Bobby Miller's Blog, page 3

How a filmmaker wrote a novel (and what I'd do differently)

My very first Substack post detailed why I decided to write a novel. But now I want to break down HOW, a lifelong filmmaker, figured out a book. (And also get it published.) I’m going to get into some supremely GEEKY nuts-and-bolts stuff here. My hope is to demystify the process and, hopefully, get you excited about jumping off the book cliff next. All told it took me three years from draft one to acceptance from my indie publisher.

But the big headline is that writing this book was one of the most creative experiences of my life. I want that for you, too!

THE OUTLINE

For years, I’ve written outlines before writing a screenplay. I know some people believe outlining is for cowards. But I need an outline. So honestly, those people can go fuck themselves.

My outlines are roughly 16-22 pages long. They contain brief scene descriptions, bits of dialogue, etc., and are unpolished pieces that no one except me will ever see. In the screenplay world, I knew I had a movie if I had an outline around this length.

I had no idea if that would translate to a book.

I took a leap of faith. Figuring that if I came up short, it would be a novella.

SOFTWARE I USED

I’ve been a fan of Scrivener for years. Whenever I have an idea, I start a Scrivener project file. It does several things I love. First, you can treat it as a filing cabinet. Did you find an article that relates to your book? Drop it in. Have a scrap of dialogue you don’t know what to do with? Throw it in!

It’s also where I write my outline and, eventually, the book itself.

But Scrivener’s killer feature is how it allows you to chop up your manuscript into bits. Chapters, scenes, etc. In doing so, the book becomes “non-linear.” You can drag a chapter behind another one. It also allows you to have tunnel vision. Want to focus on just one chapter? You can.

So much of writing is a mental game you play with yourself. For me, there’s something about editing a chapter in Scrivener that feels less daunting. The weight of the entire manuscript isn’t suffocating you.

I used to use Evernote for general note-taking, but the app has become so bloated that I opted for a newcomer, BEAR. I’ve used it for several years now, and it’s fantastic.

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THE FIRST DRAFT

I knew that coming from feature films, my instincts would probably be overly plotty. I wanted to rewire my brain for the first draft, so I decided not to write with the outline next to me. Instead, I wrote a few choice keywords on a note card: things that needed to happen, vibes. The first had to be exploratory.

At the risk of receiving a wedgie and being thrown into a school locker, I wrote my entire first draft of SITUATION NOWHERE on a freewrite typewriter. Namely the FreeWrite Traveler. This is my preferred version of their devices. (Portable, easy, and I don’t feel like a douchebag using it in a cafe.)

Writing the first draft while also being on baby duty at 3 am.

I made sure to write every day. Sometimes, at bizarre times, in between bottle feedings. But typically, I just woke up early, before the kid and wife were awake. I had minimal time, one hour reliably, and I knew the only way to get through this was to adopt a drafting process that was about moving forward.

Freewrite typewriters are hard to edit on, so part of the philosophy of the device is “flow state.” Always moving forward. With that, I never moved backward in the manuscript. Never used my brain to edit. If I made an error or started a paragraph wrong, I would literally write:

“Actually, this is the start of the paragraph,” and then write it.

To my amazement, I usually had a good chunk of writing done within an hour. Anywhere from 1k-2k words.

From here, it became a simple math calculation: If I could do this for 50 days in a row, I’d have a novel the size of The Great Gatsby. A short novel, mind you, but it’s the fucking Great Gatsby.

Two months.

Two months of putting one foot in front of the other.

Two months of discipline.

By my calculation, that wasn’t THAT different from writing a screenplay.

The novel became less daunting.

Every evening, I would take the raw writing from the Freewrite typewriter and create a chapter or scene within my Scrivener document. I never liked writing at night; my mind always too depleted from the day. But, I found editing at night to kinda work for me.

I wasn’t getting too far into the weeds on this edit pass. Mostly because I just didn’t have enough time. This edit was just about making it readable to me later. Another happy accident to this nighttime approach was that it got the book back into my head before sleeping.

