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August 11
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Katie
is currently reading:
Y: The Last Man Vol. 1: Unmanned (Paperback)
by Brian K. Vaughan, Pia Guerra
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Katie
gave
   
to:
Only Begotten Daughter (Harvest Book)
by James Morrow
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recommended for: Idiots like me who have to finish what they start.
read in August, 2008
Katie said:
"Christ, this was a terrible book. No pun intended.
My roommate read this for a religion class and suggested it to me. It would have been better if she slipped a puff-adder into my shoe and saved me two weeks of hell.
The dialogue might just b...more
Christ, this was a terrible book. No pun intended.
My roommate read this for a religion class and suggested it to me. It would have been better if she slipped a puff-adder into my shoe and saved me two weeks of hell.
The dialogue might just be the worst of any book I’ve read. Nobody talks like this. This is the author’s guess of what snarky, clever people might sound like if he I fact knew any snarky, clever people. The characters are stereotypes, from the Yiddish-spouting, neurotic Jew to the uber-bitch lesbian, but the cliche cake goes to Satan. Writing the devil is one of the best parts of biblical fiction, but Morrow doesn’t even try. “Wyvern” takes the form of a slick business man. Then he’s a horned, forked-tailed red monster. He enjoys rolling piglets into footballs and dropping parasites on tomatoes. He, the timeless anti-Christ, quivers with rage when told he's full of shit. This isn’t the prince of darkness. This is my five year old nephew.
Worst still is Julie Katz. Fickle, spineless, obnoxious daughter of God. First she refuses to help people. Then she decides to live it large in hell because she can’t be bothered to take responsibility. Jesus calls her on it, and she wails and says she’ll make things better. She goes topside, and promptly runs and hides. Again.
I was hopeful when she had to give up her divinity to return to Earth, and even more so when she was crucified. Morrow at last seemed willing to take a risk. No more easy exits for Julie. This time she had to take the pain. The comparisons between the Passion and her death were almost moving.
And then Morrow pulls the plug. Julie is saved. Why?
Because God is a sponge.
Amanda the pet sponge turns out to be the sponge she’s fed poison from. It converts the poison to a harmless toxin a la Romeo and Juliet to induce death-like symptoms. Then Julie wakes up, claws out of her body bag under the ocean with holes drilled into her arms and legs, swims to shore, alive and well, goes home to best friend, husband and new baby, because God is a sponge.
What the hell.
The only interesting concepts I took from this book was the theory that God is outside the outside—existing but nonbeing. That and Jesus serving morphine in Hell. The rest should never have made it past an editor. ...less
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August 10
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Katie
is currently reading:
The Hours: A Novel (Hardcover)
by Michael Cunningham
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August 03
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Katie
gave
   
