"Oh, I didn't buy it! I get my books from the library."
|
|
|
Okay, so it's time to stop referring to my seven-year-old daughter's genitals as her "girl bits." Honestly, this might take a bit of an anatomy review for me--I'm pretty sure there's something called a vulva down there with everything else, but as to...moreOkay, so it's time to stop referring to my seven-year-old daughter's genitals as her "girl bits." Honestly, this might take a bit of an anatomy review for me--I'm pretty sure there's something called a vulva down there with everything else, but as to its location...
I am completely on board with much of what McFadden claims should be part of parenting a daughter into healthy adulthood, emotional health and sexual health included. I'm going to start speaking with anatomical accuracy, I have always tried to make sure my daughters understand that they are the sole owners of their bodies (and thusly nobody gets to touch them without their permission--handy strategy, that), my husband and I are appropriately affectionate in front of them, I now have a go-to strategy just in case the girls ever walk in on me having sex (Hint: don't freak out), they pretty much know what a tampon is, although I could definitely be more chatty about it (mental note), and if I pause for a few seconds when they ask me an awkward question before I give my answer, well, that's just me thinking. I do the same thing when they ask me about math.
I would have liked for McFadden to make a bigger claim about who has the responsibility to do all this comfy talking, however. Her big claim is that we, as parents, must talk openly about all these adult issues in order to raise confident women. Well, it's a parenting book, so I get that. However, even though I consider myself the pinnacle of emotional health (I'm only snorting back a little laughter, there, which is SUCH progress), my mother was...not. Honestly, she probably did me a favor by keeping most of what I'm guessing is a lot of darkness to herself. I raised myself up mostly figuring sex stuff out through the unsupervised reading of medical encyclopedias. What little my mother did share with me was...can I say batshit crazy? Frankly, I'm still putting off a lot of that thought-work that I'm imagining makes people emotionally healthy for a later date, when I can afford the time and money to say to a good therapist, "My mother!!! What was UP with that?!?".
So yeah, all you emotionally healthy parents, of which I am TOTALLY included, will go on and raise our confident women with McFadden's advice. But don't you look around your society and kind of get the idea that maybe we ought to be working on raising confident women even if they're not our own kids? That maybe some of these other young women that I see out and about, from the random teenagers who, like me, might have looked relatively together but inside are seriously confused to the other teenagers who anyone can see are having trouble making good choices, might benefit from more societal options to help them learn about emotional and sexual health, and what to call their genitals, and that other people don't just get to touch them just because they want to? I would probably have benefited from something like that when I was a kid.(less)
|
|
|
|
Talking to you like you're an idiot isn't the same thing as giving you information at a basic level. While this Complete Idiot's Guide definitely talks to readers as if they're idiots--didja know that if you're selling your items on the Internet you ...moreTalking to you like you're an idiot isn't the same thing as giving you information at a basic level. While this Complete Idiot's Guide definitely talks to readers as if they're idiots--didja know that if you're selling your items on the Internet you need to photograph them?!? And if you're selling them at a show you'll need to pack them and then unpack them?!?--the information here is often vague, unhelpful, or just plain unlikely. Cases in point:
*While I guess that surely some people sell their crafts at at-home Tupperware-like sales parties, that has got to be rare enough to make spending half a chapter on it overkill.
*I just finished struggling to figure out how to process point-of-purchase credit cards, myself, but this Complete Idiot's Guide's discussion of how to do it contained pretty much all the information that I already knew before I even started trying to figure out how to actually set it up--in other words, it had none of the stuff that I just finished struggling to figure out for myself, the stuff that, you know, actually ALLOWED me to get POP credit card processing set up.
*Maybe this is just personal opinion, but advising crafters to use their word processing program's font effects to turn their business name into a logo...really? REALLY???
Although I've yet to come across the perfect craft business how-to book, I'd heartily recommend Craft, Inc. instead of this one. Craft, Inc. has its flaws, but it does have much more workable, real information.
