Jan’s Reviews > Genesis > Status Update

Jan
Jan is starting
After yesterdays book I'm still pissy, so I'm changing genres. Big Time. Yes, I'm totally in the mood for Hulksmash romance. Bring it on.
Dec 13, 2011 09:17AM
Genesis (Enslaved, #1)

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message 1: by [deleted user] (new)

Hulksmash romance! Love it! Can I steal it for a shelf title? What was yesterday's book?


message 2: by Jan (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jan A category romance. Treat Her Right (Men To The Rescue #4). I wrote an angry review for it :)

Love the idea for a shelf name :) Is it for romances with giant hero's paired with fragile women? Barbarian hero's? Green hero's? Or the combo?


message 3: by [deleted user] (new)

Green hero? As in the possessive, jealous type of green? Or a more literal interpretation?

I'm thinking giant, hulking, dominant, alpha heroes with fragile, doll-like women who have tiny little waists and giant boobies and inner cores of steel but who still need protection and nurturing. I just threw up a little into my mouth. Which is, I think, all of PNR..?


message 4: by Jan (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jan Yeah, I really think for true Hulksmash romance you need a touch of Barbarian as well. You know, Conan styled awesomesauce. And rages, we definitely want rages.

In theory a true Hulksmash romance can happen with every heroine, no matter what bodytype, since the size of the hero automatically makes her small.


message 5: by [deleted user] (new)

Jan wrote: "In theory a true Hulksmash romance can happen with every heroine, no matter what bodytype, since the size of the hero automatically makes her small."


hehehehehehe

so true, so true.

And also true about the rages. All that 'killing edge finely honed to a killing edge with a killing edge in his eyes' stuff.


message 6: by Jan (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jan Crushed phones! Lightpoles shaped in Hulkprofile because he was blinded by his rage and didn't see it! Torn clothes!!


message 7: by [deleted user] (new)

Imprint of a giant penis on the pavement! Lesser men beaten up for asking the heroine if she had the time! The heroine wet and trembling for Hulk hero's touch because he asked her for the time! The heroine with her own watch because she's too 'smart' and 'powerful' to ask anyone for the time!


message 8: by Jan (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jan Hulkhero tall enough to correct time on churchclocks when daylight savings kick in! So everybody has the correct time!


message 9: by [deleted user] (new)

Hulkhero able to alter rotation of the earth so daylight savings never an issue! Hulkhero not sure if heroine is fragile virgin or fragile non-virgin so Hulkhero goes for middle ground and gives her ten million orgasms so her passage is well lubricated for Hulkhero's ten-foot penis! Unknown to Hulkhero, heroine has Super Vagina able to absorb infinite penis quantities!


message 10: by Jan (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jan Coincidentally that just pretty much happened in the book I'm reading. Without the virginity stuff though. Just plain fear he might break her :p


message 11: by [deleted user] (new)

It makes me feel all kinds of inadequate that normal human beings just use the humble magic of over-the-counter lube to deal with vaginal accommodation issues. Where is our ten million orgasms before penetration, goddamit? What the goddamn hell does a woman have to do to get that kind of attention?


message 12: by Jan (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jan In this case, be kidnapped by spiderlike aliens and put in a breeding pen with hulkhero to breed docile but strong slaves. There's also an alien baby that they force on her, and when she starts caring for him they take him away as leverage for her to sex it up with the unwilling Hulkhero.

It's so deliciously B-movie :)


message 13: by [deleted user] (new)

Hmm that is indeed a tradeoff to think about: orgasms for Africa versus your freedom from spiderlike aliens and their sexual alien ways.

I think what may tip the balance either way is: are there loincloths involved?


message 14: by Jan (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jan Loincloths are involved! Otherwise she'd probably have been frozen in fear at the sight of his cock :p

Just to be clear. Hulkhero is not the same kind of alien as the spiderslavers. He's a slave too, and as much forced into it as her. But they like each other. And as the heroine thinks, if your only options are things you don't want to do, if one of them turns out to be pleasurable you should enjoy it.


message 15: by Jan (new) - rated it 3 stars

Jan Ha! Just now there was a literal Hulksmash between two Hulkheroes :) Jealousy, it is teh awesome when it comes to kind Barbarians :D


message 16: by [deleted user] (new)

TWO hulkheroes? That cannot be. There can be only one.

Doesn't Dark Matter theory postulate that the size of the loincloth is inversely proportional to the size of the penis? So a ten-foot penis in theory has a loincloth about the size of a small glob of spit hanging over it?


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