear line of sight on how we are getting to yes for that question. Perhaps my involvement can help get it there – I get that. In other words, your motivation to invest in a company might be so you can make it profitable or healthy. That’s fair. But make sure you have a line of sight on it.

Is It Profitable?

There are times to give money away, no strings attached, but if I’m investing, I’m not trying to give money away. My investment is a means to increase some income eventually.

I’m not alone in this as investors increasingly realize that, contrary to popular wisdom, profitability is more important than growth to last for the long haul.

So I ask hard questions of the companies I am considering investing in. I ask for profit goals, and then dig in to determine whether those profit goals are reasonable or “assuming everything breaks right” goals. I ask about the framework that they have to drive profits and measure results. I’ve run into tons of businesses that can’t miss ideas. Still, they don’t have the back end production plan or distribution plan or employee accountability plan to measure progress and deliver in the long term.

Is It Scalable?

One of the businesses I co-owned faced a crossroads. We had a dynamic leader, but he couldn’t be in all places at once, so we were limited in our growth. He felt the tension, too, and after a long season of considering the options, we made some strategic moves to scale nationally, which meant shifting roles and taking on some additional risk. It hasn’t come without sacrifice, but I will say it’s got a pretty exciting trajectory.

Why is this one of my filters? I understand that not every company is supposed to be scaling right now. But at my age, I don’t have 35 years for a couple of founders to do a bunch of pivots and figure things out. I love the growth that extends our reach, stretches our organizational muscles, and gives us a chance for a timely exit event. So, I need to see the pathway to scale and see it sooner rather than later.

Is It Redemptive?

This question may be a bit unique to me because of the role my faith plays in my life and work.  I want the companies I invest in to have some redemptive edges.

That’s not to say that I expect it always to look the same, but I make sure that company leaders are intentionally asking the question of what makes their enterprise redemptive.

Is it the faith of leadership? Is it the kind of product or service they offer? Is it what they intend to do with their profits? Is it how they treat their employees or customers? Is it the company’s mission and vision? Is it the overt or covert culture of faith?

Do not misunderstand this filter. No two companies look entirely the same regarding this question. There are half a dozen variables that create your unique faith impression. But the companies I invest in must be wrestling with finding their redemptive edges.

Is It Healthy?

When young children are sick, you can tell pretty quickly (whether they voice it or not), and young organizations are no different. For that matter, any age organization can be sick versus healthy. When I consider investing in a company, I’m looking at whether it has a healthy culture and work pace. I’m looking at relationships within the company and specifically between key leaders. I’m looking at whether it is a place of high performance. All of those factors are indicators of health to me.

Patrick Lencioni, in his book, The Advantage: Why Organizational Health Trumps Everything in Business, puts it this way: “An organization has integrity—is healthy—when it is whole, consistent and complete, that is, when its management, operations, strategy, and culture fit together and make sense.”

Conclusion

Again, I don’t expect that a company has figured out everything connected to the four filters. In some ways, if they had, I probably would be coming in too late. But I need to know where they are with these four filters and how they are thinking about them. Your questions may be different than mine, but every investor needs a grid to put opportunities through.

Mine’s just four questions: Is it profitable, is it scalable, is it redemptive, and is it healthy?

The Universal Guide of all Human Services

Any frequent flier knows there’s a spectrum of airplane problems that can occur. On one end is “No peanuts.” That one is mildly disappointing but certainly livable. On the other end is the plane crash. In between is everything from the airline magazine with the Sudoku already filled in to the seatback television that doesn’t work to the aisle seat when the person next to you has to go to the bathroom repeatedly to turbulence to the 45-minute delay to the sitting on the tarmac for two hours without air conditioning before going up and having to reroute to Des Moines … to overnight.

But this blog isn’t about what can go wrong. It’s about how things are handled when they do go wrong.

I was on a flight a few years ago and had used some points to upgrade to better seat options for my family. I wasn’t in first class, but I could see what they were watching on their screens. The people in coach looked longingly at my legroom as they paraded back to 38G and beyond.

