Kara Dennison's Blog, page 8

I Finally Saw The Mousetrap

 

As I mentioned in my London diaries for this year, I did finally buckle down and see The Mousetrap. It's been running for 72 years, so there's technically no real concern of it suddenly stopping its run. But there is that little part of my brain that assumes that the minute I decide I can just see it "whenever," this pillar of English theatre will suddenly collapse just to spite me. (Don't laugh, it happened with a really good chicken restaurant so now I have trust issues.)
Recognized by the Guinness Book of World Records as "the world's longest-running play," Agatha Christie's The Mousetrap is what I guess we'd term a "cozy murder mystery" in this day and age. It takes place in a massive country house turned guest house, just after a major murder has made it into the papers. As demonstrated early in act one, literally anyone in the cast could be the murderer, and they could absolutely kill again. The audience is silently invited to play detective as the story spins out, with the final twist being one of theatre's best-kept secrets.
Or at least it was 'til someone put it up on the Wikipedia article. But I didn't look before I went because that didn't feel sporting.
I was present for the 29,811th performance of this history-making play. So... is it worth it?
Yeah sure I think so.

The Story
I, frankly, do not care that you can look up the ending online. I am keeping my summary spoiler-free. The cast asked nicely at the end and by God I shall listen.
The story takes place at Monkswell Manor, now owned by Giles and Mollie Ralston and soon to open as a guest house. The married couple have four guests on the docket for opening: Christopher Wren (not that one), Mrs. Boyle, Major Metcalfe, and Miss Casewell. A fifth guest, calling himself Mr. Paravicini, also arrives amidst a raging snowstorm that cuts off the Manor from the outside world.
Just before the action of the play begins, a woman named Maureen Lyon is murdered. The killing hangs over the entirety of the play, initially because every person who walks through the door appears to be dressed fitting the description of her murderer. But the murder veers closer to Monkswell Manor when they receive a visit from Detective Sergeant Trotter, braving the snowstorm to tell them that the murder is in fact tied to this very manor.
The prehistory of The Mousetrap unfolds bit by bit, with nearly every character having some tie to the much olde tragedy believed to have inspired this murder. Someone else in Monkswell will die... and by the end of the first act, they do.
From there, the story becomes a locked-room mystery, with the story of an abused young brother and sister underscoring the action from the past. The murderer is in their midst—and if the constant appearance of "Three Blind Mice" is any indication, one more person will die on this night.

The Twist
"But she's just said she's not giving away the twist!" I'm not. But I do still want to talk about the fact that it exists, its place in theatrical history, and its place in mystery fiction as a whole.
It was interesting coming in as an audience member in 2024, relatively immersed in all sorts of detective fiction (both as a reader and an occasional writer). In many genres, we're in an era where pretty much every twist that can be twisted has been twisted. Things that were once surprises are now tropes, and it can be difficult to remember that when going back and viewing the trope-maker. Nowadays, we "twist" stories by mashing up genres, or fitting a genre or medium used to tell one type of story to another type of story. (Magilumiere Co. Ltd., for example, subverts magical girl tropes by using them to tell a story of finding satisfaction in an adult work environment.)
In other words, the twist of The Mousetrap has emerged in other detective fiction in the decades since. But in the time it was written, it was very new and very subversive and was something of a commentary on the whole genre itself. If and when you go to see it yourself, bear that in mind: this is of another era. This is history-making for more reasons than "lots of performances." You may guess the twist (I did and then second-guessed myself), but it's because Christie herself helped to grow the murder mystery genre with her works (this play included).
And if you don't guess the twist, I don't blame you. Like I said, I second-guessed myself. And there are enough red herrings to jar and pickle for the winter. But even those red herrings (or at least most of them) have a purpose in the larger plot.

The Writing
It won't surprise you to know that the writing for The Mousetrap is Very Good Actually; nor will it surprise you to know I'm especially intrigued by it. A book and a play are two very different beasts, requiring two very different writing methods. Books are read leisurely (by some, I hear); plays happen in a set time at a set pace. With a book, you can flip back and check things you may have missed or reference things that seem important. In a play, you're on a ride and you're not getting off 'til it's over.
As a person of very flighty brain, I was initially concerned about having to remember multiple suspects/potential victims as Giles and Mollie started going over their ledger. But I love the trick Christie pulled here: finding reasons to repeat the names of the lodgers several times in list form—checking their reservations, swapping their rooms, etc. By the time the house was full, you had "Christopher Wren, Mrs. Boyce, Major Metcalfe, Miss Casewell" lodged in your mind.
Each character's personality, motivation, and (chiefly) reaction to everything going on around them differs enough that even if a name slips your mind, everyone stands sufficiently apart. This is naturally well done on the actors' part, too, but it's also very rooted in the writing. Miss Casewell's snide, aloof exterior is worlds apart from Mollie Ralston's professionalism thinly spread over a waiting panic attack. Every character also has layers, and seeing those layers fall away to reveal someone completely new and different and vulnerable is amazing.
There's a reason Agatha Christie is as celebrated as she is. And if for some reason you haven't already seen it in book after book, The Mousetrap will show you.
In short—I went to see The Mousetrap because I love Agatha Christie, and because it's A Thing You Do when you're in London. You go see the forever play with the secret ending. But the focus on its cultural significance fell away as I got into the story, and yeah, there's a reason it's gone on as long as it has.
The Mousetrap is currently being performed at St. Martin's Theatre in London's West End.

November 2024 Book Reviews

Photo by Karolina Grabowska

It's a new month with new book reviews... and new news! I am now writing for (among my usual haunts) Boss Rush Network, where I will be sharing many of my book reviews. After this month, a lot of my niche/genre reviews will go there. I'll still be doing book reviews over here monthly, since not every title I find is necessarily the kind of thing they're looking for. I'll also still be doing the TBR reviews I established last month. In other words, very little will change here, but there will be more elsewhere. And that's a good thing!

Thanks as always to the lovely authors and publishers who send me their books.

ELEVEN HOUSES
by Colleen Oakes
Available Now

Life on the haunted island of Weymouth is strange, but it's also the only life Mabel Beuvry has ever known. She's one of the island's Eleven Houses: families that stand against the dead as they travel from sea to shore, attempting to make their way to the mainland. Houses stand divided, taking the brunt of the dead's attacks house by house after each storm. And after House Cabot's refusal to help led to the death of beloved family, she's content to keep it that way. Until Miles Cabot arrives.

Miles is a rare outsider whose mother left the island and forgot her bonds to it, so his return means several lessons in everything it means to be from Weymouth. That means hazing from the fellow boys, but also difficult talks with Mabel as the two try to work out their quickly-evolving relationship. Not every encounter will be pleasant, though. There are things that even Mabel doesn't know about herself, and a lot of old wounds that need healing as the biggest Storm in decades threatens their shores.

