Barbara Schmidt's Blog, page 27

Five of the Best Things I’ve Learned

I like to describe myself as a student of life. I am always wanting to learn, grow, expand, and explore; and part of what I think my purpose in life is, is to pass along this knowledge to all of you.

As a student of life, I am not perfect. I try to practice what I preach, but being human, I slip up or fall back. I need my constant reminders and my positive reinforcements just like anyone else.

With all of this being said, up until this point in my journey, there are five core ideas that have really helped me live my own authentic life, serving my highest and greatest good. Think of this week’s message as a “super blog” if you will, as I’ll dish up what I believe to be the five best things I’ve learned while on this spiritual practice.

1.Cultivate your ability to trust, accept, and surrender. This has personally been my biggest lesson, so it is always in the back of my mind. We know we cannot control what happens to us in life. We cannot manipulate, force, or pressure anything into happening. In a lot of instances, I’ve learned this lesson the hard way and now I am a trust junkie.

2. Make yourself your priority. A tough one for many, but so important. You are the only “you” you have. How can you expect to live the amazing life you were born to live when you aren’t feeling your best? Mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally, take care of yourself. You’ll have so much more to give to the world when you are your priority.

3. Get out of your own way! Life is what we make of it, and so many times we create the havoc we so desire to let go of. Our anxious thoughts, mindless actions, and urgencies to please others can create confusing, stressful ways of existence. Take yourself out of the equation in this way, and do the work that you can to set yourself up for success. Incorporate healthy habits, find balance and stillness, do your best and be your best.

4. Don’t compare – like ever. Maybe my second biggest lesson, and one that I still struggle with on a daily basis. Theodore Roosevelt’s quote, “Comparison is the thief of joy” could not be any more true. No matter what arena, comparison is just a joy killer. Just don’t do it. Find something to bring your mind to if you begin to compare yourself to anyone else in this world. We are all so different and magnificent in our own ways. How can it conceivably make sense to compare yourself to another person? Coming back to lesson number one, trust that whoever you are is enough. You do you, and let everyone and everything else be as they are.

5. Be compassionate and loving as often as you can. We never really know what is going on in the lives of others. Do whatever you can to lift someone up rather than bring them down. From loved ones to strangers, treat each person as you would like to be treated. Be the ray of sunshine in someone else’s day.

Just when you thought I was all done for this week’s blog, fear not, I have a bonus! The sixth and super important thing to remember is…

6. Never underestimate the power of silence and stillness. Mindfulness, awareness, purposefulness, positivity, all stem from being still. When in doubt, sit with yourself in silence, focusing on your breath, and see what happens.

I hope these six lessons are as meaningful and helpful for you as they are for me. Let me know your thoughts! What are some lessons that really work and inspire you?

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How to Make the Best of a Bad Situation

Happy Sunday! We are almost half-way January, can you believe how fast time flies? Now that we are fully out of the holiday swing and back into the grind of regular life, we may start to feel a little down and dreary.

The holidays bring up so many emotions, mainly positive ones, that when it’s all over, we’re left to feel a little depleted. It’s also common to feel dissatisfied with the regular to do’s of daily life.

What I hear so often at this time of year is situational discontent in life. We’ve made resolutions, set goals, dreamed big; and now we are left with what we have right now, and for many of us, there’s a little bit of a let down that comes with that.

We want our lives to change for the positive right now, but our minds get caught up in a tailspin of wishful thinking and unhappiness with what is. Whether you’re feeling blue about a relationship, a job, your home, or your finances, I promise you there is always some sort of silver lining.

So this week, let’s talk about how to make the best of any situation you may be going through. Check out some tips below to find ways to get through anything with grace and ease.

1.Be the light. No matter how dark a situation may be, first start by trying to bring light to it. If you have a terribly mean boss or some dysfunction in your family, try to bring forth change, by being the change you wish to see. Negative doesn’t cancel out negative, positive does. Try it out!

2. Be heard. So many times we stuff down our thoughts and opinions for fear of negative repercussions. Use your voice, stand up for yourself and be heard! Be thoughtful, respectful, and honest, and share your input to promote change.

3. Be proactive. What can you do right now to make the situation better? Go inward and search for meaningful solutions or quick fixes to give yourself a positive boost. This may also mean, start researching ways to exit the situation or finding an alternative answer.