The joke was on me, though. My seat wouldn’t recline, the sound system on the television failed, the reading light wouldn’t work, the electric outlet was broken, and the toilet was both broken and stinky. So I couldn’t sleep, read, watch movies, recharge my phone, or breathe.

I did what any self-respecting air traveler would do—I pushed the call light for the flight attendant. A moment later, she arrived and I explained the multitude of issues. Her response blew me away.

“What do you expect me to do?”

I get her point. She’s probably not an electrician or a plumber or an ergonomic engineer. But what did I expect? That she would care. That she would apologize. That she would sympathize with my struggle. That she would maybe even brainstorm an alternative solution, like a different seat or a voucher for something on a future flight.

I wasn’t expecting her to be this engaging, but I did expect that she would act like my problem mattered.

It reminded me of what I call “The Universal Guide of all Human Services.” It looks like this:

Competent but a jerkCompetent and kindIncompetent and a jerkIncompetent but kind

This matrix is like a Swiss Army knife—it applies to every human services work sector: attorneys, bankers, barbers, builders, dentists, doctors, as well as landscape companies, restaurants, retail, phone or internet providers, and policemen, plumbers, mechanics … did I mention airline flight attendants and gate agents?

Think about it with a doctor, for example:

Competent, but a jerk: Provides quality care but you don’t know if she actually cares for you. Bedside manner is really poor.Incompetent and a jerk: Bedside manner is poor and surgery skill is even worse. Avoid at all costs.Incompetent but kind: You walk away from appointments feeling understood but not feeling any better. Your spirits might improve but your sickness worsens.Competent and kind: He listens to your concerns, explains options and procedures, and then, when it’s time to operate or prescribe, he acts with precision and excellence.

In the world of air travel, you’d rather have the flight work and the people not than vice versa, but what you’d really like is for both to be rocking it. You want competence and kindness.

The word “kindness” though, oversimplifies what I mean here. (And yes, I’m critiquing my own matrix here). I’m really advocating for something I call “relational leadership.”

Transactional Leaders

Many leaders are transactional leaders. They’re focused on competency alone. In that mode, people are tools to be used, trophies to be won, mosquitoes to be slapped. I’m focused on the need immediately in front of me and doing what it takes to climb that hill (even if that hill is something like creating a new 5-year strategy). I am on the upper floor directing traffic and moving chess pieces around as needed.

Napoleon said, “One must change one’s tactics every ten years if one wishes to maintain one’s superiority.” Transactional leaders lead this way. They switch from good cop to bad cop; they chase the brightest opportunity while moving away from seemingly less valuable teammates. And they do it all with the goal of maintaining superiority, whether that is personal or corporate superiority.

Relational Leaders

Relational leaders, on the other hand, may likewise change tactics regularly, but they do it with the individual in mind. How will this affect the person? How will this empower the person? How do I communicate with the person? They see individuals as humans.

The filter of the relational leader is, “How would I want someone to handle my wife, my daughter, my son, my sister or brother?” They are thinking long term. How do we build healthy relationships and systems that are mutually beneficial?

Now, to those of you wired to be more transactional, relax. I’m not saying this means you go soft on every customer and subordinate and they get everything they want. I’m saying that you think about the development of people. Use clarity (transactional people love that word) around development goals. Just don’t lose sight that it’s about the person, and avoid practicing favoritism that is really just self-serving.

To those of you who are wired to be more relational, ask yourself whether you’re really trying to grow people and improve systems or whether you just want them to be happy with you. Relational leaders still lead. They lead with accountability, fairness, and equity. They lead while caring.

There’s a stereotype that every successful company has a gun-toting Clint Eastwood who doesn’t put up with any crap. It might be the CEO or it might be another role (COO? HR?), but there’s always somebody.

But the stereotype isn’t true. Companies that are successful over the long haul have leaders who provide clarity to their people for the sake of the people. They may not rescue individuals from every uncomfortable situation (think of a non-reclining seatback), but they don’t cast off that person or ignore their struggles. Because they care about the people, not just the arrival. That’s good leadership.