Right off the bat, I wish publishers would stop comparing their books to Twilight in ad copy like it's a good thing. Twilight carries with it a lot of baggage concerning consent and uneven power dynamics, and it's not even the best example (or even a good example) of love across forbidden boundaries in YA fiction. Eleven Houses has a lot of difficult conversations throughout it, but they're ultimately in positive directions. Delicate issues of mental health, bullying, and gender divides are all handled with a compassionate touch without diluting the drama or the romance. Most of all, it's a very atmospheric book, with several flavors of Gothic horror woven among its many houses. It's a great choice for lovers of romance who also enjoy a dash of The Horrors.

EVERY ARC BENDS ITS RADIAN
by Sergio de la Pava
Available Now

Riv del Rio didn't travel to Colombia looking for a new case; rather, the poet/detective was seeking reprieve after a tragedy involving the woman he loves. But a case falls in his lap via a family friend. Carlotta Ochoa's daughter, Angelica Alfa, has vanished. As Riv and his cousins explore the missing persons case further, they discover an unpleasant truth: the powerful Exeter Mondragon is pulling the strings, preventing her investigation from being pursued. But Riv won't give up, even when all signs point to the brilliant young woman already being dead.

The further Riv digs, though, the more unsettling things he finds. Angelica possesses a phenomenal, practically incomprehensible, level of intelligence. Her father was involved in some bizarre business ventures of his own. And when Riv finally comes face to face with Mondragon himself, the situation explodes into a crisis far beyond a single missing person. What the detective now faces involves the nature—and the future—of existence itself.

Every Arc Bends Its Radian is a peculiar book, and that's a compliment. It begins as a somewhat philosophical detective story before going completely off the rails in its second half. The whodunnit (and the "why," although that's a far denser topic) is addressed by the end, but the mystery is a means to an end. This book courts ideas of faith, what it means to be human, and what role our ever-advancing technology plays in our evolution. If I have a complaint, it's that indications of speakers in long conversations are rare. This isn't an issue when Riv and a second character are debating back and forth, since there are only two players and their personalities speak for themselves. But in early chapters, when Riv is in conversation with both of his cousins and they are of similar minds, it becomes difficult to follow the thread of conversation. That aside, this is a surprising and challenging book that will thwart some readers while intriguing others. Personally, I'm in the second camp.

GRIMM CURIOSITIES
by Sharon Lynn Fisher
Available Now

Lizzy Grimm is, for all intents and purposes, the current proprietor of Grimm Curiosities. Her father has passed away, and her mother's gift for communing with the dead has left her unresponsive. As Christmas approaches and rent is long past due, two new visitors begin frequenting purveyor of oddities. The handsome young noble Antony Carlisle has a sister in a similar situation to Mrs. Grimm, and he and Lizzy soon form a close friendship despite their different social spheres. Meanwhile Mr. Stoke, apparently an old friend of Mr. Grimm, has come seeking a rare collection of anonymously-penned books about the paranormal.

But things are starting to shift, and not just as Lizzy navigates her feelings for Antony. Lizzy begins sharing her mother's gift, seeing ghosts around York. The books Mr. Stoke craves start leaving storage and arranging themselves around the shop. And A.A., the anonymous author of Mr. Grimm's collection, turns out to be closer to home than anyone expected. As Antony and Lizzy try to heal their beloved family members, a decades-old conspiracy—with roots in something more ancient still—emerges.

Grimm Curiosities is a stunning romantasy of manners. For most of the novel, the paranormal remains just under the surface, rearing its head only occasionally until the doors literally burst open and a whole new world spills into Victorian York. If you're a fan of Bridgerton but wish it had a bit of dark fantasy threaded through, this is a perfect read. And as we venture into the dark winter months, it's tonally appropriate, too!

THE SEA HOUSE
by Louise Douglas
Available Now

Mila Shepard is in the business of finding people, but her latest job at Toussaints Detective Agency is a struggle even for her. She's been entrusted with a woman's last wish: the late Elisabeth Quemener has bequeathed a package to her old friend Astrid Oake. But there's no sign of who or where Astrid is, or even that she exists. Every time a new lead pops up, it just raises more questions. Meanwhile, Mila is struggling with a mystery closer to home, as more information surfaces about her niece Ani's late parents.

Mila's investigation uncovers decades of injustice: an apparent murder/suicide, school and hospital cover-ups, and dubious cybersecurity. Even when she gets to the truth, there's still more to uncover—much of it strangely echoing the strife in the life of the now-sixteen-year-old Ani.

If The Sea House is your first Mila Shepard book, you can still slide easily into the central mystery. It reads easily as a stand-alone, while still hinting at an overarching story beyond the bounds of the book that can be appreciated to some degree. The story of the week is, at least for a new reader, far more compelling than Mila's story. That isn't to say Mila's story isn't compelling or is too difficult to follow. All the relevant information is there, but it does become evident as the story goes on that we're missing out on some characterization for these recurring characters. That said, Astrid's story speaks for itself. As a solvable mystery, the pieces fit together cleanly; as a novel, it's compelling and tragic. And even once the mystery itself is solved, there are little loose ends that get tucked in neatly—even some the reader may have forgotten.

STAR TREK: SONS OF STAR TREK
by Morgan Hampton and Angel Hernandez
Available November 12

The Day of Blood has passed, and the younger generation of Starfleet is going through it. Jake Sisko has just been reunited with his family, Quark's nephew Nog continues to contend with being the first Ferengi in Starfleet, and Worf's son Alexander remains under suspicion after his time with Kahless. It seems that only divine intervention could break them out of their respective quandaries... and that's what they get. Well, not exactly.

QJ, the son of the same Q we (and many Starfleet captains) know well, snaps his way into the young men's lives. With a few snaps, he transports all four of them to the Starfleet of another dimension: one perfectly situated to address everyone's lingering issues. Familiar faces fill different roles and deceased people live on, allowing the young men the context and closure they need. But there's a problem: QJ's "selfless" stunt has consequences he doesn't appear to be able to undo, and this god-like youth must face the fact that he might also be here to learn a lesson.

This volume contains all four parts of the Sons of Star Trek comic miniseries. While looking out for cameos is fun (Lower Decks enjoyers will be very pleased) and the story itself has a heartwarming upshot, my favorite part of this edition was actually the father/son artwork at the back of the book. It's a great story to be sure, especially for Sisko and Q fans, but those four stills are the icing on the cake.

BOOK PREVIEW - Black Archive #73: Under the Lake/Before the Flood by Kevin Decker and Ryan Parrey

 

The time prior to my trip to London was pretty busy in terms of getting ahead on work, finishing a book (more on that later), and other work. Among that was some editing for last month's new Black Archive, covering Under the Lake and Before the Flood and penned by Kevin Decker and Ryan Parrey.

