Rita Wilkins's Blog, page 28

Why Decluttering Isn’t The Same For Everyone

Do You Want To Learn How To Declutter? 

A cluttered home is often a home that causes stress. Wouldn’t you like to feel more at ease in your home? Would you like to get rid of the clutter, but aren’t sure how to begin decluttering? Good news – the help you need is available here. 

Hi, Rita here. The Downsizing Designer is here to support you on your decluttering journey. Don’t live with unwanted clutter. When you downsize and declutter you’ll have more money, time, and freedom to do what you want, when you want. I’m here to teach you useful minimalist tips, decluttering tricks, and more. 

Decluttering Isn’t The Same For Everyone 

It’s first important to dispel the myth that everyone can declutter in the same way. There is no one-size-fits-all approach to decluttering. After all, decluttering can be a deeply personal process. You’re going through items that you may have fond memories attached to – or perhaps even items that have been in your family for a while. As you’re on your decluttering journey, you have to find the decluttering method that is right for you. 

What’s My Decluttering Method? 

I’m offering online decluttering courses to help you figure out your decluttering method. Currently, I offer 9 online decluttering courses. Here’s a peek at three of my most popular decluttering methods: 

The ABC Decluttering Method – Mind your ABCs! Categorize items as you go through them to help you declutter. The Burst Decluttering Method – Work with the time and energy you have! Learn how to declutter in bursts. The Room-by-Room Method – Narrow your focus! Choose to work through one room at a time. 

If any of these methods sound like the right method for you, take my online course now! 

Rita Wilkins Offers Lifestyle Design And Interior Design Services  

Do you want to learn more about downsizing and decluttering? Call Design Services LTD at 302-475-5663 to discuss your design needs. You can also connect with me by following me on Facebook and LinkedIn. Would you like complimentary advice from the downsizing designer? You can schedule a complimentary 30-minute call with me today. My book Downsize Your Life, Upgrade Your Lifestyle: Secrets to More Time, Money, and Freedom is now available in paperback, audio, and on Kindle! Get your copy soon. 

The post Why Decluttering Isn’t The Same For Everyone  first appeared on Design Services LTD.

Help! I Want to Declutter but My Spouse Doesn’t!

By Rita Wilkins
The Downsizing Designer

Does this sound familiar? You are dying to declutter your home because the clutter is driving you crazy but your spouse or significant other is not on board.

It’s been building up for months or perhaps for even years. The messes are everywhere and it’s just getting worse.

It’s affecting you, your relationship with your spouse, and your family.

You’re at a stalemate. You’re stuck because it has become such a touchy subject that you avoid talking about it altogether.

If this sounds like you, I encourage you to address the elephant in the room… address, it head-on before it escalates and causes further animosity in your family.

For almost 40 years as an interior designer, and now as the “Downsizing Designer,” I’ve often been in the middle of many such disputes and disagreements. Frankly, I’ve come to embrace these challenges as the neutral third party because I have developed a method to help them find common ground.

And… if you follow the simple guidelines, I’ve used successfully for many years, you and your spouse will also be able to move beyond the emotions associated with decluttering so that together, you can find a mutually agreed-upon path forward. 

Get your FREE downloadable PDF by simply
SIGNING UP for our NEWSLETTER.Decluttering? 4 steps to get your spouse on board 1. Acknowledge the elephant in the room.

Acknowledge the conflict, that you’re not seeing eye-to-eye about clutter, that the issue between you is getting worse and can’t be ignored any longer. If you want to get your spouse on board, it all starts with good communication.

2. Set the stage for open and honest conversation.

Schedule a time, date, and quiet place to meet to discuss this issue.

Structure the meeting such that each has an opportunity to share their thoughts without interruption. Establish that there will be no arguing, just listening.

During that meeting, discuss each needs to answer the following questions:

What’s the source of the conflict?

Examples:

She: She wants to declutter and restore their home to the beautiful calm, peaceful house that it was when they first moved in.He: He doesn’t care, he doesn’t even see the clutter and it doesn’t bother him. He likes the house just the way that it is. Why does it matter that she wants to declutter and he doesn’t?

