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The Well of Lost Plots Quotes
The Well of Lost Plots
by
Jasper Fforde19,651 ratings, 4.07 average rating, 1,060 reviews
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The Well of Lost Plots Quotes
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“After all, reading is arguably a far more creative and imaginative process than writing; when the reader creates emotion in their head, or the colors of the sky during the setting sun, or the smell of a warm summer's breeze on their face, they should reserve as much praise for themselves as they do for the writer - perhaps more.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“Books may look like nothing more than words on a page, but they are actually an infinitely complex imaginotransference technology that translates odd, inky squiggles into pictures inside your head.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“Good. Item seven. The had had and that that problem. Lady Cavendish, weren’t you working on this?’
Lady Cavendish stood up and gathered her thoughts. ‘Indeed. The uses of had had and that that have to be strictly controlled; they can interrupt the imaginotransference quite dramatically, causing readers to go back over the sentence in confusion, something we try to avoid.’
‘Go on.’
‘It’s mostly an unlicensed-usage problem. At the last count David Copperfield alone had had had had sixty three times, all but ten unapproved. Pilgrim’s Progress may also be a problem due to its had had/that that ratio.’
‘So what’s the problem in Progress?’
‘That that had that that ten times but had had had had only thrice. Increased had had usage had had to be overlooked, but not if the number exceeds that that that usage.’
‘Hmm,’ said the Bellman, ‘I thought had had had had TGC’s approval for use in Dickens? What’s the problem?’
‘Take the first had had and that that in the book by way of example,’ said Lady Cavendish. ‘You would have thought that that first had had had had good occasion to be seen as had, had you not? Had had had approval but had had had not; equally it is true to say that that that that had had approval but that that other that that had not.’
‘So the problem with that other that that was that…?’
‘That that other-other that that had had approval.’
‘Okay’ said the Bellman, whose head was in danger of falling apart like a chocolate orange, ‘let me get this straight: David Copperfield, unlike Pilgrim’s Progress, had had had, had had had had. Had had had had TGC’s approval?’
There was a very long pause. ‘Right,’ said the Bellman with a sigh, ‘that’s it for the moment. I’ll be giving out assignments in ten minutes. Session’s over – and let’s be careful out there.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
Lady Cavendish stood up and gathered her thoughts. ‘Indeed. The uses of had had and that that have to be strictly controlled; they can interrupt the imaginotransference quite dramatically, causing readers to go back over the sentence in confusion, something we try to avoid.’
‘Go on.’
‘It’s mostly an unlicensed-usage problem. At the last count David Copperfield alone had had had had sixty three times, all but ten unapproved. Pilgrim’s Progress may also be a problem due to its had had/that that ratio.’
‘So what’s the problem in Progress?’
‘That that had that that ten times but had had had had only thrice. Increased had had usage had had to be overlooked, but not if the number exceeds that that that usage.’
‘Hmm,’ said the Bellman, ‘I thought had had had had TGC’s approval for use in Dickens? What’s the problem?’
‘Take the first had had and that that in the book by way of example,’ said Lady Cavendish. ‘You would have thought that that first had had had had good occasion to be seen as had, had you not? Had had had approval but had had had not; equally it is true to say that that that that had had approval but that that other that that had not.’
‘So the problem with that other that that was that…?’
‘That that other-other that that had had approval.’
‘Okay’ said the Bellman, whose head was in danger of falling apart like a chocolate orange, ‘let me get this straight: David Copperfield, unlike Pilgrim’s Progress, had had had, had had had had. Had had had had TGC’s approval?’
There was a very long pause. ‘Right,’ said the Bellman with a sigh, ‘that’s it for the moment. I’ll be giving out assignments in ten minutes. Session’s over – and let’s be careful out there.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“Fiction wouldn't be much fun without its fair share of scoundrels, and they have to live somewhere.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“I got Oedipus off the incest charge--technicality, of course--he didn't know it was his mother at the time. ”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“Who do readers expect to see when they pick up this book? Who has won the Most Troubled Romantic Lead at the BookWorld Awards seventy-seven times in a row? Me. All me.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“Failure concentrates the mind wonderfully. If you don't make mistakes, you're not trying hard enough.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“Anything devised by man has bureaucracy, corrpution and error hardwired at inception.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“«Silenzio in aula!» strillò il Coniglio Bianco con voce stridula.
«Mozzatele il capo!» strillò la Regina.
Il Re inforcò gli occhiali e si guardò intorno inquieto, per scoprire chi aveva parlato. La Regina gli diede di gomito e fece un cenno nella mia direzione.
«Tu, laggiù!» disse il Re. «Dovrai parlare molto presto, miss, miss...»
«Next» interloquì Coniglio Bianco dopo aver consultato la sua pergamena.
«Come?» replicò il Re un po' confuso. «Abbiamo già finito?»
«No, Vostra Maestà» rispose paziente il Coniglio Bianco «il suo nome è Next. Thursday Next».
«E magari pensi di essere spiritosa?»”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
«Mozzatele il capo!» strillò la Regina.
Il Re inforcò gli occhiali e si guardò intorno inquieto, per scoprire chi aveva parlato. La Regina gli diede di gomito e fece un cenno nella mia direzione.
«Tu, laggiù!» disse il Re. «Dovrai parlare molto presto, miss, miss...»
«Next» interloquì Coniglio Bianco dopo aver consultato la sua pergamena.
«Come?» replicò il Re un po' confuso. «Abbiamo già finito?»
«No, Vostra Maestà» rispose paziente il Coniglio Bianco «il suo nome è Next. Thursday Next».
«E magari pensi di essere spiritosa?»”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
“Prices of semicolons, plot devices, prologues and inciting incidents continued to fall yesterday, lopping twenty points off the TomJones Index.”
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
― Jasper Fforde, The Well of Lost Plots