And it doesn't talk to you like you're an idiot.(less)
|
|
|
If this book had been written seven years ago, it would have saved me seven years' worth of stress as a parent. I have always kept my children up to date with their immnunizations, but I have done so knowing that it was the best practice for society ...moreIf this book had been written seven years ago, it would have saved me seven years' worth of stress as a parent. I have always kept my children up to date with their immnunizations, but I have done so knowing that it was the best practice for society as a whole, but fearing that autism link in regards to my own babies. Until this year I had always declined to have my children immunized against the flu, again because of worries about thimerosol and autism. I did extensive research into the issue, but it was always in the form of articles that reinterpreted the scientific literature for a popular audience. Apparently, that last one was my big mistake, because I never thought not to trust the same story told by so many different publications.
After reading this book, I feel so much better about my decision to vaccinate. I could both kiss Seth Mnookin and hit Andrew Wakefield with a stick. Mnookin interpreted the scientific literature, explained the flaws in the anti-vaccine stance, and convinced me of the merits of his argument. I only wonder why his was the first voice I have ever heard who has done exactly that. My children's pediatrician told me that I was perfectly justified in avoiding the flu vaccine. My favorite parenting magazine, whose parenting philosophy I otherwise agreed with wholly, was devoutly anti-vaccine. A doctor aquaintance is fervently pro-vaccine, but implied that anti-vaccine parents were bad people.
The beauty of Mnookin's argument is that he lays the blame where it belongs--on journalists, talk show hosts, and people who, knowing that they have the country's ear, have a responsibility in what they say. Mnookin won me over utterly when he convinced me that he understood that most anti-vaccine parents are not bad people--they're just parents, terrified about their children's well-being. With that characterization, I can understand where they're coming from without feeling like I need to agree with them.(less)
|
|
|
Having one little girl who loves frillies and one little girl who hates frillies, this book is the best of both worlds for me, in that both of my girls really loved a lot of the garments in here.
Mind you, Okawa's photographer wins everyone over wi...moreHaving one little girl who loves frillies and one little girl who hates frillies, this book is the best of both worlds for me, in that both of my girls really loved a lot of the garments in here.
Mind you, Okawa's photographer wins everyone over with the full-page, glossy photos of that stinkin' cute little kid wearing almost every one of the outfits before you even get to the instructions and patterns, but still, her garments have so much potential that both my four-year-old and my six-year-old could look beyond the bland fabrics in the photographs (unbleached muslins, linens and cottons appear to be her fashion ethic--totally cool, but not to the taste of either of my kiddos) and point out what they would like to have, whether it was the quilted-top sundress in pink tulle instead of gauze(?) for one, or the peasant top in a vintage Transformers fabric instead of linen for the other.
And everyone, including myself, loves the headscarves--the vintage lace ties and the purposeful fringe are very clever details.(less)
|
" Dude, when you homestead, I think it's absolutely okay to start with, you know, a HOME! Flush toilets and electricity do not make one homestead-lite, ...moreDude, when you homestead, I think it's absolutely okay to start with, you know, a HOME! Flush toilets and electricity do not make one homestead-lite, in my opinion. If you don't have running water, or if you live in a yurt or something, I think that's more like radical homesteading.(less)"
|
|
|
|
This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it,
click here.
I'd heard of the Colfax family as fellow unschoolers, and I've read their book on homeschooling, and so of course the parts of the book that most interested me were the family's lifestyle choices that enabled their children to try out so many paths, and make so many achievements. I'm a little tiny bit suspicious that the reason these kiddos all grew so mature and industrious and can-do and practical is that their parents were a little tiny bit...um, impractical? Unpredictable? I'm not going to spoil for you all the adventures and entailing hijinks that led me to this idea, but I'll just tell you--that Africa trip was a total fiasco, and so was the Alaska business, if you ask me.