Examples:

She: The amount of clutter is causing her to be overwhelmed, stressed, frustrated, upset, and embarrassed.He: He doesn’t care about the clutter because he doesn’t really see it the way she does.She: She is frustrated because she can’t find what she wants when she needs it. She’s wasting her time and energy because the clutter is out of control.He: He doesn’t want to declutter, because it’s too much work, takes too much time, and he’s too busy. Besides, the project it’s just overwhelming.She: She has become resentful feeling alone, and gets frustrated and angry because she cannot do it all herself.He: He would feel guilty letting things go things that have been given to him or things that he’s inherited which he is not willing to go through difficult emotions.She: She wants a calm, peaceful, happy home, where she can focus and be productive.He: He is concerned that he will regret giving things away if he makes the wrong decision.She: She wants more time together with her spouse, friends, and family. She feels she spends so much time decluttering, and there’s no time left for time together.He: He is afraid of losing the memories if he gives away the family’s “stuff.” He’s much more sentimental than he lets on to be.3. Compromise, collaborate, and offer solutions 

Examples:

She: Now that she understands his emotions around letting go, they can work on an emotional area together. (Kitchen cabinets, pantry)He: Now that he understands why decluttering is so important to her, he will not keep making it such a big issue and will cooperate by helping her 3 to 4 hours a week.She: She will declutter her stuff only, not his, and she will continue decluttering one room, one area at a time.He: He will schedule 3 to 4 hours per week to work on his stuff only. This will allow him to manage his time while helping her declutter their home when room, and one area at that time.She: She will include him in the decluttering process by discussing what she is disposing of and donating beforehand. This will let him feel like he has more of a say in the process.He: He just stop second-guessing her every step of the way. Instead, they come out to gather and decide what your discretion to donate.She: She will not nag him about clutter now that they are working together and feels that they are collaborating on a common goal.He: He will stop being a naysayer now that they are working together on a common goalShe: She will stop buying more and adding to the clutter.He: He will also stop buying in more stuff and contributing to the clutter.4. Keep the conversation alive.

When you get stuck, feel, overwhelmed, and upset, talk about it, and remember to respect each other’s opinions and feelings.

Request for help. Ask for what you want and need. Offer solutions and agree on the solution.

If emotions rise up take a break and forget about decluttering for a while. Go out to dinner, have a glass of wine, and laugh about it.

Nothing is more important than your relationship.

Take time for each other and learn to have fun decluttering together.

Communicate, compromise, and collaborate!

You will discover that the decluttering process can actually be fun and mutually beneficial when you are both on board.

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Most Popular Methods For Decluttering

How Do I Know How To Start Decluttering? 

Decluttering can seem like a difficult project – especially if you don’t know how to start. It is important, however, to prioritize decluttering because it will allow you to feel more at ease in your home and to live your life more freely. You don’t have to learn how to start decluttering on your own. 

Hello again – it’s Rita. When you’re ready to get started decluttering, I’m here to help. The Downsizing Designer has something for everyone – including minimalist checklists, decluttering worksheets, and much more. Let’s take the first steps toward starting your decluttering journey today. 

What Are The Most Popular Methods For Decluttering? 

It may surprise you to learn that decluttering doesn’t have to be done any one particular way. In fact, many decluttering methods can help you achieve a minimalist style. The key is to choose the method that is right for you. Most people use the three most popular decluttering methods: The ABC Decluttering Method, The Burst Decluttering Method, and The Room-by-Room Decluttering Method. 

How Do These Methods Work? 

The best approach to decluttering is a structured, simple method. All of the methods above have both of these qualities but also work best for people with different priorities. 

For example, in the ABC Decluttering Method, you focus on the items you’re going through as you declutter your home. You arrange them into categories of your choosing based on if you want to keep the items, don’t want to keep them, may want to keep them, etc. 

The Burst Decluttering Method, on the other hand, works for people who feel more limited in energy and time. You can approach decluttering in structured “bursts.” 

Do you concentrate better if you can focus on one area at a time? If so, the Room-by-Room Method may be the best choice for you. 

Of course, one of my other decluttering methods may be the best choice for you. Take a look at the other decluttering courses I have available now. 

Rita Wilkins Offers Lifestyle Design And Interior Design Services  

Do you want to learn more about downsizing and decluttering? Call Design Services LTD at 302-475-5663 to discuss your design needs. You can also connect with me by following me on Facebook and LinkedIn. Would you like complimentary advice from the downsizing designer? You can schedule a complimentary 30-minute call with me today. My book Downsize Your Life, Upgrade Your Lifestyle: Secrets to More Time, Money, and Freedom is now available in paperback, audio, and on Kindle! Get your copy soon. 

The post Most Popular Methods For Decluttering  first appeared on Design Services LTD.

Prepare For The Future With Decluttering

Decluttering Helps You Prepare For The Future 

Do you look around your home and realize a lifetime’s worth of clutter has built up? Are you preparing to simplify your life through downsizing? Do you need to learn how to get started decluttering so you can live a life with more money, time, and freedom to do what you want? If so – I can help! 

Hi, all! Rita here – your Downsizing Designer. No one wants to live with unwanted clutter – nor do you want to leave your children or your spouse to deal with an excess of clutter when you’re gone. The best way to prepare for the future and to more fully enjoy your life now is to get started decluttering now. 

