Kelly Rae Roberts's Blog, page 54

the freedom, the fourth.

It's not lost on me that the idea of being a Possibilitarian is deeply rooted in the history of my country. We believe in it, were built upon its principles, and celebrate it in the stories of those who live here, who seek refuge here, who work hard each day to protect its ideals....every day. I am deeply grateful for the blessing of simply being born in this country and so proud to celebrate it's independence today - an independence that began with an idea and many, many Possibilitarians.

How Cute Is That: Desktop Suitcase

How Cute Is That? is my mom’s favorite expression — and our ongoing home decor & DIY series. From aprons to attics to alternative offices, we’re breathing new life into anything old, sharing inspired ideas, and spinning mismatched scraps into charming decor. And YES, you can try this at home!

Kelly Rae: When I was setting up my office in a closet a couple of years ago, my mom suggested I use a suitcase to hold office supplies. A suitcase? I never got around to it, but I finally took her up on the suggestion when I moved into my new office.



Mom: I had this extra suitcase around the house - it's not vintage, but rather a new one that I purchased from Pier One years and years ago - and offered it to Kelly Rae to use on her desk. I think a vintage suitcase would be super cute too.

Kelly Rae: What I love about this idea is that the suitcase has pockets to hold stuff, and it's all right there, in easy view. I see suitcases like this at TJ Maxx and stores like that all the time. I love this idea! New or old suitcases could work...



Photo credit: Tiffany Kirchner-Dixon
Kelly Rae: I love it! Holds all my notebooks and pens and office supplies I grab on a constant basis. And it totally cutefies my desk, too. Practical + cute = awesome.

Mom: How seriously cute is that?


What you guys think? Do you have fun ideas for desk organization? We'd love to hear them!

Click here to see all posts in the How Cute Is That series. 

Hello, Inspired.

Hello, hearts everywhere. I decided to make a home for the best of the best found hearts. Makes me happy (and inspired) to have them all collected together.





Speaking of hearts....Inspired by sweet packages in the mail that make for super fun outfits and hand cut hearts falling out of the package and onto the floor and a sweet toddler True exclaiming "hearts!" and "happppyyyyy!"




Inspired by this recent scene in our front and back yards. We're getting new sod and True could not be happier watching all the action and trucks. I love that he is teaching me all about boy stuff and how much they loooovvveee trucks and tools. I had no idea how boy boys can be!



Inspired by togetherness....



And birthday road trips that scream Oregon's beauty. Windows down. Wind flying. Just the two of us on a little solo adventure (our first without True). We even saw three white wild horses - on my birthday which happened to be the Solstice. I don't believe in coincidences. I believe in messages.



We stopped along the way and I sat and read on the rocks while John fly fished. Total dream.



Inspired that this sign continues to make it's way out into the world. Click here if you want to download and print it and paste all over your neighborhoods, stores, offices, lunch rooms, and more. You will be so glad you did. I just know it



Inspired by the pursuit of being true. In any circumstance. In any mood. Practice, practice....that's what I'm doing over here, especially on those really hard days.


Also currently inspired by:- The coolest idea I've seen in a long time. I'm totally doing this and I so hope our neighborhood families do it too. Thanks to Jess for the initial link.

- Am I the last to know about these? This one is my favorite.

- Recently had brunch and a coaching session (my first!) with her and walked away with boatloads of inspiration, information, and awesome strategies.

- Girl crush of the week: Her and here's a good reason why.

How are you guys? What's inspiring you lately. Do share!

Weekend Spotlight Love

Weekend Spotlight Love is a weekly series that features my amazing sponsors. Want to reach 150,000+ Possibilitarians with your business message – every month? Become a Sponsor – all the details are right over here.
 
************** Sleep and Her Sisters
Katherine is the short, curly haired, New Zealand artist behind Sleep and her Sisters. She works part time from her kitchen table in the sunny Hawke's Bay where she likes watching clouds, buying apple flavoured lollies and often thinks about the day she had lunch in Paris.

She loves to create with pretty much anything that she can make a mark with, but especially white paint {for painting those clouds}.

She has recently discovered the world of surface pattern design and has fallen completely head over heels in love with multiplying everything {except mushrooms, she's not so fond of them}.

