Lamar Hardwick's Blog, page 16

My ABC’s of Autism Advocacy

Last month was Autism Awareness month and people all over the globe were communicating, campaigning, criticizing, and complaining about autism and the like. When it comes to autism and autism advocacy/activism there is nor shortage of opinions or passion. To be honest April can be a little overwhelming for me for a few reasons.

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I was diagnosed with ASD (Aspergers) in December of 2014. While I have been in pastoral ministry since 2002, I have only been apart of the autism community (officially) for the last two years. With nearly 15 years of public speaking under my belt, I have developed a level of comfort in communicating about topics that I am passionate about. I have been trained by teachers who taught me how to use a variety of tools to communicate my passion and my position about a number of issues. I was trained to understand the culture and context of the audience with which you are communicating. I was taught to communicate with clarity, compassion, and conviction. These are just a few of the tools that I have tried to develop over the last 15 years of being a pastor and public speaker.

April can be challenging for me because I don’t have nearly as much experience speaking and communicating about autism as I do about my faith. I am learning something new everyday, and at this point the only thing I am certain about is my own narrative. I can share that with complete confidence and transparency because I own it. So that’s what I do. I share my story, my experiences, and occasionally my opinion.  I talk about my life, my family, my faith, my frustrations, and my faults. I share my life because as I often say, I believe when it relates to autism and advocacy we need more than just stats we need stories. Real stories from real people diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder. My story is just one of many.

 When it comes to autism and advocacy I am still very much evolving, learning, and growing, but one thing that will always remain is that my core values and my training as a communicator heavily inform when I write, how I write, and mostly importantly why I write.

 Over the last few months I have been asked about my advocacy and my approach to sharing my passion for all things faith, family, and autism.  My personal approach is simple. I follow my own personal ABC’s of advocacy.

A=  Accuracy & Authenticity 

I’ve spent approximately 7 years pursuing post-graduate studies in theology and church ministry. Included in those courses of both my masters and doctorate, was a heavy focus on preaching. Without a doubt the most impactful lesson I learned was to appreciate the role of context. Ignoring context causes us to inevitably ignore accuracy. When I write or speak about autism advocacy I true my best to find the appropriate context of the discussion as well as the appropriate context for the discussion. Over the last few years I’ve made plenty of mistakes, but one thing I strive to be is authentic but in order to do so I have to be as accurate as possible.

B= Be balanced and not biased

I have my own experiences and opinions about many things concerning autism. I have things that I believe deeply and topics that I am extremely passionate about, but sometimes putting my passion in the correct place requires me to have the courage to be willing to listen to opposing views. I believe that one of the greatest personal and spiritual growth catalysts is the ability to absorb information from sources that have differing belief systems, opinions, values, and practices from my own. I don’t have to agree or change my position, but I do think I owe it to myself and to the people my advocacy serves to know and appreciate other perspectives, especially if it helps me to grow.

C= Compassion & Critical Thinking

Believe it or not the two ideas don’t have to be mutual exclusive. As a trained scholar and public theologian, I have learned that critical thinking doesn’t necessarily have to lead to criticizing communication. My faith demands that I practice compassion and extend grace in every situation. Learning to balance my natural inclination to surgically deconstruct someones stance with the role of compassion is a delicate balancing act, but I have to constantly remind myself that when it comes to autism advocacy behind every position is a person. Civility and humility goes a long way in working with people by standing for inclusiveness without unintentionally alienating others in my community.

*Bonus

D=  Don’t read the comments. Ever. Seriously.

In the past year I have had someone imply that I am a liar, a con artist pastor (although I’ve never actually asked for anything from anyone because I have a job), I’ve been accused of using my religion as a crutch (although I was a Christian before I was diagnosed), and my all time favorite was a woman who felt sorry for my family and implied that living with me must be like living with an alcoholic because I am not always able to effectively manage my sensory resources.

I used to read the comments in my articles and blogs with regularity until realized that I have been insulted more than I care to have ever read.

So my last piece of advice is DON’T READ THE COMMENTS. EVER!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

4 Ways to make the most of April

April is all about Autism Awareness. The last two and a half years of my life have been a journey toward both self-discovery and self-advocacy. As I have slowly stepped out of the shadows I am continually gaining  both the comfort and confidence to add my voice to the valuable discussion about autism in our communities.

Venturing out has afforded me the opportunity to share my personal story of being diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder as an adult. I was 36 when I was diagnosed. I had a family and a career, and although I continue to have my share of silent struggles, I have for the most part been able to experience some success in navigating the world of autism as an adult. As a result, one of the most common comments I receive from others is fairly common among people with disabilities. “You’re such an inspiration.”