Decluttering Doesn’t Have To Be Difficult 

You may not know how to get started decluttering now. The good news is it doesn’t have to be a difficult task – nor do you have to accomplish it on your own! As your guide to decluttering, I offer minimalist checklists, decluttering worksheets, and more to help you learn how to declutter. 

Pick The Decluttering Method That Suits you Best 

Decluttering isn’t a one-size-fits-all type of journey. The key to successfully decluttering – both in getting started decluttering and staying motivated to declutter – is to choose the decluttering method that is right for you. Consider our more popular decluttering methods: 

Rita’s ABD Decluttering Method – Categorize items by if you want to keep them, get rid of them, fix them, etc. Rita’s Burst Decluttering Method – Decide an amount of time to dedicate to bursts of decluttering. Rita’s Room-by-Room Method – Declutter your home one room at a time. 

Learn more about how to get started decluttering today! Choose one of the online decluttering courses above or browse my other decluttering courses. 

Rita Wilkins Offers Lifestyle Design And Interior Design Services  

Do you want to learn more about downsizing and decluttering? Call Design Services LTD at 302-475-5663 to discuss your design needs. You can also connect with me by following me on Facebook and LinkedIn. Would you like complimentary advice from the downsizing designer? You can schedule a complimentary 30-minute call with me today. My book Downsize Your Life, Upgrade Your Lifestyle: Secrets to More Time, Money, and Freedom is now available in paperback, audio, and on Kindle! Get your copy soon. 

The post Prepare For The Future With Decluttering  first appeared on Design Services LTD.

How To Prevent These 3 Biggest Mistakes If You’re Downsizing in Your 60s

By Rita Wilkins
The Downsizing Designer

There are 3 main reasons baby boomers decide to downsize to a smaller, more manageable, and affordable home.

1.    Reduce expenses

Many baby boomers who are either retired or approaching retirement and who might be on a fixed income are concerned that they will no longer be able to afford the expense and upkeep of their large homes.

2.    Mobility and health concerns

While they might still be experiencing good health, they are anticipating the possibility of declining health and mobility as they age, preventing them from maneuvering stairs and caring for a larger home.

3.    Lifestyle

At this stage of life, they want to enjoy life as much as they can for as long as they can. A smaller home with less stuff gives them more time, money, and freedom to live their best life right now.

Then, once they make the decision to downsize, they are suddenly faced with a plethora of additional decisions that need to be made:

When to downsize?Where will they live?What kind of lifestyle do they want?What to do with all their stuff?

No wonder they get overwhelmed and anxious when they even think about downsizing!

No wonder many baby boomers make these big and costly mistakes.

AVAILABLE ON AMAZON!The 3 biggest mistakes baby boomers make when downsizing and how to prevent them:#1 BIGGEST MISTAKE: Playing the Waiting GameWaiting to get the best possible price for your house.Waiting to do research and due diligence for affordable options where you might want to live and the type of lifestyle you want.Waiting until something happens. A serious fall, heart, attack, or accident could change everything, giving you fewer choices.How to prevent this big mistake:Don’t wait until it’s too late

With the housing market being so unpredictable and with fewer available affordable housing options, not having a vision and plan for the kind of lifestyle you want sets you up for failure.

Don’t wait and procrastinate until downsizing becomes a necessity.

Start planning your decluttering and downsizing journey today. 

#2 BIGGEST MISTAKE: Rushing the ProcessWaiting until the last minute definitely has its consequences.

Rushing the process forces you to make important life-changing decisions under pressure about where you want to live and the kind of lifestyle you want.

Rushing to declutter and prepare your house for sale causes undue pressure. Mistakes are more likely to be made under these conditions. As an example, throwing too much away. Had you been more mindful and had you taken your time with the process, you might have given more things to your loved ones who wanted or needed them.

Panic sets in, often resulting in no decision at all, thereby, packing it all up and taking it with you to your new smaller home.

How to prevent this big mistake:Decluttering and downsizing takes time. Start before you have to. Allow at least six months.

Take time to research where you want to live and the kind of lifestyle you want to live.

Take time to declutter, dispose of, and donate things you don’t want, don’t need, or won’t use.

Make sure to involve your kids and loved ones in the process. This will prevent you from giving things away they might want, need, and use.

Declutter one room at a time. Enjoy the process. It’s cathartic. 

#3 BIGGEST MISTAKE: Not Downsizing Enough/ Double Downsizing This is a very costly mistake! Not just in dollars but also in time and energy.

If you have been living in a large home, it might be difficult for you to imagine yourself living in a much smaller home, so you might decide to downsize a little

… but not enough!

Then, in a few years, you might find yourself having to downsize again!

Not downsizing enough also happens when you are so attached to your stuff that you can’t let it go so you bring it all with you… all of it! When all of your stuff gets to your new much smaller home, your home is overwhelmed with too much stuff and you have to declutter again!