The outline was always there, in the background, something I could utilize if I needed to see the big picture again, but for the most part, I operated with just the current page in front of me. (And that note card.)

Can I be honest? The first draft was a pleasure. I typed and typed and never looked back. Honestly, it was one of the most pleasurable experiences of my creative life. It lasted about three months.

READING THE FIRST DRAFT / DOING THE SECOND DRAFT

This was another story.

I wanted to give myself a month or two before reading the first draft, and I filled that time with other books and writing. I tried to forget I had written the thing.

I finally read that first draft. And brother, it was rough.

I decided now wasn’t the time to get into the weeds on sentences. “Line edits,” as it were. It was about zooming out and figuring out the big picture. I printed the entire manuscript, double-spaced, got out a red pen, and began noting the big stuff.

Some people made fun of me for buying this huge binder but damn it. You gotta do whatever it is that feels good:

I then used this physical copy as my guide through the edits. This is where I finally got into the weeds of prose and style. I don’t recall how long this part took, but I knew this second draft was the one I would share with my wife.

THE THIRD DRAFT

That second draft, the one I finally show someone, is the first true test. I only gave this draft to my wife, but I would probably open it up to more folks in the future.

Based on my wife’s notes, I entered the third draft.

And here’s where I would do something different. I would…

Re-write from scratch.

I read about this in Matt Bell's Refuse to Be Done. Apparently, it’s taught in creative writing classes, but whoops, I never had one of those!

Anyway, after I reread the manuscript and noted any errors, I forced myself to retype everything from scratch. That doesn’t mean typing the thing up from memory, mind you. It means I’m retyping it from the printed manuscript with the notes.

This process is a pain in the ass, but it forces you to re-examine all the words. It’s honestly the BIGGEST game-changer for my writing.

TO RECAP UP TO THIS POINT

The first draft is for just me. The second draft is just for close friends. The third draft that’s rewritten from scratch? I say, share it with strangers at that point. I didn’t do that on Situation Nowhere, but I will on the next one.

But how do you find non-friends to read your book? There are plenty of options, but if you have the cash, Fiverr is pretty great. For a reasonable price, you can get feedback from strangers. Just search for “novel beta readers.” The other cool thing is that I could target different folks—men, women, young, and old—to see how it plays across demographics.

EVERY DRAFT AFTER THIS

I have no idea how many drafts I completed—probably at least a dozen. But I believe that with these above tweaks, I could have reached a draft I’m happy with much sooner.

Listen. We’re just getting started. I have more to say about editing your book, getting it to agents, publishers, and all the rest.

More soon!

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Life During Wartime

I enter this year with mixed feelings. Sure. I want to be more disconnected from the news and social media. Catastrophize less. Build a world for my 4-year-old that feels hopeful and full of possibility.

But, then came the tsunami of headlines.

Never-ending.

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When I speak to most left-leaning folks, the sentiment is pretty clear. Everyone wants to stick their heads in the sand for four years.

And brother, I get it.

Last year, my wife was diagnosed with breast cancer, and in my dealing or not dealing with that information, I slowly developed "TMJ-like symptoms" and ended up in physical therapy. Couple that with a kid, a real-ass job, the desire to write more novels, see friends. Family. It’s…a lot. I’m feeling the head-in-sand bit.

But, I believe there is another path.

It's something I've been doing a lot lately…

I pretend I'm an alien from another planet.

an incredible doodle of mine

It's pretty simple, really. I read the news. All of it. But I read it as if I'm on a distant planet, dispassionate, cold, and disconnected.

My head is not in the sand! Nope!

I'm just a Goddamn alien you guys!

This may sound like a comedy bit. But, I'm telling you, viewing all of this from the cosmos allows me to see the grand absurdity!

And most importantly, I’m not stressed out in front of my kid 24-7. (I’m trying my best not to infect him with anxiety.)

Also: I’m not built for this! I’m not Jesus Christ! Or Superman from that Bryan Singer Superman movie.