4. Be protected. Know where you stand and create boundaries. How much are you willing to take before you make the ultimate change? It’s great to always know where you stand so that you’re clear when it’s time to move on.

5. Be ready. Just like it’s great to know what your limits are, it’s also great to be mindful and ready on when the timing is right to make that change. If you’re wanting a new career, start exploring what makes your heart sing so that when the time is right you can transition with ease. The same goes for any other situation you’re dealing with. Preparation is key.

I hope these tips help you with any challenging situations you may be facing. I do have one caveat here. These tips are for you in the notion that you or your loved ones aren’t in any harm or danger; they simply are for bumps in the road. If you find yourself in a scary situation beyond your control, please seek help and aid from sources you trust.

Have a great week everyone! xoxo

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Breaking Down Your Blocks to Love

We all want to know ways that we can improve our romantic relationships, no matter if you’re happily married or single. Romantic love can bring up so many fearful and sabotaging emotions, so this week we are going to talk about how you can break through your own blocks to create a healthy, romantic love life. Oh la, la, exciting yes? Check out these tips below:

Know your own self-worth. Know how awesome you are, and truly believe that you deserve a partner that mirrors your awesomeness. It’s not selfish or vain to think this way, it’s telling the Universe you are ready energetically to pull in the right match. Same goes if you’re in a relationship, know where you stand, make yourself an equal in this relationship, and own your awesomeness.
Heal past relationships. We’ve all had difficult relationships that make us think that romantic love is one big bummer. We need these relationships to teach us about what we want, and how we behave in relationships. Do the work to heal any hurt, pain, or resentment you have towards past relationships. Energetically cut any cords you still have tied and free yourself from the past.
Learn to love your own company. You are enough in this moment. You don’t need to have someone else to make you feel worthy, learn to love your own company. So many times we feel like we need a partner just because we don’t want to be alone, and this is a clingy, unattractive energy that really won’t serve you in the long run. Be self-sufficient, independent, and love time spent with just you.
Don’t compare to other relationships. Comparing is seriously the worst, especially when it comes to romantic relationships. It’s a major obstacle if you are in a relationship, and it’s such a downer if you are single. Don’t compare yourself to someone else or someone else’s relationship, just don’t. You will be happier, your partner will be happier; it’s just a win win.
Know what you want. It’s really helpful to know what you want in a relationship. You don’t have to be too specific, but start to imagine what your ideal relationship would look like, what the details are, and the role you play in that relationship. Send a clear message to the Universe.
Surrender timing to the universe. With all this being said, surrender is key. You can’t control how everything will unfold, so just trust, that in due time, everything will work out for you romantically, as it should.

I hope these little tips help you in your relationships! Know that you are loved right now, just as you are! Let me know your thoughts on how relationships are for you.

xoxo,

Michelle

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My End of the Year Ritual

The end of a year is such an exciting time. For me, I can just feel the change in energy, the shift in perception, and the immense curiosity of what is to come. I find myself feeling extra positive at the end of each year, and feeling like anything is possible. And really, it is.

Even though the end of the year is such a hectic time with holidays, parties, and family time, I find it’s a time of going inward and reflection. I just love taking time with myself to go over the past twelve months, honor what has happened and prepare for another whole year.

You may all have your own rituals of how you close out a year, but I want to share with you what I do to say good-bye to the year that has passed and say hello to a brand new era of our lives. Check out my own end of the year ritual below!

Gratitude meditation. As a perfect way to start my ritual, I take some time for meditation. Spend a few minutes in silence with your eyes closed and just feel gratitude. You can think back to experiences or people that have filled you with joy this year and take these minutes to just be grateful. Feel this feeling in your whole body and soul. Epitomize being grateful for everything that has happened up until this moment.
Journal about all the challenges, experiences, and lessons learned. Although a great year in many ways, 2018 was also an extremely challenging year. This journaling portion for me will be so important, as there has been SO much I have learned and been through. Take an inventory of all that has happened, recognize it, honor it, and then set an intention to let it go. Think of the New Year as a clean slate; keep the past in the past and allow space for the excitement of a brand new year.
Set intentions. You all know by now, I love intention setting. Again, it makes me feel like anything is possible. You could again take some time in meditation, or just go inward and see what your spirit truly wants for this year. Maybe it’s focusing on self-care, or building a business, or finding a romantic relationship. Listen to what the soul wants, and send this intention out to the Universe to be manifested. Your thoughts, words, and actions are so powerful. When you truly want something, the world will conspire to help you achieve it.
Make an inspiring to-do list. I love having things to look forward to. Sometimes it’s fun to make a list of fun things you would love to do in the days to come. Maybe take a fun family vacation, go on a meditation retreat, or even read a book you have been longing to dive into. Make a small list of fun things you would like to do for yourself in the coming year. If you are feeling even more eager, you could even pull out a calendar and write it down there, truly encouraging you to follow through on making time for you and your joy! Remember you are in charge of your happiness, make yourself a priority and find time for yourself in 2019.
Let go. Perhaps the hardest step for many of us, me included! I love to micromanage and make sure everything gets done, so surrendering the outcome to the Universe can be super challenging. Once you have gone through all these preparatory steps, it’s time to just let go, and allow everything to happen in due time. Of course, it is still necessary to take positive actions in the direction of your dreams and intentions, but there is no need to force or put pressure on yourself for the outcome. I have found that everything happens for a reason and in the perfect timing. Trust that life will follow in this way.

I would love to hear your end of the year rituals, and what you do to prepare for this brand new year! Thank you for spending 2019 here with me on the blog, I’m so excited to see what next year has in store for us! Happy New Year!

Blessings and peace,

Michelle

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How to Manage Holiday Stress

It’s officially the most wonderful time of the year, right? The holiday season always makes me feel so happy, nostalgic, and joyful. That is, until I let the outside pressures of the holiday creep in, inducing stress and unease.

Holidays have become bigger than life; more expectations, more highs and lows, and more pressure to be perfect. When we let this happen, the real meaning of love, joy, and peace tend to go out the window. Luckily, I’m here to help!

I want to enjoy this magical time just as much as you, so I’ve put together some tips on keeping your holiday season (whatever that looks like for you) stress-free, happy, and calm. If you’re feeling the heat from holiday stress, check out these tips below.

Center yourself so your presence is a present of peace. If you want your holidays to be less stressed, you have to start with yourself. A great way to find calm and centeredness no matter what is going on is to spend a few minutes everyday in silence and meditation. Your energy of ease will spread to those around you. Be the change!
Get organized. There tends to be a lot going on at this time of year. Holiday parties, gift exchanges, family get togethers, it can be challenging to keep it all in order. Give yourself a break by taking some time to get organized with all you have going on.
Set your priorities straight! Stemming off of tip #2 above, there is a ton going on at this time. You DON’T have to do it all. There you go, I gave you permission to say no. We often feel pressured to go to every party and event and please everyone. This mentality will only add more stress! Get clear on what you truly want to do and what you want to be apart of, and release the rest.
Let go of perfection. Things don’t have to be perfect to be enjoyable. Some of the most fun, memorable holiday experiences I’ve had come from spur of the moment “mistakes” or unplanned events. Don’t run yourself ragged trying to create the perfect holiday situation. Make plans, set intentions, but release control of minor details.
Remember the reason of the season. Be loving! Love is why we are here, isn’t it? If you feel yourself getting caught up in the hustle and bustle, take a few seconds, come back to your breath, and get back in tune with that loving attitude. Try making someone else’s day by being extra kind and compassionate. Give back to those who may need some help this year, and treat everyone with so much love.

What are some of your go-to’s for staying sane this season? Let me know, and happy holidays!

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Five Ways to Boost Your Mood and Beat the Winter Blues

It’s December, and there may be snow and dreary weather. Perhaps seasonal depression has kicked in for you. Speaking from experience, I know just how trying a grueling winter can be. Most of the time, it’s easiest to just curl up and wishfully sleep through the rest of the season. Since we’re not bears, and we can’t hibernate, let’s come up with some ways we can reverse the winter blues, and create our own sunshine.

1. Meditate. This is always my number one “go to.” We know the drill: Meditation calms the mind, eases the spirit, and starts your day out on a strong foot. Pick a cozy spot in your meditation corner, and instantly boost your spirits. Even 5 minutes will help!