How to prevent this big mistake:

If you have done your research and created a vision for a simpler lifestyle you really want.

If you have selected a home that suits your lifestyle now based on your wants, needs, and wish list, you can avoid this costly double downsizing mistake.

Baby boomers, if you are thinking about downsizing, please watch this video, and read this blog. It will be time well spent.

SUBSCRIBE NOW!The post How To Prevent These 3 Biggest Mistakes If You’re Downsizing in Your 60s first appeared on Design Services LTD.

DECLUTTERING? 10 EASY STEPS TO GET STARTED AND STAY MOTIVATED

BY RITA WILKINS FEBRUARY 17, 2023 LIFESTYLE

Do you know what is the # 1 challenge people face when decluttering their home? Getting started.

How about the # 2 challenge people face when decluttering their home? Well, that would be staying motivated.

Congratulations if you found the courage to take those first steps to start decluttering your home so that:

Your kids won’t have to clean out your home when you’re gone.You can prepare for a new life and starting over when you retire.You can finally start to enjoy a simpler life with less stuff and less clutter.

Think of it this way:

You were successful at starting your decluttering journey because you took the time to create a vision for the life you want after you’ve decluttered.You also took the time to create a decluttering plan, and a timeline to accomplish your goals.You already started to see the fruits of your efforts in the areas you’ve decluttered.

You were on a roll! WERE on a roll… past tense!

Losing Motivation

What happened to your motivation and that strong, seemingly unstoppable drive to declutter your home once and for all?

Why are you suddenly resisting, procrastinating, and finding every imaginable excuse not to dedicate your time to decluttering?

Why did your “can do” mindset revert back to the old “can’t do” way of thinking?

What you may not have anticipated or planned for was the possibility that at some point you might hit roadblocks, lose momentum, and experience bouts of self-doubt.

Having tried and failed many times before, you truly believed that this time you could do it!

And the fact of the matter is, you did accomplish quite a bit of your decluttering… you are halfway there!

But when self-doubt and negative self-talk started, you got overwhelmed again at the daunting task you still had ahead of you. Even the best laid plans and aspirations of a clutter-free home now seem like a distant dream.

The Messy Middle

If this has happened to you, know that you are not alone. As a matter of fact, I would venture to say it happens to all of us at one time or another because the “messy middle” is where the going gets tough.

We’re human.

We lose that initial excitement, enthusiasm, and drive to reach the finish line.

We stop telling ourselves we can, and instead, begin telling ourselves, “We can’t,” “It’s too hard,” or “It’s impossible” – and then, we quit.

When you think about it, this same mind game of “can” and “can’t” applies to just about anything else in life, we try to accomplish, be it losing weight, learning a new skill, or training for a marathon.

Getting Stuck Happens to All of Us

It’s not unusual to take one step forward, and then two steps back. So how DO you pick yourself up and dust yourself off, so you can start all over again?

Why WOULD you stop now if you are already halfway there… or even a tenth of the way there?

Theodore Roosevelt once said, “If you believe you can, you’re halfway there!”

The first step to achieving a goal is to start believing you can succeed. So, if you are truly committed to accomplishing your decluttering goals, and if you truly want to re-ignite that fire, your drive, and your determination to succeed, follow these 10 simple steps.

10 Simple Steps to Get Started and Stay Motivated on Your Decluttering Journey1. Deeply Connect with Why You Want to Declutter

What is the main reason you want to declutter your home? This reason goes deep to your core… it can even make you cry.

Examples:

You don’t want to leave your kids with the enormous emotional task of cleaning out your stuff when you pass away like you had to go through when your parents died.You dream of a new “lighter” lifestyle when you retire, one that won’t weigh you down, one that lets you experience a freedom you haven’t known in years… and one that gives you more flexibility, mobility, and much less responsibility.2. Recommit to Your Vision for Life After Decluttering

Take time to create a vision board that paints a vivid picture of what your life will be like once you are free of clutter.

Be specific. Put it in a place where you see it each morning, let it inspire you, and get you excited about the new lifestyle you will have.

Examples:

More time, energy, and freedom to start checking off adventures on your bucket list with your spouse, your significant other, or your girlfriends.Weekly play dates with your grandchildren while they are still young enough to enjoy being with you.3. Acknowledge You Got Off Track

Admit that you’ve lost enthusiasm, but you don’t want it to impact your decluttering goals. Identify one or two things that might have contributed to getting off track.

Examples:

The emotional impact of decluttering family photos.The physical exhaustion, trying to do it yourself.The negative feedback from family and friends.4. Celebrate Your Wins Both Big and Small

Acknowledge yourself for the progress you’ve made even if it feels like a drop in the bucket. Reminding yourself of those “wins” will inspire you and motivate you to get started once again.