to:
As I Lay Dying: The Corrected Text (Modern Library)
by William Faulkner
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read in October, 2006
Katie said:
"I made it on the bevel...
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August 02
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Katie
added:
The Authority Vol. 2: Under New Management (Paperback)
by Warren Ellis
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Katie
added:
The Authority Vol. 1: Relentless (Paperback)
by Warren Ellis, Bryan Hitch, Paul Neary
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Katie
read and liked
Jilly's
review of Breaking Dawn (Twilight Series, Book 4):
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here.
"[pardon any grammatical/spelling errors, I'm not reading this over again--I didn't get much sleep obviously]
If I could give this book a lower score, I absolutely would. When you create a book series, there tends to be an issue with the next book ...more
[pardon any grammatical/spelling errors, I'm not reading this over again--I didn't get much sleep obviously]
If I could give this book a lower score, I absolutely would. When you create a book series, there tends to be an issue with the next book that comes out in the series having to be better than the last. Of course that is always a possibility for stories such as Harry Potter, where the plot is laced through all of the books and leads to an ultimate climax and resolution in the final book. Stephenie Meyer did not follow this example in any way, shape, or form.
Instead of possibly creating an internal plot that would follow the entire series, every book has...well, I cannot justify a plot in any of the books, save the first one (that was in the last 100 pages of the book), so I'll try to skim sweetly over this. For her last attempt, strike 4 on my count, Meyer rides this train till there are no more tracks; taking the train, and all of it's passengers on a bumpy, uncomfortable, and unforgivable journey no one had prepared for.
Bella's half-breed child shouldn't even exist, given Meyer's specific "VAMPIRES CANNOT HAVE CHILDREN", so of course she gives a pathetic, if not confusing, explanation to how Edward gets Bella pregnant. The child's name itself is atrocious; I honestly hope no one loves this series enough to name their own child that, out of their "love for Stephenie Meyer."
Let's remember what I said before: there is not a sustaining plot throughout these books, besides the fact that Bella wants to become a vampire; but even that is stretching it. So when Bella becomes pregnant, it's almost as if Meyer suddenly thought, "PLOT!" and took off at the speed of light in a direction that flabbergasted me. Has she even mentioned children in this entire book series? Besides the fact that little mutant Nessie takes the entire stage, Bella's giving birth to a mutant that should not exist (X-Men anyone?) seems to be the only thing that drives this story forward. Because otherwise, the story would have ended. Bella got married, Bella somehow someway got pregnant, Bella had a half-breed baby, Bella becomes a vampire, Jacob creepily imprints on said baby, and everyone lives freakishly happily ever after.
I shouldn't have to describe how horrific it is that the entire 800-pages of the final novel is about a baby. Bella seemed to move to Forks and somehow grow up in a year, getting married and having a baby, and living for forever with her ridiculously good-looking husband. I understand that Bella made the choice for herself, doesn't mean I have to think it was a good one. Or a good example for young girls to follow. I'm not going to step up on the soap box and preach about how many horrible morals this gives to girl's of today's generation (after feminism has fought to get us this far) because if they haven't read a cheap romance novel yet, they certainly will. Guys looking to date girls of that generation should beware however. If you don't sparkle in the sun, devote every step you take and every move you make to her, and like to watch her sleep, you might not have much of a chance.
But, back to the story, cough, I mean lack thereof. The Volturi coming in deemed itself, once again, random and overreaching for Meyer. As if she just wanted them to show up and have an epic battle, but it wasn't really epic and it didn't serve much of a point. However, if I was a 1000-year-old vampire, I'm sure I'd be bored enough to care about someone as trivial as Bella Swan too.
1/3 of the novel is in Jacob's perspective, and to be honest, that was the one part I enjoyed (somewhat). Only because I think Jacob was Meyer's best character. He shall forever be known as the character with a personality. However, as Meyer had introduced me to Jacob, and gave me reason to like him, she also had the power to do the opposite. Thank you, Stephenie Meyer for ruining one of the only realistic characters you created. *two thumbs way down* Not only did Jacob CREEP me out, he was so completely overbearing and whiny, I couldn't wait to get back to Bella, the whining queen! His imprinting on little Nessie just put the icing on the shit-cake I had been eating for the past 400 pages. I had assumed we went passed the pedophilia part with Quil, and come on, he imprinted on EDWARD AND BELLA'S BABY? Why couldn't he have imprinted on a 35-year-old alcoholic with an abusive husband and Meyer could give someone who needs saving a fighting chance by someone with super powers.
By this point, I was going to take an example from New Moon and jump off a cliff just to save myself from the rest of the book.
But I didn't, and I should have.
The rest of the book was almost as boring and laughable as the first half, but at least the first half had (gasp) fade-to-black sensual scenes.
As many people have been saying, this book is exactly like 1,000 stories on FanFiction.net--and if I can give you any advice, find a story on there and it might be a lot better than reading this.
And it would probably be 700 pages less....less
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August 01
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Katie
marked as to-read:
The Tales of Beedle the Bard (Hardcover)
by J.K. Rowling
bookshelves:
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July 13
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Katie
gave
   
to:
American Short Story Masterpieces (Mass Market Paperback)
by Tom Jenks
bookshelves:
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read in February, 2008
Katie said:
"I've kept this in my bag for almost a year now, picking through it whenever I'm not reading something else.
So far:
"Sonny's Blues" by James Baldwin = 6/10
"Weekend" by Anne Beattie = 7/10
"The Bystander" by Gin...more
I've kept this in my bag for almost a year now, picking through it whenever I'm not reading something else.
So far:
"Sonny's Blues" by James Baldwin = 6/10
"Weekend" by Anne Beattie = 7/10
"The Bystander" by Gina Berriault = 1/10
"The Amish Farmer" by Vance Bourjaily = 6/10
"1/3, 1/3, 1/3" by Richard Brautigan = 1/10
"Verona: A Young Woman Speaks" by 3/10
"Fever" by Raymond Carver = 4/10
"The Fisherman from Chihuahua" by Evan S. Connell = 6/10
"The Fat Girl" by Andre Dubus = 9/10
"Rock Springs" by Richard Ford = 7/10
"The Lover of Horses" by Tess Gallagher = 6/10
"Redemption" by John Gardner = 7/10
"Dream Children" by Gail Godwin = 8/10
"The Ledge" by Lawrence Sargent Hall = 6/10
"Water Liars" by Barry Hannah = 2/10
"Letters from the Samantha" by Mark Helprin = 6/10
"Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been?" by Joyce Carol Oates = 10/10...less
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July 06
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Katie
gave
   
to:
Sophie's World: A Novel about the History of Philosophy (Paperback)
by Jostein Gaarder
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read in July, 2008
Katie said:
""...we too are stardust..."
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