Autobiographical Theology

We all operate with a framework for navigating life and work. For some it is a well-defined, intentional set of core beliefs and truth. For some it is an ever-evolving bowl of beliefs and experiences. For others, it is just “go with your gut” and make sure you don’t harm anyone … too overtly. But what is the source of said beliefs? Where and how do we construct our moral and wisdom framework for life?

Most of us have no idea how much we are shaped by the music we listen to, the movies we watch, the books and articles we read, the conversations we engage, and our own winding trail of personal experiences. Additionally, most of us have no idea how our much of our beliefs are shaped by our own narrative.

Enter autobiographical theology.

Autobiographical theology is the idea that your own personal experience is the basis for your belief system and over time, your belief system should be prescriptive for other followers of Jesus. Put another way, it’s the idea that your narrative is normative. It is the notion that what you believe is what others should believe. Or until you experience something, it doesn’t really count. As the world turns for you, your thinking shifts and changes.

Let me be clear here: In one sense, the gospel does need to be autobiographical. It needs to be personalized and it needs to affect my life in particular ways. It is supposed to inform and transform my life and work. Until I personally crawl inside the claims of the gospel I will never experience the grace and goodness of God as He intended. But my experience and journey doesn’t determine truth about God and His guidance for me.

I believe it was Francis Schaeffer who first introduced me to the notion of truth being an objective framework that sits above my personal narrative. 

You might be asking “What does it matter?”

I have known pastors who changed their entire view and belief on divorce when one of their children got a divorce. I have a friend who didn’t really “believe” in ministry to the homeless and poor until his wife became close to a homeless story. I have heard countless young entrepreneurs declare how they would build the business if they were in charge and young couples who have no children extol the right school or activity choices for other couples who do have children. And then I have watched those same young parents move and shift once their experience catches up with them and a second or third child breaks their original mold.

We hold views of right, wrong, and personal preference, but then as our life moves … our belief system can also move.

Now this is a tricky thing. Because yes, I am supposed to be growing and maturing and always developing. And yes, many of us have a jumbled hierarchy of beliefs and convictions. And yet, when I make my narrative normative and prescriptive, it makes me short-sighted and judgmental.

A tool I have found helpful is to use what Al Mohler calls “theological triage.”

Want to see a 90 second video description instead? Check it out here.

We are often poor determiners at what is a first-tier issue and what is a second-tier issue. And for sure, the older we get and the more miles we have on life the better we are at knowing the better road to choose.

So, what to do?

Be careful laying down too firm of beliefs outside the center core of the gospel.Don’t live in exclusion and fear but realize the extraordinary persuasion our culture has over our thinking regarding God, people, truth, eternity, purpose, happiness, and faith.Read and digest the Scriptures. Find meaningful and useful ways to engage the Bible. And then keep at it for a lifetime.As you experience life, grow your empathy and understanding for others who hold a different view than you. Speaking of Francis Schaeffer, he also said, “There is nothing more ugly than an orthodoxy without understanding or without compassion.”

Thomas Jefferson said, “In matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock.”

Jefferson and I would have disagreements on some first-tier theological issues, but I think there’s something modeled there that applies in theology. In matters of autobiography, speak with suggestions. In matters of theology, speak with Scripture.

The Dangers of Celebrity-ism

Quick. Name the Christian you admire the most.

Perhaps you said your brother or your grandmother or your early cell group leader. Perhaps like Edith Schaeffer, you consider the question of the greatest Christian and say, “We don’t know her name. She is dying of cancer somewhere in a hospital in India.”

Chances are, though, you thought of someone well known. Pope Francis, Tim Keller, John Piper, Rick Warren, Beth Moore, Matt Chandler, Chris Tomlin.

Our culture is a celebrity-driven culture, and we’re not immune to it in the church or in the wider non-profit world. We notice them, admire them, wonder about their lives, celebrate them. It has its dangers, but it’s unavoidable on some level, I suppose. After all, Jesus Himself dealt with the reality of being a celebrity.

But what if you are one of these people? Or what if you’re part of a church or a non-profit that is led by one of these “celebrities”?