2. Be in the “Now.” It’s hard to not yearn for the months when the sun will come out again and the snow will melt, but as we have learned, present moment living is a sure fire way to be happy in life. Bring yourself back to the “now,” and find the positives in what is going on at this very second. I promise you, there is always a silver lining.

3. Get moving. Exercise makes you happy. We all know it, yet it’s always the last thing we really want to do after a long day. The endorphins matter! Do whatever you can to move your body for at least fifteen minutes each day. Staying stagnant day-after-day can really lead to some low times. Try something new, be adventurous. And if it’s really freezing out there, waltz on into a hot yoga studio and warm your body up from the inside out.

4. Make a Date. Organizing fun activities with loved ones can always turn a frown upside down. Be creative, be a kid again! Take the initiative and spread the love to all of your social circles.

5. Sneak in the Vitamin D. While sunshine can be limited, try your best to get out, and enjoy it when you can. Vitamin D can improve your mood, kicking seasonal depression to the curb! If you’re really craving extra sun, look into a sun lamp, or replace some of your light bulbs with ones that are similar to sunlight.

What have you found useful to get you through the winter months? Let us know!

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Increase Your Focus in 6 Simple Steps

Lately I’ve been feeling super unfocused. It’s not great, and I don’t like it, but I’ve been trying not to be too judgmental on myself because of it. A few weeks ago I wrote about social media detoxing, and being mindful of the time spent on the Internet. Given that, for my work, I spend lots of time on the computer, I tend to veer away from my “productive” time and more toward the entertaining, mindless aspects of the Internet. I’ve been letting my monkey mind go, and I have seen repercussions! I’ve noticed that my concentration isn’t what I know it can be, and my presence is certainly not at its highest.

We all have things that come into our lives and take us off our paths. We feel off-center or unbalanced, but it’s always okay because it’s in the awareness that we bring ourselves back. Focus is super important in peaceful, happy, living as it is the key component to your presence in life. One of my favorite teachers, Gabrielle Bernstein says, “Your presence is your power.” What does your presence say about you? If you’ve been finding yourself distracted or off focus lately, don’t fret! This week, I have some tips for you on bringing yourself back into the present and being that magnificent, powerful person you’re here to be!

Spend time with yourself (and just yourself). We seldom are alone, without other people, technology, and distractions. Make an effort to sit with yourself in stillness and in peace. This can be uncomfortable, and that’s okay. Practice training your mind to be still.
Get clear. If you have tasks that need to be accomplished, be clear with what you need to do. Sometimes it takes writing things down to make it more official. Set guidelines and goals for yourself, and then when a task is completed give yourself a break!
Practice being one-pointed. It’s really easy to have eight different things going on at once. A lot of us think that multi-tasking is the way to efficiency. Distracted work doesn’t produce the best results; so try being focused on one thing at a time. In a conversation, give that person 100% of your attention. While you eat, focus on your food. Even while watching a movie or television program, focus just on that. Get in the habit of just settling into whatever you’re doing in a given moment.
Declutter your space. My mind tends to feel a little chaotic when my living space is chaotic. Take a look around you and see if your environment is cluttered, it totally has an effect on the mind. If so, take some time to reorganize, clear out, and create space. You’ll see great results mentally and physically.
Journal to release unnecessary thoughts. Personally, I know journaling is great for the mind, but it can be so hard for me to keep up with my journaling practice. When I don’t journal, I can feel my mind fill up with crazy thoughts. When you take pen to paper to release the thoughts in the mind, it’s almost like you are physically letting them go, creating space for new, positive thoughts. If you’re feeling stuck or unfocused, pick up a pen and just free write, don’t judge or edit what comes out, just let the words flow.
Take some time to relax. Often if we’re losing focus, we have too much going on in our lives, and are frantic to keep track of it all. Being busy is great, but you must remember to take care of yourself. It’s okay to not get everything done in a given take. Cut yourself some slack.

How do you bring yourself back when feeling unfocused or even unmotivated? Do any of these tips feel helpful for you? Let me know in the comments below, and have a great week!

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5 Tips for Better Sleep

One of the best tools I’ve gained since being on a spiritual path is simple awareness. Like I’ve said in the past, I don’t try to be perfect, but I try to be mindful and aware of my life, my habits, and make conscious choices on how I can lead the healthiest, happiest possible life. I’ve learned to notice signs and symptoms from my body when I’m not taking the best care of myself.

