Annika Sharma's Blog, page 4

5 Books that Shaped My Life.

As an author, it's difficult to choose a small number of books that have left a lasting mark. After all, we read voraciously and every book leaves a bit of another world within us. But some books stick with you despite the months, years and decades that have passed since you closed the covers with a contented sigh, and a feeling that you'd never quite be the same again. I wanted to share my list with you and I hope you'll get the chance to be introduced to some new books if you haven't already read them, and if you have, I hope maybe you'll go back and read them again for old time's sake.1. Born Confused, by Tanuja Desai HidierBelieve it or not, I was 16 years old when I saw the first book with a South Asian protagonist. Give that a brief thought. I went 16 years of my life without a literary character who looked like me, talked like me and narrated a life remotely like mine. Insanity. It was so earth-shattering to read a book about a South Asian that I carried the book with me in my backpack for most of tenth grade. And I wasn't the only one! So many have given tributes to the author, Tanuja Desai Hidier, for bringing Dimpla Lala's story to life--one of a not-so-certain desi-ness, who falls for an Indian boy among the skyline of New York City and challenges a lot of the assumptions she grew up with. In a fun plot twist to my own life, Dimple's love of photography is what made me feel less weird about being creative...and the book made me want to move to New York someday, fall in love and chase dreams. Now, I'm doing just that--and became a published author in NYC who, in fact, has had conversations with Tanuja over Twitter and Instagram. If that's not a lifechanging book and a story to go along with it, I don't know what is.2. The Twentieth Wife, by Indu SundaresanWhen I look back at high school, I have to laugh at how much I zoned out during history class...and how I am the exact opposite now. This book may have had something to do with that awakening and appreciation for history. The Taj Series, of which The Twentieth Wife is one of three books, follows the family of Shah Jahan, the emperor who built the Taj Mahal, through three generations and their love stories. Set against New Delhi and the Deccan (both where I am from), it is an incredible look into the Mughal Dynasty and the rule they had over India. The entire series is beautifully written and gave such a human touch to historical figures who are sometimes controversial in India's history.3. Girl Code, by Cara Alwill LeybaThis is less self-help book and more women's empowerment. As the book points out, it's amazing what happens when women genuinely show up for each other and the book not only is an uplifting one to read, it's a realistic, blunt and funny reminder that we are capable, brilliant and 100% worthy even in our imperfection. For me, this book is a great way to remind myself about entrepreneurship and drive, and why I started chasing my passion of being an author in the first place. It's really easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and freak out over the things out of our control but at the end of the night, it's really critical to remember why we are chasing certain pursuits to begin with...This book also comes with a workbook and I really enjoyed going through it and writing down goals, ambitions and how far I've come along on this journey. I'd recommend it to anyone who wants a nice kick in the rump and also wants a fun read.4. Chasers of the Light, by Tyler Knott GregsonI got into poetry a few years ago. I think it was from Pinterest--a particular writer's work kept popping up and everything of his that I read spoke to my soul, like it was able to lift the words right out and put them on paper. Tyler Knott Gregson has since remained one of my favorite poets. His words are beautiful, rich with imagery and most of all, capture the realities of heartbreak, love, and the world in prose. I love his writing. He is the one that inspired my own poetry and while I will never even feel close to this man's skill, his kindness, empathy and work on his Instagram and through his books is a gamechanger and will continue to inspire me.5. Harry Potter Series, by JK RowlingThis is no surprise. I've told this story a thousand times--but three weeks after I received my first book deal, I went to the Warner Brothers' Harry Potter Studios in Watford Junction, outside London. The three airplane hangars there are where they filmed the movies and have now been turned into a museum of sorts. You can walk through the Great Hall, etc. At the very beginning of the tour, one of the introduction videos says something like, "It was all because of a book." Those words, especially after I'd just landed my own deal, touched me in ways I still can't describe properly. The series itself is amazing, an incredible work that grows as the reader does with the characters making realistic progressions through their ages. It's not always predictable. The lessons are for anyone ages five to ninety-five. It's an incredible work of art and between the books, movies, amusement parks, studios, spin-offs...I truly don't think that we will ever see anything like the phenomenon that is Harry Potter (outside of Star Wars, perhaps).