You know that part where he goes up into space and gets real stressed out because he can hear everyone’s problems?

Wait, you guys don’t remember that part?

Oh, we don't talk about that Superman anymore.

Got it.

Am I a terrible liberal for feeling this way? Shouldn't I be out on the streets? Yelling about stuff on social media?!! Speaking truth to power!

I dunno. Maybe I am terrible! Or maybe I just want to be like the rest of the country. The one's who vote for the people they want and expect those people to do their jobs. Why do I have to lead a resistance? I can’t even sit comfortably in a chair for too long!

And listen, I have my pet issues. The things that make my blood boil in ways unimaginable. And I'll hit the pavement if need be.

Until then?

I live on a cold distant planet.

I understand Dr. Manhattan is not an alien. But, I’m going for a vibe right now. OKAY, NERDS?!!!

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Things need to change around this house!

Call me crazy, but I don't want to look at my phone while I’m at the urinal anymore.

I don't want to refresh multiple social media accounts for knee-jerk reactions to unread articles.

For chrissake, I’m 42 years old.

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I recently discovered an old podcast from 2009 in which I lamented that social media "was killing me."

I was saying this in 2009??!!! AND I STILL USE IT?

I reasoned, as I still do, that I needed to be on all social media platforms because I was an artist. Not being on social media gave me no voice, no way to "build an audience.”

And while it's heartening to see people leave social media platforms for ideological reasons, my desire to flee was never ideological.

MINE WAS HUMAN!

I think what we’re doing is inhumane!

And yet...I can't leave them.

Not yet! I have a novel that I spent years on. I need to make sure people know it exists. I need to make dumb TikTok videos, goofball posts, anything to get eyeballs.

To be fair, there is part of me that enjoys it. The carnival barker nature of it. Step right up! Let me tell you a tale! It can be fun if you don’t take yourself seriously.

But what’s the long-term cost? I have an outline for my next novel just sitting there. Waiting to dive in. I could be doing that, right?

I’m torn. If I’m not promoting the new novel, what’s the point of a second one?

If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

STILL…

I’ve been complaining about this since 2009!!!

When am I going to shit or get off the pot?

And when I shit, am I going to be staring at my phone still?

For chrissakes!

It's gotta end!

And lord knows I’m trying! I really am!

In March, my light phone should be shipping. And with it, a disconnection from the constant drip feed of content.

That’s a first step, right?

If I can sever this connection in my pocket, maybe I can slowly dissolve the rest of the bonds?

That 2009 podcast also got me thinking of Tumblr and how free and experimental that felt.

I want to get back to that feeling on this Substack! I don't want to write long editorials about something that annoys me! There are plenty of better-written Substacks that do that!

I want to post cartoons, audio snippets, videos, anything. I want this to be experimental, a depository of art and thoughts.

LIKE GARTH BROOKS WISHED FOR!

Eventually, I will quit all of social media. I think!

I’m pretty sure!

By the end of the year I’m going to throw up a graphic that says “FIND ME AT THIS SUBSTACK, PEACE.”

And be done!

Right???

Social media has given me the illusion of many friends, but when push comes to shove, how many of them do I truly have? Maybe, by eliminating social media, I can rebuild the human part of my life?

Or maybe everyone will just be annoyed I’m not on social media and eventually I will feel like I’m missing out?

Listen. I’m trying!

We can keep feeding our humanity into the machine or cut the strings and start over.

I swear to god, I'm cutting the strings!

I swear to God, I’m going to start over!

Once this book is out.

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I love LA

We could have left Los Angeles multiple times during Covid.

A lot of people did.

The city was no fun.

Then there was the social unrest.

Businesses boarded up.

Industries in turmoil.

Sure. We came up with alternative cities.

Other towns to live in.

Canada, even.

But we never pulled the trigger.

I grew up on the East Coast. Went to school in Philly and NYC.

When I moved to Los Angeles in 2010, I was determined not to hate it.

I didn’t want to be another East Coast jerk.

It took a solid year, but one day, I was at Home Depot and ordered a hot dog.

