Weekly Short Stories Contest and Company! discussion

Weekly Short Story Contests > Week 110- (Jan 28th-Feb. 4th) Stories--- Topic: Morning DONE!

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message 1: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments You have until February 4th to post a story/poem and on the 5th and 6th we'll vote for which one we thought was best.

Please post directly into the topic and not a link. Please don't use a story previously used in this group.

Your story should be ONLY 100 to 4,500 words long.

REMEMBER! A short story is NOT a scene. It MUST have a BEGINNING, MIDDLE, and END.

The topic this week is: morning

The rules are pretty loose. You could write a story about anything that has to do with the subject. I do not care, but it must relate to the story somehow.

message 2: by Saira (new)

Saira (Herumouni) | 663 comments Nothing's coming this time. Guess I'll take a week off. One week was good, but two was pretty awesome for me. XD I'ma go work on those for a bit. :D

message 3: by M (new)

M | 9835 comments I can’t crank out a story a week, either, Saira--or even one a month. It’s not that a week isn’t long enough. I usually write a story in an afternoon or two. It’s as though my muse puts her hands on her hips and says, “Look! I coughed up a story for you last week.” I may see if I can write another Orchard Bay installment or two.

message 4: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments No stories for you two? What?! You guys better write one. I want some good competition this week after dropping out last week. :/

message 5: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Story should be up soon.

message 6: by Hanzleberry (new)

Hanzleberry (Doughboyissweet) | 1065 comments It's great so far! ;D

message 7: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (last edited Jan 30, 2012 10:02AM) (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Warning! This story does not contain evil doctors or lab coat wearing scientists. It does contain some language. Read at your own risk.

The Morning Swim
By Al

The morning light cascaded around the cedar deck and reflected off the hot, dark liquid in a coffee mug on the glass tabletop. The warm breeze from the lake a half a mile from his backyard behind a wall of trees made its way toward the house and tickled Kirte’s bare arms. He inhaled deeply allowing the fresh aroma of the morning dew enter his nostrils. Kirte picked up his coffee and inhaled its nutty hint. Mornings were always so beautiful.

“Hey, Kirte.”

Kirte smiled and set his mug back on the glass tabletop. “Morning, honey.”

A tall, dark-haired woman wearing a sheer, white nightgown took a seat next to him on the deck and gazed out at the wall of trees, smiling and sipping, what Kirte had assumed was tea out of her mug. Kirte took a paperback copy of Rebecca in his hand that had been resting on his lap. He opened it to the marked page and began reading.

“I heard that is a good book,” the dark-haired beauty spoke as she placed her brown ceramic mug onto the table. Her exposed leg traveled up his own leg under the table.

Kirte met her gaze. Her blue eyes sparkled at him. “It is,” he replied. “It has a dark edge to it. I think you’d like it.”

“Most likely.” She gazed back out at the trees. “It looks like it’s going to be a wonderful day.”

Abandoning his book by placing it on the table, he observed his wife curiously with much interest. The breeze flicked her ebony hair around her slim shoulders and the sun’s rays playfully danced in her sapphire eyes. He absorbed every detail in her face, her prominent nose, her long, thick eyelashes, her full, pale lips, her sharp jaw line and her line of freckles going down the side of her face to her neck, only small things he loved about Eris.

Kirte stood and went behind her wooden chair. He placed his hands on her shoulders and kissed the top of her head. Eris reached across her chest and put her hand on his.



“I think, maybe we should take the trees down. I don’t see why we need them blocking the view of the lake. The lake is so pretty.”

He pulled his face upward to look at the trees. Since he had bought the house and a piece of the lake, the wall of trees had been there. He didn’t really care for them. Maybe it would bring value to the house if he ever wanted to sell to get rid of them and make the view of the lake open, and since there were no neighbors around to say otherwise, it would be a good idea.

“You’re right, Eris. I don’t see why we shouldn’t take the trees down. The lake is a gorgeous view.”

“We should go swimming today. It’s such a beautiful day. I imagine the lake is warm.”

He touched her smooth dark hair. “That sounds good.”

She stood and stretched her arms upward, yawning. She then looked back at Kirte. He knew that look. It sent shivers of anticipation through his body. He watched her walk barefoot off the cedar deck and into the yard.

Eris took a piece of her long hair in her hand and twirled it around her finger as she looked back at her husband. “You coming or are you going to stand there with drool all over your chin?”

He stepped off the deck after her. “I’m coming.”