100 Good Things.

Over the summer, I was dragged down by work, writing, and school all at once. I couldn't see through the haze because there were so many things that required my attention and I was in Power On mode 24/7. Even my sleep was full of nightmares about missing deadlines (don't you hate that?). To counter some of the stress, I started making a list (because I'm me) of little victories, of small loves, and tiny things that happened throughout the day that made me happy. It was a little ridiculous, but I was grasping at straws just to get through each minute, let alone a stretch. The news has been grim lately. Everyone's been down with sickness, and the frigid weather (East Coast, I feel your pain), and the winter blues. My fingers turned purple last week while I was walking home with groceries! I thought I'd share my list. I hope it brightens your day a little bit--I know sometimes even reading it makes my heart feel a smidge lighter.When all the dishes are done.The way it feels to be on a boat on the water on a summer day.Seeing an amusement park from far away, full of lights, delighted screams and the smell of funnel cake.Taking out your contacts after a long day.Belly-busting laughter at outrageous stories.The way a burrito tastes when you're starving. Or pizza. Or french fries.Meeting new friends.The way it feels to wear a bathing suit and not be conscious of your body.The scent of peppermint eucalyptus.The way your skin feels after a sauna.How a pool feels after you're hot.The way uncontrollable laughter aches in your belly.The first bite of cookie cake.Finding a love note written by someone you don't know in a drawer at a restaurant.That perfect photo moment you actually capture.Ocean breeze. Salty air. That smell of fish that is unacceptable anywhere but a beach.Cold water on a hot day.A beautiful view.Chocolate.The moment you feel emotional weight lifted off your shoulders.When people share a secret with you.When an old friend tells you a story about themselves that you never knew.The way your skin feels after exfoliated and shaved. Especially when you run your legs along satin bedsheets.A flowy dress that makes you feel pretty.When you're photogenic and Instagrammable AF.When you get a genuine compliment.How it feels to see an email that changes your life.A good meal when you're really hungry.The way cobblestone paths make you feel like you've transported in time.Knowing you've overcome a battle from your past.The sound of water.When your favorite song randomly shuffles on.Sunshine on your face.A time limitless nap.Kudos from a supervisor at work about a job well done.Feeling like you're making a difference in the world.Iced tea on a summer day.A fully charged phone or computer.Marking a new place on a map as 'done'.About halfway through yoga class when you're in the groove and no longer wonder why you showed up.Your muscles after a good stretch.Finishing everything on a to do list.Cute animal videos on YouTube.The first time you light a new candle.Finally falling asleep after a long day.The sound of rain and thunder.Finishing a great book.A small achievement like reading a few books in a week.The way an improvement feels when you've been working at getting better.Finding an old, happy photograph of family or friends.The phone call you’ve been hoping for.A really good kiss.When you take your makeup off at the end of the day and look in the mirror.Christmas lights.A fire on a chilly night.Hot chocolate on a brisk evening.Catching a Harry Potter marathon on television.Dancing your heart out.When you make a perfect meal.When new clothes are delivered in the mail.The smell of cookies baking.When you go grocery shopping and you realize your pantries and fridge are full of all the good things.When you feel capable of anything.A really good grade on an exam, assignment, or class.Making an impact on someone who has less and deserves more.The feeling of accomplishment when you fix something that’s broken.Seeing a historical sight and knowing how many people, famous or not, have walked the same path.The way a good cry empties your tank.A freaking good playlist.The way your nails look after a good manicure--self-done or at a salon.When someone sends you flowers and you're completely surprised.The way an "I love you," fills you when it comes from your person.When you catch yourself smiling because of something that happened years ago.Warm clothes right out of the dryer.The best little indulgences--reading a magazine, using a face mask, watching a TV show.The first day you are back in the game after being sick for a few days.When you catch your favorite TV show on television by chance.When your underwear and bra match and you feel like you're the most put together adult ever.When it's snowing and you are warm under a blanket, in front of a fire, with no need to go outside.A splash of your favorite perfume or shampoo on your hair.Reading something that resonates with you so well, you actually think someone read your soul and put it into words.A good hair day.Not needing a coat when you go outside.A call for an interview at a job you really want.A day where you get to do whatever you want.Seeing two old people hold hands and hobble down the street, even in their old age.When someone quotes a movie and you go back and forth and recite at each other.A premiere of a show you love and have been waiting for.Watching a meteor shower.The first glimpse of fireflies on a summer night.A last second basket, touchdown, goal, or run to win the big game.A surprise sweet love note or note of gratitude.The excitement before you board a plane to a new place.Snuggling with a pet. Or a loved one. Or both. Fuzzy socks.The innocence of a child and all the questions they ask without reservation.Forgiving someone after being unable to for a long time.Seeing an ex and feeling nothing but the best for them--and knowing you're doing great now.Seeing a picture of yourself from a tough time and loving how far you've come since then...and the fact that you survived.A fully stocked bookshelf. Or a fully stocked bar.

"The Glorified Babysitter..." Or not. The Truth about Early Education.