I rolled down my windows and cruised LA.

The palm trees.

The quality of light.

The laid-back vibes.

The hot dog.

Something clicked.

I went to the Dodgers parade last year and was surrounded by people of all stripes.

The city was electric.

Everyone so happy.

It was beautiful.

I always thought it was funny that NYC and San Francisco hate LA…but LA just kind of exists. LA is just happy to be here. Happy to buy you a drink.

The fires raged this week.

Friends have lost their houses.

And like clockwork, the haters come out of the woodwork.

They blame the citizens of Los Angeles for the fires.

Blame DEI initiatives.

Blame smelt?

It all smells like jealousy.

As I watch the footage of my city in flames, I get emotional.

Choked up.

This must be what love feels like.

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Situation Nowhere: The Book Trailer

Hello friends,

First off, I hear you.

What the hell is a book trailer?

Well. Picture a movie trailer…but y’know for a book.

Listen. It’s a thing people do.

The trailer contains clips from films that have inspired SITUATION NOWHERE. I also shot a couple things for the opening that set up the world of the book.

Can you spot all the films I used in this thing?

It was a lot of work, okay?

Anyways:

Pre-order now and get a limited signed edition.

I know the idea of pre-ordering a book is a foreign concept, but it helps give this little indie book some legs before venturing into the cold dark world.

Also! This will be my last “Situation Nowhere”-focused post for a while.

Just know I’m really excited about it!

It’s a funny book to the very last line, and I think it will be a balm for many folks.

OR WILL IT????

Love,

Bobby

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I think the Tyson/Paul Fight made me dumber

I grew up watching boxing with my grandpa. His love of sports—all sports—is still with me. But boxing was a special event. It had to be because it literally cost money to watch on pay-per-view.

I had seen many Mike Tyson fights, including the infamous “ear off.” But, what drew me to boxing was, y’know, the boxing part. Watching two evenly matched fighters square off in the ring. It was violent and elemental.

I tuned in Friday to the Mike Tyson / Jake Paul match, primarily out of morbid curiosity. Here was boxing legend Mike Tyson, aged 58, going up against potentially one of the most annoying YouTube personalities of all time, Jake Paul. A man half his age.

Jake Paul’s entry music was Phil Collins' “In the Air Tonight.” He sat in a lowrider car surrounded by hangers-on, the vehicle slowly (SLOWLY!) inching toward the ring. It was dumb and overly long, but at the same time, I kept thinking, “This will probably be the most spectacle we’ll see tonight.”

I wasn’t wrong.

Mike Tyson came out wearing his trademark black. And he felt utterly alone, isolated from the crowd.

I wasn’t sure if he looked scared or if he just looked…old.

The contrast was striking. YouTuber bombast vs meat and potatoes.

The announcers tried to frame the night’s match, saying that Tyson was wearing a knee brace and that the fight was delayed for health reasons.

That’s when it hit me hard.

Please, Mike. Don’t get hurt.

That feeling continued for all eight rounds.

At one point, the announcers seemed to wince with every blow, the vibe devolving into “Why are we doing this?” and “This is kind of sad.”

Tyson was too old to be in the ring, and Jake knew it. He was clearly holding back.

It wasn’t fun.

I turned off the fight before the decision was called. I felt conned and mad at myself for watching.

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Many believe Jake Paul is a grifter, carefully choosing matches for maximum eyeballs—preordained wins. But one thing’s sure: he’s used the “attention economy” to his advantage. He’s crafted an audience for himself. Jake Paul is a man for this moment.

It’s reported Paul earned 40 million dollars that night. Mike Tyson likely made half that amount.

How many people tuned in to primarily watch Paul is another story.

The live Netflix stream was riddled with problems: poor video quality, freezing, etc. It was a long cry from the pay-per-view cable experience of my youth.

But at least I didn’t have to pay for it, right?

Or maybe.

Just maybe.

We get what we pay for.

