Ruth wrote: "Insult kit! What fun, Suzanne. I doubt I'll find much I can use there, the words I use have to fit the language of the poem, but I love it anyway.

It would be fun to write a tongue-in-cheek poem..."

The "Shakespespeare Insult Kit" is rather good! won't be stuck for words in a long day's march!

Virtriends? (Virtual friends)

God knows I have more of those than I do friends in real life.

How can the word friend possibly describe both the people you went to school with or see/know in person and the people to whom you are connected through Facebook and MySpace?
Are friends on the social sites really friends?
Is there a better word to describe someone who follows you on Twitter?
Do you think that the English language could use some new words to differentiate among varying levels and types of friendship?

How about Griends for GR friends?
or Faciends for FB friends?
Twitiend??? :-) for Twitter follower....

What else pops up???

I was given a magnetic insult kit for Christmas. http://ep.yimg.com/ip/I/fridgedoor_2059_... My fridge was quite entertaining for a while.

Insult kit! What fun, Suzanne. I doubt I'll find much I can use there, the words I use have to fit the language of the poem, but I love it anyway.

It would be fun to write a tongue-in-cheek poem using those insults, wouldn't it?

I don't really want to insult the poor guy. I just want to point out some of his less desirable characteristics.

A word play course? Sounds intriguing. What else did you study besides insult?

Ruth wrote:....
I'm making a list, folks."

Ruth, I recently took a word play course at a CC and we were given a "Shakespespeare Insult Kit" which was a hoot to call out our faves!

I just found a link on-line...there are so great ideas for you here, I think!

Insult Kit

Who thinks she knows at least one "Mammering Motely-Minded Mait Worm" :-) and adores the use of alliteration in poetry!

Woohoo!!!!

Oh, no. I get other names. Ones too intimate to share with Ruth.

Heehee!
I just meant that I hoped you were not on the receiving end of any of those.....terms of endearment!!!

On the other hand, a fistfight is a "no-gun fuss."

Newengland wrote: "Gee, THANKS, Deb. For the vote of confidence, I mean. Do I come across as a "no-fun Gus"?"

HMMMMMMMM??? I need to think about that.... :-)

Gee, THANKS, Deb. For the vote of confidence, I mean. Do I come across as a "no-fun Gus"?

Oh....my.....gawd!!!! NE, you poor baby!! First-hand knowledge?

mustard stain, lint clump, pregnant paws, phlegm lodge, used oil, baneful ballast, wretched refuse, wasp spit, moral dandruff, athlete's footnote, no fun Gus, moment killer, smug toad, underchair gum, male pustule.

Thanks, Gail. Now those are helpful words.

I'm making a list, folks.

David, Thank you! Perhaps we are related in some way: we seem to know the same songs and assorted oddlot info.

Ruth, sorry. How about skunk, stinker, shnook, shlep, schnorrer (beggar), toad, turd, turkey (I guess that would only work if the poem were humorous), wart, wooden-head, weasel, wastrel, lout, lump, loser, donkey, dogan, dolt, dunderhead. Uh, that's all, I think, for now.

Vicki Dugan
This, of course, is "cultural history."

I should call him an elephant????

Well, he was a Republican, but elephant?

Oh, I remember this well from the Limelighters, a trio who sang many, many eclectic songs on their folk-style albums in the 60's. Vicki Dugan (a woman who purportedly wore a backless dress)comes to mind:

Vicki turn your back on me,
Come on, darlin', just for me;
'Cause there is something so appealing
That your eyes are not revealing;
Oh ho, Miss Dugan, you're for me.

Oh yes, a word: um....elephant

I like the Cannibal song better.....

You said it, hippopotamus.

Flanders and Swann?

At least a dog tick won't transmit Lyme Disease. For that, a deer tick, my dear, is needed.

(Have some madeira, m'dear
It's very much nicer than beer
I don't care for sherry, one cannot drink stout
And port is a wine I can well do without
It's simply a case of 'chacun a son gout'
Have some madeira, m'dear")

dog tick of the soul

"A patient man am I, down to my fingertips,
The sort who never could, ever would,
Let an insulting remark escape his lips.

"A very gentle man."

(fingers crossed behind back)

Schweinehund!! Perfect Ruth.....noun, expressive, 'sh' sound, 2 syllables for impact.....
Fancy David coming up with the perfect epithet!

Immer der Schweinehund, nie der Schwein
(Always the pigdog, never the pig).

Wow, David, what a fertile mind you have! I love some of your phrases. And yours, too, Debbie.

I'll try some of them. But I should have made myself clearer. There is a chance I could use a phrase instead of the 3 words I've used, but mostly I'm looking for single words. The three words constitute one line of my poem. And I want them gentler than the ones I've got.

I'm counting on you guys!

pig-dog, pedant, pompous fool, jackal, lamprey......these spring readily to mind but I need more time to come up with some really good ones!!

narcissist, dog in the manger, miser, cheapskate, pious fraud, poseur, pantywaist, blind bat, bigot, snob, trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years, starvelling, you eel-skin, you dried neat's-tongue, you bull's-pizzle, you stock-fish--O for breath to utter what is like thee!-you tailor's-yard, you sheath, you bow-case, you vile standing tuck! (Last 2/3 from Will, not I).

And I don't even know the poor sob.

I’ve been working on a poem called Horoscope for an Ex-Husband, in which I call forth a disastrous future for him. It’s written in a style reminiscent of the horoscopes you read in the newspapers.

Right toward the end, I’m calling him names. But the names I’ve used, “Shylock, shyster, scavenger,” are too strong. I like the alliteration of the s and sh sounds, but I think the meaning of the words may be a little over the top for the poem.

The only words I can come up with to replace them are adjectives, like self-centered,
self-righteous, holy-than-thou, oblivious, blind, ungenerous, unaware, selfish, intolerant sanctimonious, careless, self-justifying, etc.

I want nouns. Can anyone here come up with the nounish equivalents of some of these words? Or with other nouns that are not quite so derogatory as the ones I’ve come up with?