**Special thanks to Amanda and Rachel, a former co-worker and my former director at a center, for allowing me to post pictures from when I taught their beautiful girls.**A few years ago, I got into it with someone--mistakenly, I assumed we were kidding around as I laughingly made up stupid insults, whereas he was seriously lobbing verbal grenades my way. One cutting remark he made sticks with me. "You teach preschool kids because you can't handle being a real teacher."Re-reading those words now still makes me want to throw a chair at his head...and I'm someone who feels bad killing spiders! As a now-former preschool teacher, I, nor the millions of other early childhood teachers out there, chose that profession because we couldn't handle anything else. Let's be clear: very few can handle it. Sixteen children in a classroom bawling all at once because a fire alarm terrified them out of nap? Corralling fifteen children under the age of 18 months to participate in activities designed weeks in advance? Potty training, teaching the alphabet, singing nursery rhymes (oh...the nursery rhymes...) and building basic life skills? Many grown adults can't handle it with one child let alone more than ten at once.At first glance, early childhood centers often look like magically colorful places where children play all day, and a glorified babysitter changes children, feeds children and naps a child according to a parents' wishes. It's like a kid spa. The truth is far less simple, and often overlooked because parents and the general public simply aren't there during working hours to see what happens behind the scenes. Comments like the one hurled at me all those years ago are woefully mistaken and ignorant reminders that early education (and, in all honesty, all educators of all levels) are under-appreciated, undervalued and not understood by the outside world...which is part of the problem with the education system.So let's have a quick glimpse into the background of early childhood centers, shall we?Lesson plans, by high-quality centers, are often designed with state standards in mind--and various accreditation requirements in place. Experts in education have developed specific goals for age groups split by months, for cognition, sensory activities, art and music, mathematical and logical skills, science talents, and verbal expression. These experts have windows for typically developing children where certain goals should be met, and targets they should meet before early intervention services are recommended.As a teacher, not only do these standards mean designing your classroom to be the most optimal learning environment (no reading area next to a music area, for example, but both are required), it means setting up lesson plans for age-appropriate developmental goals. What does THAT mean? Basic life skills--everything from picking up a fork and spoon appropriately to being able to sightread letters. It means being able to handle textures so that when a child turns thirty, they aren't avoiding major food groups because they can't handle the way it feels. It means raising a future adult who can hold their spoon the right way and not look like the Beast in Beauty in the Beast circa dinnertime. The critical learning years are between 0-5. The brain grows exponentially and children do more learning during that time frame than any other phase in their lives. In order to capitalize on those precious years, early education teachers bust their bottoms to cram in as much learning as possible from eye tracking in infants to math skills in pre-k. We (the general public) often forget that children are essentially blank slates when they are born, armed with genetics and environmental factors that need to be nurtured. Even the most simple of tasks for an adult (tummy time, anyone?) needs practice and dedication for a child to develop properly. That art project your child brings home with a handprint? It's probably also serving as a textural experience with cold, sticky, wet substances. That funny little shaker in a water bottle? Sounds, visual stimulation, and textural. The description from your toddler about the "slime" he made? Not only textural but a great lesson in mixing substances together to see what kind of gunk forms. What often seem like silly, fun, creative activities are also serving as lesson plans drawn out from manuals of what needs focus in a child's development at the right age.Those report cards that come home from a preschool may be seen as a humorous rite of passage--after all, can a one year-old really earn a full grade?--but they're critical insights into what a child is missing in their development and what areas to focus on. They are also tough on time--each teacher pays individual attention to the needs of every child in their classroom to fill out evaluations about their learning, often with no planning time and during times of play from observations jotted down. These markers are such good signs for whether a child needs early intervention services--studies have shown that the earlier you target a problem, the better the results will be. By catching a child's patterns in speech, cognition, learning, spatial reasoning, and movement, early educators are often the first people to notice if something isn't typical...not because parents don't notice--but because in a classroom of 16, it is often to catch the little duckling that might not be learning to their potential. And the best results ever come from parents and teachers working together to make sure all these goals are met.In addition to the lesson plans come requirements from outside the centers. Preschools meet state and local standards for learning, as well as Department of Public Welfare (DHS, DPW, the title varies by state) standards to be sure equipment is safe, products are cleaned, germs are at bay, and food is served properly. The number of requirements, documentation, protocols and policies are staggering and these teachers follow them gracefully though at times, they conflict even with each other.It's impossible to address education without addressing governmental policy. In today's age, it's a tragic truth that education funding is being cut further and further from early ed to high school. High school teachers are already underpaid--early education teachers often make minimum wage or, at max, a few dollars more, through no fault of private centers or public schools but through the funding these schools receive. The money to decorate classrooms or fund art or science occasionally comes from teacher's pockets. And not a single teacher I know has ever complained about it because they deem it worthy.And what is the impact of high quality early education? Let me tell you. The Perry Preschool Study followed a group of adults through the age of 40. The study found that adults at age 40 who underwent a high quality preschool program had higher earnings, committed fewer crimes; were more likely to hold a job, and were more likely to have graduated from high school than adults who did not have a quality preschool education. THAT is what early educators do--provide a high quality learning environment with long term benefits.One of the kindest things I've ever heard a mom say (thanks, JH!) was, "You're as much a mother to my children as I am because you spend all their waking time during the week with them." It was a compliment that not only bonded me with her two beautiful girls more, but reminded me exactly the level of influence these teachers play on children's lives under their care. Because outside of lesson plans, protocols about safety, and meeting a thousand requirements, teachers are also the kissers of boo-boos, the singers of lullabies, the soothing hand when a child has a fever from teething, the provider of Cheez-Its, and the dance party throwers for eight hours a day--a large majority of a child's week.Early childhood educators are not glorified babysitters. "Early education" is not a magical term to disguise being the changer of diapers. It's a challenge, one that only the able rise up to, and manage with grace. While I've left the field, my utmost respect goes out to my peers who teach early age groups or ANY age groups because of the magical influence they hold over children for their lives, the investments they make in their classroom so a child can succeed and the incredible work they do despite a lack of resources. It was my privilege to work with them then and they hold my admiration now.So what are some things to remember?An early childhood educator is not a babysitter. They are, however, a fantastic informational resource (think about how many kids they've seen!), a friend to talk about a child's development with (and to get reassurance for all that mom/dad competition!), and a team member to make your child the best they can be.Parents and teachers make amazing teams--TOGETHER. During my six years, there were quite a few children who had delayed speech or motor skills that weren't quite as developed as we'd hope for. When we discussed with their initially scared parents, and we went through it as a team with early intervention services, working on those goals together, the children made remarkable strides. A teacher spends 8 hours a day with a full-time child. They make observations constantly. Combined with a parent's observations, you can nab a problem before it ever gets out of hand. And those children who needed services? Almost every single one of them ended up right on par by the following year.Early educators love those children. When you think about school tragedies in the last twenty years, teachers have often been victims while protecting their students. I have spoken to teachers during emergency trainings and information and we have all unanimously said to each other, "We'd do anything to protect them." Teachers may not be mothers and fathers to the children they teach but they love them similarly.A "thank you," goes a long way. Every teacher has had a parent or two who strolls in, picks up their child without a word, and leaves. Sometimes, teachers and parents are at odds about a child's development. But at the end of the day, however, early educators still love these children, take care of them and nurture their learning for a relatively small paycheck, and not a whole lot of appreciation in the government. A thank you, a gift card, a word of appreciation...they go a long way in reminding early educators of their value.Open the line of communication! Lesson plans, educational trajectories, what a parent thinks is best versus what the teacher thinks is best...communicate! At the end of the day, everyone has the same goal: raise a child who has reached their potential. The best way to do that is to do it together.

