Yep! Those are two I remember. Great man! Wonderful come backs.

Jim wrote: "... I believe Winston Churchill was another who was wonderful at put downs. ..."

Yes, I found some of Churchill's put-downs (attributed) at Wiki:

Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if I were your wife, I'd poison your tea.
Churchill: And if you were my wife, I'd drink it.
-----------------------------------
Bessie Braddock: Sir, you are drunk.
Churchill: And you, madam, are ugly. But in the morning, I shall be sober.

Above are from: http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Winston_Chu...

Bierce was quite a card. Look up his entry on Wikipedia sometime (I haven't & should). Very interesting man.

I believe Winston Churchill was another who was wonderful at put downs. I used to have a book full of them, but I just looked for it & seem to recall I got rid of it when I moved.

Good ones, Jim!
I did a search of my digital quote collection for quotes I have from _The Devil's Dictionary_. Below are the ones I found:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
BEAUTY, n. the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.

EDIBLE, adj. Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.

HAPPINESS: n. An agreeable sensation arising from contemplating the misery of others.

HEATHEN, n. A benighted creature who has the folly to worship something that he can see and feel.

ABSTAINER, n. A weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One of my favorite authors is Ambrose Bierce. He wrote The Devil's Dictionary The Lexicon of Choice for Satirists, Cynics, Skeptics & other Enlightened Souls A 365-Day Calendar for 2006. It's a great book.

- An egotist is a person of low taste - more interested in himself than in me.

- Anoint, v.: To grease a king or other great functionary already sufficiently slippery.

- Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.

- Convent - a place of retirement for women who wish for leisure to meditate upon the sin of idleness.
Ambrose Bierce

- Corporation: An ingenious device for obtaining profit without individual responsibility.
Ambrose Bierce

- Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.

Reader's Digest used to have a section called "The Perfect Squelch".

I googled and found a funny lady talking about it. She said: "The Perfect Squelch" ... where they'd offer what they determined to be prime examples of verbal 'one-up-man ship,' that is, great retorts and comebacks and retaliations."

I found the above quote at: http://www.unlikelystories.org/old/perfe...
If you have time, the poster at the above link tells two anecdotes which end with two PERFECT SQUELCHES! LOL

Jim wrote: "I've heard that one. It's a good one."

I love a good comeback. :)

I've heard that one. It's a good one.

I came across the following message online. Had to share it. Feel free to add your own great "comeback" anecdote.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"I took my dad to the shopping centre the other day to buy some new shoes (he is 92). We decided to grab a bite to eat. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colours: green , red , orange , and blue . My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time. When the teenager had had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's up grandpa, never done nothin' wild in your life?' Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response, knowing he would have a good one, and in classic style he did not bat an eye in his response. 'Got drunk once, and had sex with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son.'"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~