Take time to recall what worked before, and why you were able to accomplish your goal of decluttering in at least a few of the areas before you got stuck.

Example:

Was there a specific decluttering method that you were able to fit into your daily routine? For example, the burst method might have allowed you to accomplish 15 to 30 minutes of decluttering each day.

If you’re looking for decluttering advice, subscribe to  Rita’s YouTube Channel  where she shares tips and best decluttering practices!

5. Identify When You Started to Lose Interest in Decluttering and When You Began to Get Off Track

Examples;

Naysayers

People in your life who discouraged you and did not support you in achieving your decluttering goals.

Emotional Triggers

Things that triggered strong emotions and memories, both good and bad, that took you out of the game (family photos, love letters, deceased spouse’s clothing).

Distractions

Devices or technology that took your attention away from decluttering, causing you to lose focus, stole time from the task at hand, and negatively impacted your momentum and productivity (social media, the Internet, phone calls).

6. Have a Step-By-Step Plan in Place for Overcoming Obstacles and Setbacks When They Occur

Create a plan that includes the following:

Review your vision board and goals daily.Remind yourself of why decluttering matters so much to you.Reduce overwhelm by calling a friend who supports you, and take a weekend off from decluttering.Start by decluttering a small but high-impact area that bothers you the most.Embrace imperfection. Decluttering is messy, not perfect.Alternate decluttering methods. (Burst method, category, method, room by room method.)Track weekly progress, take “before” and “after” pictures.Score quick wins. (One shelf, one drawer, one closet.)

Take care of yourself, smile, and try to enjoy the journey!

7. Reframe Your Thinking from “Can’t” to “Can”

Identify your negative self-talk patterns: “I can’t. I’ll just fail again. It’s too hard!”

Every time you hear yourself being negative, smack it back down like a “Whack Amole.” Immediately reframe those negative thoughts into positive and useful thoughts, such as “I can succeed. I will succeed. I want this so badly that it’s worth the hard work.”

Take a deep breath each time you hear something negative. Break the cycle of negative self-talk by being patient with yourself. It takes time. Doing this will eventually become a habit, so you will no longer be controlled by negative thoughts that take you off track.

8. Surround Yourself with People Who Believe in You and Will Support You

Engage a team of people who will be accountability partners, who will support you in good times and in bad, and who will help you stay on track. They will be there to celebrate your wins and help you get back in the game when you face setbacks.

9. Stay in the Moment

Focus on the one thing that you are working on right now. (One drawer, one shelf, one closet.) Complete that task before moving onto the next. Progress begets progress.

10. Have Some Fun While You Are Decluttering

Yes, decluttering is hard work both physically and mentally, but clutter didn’t accumulate overnight, so it’s not going away overnight. It’s a journey that will take time. Discover ways to have fun along the way.

Examples:

Invite a few friends over for a decluttering party. Work for a few hours, then enjoy a nice dinner and wine together. Share funny stories about the process.Have fun watching things disappear from your driveway when you put a large “FREE STUFF” sign next to your discarded items.Play your favorite music, listen to an audiobook, or enjoy a podcast you’ve been waiting to listen to. Learn and have fun while you declutter.

If you have tried to declutter your home, but got off track, and if you’ve lost that energy and motivation to go the distance, don’t give up.

Start believing you can and you’re halfway there!

As challenging as the decluttering journey might be, you will learn so much about yourself along the way, and when you look back, you’ll say it was worth every minute!

Your thoughts?

Have you strayed from your decluttering plan? What caused you to lose drive? Are you prepared to continue your journey toward a clutter-free life?

SUBSCRIBE NOW!The post DECLUTTERING? 10 EASY STEPS TO GET STARTED AND STAY MOTIVATED first appeared on Design Services LTD.

Decluttering Makes Life Easy For You – And Your Family!

You Don’t Have To Live With Clutter – Get Started Decluttering Now! 

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by clutter, it’s time to make a change. Learn how to start decluttering now. Decluttering your home will make it a safer, cleaner, and more enjoyable environment for you. Decluttering now also means you won’t leave your family to deal with the clutter when you’re gone. Get ready to live your best life – a minimalist life – when you learn how to declutter. 

Hi, everyone – Rita here. As the Downsizing Designer, I’ve spent my career teaching the benefits of decluttering and helping people learn how to get started decluttering. Whether you want to achieve a more minimalist sense of style in your home or you’d like to prepare for the future through decluttering, I can help. 

Three Easy Methods To Learn Decluttering 

How do you start decluttering? The truth is, the answer may be a little different from person to person. Here are three of the most popular decluttering methods I teach. See which is the right pick for you! 