Highs and Lows of 2017.

I hope all of you had a wondrous Christmas (if you celebrate!) and if you didn't, I hope your days off were filled with good food, lots of love and plenty of laughs! As the year pulls to a close, I think everyone reflects on the highs and lows of the year. 2017 was a doozy. Outside of the national dumpster fire we all witnessed (anyone else feel like they need a glass of wine...or a bottle, to read the news?), on a personal note for me, it was a year of so many peaks and troughs.Highs:Travel: The year started in an ashram! I was in the middle of Amma's ashram in Kerala and it was a really peaceful place. I went to Florida with my friends in March. I moved to New York. I visited Montreal on a bachelorette party. I flew to Edinburgh for a long weekend. It was a beautiful year for seeing more of the world and expanding horizons.A Big Move: In high school, I was so certain I'd live in New York City. But as time went on, the fear of the unknown and the "bigness" of the city became daunting. I grew terrified of it. Of course, the only way to tackle a fear is to face it so I applied for an internship, got it, and moved to NYC anyway. I'm so glad I did. There's so much beauty here.Book deal: I can't possibly reminisce on 2017 without thinking about this. After a manuscript that got put on hold, and a deal that fell through, it was a huge relief to land a three-book deal with Sourcebooks. It's been a learning experience about working on contract, on deadline and writing on proposal and working with a company that lines things up way ahead of time. I'm really excited.Family support and loved ones' support: When you make a big change in your life like moving to a city that never sleeps and taking on school, writing and a full-time internship all at once, you begin to realize how much you need the support of the people in your life. I have been so lucky this year that even in moments of despair and depression, or moments of overwhelmed panic, I've been able to pick up the phone and text or call someone in panic. This blog: I had lost interest in maintaining my author website but my interest in life and paying attention has been renewed since relaunching this site, working on Instagram and connecting with people. It's been a fun ride taking photographs and getting creative again (outside of writing!) and really soothing to the soul to feel the fire again.Lows:Well, now I feel like a total ingrate after writing such incredible highs, huh? But I'll be honest...the lows were all tinged by one thing that wove its way through every inch of life.This year, my depression was a journey in and of itself. The hardest part of the year was being unable to get into a routine and constantly feeling like I was running at a high octane, disorganized level--that doesn't bode well for me and I felt fried. It took a toll on my work--which consequently felt disorganized--and on my self-esteem, because when I felt so on edge all the time, I thought my efforts in everything were sub-par and things began falling through cracks. I didn't feel "on" and life felt as though I was always missing a piece. Add in getting invested in the wrong people and feeling a few heartbreaks with both friends and boys, the depression only got worse, as if I couldn't control ANYTHING or keep ANYTHING in line.In the middle of it, there was the move to a city that teaches you about standing up for yourself, forces you to look at yourself in the mirror and reevaluate your successes and failures, and where everyone moves to achieve their dreams. In many ways, stripping down that way is a blessing. In the long run, it'll be better for me. But combined with feeling inadequate, I feel like a naked joke in the middle of the room (sorry for the visual, y'all!). It's deeply personal for me to admit that I've struggled with depression at all, not because of the stigma associated or because of what people will think, but because admitting weakness is tough. Ambiguous weakness is equally as tough. When you seem to have everything going for you and you aren't happy, you feel ungrateful and your voice is muted because you have no right to feel unhappy with life. To say, "I am unhappy and I feel exhausted but life is really good," sounds so arbitrary. After all, there are so many men, women and children who have faced "true" adversity in genocide, health problems, deaths, war, and violence...who am I to have the right to complain about a beautiful life and say it doesn't feel good enough? But I suppose one ray of light through the darkness is being able to keep that perspective--to know you are lucky despite it all and consequently, to find a way that brings peace to your heart because you know it could be worse. And, likewise, it's important to explore all the options you need in order to feel satisfied with life because life isn't a contest of who has it worse, and at the end of the day, everyone deserves to go to sleep feeling contented with their achievements. I'm still on that journey. I hope 2018 brings a climb to a peak rather than ebbs and flows and I am confident that I'll continue to find my way...After all, when I look at that list of highs again, my heart can't help but feel thankful.