I stepped up as secondary editor for this one because, frankly, I love a Twelfth Doctor story. And this one is an old favorite for a lot of little reasons put together. The Archive itself is, once again, a reminder that no two writers will ever write an Archive the same—even on the same or similar stories.

Decker and Parrey take a very scientific, philosophical approach to the bootstrap paradox in their book. (For those who aren't familiar with this story, it hangs by some pretty huge bootstraps.) If you've ever wanted to see the natural of time travel in Doctor Who fully documented, complete with diagrams, crack this one open. It's an extremely dense read, but one that I enjoyed, as someone who tends to analyze stories as storytelling first and foremost. It's always fascinating to see where other people bite into the huge club sandwich of Doctor Who, whether that be philosophy, science, or personal experience.

This is, of course, not all this Archive delves into. Most books in the series take a multifaceted approach, covering several aspects of the story. This one does the same, touching on Arthurian literature as represented in the person(?) of the Fisher King. And there's an entire chapter on disabled representation in this story, as well as in television in general.

If you are keen on denser reads where the authors really go into their expertise, this is one you'll enjoy. You will absolutely learn new things along the way (I always do, whether I'm writing or editing for this series). And while I can't promise you'll fully be able to wrap your head around the ethics and means of time travel after this, you'll absolutely have insight you didn't have before.

The Black Archive #73: Under the Lake/Before the Flood is available now from Obverse Books. As ever, I can't in good faith review something I had a hand in (albeit a very small one). But I can gently nudge you in its direction.

London 2024 Diaries

As I mentioned elsewhere, this month marks my first trip back to the UK in five years. (My last trip was 2019, do the math, etc.) I just got back late last night and spent a little bit of time in the evenings and mornings recording what I did. Because reader, it was a lovely trip, and just what I needed.

Big thanks to Mazz and Al, Dan, Liz, JC, Johnny, JJ, the Oxfam, Luke and Andy, and everyone who made me feel welcome during my time here. As I probably say somewhere way down there, you're all reminders of why I love this place so much.

20 October

Because I am someone who likes to have it all, I planned for my flight to leave after my Sunday D&D game. A couple hours' layover in NYC, then a surprisingly quick flight into Heathrow overnight. I stumped for World Traveller Plus because I've been saving up all year and could afford it. That just meant a little extra leg room, nicer dinner, and a drink on takeoff.
Usually I'm much more of a movie watcher on long-haul flights, but I just rewatched Addams Family Values and fell asleep to some episodes of Staged.

21 October
Arrived around midday and met up with the friends who are very kindly giving me use of their guest room. The cats also got reacclimated to me.
In another life I would have been desperate to see and do everything as soon as my feet hit the ground. Now, I'm more about taking it slow. I like to choose one or two things to do per day on these trips and spend the rest of my time being somewhere, anywhere, that isn't home. As much as I love home.

22 October
Today's goal: reacclimate to London. I've not been here since 2019 because things simply kept happening. I love this city, but getting used to it again after being a bit of a hermit for five years was going to take some work and I knew that.
So, Covent Garden. Bought a lot of tea. Had lunch at Chez Antoinette and dessert next door at Creme de la Crepe, watched some street performers, wandered, finished in the basement of Caffe Nero with a book and a drink. Plans were also made and dissolved rather quickly as I realized that going to Manchester or Bristol would take a lot more advance planning. Maybe next year.

23 October
Having failed to remember that the best holidays amount to 1-2 things per day plus relaxing, I ventured out into the city again. But most of my wandering was to kill time before going to see The Mousetrap. The show has been running for 72 years, and yet for some reason I'd never stopped to do the London thing of seeing it. Very glad I did.
For the uninitiated, it's an Agatha Christie murder mystery. Short version: a murder happens at a newly established guest house related to a very old (and very tragic) adoption case, and everyone present has a potential motive, a potential connection to the case, or both. Notably, theatergoers are told not to give away the twist (which I guessed, then second-guessed because there's lots of compelling evidence in lots of directions). If you fancy it, you can just find the ending on Wikipedia, but that doesn't seem sporting. The cast was great - Christopher Wren with his very Matt Smith energy was my favorite.
24 October

Two commitments today. The first was catching up with my old localization trenches buddy Jonathon Collis, who was in town to announce some J-Novel Club stuff at MCM. Four of us made a stop for a cake and tea buffet at Jack & Beyond. Which was excellent. (The pistachio and raspberry cake was my favorite.) I don't think JC and I have seen each other in person in nearly a decade. Always nice to catch up. Maybe in less than a decade next time.
Then off to the Hackney Brewery & High Hill Tap Room for Johnny Chiodini's game night. A very fab night of Bloodborne (I was terrible at it, but there were some absolute champs), pints, pizza, and new friends. Also Johnny's very lovely dog Watson was in attendance. (Johnny is also very lovely, but that feels a bit like a given if you've seen their streams.) If you ever get the chance, head out there for one of Johnny's game nights. It's a friendly, chill group. My one regret is that I live an ocean away; this would be a regular haunt for me otherwise.

25 October
Dan Long came to town for some sightseeing! He is the fella behind Insert Coin Clothing as well as being a fellow guinea pig owner. We looked at lots of animal skeletons at the Grant Museum of Zoology. Very weird, very cool. All praise the jar of moles.
Beyond that, it was casual sightseeing and buying a few little gifts for friends. It was a slower day than usual, mostly by my own design, since I knew I only had three full days left in the country and I wanted to ration out my energy a bit. One big plan a day for the next three days. I did eat something called a "monster whip," though. It was pretty good.

26 October
Today was a long-overdue meeting with Liz Evershed, with whom I worked on the City of the Saved anthology Stranger Tales of the City. (This also serves as proof that, if I miss you on a trip and say "next time," I will make it happen - even if it takes literal years.) Liz took me on a tour of the London Library, an independent lending library housing something like one million volumes. Lots of legendary writers would come here to do research and reading, and their photos are all over the place.
There's also a collection of every issue of the Times ever printed, so I searched out the day I was born. Turns out something kinda major was going on in England on that day, so color me educated. Lots of big regrets stacking up - much like I wish I was local to High Hill Game Night, I wish I was local to this. And had a membership. So many lovely little corners to hide in and read or write.

