Writing Help-Group For Everyone discussion

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OUR STORY CORNER. > Stories You Guys Have Wrote.

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message 1: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Okay, so here you can post links to all the stories you wrote, get critisism, compliments, and the like!
It's interesting to read other's stories, even if they're not very long. :)


message 2: by Julius, He Who Arises in Might (:D) (new)

Julius (bookseeker007) | 1621 comments Mod
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

A bit of my poetry. (If one cares for such things.)


message 3: by Julius, He Who Arises in Might (:D) (new)

Julius (bookseeker007) | 1621 comments Mod
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

A little more poetry (but please keep in mind that I don't write poetry that most people do.)


message 4: by Julius, He Who Arises in Might (:D) (new)

Julius (bookseeker007) | 1621 comments Mod
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...

The saddest of the three. Please, enjoy.

(And to those of you who are wondering, no, I don't just write poetry. I should have some other things on here in time.)


message 5: by Jonathan, The Wise (new)

Jonathan (headspinningfromvagueness) | 495 comments Mod
Technically it's written but hey...
You can read three of my stories here http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...


message 6: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
COOL! :D

(I wasn't actually expecting anyone to comment, btw.)


message 7: by Jonathan, The Wise (new)

Jonathan (headspinningfromvagueness) | 495 comments Mod
Thanks for reading one of mine by the way Phoebe.


message 8: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Ur welcomez, Jonathan. It's awesome. :P :)


Pikachusbff (HIHIHIHIHI) | 430 comments MY STORIES ARE.....UNDER MY STORIES XD


message 10: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (last edited May 12, 2012 05:56AM) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
:) *nods and smiles at Pika*


message 12: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
You gonna post any links, pika? :)


message 13: by Linda (last edited May 13, 2012 05:17PM) (new)

Linda Cee (LindaCee) | 130 comments Note: This is kinda a sad story, I wrote it for a competition where the prompt was I've never thought much about how I would die, until now. I don't think it's my best writing either, but oh well, here it is anyway:

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...


message 14: by Julius, He Who Arises in Might (:D) (new)

Julius (bookseeker007) | 1621 comments Mod
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...

Here's a short story, written in verse form. To be read if one is feeling mellow.


message 15: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
lol.


message 16: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (last edited May 25, 2012 12:58AM) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...

It's called School Wars. I may change the title, though. This is one of my random stories I've created. I kinda think it sucks, though. :) :P
Only to be read if you feel revengeful.... and are the type that is easy to be made to laugh.
Or are up for something random. :P Critisism required. I need to know how to improve it a bit. My friend also remarked that the title is extremely similar to Star Wars: The Clone Wars. I had no idea until she said it.


message 17: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Anyone else got any stories of their own writing they would like to share? :)


christinE (Christine6454) | 6 comments I have the prologue of one that I started. It's my first story and I know it's not good...but here is the link anyways and please comment and give advice!!!

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...


message 19: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (last edited May 26, 2012 02:14AM) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Chapter 2 of the book I'm writing:

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...

It's about how the characters go to someone's house, says stuff, gets a reaction, and Ima gonna be adding some funny/revengeful stuff to it later.


message 20: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Anyone got any stories they would like to share?


message 21: by [deleted user] (last edited May 27, 2012 03:24PM) (new)

Well, I've been working on this story: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...

And I've also sort of been working on this one: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...

:)


message 22: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (last edited May 27, 2012 11:19PM) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Claire wrote: "Well, I've been working on this story: http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...

And I've also sort of been working on this one: http://www.goodreads.c..."

Yay! Me gonna read 'em. :)


message 23: by [deleted user] (new)

Yay, thank you. :D


ᑕᗢᗝᒪḰᓮᖙᖇᗢჯ123   ☆*・゜゚・*\(^O^)/*・゜゚・*☆  Cool (coolkidrox123) | 1362 comments Mod
“In a way, it's nice to know that there are Greek gods out there, because you have somebody to blame when things go wrong. For instance, when you're walking away from a bus that's just been attacked by monster hags and blown up by lightning, and it's raining on top of everything else, most people might think that's just really bad luck; when you're a half-blood, you understand that some devine force is really trying to mess up your day.”


message 25: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
So true. :P


message 26: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Claire wrote: "Yay, thank you. :D"

u'r welcomez! ^.^


message 27: by [deleted user] (new)