Rita’s ABC Decluttering Method – A minimalist decluttering method that focuses on categorizing items based on if they are something you’ll keep or not. Rita’s Burst Decluttering Method – A minimalist decluttering method that depends on making use of bursts of time and energy in specific areas of your home. Rita’s Room-by-Room Method – A minimalist decluttering method that lets you approach decluttering one room at a time. 

Try one of these decluttering methods today – or browse my other decluttering courses. 

Rita Wilkins Offers Lifestyle Design And Interior Design Services  

Do you want to learn more about downsizing and decluttering? Call Design Services LTD at 302-475-5663 to discuss your design needs. You can also connect with me by following me on Facebook and LinkedIn. Would you like complimentary advice from the downsizing designer? You can schedule a complimentary 30-minute call with me today. My book Downsize Your Life, Upgrade Your Lifestyle: Secrets to More Time, Money, and Freedom is now available in paperback, audio, and on Kindle! Get your copy soon. 

The post Decluttering Makes Life Easy For You – And Your Family!  first appeared on Design Services LTD.

Starting Over in Your 60s? Top 10 Things to Declutter from Your Life Now

By Rita Wilkins
The Downsizing Designer

Have you ever had to or chosen to start over in your life?

At what point did you realize you wanted to or needed to start over?

How did you do it?

I would love to hear your stories. Email me at ritawilkins@ritawilkins.com if you care to share it with me.

I’ve always been intrigued with the idea of starting over and getting a fresh start because, in some ways, it’s like reinventing or redesigning your life to the way you want it to be and to the way it fits your lifestyle right now.

For those of you who know my story, I’ve reinvented myself and my business multiple times. Sometimes because I had to, sometimes because I wanted to.

When I downsized and became known as the “Downsizing Designer” … I wanted to declutter and downsize. I chose to let go of 95% of my stuff so I could live a simpler life with less.

But there were other times I had to start over. When I got a divorce and became a single mom.

I had to find a new home for my two teenage boys.I had to change my business model to earn a larger income.I had to build a new life for my boys and myself.

Starting over isn’t easy. As a matter of fact, it’s hard and it’s scary because there are so many unknowns with no guarantees. 

But on the other hand, it can be exciting!

It’s an opportunity to ask yourself:

What do you want, what you don’t want?What’s working, what’s no longer working for you right now?What’s most important to you at this stage of your life?

Face it. Life changes and as life changes so must we.

Why do people HAVE to start over?1. Death of a spouse.

Someone you have been with for many years dies. You’re lost, alone, and afraid.

You’re forced to rebuild your life.

2. Health issues and aging.

You’re getting older and starting to have health issues and perhaps cognitive issues. You are concerned about staying in the big house for safety and mobility issues. You’re forced to move to a one-story home or senior living.

3. Loss of your job.

You’re forced to rethink your finances. Do you move and find a smaller home that’s more affordable?

These are examples of people having to start over due to circumstances and events that occurred in their lives. 

But sometimes, people CHOOSE to start over because they want something new, something better, something that fits their lifestyle right now.

Why do people choose to start over in life?1. Empty nest

The kids are gone and the house seems way too big. Perhaps you want to travel, explore, and lead a simpler life.

You choose to downsize and declutter so you can have more freedom… a life with more flexibility and mobility.

2. Retirement

After leaving a lifetime career, you might feel lost, out of sync, and you’ve lost your identity. You’re looking for new meaning, purpose, and fulfillment.

You might choose to start a new business or move closer to your grandkids and your children. You might choose to downsize and declutter to give yourself the freedom you haven’t known in many years.

3. Career changes

You might feel trapped and stuck in a job that you can no longer stand. You might be burnt out and lost the excitement and enthusiasm for a job you once loved.

You finally realize that you need a new beginning so you might start a new business that you’ve been thinking of for years, one that will give you the fresh start and excitement that you’ve been looking for.

These are all examples of how life circumstances and life stages can make you choose to start over in life.

When starting over, there are 10 things you should consider decluttering or letting go of first so you can successfully start anew1. Feeling of past failures.

Put thoughts of failure behind you. Instead, look forward to the new life you are creating for yourself.

2. Blame.

Blaming others get you nowhere. The only person responsible for your past… or your future, is you!

3. Victimhood.

By taking responsibility for yourself and your future, you are empowered. Victims give their power to others.

4. Toxic naysayers.

Say goodbye to anyone in your life who brings you down and tells you “you can’t.”

Instead, surround yourself with people who care about you and your success. They support you during good times in bed.

5.  No boundaries.

Learn to say “no” and mean it.

Create boundaries.

6. Can’t do attitude.

If you want a new life, you need a can-do attitude. Without it, you’ll go nowhere.

7. It’s too hard.

Reframe your thinking to say “yes” it might be hard, but it will be worth it!

8. Guilt.

Forgive yourself and let go of anything you might have done in the past that holds you back. This is the only way you can move forward.