27 October
Today, you see, was the Halloween live for Mom Can't Cook, one of my two favorite podcasts. (The other is also two grown men discussing things they will probably hate, funnily enough.) Gathered with other fans beforehand and put a lot of faces to screen names. And apparently, even if I am not a famous author, "Kara Dennison" is known among Oxboxtra fans. Which was a thing to quickly sort out in my Negroni-addled brain. (In all seriousness, lovely lovely people, a friendly fandom I'm privileged to be a part of.)
The show itself was magnificent. The movie of the episode was Halloweentown High, which I squeezed in a watch of beforehand. (Once the recording of the episode has aired, I'll put a link to it here.) Luke and Andy were Halloweened up as Brink and Val from Brink! and performed a scene from it (twice). Also got to meet them afterwards and reader, they are lovely and gracious gentlemen. I've had experiences that make me very nervous about meeting my faves, but this was not one of them. I will be back for another live show. Even if the Christmas one is a bit too soon to turn around and travel again.

28 October
And woe, it is my last full day here. Met up with friend JJ (the one that lives in a castle) for a bimble around town. The rain, my bad ankle, and the fact that two things we wanted to visit weren't happening after all put a crimp in our plans. But we did find a nice ramen and curry place, do some Christmas shopping at Fortnum & Mason, and stop for tea and wagashi and gossip about The Old Days Of Anime Cons. (We also wanted to find the Monty Python foot at the National Gallery, but the line just to get in was all the way up the block.)
All that being said, that is truly one of my favorite ways to see London (or any place, really). Destinations are nice, but taking a slow wander with a friend is nicest. As much as I'll be glad to be home with familiarity, I am always sad to say goodbye to England - more so now that I've been back for the first time in five years.

29 October
And a final day of travel. British Airways was on the prowl at Heathrow for people who wanted to upgrade their seat for cheap and... after all, why shouldn't I? For cheap ish. Finally saw Argylle and then watched several episodes of The Traitors.
Being home is always weird. I'm back to the house I grew up in and that I've lived most of my life in, but it always seems both bigger and smaller once I'm home. I love traveling, and I love England. But also I love coming home after clearing my head.
Now, I plan for next year.

How Oxventure: Wyrdwood Uses Homebrew to Mess with Magic

 

Oxventure is pretty much the only actual play channel I have time for, but it's absolutely worth it. After a seven-year run on their first campaign, they're doubling down with Wyrdwood: a folk-horror flavored series using this year's updated PHB. And a lot of homebrew.

Some things are small, such as Cressida Blackwater being a homebrewed human-elf despite the recent nix on half-species. Others play into a core aspect of the campaign: Magic Has Gone Very Wrong. And, as the game itself often reminds us, magic will have its due.

The Story
I can't recommend Oxventure: Wyrdwood enough. It's one of my favorite things this group has done, even as a long-time fan of their original campaigns and side stories. The best way to get a feel for what's going on is to see it for yourself. But for a quick start—or to weigh up whether this will be your bag—here's the story as it stands:
The campaign's setting has had three eras. The first was one of giants. The second was of wild folk: fantasy races like elves, dwarves, firbolgs, and aasimar. Now humans are commonplace, with some of these wild folk living among them. Magic is also common, and makes up a large part of the world's infrastructure. If something were to go awry with magic, it would make a big mess. And it has.
Two months ago, magic became unpredictable. It can be used, but when one least expects it, there will be terrible consequences. As part of a group seeking out answers to this problem, five people have become unlikely allies. Lug (Firbolg Wild Heart Barbarian) is a passive-aggressive forest guide trying not to be killed just for being a Firbolg. Happen (human Swarmkeeper Ranger) hails from a group who worships Cadence, a goddess who delights in extremes of luck—good or bad. Willowfine (Aasimar Life Cleric) is a healer trying to protect her people's connection to traditional magic. Cressida Blackwater (human/elf Illusion Wizard) is a banker cursed with ram's horns forced to share space with inferior party members. And Robin Oatcake (Human Commoner) is a normal man.
Telling any more about the story or characters would give away some fantastic reveals. Again. I highly recommend you watch it for yourself. But the magic—and how the dangers of using magic are replicated in gameplay—warrants discussion. Because it's expertly done in multiple ways.

The Cadence Die
As Happen, Luke Westaway can occasionally avail himself of the Cadence Die: a custom-made d20 that has a 50% chance of rolling a crit (25% success, 25% fail). You can have a look at the design and the die up close on Luke's Instagram.
The Cadence Die can be used a number of times equaling the character's Proficiency Bonus per long rest. Narratively, this represents the Swarmkeeper Ranger's swarm (in this case, pixies) intervening, for better or for worse. There's a markedly higher chance of rolling a 20, but also a markedly higher chance of rolling a 1. And rolling the Cadence Die comes with complications. If you gamble and you lose, you lose hard.
As a player, I'm more narrative-focused: rather than statting out a good character and then figuring out how to make them work narratively (which I also think is awesome), I like to come up with my concept and then figure out how to make the numbers reflect those narrative choices. This die is a fantastic one-two punch, encompassing both the fickleness of the pixies and Happen's own dedication to extremes of luck. So narratively this is extremely satisfying.
It's fair to note that Luke has stated that his favorite way of making characters is to focus on one thing and do it really well. In the original Oxventurers Guild campaign, Luke was also excellent at playing along with failures or crit botches, so this kind of all-or-nothing luck (with just enough mid-tier luck to disappoint Cadence 50% of the time) works well with both his preferences and his strengths.

The Rolling Rite
Having played some Warhammer Fantasy before, I've seen (if not personally experienced) magic with consequences in game. In that system, it comes of rolling double (or God forbid triple) numbers on your dice. Even if you succeed, something will happen. In Wyrdwood, consequences have been turned into an rather genius end-of-show ritual termed the Rolling Rite.
Whenever someone casts a spell in game, they earn a point of debt. Everyone starts at 1, so even if you're not much of a caster, you're not fully safe. At the end of the episode, everyone rolls a d100. If a players rolls their number or lower, they receive a sealed envelope, which they will open next time they cast a spell. This contains some sort of consequence inside. After receiving an envelope, your debt is halved—it never goes all the way down again.
It's a great way of handling the concept of debt, and not just from a showmanship standpoint (although that is very good). The balance between luck and player choice—debt could hit at any time, but it's more likely the more you use magic—is a nice way to leave debt enough to chance without making it fully RNG. And, you know. There's something to be said for knowing over the table that the Debt is coming.
Homebrewing things that translate to story beats while also keeping the game fair and manageable is tough. I know that firsthand. But Wyrdwood is doing an excellent job of sinking a popular system as much into The Horrors as possible. And if you're not already watching, you should be.
Oxventure: Wyrdwood streams Fridays on YouTube.

October TBR Book Reviews: Chilling Autumn Reads

One of the issues with reviewing books for so many outlets is that I often don't get a chance to read the books I buy for myself. I've decided to make a change there—and one way I can force myself to do things I'll enjoy is to set a goal that involves other people. (Don't read too much into that.)

