I stared. I just couldn't help it.

She was stepping down my street, so far away I wouldn't have recognized her if I hadn't seen, dreamed, and thought of her a million times. A small smile curved the lips on her pale face, her golden-red hair hanging in her ocean-like eyes a little bit. Diana.

An oddly-shaped object hit me in the arm. Hard. Um, ouch! Oh yeah, Ryan. We were supposed to be playing football, weren't we? Poor guy. He had to put up with this a lot.

"Dude!" my older brother exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air. "That's the third time this week! I'm gonna pull my hair out or something." He tugged at his reddish-brown curls in exasperation.

"Stop complaining. You're not the one who got hit in the arm." I massaged the point of impact gently.

"Okay, Aaron. I'm telling you this as your friend and as your big brother: Give up. She's got a boyfriend. Sorry man, but that's just the way it is."

"Thanks for that little pep-talk, Ry, but I don't give a crap about her boyfriend," I stated, passing the ball back to him with unnecessary force. "I'm just waiting for them to break up. It's gotta happen eventually. Relationships from high school just don't last."

I was saying that more to comfort myself than to inform Ryan. It was great having an older brother, but sometimes his conversations were just not what I needed. I also told myself that so I could think of something positive about not dating Diana yet. Now I was out of high school, maybe I had a better chance.

"Sure, sure. I'm telling you, though, don't wait around for her. Find another girl for now."

"Do you know anything about loving someone at all, bro?" I groaned. It was my turn to be annoyed with him. "It's not exactly a pick-and-choose business."

"Aaron, of course I know about it. I'm engaged."

I didn't need a reminder about that. His fiancee, Janine, was around pretty much 24/7. Not that I didn't like her. Janine fit right in with my family, and she was better than all the girls Ryan had ever dated.

"What I mean is," he went on, "find someone else to pass the time, someone you have fun with. Maybe it will develop into something more."

"But I don't want it to," I complained. "I don't want to have fun with anyone else. I want to have fun with her." I nodded in Diana's general direction for emphasis.

"Look, she's getting pretty close, so we should stop talking about this. Why don't you just start talking to her? She's nice. She'll listen."

"But who'd want to listen to their best friend's brother?"

Diana's best friend was my sister, Emily, younger than me by a year. I had to thank Emily for that, or else I wouldn't have seen Diana as much as I did. Being related to your crush's best friend also had its downsides, though, especially if that relative was observant like Emily.

"You've been acting weird around my friends and me lately," she had said after Diana left one night. "What's up?"

"Nothing," I'd replied, knowing she wouldn't buy it.

"Come on."

"I don't know if I can tell you, Emily."

"You shouldn't have said that! Now I won't rest until I know. I swear, I can keep a secret."

"No, trust me, you don't want to keep this secret."

"Maybe I do!"

"No, I don't think you do."

"Well how will I know if you don't tell me?" she argued.

"If I tell you and you decide you don't want to keep it, then I'm doomed, so are you absolutely sure?"

"Yes." She attempted being serious for a few moments.

I had debated whether to actually tell her for almost thirty seconds. I'd really needed someone to talk to about this besides Ryan. Emily was my only other sibling, and I didn't particularly enjoy discussing girls with Mom and Dad.

"Okay," I sighed. "But if you tell anyone, I swear on Grandpa McKinley's grave you'll regret it for life."

She had nodded solemnly, and I had told her. After a few minutes of "Really?! Diana?!" and "Oh my gosh, that is so... wow!" the conversation had ended. Or at least my side of it had.

I slowly came back to the present, shaking off the memory. She was a few hundred yards away now.

"We should start playing again. We want to look normal," Ryan said, tossing the football to me.

As if Ryan knew how to be normal. "But-"

"Just let me handle it. You'll get to talk to her, don't worry."

I shuddered and almost dropped the ball at the thought of Ryan "handling" things.

"Hey, Diana," Ryan called when she was about fifty yards away.

"Hey, Diana," I echoed, turning around to face her.

I began feeling symptoms I always seemed to get when Diana was around: quickening breaths, accelerated heart rate, the usual.

"Hi Ryan. Hi, Aaron." She smiled at me. I was amazed she even cared to remember my name.

"What brings you over here?" I asked, giving Ryan as little opportunity to embarrass me and at the same time trying to learn more about her. I knew very well that she came this way every day, but I wanted to know why.

"Oh, I just like taking walks in this area," she explained in her kind alto. "I do it every day."

I wanted to say "Oh, I know", but I didn't want to seem like a creeper, so I canned it. Hmm. No new information.

"That's cool," was the reply I came up with. Very articulate, Aaron. Let's try again. "Do you just like this place, or...?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that," she laughed. "I like going to the park down the street, too."

Why did she have to be so mysterious?

"That sounds fun. Would you mind if I walked you back home?"

What had I just done? Why? Had those words really just come out of my mouth?

"No, not at all." She smiled at me again, and I smiled back, trying not to show my embarrassment at what I'd just gotten myself into.

"Okay then," I said. "Awesome."

"See you, Ryan," she waved.

I turned to look back at Ryan, rolling my eyes at him. He'd sure handled things well. Of course I'd gotten to talk to her! He had said two words the entire time.

"See you, Diana." He ignored my half-glare and gave me an enthusiastic thumbs up as he ran inside.

**

"Are you doing anything this summer?" I almost laughed at my attempt at conversation. Of all the things I could have chosen to talk about...

"Not much," she speculated. "I'm going to California for a few days next week, and then I'm going on the senior trip in August. What about you?" (The trip for the seniors this year was to Hawaii. Diana and I were both graduated seniors.)

"Eh, I've already gone on my only vacation. My family went to Moab for three days. Now I'm just awaiting the senior trip."

"So you're going, too? That will be fun."

"Yeah, I bet it will."

"Hey, what college are you going to?" She changed the subject.

"I'm heading to SUU in Cedar City in the fall. What about you?" I cringed at the possibility of being states away from Diana. I hoped she would at least stay in Utah.

"Seriously? SUU? That's where I'm going," she laughed.

"Wow. That's intense." I laughed with her. Yes! Same college! "Do you mainly want to go there for the arts program, or other reasons?"

"The art part is mainly what convinced me that it was the school for me," she told me. "I also have some family down there, so that's pretty convenient. I might not be able to stay with them, but at least I'll be close to someone."

"Yeah, that would be nice."

"Do you have anyone down there?"

"Well, one of my friends might be going, too, but other than that, I'm a loner," I chuckled.

"That's too bad," she said.

"Haha. Thanks. It'll be fine, though."

We reached the park and began walking through the field, ducking away from the occasional frisbee or soccer ball.

"Hey, do you like ultimate frisbee?" I asked.

"Heck yes. I love it!"

"Well that's good, because my brother and I were thinking of getting some people together tonight to play. Would you want to come?"

"I actually have a date tonight with James," she confessed. My heart sank a little. The boyfriend. "But, maybe I could convince him to play instead. Where would we be playing?"

"Probably here," I said. I was glad she at least wanted to, even if she couldn't. "About six o'clock."

"Okay, I hope I can come. Thanks for inviting me!"

"Anytime. So which way is your house?"

"It's just down this street, the one with the swing in front."

"Got it." Her house was too close. Why couldn't she live ten miles away?

We arrived at her house, mostly in silence.

"Thanks for walking with me," she smiled and continued up the sidewalk to her front door. "Hopefully I'll see you tonight."

"You're welcome. Hope to see you, too." I waved goodbye and watched her slip through the door.