So many, where to start.


message 28: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Watermelon (In side joke.) wrote: "So many, where to start."

lol


message 29: by [deleted user] (new)

LoL xD


message 30: by [deleted user] (new)

Here is my most resent:

prologue
Mr. Kingston hugged Naomi, his daughter, for what he knew was the last time. She was going to a place where she would become a soldier. He tried desperately not to cry.
"Bye Naomi." Mr. Kingston swallowed.
"Bye daddy." Naomi said.
"George, she is just going to store. " His wife replied.
After he was done hugging her, Naomi skipped out of the tent they called home, with her jump in her back pocket and her blonde braid hair swaying behind her. After a while of watching the door, Mr. Kingston heard the scream. It was Naomi's voice.
"Naomi?" Mrs. Kingston yelled. No answer, and there never would be one.


Chapter one
"Cell 127 prisoner Naomi Kingston?" One of the guards screech.
"Present." Naomi yelled.
Naomi wasn't a prisoner. Well, at least she had a key to her cell. Really she could get up and walk out the door. All she would have to do is walk out the door and get past the motion detector guns, hunting traps, and the always hungry lions.
The guards finished role and head count. The prisoners were each taken back to their cell. Some of the prisoners, such as Magpie and Jonny, had gone mad sitting in a dusty old cell. Others had tried to escape and die. Naomi's friend Kenny had recently gone missing.
"Hey Red head, where is Kenny?" Naomi yelled to the guard.
"Prisoner of cell 128?" The red headed guard questioned.
"Yes." She scowled.
"None of your business, prisoner."
"Its Naomi! Why give us the key if we are prisoners?"
He smiled at her. She knew why, fear, they did it for their entertainment. Their sick minds loved the prisoner's fear.
She was push into her cell. It was a small limestone cave with one window, a desk, a phone, a bed, and a chest. It didn't make any sense to Naomi that they had caves in a skyscraper.
"Urgh!" Naomi kicked the wall "Ow!"
She sat down on her bed holding her foot. She rubbed it until it felt better.
She opened the chest and pulled out her only memory from her old life. A jump rope. Her sister, Janna, had taught her jump rope at a young age. She had enough room and time in her cell to jump. She was fairly good at it anyways. She started to jump, her thoughts racing.
"I hope Kenny is okay. Well let's see the odds are he's dead. If he tried to escape he was either eaten, shot, or caught. I would hope shot, if I was a person. I guess I lost the right of being a person when I became a prisoner. These gits, thinking they can take innocents and .......What did they take us for anyways?" Naomi thought.
She didn't know why she was here. That was a new question to ask red head. How had that not come up. It wasn't like she'd been too busy to ask him or anything. She'd been here for seven years? Six? No 8. Well, she got here when she was 7 and now she is 15.
"Yep, 8 years." she thought.
She felt tears in her eyes. She tried to blink them out, it didn't work. Why cry? She had barely known her family long to love them. The outside world was also full of horrors. If she wasn't here would she have friends? Did she have little siblings she didn't know about? Did her family still love her? Better yet, did she still have a family? All good questions with no answers.

This is just the beginning ;D


message 31: by [deleted user] (new)

Hmmm...


message 32: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Watermelon (In side joke.) wrote: "Here is my most resent:

prologue
Mr. Kingston hugged Naomi, his daughter, for what he knew was the last time. She was going to a place where she would become a soldier. He tried desperately not t..."


EPIC. :D


message 33: by [deleted user] (new)

Awesome! :D


message 34: by [deleted user] (new)

Thanks. Do you guys find it hard to finish a story? I don't know why but I hate finish stories.


message 35: by [deleted user] (new)

Watermelon (In side joke.) wrote: "Here is my most resent:

prologue
Mr. Kingston hugged Naomi, his daughter, for what he knew was the last time. She was going to a place where she would become a soldier. He tried desperately not t..."


This story sounds familliar


message 36: by [deleted user] (new)

Watermelon (In side joke.) wrote: "Thanks. Do you guys find it hard to finish a story? I don't know why but I hate finish stories."

I have the same problem, I start a story...but I never finish it. :O


message 37: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Claire wrote: "Watermelon (In side joke.) wrote: "Thanks. Do you guys find it hard to finish a story? I don't know why but I hate finish stories."