Once a month, or as often as I can, I'll be digging into my very large, very scary TBR pile (and book wishlist) along a theme. This month, it feels appropriate to try some spooky reads: murder mysteries, horror, and the like. These may be books recommended by friends, books written by friends, or things I've just had lying around.

DEATH AT THE DRESS REHEARSAL
by Stuart Douglas

A new book by a lovely friend who also happens to be the head of Obverse Books.

Edward Lowe and John le Breton are actors of an age. The stars of 1970s BBC sitcom Floggit and Leggit, the two are complete opposites both onscreen and in person. But when Lowe discovers the body of a young woman at the reservoir near the show's current filming location, the Northern actor and his posh co-star discover a surprising shared affinity: solving murder mysteries.

The local constabulary are convinced that the death is an unfortunate accident, but Lowe and le Breton are less convinced. In between filming, the two begin chasing down leads in the small town, uncovering a surprising link to a similar death during the War. Even so, everything seems relatively circumstantial—until more young women turn up dead, each with their own familial link to the past death. Now the actors are fighting against the clock, the locals, and occasionally each other to solve this mystery before another life is lost.

Death at the Dress Rehearsal has so many layers, all of them exceptional. The fictional Floggit and Leggit, and the production surrounding it, will be all too familiar to fans of a certain era of Brit-com. The mystery itself is exceptionally handled, with plenty of red herrings but no true dead ends. And if you think you know where the story is going... no you don't. For American readers in particular, this will feel like a dose of nostalgic mid-90s PBS at its best: both the comedy and the mystery. Lowe and le Breton are already shaping up to be the next great detective duo. If they don't get their own TV series, it will be a crime.

DOCTOR WHO: SCRATCHMAN
by Tom Baker and James Goss

I bought this book during my last trip to London five years ago; like many books I bought then, it's been languishing.

The Fourth Doctor has been called before a council of Time Lords to account for his actions—again. And he has a hell of a story to tell them. It starts in a small village on a small island, where the locals have begun turning into animate scarecrows. Accompanied by Sarah Jane Smith and Harry Sullivan, the Doctor tries to get to the bottom of this horrifying mystery. But the roots of this transformation extend past our universe and into the domain of the Devil himself.

Following a folk horror flavored first act, the second plunges directly into Hell. To save his companions and protect the universe, the Doctor must go toe to toe with the Scratchman in a series of larger-than-life games. The past and the future collide, and the very nature of fear itself is explored, as the Doctor and his companions navigate a hellscape designed to drive them to despair.

Scratchman is based on a concept conceived of by Tom Baker and Ian Marter during Baker's first season as the Doctor. Adapted and ghostwritten by James Goss (one of the best Doctor Who novelists currently working) with Baker acting as consultant, this is a pitch-perfect book. The Doctor, Sarah Jane, and Harry's voices ring out loud and clear, especially in the Doctor's first-person narration. As the book comes to a close, it becomes a musing on the franchise as a whole, past and future. What is the Doctor afraid of? Why does he keep fighting? And what does it really mean to be the Doctor? This book manages to be both terrifying and playful the whole way through, and it's the exact sort of Doctor Who story I personally love. This may be my new favorite tie-in book for the show.

THE FINAL GIRL SUPPORT GROUP
by Grady Hendrix

This book came in a care package from friend and coworker Paul Chapman.

In Lynnette Tarkington's world, horror villains—and their final girls—are real. Slasher franchises are fictionalized takes on very real killings, with their plucky survivors becoming celebrities in their own right. But killing a killer takes an emotional toll, which is where the Final Girl Support Group comes in. But this week, one of the survivors has decided she's terminating her membership. And another member has been quite literally terminated.

Now, Lynnette—whose trauma has left her mostly friendless and extremely vigilant—is convinced that someone is out to take out the entirety of their group. But between her status as a "fake" final girl, her paranoia, and some leaked files, no one is willing to trust her. Now, Lynnette must use everything at her disposal to survive, all while protecting new final girl Stephanie from the horrors the rest of them have endured. But the true danger may be closer than anyone thinks.

I wasn't sure what to expect with The Final Girl Support Group, but I can see why it took off. It's always nice to see a female lead allowed to be flawed, much less many, many female leads. Lynnette is an absolute mess; she's also the narrator. But she's one of several examples of what trauma can do to a person both inside and out. It's a skillful pastiche of several slasher genres, but also takes into account that trauma does not necessarily make you noble. It can make you messy, unpleasant, paranoid, and not fun to be around. You'll like it if you're a horror aficionado; you'll love it if you've Been Through Stuff yourself.

GARTH MARENGHI'S TERRORTOME
by Garth Marenghi

While I was already a Darkplace fan, this book was brought to my attention by Mach Dent.

As a book reviewer, I read a lot of good books. I also read a lot of... less good books. And just as Garth Marenghi's Darkplace hit just right with its pastiche of poorly-produced television, Garth Marenghi's TerrorTome is a note-perfect parody of frankly awful books by people who believe they are God's gift to writing. Penned by Matthew Holness as his horror writer, dreamweaver, and visionary, plus actor, it's also a reminder that writing terribly on purpose takes a unique level of talent.

TerrorTome is actually a trilogy of books starring Nick Steen, a thinly-veiled author stand-in for Marenghi himself, as he and his strong but often misguided lady editor Roz Bloom navigate the horrors haunting Stalkford. After a torrid psychosexual relationship with a cursed typewriter, Steen discovers that the inner workings of his mind are coming to life. His heroes, his monsters, and even his darker selves threaten to destroy the world. How will he fix it? And, more importantly, could this have been prevented if Roz had listened to him?

This book is definitely written for those who have seen and enjoyed Garth Marenghi's Darkplace. If you haven't, you can probably still appreciate the inherent satire. But so much about this book is even better when you have a clear picture of the man behind it. If you are a Darkplace fan, and especially if you're an editor or reviewer who's had to slog through difficult reads, you'll love this book. It's both shocking and impressive how perfectly he nails not only the common mistakes, but also the kind of ego that refuses to fix them.

STARVE ACRE
by Andrew Michael Hurley
This book has definitely been making the rounds, but I picked it up specifically on a recommendation from Johnny Chiodini.

Richard and Juliette Willoughby's young son Ewan died suddenly, and both of them are navigating the resulting grief very differently in Richard's family home of Starve Acre. Richard, given paid time off from his teaching job to "do research," has immersed himself in digging up—both literally and metaphorically—legends of an old tree once used for hangings. Juliette has turned to local occultists in hopes of finding some sort of solace. But both of them discover something much darker lingering on their land.

As Richard remembers Ewan's final months—his odd changes, his violent moods, and his claims of being spoken to by a being called Jack Grey—something else begins to take hold. Juliette's friends reveal a truth she is unwilling to divulge, but also sense something sinister at work in the house. And then there's the hare Richard finds at the foot of the tree, whose presence defies all logic but which refuses to be sent away.