I don’t mean celebrity simply in the Taylor Swift-sense of having millions of Instagram followers. I mean that the brand of the church/organization is inseparable from the personal brand of the leader. It could be a huge, worldwide non-profit or it could be a medium-sized church in a medium-sized town, but the organization seems to “be” the person.

You know when you’re a brand, and your organization knows when you’re a brand. The question is what do you do with it.

As I’ve thought about this topic and my interaction with some personality branded companies and NFPs over the years, I’ve come up with three statements that ring true:

It’s okay to have/be a personality. People with big personalities are not automatically narcissists. They often simply have God-given big personalities. If you’re one of these people, don’t put on false humility (one of the pieces of advice talked about here). Instead, seek to use your personal brand to serve others; the issue becomes stewarding what God has given you and determining who is the center stage of your life.It’s not okay if your personality takes over. Your personality should serve the mission and meaning of your church or non-profit. If you wake up one day and that’s flipped, you’ve made a mistake. When this happens, the leader runs the organization from one ditch to another according to his preferences and passions, and it becomes nearly impossible to transition to the next leader.It’s up to family and friends to keep a personality human. When a leader starts thinking, Nobody gets me. Nobody understands the challenges I face, self-destruction is just around the corner. As the old proverb says, “Better to be known as a sinner than as a hypocrite.” Who are the people who know you as a sinner? Whether you’re a wildly popular blogger or you teach a local Bible study where people ooh and ahh over your insights, you need people close to you to see your faults and keep you grounded. And that’s on both the leader, who’s got to seek it out, and on the friends and family, who have to step up and play that role.

The Dangers of Celebrity-ism

What happens if you get this wrong? There are two main dangers when it comes to celebrity-ism in churches and non-profits.

First, you become blind to your own humanity. We all know stories of the fallen Christian celebrity, the guy we find out who was, on some level, simply playing a part. Celebrities—even Christian ones—often think the rules don’t apply to them.

Second, you fail to collaborate. Collaboration is the structure that usually creates the best, biggest, and healthiest outcomes. In most cases, though, celebrities don’t partner well. Perhaps it’s because they want the credit, defying Harry Truman, who said, “It’s amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.”

Perhaps it’s less egotistical and simply that their voice dominates the room, and they’re surrounded by “yes men.”

Either way, it makes collaboration difficult.

Conclusion

Personal brands are not a new challenge for the church. The apostle Paul wrote to one early church telling them to quit identifying themselves by the leader they followed—whether it was Peter, Apollos, even himself. All of us, he said, are just planters and waterers of a plant that God is growing.

There’s the key: Put yourself in the proper position before God.

John the Baptist said he was a voice in the wilderness. He was just a voice proclaiming something bigger (what Lecrae described as “I can take the background.” We’re supposed to be the reflector and the image of God, not usurp the role of God. That goes for whether we’re big in the eyes of the world or small. It goes for whether we intend to use our influence for selfish ends or unselfish ones.

How do we do that? We acknowledge to ourselves and to others that we’re not the hero of the narrative. The movie’s not really about us. We’re not the protagonists of the story. God is the protagonist, and we’ve got a role to play. Some roles might be slightly more prominent than others, but no matter the role, we don’t get to write the script.

Which means if the script changes, and we get called upon to play a smaller role (or a bigger one), we move forward.

There’s a verse in the book of Psalms where the people say, “Not to us, O Lord, not to us, but to Your name give glory. Because of Your lovingkindness, because of Your truth” (Psalm 115:1). That’s the mental and spiritual posture to have before the Lord.

A Case for Unbundling

“Oh, it’s very simple…”

This is how the character Sheldon, from TV’s Big Bang Theory, begins his nearly incomprehensible explanation of “Rock, Paper, Scissors, Lizard, Spock,” a supposed improvement on a classic game. To Sheldon this all makes sense. Meanwhile, his audience sits by in apparent confused silence. “I’m sorry. Can you repeat that?”