So, yeah, it was a family journey, and they came out in the end all pretty great, and sure, part of me wants to *want* to build my own home from scratch and clear the land by hand, you know, but mostly what I got out of the book was a profound re-appreciation of the joys and conveniences inherent in having my very own flush toilet.(less)
|
|
|
I am NOT interested in Christian-themed books, but this one is absolutely readable even so. I read this book as a compantion, really, to Unconditional Parenting, and frankly, I found this one to be much more practical in the short term. Unconditional...moreI am NOT interested in Christian-themed books, but this one is absolutely readable even so. I read this book as a compantion, really, to Unconditional Parenting, and frankly, I found this one to be much more practical in the short term. Unconditional Parenting goes on and on and on about how not to parent your kids, so much so that the first time I read it, I gave up on it before I even got past that, and was left thinking, "Well, what DO I do?"
How to Really Love Your Child, on the other hand, offers practical advice, and the reasoning behind it, from step one. Even if you haven't read far, and even if you're not ready to completely overhaul the way you parent, you can certainly start to make an effort to look your children directly in their eyes whenever you speak. And look your partner in the eyes, while you're at it. Hell, look EVERYONE in the eyes! It's a good beginning.
A couple of place in the book freaked me out a little--I could have just skipped that sensual bit altogther, thank you very much, and "appropriate boy affection"="whatever," in my mind--but overall the book rang true to me as a parent, and I think I'm doing a little bit of a better job because of it.(less)
|
|
|
Radical Homemakers, while readable, isn't really about homemaking, in my opinion. Homemaking as a defiance to consumer culture would absolutely include gardening, home canning, thrifting, etc., as Hayes describes it, but living without a J.O.B, homes...moreRadical Homemakers, while readable, isn't really about homemaking, in my opinion. Homemaking as a defiance to consumer culture would absolutely include gardening, home canning, thrifting, etc., as Hayes describes it, but living without a J.O.B, homeschooling the kiddos, forgoing health insurance, raising cows for meat--yeah, that's homesteading, right?
Of course the very fact that the book is "radical" means that it's likely going to be read as judgmental towards the vast swathes of humanity who aren't homesteaders, but I'm cool with that. I'm not a homesteader (although I would consider myself a radical homemaker, if anyone wants to write a book actually about that...), but I can happily read about the lifestyle. And the book was mostly readable. A few facts, a few suppositions, lots of anecdotes--it wasn't exactly a page-turner, but I was happy doing my time with it.
As a resource, I think Radical Homemakers would have been more valuable if the author had chosen to be either more analytical or more anecdotal. Frankly, there wasn't the depth of critical analysis present to make me buy especially the more "radical" assumptions, such as forgoing health insurance, or to understand the reasoning behind many of these homesteaders' choices to accept government health insurance or food aid. A bigger focus on anecdotes and interviews could have filled that gap by giving a better understanding of these homesteaders' perspectives. Alas...(less)
|
|
|
This book actually convinced me to make a skirt. Well, two skirts actually, but of COURSE I haven't finished one of them almost a year later, but one of these days...
I love the variety of projects available in the book, and the variety of audiences...moreThis book actually convinced me to make a skirt. Well, two skirts actually, but of COURSE I haven't finished one of them almost a year later, but one of these days...
I love the variety of projects available in the book, and the variety of audiences to sew for. The sizing seems a little wonky, however. My five-year-old just swims in her size small pajama pants, and her daddy's matching pajama pants are actually super wide on him, too. However, I had to add extra panels to the size large yard sale wrap skirt to make it fit me, and I despair of even trying the peasant top. And none of us really seem to be at any sort of extreme size-wise, so...
But the baby kimono top? Made a BEAUTIFUL baby shower gift. The book doesn't include a pattern for matching baby bottoms, but I made some from the sleeves of the blouse that I cut up to make the kimono top, and everything worked out pretty cute!(less)
|
to:
to:
to:
to:
