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Rachel
read and liked
Abby's
review of Breaking Dawn (Twilight Series, Book 4):
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
First let’s start off with Bella’s personality. Though her aversion to the wedding ceremony is over-done and her self-deprecating attitude by this point is impossibly trite, it seems like the classic Bella. By the time she finishes her honeymoon with Edward, she has gone from being this average teenager who is in love enough to marry her boyfriend but doesn’t want to jump into a marriage for fear of being thought of as “small-town”, to a married, pregnant eighteen year old who is so intent upon keeping her incubus child that she is willing to die so that the thing can live. Oh, and she has also become somewhat reminiscent of a crazed sex-addict. She is annoyed that Edward wants to go out and explore the island with her, snorkeling and hiking and doing fun activities. She would rather just stay in the house and have sex all day, every day, for weeks at a time. That’s disgusting. Also defying any sort of logic is the fact that once she realizes she might be pregnant, it is confirmed by the fact that her stomach has a little bulge and she feels the baby kick. The five-day-old embryo. Right. It’s almost like Stephenie Meyer wanted to stuff five years of normal life into Edward and Bella’s magical existence for the sake of not having to write a fifth book. Although Bella’s pregnancy was a surprise to the vampire world, the event seemed utterly contrived. By the time I finished reading the honeymoon scene, I was having to shut the book to collect myself. I felt my mind had been violated, like Stephenie Meyer had just mind-raped me through nearly 100 pages. I had to force myself to continue reading. It only got worse.
I was annoyed that Stephenie decided to use a whole third of the book for Jacob’s perspective. What sort of structure is that? It’s just a lame excuse to develop the plot from an easier angle. It’s a total cop-out. Why even write a version of Twilight from Edward’s perspective if you can just throw in alternate perspectives wherever it makes things easier? Once Bella becomes pregnant, she ceases to be Bella. We see most of the pregnancy through Jacob’s eyes, and Bella’s stubbornness is annoying. I didn’t even feel compassion or sympathy for her. Edward speaks of it as a “thing”, Carlisle is afraid of it, they say it’s an incubus and not even a real infant, that it eats its way out of its mother’s womb, and yet Bella wants it, is willing to die for it. What? Since when did Bella want to be a mom? Since when did she not care about the whole “small town” image? She doesn’t seem to see how this child could complicate her life, much less end it. Plus, the thing grows at an alarming rate. Within a week or two, Bella’s stomach is large enough that she “cradles it” in her arms. This image disgusted me. First of all, I would rather not imagine a pregnant 18 year old, married or not. Second of all, the logistics of it bother me. Like oh, of course she gets through 9 months of pregnancy in roughly four weeks. Way to go Stephenie, it’s obvious you’re not anxious to speed the plot along or anything. Plus, with Bella’s personality it seems like she would have a hard time wrapping her head around the idea of impending motherhood, let alone be absolutely ready for it in four weeks’ time.
Then the birth – grotesque, disgusting. Edward biting open Bella’s womb to free the child. Um, sick? I can only hope the movie version of this saga ends with Twilight. I can't imagine them trying to dilute the honeymoon scene, let alone the birthing scene. I can just picture the awkward energy radiating in the theatre during a movie like this. I wouldn't be surprised if there were nothing but crickets at the end, moviegoers awkwardly shuffling out of the theatre, avoiding eye contact with those they came with. But moving on, how about the lovely celebrity-coupleish name they burden her with? Renesmee. Gag me. I wonder what Stephenie Meyer was even thinking. And to further her perverted, illogical tirade, Stephenie has Jacob imprint on the infant Renesmee. Wow, didn’t see that one coming. Of course, how perfect for Bella. She can have Jacob in her life AND have him be happy. Wow. Applause. Great solution. Not. I would rather he imprinted on Leah. That would have made much more sense.
Once Bella becomes a vampire, she continues to remain the exception to every rule while being utterly oblivious to the fact. Bella! You’re so under control! Really? I am? What? Bella! You are unusually graceful! Really? Was that jump good? Bella! Your mind can block everything out, you have super powers! And oh, you can conveniently use them to protect the ones you love! Really? Is that good? Am I being modest enough? Gag me. How convenient to the plot that Bella can skip over all the newborn vampire nonsense and just be herself. How convenient that her passions for Edward only intensify. Who needs human experiences? How convenient that Charlie gets to know the Cullens are not human. How convenient that he happily accepts that two months after giving his daughter away, he already has a grandchild the size of a 3 year old. Right. Because infant Renesmee is not nearly as interesting or cute as talking toddler Renesmee who appears to be a baby Einstein that prefers to “show” her thoughts rather than speak them. And suddenly Bella has the mental maturity of a 30 year old mother though she’s still an 18 year old who got pregnant four months ago and has a daughter who is progressing at least 5 times as fast as a normal infant. The whole plot line reminded me of a child who got bored playing the same old story with her Barbies and suddenly decided that Barbie and Ken were going to have a baby, and that baby was born and became a functioning member of the family within two hours of play time.
I was a little hopeful when the Volturi arrived for what seemed to be an inevitable war. I recalled back to when Bella mentioned something about not being able to imagine the Cullens without their head, Carlisle. I thought for sure Carlisle would make some ultimate sacrifice to save Edward and Bella. At least one major casualty would have breathed some feeling into this book other than “everything is perfect because Bella and Edward defy every bit of logic.” But no. In true predictable fashion, Alice returns and saves the day. Bella grows some balls and radiates her “shield” over everyone. Pathetic Bella, the damsel in distress, the one who always had to be protected and saved, now the one protecting and saving everyone else. How convenient. No fighting occurs, Renesmee is assured a life of immortality and will conveniently grow up extra fast for Jacob. Bella and Edward live to have more sex. Everyone lives happily ever after.
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Rachel said:
"In the words of Randy Jackson "That was just OK for me". Nothing incredible. Angels and Demons was much better and much more page-turning. If I could have given it 2 1/2 stars I would have.
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