Bundling Up, Stalling Out 

Organizational leaders are often like Sheldon. We take perfectly acceptable, functioning products, services, processes, structures, or offerings and add layers of complexity and functionality. Why do we do that? The reason varies. And sometimes it’s a good idea and sometimes it’s a bad idea. Bundling has its usefulness. But over-bundling can impose dicey unintended handcuffs.

1. We bundle things to gain efficiency or share resources.

You roll two departments into one. You merge two companies. You close offices and centralize personnel. You think, Who needs two accounting departments, two sales teams, or two corporate offices when you could have one? You’re all part of the same big family, so let’s just bundle these functions together.

When we do this, though, we often underestimate the added strain on individuals and departments, and we overestimate the capacity of those individuals and departments. We also tend to overlook the relational and cultural components that may or may not blend seamlessly when things are combined.

2. We bundle things to make the final offering appear more valuable.

You see two parts of your offering, and assume that because they are related they should also be combined.

“If I sell bows, wrapping paper, and cards, shouldn’t I sell them in one package? After all, isn’t that more valuable for the consumer?”

“I do oil changes and wash cars. Shouldn’t I sell these as one combo-offering?”

Maybe. Maybe not. The real question should be, “Does your consumer want this?” Do they want to buy their bows with their wrapping paper packaged together, or is the combined price point too high? Do they want to get their car washed and oil changed in the same visit, or does that take too long and negate your fast service?

3. We bundle things to avoid making a hard decision or having a difficult conversation.

You see a logjam within your organization, and instead of breaking up that jam, you work around it or create a new system to manage the broken system.

The sales team keeps turning in their expense reports late. Instead of finding a way for them to resolve this problem, you make the accounting department responsible for managing when the sales department turns in their reports. Sure, the expense reports will get turned in on time, but you might also have accountants that resent the extra work and a sales department that resents being micromanaged.

4. We bundle things to over-tailor our offering to a key customer, donor, or founder.

You have a key donor or customer who is pushing for a special offering. It doesn’t make long-term sense, but you are so focused on the short-term goal or sale that you just press ahead. Or, because the donor gives so much to the organization, you just can’t say no.

Too often we layer on additional ventures simply because the money seems to point us that way. But we have to discern the difference in short term and long-term funding, real gain and staged gain.

Certainly there are occasions when bundling is helpful. But when you are problem solving, looking for clarity, or sorting out the sequence, unbundling or deconstructing can also be a very useful tool. I use the tool of unbundling every week in my personal life and in helping my clients.

Six Pictures of God’s Kingdom

From time to time, I go back and read one of my favorite parts of the Bible: the parables. These are the very short stories that Jesus told to make a point. Usually, they’re pretty straightforward, such as the parable of the Good Samaritan. The point: Loving your neighbor isn’t that complicated. Take care of the one in need.

In the middle of the book of Matthew, Jesus gets on a bit of a parable roll. He tells six in a row, and they all focus on the same topic: the kingdom of heaven. It’s like he’s holding up a diamond and rotating it bit by bit—as the light hits it from different angles, you notice something new about it.

Keep in mind that this section follows soon after the famous Sermon on the Mount. At that time, Jesus gave his best-known teaching, depicting in living color that God’s kingdom is counterintuitive—upside down. When you get hit, turn the other cheek. Love your enemies. Blessed are those who mourn. Do your good deeds in secret. It’s all in there. One of the big takeaways is that God’s kingdom doesn’t work like those of the world.

Then, a few chapters later in the text, Jesus brings more clarity and dimension to God’s kingdom. He uses stories, parables. For folks like me, that helps.

With that background, let me share at a very high level what I see about God’s kingdom from these six parables in Matthew 13.

1. The Sower: A farmer goes out to plant seed and drops the seeds in four different spots, leading to four different results.

What we learn about the kingdom:

God’s kingdom is not forced upon us, nor does it affect everyone the same way.God’s kingdom must be received and planted into our hearts to take root.The workings of God’s kingdom mysteriously shape people and cultures.

Notice that second one, “God’s kingdom must be received.” Put another way, “I’m not in control.” That’s a tough thing for most leaders to acknowledge, but it’s a reality that shapes how we approach God and his kingdom. We don’t control God’s kingdom; we receive it.