Neeps and tatties, rumbledethumps, and castles...Hello, Scotland!

Hi everyone! I promise, I haven't forgotten about this blog or posting. In a sweep of exams, holidays, final exams, and--as the subject of the blog--travel, I had to adjust some priorities and put my favorite ones on the backburner.I was in Edinburgh, Scotland, for a long weekend and I just returned yesterday. Scotland, oh Scotland, you have staggered me with your greenery in the dead of winter, your mountainous terrain, the cliffs that reminded me only God himself could have created such beautiful landscapes, and a history so rich with a future so friendly. I flew to Edinburgh on a red-eye from New York City to see S on Thursday night. Note to self: red eye flights don't do it for me and I can't sleep well. But it turned out to be a blessing in disguise! Why? The Geminid meteor shower was in full force--and I cannot describe the beauty of looking out a plane window (perpetual window seat requestor right here!) and seeing a sky full of stars, some of which would fall at random intervals. It was pretty breathtaking.S and I checked into our hotel, The Haymarket Hub Hotel, once we took the train and then began our adventure. He's in Edinburgh often for work since he lives in London--and the benefit of having someone familiar with an area is indescribable (especially when you're sleepy!). The hotel's beds aren't super comfortable but the location is perfection. We never had to walk far to reach sights and the train station is just across the street.I love history. That's a pretty well known fact. It comes as no surprise, then, that I found the architecture of Edinburgh and the way the history has been preserved really staggering. The city is built atop itself, so alleys (like the one above--doesn't it look like something out of Harry Potter?) are common to climb from one level to the next. Businesses are burrowed right in, and you can often find gems tucked away in corners. S kept telling me stories of graverobbers and barrels concealing bodies that were rolled down these pathways, which adds a ghostly factor to wandering about at night, and a fun story during the day when it won't scare you!The Royal Mile (behind the buildings in the distance) is a slightly longer-than-a-mile stretch of cobblestone road that extends between Edinburgh Castle on the cliffs (the very first picture in this post) to Holyrood Palace, the Queen's official residence in Scotland. It's full of buildings built in the 1500s and still maintains the architecture and some of the businesses from over 500 years ago. Pubs, souvenir shops and boutiques line the street and it's impossible not to fall for the charm every brick exudes. Off Princes Street (the street I was taking the photo from) is the Christmas Market, a carnival of rides, food booths and Christmas crafts. The colors of the market were so fun to contrast with the earthy tones of the city. Not to mention...Christmas cider warms you up and the smells of desserts are enough to make one swoon. Let's just say S and I were a little happy with all the food and drinks available.At the end of Royal Mile stands Arthur's Seat, cliffs that overlook the city and water. I made it exactly halfway before throwing a temper tantrum (yes. I am a toddler.) but it is worth it to go up even that much, just for the views. The greenery still blows my mind...it's the middle of December, people, how is it so stinking pretty?! Everyone recognizes the red phone booths that England has made famous--and here too, they are common sites for photographs by tourists. I took this picture before an amazing dinner at Ecco Vino. Just up the street was the Giles Cathedral, a 900 year old church with an incredible steeple shaped like a crown. If you get the chance, you should look it up--photos required a fee so I didn't take too many and I don't want to post what S teases me as "stolen photographs".Outside of being a history buff, another thing I am known for (along with my best friend Melissa) is being a monster Harry Potter fan. Did you know Edinburgh is where JK Rowling wrote the first book? So many of the small winding streets and the groundkeepers' cottage at Holyrood Palace are reminiscent of Diagon Alley and Hagrid's hut. The city oozes with magic (no pun intended) and HP imagery is everywhere. As a writer, it suddenly made sense where some of the strongest worldbuilding came from. The trip served as inspiration for how an author picks up their surroundings and can create a world or story out of those settings by injecting their own creativity in, and how each and every author owns their story and makes surroundings their own.Overall...this trip was incredible. Despite a couple of bumps in the road like being sleepy the entire weekend (and henceforth emotional), I fell in love on this trip. The story was beautiful and every second was one I wouldn't take back for anything.

5 Essentials for Surviving Your Day (What's in my Bag?)

"A woman's heart is an ocean of secrets." Thank you, Rose from Titanic, you're 100% correct--and like a woman's heart, her bag is key to how she rules the world during a hectic day. Here are some ideas for those crazed days where you're sprinting around and your bag holds your entire life...1. The Pinch Provisions Mini-mergency KitThis is a gamechanger. In a tiny kit the size of your palm fits 17--count them, 17!--essentials from a mending kit, to a teeny hair spray, to earring backs...It is astounding and so necessary to have these things when you're in a bind and this kit has saved my butt on numerous occasions from when my tights ripped (hello, clear nail polish!) to fixing a wardrobe malfunction (double-sided tape, anyone?)2. A Power Bank (mine is a Dulla!)Does anyone else find themselves on the run and unable to pause to find a power outlet? All. The. Time. In that case, carrying a phone charger just isn't going to fly. In comes the power bank to save your butt! While weights and charges vary, my charger has FIVE FULL CHARGES for my phone. It's a little heavy, but it's served on weekend trips and long car rides beautifully. Worth every cent!3. First Aid Beauty CreamI cannot recommend this cream any more highly. All my life, I've struggled with eczema and skin that bursts out in rashes--the use of this cream eliminated any use for cortisone to tame the irritation. I always carry a little tube in my bag to banish dry elbows, add a little moisture to my face or pamper myself with some unscented goodness.4. BareMinerals GEN NUDE Matte Liquid Lipcolor in ScandalThe best part about this lipcolor isn't the chocolatey flavor--it's the range of nude colors available. This is one of my essentials to turn to when I have no makeup on and suddenly have to run somewhere or meet someone--the dramatic nude of Scandal adds some color to my face and makes me feel put together.5. A fragrance rollerballI cannot count the number of times I've either sweat more than expected or met friends right after we've all come from the gym--a huge protector against being the smelly girl on the train is having a fragrance rollerball of your choice at your behest! It's a lifechanger when you can splash on a scent you love and go about your day like you didn't just take an hourlong spin class.