Lately, I’ve been feeling exhausted and totally drained, everyday. I wake up not feeling rested, wanting to continuously hit the snooze button on my alarm clock. Sleep is so important to me. I literally can not function without good sleep. Since I’m practicing mindfulness and awareness, I started to ask myself, “What am I doing to inhibit my sleep?” I choose to take responsibility of my health and decided to incorporate some of these habits into my life to get my sleep, health, and vitality back on track.

If you are feeling the lag of not getting restful, meaningful sleep, try incorporating some of these tips into your day-to-day routine. Be mindful! See what works for you, and let me know how it goes for you! We all know how proper sleep leads to so many health benefits. Let’s make sleep a priority this week!

Meditate daily. There is a plethora of health benefits from meditation. It’s like a reset for the mind, body and spirit. A daily meditation practice, even for just a few minutes can help you feel more centered, rested and at peace.
Stay hydrated. Now that we are in the colder, drier months of winter, it’s extra important to make sure you’re drinking enough water. Many times I find myself up in the middle of the night feeling parched and not well if I haven’t had enough water the night before. I try to have a bottle of water with me at all times to drink up throughout the day!
Avoid eating or drinking any stimulating substances at night. Be mindful of what you consume a few hours before bed. For me, going to sleep on an extra full stomach and eating heavy foods disrupts my sleep. Also, if you’re sensitive to caffeine, avoid stimulants like coffee or even chocolate before bedtime so you’re not wide-awake when it’s time for sleep.
Disconnect! One hour before bedtime, try disconnecting from all technology. The lights from our phones, computers, and televisions have an effect on our sleeping patterns. Try this for a week, and see how it works for you.
Journal. If you’re wondering how you can spend those few minutes before you go into your restful slumber without technology, journaling is a great healthy tool to try. Many of us feel we have difficulty even falling asleep due to the restless mind and its incessant thoughts. Journaling is a great way to release those thoughts and go to sleep with a clear head. For a few minutes each night, put pen to paper and let the ink flow without editing your thoughts or words.

I hope you find these tips helpful so that you can have the dreamiest sleep, every night! Keep me posted in the comments below!

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Starting Your Day Stress Free

How we begin the day, much like how we begin anything, sets the tone and mindset for that day. In continuing down the path to mindfulness and awareness, it’s important to start each and every day on the brightest note possible. We all have so much going on in our lives, and can feel the pressure of daily responsibilities and stresses.

This week, we’ll talk about some tools you can incorporate into your life to start you morning stress-free and in peace. Check out this list below, contemplate these actions, and see if there are ways you can add any or all of them into your daily routine. Play around with it, make it your own, and learn to love waking up every morning in such a lovely, peaceful way.

Find a gentle alarm to wake you up. Although logic tells us that finding the most irritating and persistent is the sure-fire way to wake up, let’s try something new and find something that is effective, yet peaceful. If you use your cell phone as your alarm, go through all the options and find one that doesn’t send your body into a panic just by listening to it. Awaken every morning in peace starting with the first sound that you hear.
Take some deep breaths. When you first are waking up, try not to pop up and hop out of bed to get to your morning routine. Ease your way into this new day, by taking some nice, deep, comforting breaths. As we know the breath is so important in our lives, and can have such a calming effect on our bodies and our minds.
Avoid your cell phone and other forms of technology first thing. Many of us wake up and immediately go to check our phones or computers for emails, news, and social media alerts. I admittedly am one of these people, so I know how hard this can be. Give your mind a break first thing, and wait a little while to storm into the hustle and bustle of daily life. Start every morning with a small technology detox.
Set aside time for morning meditation. Following any practice or spiritual path will tell you the importance and benefit of meditation. Calming the mind, tapping into your intuition, and cultivating patience are all qualities we accumulate when we have a dedicated meditation practice. Whether it’s for one minute or an hour, be diligent every morning by taking time to sit, in stillness and peace, and focus on the breath, and forget everything else.
Say a prayer of gratitude. Every morning if nothing else, I feel at least some sort of gratitude and thankfulness for another day of life. As we know, having an attitude of gratitude is a wonderful way to inspire happiness and attract abundance. Silently, or aloud, state how grateful you are for life, regardless of what is going on for you on that day. There is always something to be thankful for.
Let your thoughts flow with journaling. Before your mind has a chance to go wild with thoughts and stresses, allow yourself some time for free-flowing writing. Don’t try and control it, just put a pen to paper and let whatever comes come. Journaling and reflecting can be such a great way to let go, calm the mind, and find clarity.
Set an intention for your day. Intention setting is another great tool for living your greatest life. By sending out into the universe how you want your day to be, you are automatically taking that first step to make it happen. Your intentions don’t have to be large or grandiose, find something meaningful for you, something that resonates with you, and keep it in mind throughout your day.

