New York, New York
by Alisha
genre:
Biographies & Memoirs
description:
this isn't a book, it's a blog!
chapters
chapter 1:
waterfalls and urethras
waterfalls and urethras
chapter 1
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updated 08/29/07
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2801 characters
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0 people liked it
I have just returned from a whirlwind tour, as they say, of the East Coast. In eight short days I have been over the border to Canada to see the over-commercialized and terribly over-priced Niagara Falls; through the aviary, near aforementioned tourist trap, where I got to feed two lovely Rainbow Lorikeets for the rock-bottom price of $2; ripped off by a Canadian ATM and then again by a currency converter; and harassed by a border guard about half my age who thought the fact that I was from California but visiting New York seemed quite suspicious.
After that lovely field trip we travelled to Ohio, where we drove an hour out of our way on Highway 6 (really just a poorly-marked residential street) based on MapQuest's directions. Spite, ire, and malice towards the makers of that horrible blight on the internet's otherwise unblemished reputation. We arrived at the hotel around midnight, fell asleep and woke up early for our first day at Cedar Point, which is apparently the largest amusement park in The World. There were seventeen- seventeen, mind you- large and nauseau-inducing roller coasters in this sprawling park. We managed to get most of them done before we crawled home hot and exhausted. My favorite- Top Thrill Dragster- goes from 0-120 mph in 4 seconds: I never knew it was possible to experience such severe feelings of nausea while still grinning from ear to ear.
The next morning, waiting in line for our second coaster of the day, I was overcome by the urgent need to pee. I decided to forego the ride and walk through to the other side of the track to run to the bathroom. Lucky for me, the roller coaster gods were smiling and an unnamed person on the car in front of me decided to take their camera along for the ride, flouting rules, regulations, personal safety, and the lives of everyone on and around the coaster. I asked to pass through the gates to go to the bathroom and was denied. I had to wait while one, two, three policemen came, the rider was reprimanded and escorted off. Only after that ordeal was I allowed, knees crossed, to dash to the lo. After five more incidents I began peeing blood and went to the first aid station, where a very cross nurse told me I had a UTI and needed emergency treatement. Kristin, Teresa and I drove the 5 hours back to Buffalo (stopping every 45 minutes so I could pee) where I waited in the waiting room of an urgent care facility to be told that yes, I had a UTI. Luckily there was a 24-hour pharmacy nearby and I was able to get antibiotics.
The next several days were filled with laughter, good food, and most importantly (and the point of this whole shebang!) BOOKS! I managed to buy 17 of them while on vacation; so many I had to buy a while new carry-on bag to make room for them. Glorious, simply glorious.
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After that lovely field trip we travelled to Ohio, where we drove an hour out of our way on Highway 6 (really just a poorly-marked residential street) based on MapQuest's directions. Spite, ire, and malice towards the makers of that horrible blight on the internet's otherwise unblemished reputation. We arrived at the hotel around midnight, fell asleep and woke up early for our first day at Cedar Point, which is apparently the largest amusement park in The World. There were seventeen- seventeen, mind you- large and nauseau-inducing roller coasters in this sprawling park. We managed to get most of them done before we crawled home hot and exhausted. My favorite- Top Thrill Dragster- goes from 0-120 mph in 4 seconds: I never knew it was possible to experience such severe feelings of nausea while still grinning from ear to ear.
The next morning, waiting in line for our second coaster of the day, I was overcome by the urgent need to pee. I decided to forego the ride and walk through to the other side of the track to run to the bathroom. Lucky for me, the roller coaster gods were smiling and an unnamed person on the car in front of me decided to take their camera along for the ride, flouting rules, regulations, personal safety, and the lives of everyone on and around the coaster. I asked to pass through the gates to go to the bathroom and was denied. I had to wait while one, two, three policemen came, the rider was reprimanded and escorted off. Only after that ordeal was I allowed, knees crossed, to dash to the lo. After five more incidents I began peeing blood and went to the first aid station, where a very cross nurse told me I had a UTI and needed emergency treatement. Kristin, Teresa and I drove the 5 hours back to Buffalo (stopping every 45 minutes so I could pee) where I waited in the waiting room of an urgent care facility to be told that yes, I had a UTI. Luckily there was a 24-hour pharmacy nearby and I was able to get antibiotics.
The next several days were filled with laughter, good food, and most importantly (and the point of this whole shebang!) BOOKS! I managed to buy 17 of them while on vacation; so many I had to buy a while new carry-on bag to make room for them. Glorious, simply glorious.
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