She smiled at him after licking her ample lips. “Close your eyes and count to ten and try to find me.”

He obeyed her, hardly able to stand the eagerness building up inside him.

“Keep them tightly closed!” she called out to him.

He heard her move into the trees, and started counting. “One…two…” he headed off the deck and started into the trees after her. “…three…four….”

Passing the tree line, he saw the view of the lake below him at the bottom of a hill, but Eris was nowhere around. Kirte started for the patch of trees to his right, passing a deserted nightgown.

“…Five…eight….” He heard rustling in the small wood in front of him. He stripped his shirt off of him.

“You’re supposed to keep your eyes closed, Kirte! You don’t play hide and seek with open eyes!” He heard another rustle from the patch of trees.

“Baby, now I know where you are. You’re supposed to keep silent, silly. It makes it more fu-.”

Her shrill scream stopped him from continuing his sentence. Terror struck his core. Why was she screaming?

Before Kirte could run into the trees to determine the reason for Eris’s scream, a figure emerged from the trees. A bloody knife was in his right, gloved hand. Kirte looked at the man in front of him wide-eyed. Preston Marcos, his coworker from the office, but what was he doing here?

“Hello, Kirte.” Preston, though short had always appeared to be tall to Kirte. He now seemed even taller. Kirte always felt something like animosity towards Preston, but that emotion felt ten times stronger now. Preston’s black eyes glinted in the bright sunlight as he spoke.

“Preston? What, what’s going on?” Kirte glanced behind Preston to catch a glimpse of his wife.

“She’s dead,” Preston said, twirling the bloodied knife in his hand. “You know, I’ve always wondered what she looked like naked. Now I don’t have to fantasize. Pity, I hope it was you who was going to be the first one down here so I wouldn’t have to kill her before getting my chance to have a piece of that scrumptious being. Oh, well.”

Rage flooded Kirte. He shouted for Eris, but she didn’t appear from behind the trees. He wanted to attack Preston, shove his own knife into him repeatedly as he prayed for Eris to come back to him.

“I told you, she’s dead. She can’t hear you. She’s gone. Stabbed that pretty, tight abdomen of hers. Her scream was wonderful. I scared the hell out of her.” Preston stopped twirling the knife in his hand and inspected it. “Her blood…it’s prettier than her body.”

Something inside Kirte was telling him to run, but his feet were planted firmly to the ground. “Why, why did you-?”

“Oh, come on, Kirte.” Preston took a step closer to him and clutched the knife tighter in his hand. “Don’t tell me you didn’t see this coming. I left plenty of clues. Like that box with the broken watch? Yep, that was from me. I thought it was a nice touch telling you your time was up.” Preston cackled loudly almost piercing Kirte’s ears.

“Why? Why my wife? She, she didn’t deserve it.”

Preston stopped advancing towards Kirte. “Didn’t deserve it? Do you know what that slut did behind your back? Yeah, that’s right. She was sleeping with other guys behind your back and when she refused me….”

He threw the knife at Kirte. The weapon struck him, blade first into his abdomen. He gasped sharply and fell backwards. Preston towered over him.

“I can’t stand rejection, Kirte. She had you, she had Jerry from accounting, she had Connor the workman for Christ’s sake! But she didn’t want me! What kind of woman doesn’t want me?”

Kirte coughed violently. Pain coursed through him and black found the corners of his vision. His Eris…his Eris…he couldn’t believe Preston. He didn’t want to believe it.

“Yeah, Kirte. I hope it hurts. I hope you suffer. Your precious Eris was a whore! Hear that? A whore! She slept with everyone in the office except me!”

No, not Eris. It couldn’t be true. He knew it wasn’t true. Preston was trying to get him to hate her, but Kirte never would hate her. He loved her. He loved her until the moment he took his last breath.

After Kirte was long gone, Preston removed the knife from his torso and wiped a bead of sweat from his brow. He turned around the face the patch of trees.

“He’s dead, you can come out now.”

Eris, naked with a strand of dark hair twirled around her fingers, emerged from the woods. She smiled and met Preston and wrapped her arms around him.

“Thanks, Pres,” she said with a cool voice. “I wouldn’t have been able to do it myself.”

Preston brought the blade to his shirt and wiped the homemade false blood mixed with Kirte’s real blood onto the blue fabric, which he would later burn.

“I’d do anything for you, Eris. You know that. Even if it means killing a man.” He dropped the knife onto the grass and pulled his nude lover into a kiss.