9. Destructive habits.

Let go of habits that don’t serve you and prevent you from having the life you want i.e. procrastination and perfectionism.

10. Let go of anything that no longer serves you

Have clarity about your values, who you are, and what you want, and then go for it!

If you are at a CROSSROADS in your life…

If you are wondering, if it’s time to start over in life… you’re not alone.

We all go through different seasons and circumstances in our lives that force us to adjust, change and start anew.

“The only way out of it is to go through it.”

Whatever your decision, we only get one life and we get to choose how we will respond.

For sure it might be easier to stay exactly where you are right now, but at what cost to your happiness? Starting over is an opportunity to learn, grow, and to live your best life now. 

Life can be challenging. 

Change is hard.

“It’s OK to not know exactly where it’s going.”

It takes courage, strength, resiliency, and resolve to make big changes and to get out of your comfort zone, but won’t it be great to look back and say… “I’m so glad I took the chance to start over”!

Maybe you’ll even laugh at yourself, saying, why didn’t I do it sooner? 

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Choose To Declutter As Self-Care

Don’t Neglect Clutter In Your Home – Choose To Declutter! 

Many feel overwhelmed by the thought of decluttering – a feeling that can keep people living with unwanted clutter for longer than they’d prefer. You don’t have to let clutter take over your life. You don’t have to tolerate the stress and the negative impact on your well-being that clutter promotes. It may seem daunting to take that first step, but you can get started decluttering – and soon. 

Hi all, it’s Rita again. I’m here to remind you that you don’t have to tackle this decluttering thing on your own. The Downsizing Designer is here to help with decluttering tips, tricks, and advice. I know what it’s like to live with too much clutter – which is why I took the necessary steps to change that. Now, you can too. 

Choose Decluttering, Choose Self-Care 

When you choose to take that first step – when you commit to decluttering, you’re choosing to take care of yourself. Decluttering is a form of self-care. Decluttering can help you create a calm environment in your home. It promotes mental-well being by removing a source of stress. It promotes physical well-being by making your home easier to navigate and clean. 

Learn How To Declutter In The Way That Suits Your Needs 

I’ve found that what works for one person when they’re decluttering often doesn’t work for another. That’s why, in my decluttering materials, I teach different methods of decluttering. I also realized that people have different styles of learning, so I’ve made a wide range of decluttering materials. My decluttering checklists or workbooks might work better for someone who likes to read shorter-form materials. My decluttering eBook gives more depth and details. My online decluttering course adds an interactive element that some may find useful to their learning. 

Want a bit of all of the above? If so, I recommend my Decluttering Quick-Start Bundle. With this decluttering bundle, you get 1 complete online decluttering course, 2 decluttering workbooks, 1 decluttering eBook, and 2 decluttering checklists. Get started decluttering today! 

Rita Wilkins Offers Lifestyle Design And Interior Design Services  

Do you want to learn more about downsizing and decluttering? Call Design Services LTD at 302-475-5663 to discuss your design needs. You can also connect with me by following me on Facebook and LinkedIn. Would you like complimentary advice from the downsizing designer? You can schedule a complimentary 30-minute call with me today. My book Downsize Your Life, Upgrade Your Lifestyle: Secrets to More Time, Money, and Freedom is now available in paperback, audio, and on Kindle! Get your copy soon. 

The post Choose To Declutter As Self-Care  first appeared on Design Services LTD.

Baby Boomers, Declutter Now: How to Prevent Your Stuff from Becoming a Burden to Your Family

By Rita Wilkins
The Downsizing Designer

You probably all know someone or perhaps, you even experienced this yourself.

Your parents passed away, leaving a lifetime of possessions behind for you and your siblings to deal with and clean out.

Having NO PLAN ahead of time, having not even talked about how to divide the parents’ possessions, The Big Clean Out turns out into chaos, drama, hurt feelings, jealousy, and rivalry. It has the potential to divide families, so they end up not talking to each other.

None of us wants this to happen after we are gone. We don’t want our kids to get stuck dealing with our stuff, when, in fact, we can help prevent our stuff from becoming an unnecessary burden to our family by taking these 4 steps now.

1. Confront the elephant in the room.

No one wants to talk about it but face it, we will all die, and we need to talk to our kids about disseminating our stuff sooner than later.

Putting the conversation off until tomorrow or the next day because you’re too busy will only make matters worse.

What if you die suddenly and your kids are forced to act quickly to dispose of a lifetime of your stuff? All of this, while dealing with their own emotional loss.What if you die before you get a chance to declutter and designate what you want to go to whom?What if your kids start fighting over your stuff, causing a permanent rift in your family?

All of this can be prevented if we are proactive in facing the fact that we will die, talk about having a plan in place, or how to deal with your possessions, and if we start decluttering our own houses now.

