Memoirs of Kevyn Gettin' It On
by Dante
genre:
Humor
description:
Follow Kevyn on his adventures through an impromptu after party with two strippers.
chapters
chapter 1:
Chapter 1 of 1
Chapter 1 of 1
chapter 1
—
updated 01/16/08
—
2380 characters
—
0 people liked it
He went to pick up Jen at Paradise City, a strip joint just across the state border in West Virginia. Jen commuted to West Virginia for work because Virginia does not have strip joints. At least not proper ones that allow you to remove panties and pasties (and rake in the dough). Jen had gotten to work that day with a friend but that friend forgot about Jen's lack of transport and just left after her last dance. Kevyn, being the upstanding chivalrogue he was, went to pick her up. But at the time of Jen's call, he was playing with another freshman student. Her name was Victoria. So she tagged along! When they got to Paradise City, the bouncer had already been alerted to K & V's errand. Their cover charge was waived.
That moment – that brief feeling of celebrity - is what got Victoria emotionally charged for some wild monkey love.
Long story short, all three of them went back to Kevyn's house on Broad Street and got a little loopy and proceeded to disrobe thanks to a wee bit of Kevyn's roommate's Absinthe.
This moment - the brief feeling of cosmopolitan taste - is what got Jen fiercely ready for several rounds of uninhibited mountain goat-style action.
Kevyn caught a glimpse of the sports ticker on his laptop. He noticed that the Devils beat the Rangers 5-0.
It was this moment - proving that Mark Messier is a pussy - is what prepared Kevyn for hot one-on-one-on-one "file sharing" if you know what I mean.
After they untangled the pantyhose from the aftermarket ceiling fan, he laid Jen down on the subwoofer. Kevyn plugged in his sitar; Victoria plugged in the double dong. He strummed the indigenous riffs and Jen exploded off the amp and into the next room. Kevyn's roommate slept like a stone so they basically had free range to GET *right fist pump* IT *left fist pump* ON *hip thrust*. However Kevyn didn't know what to do so he just turkey slapped the ladies. Victoria freaked out and waited for a cab at the Lutheran Church up the street. Jen liked the face-meating and gave Kevyn her wad of thong cash. Inside it was a rare $2 Jefferson bill that made Kevyn instantly download in his pants. Jen called the cops on him and to this day Kevyn will never forget the day he had a threesome with two freshmen girls.
All donations for springing Kevyn from a Mexican jail can be mailed to: 800 Donkey Lane, Tijuana Mexico 32321.
back to top
That moment – that brief feeling of celebrity - is what got Victoria emotionally charged for some wild monkey love.
Long story short, all three of them went back to Kevyn's house on Broad Street and got a little loopy and proceeded to disrobe thanks to a wee bit of Kevyn's roommate's Absinthe.
This moment - the brief feeling of cosmopolitan taste - is what got Jen fiercely ready for several rounds of uninhibited mountain goat-style action.
Kevyn caught a glimpse of the sports ticker on his laptop. He noticed that the Devils beat the Rangers 5-0.
It was this moment - proving that Mark Messier is a pussy - is what prepared Kevyn for hot one-on-one-on-one "file sharing" if you know what I mean.
After they untangled the pantyhose from the aftermarket ceiling fan, he laid Jen down on the subwoofer. Kevyn plugged in his sitar; Victoria plugged in the double dong. He strummed the indigenous riffs and Jen exploded off the amp and into the next room. Kevyn's roommate slept like a stone so they basically had free range to GET *right fist pump* IT *left fist pump* ON *hip thrust*. However Kevyn didn't know what to do so he just turkey slapped the ladies. Victoria freaked out and waited for a cab at the Lutheran Church up the street. Jen liked the face-meating and gave Kevyn her wad of thong cash. Inside it was a rare $2 Jefferson bill that made Kevyn instantly download in his pants. Jen called the cops on him and to this day Kevyn will never forget the day he had a threesome with two freshmen girls.
All donations for springing Kevyn from a Mexican jail can be mailed to: 800 Donkey Lane, Tijuana Mexico 32321.
Did you like this?
vote