You can connect with Katherine through
Facebook  |  Twitter  |  Blog
**************Illuminating Words


I am Helen Lewis, the artist and owner of Illuminating Words. I bring my love of letters and words -- both the visual aspect of their shape, and the beauty and impact of their meaning -- to my calligraphy, mixed-media collage, encaustic, and design work. I am fascinated with the curve of an E, the elegance of old script, the crisp look of type marching across a page. I love the stirring in my heart as I read a meaningful quotation or line from a poem.

In my pieces, I combine my own lettering and painting with various ephemera, including snippets from old books and dusty hymnals, treasured correspondence from earlier centuries, pieces of vintage sheet music or wallpaper, and character-filled faces from old photographs. Recently, I am particularly focused on the luminous qualities that the encaustic medium brings to the surface as these elements are layered and fused together.

Please stop by my shop or my blog to see samples of my artwork. Email me to inquire about commissioned pieces incorporating your favorite quotes or family photos.

You can connect with Helen through
Etsy  |  Email  |  Blog
************** Sacred Cake

Assemblage Jewelry by Jennifer Valentine of Sacred Cake
You want the jewelry you wear to be meaningful and expressive. Not the latest fad. Not mass produced. Affordable. You want your jewelry to be like you…timeless and memorable. One of a kind.

How about something a bit different? Something with a history. Something with a special story…jewelry with a past, yet relevant to the present.

At Sacred Cake you will find affordable heirloom quality vintage assemblage jewelry combined with timeless appeal. Whether it is for your wedding, graduation, promotion, a gift, or for your everyday victories; look to me for personal service that you can always rely on to exceed your expectations and make you feel as special and as singular as you are.

There is only one you. There is only one Sacred Cake. Every piece tells a story. What will your story be?

*Kelly Rae readers receive free shipping + a special gift. Visit my etsy shop and enter the code “ONEOFAKIND” to receive your free shipping and your gift. I’d love for you to visit my blog for more simple projects, stories and inspiration.

You can connect with Sacred Cake through
Facebook  |  Twitter  |  Blog
**************
Big thanks to my sponsors! I'm honored to highlight their offerings. If you are interested in becoming a sponsor you can find out more information here.

The Possibilitarian Project: Jo Packham

The Possibilitarian Project is more than a blog series, it’s a movement. Because when you step forward as a Possibilitarian — and share the truth about how you created your beautifully messy, magnificently complicated & exquisitely joyful life and career — you give everyone else permission to dream bigger, be braver, and create what they want. And just like that, the impossible simply . . . . . isn’t.


I am crazy excited to launch this project today. It's been in my heart for years and has taken many shapes and forms before finally landing here after a long birthing process. 
I am thrilled to feature Jo Packham as our first feature. You may know Jo as the powerhouse behind the Where Women Create magazines, The Creative Connection Event and more, but underneath all that success is a woman who simply sees potential and possibility inside inspired ideas. I've had the pleasure of working with her on a handful of projects, and I admire her, look up to her, and am always amazed at how humble she is. 
I also love how she follows her inspiration all the way until completion - this is what makes her a Possibilitarian. She has many great ideas and she simply ushers them through their journey, like a mama birthing a spirit into the world, until those ideas have reached their fullest possibility. Sometimes those possibility-brithed ideas made it big, sometimes they didn't, but she always saw the potential, even when times were bleak. Read on and get ready to be inspired. 


Who were you before you became an out & proud Possibilitarian? What was your ‘early’ career, or ‘previous life’? 
I had 16 jobs before I was 18 ... scooping ice cream was the most memorable. I got married at 18, quit college and went to work to put my husband through college, graduate school, and 1 year of law school. Then I went back to college, and with special permission from the Dean, completed 5 years of college in 2 years. The Spring quarter of my 2nd year I got pregnant with my daughter. I had the baby, moved from Sacramento to Utah, opened a retail store - Apple Arts - with my best friend .... and my creative journey began.

What did you (secretly) long for, in that previous life? 
Something, but I was never certain exactly what it was or what that really meant. I just knew that there was something "more" for me. My dreams were not concrete or focused, it was simply an uneasy feeling that I could do more, be more. What I am doing today was a happenstance ... not a dream or a vision. It was never even a twinkle in my eye. It was one idea that lead to another and then another and then another. Even today, I have no focus or vision of what tomorrow will be or what I will work so hard for. It is simply that all of a sudden I have a great idea and then I am relentless in its pursuit and fulfillment.