We cannot only help prevent some of the disagreements, hurt feelings, and resentments, but we can also make the entire process easier once we are gone.

2. Get together and talk about it while you are still here.

How do you want to be remembered? By the impact you’ve made during your lifetime or by the mess that you leave behind?

Use this legacy-based approach:

Talk to your kids and family members now.Discuss how to divide and disperse your stuff.Ask who wants what, make a list, leave it in your will, or with important papers.

If you are ready to let go of it, have them remove it from your house now. That can actually help you declutter.

Clearly state your own intentions and communicate your wishes for what you want each child and each grandchild to have.

Give them an opportunity to say “yes” or “no”.

If they say “no,” respect their wishes. It gives you the freedom to let it go.

State your wishes. Talk about how to dispose of items they don’t want. Let them know charities you would like them to donate to.

Get together and talk about this.

Take this opportunity to take pictures, tell stories about some of your stuff and let them know about the family history. Let them ask questions.

This can be a bonding time and bring families closer together. Get involved. Let them get involved in the process.

Letting go can be challenging. Talking about this can be emotional but it’s also an opportunity to:

Connect and say things you’ve been wanting to say.Let them ask the questions they have been wanting to ask.Have fun, laugh, and cry together.Make memories!3. Make a plan.

Develop the plan together. Give yourself time to do this, ideally before you pass away avoiding the pressure and emotion.

The key to this entire process is that you must trust each other and have good communication among each other.

Before doing anything designate a key person/beneficiary to delegate the process. This makes the process smoother, helps prevent hurt feelings and arguments, and helps avoid having to act quickly under pressure.

The plan is intended to equitably/fairly divide and disseminate your possessions and to make decisions about what stays, what goes, and what is to be gifted, sold, donated, or disposed of.

How to distribute to beneficiaries.Have each beneficiary list 5 to 10 things they want. List in order of priority.Compare the list of beneficiaries. If the items on their lists are different, it makes this simple. If they are the same, negotiate about the items that are the same.If it’s still disputed, sell the item and divide the proceeds.If it continues to be disputed, determine the cost and purchase the item from the other person for an agreed-upon amount.4. Start decluttering now.

Think of who can help with this process because it will be physical and emotional.

1.    Your kids, grandkids, and siblingsDon’t be afraid to ask for help!Designate and mark each item that each one wants and agrees upon.Make a list, save the list for when you’re ready to let it go, or have them arrange to take those items with them as soon as possible.Room by room, take your time, and tell your stories while decluttering together.

This process is cathartic. By using this process, it gives you permission to let go of the things you don’t want, your kids don’t want, while making memories at the same time.

2.    Do it yourself

Pretend that you are moving to a smaller home, set a percentage of what you want to declutter, i.e., 50%, 75%. Determine the items that you will need in your new smaller home and select only things that matter to you. This will help you let go of the rest.

3.    Hire a professional

When you have no time or energy to deal with this large project, hire a professional downsizer or organizer.

They will help you sort, donate, dispose of, and organize your stuff. They will also teach you how to let go throughout the process. They will be a significant help for this exhausting task.

How to get rid of your stuff:1.    Gift it

Starting now, who can use something you might want to get rid of? Who might want something that you are ready to declutter, i.e., Furniture, dinnerware, china, crystal, jewelry, artwork, clothing. Identify those people and ask them if they want it. If so, have them arrange to pick it up.

2.    Donate it

Donate to charities that speak to your heart, to those in need of items that you are getting rid of. There are many local churches, charities, and homeless shelters that are in desperate need of things that you are decluttering.

Get your FREE DOWNLOADABLE PDF by signing up here.3.    Consign it

Many local consignment shops and antique shops might be interested in the items you have. They will often pick them up because you’re local.

4.    Sell it

Contact local estate sales groups and appraisers to get information about how to value and sell the items you are ready to get rid of.

5.    Recycle it6.    Free list it7.    Trash it 8.    Liquidate it

Life is a balance between holding on and letting go. If you’re a baby boomer, if you want to prevent your stuff from becoming a burden to your kids and your family:

Face, the fact that we will all die.Talk about how to disperse your stuff.Have a plan in place for what to do with it.Start decluttering now!

Make the process easier for your family when the time comes in order to help prevent family arguments over your stuff.

Remember it’s just stuff. Having your family continue your legacy is far more important. 

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Check out our YouTube playlists if you want to learn more.

VISIT OUR ONLINE SHOP

Follow me on social media for more updates:YOUTUBE | FACEBOOK | INSTAGRAM | LINKEDIN | TWITTERThe post Baby Boomers, Declutter Now: How to Prevent Your Stuff from Becoming a Burden to Your Family first appeared on Design Services LTD.