Lindsay Detwiler's Blog, page 47

Glitterize!!!!! How to Wear Sequins and Glitter Without Looking Weird

A few days ago, my Mom made a statement that horrified me—“ I can’t buy that because it has sequins.” When probed further, she told me that one of her magazine articles noted that after a certain age, you should avoid sequins.

As an almost thirty-year-old, I was horrified. First of all, I love sequins. But second, since when did trends only apply to certain age groups? I think that any trend, anything you truly love in fashion, can be pulled off at any age—as long as you keep it within reason.

So, from the sequin and glitter girl herself, here are some tips for how to incorporate sparkle into your wardrobe and style without looking like a disco ball, a bag lady, or a twelve-year-old girl.

Accent plain clothes with a pop of sequins

An all-over sequined dress may be a bit much unless you are eighteen or are at a New Year’s Eve party. However, we all have those plain sweaters or shirts that have a deep V. Instead of putting a plain cami underneath, try putting a sparkly, sequined tank top underneath. This will give you a pop of the trend without looking overdone. If you keep the sequined tank neutral, it will really make it look manageable, even in the corporate world. These tanks are from Old Navy and were about $10. I also have them in hot pink, turquoise, and royal blue for days I really want to play up the sequins.

Add some shimmer to your makeup

I remember the days when I would go to Claire’s and buy tubes of glitter to plaster on my face. There was even glitter hairspray. I am not a proponent of glitterizing your face and hair, but I do think you can add some sparkle. My top picks are Too Faced blush, which has just a perfect amount of teeny, tiny glitter specs to give you some shimmer. I also like Bare Minerals “Secret Radiance,” an all-over face product that is like a mineral veil.

Your nails

Not feeling the glitter/sequin trend in your wardrobe? Move it to your nails. You know I’m a fan of Jamberry, and this is their July stylebox color. Even if you paint your nails, try painting just one nail in pure glitter to give it a pop.

Your shoes

Shoes are a great place to add sequins if you’re not super confident about the trend. These flats are from JC Penney’s and were only around $10. Penney’s has a great selection of cheap, comfortable shoes in their hanging flats section, so check it out.

Headbands

If you have long hair that you wear up, spice up your updo with a sparkley headband. Worried about looking like you are five? Keep the headband neutral, or find one that just has a single glittery gem. I’m not a morning person, so I have many days where I just throw my hair into a crappy bun. Add a headband and you will get instant compliments. In fact, I get more hair compliments on days I have a terrible, frizzy bun and a headband than on days I tediously straighten it. Be sure to keep all other jewelry to a minimum so you don’t look overdone.

And, if you’re feeling the sequin trend . . . just go for it! There is no age limit on fashion. End of story.

Show off your favorite sequined or glittering items below!

Lindsay Detwiler, Voice of Innocence

Love Notes: Tips for a Mostly Successful Marriage

People sometimes ask me why I chose to write love stories. I suppose a major reason is because I very much believe in love. Perhaps that is because I have a unique love story all my own.

As you know, Chad and I met when we were twelve. We were together all through junior high, high school, and the college years. In total, we have known each other for fifteen years now, and in October, we will have been married for four.

Our family and friends will tell you that this does not mean we have the perfect relationship or that we’ve figured it all out. We get mad at each other (daily), we fight, we drive each other crazy. Gone are the days of surprise flowers and romantic dates. In short, we are not relationship experts.

However, as we’ve been thinking about it, maybe that’s okay. Maybe the fact that we are just two average people figuring out love is actually valuable. We’ve learned how to make it work through our awkward stages, through changes in our lives, and through major triumphs. We’ve stayed together as we maneuvered through different life stages, as we grew up, and as we wanted to walk away. We’ve laughed along the way, we’ve screamed at each other, we’ve asked ourselves why sometimes . . . and yet we’re still together.

