Steve Hely

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Steve Hely

Goodreads Author


Member Since
June 2008


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Nestlé gets the water for Arrowhead in the San Bernadino National Forest, owned by you and me, the American people.

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In 2016, Nestlé took 32 million gallons of water from the national forest, in an area not known for its abundance of fresh water.


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How much did they pay for this?  I found the answer in a recent issue of High Country News:


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$2,050?...

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Published on August 12, 2018 11:05
Average rating: 3.68 · 4,797 ratings · 1,016 reviews · 6 distinct worksSimilar authors
How I Became a Famous Novelist

3.68 avg rating — 3,353 ratings — published 2009 — 14 editions
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The Ridiculous Race: 26,000...

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3.73 avg rating — 1,007 ratings — published 2008 — 7 editions
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The Wonder Trail: True Stor...

3.52 avg rating — 431 ratings — published 2016 — 5 editions
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Cum am devenit un romancier...

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3.67 avg rating — 3 ratings — published 2009
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Die Wette: 42.000 km, 2 Män...

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liked it 3.00 avg rating — 2 ratings — published 2014
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나는 어떻게 유명한 소설가가 되었나

really liked it 4.00 avg rating — 1 rating — published 2009
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June 2016, Steve Hely
"Pack your bags! The Wonder Trail author knows the five hilarious and heartfelt books you need to bring on your next trip.
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Steve’s Recent Updates

Steve Hely wrote a new blog post



It’s 1539.  Henry VIII is 48 years old and single.  Wife 1 didn’t work out, Wife 2 got beheaded, Wife 3 died.  The Hunt For Wife 4 is on:

King Henr... Read more of this blog post »
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How I Became a Famous Novelist by Steve Hely
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The Rings of Saturn by W.G. Sebald
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Shibumi by Trevanian
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Fat City by Leonard Gardner
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What Every Person Should Know About War by Chris Hedges
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Memoirs of a Fox-Hunting Man by Siegfried Sassoon
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Education of a Wandering Man by Louis L'Amour
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The Irresponsible Self by James  Wood
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More of Steve's books…
“Writing a novel— actually picking the words and filling in paragraphs— is a tremendous pain in the ass. Now that TV’s so good and the Internet is an endless forest of distraction, it’s damn near impossible. That should be taken into account when ranking the all-time greats. Somebody like Charles Dickens, for example, who had nothing better to do except eat mutton and attend public hangings, should get very little credit.”
Steve Hely, How I Became a Famous Novelist

“I try not to hate anybody. "Hate is a four-letter word," like the bumper sticker says. But I hate book reviewers.

Book reviewers are the most despicable, loathsome order of swine that ever rooted about the earth. They are sniveling, revolting creatures who feed their own appetites for bile by gnawing apart other people's work. They are human garbage. They all deserve to be struck down by awful diseases described in the most obscure dermatology journals.

Book reviewers live in tiny studios that stink of mothballs and rotting paper. Their breath reeks of stale coffee. From time to time they put on too-tight shirts and pants with buckles and shuffle out of their lairs to shove heaping mayonnaise-laden sandwiches into their faces, which are worn in to permanent snarls. Then they go back to their computers and with fat stubby fingers they hammer out "reviews." Periodically they are halted as they burst into porcine squeals, gleefully rejoicing in their cruelty.

Even when being "kindly," book reviewers reveal their true nature as condescending jerks. "We look forward to hearing more from the author," a book reviewer might say. The prissy tones sound like a second-grade piano teacher, offering you a piece of years-old strawberry hard candy and telling you to practice more.

But a bad book review is just disgusting.

Ask yourself: of all the jobs available to literate people, what monster chooses the job of "telling people how bad different books are"? What twisted fetishist chooses such a life?”
Steve Hely, How I Became a Famous Novelist

“People will believe thousands of different lies in succession rather than confront a single scintilla of truth.”
Steve Hely

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