Halloween Your Classroom...or office...or anywhere!

This post is for all of you who have a cubicle, classroom, foyer or space that you LOVE to decorate for Halloween! As many of you know, in my former life, I was a preschool teacher. I was also a three-time champion of Best Classroom (clearly, the best award I've ever earned) in schoolwide competitions between classrooms. Here are some fun tips to decorate your space and make it scream with fun!1. Choose a theme that relates to the people coming by. Do you work with people who grew up in the 90's? Salute Your Shorts, Doug, Rugrats, Saved By The Bell...all of those ring a bell? Do you work with preschoolers? What are the kids obsessed with? Mine were all about Mickey Mouse Clubhouse so when my assistant teacher suggested it, we got on board. Choose a theme for them, not you.2. Focus on the WOW factor, not the tiny details. Remember, parents walking by a classroom or supervisors judging, or simply trick or treaters won't have the chance to check out the small hand-painted figurines you painstakingly placed in a corner, of the scene from that show you like. You need a BAM factor that captures their attention...and then some fun medium-sized accents. It takes a little time--but not a whole lot of crazy effort. When we did Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, we used tableclothes ($1 a piece at the dollar store!) and draped them from the ceiling. 3. Have fun and become a part of the theme! When we did an Enchanted Forest theme, we went as fairies. Harry Potter--we wore house hoodies (the most comfortable day, ever!). Mickey Mouse Club--Mickey Mouse tees and ears. One of my favorite outfits was recycling my old prom dress when I went as Glinda the Good Witch!4. Make others a part of it. For our Enchanted Forest theme, we created handprint castles.For Harry Potter, the handprints created owls--which was then turned into an Owlery. If you have a cubicle, use pictures of your officemates as part of the theme--or create a scene in your foyer, take an instant photo of the trick or treaters in front of it, and hand the photo to their parents so they have a record of the fun theme! Holidays make our memories stronger--and every Halloween that rolls around brings these back to the forefront! I hope they create some inspiration for next year and y'all collect a whole lot of candy tonight! Happy Halloween!

Me Too. Her Too. Them Too.