This new segment on my Youtube channel is just an experiment right now. It’s going to be called Love Notes. It isn’t about us telling you how adorable we are together or how we know everything about marriage. It’s actually quite the opposite. In this segment, we will be candidly talking about our relationship observations, things we’ve experienced, and tips we have. If you’re looking for psychologists or a serious talk about theories behind marriage, well, this isn’t the video for you. If you want some insight, however, into what it takes to stay together through years and years, if you want some humor (thanks to Chad, of course), and if you want real life discussions about what it means to be in a contemporary monogamous relationship, then check out the video below. As I said, it’s just an experiment, and we would love some feedback :) If nothing else, it will give you a look into my life and allow you to see where my perceptions of love come from.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCmKDMsNPHE

Lindsay Detwiler, author of Voice of Innocence

Lord of the Flies Analysis

I recently reread Lord of the Flies by William Golding because that’s the first book I’ll be teaching come August (I know, August? It should be a curse word at this point in the summer :) ). I decided to make a video in case anyone out there has to read it for a summer reading list. In the video, I just give some things to think about when analyzing Lord of the Flies. Don’t worry fellow teachers . . . I didn’t give anything away. In fact, I probably gave students more questions to ponder than answers :)

Lorac Contour Palette

I can check one item off of my beauty bucket list for the summer: contouring.

At Ulta today, they were having special Lorac contouring lessons. I almost passed it up, but then decided to give it a try since I’ve been wanting to learn. I ended up (of course) buying the palette.

The Lorac contouring palette was $45 at Ulta, but the great thing is that it came with the contouring brush. As a bonus, it also came with an eyeshadow primer (I love freebies).

I am definitely still working on the technique, and I think it will be a while until I get confident. However, I really like this palette because the colors work on me even though I’m very fair. I feel like the results are subtle; my mom described it as a sun-kissed look. However, it definitely adds some definition to my cheek bones and overall facial structure. With the right blush, it just makes your makeup look that much better. Plus, I didn’t think it was too hard to accomplish. The biggest secret is to blend . . . a lot! The girl who helped me today said that you should blend upward to get the most natural effect.

Before (on the left) and After my contouring attempt

She showed me the most basic steps, which I’m still working on.

Step 1: Use two fingers to find your cheek bones. Lightly brush on the bronze color from your temple down your cheek bone. Stop once you’ve reached the area of your cheek bone directly under the center of your eye. Blend, blend, blend. Your contour line shouldn’t be any wider than two fingers.

Step 2: Blend some of the bronze color into your hairline.

Step 3: Lightly streak some of the bronze down the sides of your nose and on the tip of your nose. Blend.

Step 4: Use the light color to make an inverted triangle under your eyes. You can also run some down the center of your nose and on the center of your chin.

Step 5: Put the really shimmery color under your eyebrows and on your cupid’s bow.

It sounds harder than it is, honestly! And if you use the lightest colors in the palette, there’s not a lot to worry about.

Have you tried contouring yet? Do you have any great tips to share? Comment below!

Meet Chad, the Inspiration Behind Corbin

If you’ve read Voice of Innocence, you know that Corbin is basically the perfect case of “opposites attract” when it comes to his love for Emma. Such is the case in my own relationship with my husband Chad. In this video, I introduce you to Chad, the inspiration for the personality of Corbin. I interview Chad, giving you a sample of how he influenced the character and also giving you more insight into who I am as a person and writer.

Lindsay Detwiler, Voice of Innocence

Author Event . . . And Coffee!

Just a reminder that this Saturday, July 18th, I will be having an author event at Standing Stone Coffee Company, 1229 Mifflin St., Huntingdon, PA 16652, from 10am to noon. Come buy a copy of Voice of Innocence at a SPECIAL PRICE OF JUST $10! Yes, I’m breaking out the discount just because I’m so excited for this event! You can talk to me about the book or even bring a copy you already bought to get it signed.

Buy some coffee, buy a book, and set yourself up for the perfect Saturday afternoon! I know I’ll be getting my caffeine fix while I’m there!

I hope to see you Saturday!

Lindsay Detwiler, Author of Voice of Innocence

Writing IS Worth It

I write to give a voice to the characters brewing in my head. I write to bring life to people, to situations, to relationships that don’t exist in the real world but should. I write to inspire someone, to connect with someone, to show someone that he or she isn’t the only one feeling something. If I do that for one person, I’ve accomplished my mission. I write because I have no choice in it. These words swirl in my head, waiting to come out. I write because they call to me, they plead with me, they demand to be heard. I write because it’s who I am at the core.

It’s scary being a writer, especially as an English teacher. I was terrified to say to people, “I’m an author.” In fact, for a long time, even after my book was out, I would hesitate on the “author” part, choosing to say “I write books,” instead. I couldn’t understand how to associate myself with the title of author. I was afraid to be judged, to put myself out there, to share these ideas that had been in my mind. Being an author carries some weight with it, some sense that what you have to say is worthy of others. It’s like taking your innermost views of life, of people, of everything in this world and putting it out there to be judged. You risk people saying, “You see the world incorrectly.” You risk people saying, “You’re odd.” You risk people saying, “You don’t know what you’re doing.” Writing is a huge risk, which isn’t something people think about. But I did. I thought about how the greats are judged. I thought about how I wasn’t anywhere near being Poe, Shakespeare, Gilman, or Sparks. Being an author was a lot of pressure, and I didn’t feel worthy of the title.