Starve Acre is one of those books I've been putting off for no reason other than no time, but I absolutely regret not having read this sooner. It's a very personal story, and not just because its core cast is very small and it takes place largely within one family's house and land. As an allegory for grief, it's a sobering reminder that how we cope (and what we do to ourselves) is not a monolith. As an entry in the genre of folk horror, it's a terrifying story whose influence is large enough to spread to a whole town and small enough to fit in a baby carriage. An absolute must-read, and one that should move quickly to the top of your list.

TEA REVIEW: Chapters Cozy Fall Black Tea Box Set

 

NOTE: I am a Chapters affiliate - however, I pay for all teas I review and give my honest opinions. I do receive compensation if you use my discount code. Thanks for supporting my work and small businesses!
Chapters Tea and Co. may have dropped the coffee from their catalog, but that just means more room for more literary-inspired tea blends! The newest seasonal box is perfect for getting cozy with your favorite books, with sweet and spicy flavors that complement the chill in the air (or serve as an aesthetic stand-in as you wait for the weather to cool off).
This box contains two new seasonal blends and one regular offering. All three of these flavored black teas can be ordered individually, or as part of the Cozy Fall Black Tea Box Set. The box set comes with one 2oz bag of each blend, plus a pack of steeping bags and a very gothy black metal measuring spoon.
Don't forget to use my code KARAD15 at checkout to get 15% off your order!


Chai Café VanillaThe returning favorite, Chai Cafe Vanilla has been in the Chapters catalogue almost since the beginning. One thing I especially like about chai from Chapters is that it has a legitimate bite to it—like their Dune-inspired The Spice Chai Mélange, this blend includes black pepper and white pepper in addition to other sweet and savory spices.
While I personally usually take all my tea straight-up and steeped very strong, Chai Café Vanilla is absolutely made for milk tea lovers. It's great straight up, but even better with milk (which also brings out the vanilla flavor). But if you're like me and generally add nothing, it's a great late-day warm-up.



Poet's Pumpkin SpiceYou can't have a fall drink set without pumpkin spice! This is one of the two new seasonal blends introduced in this box, and almost certainly the one most of you will be interested in. This is my personal favorite of the set, which is largely down to my love of teas that are at their best when they're at their strongest.
This blend contains pumpkin pieces in addition to cinnamon, orange, and apple flavors. Nothing in this blend overpower the rest; rather, it all comes together in one unified autumn-y flavor. If you, like me, are a fan of Chapters' darker, stronger teas (like Poet's Study and Second Breakfast), this will become a new go-to. It's become my morning breakfast tea for autumn.

Cozy Apple SpicePoet's Pumpkin Spice may be my personal favorite, but this one is the MVP of the fall box. When you open the bag, this blend smells exactly like fresh apples. And that stays after you've brewed it up. It's a little bit tart, but not too much; if you've disliked apple teas before because they end up a little too sour, you're safe with this one.
As with the Chai Café Vanilla (and the Poet's Pumpkin Spice, really), this one would make a great milk tea. It doesn't brew up quite as strong as the pumpkin spice or the chai, but still strong enough that it'll make a nice cozy autumn drink.


Chai Café Vanilla is part of the regular Chapters catalogue, but seasonal blends may or may not stay. The Cozy Fall Black Tea Box Set and Poet's Pumpkin Spice look to be in limited supply, so get them while you can! And remember to use the code KARAD15 at checkout for discounts across the site.

October 2024 Book Reviews

 

I'll be honest, September kind of disappeared on me. Between racing to the finish on a book deadline, personal life stuff, and planning for a trip to the UK later this month, I can't believe it's already October. But I'm not at all down about it. I love autumn, I love longer nights, I love cooler weather (eventually), and I love curling up with a book amidst all of those.
This month's selections unearth conspiracies, bend timelines, and unite couples across both real and digital spaces. Thanks as always to the publishers who hook me up with these great reads—I hope you enjoy them as much as I did!


SOCIETY OF LIES
by Laura Ling Brown
Available now

Maya's return to Princeton was meant to be a double celebration: her class reunion and the graduation of her little sister Naomi. But upon Maya's arrival, the unthinkable happens: Naomi is found dead, supposedly in an accidental drowning. But Maya refuses to believe this was an accident. And through three perspectives—Maya now, Maya ten years ago, and Naomi in the months leading up to her passing—readers learn the shocking truth.

Both Maya and Naomi were members of Sterling, one of Princeton's prestigious "eating clubs." They were also members of Greystone, a secret society run from deep within Sterling, through which lifelong favors were earned, granted, and paid off. While Maya despises the underhanded dealings of Greystone, she does what she must to give her sister a better life—even if it means accepting bribes and acting dishonestly. Eventually, the club's activities lead to the supposedly accidental death of a girl named Lila. But after Naomi's tragic death, Maya learns that her little sister was digging deep into Sterling's (and her own) history. And that digging could lead to more deaths before this case is solved.
In her first novel, Laura Ling Brown paints an all too believable picture of a secret society on an Ivy League campus. While the tradition of eating clubs is very real, Sterling and Greystone are not real themselves... at least not by name. Their practices and procedures ring distressingly true. However, as dire as Maya and Naomi's story may be, Brown paints a vivid pictures of hope amidst despair. It's a thrilling whodunit with twists right up to the very last page, but also a reminder that justice can prevail even in a world with the odds stacked against you.


SHOESTRING THEORY
by Mariana Costa
Available October 8

Cyril Laverre was once a grand mage. Now, he's watched his world fall apart, and even his loyal cat  familiar Shoestring has passed on. With nothing left to lose, he sacrifices himself to cast one last-ditch spell: one that will take him back in time to the beginning of the end of the kingdom of Farsala. But when he awakens in his twentysomething body again, things are awry. Shoestring is back, but he's acting more like a normal cat than a wise familiar. The wedding ring he wears around his neck has somehow followed him to the past. And Eufrates Margrave—who in Cyril's original timeline became both Farsala's despotic king and Cyril's husband—has been pulled back in time, too.

With his plans to assassinate his former lover now scrapped, Cyril enacts a mad plan to prevent Eufrates from taking the throne once again. His first goal is to prevent the death of Eufrates's sister Tigris, allowing her to marry her fiancé Atticus and take the throne. But as Cyril peers further into the weave of magic around him, he discovers that there's more to the kingdom's downfall than even he knew. More troubling still, it seems he's still madly in love with his wicked husband.
Shoestring Theory is billed as a "friends-to-lovers-to-enemies-to-lovers" romance for people who like fanfiction, but I feel this sells the novel short. For one thing, fanfic is not a monolith; for another, there's so much more to the story than its central turbulent romance. (Although, yes, that's huge and very fun.) As exciting as the broad story is, the underlying tale of Cyril's own character progression is the most rewarding part of the story. He's depressed, imperfect, and full of regrets; but even as an older man literally revisiting his youth, he has room to grow and change. Equal measures light-hearted and thought-provoking, this is a fabulous fantasy-romance with a wonderful message about finding your heart and your self-worth.

BYE FOREVER, I GUESS
by Jodi Meadows
Available October 22

Ingrid Ant is a shy, nerdy 13-year-old with a secret: she runs "Bye Forever, I Guess," a super-popular Scrollr blog dedicated to the funny wrong number texts she constantly receives. Her best friend Rachel is obsessed with this status symbol, but criticizes everything else about Ingrid—her love of the Ancient Tomes Online MMO, her long-distance friendship with fellow gamer Lorren, and her obsession with a line of fantasy novels. When Rachel crosses an uncomfortable line when introducing her to new kids Alyx and Oliver, Ingrid decides she's had enough... and with an attempt to make a clean break comes what seems like a school-wide spurning.

Fortunately she still has Lorren, ATO, and her new friend "Traveler." Initially a wrong number trying to profess his love to a Rachel of his own, this astronomy lover (who only knows Ingrid as "Stitches") joins Ingrid in game and becomes a source of friendship as her few friends at school (including Oliver and Alyx) seem to gravitate toward Rachel. But Traveler has a secret that he's convinced will destroy everything he and Ingrid have. And as Ingrid prepares to finally meet her favorite author face-to-face, all those secrets start to come out.

Bye Forever, I Guess is an adorable story that, beyond just being a fun and sweet read, has a lot to recommend it. Parents will be more than happy to hand this off to teen readers, as it's packed with excellent advice about how to stay safe online while still forming meaningful friendships. The character of Rachel is a very clear depiction of a narcissistic personality, and will help young people navigate people like this in their own life. Best of all, it's great to see niche hobbies—from knitting to MMOs to Tumblr (here rebranded as Scrollr)—presented as aspects of a well-rounded and happy person's life, rather than some sort of silver bullet of weirdness. (Huge respect for Ingrid's grandma the skilled knitting YouTuber, too.) It's refreshing to see a story like this told with earnestness and authenticity, and it will speak to kids and adults alike.

THE CRACK IN THE CRYSTAL by Barak Engel
Available October 22

For all her life, Sollis has been weird: taller than normal and possessed of strange wild magic. After making use of her abilities as best she can for some time, she is recruited into a mission with four other gifted individuals. Aidan can communicate with wood, coaxing it into new shapes; Nyelle has bardic powers that can shape sound itself; Lormek is a beloved of Thor haunted by strange dreams; and the gnome Garrett uses his roguish talents to help the party out of tight spots. But what starts as a normal heist soon turns into a battle for reality itself.

As the five new companions navigate conspiracy, magical history, and mysterious writings from a far-off world, Sollis and Lormek attempt to make sense of a strange connection between them. A power beneath the city calls to Sollis, and it soon becomes clear that there is more to her even than already meets the eye.

As mentioned in the Author's Note, The Crack in the Crystal was inspired by a pandemic-era D&D campaign. This is evident for better or for worse—for better in that there's clearly a great deal of care put into character voices, worldbuilding, and giving everyone a satisfying ending; for worse in that characters will occasionally underreact to major revelations. The latter can sometimes pull the reader out of what is otherwise an enthralling read. That said, The Crack in the Crystal is still fun fantasy with a spirit of escapism and camaraderie that D&D players will enjoy and an admirable twist in the tale at the end.

STAR TREK: LOWER DECKS - WARP YOUR OWN WAY
by Ryan North
Available October 22

It's a normal morning for Beckett Mariner—until it isn't. Things have gone weird aboard the USS Cerritos. Boimler has adopted a pregnant tribble... or Khan is back... or the Borg are invading. It depends on which path you, the reader, choose. But whichever direction you go, one thing stays the same: everyone seems to think Beckett knows the ship's highly confidential prefix code. Which, as she states time and again, she doesn't.

Wait, "time and again"?... That's right. It doesn't take long to find out that, whatever is happening, it keeps happening. Someone is very intent on getting this code. And to break the cycle, you're going to have to do some seriously out of the box thinking.

It's been great to see "interactive novels" making a comeback recently, and this is the first interactive comic I've read personally. Going with Lower Decks was a great choice for a title like this, where the bendiness and genre-savvy actually come in handy. How quickly you find your way out of the cycle will be largely down to chance; for me it took a while, but even then I didn't catch all the potential plot lines. This is one you'll want to cheat your way through when you're finished, just to see what you missed. It's a heck of a lot of fun, and a great way of embracing this classic choose-your-own-adventure style.

TTRPG REVIEW: Tales from the Loop

 

I am a child of the 80s and I grew up on sci-fi. When that's your background, Amblin and the like are kind of in your DNA. So games like Tales from the Loop absolutely appeal. Set in "the '80s that never was," this nostalgic adventure game casts players as a cast of adventurous kids and teens getting extremely involved in the strange happenings around a particle accelerator simply called The Loop. It's a great setup with a lot of promise and a lot of room for characterization. And then... some issues.
Before we start, a few notes about me and how I interact with tabletop games, since I'm noticing I'm starting to get a few more readers of late. Unless otherwise specified (and probably not for quite a while), I am a player in any games I review, not the GM. But I do always talk with the GM about what their experience was, because that's important to me, too. In terms of play-style, I'm narrative-forward—not because I think that's the "right" or "superior" play style (I think anything that lets you and the rest of the table have a good time is the "right" way to play), but because that's just personally how I vibe. I build a concept within the setting I'm given, then match the numbers to that concept, even if it's not "optimal" and even if it will make it harder for me to succeed. I do always make sure I have at least one way to objectively help the party, though, because this is a team sport.
All that is a very long way of saying I seek out, and enjoy, games that attempt to marry narrative more smoothly to mechanics. And I think because I seek those out so regularly, I get to see a lot of examples of how people try to make that happen, how it succeeds, and how it fails.