I was 9. My grandfather used to sit on the steps in the front of the house sometimes in his retirement and joke with passerby and the inevitable visitors who would stop to say a quick hello but end up staying for dinner. He and my father had gone out so I had decided to imitate him in his spot, waiting for them to arrive.It was the middle of summer and the small cement ramp that allowed us to bring my uncle's motorcycle up the steps into the courtyard of our property was cool in the evening sun, and served as a fantastic slide for my little body.As I sat, a man rolled up on his scooter. It was beige--one of those Vespa types--and since we're in mid-1990s India, probably a Bajaj. He lifted a small bottle to his lips. Then through a hole in his pants, he brought out what I (in my mature age) now refer to as a 'dangle' and began playing with himself.I remember staring at him with a frown on my face, unphased and challenging him. He fumbled for a bit, likely drunk, then drove the bike to the neighbors house and shouting at them to come out for a bit.I went inside and told my mom. I wasn't allowed to play outside alone anymore.I was 9. And now, twenty years later, as Harvey Weinstein makes the news and Donald Trump escaped relatively unscathed after Pussygate, one has to wonder at all the coverage about women being victimized: What the hell took so long?I'm going to preface this post by saying I am not an expert. That preface doesn't dismiss my opinion as invaluable--it recognizes that there are personal shortcomings, and a depth of learning I still have to reach. No one is an expert with hot button problems like this.As the #metoo campaign washes over social media, a jab of discomfort pokes me every time a woman posts. It's an oddball reaction. Fury. Solidarity. Support. Sadness. Vulnerability. And back to fury. All in a matter of a second or two. Every status with those two words prompts a sensory ambush. One thing, however, is glaringly obvious. Whether it's the press objectifying women as sexy or making a big deal for showing a little sideboob, or the play-by-play deconstruction of a woman's sexual history on the stand when testifying against an alleged rapist, the approach to women's word has always been one of doubt, shame, and an assumption that their stories are not, in fact, based in truth but in their looks, in drama, in golddigging or in any other capacity that undermines their intelligence and veracity. Society has never been forgiving of a woman who speaks out.Before we dive in, there are so many things to remember. My story is the one I choose to tell--but not the ones I remember most. Many women who speak of being verbally harassed likely have worse experiences hidden underneath their clothes and inside their minds. But bringing them out still prompts shame, an emotion that rationally, shouldn't make sense but silences us anyway. That means when a woman has put those two words on a status, there are a few things we need to keep at the forefront of our interactions about it:Sensitivity. A woman who writes #metoo does not owe you her story. There are many who did not post who may have had lifechanging experiences they are not in the position to share. That is their right. And their rights matter.Shock. Did you feel the unpleasant lurch in your stomach when you read how women you may have grown up with--mothers, sisters, friends, cousins, neighbors, your teachers--had unwanted sexual advances forced upon them? Were you surprised? I sure as hell was. According to Facebook, 45% of users in the U.S. had friends who posted it. Of course, we read stories of catcalling and stories of workplace harassment. As a woman, I've experienced it. It's a day-to-day thing that shouldn't be accepted and is dismissed. It is something that no woman should have gone through but that all have. Hell, our president himself dismisses conversations about women as "locker room talk." How many times have we heard "Boys will be boys," as an excuse? But even those count. Whether it's something deemed as harmless as "boys will be boys," or whether it's a violent assault, why is it that women still have to deal with it, internalize it, and feel the undeserving shame of being talked about? Tell me it doesn't shock you that this is acceptable.Awareness. Men are sexually violated. Children are as well. Saying "me too," is not a pissing contest, a dismissal of the very real experiences men and children face, or a social media trend. For many women who posted, it is a heartfelt admission of something traumatic that happened to them. Think about how many memories we forget because they weren't important enough. This was crucial enough in their lifetime that they remember it. And it implies that it shouldn't occur to anyone.Complexity. This entire campaign goes far beyond a mass grouping of women who have been sexually victimized. It is not as simple as a rallying cry. There are different degrees of assault, different effects, different people and different situations. Get it? Every situation is different. A "me too," for a catcall may not equal a "me too," for a rape on the scale of horrifying experiences--but should victimization fall in a scale at all? Who are we to declare whether someone's traumatic experience is traumatic enough to fall under an umbrella...there are nuances to each and every experience and a blanket "me too," will not cover all of them. And harassment and assault need to be recognized as separate issues--though both are markedly unacceptable--so one campaign may not differentiate enough. Likewise, is it okay that either type of abuse exists? Some have argued the campaign may encourage vilifying all men--and that isn't fair either because a good man is NOT a unicorn. They exist in heaps. While I could go on for hours about the various arguments for and against the campaign, I will say this: it is not easy, clean or black and white. It is gray, complex, and knotted.I have seen so many posts arise about Title IX, sexual assault, sexual violence, prevention education, counseling, and resources pop up on my feed as well--and of all the emotions that this campaign has elicited, feeling heartened by this is my favorite one. It's crucial women know of the resources available to them. It's not as simple as stopping the activity from happening. It's about remembering who has gone through it and helping them too. Interventions need to occur across the spectrum. Sexual harassment is a disease and should be treated as such in society, from prevention to treatment.I've read quite a few opinions about how a #metoo campaign does nothing to change the facts and that these admissions need to roll into action. I don't disagree. The campaign serves as a wake-up call, a scream to be heard and to be recognized as the people in your every day life who have faced something awful. But what can we do with this knowledge that so many women in our lives have been sexualized without consent? Here are some ideas.Donate. Organizations like Hollaback! are aimed toward allowing people to walk down the street without the threat of catcalling or harassment. RAINN is the largest anti-sexual violence organization in the country and supports victims of rape, abuse, and incest. Support your local rape crisis center.Be mindful. It doesn't mean someone is a delicate human who can't handle it, or that you're a monster. Be mindful of what you're saying and who you're saying it to. Spare the heartache.Raise your children to recognize what is acceptable and what isn't. "Boys will be boys," creates a mindset that this behavior is acceptable. It minimizes the victimization of the target. It promotes the idea that a victim shouldn't feel the way s/he does and that they're making a big deal of nothing. And this breeds shame. Encourage your daughters to trust their voice and enforce that they are heard.Contact Congress to ensure that policies are made related to sexual discrimination, harassment or assault and that they will not be tolerated if they do not protect victims.Speak out and advocate.Make sure your office has a way to report sexual harassment.Request or provide a training on harassment.Invite a training to your church, social groups, or book clubs. If you know of a survivor or witness something that makes you or someone else comfortable, call it out if it's safe to do so.Remind and encourage anyone who has been a victim of sexual harassment or assault that they are being heard--don't talk. Just listen. They have a voice and if they have chosen to confide, they get the floor. They have every right to feel any emotion.At the end of the day, the #metoo campaign has opened the blinds and allowed sunshine on places that have quietly collected dust for years. Hopefully, it has made some people recognize the dirt they never noticed before--and provide solidarity for those who needed it. But our work isn't done. This battle isn't won. And it's time to take a stand.