2. Wheat and Weeds: A farmer wakes up one day to find that a rival has sowed weeds all through his wheat crop.

What we learn about the kingdom:

God’s kingdom is mixed in with enemies and fakes.God’s kingdom is not completely revealed till the harvest.

God’s kingdom doesn’t operate on our timing. At any given point in time, you may look around and say, “I’m not exactly sure what God is doing.” If that’s you, you’re in good company.

3. Mustard Seed: A small seed grows into a huge tree.

What we learn about the kingdom:

God’s kingdom starts small but explodes into great influence.God’s kingdom is designed to provide tangible blessings to those in need.

There’s a verse earlier in the Bible that says, “Do not despise the day of small beginnings.” It’s one of the things God does—take things that we would overlook and use them to do his work. The parable of the mustard seed shows just that. The kingdom starts small.

4. Leaven: A woman works some yeast, otherwise known as leaven, into flour, slowly but surely working the yeast into the whole batch.

What we learn about the kingdom:

God’s kingdom has the ability to alter people and cultures.

Os Guinness said, “Jesus made clear that the kingdom of God is organic and not organizational. It grows like a seed and it works like leaven: secretly, invisibly, surprisingly, and irresistibly.” The nature of the leaven is that God’s kingdom works its way through the world and history, and, indeed, it does get all the way through.

5. Hidden Treasure and Priceless Pearl: A man finds a treasure in a field and, seeing its worth, sells everything he has to buy the field and the treasure within.

What we learn about the kingdom:

God’s kingdom must be sacrificially and supremely pursued.

What have I—what have you—sacrificed to gain God’s kingdom? The kingdom may cost a lot, but it is worth far more.

6. The Net: Some fishermen throw their net into the sea and pull up a huge catch of fish. They then sort through the catch to separate the fish that they were actually aiming for.

What we learn about the kingdom:

God’s kingdom is a discerning instrument to filter all of life and work.God’s kingdom does not include everyone.

God’s kingdom involves some discernment. It’s not just an “everybody and everything come on in.” There’s design and purpose to it, which is exactly what we would expect from a God who is both personal and purposeful.

Conclusion

I didn’t pull out the parables to find something to write about. I pulled out the parables to re-anchor my mind and heart toward Jesus.

Might I suggest the same to you? Take a morning this week, grab a Bible (or click here),and read through these parables. Maybe practice that every day for a week. What do you notice? Keep the eleven kingdom insights I highlighted in front of you and personalize the comments.

We’re modern people. We’ve got smartphones and representative government and the periodic table, after all. But I’d assert that we’re not that different than Jesus’ original listeners. Our focus is on today and tomorrow and the years to come and our legacies, perhaps, but most of what we think about is this world, this “kingdom.” Jesus’ original listeners were pretty much the same.

But Jesus says there’s another kingdom that exists at the same time and in the future. Anchoring your mind and heart in God’s kingdom can revolutionize your life and work.

6 Mistakes in Managing High Performers

The mere presence of talent doesn’t guarantee success. In fact, the presence of extraordinary, unprecedented talent doesn’t even guarantee success. If it did, Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen would have won titles with Doug Collins as their coach, and Shaq and Kobe would have won under Del Harris and Kurt Rambis. They didn’t.

They won under Phil Jackson.

They achieved their greatest level of success under the guidance of their greatest manager.

The Headache of High Performers

Where Jackson surpassed his peers was not in his mastery of X’s and O’s—though the triangle offense is a thing of beauty. No, where he was truly exceptional was in his ability to manage high performers.

High performers come in all shapes and sizes. They all have their own quirks and eccentricities, and there is no “one size fits all” model for managing them. They do, however, tend to have a few things in common, things that you must understand in order to lead and manage them well. British explorer and Mount Everest climber George Mallory identified three core characteristics of any high performer:

Inborn Initiative—They are drawn to complete things, to “win.”Positive Perseverance—They are not easily swayed, distracted, or stymied.Superb Skill—They have exceptional abilities in at least one area, and can handle complex tasks and learn quickly.