But then, slowly, the author in me emerged. I realized that a star rating didn’t make me a writer. I realized that I didn’t have to have paparazzi or bestselling status or awards on my book cover to make me a true writer. I didn’t have to be Poe or Shakespeare to be a writer. I didn’t have to have a perfect worldview or a perfect vocabulary or even perfect grammar to be a writer.  I already was one. The minute that pen went to paper, I was a writer. I was an author. I was everything in between.

There is still judgement to be faced. There are still critics who argue, “I could do that,” or “Really? This isn’t literature,” or “You spelled that wrong.” There are critics ready to burst out their red pen, to say “that couldn’t happen.”  But I’ve realized that is okay. It’s okay if not everyone likes what I say or how I say it or when I say it in my works. It’s humbling, yes, but it’s okay. Everyone has the right to judge literature; I just don’t have to let that judgement affect who I am as a writer.

Because that’s not why I write. I write because I have to, because I can’t give up on these characters, these stories. I write because I want to give people hope that they have something worth saying, too. I want people to realize that you don’t have to be a prodigy or do something crazy with words to be a master writer. I want my students to realize that you can face criticism, harsh words, and all kinds of negative things, but still keep your head held high. I want to show them what it is to be strong, to believe in yourself, to keep going even when you’ve lost faith in yourself.

I write to show others that words are power, no matter what they look like on a page. I write to show others that writing is about connecting, stirring emotions, and making sense of this crazy journey called life. It’s not about making millions or being famous. It’s not about having people bow to you as a literary god or goddess. It’s simply about connection. It’s about making someone feel something, good or bad. It’s about making someone care enough to make a statement about your writing, good or bad.

So whether you have a platform of one or one million, write. Write because it’s who you are. Write because you have something to say. Write in spite of criticism and rejection. Write because of criticism and rejection. Writing is personal, it’s scary, it’s risky, and it’s tough. But trust me, I’ve learned one thing on this journey.

Writing is worth it.

Lindsay Detwiler, author of Voice of Innocence

My Soul Cat

On a blustery November day two years ago, I met the cat who would teach me how precious life is. I know, it sounds lofty and cheesy. If you hate cats, then this probably isn’t the post for you. But if you know what it’s like to bond with an animal and you have a special place in your heart for rescues, then maybe this is.

I had just suffered a terrible loss. My absolute favorite cat, my soul cat if you will, had disappeared a month ago. We had sent out the search crews and found nothing. She was very old, so we figured she had gone off to die like some cats do. I was beside myself, so my husband decided to take me to the Humane Society and pick out a new cat.

Tears welling as soon as we entered the building (it’s an instantaneous reaction), I was nervous. I felt terrible having to pick just one animal from the dozens there. I spent over an hour going cage to cage, looking for a cat and hoping to find a connection. I had my heart set on a male cat, so I quickly overlooked a small black cat. She kept crying at me, batting at me; she knew what I didn’t. She was destined to go home with me.

After holding cat after cat and not feeling a connection (my husband thought I was insane at this point), I decided to give the bawling cat a try. As soon as I held her, I knew. She wrapped her paws around my neck and clung on. She was going home with us.

Sophia had been at the Humane society for several months. A stray, the workers believed she had been abandoned by her mother as evidenced by the fact that she was super clingy. After some paperwork and a few days of processing, we picked up my new “soul” cat on November 17th, my husband’s birthday.

Sophia and I instantly bonded. She followed me everywhere, sat on the couch with me, and slept with her paws wrapped around my neck. She was the sweetest cat I could have asked for, and I was so happy that we would have so many years together. She just exuded appreciation for her home, loving every toy, every treat, every pet we gave her.

We celebrated Christmas, New Year’s, and my birthday. And then disaster struck in February.

She started acting aloof, not wanting to be held. She spent the day sleeping by the radiator. After a trip to the vet, they thought that she ate something harmful that was now lodged in her intestines. They operated and found nothing. Thinking she must be okay, they sent her home with some pills.