Since officially becoming a part of the autism community, I have become more aware of the potential problem with statements such as these. It is sometimes difficult to feel inspirational for others when you’re simply living your life. Going public with my autism diagnosis shouldn’t necessarily make me a hero. Honestly there is a part of me that often doesn’t want to be an inspiration. At all. Ever.

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On the other hand, I am a pastor and with that profession comes the responsibility and drive to inspire people to something greater. It’s a very complicated balance, one that I will be willing to admit that I am no where close to mastering.

I often tell my congregation that a good way to be better is to not only focus on what we want to overcome, but on who we want to become. So while I have to wrestle with my new “normal” that my Aprils will be filled with well-meaning supporters who will message me about how inspired they are by my courage and transparency, I also know that my role in many ways is to inspire our society to become better. With that being said, I want to share four ways that I would like my life and my story to inspire you to not just applaud what I have seemed to overcome, but also discover who and what you can become.

1. Become more Aware

Since being diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder, I’ve learned a lot about myself, but even more importantly, I have learned a lot about why I knew nothing about myself for so many years. Since being diagnosed, I have been confronted with stereotypes about autism, stereotypes that I believe are the reason why so many other adults, minorities, and young girls go undiagnosed.

Autism has received a lot of attention in the last decade, but there are still millions of people who don’t know nearly enough about autism and how it affects people. I should know; I was one of those people. Until I was diagnosed, most people I had a personal relationship with knew very little about autism.

Autism awareness is important, but I would like to inspire you to an awareness that doesn’t simply acknowledge the existence of autism, but instead seeks knowledge about autism. 

Autism is a spectrum; so many people are affected in different ways. Educate yourself about autism by asking questions from people who are really living with autism. Autism awareness should be about expanding people’s exposure to the life of autistic people. That can’t be done with statistics; it can only be done with stories.

Ask questions. Assume nothing. Aspire to become more accepting.

2. Become more Accepting

My line of work makes me somewhat of a public figure. One of the primary reasons I disclosed my diagnosis to my entire church and community was my belief that my platform as a pastor should be used to help the community learn how to embrace all types of diversity. Neurodiversity is the concept that neurological differences should be recognized and respected as any other human variation. Simply put, the autistic mind works differently than a “neurotypical” mind, but the differences should not be used as an opportunity to assume any level of deficiency.

If my life is to be an inspiration to you, let it inspire you to be more accepting of those who think, process, and live differently than you. Accepting autistic people includes accepting all of what makes them who they are. In a world that struggles with intolerance and indifference, my hope is that you will realize that to make a difference, you have to be willing to be different. Autistic minds are very different, but when given the right opportunity we can make a huge difference in the world — for the better.

3. Become an Advocate

I was once told to never allow my life to be defined by either the applause of my fans or the attacks of my critics. It’s one of the most profound pieces of advice I’ve ever received. As a pastor, I acknowledge those who applaud me, and I take careful consideration to those who attack me, but I am motivated most by those who advocate with me. Nothing communicates my ability to inspire you more than the creation of another voice that becomes a champion for the cause for which I myself am committed. Real inspiration happens when you move from merely being an admirer to being an advocate. Advocate not because I need a voice to speak for me, but because my voice has inspired you to join with me and so many other voices speaking on behalf of the autism community.

4. Become more Active

Autism awareness is a great start. But if you really want to be inspired by my life, be active and not reactive. Being actively involved in the autism community starts by finding meaningful ways to engage in May when Autism Awareness Month is over. From May to March, be active and stay active.

Three ways to actively engage in the issues facing the autism community are policies, programs, and platforms.

Find out which state, local, national, and insurance policy issues most affect the autism community and make your voice count as an advocate for those on the spectrum. Join or create programs at the local and national level to assist and provide support for autism spectrum individuals and families. Finally, use your platform to educate, empower, and encourage change.  Everyone has a platform that they can use to do as much as possible to make an impact. You can’t do everything, but you can do something.

If you really want to be inspired by my story of perseverance, hope, and courage, that’s OK. But don’t just be inspired by what I have overcome, be inspired to help our society focus on what it should become. More accepting.

Let’s do this together. Let’s change the world.

Thanks to Jeff Bell and A2A Spotlight for covering my a story about my life, my ministry, and my new book I Am Strong.

Spotlight – Lamar Hardwick – The A2A Alliance | From Adversity to Advocacy

http://a2aalliance.org/a2a-spotlight/spotlight-lamar-hardwick/