There are a lot of things I like about Tales from the Loop. A big one is the choice to really lean into tropes by way of playbooks/classes. This is something I enjoy about both Powered by the Apocalypse games and Free League Games—and honestly any system that cares to try it. When you're setting a game within a genre or a subgenre, one way to really root yourself in what you're doing is to know what the common characters are and how they benefit the party. It also gives you touchstones in that early character creation process, and (if designed well) it doesn't hold you back from putting your own spin on that character trope.
For example, I played the Jock. And while my character was all physical stats and very little in mental, it was because she was very agile (her sport of choice was sailing) and climbed through windows and into buildings with very little thought for what she was doing at any given time. That's the joy of a really good playbook. While more modular character gen (like that in 5e) allows for really nuanced builds, playbooks let you muck around with genre in a meaningful way.
Other things Loop does well—turning character traits into mechanics in a more straightforward way. While I enjoy figuring out how stats turn into story beats (How does rerolling for Luck look in combat? How does Advantage or Disadvantage look? Why is a seasoned adventurer only level 3?), I have a soft spot for any system that draws that straight line for me. Pride is one of those ways: once per session, you can cash in a personal belief of your character to gain a success.
I've explained this before when talking about Armour Astir and Blades in the Dark, but I value anything that rewards you for playing in-character. (I'm also gaining an appreciation for anything that has stakes when your values are challenged, but I'm still in the midst of an experience with a game like that.) I'm not against putting myself at a disadvantage to stay true to my concept, but it makes me happy that doing this functionally helps the group as a whole.

The major downside of Tales from the Loop is more in the pre-fab campaign we played. The feedback I've gotten from multiple GMs is that this is a great setting that requires a bit of additional work. In the longer game I've finished, we worked from the pre-written campaign. However, this required a lot of patching up and changing along the way. It wasn't as egregious as the issues with Lost Mountain Saga, where keeping the plot moving required players to actively shelve their knowledge of the fae and their personal motivations in favor of narrative causality. It was more the amount of legwork required to bring the characters into some of these stories.
I will admit, I generally play characters who are more than ready to throw themselves face-first into anything even remotely interesting. That's just the kinds of characters I gravitate toward, either at a table or when writing a story. But you can't expect everyone to always play that kind of character. I also understand that a pre-fab campaign can't account for every potential stake for characters the writer will never meet. However, the issue with Tales from the Loop seemed to be that many of the narrative hooks weren't really wanderable-innable, even for the most nosy and motivated kid.
In terms of pre-fab campaigns, I believe that creating motivation is a shared responsibility across three sets of people. First, the player has to create a character who can be engaged in the action. Even if they're reluctant, there has to be something that can be invoked to pull them along. Second, the GM has to hold out a metaphorical hand for the player to take. It's not on them to motivate the characters, but it is on them to meet them halfway; they don't have to drag them up the cliff face, but they should at least scatter some handholds around. Finally, the writer of the pre-fab campaign needs to make a story that can be hooked into by a sufficiently motivated group. Again, they don't have to drag the party up the cliff face, or even put handholds in the cliff face, but there ought to be something at the top that makes the cliff face worth scaling. Often, it didn't feel like there was anything to interest young protagonists, and the only fire burning under a player's ass was the urge to find the next story beat and see if it jogged anything. Our GM did a great job manufacturing these hooks, but there was a lot of progression that amounted to "You ought to just decide that this is a good place to go," which can ruin the pacing of a game.
There's a more minor downside that's a little more system-based, which is that healing from damage takes a weirdly long time and can require a lot of moving parts that don't click well with how the story moves. Don't get me wrong, I love how damage works on a basic level. You have "conditions" (some physical, some emotional) that you take when things go wrong, or to push yourself and reroll. These conditions affect your ability to roll well, and if you take them all... well, kids don't die in this game. Remember, this is 80s sci-fi adventure. But you have to go to specific people and places and spend several hours recuperating. Fine for downtime, difficult for fast-paced action. In our test campaign, we homebrewed around this.
In the end, I love the aesthetic, the concept, and the feel of Tales from the Loop. But I feel it's a system to be altered, homebrewed, and referenced. The character building? Great. The setting? I think it's more meaningful if you move the placement of the local Loop to a place meaningful to the party. (Really tweaks the nostalgia to play in your hometown circa 1987 rather than a place no one has been.) The pre-written campaigns? Some interesting elements (I loved the microchipped birds), but again, better to homebrew.
Tales from the Loop is frankly a game that's better the more personal you make it to your players. To that end, I highly recommend the system in general, and aspects of the setting, but I would also encourage any interested players to do a bit of customizing to bring out its real charm.

Five Years Since London

 

Back in 2019, bestie Ginger asked if she could tag along with me on my next trip to the UK. Of course I said yes. I went every couple of years just because, and she had never been overseas. As far as she was concerned, it would be her only time getting to. And on the plane back, she was already talking about "next time."
As far as we were concerned, next time would be next year. The Cubs (her favorite baseball team) were scheduled to play an exhibition game in London. Well. Of course I'd be happy to go with her. No need to even ask.
Then 2020 happened, and the only real plus side was that we hadn't bought any tickets in advance.
A lot has happened since then... globally, yes, obviously. But now the man who raised me has passed away, I own the house I grew up in (and its many leaky creaky bits are my responsibility to repair), and my finances are finally such that I can travel again. But it's really, really strange how something that became so second-nature to me half my life ago can become so foreign after five years.
I remember my first trip to the UK: something I assumed would be once-in-a-lifetime. It was Christmastime, I spent most of the trip up in Manchester with friends and made London a relatively brief visit, and even getting stranded in a few spots on the way back due to flights being cancelled didn't ruin it. It was a trial-by-fire solo trip there and back. But after everything that happened, subsequent trips felt easy.
On one trip, I recall leaving a friend's club in London, several white wines and a lot of conversation I've mostly forgotten later, and making it home to my friends' place a few stops outside the city without getting lost or turned around. And picking up sushi to go along the way. For me, someone who's clumsy and forgetful and always has been, it was weirdly empowering to conquer a major city that way. (Never mind that the tube makes it extremely easy to traverse London—I'll take my victories where I can.) Whatever the reason, and despite my general distaste for big cities, London has become a place where I feel surprisingly okay.
And yet 2020 did a number on all of us. Even now, I still get anxiety about going out to run errands. I feel weird about it being the "first time" to do something since then. It's not the first time getting on a plane since 2019, fortunately; that was for Ginger's wedding. And for a bit, as I was weighing up locking down the ticket, I felt serious anxiety. Like I'd never done this before. Like I was in my 20s again and facing down something totally new. And I wonder how long it will be like that for each of us. Four going on five years later, what will be our First Time Since?
For what it's worth, the anxiety is gone, because I remembered how much I love touching down in London and seeing all those familiar people and places. I've got tickets to (what I swear is going to be) a very cool show, I've got my new clothes bought, I have plans and plans-for-plans with friends I've not seen in ages. And yes, there will be photos and blog posts.
I started writing this freeform because I wasn't sure what to say this week—I'm between books and tea samples and publications, and other things I'd like to talk about long-form haven't really progressed enough for a deep dive. But I'm trying to be better about always having something lined up, even if that means talking a lot of nonsense. I suppose this is to acknowledge that we've all got things we're coming back to, even now. And I hope whatever it is you're coming back to, it goes well.
And also that I'll be in the UK for a bit next month and I can't wait.