As luck would have it, we had huge snow storms that week, so I was off school many days. Sophia and I spent the week on the couch together reading Harry Potter and watching television. I had no way of knowing it would be my last week with my best friend.

At the end of the week, she started acting very ill. At the vet, they again did some tests and found something horrifying; she had FVP, a terminal illness. Although some cats can live years with it, others find themselves at the vet every few weeks or months from this disease that can affect the brain, lungs or intestines. It was creating immense pain for Sophia, and there was no cure. Worst of all, it was highly contagious and would spread to our other two cats.

We were faced with a horrific prognosis from the vet: the most humane decision we could make for her and our other cats was to put her down.

That February day was the worst I’ve experienced. I had to say goodbye to my best friend, a cat that wasn’t even a year old. I still get teary eyed thinking about it. I bawled for days, cried for weeks, and was heartbroken for months.

I still have a picture of Sophia on my mirror that I look at every day. This sounds morbid, right? Again, my husband thinks I’m crazy. But you know what? That picture is so important to me. First of all, I don’t ever want to forget Sophia, this already forgotten cat. She spent months of her life forgotten by the world on the street. I love that I got to adopt her, that her life mattered to me. I’ve vowed to never forget her. More importantly, she reminds me how fragile life is. You never know when things can change on a dime, so you have to appreciate every moment. Sophia had a short life; she wasn’t even a year when she was put down. She spent the majority of her life on the street and then in a cage. However, she had four beautiful months with our family where she was loved.

To many, Sophia is just a black cat, and this is a melodramatic post (soul cats? Really?). But if you’ve ever bonded with an animal like I have, you get it. You get that they truly are family members, life-changing ones at that.

And even if you aren’t, Sophia is a simple reminder that life is short, whether you’re a cat or a human. So make sure you’re appreciating every moment, big or small, exciting or dull. Whether it’s a once in a lifetime vacation or a few hours on the couch, appreciate every breath.

RIP Sophia

At the Water’s Edge Review

At the Water’s Edge by Sara Gruen

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

“It seems there’s nothing so good or pure it can’t be taken without a moment’s notice.”

At the Water’s Edge is a tale of Maddie, a woman who is married to a well-to-do man who is trying to prove his worth. Essentially, Maddie is forced to go along on a “monster quest” with her husband Ellis and his best friend Hank. They are in search of the Loch Ness Monster because years ago, Ellis’s father ruined the family reputation by faking pictures of the creature. While away, Maddie comes to face many monsters, the least of her worries being Nessie.

The book is set against a backdrop of World War II, which only enriches and enlivens the text. Gruen seamlessly weaves the war into the story, giving the book an even stronger depth due to the history behind it. The plot of the book doesn’t center around the war, but the war certainly supports and highlights the themes of the work. From Ellis’s failure to enlist in the war to bombings to mentions of concentration camps, Maddie feels the impacts of this devastating time in history as she suffers her personal battles.

I found that I had absolutely nothing in common with Maddie from a social or cultural sense. The setting was far beyond my reach of personal knowledge, and Maddie’s presence in an affluent society was also very different from my own life. However, this is what I loved most about the book. Because it was such a different concept with foreign settings, places, and customs, I was entranced by the work. I was fascinated by the inundation of culture in the work, by the foreign places and characters. It made Maddie’s self-realizations even stronger because she was finding herself in a new and strange place. I liked watching her change because of the setting. I also liked exploring a different area of the world, a different time period, and a different way of life than what I am used to.

The book is told in first person, which also gives the novel a depth that is unmatched in many novels. Maddie’s complex emotions about the war, friendships, and her marriage are clearly revealed through the narrative pattern, allowing the reader to struggle along with the emotions of the tale right along with Maddie.

This novel isn’t just about a monster quest set in the 1940s, the Loch Ness Monster, or marriage. It’s about friendship, about moving on past tragedy, and about how we don’t have to let the past own us. There are many tragic events in the novel that keep it exciting and fast-paced. Even though it is told from first person point-of-view, it isn’t just an emotional look at the events or a psychological, introspective novel. There is a lot of action in the novel and many events that keep the reader intrigued.

Gruen has truly created another masterpiece equivalent if not stronger than Water for Elephants. Her ability to weave history with fiction while also exploring deep women’s issues makes her one of the greatest writers of our time.

View all my reviews

Lindsay Detwiler, author of Voice of Innocence

At the Water’s Edge: Video Review

You can check out my video review of Sara Gruen’s At the Water’s Edge here:

Lindsay Detwiler, Voice of Innocence