Eris ran her hands down his chest and gazed into one of his dark eyes and said with a cool, sensuous voice, “Now we can be together without him interfering. You’re the only one for me.”

Yes, Preston may have been the only one for her, but soon, as always, Eris would grow tired of him and desire for another man to replace him just like any other black widow. As she persuaded Preston, she would persuade that other man to eliminate him, and that wouldn’t be long. Preston, like the other twenty-seven lovers could only please her for so long, for it was power, manipulation and blood Eris really lusted for.

message 8: by Edward (new)

Edward (EdwardThereseJr) | 2472 comments ... Preston?

Anyway, thumbs up from me. I like how Preston told Kirte that Eris was dead. I took a moment to consider that sentence, since it seemed rather insistant, like he needed Kirte to believe it up front - in other words, it was a natural hint of a lie, without certainty.

message 9: by Saira (new)

Saira (Herumouni) | 663 comments Sorry, Al, but I seem to have exhausted my creativity at the moment.

message 10: by Saira (new)

Saira (Herumouni) | 663 comments Good story. :)

message 11: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Thanks. Yes, Preston. Got a problem?

Lol kidding...Hannah wanted him to be named Preston.

message 12: by Edward (new)

Edward (EdwardThereseJr) | 2472 comments I just finished reading One Door Away from Heaven hours ago. The antagonist in that was named Preston.

message 13: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Oh, hahaha.

message 14: by Edward (new)

Edward (EdwardThereseJr) | 2472 comments Of course, "morning" would prompt pleanty of mentions of coffee.

message 15: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Of course.

message 16: by Hanzleberry (new)

Hanzleberry (Doughboyissweet) | 1065 comments I didn't pick the name Preston. :/ I picked Marcos.

message 17: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Oh, that's right. I forgot. :/

message 18: by Saira (new)

Saira (Herumouni) | 663 comments Do you have more to that story? I'm intrigued as to why Eris would kill her husband. Even though I barely know the characters.

I could try some funny conversation about Deniol hating mornings...Ooh, I think I got something, but I gotta finish my Russian first! Yes, I've taken this long to actually get to it...>.<

message 19: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments I could write more, but I like to leave my readers guessing. Hmm...I'll write more and see if I like it.

message 20: by M (last edited Jan 30, 2012 05:57AM) (new)

M | 9835 comments Definitely a shocker! This makes everything in the seduction thread look tame. In the initial scene, I couldn’t tell who was who at first, and thought there were two women and a man. The ending took me completely by surprise, but where does the blood on the knife come from? And why would Preston have killed him out in the open, where it could be witnessed, when he could just as easily have killed him in the house?

message 21: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments I'm adding more to it. Glad you found it shocking! I thought the ending was going to be predictable.

message 22: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Oh, when I edited it I had a paragraph explaining Kirte owned the lake and the no one lived around there for miles, but I can't seem to find it in here. I don't think I copied and pasted that one.

message 23: by M (new)

M | 9835 comments It really builds the tension! You’re very good at this.

message 24: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Thanks!

message 25: by Saira (new)

Saira (Herumouni) | 663 comments I wasn't confused...yeah, I was too tired to mention most of what M did. XD But I really liked it. Still tired and have the long bus ride to Russian today...XP

message 26: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Oh...wow. I just checked my email and my World Religions prof just email us a surprise homework assignment that's due today...at two right after my Psychology class....Thanks, man...you just really made my day.

message 27: by Saira (new)

Saira (Herumouni) | 663 comments That sucks. I'd probably enjoy it, though. I always leave thing for the last minute. Why is that last word not looking right to me?! DX

message 28: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Yes, it's supposed to be an essay though and I just wrote two paragraphs, but I have to go to Psych, so I'm going to have to work on it there. :/ Have fun with Russian! I have to go to class...ick.

message 29: by Edward (new)

Edward (EdwardThereseJr) | 2472 comments I shall write today ... probably in English class; if there is anything I actually need to take notes on I'll write 'em in the margins.

I shall also begin with coffee.

message 30: by M (new)

M | 9835 comments I almost always begin with coffee. I say “almost” because I got up one morning about a year ago, only to discover that I had forgotten to buy more and was out. I drove to the store at five o’clock in the morning.

message 31: by Edward (last edited Jan 30, 2012 08:03AM) (new)

Edward (EdwardThereseJr) | 2472 comments Then you found out that they don't open until eight and start banging on the front door, screaming, "Let me in, let me in! I need my morning fix!" The police were shortly thereafter brought in, during which they searched you for cocaine and methephetamines.