While your organization may not be home to any elite athletes with multi-million dollar contracts, it should have some high performers.

If you want to be an innovative company, you need innovative people. If you want a flexible company, you need flexible people. If you want a high-performing company, you need high performers.

In theory, high performers are great for the business, but in practice, the benefits can be lost amidst the stress, headaches, and complications. In short, high performers aren’t easy to manage and may require more preparation and care to lead them well.

With that in mind, here are a few mistakes to avoid when leading the high performers in your organization.

Mistake #1:  “High performers need more than busy work.”

High performers are adrenaline junkies, and problem solving is their thrill of choice. That’s when you see their best effort. Stick them with busy work and you’re going to drain their internal battery down to a trickle of self-motivation. You won’t get their best effort.

Mistake #2:  “High performers often struggle with delegation.”

U.S. Senator and university president James Boren once said, “When in doubt, mumble; when in trouble, delegate.” That’s the common stereotype we have of the concept of delegating: it’s a way to get out of work.

But true delegation is not a way to get out of work. Rather, it’s a common-sense strategy to maximize your effectiveness. There are two particular pitfalls in the realm of delegation, and the pitfalls are only magnified when it comes to high performers: “No Delegation” and “Dumping” instead of delegating.

Mistake #3:  “High performers must not be micro-managed.”

The more attached you are to the job or the organization, the more you will want to micro-manage. You hang onto too much control, you give too much instruction, and you want too much information. You give a high performer a project and stay right beside them every step of the way—offering suggestions and critiques. Imagine the infamous Bill Lumbergh from the movie Office Space, and you’ve got your classic micromanager.

Jim Collins said, “The moment you feel the need to tightly manage someone, you’ve made a hiring mistake. The best people don’t need to be over-managed. Guided, taught, led—yes.  But not tightly managed.”

Mistake #4:  “High performers don’t need complete autonomy.”

Great management includes knowing when to take charge and when to let go. It is not always sitting back and staying out of the way.

Let’s face it, high performers don’t ask too many questions. That’s what makes them great—their inborn initiative. They’re driven to excel and to solve the problem. They won’t be the employees coming back every ten minutes and asking for your opinion. They won’t be the kids raising their hands for permission to go to the bathroom. They just go.

But sometimes they should ask questions. That’s life; no one knows everything.  Sometimes problems will arise that are beyond their expertise.

Mistake #5:  “High performers need feedback, even if they resist it.”  

High performers, especially those with past success, rarely seek out feedback. They don’t ask questions because they want to solve the problem themselves. They don’t ask for feedback for the same reason.

Managers can compound this problem. We see that they’re working hard, so we don’t tell them anything. They’re confident. They’re tough. They’ll be fine.

Truth is, they’ll only be fine if you give them feedback. As this Harvard Business Review article points out, “Giving your stars good feedback is essential to keeping them engaged, focused, and motivated.”

Likewise, Kenneth Blanchard says, “Feedback is the breakfast of champions.” And that breakfast has two food groups: specific feedback and strategic feedback.

Specific Feedback:  The more specific the feedback is, the better. One-size-fits-all feedback doesn’t work.  Specificity is the fuel of lasting change.Strategic Feedback:  Webster defines strategic as something which has “great importance within an integrated whole or to a planned effect.”

Of course, feedback isn’t always great fun, particularly with your high performers. But it is crucial.

Mistake #6: “High performers can take the organization hostage.”

You depend on your high performers so much that you are entirely reliant on their performance. What they say goes. And they can evolve into high maintenance prima donnas, nightmares to work with. As the old saying goes, “Can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em.”

You see this a lot in sports. Players start to think they’re bigger than the team. Everything revolves around the high performer.

You Need Them, They Need You

You want high performers. You want your organization to succeed, and they are an indispensable component to that success. Don’t shy away from high performers because of the accompanying challenges. Embrace the challenge.

They also need you. They need to be led, managed, and taught. Their innate skill can only get them so far. To reach their potential, they need thoughtful and challenging managers. Lean in and lead.