So, after reading this, I’m sure a lot of you are thinking who has time to do all of this? Part of being dedicated to leading the best life possible means being diligent, honoring your time, and making adjustments. Perhaps if you’re finding that you don’t have enough time in the morning, try waking up just a little earlier, going to sleep a little earlier, and trusting that what you are doing every morning is so beneficial for you and your life. It’s the small simple shifts and changes that we make that help us to create the lives we’ve been yearning for.

How do you begin your day? Do you feel frazzled in your morning routine, or do you feel refreshed and ready to take on the day? Let us know!

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How to Deal with Rejection

Rejection can be a real drag. We get our hopes and expectations up and sometimes, we just don’t get that job, relationship, opportunity, invite, etc. that we really want. Even though we can experience a vast array of sad emotions when things don’t really work out the way we want them to, it’s so important to remember that the Universe is always working in our favor. So, if it does in fact close a door that we were really hoping would stay open, chances are that something even more amazing will come right around the corner to take its place.

It’s really hard to get our ego minds to understand this, and I even struggle to remember this all the time. Lately though, whenever I hit an end of the road and things are just not working for me that Rolling Stones song, “You can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes you get what you need” comes into my mind. It’s like a little affirmation confirming that what I want might not be what I need. It’s also a prayer for support and trust.

In the ever spirit of reworking our brains from negative to positive, let’s learn how to look at rejection in a new light. Shall we?

1. Ask yourself important questions and get in touch with your emotions. Why did you want this thing (job, relationship, house, car, etc.)? Get to the bottom of your feelings about the situation, and start to truly understand why your ego mind is telling you that you need this thing that you don’t already have. Usually in doing this step, you will come to find that you don’t really need this thing, but your mind keeps telling you that you do.

2. Don’t beat yourself up. Life is filled with highs and lows, and if we are let down by a rejection or denial, it really has nothing to do with our own self-worth; it simply wasn’t meant for you. Don’t allow your mind to get on the negative self-talk spiral taking you into a further state of sadness.

3. Try to see the situation from all perspectives. Even though it may be tough, try to see how it could be a good thing for you to be rejected or denied what you were searching for. Maybe you didn’t get this one job, because you really are interested in exploring something different. Perhaps you broke up with your significant other because you need to spend some time really loving yourself. Get your mind moving in a different, more “big picture” way of thought so you can really feel that this situation is not the end of your world.

4. Let go of control. Usually when we don’t get what we want, we try to muscle our way to get that thing. We scheme, plot, plan, and try and force something to happen that’s simply not meant to be. Realize that there is so much outside of your control, just focus on your own thoughts, beliefs, and feelings, and let go of the rest.

5. Trust that what is meant for you will find you. Just like stated above with a job or relationship, if you are feeling rejected or denied, feel it deep within yourself that something even better then you could even imagine will take it’s place.

6. Act as if. If you really are searching for something in your life, act as if you already have it. When we send out that desperation signal, are really saying that we don’t trust or have faith. You are enough and whole just as you are, so act that way!

7. Find a trusted support system to help lift your spirits. While so much that we talk about is about the inner work, it’s also great to have some outside help. Refer to your go-to spiritual running buddies to help keep your mind positive.

8. Be grounded and confident in yourself. Taking off of the idea of Number 6 above, know that even though you may feel down because of this idea of lack or rejection, you still are complete. Be confident in yourself, keep your head up high, and revel in the limitless possibilities of your life.

What are some of your best ways to deal with rejection? How do you take your mind from negative to positive? Let me know!

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