... or not.

message 32: by M (new)

M | 9835 comments Actually, I found the police and said, “I’m out of cocaine and methamphetamines!” After searching a couple of suspicious-looking characters who happened to be lurking, they came back to me and said, “Will this do?”

message 33: by Edward (new)

Edward (EdwardThereseJr) | 2472 comments Well ... was it enough?

message 34: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Probably not, M needs a gallon sized ziplock a day to get his daily fix.

Hmm, M, if you keep that up, I have a feeling you'll end up like Frank after Penelope fired all his neurons off with the twitchy left eye. You should go to rehab.

Haha, well, I got my Psychology of Gender quiz done early and wrote out a bit more of The morning Swim, so I'll type it up and post it.

message 35: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments There you go, hopefully it clears up why she did what she did.

message 36: by Kat, straight up goddess (new)

Kat (psych-enthusiast) | 2907 comments Nice job, Al. I don't think I'll participate in the story part, but I have a poem :D

message 37: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Thanks!

Not you too!! :/ Ah, well. Yay! Poem! Can't wait to read it!

message 38: by Kat, straight up goddess (new)

Kat (psych-enthusiast) | 2907 comments I think my creative juices have been used up XD

message 39: by M (new)

M | 9835 comments I’m on my third cup. Life’s just fine.

message 40: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments I'm about to head over to the coffee shop three blocks away to study. I can't take it here in this apartment anymore! Lol.

message 41: by Kat, straight up goddess (new)

Kat (psych-enthusiast) | 2907 comments Lol. GO ALEX! WOOOO!

message 42: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments I'm sorry, what? Lol.

message 43: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Blank. I'm out of cash. No coffee shop for me. *DERP*

message 44: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Wow. I can't believe my dad. He just said he cut his hand on a broken glass while washing it. I asked if he was okay, and he said he would be if I did the dishes instead. Seriously? I left some dishes after doing most of them to take a study break because I have a test in Government tomorrow and he walks away saying, "Well, you're always busy. That's why I do the dishes." What the...? How could he even say that? I do the dishes everyday because mum and him don't do them. I seriously only took a thirty minute break and he was freaking out because the dishes weren't done. Parents!

Ugh, I'm really wishing I had two dollars on me to go to the coffee shop now.

message 45: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments And you just witnessed an Alex rant. Sorry....

My parents should be lucky I don't say what's on my mind. I come here instead and tell you people. Unfortunately for you, you have to face the wrath of Al.

Oh, wow...you guys heard of Kama Sutra? It was very awkward hearing the world religions prof talking about that today. He even showed pictures. I think more than half the class, including myself, slipped out to vomit in the hallway. It wasn't pleasant.

message 46: by Edward (new)

Edward (EdwardThereseJr) | 2472 comments I know what the Kama Sutra is. Haven't read it yet and probably won't for years.

Alex rants are welcome here.

message 47: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Oh, good. I feel like if I just write my feelings down and not share to anyone, I'm going to burst.

Heh, yeah...I don't plan on reading it ever...though once I'm married I'll probably think otherwise.

Ew, that was even too much information for me.

message 48: by Hanzleberry (new)

Hanzleberry (Doughboyissweet) | 1065 comments Gross. Alex, you need some sister time to rant and talk strange. ;)

message 49: by Alex, Mistress of the Realm (new)

Alex (Almyeags) | 11787 comments Hahaha, I know! I'm listening to the Black Keys, Han! This guy has some moves! Lol


message 50: by Saira (new)

Saira (Herumouni) | 663 comments Yay, more. ^_^

I'm taking a friend to a cafe after our French test tomorrow. Sorry, all the coffee talk reminded me and I really can't wait! XD

No idea what the Kama Sutra is...

I'll try something if no one else posts, but it won't be much and Al would still win anyway...

.....I lost my train of thought. Tired from PT. Going to take a shower, eat dinner and go to bed. Actually, I need to see if I have any Spanish homework...

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Weekly Short Stories Contest and Company!

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Books mentioned in this topic

Psychological Types (other topics)
C.G. Jung: His Myth in Our Time (other topics)
Modern Man in Search of a Soul (other topics)
Analytical Psychology, Its Theory and Practice: The Tavistock Lectures (other topics)
The Great Mother: An Analysis of the Archetype (other topics)

Authors mentioned in this topic

Von Franz Marie Louise (other topics)
Erich Neumann (other topics)