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Gen Z & The Problematic Protagonist

I was recently a guest on the Unwatchables podcast, discussing David Cronenberg. One of the young hosts took issue with Goldblum’s character in The Fly, saying that he was a typical self-aggrandizing nerd. While he didn’t use the words “toxic” or “problematic,” the subtext was there.

I had read that Gen Z was more sensitive than previous generations, but this was the first time I was confronted by it directly. We eventually came to a truce, but the issue was on my mind again as I revisited Todd Solondz’s Happiness. (Now on Criterion 4k.)

Happiness was an important movie for me in college. My first film professor recommended it to me after watching one of my shorts. As a kid raised on mainstream comedies, the film was a shock to my system.

I’ll never forget renting it and returning to class the following week.

“What did you think?” my professor asked.
”Well,” I said quietly, “I’m not sure if I should admit to this, but I really liked it.”

Todd Solondz ended up being a seismic force in my life. His films gave me the courage to be weird and dark. But there’s also an empathy, a nonjudgmental quality I admire. It’s sometimes at odds with the comedy, but that makes it all the more interesting.

Honestly, I’m not sure my short TUB exists if I didn’t see Phillip Seymore Hoffman do…that.

Watching the film again, I realized that Solondz’s influence is still in my bloodstream. My book Situation Nowhere features a cast of characters known as “The Brotherhood of the Resigned”—people who’ve been “canceled” and now live underground as social pariahs. They’re funny, tragic, and problematic, and readers across the board have loved them. I have Todd Solondz to thank.

There’s been so many think pieces about the sensitivity of younger generations. And yeah, sometimes I’m guilty of wanting to say, “Get off my lawn!” But, ultimately, who cares? Stoking artificial conflicts between generations feels so petty and exhausting.

Sure. Maybe a new generation might be repelled by Solondz. Or even Cronenberg.

But isn’t that great? Isn’t it wonderful to re-evaluate and discuss an artist’s work?

At the end of the day, isn’t that conversation the whole point?

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My dinner with Courtney Love

One of the biggest thrills of my life was when the script for my first feature film, "The Cleanse,” started making the rounds with actors. For years, I had tried to make the film, and suddenly, agencies were hip to the movie and excited to give their clients my script. I met with many actors, 99% of whom I was aware of. But some were slipped “The Cleanse” without my knowledge.

Courtney Love was one of them.

Now listen, I’m a Courtney Love fan. But I’ve read enough stories about her to know she might be…prickly. The movie was ambitious, with lots of practical effects, and the last thing I needed was a difficult actor.

Still, I wouldn’t turn down a chance to have dinner with her.

Johnny Galecki, the movie’s lead, joined me, and we met her at a closed restaurant somewhere near Beverly Hills. I'm not sure why the place was closed or if this was just something famous people did, but no one was there except for me, Courtney Love, and Johnny Galecki.

The weird thing about our meeting was that…she never acknowledged me. She only spoke to Johnny. This continued for thirty minutes as I shrunk into the background. I have no idea why she did this. Maybe she thought I was Johnny’s assistant?

Johnny, being a mensch, kept trying to bring me into the conversation.

"Well, you know, Bobby wrote the script," he'd say.

Nothing.

“Oh, you know, Bobby’s directing this.”

Nah, dude.

The prompts never worked, and you know what? It’s fine! Instead, Courtney delighted us with Hollywood gossip. Gossip about ex-boyfriends, family members, friends, nothing was off-limits. She was an open book. And so goddamn entertaining.

At a certain point, she wanted to head outside to a nearby alley. Johnny and her chain-smoked while she regaled us with a story about Fight Club. She was apparently cast in the film but punched David Fincher and lost the job.

I wasn’t sure why she was telling me this story. The last thing I needed was for an actress to take a swing at me. I have my own problems! But then it began to dawn on me that maybe this wasn’t about making my movie. It was just about hanging out.

I loosened up.

We returned to our table, and Courtney, now realizing I existed in the world, turned to me and asked, with all sincerity, if I had spoken to Warren.

"Warren?" I asked.