I have the same problem, I start a story...but I never finish ..."


My friends are always doing that. They must get tired of it, i guess....


message 38: by [deleted user] (new)

Yeah.


message 39: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Cx


HYPE


Rahma | 1 comments hello. I just wanted to say Hi to everyone I'm totally new to this but I've been writing for 3 months or 2 and I'm having soo much fun and trouble trying to finish it. It's like the book doesn't want me to finish it. I just don't know how to end my story heres the start. Tell me what you guys think :D Oh and I have a question. I'm 16, is it possible to publish a book at my age?
__________________________________________________________________

2 minutes till the bell rang. 5 questions left to answer, to make it worse the guy next to me is trying to copy off my paper. Mrs.Meyer is prompted on her chair, fingers tapping on her desk like a keyboard. Now one minute remains, Mrs.Meyer’s eyes and mine meet, and just for that second I thought she knew what I was thinking. With a blink she turns away. The bell rang, and everyone stood to leave, going by Mrs.Meyer’s desk to hand in their papers. When it was my turn to hand in my paper, she took it with a snap, cold nerves rushed through my body like freezing ice.


message 41: by [deleted user] (new)

Hi Rahma. :)

You write pretty good. :)


message 42: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Rahma wrote: "hello. I just wanted to say Hi to everyone I'm totally new to this but I've been writing for 3 months or 2 and I'm having soo much fun and trouble trying to finish it. It's like the book doesn't w..."

Hey, Rahma. And I agree with Claire- it was awesome. :D
Got any more?


message 43: by Julius, He Who Arises in Might (:D) (new)

Julius (bookseeker007) | 1621 comments Mod
Rahma wrote: "hello. I just wanted to say Hi to everyone I'm totally new to this but I've been writing for 3 months or 2 and I'm having soo much fun and trouble trying to finish it. It's like the book doesn't w..."

Hey, Rahma. In answer to your question yes, it is possible for you to publish a book at your age, but your parents will have to take care of certain things like the signing of contracts, the delivery of payments (if you self publish). If you somehow get picked up by a publishing house they will still have to have the permission of your parents or legal guardian. But yeah. And some peaple have published even younger.


message 44: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (last edited Jun 30, 2012 07:20PM) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
I'm bored, so I'm just gonna post the start of my friends story that I rewrote. I don't think she's ever gonna finish it, so I thought I'd try to rewrite the first chapter for fun. :)

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3...


message 45: by Jonathan, The Wise (new)

Jonathan (headspinningfromvagueness) | 495 comments Mod
I wrote another but this was more me just getting thoughts down so it likely needs future re-writing after I've let it sit for a while.

http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/2...


message 47: by Kelson (last edited Aug 31, 2012 01:37PM) (new)

Kelson Hargis | 17 comments Here are a couple of stories that I have written: One is on here http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3....
The other is 0.99 cents, sorry but I didn't realize that Booktango demanded that I charge. I don't expect anyone to buy it. But maybe you can offer feedback on the description, sample, and cover? http://bookstore.booktango.com/Produc...
I will be posting a couple more stories on here in the coming few weeks as well.


Kelson Hargis | 17 comments Rahma wrote: "hello. I just wanted to say Hi to everyone I'm totally new to this but I've been writing for 3 months or 2 and I'm having soo much fun and trouble trying to finish it. It's like the book doesn't w..."
Hey Rahma, I really like the beginning of this story. You also have something else alot of us don't (myself included without a lot of work) brevity. I did notice some opportunities in your excerpt to hone that as well. There was also some minor syntax issues. But all of that is part of the rewrite process. All in all I would say from that short excerpt that you write better than many people much more experienced than you may be at 16.


message 49: by Phoebe, FollowtheRabbitdowntheYellowbrickholeandentertheTARDIS(XD) (new)

Phoebe ~Music Is My Life~ (TheCrazyChick) | 3181 comments Mod
Kelson wrote: "Here are a couple of stories that I have written: One is on here http://www.goodreads.com/story/show/3....
The other is 0.99 cents, sorry but I didn't realize that Booktango..."


Wow. Love the first story! It makes you feel sad as if some part of your mind is within the character. Truly a good short story. Keep it up! :)


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