Was there a pivotal moment when everything shifted? What happened? When I met my best friend Martha. My husband was in law school in Sacramento. I had no friends, no car, no money, and I was so not happy. I decided to take a class at the local high school - they had night classes for adults. By the time I found out about the program they had only one class with an opening - a class called Batik. At the time I didn't even know what Batik was, but I didn't care. I had to get out of our house and meet someone. I went to class, sat on the back row, and in walked Martha. She sat down next to me, we became instant friends, and she introduced me to the world of handmade. If you were Martha's friend then you did what Martha loved, there was no discussion about it, so for 3 years we took every class up and down the California coast in everything from knitting, to basket weaving, to quilting and she gave me her gift of passion for those who create with their hands and their hearts.


When that pivotal moment arrived, how did you gather the courage to cross the threshold into a Possibilitarian life & career? It is interesting because for me there is no courage, not even any forethought really. I am doing something, either by myself or with someone, I get an idea, and I just begin to do whatever it takes to make it what I think it (the idea)  can be. A retail store, books, manufacturing product, licensing, blogs, magazines. I have never had a 5 year plan, never even a vision of the steps to creating anything. I can only  "see" the ultimate possibilities of the" idea of the moment". And I never think about the next step and what that should be. Every step is just like walking for me ... you do it without thinking about it or even know that you are doing it ... it is what it is. You need to get someplace so you just begin by taking one step at a time all the while seeing only the idea complete.


Where are you NOW? What have you created, what’s on the horizon, and how have you been applauded & recognized for your work? Right NOW I am in a place that not even I could ever dream of ... I have never been so happy, so inspired, just so lucky to be doing what I am doing.

*I had a retail store that sold art supplies to a college, which led to being one of the first companies to design and self-publish cross-stitch books. For about 10 years we sold millions of books and won every award given for design, sales, booth displays, being an entrepreneur, and more.

*The bottom fell out of the soft-bound, self-published needlework market so I went to work with the "big" publishers, Oxmoor House and Meredith to begin and then later Rodale, Time-Warner, Sterling, B&N, Chronicle, and others. I sold millions more of hard-bound how-to craft books in all categories. Again, won every award for booth displays, new product, being an entrepreneur, etc. We then manufactured lines of our own product that went with our books (which included a line of hand-painted, hand molded, shortbread flower cookies), and licensed with greeting card and gift companies.

*We lost everything one more time and built it back this time adding 3 award winning retail stores and a commitment to building the historic district of our community (established the Historic 25th Street Merchants Association, won many community awards, built the largest Christmas Celebration in Utah, chaired the Arts Council for our 75th 4th of July Celebration and had 75 life-size fiberglass horses painted by local artists.) By this time, it's 2005.

* The years from 2005 to today are really the most impactful of my 30 year career. In 2009, we started the magazines (which is such a story in and of itself).) Also started writing and packaging books again, licensing again, and began the process of manufacturing and creating my own product lines. I am also working on a blog that I hope will be one of those that becomes a go-to place for the hard questions in regards to being an entrepreneur ... as well as being a place of inspiration. We are building a community of exceptional, inspirational, successful women whose parts are equally as valuable as the sum of the whole.

 

What’s ONE piece of advice or encouragement you’d give to someone who’s facing their own pivotal moment, right now? 

It simply cannot be ONE piece of advice for me. It has to be:

1. Believe that there isn't anything you cannot do, you simply need to learn how.
2. Do your homework.
3. NEVER take "NO" for an answer ... just keep asking the questions until you understand how to "fix" it, make it, sell it, and above all ... be successful at it!


Big thanks to Jo for allowing me to feature her! You can find her on her website and Facebook page.
PS: Buttons and Badges for you! Feel free to grab these and put in your sidebars, posts, etc. I just as that you kindly link back to this page so others can join in on the fun. xxo!


Need a smaller size button or badge. We've got you covered. 
Do YOU know a brave, tender & wildly inspiring person . . . someone who has created their dream life & career, on their own courageous terms? Nominate them for The Possibilitarian Project!

Cuff Bracelets Are Here!

THE CUFF BRACELETS HAVE ARRIVED!!!!!!!!RIGHT HERE.

Update: Many of these have sold out since sending out the newsletter yesterday (thanks, friends), but I'm keeping this post updated with those that have sold out and those that are still available...

Update: Sold out

Update: Sold out


Update: Sold out


STILL A COUPLE LEFT!


STILL A COUPLE LEFT!


Update: Sold out


Update: Sold out


STILL A COUPLE LEFT!


Update: Sold out


STILL A COUPLE LEFT!


Update: Sold out


Update: Sold out


Update: Sold out


Update: Sold out

They're here. They're freaking gorgeous. And they are my favorite product launch EVER.

I have them in the shop, just for you. Just this once.
Limited quantities (about 300 total - a good amount!)

Made with love from me and my lovely partner, Demdaco.

Go get em!
xo
ps:

ps: If the one you want has sold out, don't dismay! The good folks over at Garden Gallery Works are selling them in their online store. If it looks like they've sold out over there, too, don't worry, they'll have more in stock VERY soon.
(comments closed)

Ask Kelly Rae:

You ask. I share. We talk.Ask Kelly Rae is your chance to prompt me with your thoughtful, soulful & beautifully complex questions about just about anything! Art, love, relationships, friendships, business, creativity, home decor, where I got my cowgirl boots — the doors are wiiiide open. Click here to submit a question for a future post. And enjoy today’s conversation . . .



Q: Dear Kelly Rae, I was reading about how you felt when you moved into your new studio and how it affected your productivity and your overall sense of balance.  I realize that this amazing step wasn't realized until 5 years into your business, so my question is; until you were able to have that dream, what are some tidbits of advice or ways of dealing in terms of schedule and discipline etc. that you put in place in order to actually get some work done at your at home studio?

I love this question. Because we all struggle with all things time management, scheduling, and discipline whether we work from home, not from home, have kids, or don't have kids. It is something that I'm always talking about with my friends and it's something that I'm in a constant state of practice about. What I'm finding is that some weeks require more movement and flexibility (for creative projects) while some require super clear rigid focus (to actually get stuff done).

Now that I have a work space outside of the home, the struggle looks differently than it did when I worked from home.  But today, I'll share what worked for me when I had my studio/office at home.


1. Separate your time in conscious ways. Meaning, when you're with your kids, you're WITH your kids (physically, mentally, spiritually). No checking emails, no surfing facebook biz pages, no checking in with work AT ALL - even during naps. I find that this helps me stay focused and less scattered as I move in and out of mama world and biz world. If I have True in the mornings, I try (really hard) not to enter work world during our time together. It can wait until the afternoon or its dedicated schedule that I've created for it. Otherwise I never quite feel at peace or in the present moment when I'm with him. When he's napping, I use that time to rest, read a magazine, sit in the sun, call a friend, house chores - anything that doesn't pull me into biz world. That said, I'm human. Sometimes (sometimes), when he's napping (esp now that naps are longer), I'll check in and answer anything urgent in my inbox, but I usually regret it. 

The same goes for work. When I'm working, I'm WITH my work (physically, mentally, spiritually) - no phone calls (I almost never answer my cell when working), no interruptions (unless I'm really needed as a mama/friend/wife/etc), no lollygagging around (though I do love to lollygag - just not when I need to focus). I currently work 3-4 days/week (some afternoons, some mornings = about 30hrs/week) which isn't a ton of time considering all that there is to do. How do I get it all done? I'm hyper focused during those hours (more below). Since starting a family and letting go of my 60+ hour work weeks, I'm AMAZED at what I can get done in four focused hours. Amazed.

Bottom line? Defined work times, defined family times. Resist crossing into work world when you are in family world. Resist crossing over into family world when you are in work world. The result: you're truly inside the moment in whatever world you are in and that kind of peace is priceless.

2. Housework. Let it go. If you can, hire a housekeeping service. We have someone who comes in twice/month for all the deep cleaning. We swiffer in between and sometimes our laundry only gets done once/month. Our current routine is to spend about 20 minutes at the end of the day picking up the house, putting stuff away, loading the dishwasher, and generally putting the house back together again after a toddler has thoroughly and joyfully created chaos. This helps us stay on top of things so that the house doesn't get super out of control, but we've let the super clean house that we used to have pre business and pre baby go. I'd rather be remembered for the work I did in the world as a parent and as an artist vs having a really clean house.

Photo Credit: Tiffany Kirchner-Dixon3. The down and dirty time management plan: In a nutshell, my strategy is this when it comes to getting work done:

1. Make a goal (small, big, ginormous)
2. Write down every single tiny detailed step that must happen in order to achieve that goal
3. Schedule every single one of those tiny detailed steps into my weekly work schedule. Sometimes, when I'm all done scheduling in those tiny steps I'm just a couple weeks away from reaching that goal, sometimes months - depends on the size of the goal and how much time I have to devote to work each week.
4. If I can't get to xyz step on any particular week, I simply move it to the next week. I keep doing this until I reach the goal.
This is exactly how small steps lead to amazingness, as evidenced here.

4. Motion = Progress = Success = Imperfect. Motion means putting your work out into the world, even if it's not perfect. For me this means no more super edited blog posts (which means many typos, etc - ah well), or finely crafted newsletters, or lots of preparation. I simply don't have the time. I'm learning to simply get it out there - no waiting for the perfect time, or when it feels more finished or or or. Just get it out, so that you can make room and time (in your heart and in your schedule) for the next step, whether that's another painting, another blog post, another newsletter, etc etc. Motion, however simple or small, means progress. And progress, my friends, is success. Plain + Simple.

Ps: Perfectionism stops motion (i.e. progress, success) in every way.

XO
Kelly Rae

Happy Announcements

Hi friends,
I've got what feels like a million things to tell you. I'll start with the most important:

BRACELETS ARE HERE!



The cuff bracelets have arrived, friends. And. They. Are. Awesome. I couldn't resist selling these in my shop, so please sign up for the newsletter if you want to know exactly when they go on sale (it will be sometime this week). I've got limited quantities of these beauties and they'll go fast. Seriously IN LOVE with these and happy happy to offer them up!

FACEBOOK CHAT TOMORROW!I'm trying something a bit new....I’m hosting my first Facebook chat tomorrow, June 26th, at 1pm PST. Wanna chat with me and fellow Possibilitarians about anything and everything? It’s a date. See you there! I've also started offering FB only giveaways, sales, and more. I heart you, Facebook tribe. Yes, yes I do. 


E-COURSE REGISTRATION OPEN! I run this e-course once a year and it’s always a huge hit. The next class starts Monday, Sept 10, 2012 – this will be the only time I run this popular ecourse in 2012. Do you want to start/grow/expand your creative business? Do you want to connect with other creative people? Click here for all the details (including registering for the 2012 class!). I love this class. Major treat for me to run it again. All content will be thoroughly updated from the previous two sessions as I've learned a lot since starting this course in 2010. Come join us! 


NEW SPONSORSHIP PROGRAM

I am excited to finally announce my new sponsorship program. I’m pretty sure I was a professional matchmaker, in another life. I LOVE connecting my readers with uplifting & inspiring businesses that share my Possibilitarian mission.
If you . . .: Believe that kindness changes everything
: Have a business, a product, a tool or an offering to share
: Would love to reach 150K monthly readers & 15K mailing list subscribers with your message. . . then you’re beautifully suited for a sponsorship spot, on my site.  Click here for all the details. NEWSLETTER


I've totally and completely revamped the structure and look of my newsletter. I'm loving it! If you'd like to receive weekly-ish love notes, sign up for the newsletter. I promise to keep your email address locked in a digital vault, and never-ever share it with mean people.

I also promise . . .
: To fill your inbox with uplifting, inspiring, possibility-fueled messages and artwork about once a week.
: To make sure you’re the first to know about new e-courses, big sales, original paintings, and more.
: To do everything I can — with all my virtual powers — to remind you that beauty is mandatory, and that kindness changes everything.

AND FINALLY: NEW AROUND HERE OR AN OLD FRIEND? Photo by Viv McMasterI've been doing some major updating around here. There’s a lot to explore, here in my virtual home — 7 years of blog content, print books & ebooks, courses & workshops & artwork for sale, hundreds of posts & thousands of photos. Lots & lots of love.
If you’re new to my online world — or maybe an old friend, coming ‘round to say hello again — here’s a little breadcrumb trail to help you find your way around. 
Enjoy to the fullest. I’m really happy you’re here.
Kelly Rae

Weekend Spotlight Love

[image error]
Weekend Spotlight Love is a weekly series that features my amazing sponsors. Want to reach 150,000 Possibilitarians with your business message – every month? Become a Sponsor – all the details are right over here.
 
**************
Superhero Photo

This six-week course lives in that oh-so-sweet spot between creativity and personal growth. My favorite place to be! I believe that creativity is an access point for finding our courage, our intuition and learning to trust ourselves. 

What will the course cover?
Different themes each week – Portraits, Treasures, Composition, Self-portraiture, Color, etc.Technical lessons – In aperture, lighting, composition and post-processing and more!Treasure hunts – A downloadable PDF of creative photo prompts to inspire and delightInspiring interviews with super talented photographers – Tracey Clark, Vivienne McMaster, Anna Kuperberg, Andrea (Hula) Jenkins, and Tara WhitneyPlus a warm and encouraging community space on Flickr to share our work!This online, self-paced course begins Monday, July 9th and costs $99. Click here to register.  

You can also connect with Andrea through
Facebook  |  Twitter  |  Blog
************** 
Joanne Sharpe: Artist, Teacher, Designer 
It's been a dream in the making, to get up the courage to learn all the technology to teach online classes in creative lettering and art journaling. Mission accomplished! With great enthusiasm, i am happy to announce that my online classes are now open! Chuck full of "Whimspirations"…life, lettering, art and experience… these playful workshops offer colorful inspiration, artful lettering and whole lot of whimsey! It's an honor to share my creative passions with others teaching online classes. My reward comes in watching my students artfully empowered, embracing their own creative voice and defining their personal style in lettering and art journaling. Read their testimonials here.

Come see what I'm crazy excited about in "Letter Love 101: Art Journals", an online art journaling class with an intense focus on authentic personal hand lettering. Or maybe you just want to make letters? Then join me for "Artful Alphabets" and learn 1300 new letter forms in 25 alphabets for your artwork and journaling. Can't wait to meet you!

You can also connect with Joanne through
Facebook  |  Flickr  |  Blog
**************
Big thanks to my sponsors! I'm honored to highlight their offerings. If you are interested in becoming a sponsor you can find out more information here.

From The Archives: Then + Now

From The Archives is a series where I look back, dust off curated posts from long ago and present them to you, with new purpose. I believe in remembering who we are, who we wanted to be. For me, looking back is a thoughtful way to lean into how far we've traveled, how the lessons still ring true, how old insights and wisdom become new again.
***********I wrote the following post in the summer of 2009 - a time when I was feeling some serious pressure of a life taking off without me. Inspiration (In-Spirit) was at the helm and in some ways it felt (and still does at times) I was just along for the ride. My line of products had released earlier that year and were quickly embraced by retailers and finding their way into stores nationwide. It was an unexpected step (truly) and I was a full-on newbie in the world of operating a rapidly growing creative business. I also just never imagined my art would be seen by so many people. So, the pressure came from navigating the feelings of not just my art being widely exposed, but my heart. As a sensitive (growingly introverted) person, I was struggling with the energy and forces coming toward me in all capacities: pressure to make art for my licensing partners, pressure for that art to be accepted, pressure to make money, pressure to get pregnant, pressure to teach, pressure to leverage the biz momentum into something sustainable, pressure to be what people wanted me to be, or thought I was.

Big stuff.

Since then (three years!), I've found my way on more solid ground on these pressure points. But the pressure most definitely is still there. These days it's more of a dance between mamahood and biz. The pressure to do both, and to do both really well. That, and marriage, friendships, self-care. As I read back on this post, I'm proud of this girl who allowed herself to feel the vulnerabilities and the fear, and to keep going anyway, figuring it out as she breathed, taking some steps to protect herself from cracking under the pressures.

From the archives: originally written Aug, 2009:

(THEN: large painting. it reads she was grateful for the brightness of being alive NOW: it's been reworked into a newish print. )
in the spaces of the friction, i feel deeply loved. and protected. i'm just a girl navigating the next step, intimacy vs armor, creative longings, and some pretty intense pressure. sometimes it all feels like a whirlwind with unseen forces spiraling toward me, at me, all around. the energy is good, but overwhelming. my linear brain can't make sense, my creative side frazzled and undone. my gratitude is huge, but i sometimes feel lonely, like i'm pioneering a new road for myself as i try to grab ahold of what's left to keep from behind. it's all very hard to wrap my head around. the language comes in broken stream, both to my heart and to those i hold close.

still, my friends call, and my husband gently tends. i try to explain. i explain my way through. and through again. i accept the comfort, all of it. i allow myself the tears, the release. and try very very hard not to restrict myself to only five minutes of falling apart, but perhaps more time. our hearts don't work well with deadlines, i remind myself. through all the muck, i'm acutely aware of the shine and sheen of my life. and i'm grateful beyond measure for the brightness of my crazy life, of being alive. i'm one lucky girl, cracked open heart and all.