Johnny's agent's name was Warren, so I thought she was referencing him.

"Warren Beatty," she clarified.

I almost did a spit-take. This was the most hilarious thing I’ve ever heard in my life. But her eyes were trained on me. She was serious.

"Oh, uh, no, I've never met Warren Beatty," I said.

"Oh," she replied, disappointed. "Warren calls all the men in Hollywood. You gotta get the Warren call.”

“Huh.”

She stared off. “It’s like your official initiation into Hollywood. A rite of passage for up-and-coming men.”

We finished our meal, and I honestly forget if we ever really talked about the script—the script that was slipped to her by some unknown entity.

Afterward, Johnny and I went for a walk. We were quiet for a bit. Processing all of the Hollywood gossip and her casual mentions of Kurt Cobain as if his passing had happened months ago.

Finally, he turned to me and said, "Well. Fuck. I've been in this business since I was a little kid and never got the Warren Beatty call!"

We laughed.

Anjelica Huston ended up with the role. Thankfully, she never took a swing at me.

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All Situation Nowhere pre-orders get a signed bookplate!

Guys!

I convinced Maudlin House to do something special for anyone following this Substack. If you pre-order my book SITUATION NOWHERE through their site by March 2025, you’ll get an autographed bookplate by yours truly.

Also, I don’t reveal this in the video above. But, the bookplate will include new exclusive artwork by Philip Vose.

Philip doing the art is extra special for me. At his art show in 2021, I decided to write the book.

NOTE: This is a pre-order-only thing. If you wait until March to buy it, you’re shit out of luck! Also: If you already pre-ordered, fear not! You’ll get the limited bookplate, too.

Pre-Order my debut novel, Situation Nowhere

PRE-ORDER at SituationNowhere.com

Friends!

The early reviews are in and people like my book!

Even better, you can pre-order it TODAY.

Head on over to SituationNowhere.com for the full synopsis and pre-order. Cover art by Alexander Naughton.

I’ll have plenty more to say as the release date approaches, but in the meantime, here are some blurbs from people who have read the book!

“Part speculative dystopia, part laugh-out-loud comedy, Situation Nowhere is a fantastic read! Bobby Miller has a big, sick, glorious imagination and you will love this Energoo of a book.”
— Rainn Wilson - Actor, Author

"If you're like me, and find Idiocracy to be a more accurate depiction of where we're headed than let's say 1984 or Brave New World, this book is for you! Bobby Miller nails the gallows humor of a rotting, stupid world. Hilarious and sympathetic, this book is hard to put down!"
— Kent Osborne, Head Writer of Adventure Time

“Situation Nowhere is a clever, dark, and often hilarious adventure through the most frustrating and endearing parts of humanity. In this fast-paced thrill of a book, you may not always know whether to scream at protagonist Lauren or with her, but there's no way you won't want to find out what happens to her next; and, possibly, question your own morals as you navigate a world of corporations, CEOs, and ethical dilemmas not all that far-fetched from our possible future. If the practice of laughing at your problems until they either go away or eat you alive took literary form, this is it.”
— Alex Woodroe, Author of Whisperwood

“Situation Nowhere is the perfect read for anyone who’s ever dreamt of being a badass boss bitch or lived in fear of getting X-ed. Bobby Miller captures the paranoid, powerless chaos that makes our world feel like it’s teetering on the edge. Sharp, biting, hilarious. I couldn’t put it down.”
— Jack Allison, Author of Kill The Rich

“A sharp, hilarious, and witty satire that tackles AI, cancel culture, and poisonous celebrity-backed soft drinks! A perfect encapsulation of where we are and where we are headed in the world unless we take “Situation Nowhere’s” warning immediately!”
— Jordan VanDina, Writer of The Binge

“Situation Nowhere feels like a postmodern Truman Show made by Odenkirk and David Cross. What scared me most was how quickly the absurdity of it started to feel normal. Everyone go buy this book and read it before the world ends.”
— Alex Dobrenko, Writer of Both Are True

More soon!

<3

Bobby

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