5 Ways to Build Your Day

Hi! Oh. My. Goodness. Friends, I am in desperate need of a massage and a cell-phone free day in a tropical place! On days where your brain is seeping out of your ears, I find a few different things help me survive. The best part? None of them involving you revamping your entire routine tomorrow. They're all things you can ease into.1) Invest in a manual, old fashioned alarm clock. I know. It's revolutionary. BUT hear me out! It let me put my phone on my desk at night, away from me. And y'all, this little purchase has changed the game. While I am no longer waking up to high tech alarm sounds, I pop out of bed, get my day started with my morning routine and coffee, before I ever make it to my phone. Allowing that half hour to myself lets me ease into the day, gather my thoughts about what needs to be done, and put my game-face on before I ever hit the flurry of text messages or emails that have collected overnight.2) Wake up early. Oh, you night owls and lovers of sleeping in are probably rolling your eyes already! One of the secrets of women power players in various industries is waking up early, according to Forbes. As someone who does this (from being a former late riser), I can attest to the amazing vibe you get when the world is sleeping and you're up. It's powerful. Not a morning person? Set your clock back 15 minutes each day so it's not too much of a shock to your body, and take a few weeks to get used to waking up earlier. Leave something you love doing so you can look forward to finishing it when you wake up!3) A bedtime ritual and a wake-up ritual. The first thing I do when I wake up is put my contacts in, make my bed, brush my teeth, wash my face and look at my planner. Every woman is different. But there's peace in a morning routine that helps me feel organized and methodical. Bedtimes are a great time to de-stress too--meditate, wash your face, light a candle, deep breathe, do yoga in bed, read, do something creative with your hands and/or plan the next day. Go to bed unencumbered because you've unloaded it all in some form. My routine involves journaling if my mind is overwhelmed, reading a little bit, and reviewing my Simplified Planner for the next day so I know what's coming.4) A brain dump in the middle of the day. Have you ever had those days where your mind is full to the brim and you can't take a break? Write it down. Sit for a minute, and do a brain dump of things you need to do, things stressing you out, tasks that need to be finished at some point but not immediately...You can organize later. But getting it out is so important for your mental clarity!5) Creativity soothes the soul. Do you have a creative pursuit you love doing? Photography, painting, sewing, cooking...whatever lights your soul on fire and DOESN'T earn you a paycheck. Writing is my passion--I think everyone knows that! But it's still a job at the end of the day that I'm being paid to do. I actually paint on my own and love taking photographs. Working with my hands lets me get the creative juices flowing WITHOUT worrying about the end result, the deadline, and the bottom line. Go find something you love that is just for you! It'll make your day so much better, even if it's just sketching on a post-it!I know these sound like small changes...but as a woman juggling a multitude of ambitions (like all you other hustlers out there!), these are the ones I find tried and true. Give them a shot and let me know if you've notice a change! Got something better? Let me know that too! Shine bright, friends.

5 Things Anyone Can Do to Celebrate Diwali

HAPPY DIWALI, everyone! I hope this coming year brings you everything you could want. Now...what is Diwali? In India, it's the Festival of Lights--diyas or butter lamps light every nook and cranny of the home, gifts are handed out to anyone and everyone, and the food...Mmm, the food! If India didn't have a huge pollution problem and hadn't banned pyrotechnics, there would be fireworks equaling the Fourth of July celebrations in the United States :) Diwali is associated with the inner triumphs of good over evil--Indian mythology speaks of tales of victories in battle between gods and demons. But you don't have to be Hindu or even South Asian to enjoy the amazing aspects of Diwali. Here are some ways to partake in the festivities and expose yourself to a new culture rather than fearing something so new that you don't try!1) Light a lamp. Lighting a firecracker or an oil or butter lamp is what everyone in India does to celebrate finding the light of goodness within oneself and in others. In my family, we often put up the Christmas lights early and allow them to hang until Christmastime has passed. Even a candle will do (as I discovered this morning when I found out we didn't have some of the Diwali things I needed!). Besides...lighting a candle and taking it easy for the night? Sounds like a relaxing night to me!2) Wear a little color. India is full of bursts of color and Diwali is no different! The best outfits, full of rhinestones, silk and sequins, are always hanging from shopkeepers' windows in preparation for the holiday. Wear a bright color to signify the start of the new year and attract brilliant things to your life!3) EAT! The sweets at Diwali are unlike sweets at any other time of year. Boxes and boxes are given out to neighbors, friends, family and co-workers. Go out to a restaurant and order dessert to top off the meal. It'll be a wonderful escape from real life and sweeten up your night as you head into a new year...can't argue with a sweet start!4) Meditate. I have often read that meditating on a light, or a candle, can help you focus on the positives but also still your heart and calm your mind. Sometimes when I'm stressed, I do the same thing--stare at a flame or light a candle, and just breathe in a pattern. It calms me, and grounds me. Meditation doesn't always have to be a religious practice--practicing mindfulness is an incredible way to live, let alone to start the beginning of a phase of life. If you're looking for an "Om" mantra, find them on spotify and find a pitch that speaks to your soul. According to Hindu mythology, "Om" is the sound of all creation, a low hum that symbolizes the vibrations of life. It's also super soothing to hear.5) Spend time with friends and family. How do you stay on high moral ground and remain happy? By spending time with the lights of your life, obviously! Friends and family are so crucial to Diwali celebration. Much like Christmas, it's a time to bond with loved ones and be reminded of the grounding influence each of you have on each other.Can you think of any others? Send them my way! And in the mean time, Happy Diwali, dear reader. May your new year be prosperous and full of joy.